No, the launch party has not yet been totally nailed down. I am drowning in my things to do list. But the book is OUT! My dear friend, Heather Moore (who helped me in the editing process of this book) wrote me yesterday to let me know she bought a copy at Seagull Book and Tape. I am so jealous of her. I haven’t even seen my baby in its physical form yet. But I am wicked excited about the release of this book simply because it is a really awesome book. You guys will all love it. I promise.

And to celebrate, let’s do a giveaway thing. Become a follower of this blog and leave a comment stating you’ve done so and I will have one of my kids do the drawing. If you’re already a follower, just leave a comment stating such. The contest will close on July 14th, just because that’s my daddy’s birthday and everyone should celebrate my daddy’s birthday (the entire country of France does every year). 

The prize? Well duh–it’s a free copy of Eyes Like Mine, and because I love you all so much and want you to be blessed with good reading, we’ll do a second drawing where the lucky winner gets a copy of English Trifle.

Getting a copy of English Trifle is way cool because it isn’t even available in bookstores until late July. You will want to read this book asap because it is simply so much fun! Since I have such awesome connections in having Josi Kilpack as one of best friends, I can get you a copy now. It’s true; I am cool. Actually, it is because of Josi that I didn’t give up or give in when things in my publishing life looked dark and terrifying. She helped me edit this book, advised me on conflict (which she is so good at) and acted as all around cheerleader when I got depressed. Everyone needs a Josi Kilpack in their lives.

Since Eyes like Mine is a time travel novel, it might be kind of fun to know if any of you could have a visitor out of the past stay in your home for a week , who would you want and why?

For me, if the person we’re meeting is a relative, I would want my Great Great Grandma Minnie Crawford. I found a journal page she wrote while doing my genealogy and felt such a connection to this woman who lived through so much and persevered to the end.  Grandma Minnie lived 99 years. She died two months before she hit the century mark two years before my birthday. I would like to meet her and have her meet me. I would like her to know what her life story meant to me in my life.

If I could meet up with a non relative, I’d want to spend that time with Jane Austen. I know I’m predictable, but wouldn’t she be fun to show the future to? I’d take her to see her own movies to see what she thought of them. I think she would be sooooo much fun to hang out with.

“You love your characters too much,” she said. “You’re afraid to let them get hurt.”

I can’t argue with her. I *do* love my characters. They are funny, and charming. I would go to movies with them and invite them on vacations if they were real.

“You have to let them get hurt!” she continues later in the manuscript. “Burn them, Julie! Burn them!”

Let me clarify a few things about  this particular manuscript: Anyone who knows me knows I like writing good conflict, but I wrote this book to be a candy bar book–empty calories that are fun to consume but have no real value. It’s a romantic comedy. In the need to write a whimsical book after several books that were emotionally draining, I ended up with this one–a light breezy romance in the same vein as Notting Hill with Hugh Grant. What kind of silly woman wants to burn  a miraculous man find who looks like this:

But after much contemplation, I have dug a little deeper and found that there are some other ways I could strengthen the conflict without losing the whimsy of romantic comedy.

And as I’ve continued, I’ve realized that the characters have to be burned at some point. How will I ever know what they are capable of if I never give them the chance to damage themselves?

My daughter’s moving in less than a month. 28 days and I will no longer be there to keep her from getting hurt. And yet, how could she ever know how strong she is if she doesn’t ever get to flex her muscles? How will she know what she’s capable of if she never takes chances, fails, succeeds, lives?

I wonder if God shakes his head at us silly mortals as we shake our fists at him. As we curse him for our trials, does he say, “It’s for your own good! I promise you’ll thank me later! If you don’t hurt, how will you ever know what you’re capable of?” He has to let us get hurt for our own good, our own learning, our own expansion into a greater universe.

I feel suddenly more grateful for my challenges.

Just as I have to let Rae go, for her own good so she can know that she is strong–not because I told her she was strong, but because she stood on her own two feet and proved it.

Prom 1988

Mr. Wright and I just passed our 17th wedding anniversary. It’s been 21 years since our first date. It’s hard to believe we’re that old. The man is a total punk. He teases, tickles, does butterfly kisses on the kids’ cheeks so they giggle in church when we’re supposed to be quiet. He is altogether infuriating. He is amazing.

It’s no secret the kids would choose him over me if given the choice. I don’t blame them. I’d choose him too. I think back to the person I was when he met me. I was wretchedly ugly–too skinny, too pale, no sense of how to present myself, and I had no confidence. In the time we dated he changed all that. Not that he changed how I looked, but how I saw myself. And by seeing myself through his eyes, I found I was someone worthwhile. And then he left for his mission for our church.

2 years.

He told my grandmother before she died that he was going to treat me so good that while he was gone on his mission, no one else would be able to compare. And he fairly well did it. There were a few guys who ranked pretty high, but in the end, it all came back to Mr. Wright. It’s amazing what a girl can learn in two years.

