Sasssquatch

Update!

2013-05-02T19:56:00.002-07:00

April Showers Really Do Bring May Flowers.

I cried, and wept and was utterly dramatic all throughout the month of April. BUT IT'S MAY (insert *nsync joke) and I've got some exciting things planned for this blog.

Stuff thats so exciting I can't even tell you yet.

So forgive my extended absence from this blog

it is officially

I should be back around mid may

Cheers to the future of this blog

and cheers to summer

xoxoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

Dear Pussycats,

2013-04-21T19:29:00.001-07:00

Dear Pussycats,
This is a formal letter to explain that I am not and have not been a-okay.
Lately I've been forcing a smile on my face, on this lovely blog in an effort to feel okay, but I am simply not. I've been bogged down with stress and anxiety and I feel like someone took all of those deep suppressed insecurities that live in a dusty box in the attack of my heart and dumped them on the floor, and I am left to deal with all of it like those clean teams on horders. I'm feeling unconfident and insecure and frankly, I think I need a tiny break to figure out my life, figure out my blog and figure out what the eff I'm doing with all of it.
Thus leading to my future absence from this blog.
I just need some time.
Thank you for letting me vent, and I apologize now on behalf of my absence.
Sincerely,
Caelan

EVENT TOMORROW

2013-04-20T00:07:00.001-07:00

THE EVENT IS TOMORROW

I really REALLY hope to see yall there!

Still Into You.

2013-04-18T12:45:00.001-07:00

Still Into You:

Topshop Goddess Hayley Williams' Style and a Simple Outfit Recreation

Hayley Williams has been on my radar for a long time now, being a fresh female rock vocalist for this generation. Not only is she refreshing to hear on the mainstream radio which is chock full of male musicians, with no particular talent (ie Pitbull), but also her new look is so on point, with a little help from my personal favorite, TOPSHOP...duh.

Watching this music video, I can't help but think that Ms.Williams is my kind of weird, its the perfect amount of cutsey + badass with a little bit of gross. Aside from how cute she looks, this song is really catchy, and their is nothing I love more than a catchy tune (One Directioners, you know whats good). So I thought I'd try to recreate her outfit in this music video and show you what other awesome TopShop things Hayley has been wearing.

SO according to Stealherstyle.net, which is amazing website if you ever wanna jack some serious famous swag her outfit consists of:

Outfit Details

Dress:Syren

Top: TOPSHOP

Jacket: Karma loop

Tights: Urb-Clothing

Boots: Doc Martens

Since I aint got that kind of moola, I thought I'd create my own ready to wear version!

Outfit Details:

Top:TOPSHOP

Dress: American Apparel

Tights: Pretty Polly

Boots: Doc Martens

Jacket: American Apparel

It didn't hurt that I was working on this awesome neon spray paint-y project that worked as the perfect backdrop to these photos!

The thing about Hayley's look is that it is simply FUN. Go out and wear neons, cut your bangs really short, just do you and trust me, it will be amazing!

Since this post is getting really long, I will just leave you with her StealherStyle page and you can see all the wonderful TOPSHOP goodies she owns and buy a few for yourself.

So whats your most favorite Paramore song?

Do you like Hayley Williams new look?

Have a great day

Please, keep it sassy

xoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

Hang The DJ

2013-04-18T02:03:00.001-07:00

HANG THE DJ
A simple outfit posts and mixed tape

Topshop is young, Topshop is hip and most importantly Topshop is LOUD.
Being the clothing of the people, Topshop simultaneously acts as the visual voice of the people as well, Topshop provides us with style so we can dance to the tune of our own kazoo.
When I think of Topshop and I think of music, I think of raw, classic rock sounding diddies, but also techno beats that are light as little fairies, I think of powerful female vocalists and interesting instruments, I think of EVERYTHING.

So in preperation for our own live DJ this Saturday, my manager sent me some songs that were of the Topshop variety

And because I'm cute
I thought I'd feature my spring-y music-y related outfit

Outfit Details:

Striped Top: TopShop

Floral Top: TopShop

Skirt: Mural

Socks: TopShop

Shoes: Alice + Olivia

So I added a few more songs to this playlist and voila

feel free to follow it on spotify or whatever don't, see if I care

Well that about has it pussy cats

sorry for the lateness of this post but better late than never right?

so have a wonderful evening and please keep it sassy

xoxoxox

Sasssquatch

P.S. 3 DAYS

TopShop: The Creation and My Personal Experience

2013-04-16T13:12:00.003-07:00

TopShop:

The Creation and My Personal Experience

Topshop is an across the pond multinational fashion retailor, that specializes in creating the perfect look for the poshest london gal. They sell clothing, shoes, make-up and accessories, but what they really sell is this beautiful idea, when you enter Topshop, you enter london even if you are in one of the other 36 countries which have Topshop, you leave Topshop feeling like friggin spice girl. With over 440 shops and online operations including the Nordstrom website, its only becoming easier and easier to shop this London look.

Founded in 1964 as Peter Robinson's Top Shop, this youth fashion brand was a tiny branch of the Peter Robinson, now-defunct British department store chain. The first stand alone store opened up in 1974. Topman was created in 1970 as the male counterpart spin off and you best believe all men who shop Topman look sharp as all be.

2010- Topshop opened up in New Zealand

2011- Topshop opened up in Australia

2012- Topshop opened up in South Africa

and they literally have stores all over the world including kuwait #random

There are six flagships: Oxford Circus London, Broadway New York, Liverpool One Liverpool, Briggate Leeds, Chicago and now The Grove Los Angeles.

