San Fran Sicko

'HIV Superinfection' Is Scary

2005-12-15T08:28:00.000-08:00

Just not scary enough to stop good ol' Hadley from boning HIV-infected strangers.

Listen to the single-name-only gay guy, diagnosed with HIV infection a year ago, describe his recurring nightmare in SF Weekly's tear-jerking cover story, which claims that "sensational headlines coupled with fearmongering public health reports have HIV-positive men in San Francisco running scared. It doesn't have to be that way."

"I became obsessed with thinking about it. I'd imagine new viruses attacking me while I was in the middle of having sex," he says, rolling his eyes at himself. "It got to me more than I'd like to admit. I'm terrified of superinfection."

So-called HIV superinfection happens (or doesn't) when an already-infected person gets reinfected by a different, perhaps drug-resistant, strain of the AIDs virus. But Hadley's alleged fear of superinfection doesn't show up in his response to finding out he got the "gay plague" while screwing "at least 100 sexual partners in his first six months" in San Fran Sicko. Instead, after discovering he was HIV-positive, Hadley went on an ass-banging binge, "racking up an estimated 300 more partners in his first year of infection. He says he did not know the status of many of those partners," the Weekly reports.

Now I don't really care what Hadley does at night. But I do wonder what effect AIDS drugs has on our out-of-control health-care costs. UNAIDS says "$22 billion will be needed in 2008 to reverse AIDS spread in (the) developing world." That's a butt-load of money.

Could that have anything at all to do with spiraling hospital bills? Just checking. That's a story I'd love to see the intrepid mainstream media explore, but instead it's too busy trumpeting the "pure pleasure" of the apparently fabulous gay Western flick, Brokeback Mountain.

P.S. Since all you randy rump rangers cruising the Frisco gay bars don't know Hadley's full (or maybe even his real) name, here's a description, courtesy of the Weekly: "Hadley is waif thin and nearly 6 feet tall, with unruly wavy brown hair and bright hazel eyes" who "moved to San Francisco from Tucson in 2003." If you see Hadley in the bar tonight, better steer clear, cowboy, before hoppin' in the saddle.

Schwarzenegger Plays Terminator

2005-12-12T13:26:00.000-08:00

With Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger's rejection of Stanley "Tookie" Williams' clemency plea, it looks like justice might break out in the Emboldened State.

While street thugs and inmates threaten violence when Tookie gets snuffed, similarly predictable leftists and professional race baiters play the only card they know. (That would be the well-worn race card.)

All I can say is, "Why didn't this happen two decades ago?" Why keep a gang founder and murderer alive for more than a week after his conviction? Good riddance, Tookie. Good luck in hell -- dress for warm temperatures.

Another al-Qaida Bastard Bites the Dust

2005-12-03T09:22:00.000-08:00

Gotta love those Predator UAVs: The CIA used one of the unmanned flying death machines to send Hamza Rabia straight to hell during an early morning missile strike.

Surely the Democrats who charge that President Bush has abandoned the war on terror will now accuse the United States of indiscriminate killing, since five other losers died in the Pakistani safehouse alongside al-Qaida's No. 3 man, and because a previous Predator attack killed eight others but missed Rabia:

Rabia was the target of another Predator attack on Nov. 5, according to local Pakistani officials. During that strike, in the village of Mosaki, eight people were killed in what is now described as an unsuccessful attempt to kill Rabia. Local officials have told NBC News that the dead included the wife and children of the al-Qaida leader.

The basic lesson to learn here? It doesn't pay to bunk with al-Qaida.

Mandate Health Care and Watch Jobs Flee

2005-11-27T18:35:00.000-08:00

San Francisco's socialist stuporvisors are at it again. The latest crackpot antibusiness scheme? Force small businesses with 20 or more workers to provide health care for all employees working half-time or better.

I'm no stranger to the health care price explosion; I happen to know how much even a crappy policy costs when you're self-employed and have to go it alone. Frankly, the costs of health care make it almost impossible for part-timers and independent contractors to get by in the Bay Area.