1. Some guys are physically deformed in a way that is not readily apparent. Though they appear to have only two hands–they really have four or more.
2. Dating during poverty ridden college years could be viewed the same as going to a soup kitchen–the company might not be great but you got fed, so who can complain?
3. One small argument with your boyfriend on a mission in a foreign country through mail takes months and is exhausting.
4. Learning how to stand on your own is imperative if you ever want to stand with someone else by your side.
5. Never give your phone number to people you don’t want calling you.
6. A pretty face gets boring if nothing intelligent ever comes out of it.
7. You can recover from tripping over love. Falling in love is forever.
8. If someone asks you to marry them and the word, “NO!” screams inside your head, do not allow the word, “Yes.” to fall out of your mouth.
9. Looks Nice and Nice Looking do not exactly mean the same thing. (see number one about the hands)
10. The marriage decision is the one and only time where you have the right to make a totally selfish choice.

I’m glad I made a selfish choice in getting married to Mr. Wright. Even when he’s annoying, I’m grateful he’s annoying me rather than some other less deserving female. He puts up with a lot from me. And I’m glad to say that after 17 years, he’s still likes me for reasons I still don’t understand. So I guess we’ll keep each other.

I blinked the rain out of my eyes and had a moment of panic. I have no life saving skills. I can’t resurrect a once beating heart with cpr. I can’t do mouth to mouth unless we’re talking about kissing, and I certainly don’t know the first thing about cuts and bleeding. When the arm moved, I almost screamed. Instead I yelled out, “Are you okay?”

The young driver wasn’t dead, but looked pretty shell shocked. He scrambled out of the car on the other side since his side was thrashed and the door no longer opened. I had him sit in my car where it was warm, dry and glass free while we waited for the police. After my initial shock of seeing blood, I realized the kid’s cuts were all surface–ugly, but non  life threatening. I figured keeping him talking would be the best thing to do so I asked where he was going. Sheepishly, he said, “I know it sounds kinda nerdy, but I was going to play some RPG with my friends.” RPG means role playing games.

I grinned. “Well, it sounds kinda nerdy but I’m just coming home from spending a weekend at a fantasy/science fiction convention.”

So that’s how I gained  a new friend.

The CON was great! I loved getting to be with my fav people. I’d start name dropping on how I know way cool people, but you all already know that Lee Modesitt, Jessica Day George, James Dashner(who is new york right now and he didn’t even invite me!), Aprilynne Pike (who hit number one on the NYT list–Congrats Aprilynne!), Mette Ivie Harrison, Jaime Thelar, Howard Tayler and his beautiful wife Sandra are all my friends. Oh wait . . . did I say I wasn’t going to name drop? Karen Hoover was a great roommate. And the ah-ha moment of the weekend was the realization of how much I love these people. LOVE them. And am grateful for the many things they are in my life. It might be kinda nerdy, as the car accident victim said, but I love hanging out at science fiction and fantasy conventions.

It is official that Eyes Like Mine ships to bookstores on July first. I am planning my launch party and will post more info when I have it, but I am so excited to see this book become a reality. My editor is awesome . . . have I mentioned that yet today?

And I finished the first chapter of my new novel. It kicks butt. I am beyond thrilled with this new book. There is a perfect amount of conflict, humor, adventure, and romance. I love it when I know where is a story is going right from the beginning.

AND I’ve been working a lot, writing a lot, and volunteering for a lot so if I seem to be missing online, don’t call the police to start searching for the body. It’s just buried under a heavy pile of have-to-do. Happy writing and reading everyone!

Have a great day to ladies everywhere!

Eyes Like Mine

Here’s my new cover for my novel Eyes Like Mine. I am really excited about this book since it is truly a beautiful story. And remember all that whining I did about abridging the book and having to cut out HALF the words?

Well, my way cool and incredibly awesome editor decided an abridgement wasn’t necessary. That’s right, folks. I got to keep every word. I know!!! I am so excited (as you can see by my grammatically incorrect coupling of punctuation)! It’s already up on Seagull’s and DB’s websites which just staggers me since I don’t even have my official release date yet.

This has been such an amazing week, I’m not even sure how to process it all. First, I have the storymakers conference which is the highlight of my year, then I get an agent–and not just any agent–but Amy Jameson! Then I get an email from The Ensign magazine offering to buy an article I sent in, and now my cover and news of the no abridgement. I completely endorse the ”no word left behind!” program Kirk has placed me on.

Seriously, I have burned so many calories from all the jumping around I’ve been doing.

First, my daughter has chosen to go to Tuacahn. We had freshman orientation there and the school really is just amazing. I am excited for her future. I will miss her a ton when she is away, but she isn’t that far and we will be able to visit her and have her come home on weekends fairly often.