TopShop not only carries amazing RTW pieces at great prices but also has a their Topshop Unique line shown at Fashion Week. Topshop is expanding faster than my waistline while eating fish n chips at a london pub!

Topshop is visionary, Topshop is fresh and Topshop is my favorite clothing brand.

Outfit Details:

Top: Topshop

Skirt: Topshop

Hat: Romwe

Shoes: Vans

Now my personal experience.

I heard of Topshop in Highschool after being obsessed with Hannah Murrays character Cassie from Skins and her entire wardrobe. I found the website and fell in love. I bought this super cute blue velvet purse and used it all the time carrying my high school belongings on all of my wild adventures. Then christmas rolled around and for two years I would just order a fat Topshop order and that was my gift, as that. So by the time I found out I was going to England, to say I was excited to visit a real TopShop store was an understatement.

I FELL IN LOVE.

My love affair with Topshop was a torrid occasion to say the least, it was hot, heavy and expensive. I seriously spent all of my money at Topshop within the first day I was there.

I visited every single Topshop store I saw while I was in the UK. But of course, the Oxford Circus location was by far the best.

When I came home I was depressed and broke and my future wasn't looking too bright, Betsey was closing and I needed to find a new job ASAP. Then all of a sudden my darling friend Blair recommended me to her darling friend Michelle who was managing the new department opening up in Nordstrom that just so happened to be TOPSHOP.

I went to my interview wearing my spiked headband and mustard yellow dress and tried my best to incorporate everything I learned about the feeling that Topshop provides their customer with.

I GOT HIRED and its safe to say my wardrobe and life have been positively impacted greatly by this job. While I size and space racks in my department, I daydream of going back to London, spending all my money and falling in love all over again.

When we get new shipment my heart literally skips a beat.

When I see celebrities wearing Topshop I get SO excited.

This brand is my life, my love and my lady. While this sounds a bit cliche and stupid, I'm a dreamer, and I dream of living the Topshop life. Every time I buy something or sell something, I've giving and receiving part of the overall Topshop experience and that makes my day.

I'm such an anglophile and a Topshop addict that this is by far the most perfect job I could ever have, all I need next is to move to London and continue working there for the rest of my life!

What was your first TopShop item?

What was your experience like shopping there?

Have a great day pussycats

and please keep it Posh

xoxoxoxox

Sasssquatch

P.S. 4 days till the event

PANIC ON THE STREETS OF LONDON: An Exciting Event and Posh Post

2013-04-15T19:58:00.002-07:00

PANIC ON THE STREETS OF LONDON:

An Exciting Event and Posh Post

Now as yall know, I'm an anglophile to say the least.

Another thing you probably know is that not only do I work at TopShop for Nordstrom, but I am in fact OBSESSED with TopShop and Nordstrom (I'm not just saying that cause they pay me).

SOOOOO since like 90% of my wardrobe now consists of TopShop items, I thought I'd pay tribute the poshest fashion line around, by dressing up in best TopShop digs for the week, all the way until saturday becauseeeeeeeee

WE ARE HAVING AN EVENT.

If you live in the Honolulu region please come by! There will be a live DJ, makeovers and makeup by Smashbox and I repeat GIFT WITH PURCHASE

now this is not just an announcement post,

I come prepared

I will seriously be posting a different outfit post a long with an article EVERYDAY till the event this saturday!

Outfit Details:

Undershirt: Topshop

Dress: Topshop

Jacket: H&M

Tights: Some corner shop in Scotland

Shoes: GoodWill

Pin: Romwe

So I hope you enjoyed this post, and I hope I see you this saturday at the event

have a great day

and please keep it TopShop

xoxoxoxox

Sasssquatch

It's Delightful It's Delicious, It's Delovely.

2013-04-12T15:21:00.000-07:00

It's Delightful It's Delicious, It's Delovely.

A Simple Outfit Post

(GAHHHHHHH I HAVE A TEEN VOGUE COVER DRESS AHHHHHHH)

Outfit Details:

Dress: TopShop

Zebra Charm: Betsey Johnson

Purse: Diane Von Furstenberg

Shoes: Jeffrey Campbell

I wore this dress a couple nights ago to an event at the Honolulu Academy of art with my darling sisters!

also wanted to point out, this show combination worked really well too.

Socks: TopShop

Shoes: Urban Outfitters

Photo from the Academy of Art Facebook Page.

Which shoe do you like better?

What did you think of the latest issue of Teen Vogue?

Have a great day

and PLEASE keep it sassy

xoxoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

The ABC's for Bad Ass B'z: G

2013-04-11T14:51:00.001-07:00

The ABC's for Bad Ass B'z:

G is for Gloria Steinem

As a freshman in high school, I lived in this bubble, I had a very basic understanding of the world, but it wasn't until my Thinking Women class taught by my professor Kristie McEwan, that I really began to think differently.

We learned about Gloria Steinem and boy was I in awe.

If you have been living under a weird misogynistic rock and you have no clue who Gloria Steinem is let me teach you a little something.

Gloria Steinem is an american feminist, investive journalist, a social and political activist and is recognized as the leader and media spokeswoman for the women's liberation movement in the last 60's and 70's. She founded organizations a-plenty, received many awards, and wrote many articles being published New York magazine and Ms. magazine. She worked along side Jane Fonda and RObin Morgan to cofound the Women's Media Center, an organization to empower women through their voice in the media. After years and YEARS of being awesome, she still has a presence in politics and in women's rights being a commentator, writer, lecturer and organizer campaigning for candidates and reforms as well as publishing books and articles

GLORIA STEINEM IS THE BOMB.