But that doesn't mean I think coverage should be mandated. Every person who takes a job does so freely. Every employee who accepts part-time work without benefits does so at their own risk and of their own volition. Last I checked, this was still America, land of the free (although sometimes here in California I swear there's a missing R in that last word).

Possibly the most amazing part of the stuporvisors' socialist scheme is the money involved. Chief wacko Supervisor Tom Ammiano -- who has not yet dinged his undoubtedly sweet health care package for a lisp removal -- says he wants to force the employers of the approximately 38,000 uninsured workers to foot the tab for their employees. The businesses would have to pay approximately $4,000 per employee, the Examiner reports. It's all part of an effort to "reduce the $25 million-a-year impact the uninsured have on our public health care system," Ammiano says.

But any idiot with a calculator can see the numbers don't add up. Quick: What's 38,000 times $4,000? It's $152 million. Where's the other $127 million, Tom? If the city was really worried about cutting the cost of health care for the uninsured, it should enforce laws against vagrancy and quit spending $22,000 an hour on bums.

If the socialists in City Hall make this misguided legislation a reality, what do you want to bet the city will see a huge upswing in employees with exactly 19 workers on the books?

Ramsey Clark Takes On Traitorous Task

2005-11-27T08:26:00.000-08:00

Lest you had any lingering doubts about our homegrown socialists' real agenda, Ramsey Clark -- a former U.S. attorney general who's been a longtime lion of the American left -- has flown to Baghdad to aid in Saddam Hussein's defense.

I'm sure Clark and his cohorts will say that he's just doing the right thing, like an ACLU attorney defending a NAMBLA pedophile. Well, it's time these twisted, anti-American freaks stop doing the wrong things.

One of my favorite redneck mantras is: "America -- love it or leave it." Well, Clark doesn't love America, and he's just left it. Let's bar him and other traitors from returning.

Zarqawi Dead in Iraq?

2005-11-20T13:20:00.000-08:00

Forensics experts are trying to determine if one of the eight terrorist crispy critters who blew themselves up after being surrounded by U.S. forces is chief scumbag Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, Debkafile reports.

Wouldn't that be cool?

No Thanks, Osama

2005-11-19T10:13:00.000-08:00

No Constitution, no booze, no poker, no banks, no homosexuals and no pictures of women in papers and magazines -- just a double dose of Islam. That's Osama bin Laden's starter plan for America, according to a new book that delivers the terror leader's Messages to the World.

The Guardian drops a few more of bin Laden's nuggets of wisdom, including this doozy: "Every Muslim hates Americans, hates Jews and hates Christians." It also includes undeniable proof that the sand-dwelling megalomaniac is a lousy poet:

I shall lead my steed/
and hurl us both at the target/
Oh Lord if my end is nigh/
may my tomb not be draped/
in green mantles.

What a dick.

The City That Forgot How to Rock

2005-11-17T11:30:00.000-08:00

When the Rolling Stones hit the stage Sunday at San Francisco's SBC Park, somebody turned the volume knob to 11. As a result, the concert could be heard over large swaths of the city. I heard it myself from Bernal Heights, probably 2 miles from the show.

The next day, the distant low rumble turned into a high white shriek, and the Chronicle ran a silly story about widespread noise complaints from the city's tender-eared residents:

Chronicle senior pop music critic Joel Selvin said in his review of Sunday's concert that "the music (was) blasting with surprising clarity for the volume."

No one had to tell that to Kepa Askenasy, an architect who lives on Potrero Hill. She said she loves the Rolling Stones, and welcomes concerts in San Francisco, saying it makes her feel part of the city. But Sunday's performance, she said, was too much.

"You couldn't be outside,'' she said. "It was over-the-top loud, almost violent.''

The touchy-feely description of how much Askenasy loves rocking to the Stones and feeling "part of the city" is typical for this pussified city, as is the bureaucratic response to the Stones' big bang.

"It was loud. It was bad. It was a shock. It was unacceptable,'' said Bob Davis, executive director of the Entertainment Commission. "The city wants to be friendly to concerts, but not to the detriment of the citizens."