There is SO much to talk about when discussing this incredible lady, but if I begin, I fear you won't be able to stop me.

"Any woman who chooses to behave like a full human should be warned that the armies of the status quo will treat her as something of a dirty joke. That's their natural and first weapon. She will need her sisterhood."

Here is some advice for young girls

Have a great day, and Please keep it sassy,

xoxoxoxox

Sasssquatch

HAPPY REX MANNING DAY.

2013-04-10T20:53:00.001-07:00

HAPPY REX MANNING DAY:

a not so simple outfit post

When I entered 7th grade, I realized I was no longer a child. I began to feel angry for no reason, I felt like no one understood me, the grosser my skin got the move angsty I got, then one day I looked around and thought to myself "holy shit, I'm a teenager." That being said I had no clue what kind of teenager I wanted to be, I didn't even know I could feel all these angsty feels; then all of a sudden a VHS of the film Empire Records just sort of fell into my life and the rest was history.

While trying to figure out the concept of being a "teenager," I didn't follow my peers, I religiously studied 90's teen films, (evident in my prom post). This being said I completely fell in love with the unbridled teenage rebellion that occurred in those films, everyone had perfect skin, spectacular clothes and a great set of friends, I mean is this like a Noxema commercial or what?

For months I would watch Empire Records over and over after school. I found comfort escaping my drab 7th grade 2004 life and dreamt of life in the 90's, where there was no Myspace (facebook hadn't been invented yet), Paris Hilton or even bedazzled trucker hats (2004 was a rough year). I loved the grunge, I loved the angst, I loved the political awareness, but most importantly, *disclaimer loser statement soon approaching* I dreamt of having friends like that, I've literally found journal entries from 7th grade explaining actually that.

Anyone who has invested time into a fandom knows that reality sucks, and movies and television and books don't suck. So I would just repeat this movie over and over again, and I felt happy, it was a lot better than my middle school existence and it inspired me to rebel against corruption! Damn the man! SAVE THE EMPIRE!

And today (well actually monday) is no ordinary day
its REX MANNING DAY
the day in which the entire movie is bassed around.
This, ladies and Gentlemen is Rex Manning, gah

We mustn't dwell, no, not today, we can't cause its Rex Manning day.

Outfit Details:
Sweater: Brandi Melville
Bra: Victoria Secret
Skirt: Vintage
Belt: Vintage (I bought it in 7th grade, I was OBSESSED)
Socks: Urban Outfitters
Boots: Doc Martens

I realize I've been talking about this movie without actually talking about the movie.
It takes place over the course of one day.

Ugh, I keep wanting to talk about it but I think you just need to see it for yourself
so here is the trailer and some stills.

I don't think you guys understand how much I love this movie.

One of my senior quotes was "What's with Today, Today"

I love Liv Tyler, I love buying CD's and records, I LOVE THIS MOVIE

So lets all have a cupcake, pop some speed and fornicate with has-been celebrities on this very momentous day

at least thats what I'll be doing.

Have a great day

and please,

keep it sassy,

xoxoxoxox

Sasssquatch

Prom, YES PLEASE.

2013-04-08T10:12:00.000-07:00

PROMORAMMA:

A not so simple outfit post

"PROM? But Sasssquatch, you're 20 and a sophomore in University, you couldn't possibly be going to prom and more importantly, why are you so obsessed with Prom, you nut job? You're like that one creepy girl that returned to high school after she graduated, to go to prom with friends "for fun," because she peaked in high school and is looking for redemption in the form of walking down the hallowed halls that used to greet her so kindly, but have now become a distant memory. WHY SASSSQUATCH WHY!?!"

Well, to answer your questions and concerns it is simple, I am perpetually a teenage girl, I also have more prom dresses than I have occasions to wear them. And the cherry on top of the cake, is that I have scary neighbors that own a limo parked right outside of my house, I think they are running a brothel... But regardless this perfectly placed limo allows me for perfect Prom photos, even if I'm not going to prom ever again ever. Anyway I've been quite enamored with the idea of Prom for a long time now and even I don't really know exactly why.

What is with our weird obsession with this quintessential "right of passage," known as prom?When we think of prom we think of, beautiful ball gowns, our lives ending as high school seniors and segwaying into adulthood aka college, you hear the song "Graduation" by Vitamin C play softly in the background as you slow dance with the school heart throb in plastic crowns as you look into each others eyes and whisper "I wish this moment would last forever." But in actuality all prom really is, is an excuse for hormonal teenagers to bump and grind to Pitbull, drunk off of whine coolers and sweating through there $300 rhinestone incrusted gowns that look nothing short of baby pageant full glitz cupcake dresses.

So why people, WHY?

As a high schooler I attended an all girls school, I didn't know any boys till I was 15 and while being one part social outcast that gave no fucks, there was also one part of me that always dreamt of that gross cliche, John Hughes, high school experience. I wanted John Cusack to stand outside of my window with a boombox, but instead of Peter Gabriel I'd personally prefer the song stylings of Lil Twist. I wanted Judd Nelson to pump his fist in the air due to my sassy red head charm, after he stole one of my earrings, I wanted Jake Ryan to make out with me over flaming candles while I pray to god that I didn't wear something flammable, I wanted Freddie Prince Junior to transform my geeky self into "all that," goddamnit. And even though at the time, I knew it was lame and would constantly reject the idea, I secretly loved it and romanticized the idea completely. As most high schoolers do.

I never had a "promposal," I never had matching outfits, I never had after prom sex at a cheapy hotel, the ratio of girls to guys at our proms was 5 to 1. I did however take one hell of an awkward prom photo (see left photo) and I did show up to one of my proms wasted and had to get escorted out, but that wasn't supposed to happen THAT WASNT HOW PROM WAS SUPPOSED TO BE, Molly Wringwald was so disappointed with me.

I think High School sucks, and the media leads us to believe that with things like Prom, and pep rallys, that maybe we wont drop out and start doing meth if believe in this quintessential "high school life." It's as if with one dance the whole pimpley-drama filled- SAT prepped- bullshit high school experience wont seem completely awful. What is ironic is that we are lead to believe that this is it. You go to prom and then you die, your life is over once you graduate because thats what happened to our favorite sitcoms (No one watches 'The College Years'), we are told that high school is the best time in our lives and that if we don't enjoy it we will live miserable lives forever.

Thats not the case.

Prom is awkward. Highschool is awkward. When you think about it Prom is kind of like the high school experience shortened into 3 hours, you eat shitty food, you listen to shitty music, you sit only with your friends, but through what seems to be a shitty night you have fun, the Jock Douche Assholes will forever be Jock Douche Assholes, but the best part of Prom is that you realize that once this high school thing is done, you will never have to see these people ever again. Prom is kind of like a "good bye," and believe me, saying goodbye to High School is one of the best goodbyes you will ever say.

and remember anyone who "enjoyed" high school and wasn't bullied or ridiculed, ends up having a beer belly and failed dreams.

Outfit Details:

Dress: Betsey Johnson

Flowers: Ben Franklin

Earrings: Vintage

Clutch: Vintage

Heels: Betsey Johnson

Its fun for me to dress up because even though I am no longer a high schooler, I still dream of a live that is better than what I have. While my dreams now consist of something a bit more substantial, a promising journalism career and a french bull dog named Frodo, I will always have my head in the clouds dreaming of that dream life that only happens on the big screen.

What was prom like for you

do you wanna see more posts about prom?

I've got SO many prom stories and photos let me know down below

Keep it Prommy

xoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z: F

2013-04-08T02:37:00.001-07:00

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z:

F is for Fran Drescher

Fran Drescher is an American film and television actress, comedian, producer, activist and has the best laugh I've ever heard in my entire life.

While beginning her career as merely a "character actress," Fran began to break rules and pave the way for female comedians creating her own TV show The Nanny, a smashing success which lead to a very successful film career. This includes my favorite The Beautician and the Beast which she also produced.

I don't admire Fran Drescher only for her excellent comedic timing, her tiny tiny waist or even her amazing hair, I admire Fran Drescher for how she overcame her personal struggles and traumatic obstacles that I couldn't even fathom.

In January 1985, two armed robbers broke into her apartment and while one ransacked her home the other raped Fran and her friend at gunpoint, while he traumatizing r husband at the time was tied up and forced to witness the entire ordeal. After that horrifying ordeal, and years and years of recovery she now looks at the even in a positive light saying "My whole life has been about changing negatives into positives."

Another perfect example of this was after discovering her husband was homosexual, they got a divorced, remained best friends, created a television show together called Happily Divorced and she obtained her marriage license and married three gay couples.

She was diagnosed with uterine cancer in 2000 and had to undergo a radical hysterectomy but was given a clean bill of health by Doctors. She wrote about her experience in her second book Cancer Schmancer, encouraging people to become more aware of the warning signs of cancer and to protect themsevles. This lead to the Cancer Schmancer movement helping all women get diagnosed at stage 1. Not to mention her work as a Public Diplomacy Envoy for Women's Health Issues.

"If we don't empower ourselves with knowledge, then we're gonna be led down a garden path"

The reason Fran Drescher is one of my favorite women of all time is this, she faces any battle in her way head strong and determined and undoubtedly herself.

Its more than I could ever aim for in my own life.

THAT LAUGH THO

GAH I DIE.

Fran is one of my idols for countless reasons.

Now I must go, I have to finish Beautician and the Beast

Have a great day and please keep it franny

xoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z: E

2013-04-07T01:52:00.001-07:00

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z:

E is for Eleanor Roosevelt

As the longest serving first lady, lasting 4 full terms in office, Eleanor Roosevelt was nicknamed "First Lady of the World" by Harry S Truman and with good reason.

While life wasnt always easy for Eleanor Roosevelt, she stayed strong and courageous despite a cruel mother, a cheating husband, the second world war, and many MANY other speed bumps along the way. She encouraged FDR's work as president as an excellent first lady but also sought to fulfill her own life and make her own damn rules.

She was the first first lady who frankly, gave a damn; she held press conferences, she publicly disagreed with her husband, she wrote a syndicated newspaper column and would speak at national conventions. She really cared about women and their role in the workforce and the civil rights of African Americans and Japanese Americans and the rights of WW2 refugees.

After FDR passed away she continued being a total badass, persuading the US to join the UN and becoming a delegate, servivng on the UN Commission on Human Rights and just being an overall revolutionary woman!

While doing many unlady like things, she paved the way for all outspoken awesome women after her. She cared so much about so many different types of people, and she really used her prominence and privilege to benefit so many different types of people. For example she invited hundreds of African Americans into the white house and made sure that Marian Anderson could sing.