The Torture Never Stops in Iraq

2005-11-17T11:28:00.000-08:00

Oh joy, sweet joy -- Iraqis are equal-opportunity torturers. While the headline -- "Baghdad denies all tortured inmates were Sunni" -- wins the prize for this week's weirdest, the bigger question remains: What the hell is wrong with these people?

What Can I Say About the Elections?

2005-11-11T10:22:00.000-08:00

Tuesday's unfortunate election showed the socialist tendencies of California in general and San Francisco in particular. All I can say is, "Bummer, dude."

Or maybe: Since when is San Francisco not governed by the U.S. Constitution? And why should a bunch of liberal crybabyies be able to grab my handgun? I mean, sure, if this fair city could be as crime-free as Chicago or Washington, D.C., -- the only other cities with similar gun-grabbing laws -- then maybe the loss of liberty would be worth it. Oh wait ... they're more crime-ridden than us.

Thank God for the NRA's lawsuit challenging the liberal lunacy.

Probably the most frightening aspect of Tuesday's blowout is Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger's apparent decision to go French and embrace appeasement in the wake of his embarrassing political fiasco.

Election Day in San Fran Sicko

2005-11-08T09:58:00.000-08:00

Today's the day. Get out there and cast your ballots and help turn the Emboldened State around.

Need help? It comes from an unlikely source: the San Francisco Bay Guardian. Sure, you'll be repulsed by the juvenile cover illustration of Dick Cheney in prison stripes. And you'll probably want to avoid the sex ads in the back ("Be gay!").

But the handy voting guide, which accompanies the paper's predictably tiresome and long-winded endorsements telling the Bay Area's lockstep liberals exactly how to vote and why, can be very useful if you're in a hurry.

Just clip the guide and take it to the polling place, then vote exactly opposite the SFBG's straight socialist ticket. Pay special attention to the amped-up triple admonishments -- the Guardian loves to roll out its emphatic "NO, NO, NO" recommendations for measures that threaten it's commie agenda -- always making sure not to take the SFBG party line on those.

It's a fairly quick and easy way to do your civic duty. Done and done!

P.S. Need more insight? Check the Frisco Libertarian and GOP party sites.

Insane Iranian Prez Spouts Off Again

2005-10-29T09:38:00.000-07:00

The Jew-hating crazy talk continues as Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad stands by his previous call to wipe Israel off the map.

"They become upset when they hear any voice of truth-seeking. They think they are the absolute rulers of the world," Ahmadinejad said on a day he marched with tens of thousands of demented Iranians. Some of these sand Neanderthals chanted "death to America" and "death to Israel," and dressed in white shrouds "in a symbolic gesture expressing readiness to die for their cause," according to the wire dispatch.

I've got a great idea: Let's give 'em their wish.

The wire story takes great pains to paint Ahmadinejad as either a great populist or a vulnerable lunatic. "It is not uncommon for an Iranian president to join marches in the capital," it reads. "Mr. Ahmadinejad was accompanied by five bodyguards, but otherwise security was not out of the ordinary for such an event."

So it seems it wouldn't be too difficult to get a handful of special forces (or even soccer hooligans) to break the venomous bastard in half. Of course, then there would be the messy problem of extraction. Probably best just to bomb the whole hate parade.

Bye Bye, Ms. Miers -- We Hardly Knew Ye!

2005-10-27T08:30:00.000-07:00

President Bush's latest crony pick has, at long last, become a thing of the past as Harriet Miers steps wisely from the Supreme Court nomination fray. Now maybe Bush will pick somebody outside his shrinking circle of friends -- possibly even somebody with some semblance of qualification for the job.

Perhaps Bush's failed "let's go with the people picker" move -- similar to his choice of Dick Cheney for VP way back when -- wass cagier than it appears, though. Maybe, like Caesar installing Mark Antony as people's tribune in Rome, he just wanted a puppet on the high court. (I'm no student of Roman history, but I think the TV show hews fairly closely to actual events.)

If that was Bush's motive, it's time to crank up the band and play "The Oopsie-Daisy Polka." Too bad, Mr. President. This is still America, and this empire ain't ready to fall.