To put it bluntly.

Eleanor Roosevelt is the world's greatest homie.

"A woman is like a tea bag- you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water."

and if you wondered what she sounds like, voila!

Eleanor Roosevelt has been a personal hero for me since I was a young girl. Its rare you hear of people who are so unapologetically kind hearted yet completely outspoken and brave that they manage to improve hundreds and thousands of peoples lives.

Eleanor Roosevelt helped many people in her time, but her impact on history was so grand that her influence keeps going. Eleanor Roosevelt made my life a much better place, I think thats something we can all say.

Is Eleanor your favorite first lady too?

Have a great day and please keep it unladylike

xoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z: D

2013-04-05T14:43:00.000-07:00

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z:

D is for DITA

A burlesque dancer, model, costume designer and actress, Dita Von Teese does it all while looking absolutely immaculate, I mean seriously, does this woman own sweatpants?

Being classically trained in ballet, Dita incorporates this into her famous strip teases, as well as her life long love of lingerie, Dita is iconic.

Nicknamed The Queen of Burlesque, Dita was at the forefront of the Burlesque revival and has graced many a magazine cover as well as many big screen films.

Dita is the quintessence of urban renaissance because, while JT brought "sexy" back, Dita brought "Glamour" back all while being completely liberated and doing things on her terms.

I find what she does to be the most empowering act a woman can do.
She takes control of her sexuality and her body and I think that is absolutely amazing.

AND THIS CLOSET, I DIE.

"You can be the ripest, juciest peach, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches."

Dita Von Teese is a true feminist, and visionary

and she is one of my major idols not just for laundry but for all aspects of my life!

So have a wonderful day

and please keep it classy

xoxoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z: C

2013-04-04T22:36:00.001-07:00

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z:

C is for Cher

Oh lawdly lawd lawd Cher is my GIRL.

She is a total awesome feminist WOC who runs an AMAZING twitter account and is the only artist to have spectacular hit singles in the past 6 decades. She seriously sashayed her way through multiple genre's of music, the film and television industry, broadway and all while being an amazing humanitarian.

YES, Cher, YES.

An almost EGOT-er, Cher has paved the way for female musicians, actresses, moguls and autotuned enthusiasts alike.

She modeled for Richard Avedon

She is also a total awesome advocate for Transgender rights, being the mother of the totally bad ass Chaz Bono, loving him and supporting like the spectacular mother she is.

and she totally started the colored hair thing just saying.

She makes me feel like I can wear rhinestones if I want, she makes me feel like I should be proud to be who I am, she makes me feel like I can do anything I want and if I want to tweet about my colonics than I damn well can.

"I don't need a man. But I'm happier with one. I like to have someone I can touch and squeeze and kiss. But I don't fold up and die if I don't have a man around."

So Cher,

Cheers to you for being fucking great.

You deserve the 250+ awards that you've received over your lifetime

Do you love Cher as much as I do?
Have I convinced you that you love Cher yet?

okay well
Have a great day and keep it timeless
xoxoxox
Sasssquatch

The ABC'S of Bad Ass B'z: B

2013-04-04T00:49:00.000-07:00

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z

B is for Beyonce

All HAIL QUEEN B

I could tell you about her back story, I could tell you about my favorite songs of hers, I could even do the single ladies dance for you, but that isnt why we are discussing her.

Ladies and Gentlemen I've been obsessed with Queen B since day 1.
Ever since I saw her wear all orange camo in the "Say My Name" music video, I've been completely hooked on her girl power-self empowered- hardworking-bootylicious-no shit taking jamz and damn can that girl WHALE.

Or maybe I fell in love with them during their cameo apparence on Smart Guy...either way its been a long time.

What I wouldn't give to be that baby, Blue Ivy, seriously tho, can we body swap or....?

Most recently there was a Beyonce concert that played in between two halves of some big sports game or something like that, all I know is that I was so emotionally invested and completely bewildered in the amazingness that is Beyonce, that I shed several tears into my plate of BBQ hotwings from Pizza Hut. THATS LOVE RIGHT THUR.

She made an entire music video for every album on B.Day
She made a video for Michelle Obama to help childhood obesity
She's a modern day feminist
yes yes yes Beyonce yes.

She is the quintessence of raw girl power maturing into polished bossness, she is everything I aspire to be as a mogul and more.
There isn't a SINGLE music video that I don't like. And not to get ridiculously sappy or anything, last last december I went through a really rough time with bad friends and a bad situation and I was totally in a funk for awhile and the one thing that no matter what, put a smile on my face and made me feel better if only for that mere three minutes and 22 seconds was Beyonce.

So here is some bougie B, and some all natural B

"Does being a feminist mean that I believe that I'm as good as any man? Yes."

And if this doesnt do it for you

I actually don't know what will.

And if my calendar is correct, her album drops tomorrow!!!
so go out
buy it, you know you want too
Have a great Beyonce filled evening
and please keep it Sascha Fierce
xoxoxoxoxo
Sasssquatch

The ABC'S of Bad Ass B'z: A

2013-04-03T02:02:00.003-07:00

The ABC's of Bad Ass B'z

A is for Alexi Wasser

Based off of my favorite childhood book "The ABC's of Being a Girl" and of course my dear friend Jess Buckley's "ABC's for April," this month I thought I'd go through the alphabet naming some bad-ass B'z that inspire mez.