Cindy Sheehan Gets Ready to Party Like It's 2,000!

2005-10-24T08:42:00.000-07:00

Batty "peace mom" Cindy Sheehan is getting ready for the biggest party of her life -- the one where she's gonna chain herself to the White House fence after the U.S. loses its 2,000th soldier in Iraq. Imagine her anticipation as the bloody milestone draws near -- she'll be back in the spotlight, smiling and mugging for the TV cams as the cops cut off her chains and carry her to the squad car.

What's with these ghouls of the radical left? They've been planning and waiting for this day like kids getting ready for Christmas. It's an evil anniversary they can really get behind. The whole thing makes me sick.

SF Sicko's fantasy? The cops mace and subdue Sheehan and her cohorts and put them in a real jail -- the kind with violent criminals -- rather than just giving these lunatics the celebrity perp walk they crave, then busting a catch-and-release move on them (like we do for non-Mexican illegal immigrants). Chuck 'em in lockup for a month, give 'em a real taste of the lawbreakers' lifestyle.

This would also let the "peace protesters" get an insider's look at the scumbags so often held up by the loony left as mere victims of oppression -- you know, the cutthroats and rapists who would have been Rhodes Scholars if only the GOP wasn't so gosh-darned mean. Give Sheehan 10 minutes in a cage with a D.C. street thug. Then we'll see how much she likes her new hobby of getting arrested.

SF Weekly's Weakly Music Awards

2005-10-21T10:18:00.000-07:00

If you needed undeniable proof that the San Francisco music scene is completely pulseless, all you had to do was go to the SF Weekly Music Awards last night. The whole production tilted along with all the wit, flair and panache of a church camp skit night. The emcees (all three of them) were lame and unfunny -- sometimes even reading their pathetic jokes from handheld cue cards. Attendance at the bum-ringed Warfield was paltry (even though the show was allegedly sold out).

The rappers in Federation were darling (especially the ones pinching their crotches like they needed to go pee-pee), and the mini gang of black kids dancing onstage to the sad little DJ -- for, what was it, a half-hour or so? --seemed really sweet. And possibly retarded -- nice of their minders to swing the little yellow bus by and give them their awkward moment in the spotlight. Who says minority kids don't get any breaks?

A couple of rock bands -- Parchman Farm and Rogue Wave -- were OK, though it seems unbelievable that they've been duly anointed by SF Weakly as the next big things. Maybe they really are the best this brain-dead city has to offer, but I'll take a long set of country covers by the Plain High Drifters any day.

I frankly don't know what to make of the video for "My Parachute Won't Open." The Weakly calls it "video magic," but it seemed pretty pointless to me, although I suppose I should be pleased that Frisco's senior citizens are getting their art on.

All in all, the night made me long for Los Angeles -- and that's no easy task, since I hate that smog-befouled SoCal metropolis. At least in L.A. there would have been a little bit of class instead of just a bunch of talent-free losers who've convinced themselves that they're geniuses.

700 Free Passes Out of Frisco

2005-10-20T22:56:00.000-07:00

About 700 hobos have hit the long road out of San Francisco, the Examiner reports. That makes 700 down, maybe another 2,000 or 3,000 to go. I saw at least 50 tonight that needed a one-way trip out of this overpriced prison. Say what you want about San Francisco, but it's no place for a drunk or a junkie or a crack whore to call home. Hell, it's hardly fit for decent working folks who make less than minimum wage (that would be about $50,000 a year).

Blasphemy of the Day

2005-10-07T10:59:00.000-07:00

Always remember and don't ever forget: Today's gang thug is tomorrow's affirmative-action hire.

Flight 93 Memorial Packs Not-So-Hidden Message

2005-09-12T17:22:00.000-07:00

What can any sane person say about the so-called Crescent of Embrace memorial that supposedly would honor the doomed-but-determined passengers of Flight 93 who died fighting Islamic terrorists Sept. 11, 2001?

How about: No thanks, you idiots.

Why would the panel that picked the winning design -- a huge red crescent that looks suspiciously like Islam's sacred symbol -- pick such a thing? It's an insult, and I can't put together a better argument against such a proposal than the one proferred by The American Daily.