Beginning with Alexi Wasser, aka Imboycrazy

now if you haven't read her blog, but you are currently reading mine, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE!? She is all I could aspire to be as a writer, blogger, peppermint patty enthusiast and over hilarious minx with eyelashes for days and a very quick tongue.

photo credit Alexi Wasser

She writes about life as a modern woman in this crazy sexed up, confusing world.

With a radio show/pod cast and a twitter account she updates frequently its easy to follow her. And after reading a few posts in her series "The Blind Leading the Blind" you will begin to see her image burnt into your morning toast, Alexi Wasser is a divine spirit that you will worship. It'll be like one of those weird fruit punch cults except with way better shoes.

just watch this video she made about side boob

She will become your spirit animal, the little devil that sits on your shoulder or more importantly your new best friend.
Whether she is interviewing dreamy boys, discussing delectable celebrities, or answering your questions, Alexi is here for you and then some. She's kind of like the real life version of Samantha from Sex in the City and Kimmy Gibbler but only in the most loving non acid wash wearing way.

"You are a woman. You have the power to cast spells over men with your words, your silence, gestures, eyes and actions. This power can be super fun/entertaining, and will most likely result in an epic make out and/or someone falling in love with you. I can't stress how much power you have enough. Use it wisely."

Now, why spoil the mystery for you

you certainly need to discover this blog for yourself

if you go leave her a comment telling her I'm sending my love

Are you a frequent Imboycrazy reader?

let me know down below

have a great day

and PLEASE,

keep it sassy

xxoxoxoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

Late Night Ramblings: (1)

2013-04-01T21:24:00.000-07:00

Late Night Ramblings:

McDonalds at Midnight

Some random thoughts while I stuff my face

Take time for you this week, whether its one more nap, a rolo Mcflurry or a bath while naping or eating a Mcflurry. The moon is in a strange phase and you may get a little bat shit Gary Busey stir crazy, so dont feel bad for giving yourself some much needed "you time."
While many trends have been recycled time and time again, can cow print never happen...ever again. That and leather cowboy hats, toes rings, and anything that resembles something from Mark McGrath's closet, lets just leave 2001 in the history books.
Short hair is the new crazy colored hair. Lets be real we've all damaged our hair beyond hot oil repair. Do yourself a favor and chop those locks, I don't regret it.
Does anyone else stick their tongue out like one of those shitzu pups when applying mascara?
Why are McNuggets so perfect? To paraphrase that tiny boy who resembled a young, actually funny "Larry the Cable Guy" from Wife Swap, "chicken nuggets is my family."
If you havent seen the movie "Rock of Ages" don't. I just saved you two hours wasted. Tom Cruize is weird and all about the sexualz.
If you find that the only thing you and a dreamboat have in common is your mutual love of Netflix, your relationship will last as long as the duration of the amazingly cancelled Pretty Wild.
Friends don't let friends drink chocolate chip frappuccinos at 8:30 in the morning, bubble guts will ensue.
When thinking "should I wear a fedora?" just punch yourself in the face instead.
If when getting dressed you are stumped for what to wear, think "What would Zenon the girl of the 21st century do?" (or WWZD for short) trust me your look will not be inky to the fourth power squared.
When in doubt. Check your privilege
Words I can't spell: privldge, asethcic, conscieous, embaress
Things I'm into: The Bling Ring, Feminist Facebook Groups, The New Normal, pistachio gelato, late night target trips, pretending school isn't happening.

What are some of your late night thoughts?

Have a great evening

and please

keep it sassy

xoxoxoxoxoox
Sasssquatch

Whateverrrrr

2013-03-31T22:05:00.000-07:00

Angsty On Easter:

A Simple Whateverrrrr post

I'm really crabby today

and I'm not going to write a lot

Look at this face

this face is not amused.

Outfit Details:

Dress: UrbanEccentric

Necklace: TopShop

Purse: Anna K.

Shoes: Vivienne Westwood

I feel sad

but I don't wanna talk about it

I think Im gonna go cry into my stack of cadburry easter chocolate eggs

CLICK HERE to read my much better post about Easter last year

Have a great day guys

xoxoxox

Sasssquatch

Nice Guys Finish Last?

2013-03-30T11:38:00.000-07:00

Nice Guys Finish Last?

Pussycats, I'm here to talk about a very serious matter with you all today

and that matter is "nice guys"

while I touched on this subject briefly in my How To Break Up With Friends post, I thought I would delve more into the topic.

To begin, lets have a toast to the douchebags, and to the asshats of the world, these, pussycats, are the men we will be speaking of today.

So of course to begin you have your outright jerks, guys who are sexist, racist, bigots, homophobic, transphobic and rude etc they are obvious and very easy to spot, (look for any dude wearing a Monster Energy Visor and or matching T-shirt, that maybe smells a bit of BO and Bodman fragrance). But then there is a second bread of douchebags and this we define as the "nice guy."

When I say "nice guy" I'm not actually talking about nice gentlemen, I'm talking about THAT guy. The guy who is your friend and will help you out, but only because he hopes for something more, and the second you explain that you see him as only a friend, because he was being...friendly, he immediately writes you off as a "bitch."

Classic traits of this "nice guy" are: constantly doing favors for other people, constantly explaining about all the favors they do for other people, constantly reiterating how "nice" they are, expecting people and the world to treat them differently because they are just so "nice" and they constantly bend over backwards for other people so why don't they get what they want huh? why don't they get a fucking break huh? Also constantly using the term "friend zoned" and explaining how they always get hurt by girls :(. boo effing hoo.

Well "nice guys", let me explain something to you.

We are taught as small school children that we should be kind to others, growing up (and working retail), we've learned that many grownups do not keep this in mind everyday.

However you should do nice things for other people because you care about them or maybe because as a decent human being it would be kind, not because you want something in return.

Don't you dare slut-shame or name-call a woman who doesn't reciprocate your feelings or because she put you in the "friend zone." Every human is entitled to their own feelings and emotions and are fully capable of deciding whether or not they want to date you and or have sexy time with you. If you want to date a woman, passive aggressively doing her favors and treating her really nicely in hopes that she will just randomly decide she has feelings for you isn't reality, its part of your internalized-mysogniystic-toomanyLifeTimeoriginalmovies-and-NicholasSparksNovels-Mamaloving-EmotionallyManipulative-Entitled-Insecure-deluded mind.

Lets face it buddy, in the real world you don't get jack-shit for being nice.

But we all try to do it because we should

Its kind of like christmas, we were tall taught its about giving, not receiving you asshat, so if you give me the gift of helping me when my car is towed don't expect to receive the gift of a relationship or sexy time or anything like that.

And FOR THE RECORD. If after reading this you've realized you know one of these "nice guys" you should tell them WAKE UP BUDDY, YOU AINT THAT NICE.

so pussycats, the second you realize that you've got a "nice guy" on your hands, head for the hills, because dealing with one of these is like trying to figure out where the remote control is while hungover with only one contact lens and the promise of an egg mcmuffin nowhere in sight...its impossible.

If you like someone, ask them out.

If they turn you down, MOVE ON, there is no need for name-calling and over all class-less-ness

Here are some awesome videos on the subject:
the1janitor
Modprimate
JennaMarbles

Have you guys ever dealt with a "nice guy"

I know I have

Tell me all about it in the comments

have a great day

and please, keep it sassy

xoxoxoxox

Sasssquatch

This is How to Be a Spring Breaker.

2013-03-29T12:03:00.000-07:00

This is How To Be a Spring Breaker.

Pussycats, it is Spring Break! And while this one week out of the year is a bigger tease than Gypsy Rose Lee, I thought I'd share with you what I do with my days off. As many of you know I live in Honolulu, I am so lucky to have beautiful weather 364 days out of the year, but don't you fret, I try my hardest to never take these days for granted. So I thought I'd bring out my SPF and greet the sunshine head on, instead of how I usually do, with massive sunglasses, a cloak and very loud hiss (I am a vampire afterall). Now I know what you are thinking, "But Sasssquatch, I don't live near the beach!?!" Well pussy cats, I have the ultimate solution for you, BACKYARD STACATION BONANZA BLITZ. I invented the term myself. Bascially you put on your most favorite bathing suit, later yourself up like its your day job and roast in the sun like a rotissary chicken. Bring your favorite tunes, favorite book and even favorite beach supplies (it sets the mood) and fry crispy.

Now I only kid about the frying part, stay safe wear SPF, but while sitting under a giant umbrella you certainly need something to quench your thirst

so here is my recipe for my Sassy Citrus-aide

it's actually ridiculously easy.

STEP 1: Find a lemon, orange and lime

STEP 2: Cut said lemon, orange and lime

STEP 3: Juice said lemon, orange and lime

STEP 4: Pour said juice in the blender

STEP 5: Add Water and ice cubez

STEP 6: Add Sugar, I added 3 spoonfuls but its up to you then blend till delicious.

STEP 7: Super Awesome Party trick

if you want to rim your fancy drink with sugar what you'll need to do is pour some honey and sugar on a plate

Then cover the rim of the glass in honey

then in sugar

STEP 8: VOILA, you are fancy as hell

I chose to add a strawberry because I'm REALLY fancy, but that last part isn't required.

Outfit Details:

Bikini Top: Victoria's Secret

Bikini Bottoms: American Apparel

Sunglasses: Ebay

Watering-can purse: Pylones (I bought it in England and have yet to feature it in a post wth)

Scarf: Alexander McQueen, ebay

Book: Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs by Chuck Klosterman, Barnes and Nobles

Spring break is about FUN! It's about giving yourself time to relax, its about giving you a tiny delicious taste of summer all while allowing you to procrastinate school work for an ENTIRE WEEK.

What did you do this spring break?

What are your summer plans?

Have a wonderful rest of the week

Keep it sassy,

xoxoxo

Sasssquatch

Spring Breaker!

2013-03-28T15:17:00.000-07:00

I Rode My Bicycle Past Your Window Last Night:

A Simple Outfit Post.

The beauty of spring break in my eyes is not getting schwasted in Cancun off of giant watermelon daiquiris, while fist pumping to the song stylings of LMFAO, in a Girls Gone Wild trucker hat. The beauty of spring break is not watching ANTM reruns in my underwear.

The beauty of spring break isn't necessarily even riding your bike around your neighborhood in your favorite camo jacket. The beauty of spring break is that it is a week in the middle of the semester where you can do WHATEVER YOU PLEASE.

Outfit Details:

Dress: Topshop

Jacket: Topshop

Boots: Steve Madden

Bike: Left from a Wes Anderson themed party from our dear friend Bianca

Also check out my AMAZING new do, by my favorite Lanee Roth aka La Hair Artiste!

How do you spend your spring break?

Have a great day

and PLEASE, keep it sassy

xoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

Charming Chinatown.