The Flight 93 National Memorial will be built using federal and state funds -- I say let the half-wit bureaucrats know how you feel about such an abomination. It's not too late to turn this one around.

Lights Out, L.A.!

2005-09-12T17:16:00.000-07:00

A blackout lasting more than an hour hit Los Angeles on Monday afternoon after utility workers screwed the pooch. While more than 2 million people were affected from "downtown west to the Pacific coast and north into the San Fernando Valley," according to the Associated Press, no injuries were reported. The most amazing part is that nobody's blamed Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger or President Bush for the outage.

Schwarzenegger's Hands Tied on Gay Marriage

2005-09-08T13:29:00.000-07:00

While pushers of homesexual marriage claim Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger stabbed them in the back by promising to veto a bogus bill rammed through the legislature, even the Comicle must admit the Guvernator is simply upholding the constitution of the Emboldened State.

But even though the ongoing, misguided legal battle -- sparked by Frisco Mayor Gavin Newsom's lawbreaking move -- is stalled, don't think the gaygenda jihadists' will give up the same-sex wedding war. Their lawyers are already picking at Proposition 22, the "only heterosexuals should eat wedding cake" measure passed overwhelmingly by voters in 2000.

P.S. Everybody knows that nobody loves an inquiry like a liberal. Let's spend a few hundred thousand more dollars figuring out exactly how much Frisco cash nancy-boy Newsom wasted on his fay wedding free-for-all.

SF Alt-Weakly War of Words Continues

2005-08-25T11:53:00.000-07:00

In the latest salvo, SF Weekly sends a note from Bay Guardian publisher (and noted nutcake) Bruce Brugmann to a graphologist for handwriting analysis. Not surprisingly, the words "ego" and "prickly" come up a lot.

Bush Bashers Running on Fumes?

2005-08-25T11:01:00.000-07:00

I almost laughed out loud when I read the Associated Press hit piece with the gaseous headline, "Of All Gas Consumers, Bush May Be Biggest." The joke journalism even works in the following detail, guaranteed to fire up the grass-roots outrage: "Taxpayers still foot the bill."

No duh. We foot the bill for every ride taken by every politico and every bureaucrat as they "work" to "represent" us.

My immediate reaction (after the threat of laughter subsided) was, "Gee, I remember President Clinton and VP Gore making an awful lot of trips out here to the Bay Area during the dot-com boom. Lots of motorcades." Well, hand it to Matt Drudge for dredging up twin blasts from the past: Clinton Set to Double Presidential Travel Record and Global Warming Alert: Gore Burns 439,500 lbs. of Fuel to Attend Summit.

(It's all particularly ironic in light of the SF Comicle story from a couple of days ago bemoaning the fact that Bush hasn't visited the city yet.)

Global Warming Lawsuits a Go

2005-08-24T21:43:00.000-07:00

Get ready for a flurry of litigation, probably ending with a huge pile of money paid out on the basis of junk science. And dig the dateline on the AP story. It had to be here.

Another Reason Frisco Sucks

2005-08-22T12:42:00.000-07:00

Hunters Point Naval Shipyard decides it's time for its tenants to move along. That means less space for artists, musicians and others. Bummer, dudes.

Bush Blows Off Frisco

2005-08-20T21:30:00.000-07:00

Shocking news in this Comicle "scoop": President Bush is the first chief exec to shun San Francisco since Calvin Coolidge.

Can anybody blame him?

Possibly more shocking than Bush's extended absence from The City That Forgot How is that the Comicle's story doesn't attack the president, instead quoting levelheaded folks who point out the obvious.

"He'd be crazy to come," said Gladys Hansen, curator of the Museum of the City of San Francisco. "Once, San Francisco was such an attractive city, and everyone was welcome. Today it's not as attractive, and basically you have to be on the 'right' side to be welcomed."

A Hoover Institution fellow continues with the common sense: "The president could announce a cure for cancer, and the pictures would be some protesters from Code Pink trying to put a pie in his face," said Bill Whalen, who wrote speeches for the first President Bush.