2013-03-27T11:01:00.001-07:00

Charming Chinatown:

A Simple Outfit Post

Today was a very busy day! I went to the doctors, filed out paperwork for my passport, had lunch in chinatown with my momma, organized my bank information and deposited all my fat dollars from my tax return

Outfit Details:

Turtleneck: American Apparel

Jacket: Vintage from my Mama

Shorts: American Apparel

Shoes: Vans

Bag: See by Chloe

Our lunch at Mei Sum in Downtown Honolulu was DELICIOUS.

My mom is the cutest person in the entire world.

so cheers to an awesomely productive day with my mamma bear

I hope your day was as busy one

have a great day

and please,

keep it sassy

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Sasssquatch

I am Doll Parts.

2013-03-26T14:07:00.000-07:00

Doll Parts:

A Simple Outfit Post

Because this outfit consists of many of my favorite separate outfit pieces put together

and I wanna be the girl with the most cake.

Outfit Details:

Top: American Apparel

Jacket: H&M

Skirt: Betsey Johnson

Boots: Steve Maden

Socks: TopShop

What's your favorite kind of cake?

Mine is strawberry with vanilla frosting and pink sprinkles!

Keep it sassy,

xoxoxoox

Sasssquatch

How to: Break Up With Friends

2013-03-25T10:25:00.000-07:00

How to: Break Up With Friends

Now I know that I've done many love based posts in the past, but this post is about another sort of love, friend love, or the lack their of. It's about breaking up with friends. Now naturally, I have the tendency to cut people out of my life the second they do me wrong but here are some warning signs that you need to cut someone out of your life, and this is how to do it!

Warning Signs:

I've had many a bad friend over the years, here are some obvious red flags

1. They Lie

I once had a friend who lied lied lied about EVERYTHING, I later found out she was seeing this boy that I fancied and hanging out with him behind my back, filling his head full of lies about me such as "Caelan is obsessed with you," "Caelan tells everyone that you two are already and item" and most embarrassingly "Caelan has already planned out her wedding dress." So if you catch a friend who is already a pathological liar, get out while you can, it will only lead to bad news.

2. They don't respect your right to your opinion

I had this friend who would try to shut me down when I had an opinion that was different than hers. In fact, we got into a facebook discussion today and she was so unhappy with my different opinion that she deleted me off of facebook *cough* butt hurt *cough.* But thats the thing, friends like that are ignorant and immature and don't deserve your time! Friendship is about listening to each other, knowing when its okay to disagree and letting their opinions roll off your back.

3. They fit our favorite, "Nice Guy" mold

The boys who are your "friend," until you tell them that you don't see them as anything else, and they fly off the handle about how they are such a "nice" guy and that you are a bitch for not liking them back, look forward to a future post ALL ABOUT this so called "friend."

4. Jealousy

Jealously leads weird people to do weird things. This goes a long with resentment. I once had a "friend" who dated an exboyfriend after me, I could tell that due to the nature of his and my relationship that she was jealous of me, and it lead her to act in a very immature and mean manner, including assuming I was writing mean anons about her and then talking shit about me all over tumblr, REAL mature guys.

5. They get under your skin

When you have a friend that irritates you so much, whether its complaining about their lives (which are very privledged) or how they copy you all the time if you are fucking irritated with someone its time to LET THEM GO.

6. Controlling

Don't let anyone try to control your behavior, your thoughts, your actions, the way you dress, the food you eat, ANY OF THAT.

7. They Don't Make an Effort
In a relationship their needs to be a 50% 50% effort. If its unbalanced and you find yourself going out of your way to pick up your friend when you are the one with school and work and they are doing nothing with their lives except playing video games, its time to GO.

8. They Take Advantage of you
If for one second you feel like you are being used, whether its for your new pair of Jeffrey Campbells, or your car, or even just a $4 latte, GET OUT! Don't let people take advantage and use you for the things you've worked hard for in your life.

9. They Guilt trip you
omg, we've all had this friend, "you never come out with us!" "you said you were gonna let me borrow those!" "Are you kidding me, it's only $5 dollars!" UGH no, just no.

10. Most importantly: They make you feel bad about yourself

if you have a friend who makes you feel not adequate, or not worthy you need to say goodbye. I had one best friend in the past who was very emotionally abusive and he always made me feel like I wasn't good enough, that I wasn't smart enough or pretty enough or skinny enough. You know what, YOU ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH.

Other obvious redflags: boyfriend stealers, shit talkers, meanie weanies, self confidence busters, name callers, slut shammers, and just overall dumb people ALL NEED TO GO

now how to do it

there are two ways.

1) Try to wein them out of your life
Little by little, talking less, screening their calls or even better get a job, start a blog, any new hobby that will actually make you really busy you won't even be lying when you bail on them!

Its passive aggressive, but unless the person is a real idiot they'll get the fucking message, and if not, just always say you are too busy to hang out. That's the beauty of breaking up with friends, you don't have to give them a reason, like breaking up with boyfriends or girlfriends; you can be a 5 year old about it.

2) Band-aid style: just cut off all communication

block them off fb, tumblr, whatever it takes GET RID OF THEM LIKE YESTERDAYS TRASH. It may be hard if you go to the same school, or live nearby but trust me, your life will be so much easier without worrying about

Sure cutting someone out of your life may be awkward at first

but if this friend made you feel shitty, and made your insides all pretzel-y than believe me, you're better off without them.
Trust me, I cut out a friend the day I wrote this post, and now a week later, when I'm editing this I realize I already feel 100% better about it and I do not regret a thing.

Let me know if you have any other questions

Keep it sassy,
xoxoxox
Sasssquatch