I did edits last week on my manuscript, Eyes Like Mine, for my editor, Kirk Shaw. I heard a rumor that I should be getting cover art pretty soon. I’ll post it as soon as I get it. This book is seriously amazing and I can’t believe I wrote it. Look for it in July!  I love my editor. He is ten shades of awesome.

My baby brother graduated from BYU and I am so proud of him!

This last weekend was the Storymaker conference and Whitney Awards. What a weekend! I was able to meet several people who I know via the internet, but have never met before in person. I loved meeting Luisa, Kimberly and Melanie. You guys are great. I wish I wasn’t so busy so I could have spent more time talking to you. I was able to spend a breakfast with James Dashner, Dean Lorey (Nightmare Academy) and  Janette Rallison (My Fair Godmother) who I never get to see often enough or long enough.

As you all know, my path to publication has been a long and hard road. Jeff Savage was in charge of the conference and showed a video clip from Facing the Giants where the coach blindfolded one boy  on the football team and told him to carry another player on his back across the field using nothing but the strength of his arms. He told him to make it to the fifty yard line. You can see the video clip here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vB59PkB0eQ

Don’t worry I’ll wait while you watch it.

I incorporated Jeff’’s message into my class and made all the people in my class put on the blindfolds Jeff had placed in their bags.  Then I asked them to visualize their own writing careers, to imagine the weight and burdens they carry. I explained that, because they are blindfolded, they don’t know but that the next step they take is the last one into the end zone. If they give up, they’ll never know what could have been.

*I* needed the class I gave. There have been so many times I have wanted to quit–so many times where it hurt too much to keep going. But I didn’t quit–even when it hurt.

Yesterday, I was told I could take the the blindfold off. I found myself in the end zone. Yesterday, agent Amy Jameson offered representation as *my* agent. Doesn’t that sound lovely? Repeat it with me: “My agent.” Yeah . . . it  sounds good to me too. Amy came highly recommended to me by several people I love and trust. She is great at what she does. And I really, really like her. I think this is a good match for me and I am excited to begin this new phase of my career. My current query letter is at 100% as far as effectiveness goes. Everyone I have sent it to, whether agent or editor, has requested at least a partial (and in many cases a full) manuscript.  I’ll post that query sometime as an example if you guys would like.

Conference was great. I learned so much, and felt so much love from the people around me that is was quite overwhelming.

The Whitney awards were fabulous and I was honored to be the one to present the 2008 Lifetime Achievement Award to Orson Scott Card. Scott couldn’t be in attendence (He’s in Japan, which is too bad because he missed my brilliant speech about him) but he sent an acceptance letter which was read by Rob Wells. Josi Kilpack looked like a million bucks and I am definitely borrowing her dress next year. The skits were fun, the awards winners deserving, and the evening filled with joy and commraderie.

Thank you to all my dear friends who hugged me, and cried, and laughed, and hugged me some more when I shared the news about Amy being my agent. I’ve appreciated you all being there on the sidelines screaming, “You can do this! Give it your best!” as I’ve made the death crawl over the literary field and into the end zone. I know it’s not really the end. There is still much to do, but this last step felt like a giant leap in the right direction.

I am exhausted and will write more later. In the mean time–have a great day everyone!

Kirk Shaw (editor) and me

She’s leaving me, and it’s my own fault.

My daughter wants to be an actress. “Acting is hard,” I told her. “You’ll have rejections, and critics, and people constantly telling you you aren’t good enough.”

“But I can deal with that,” she said. “I’ve watched you deal with it with your writing, and you always come out on top.”

She really wants this and I’ve been the example that they can have what they want if they’re willing to work hard enough. She wants this like she wants air. She wants it like I want a four book deal with Harper. And so when she got the brilliant idea to go to Tuacahn High School in St. George, I couldn’t say no, because I know what it’s like to want something so huge. I know what it’s like to drop pennies in fountains and make wishes bigger than the sky. I let her apply.

Three days ago, I got the email that said congratulations.

I cried and held this information hostage until I could process it and deal with it  on my terms. And I cried some more (and continue to do so). Friday, while she was at the regional science fair, I made her favorite dinner, pulled out the china, and crystal, and sparkling white grape juice. I made place cards with messages in them for the kids.

For the boys, the cards were little notes of how proud I was of their accomplishments and their work. In hers were the words, “Congratulations! Tuacahn said yes!”

All the while, I swiped tears from my cheeks and hummed the tune slipping through my fingers by ABBA. Wasn’t it just a moment ago she was placed in my arms and pronounced MINE? Isn’t there a parental contract that we’d get to keep her for eighteen years? After several years of infertility and praying for a child, we were given a gift so beyond delightful, and now I am giving her permission to leave four years before her contract with me is up. Foolish, foolish mom.

And yet, how could I say no? How could I hold her back from reaching? Wouldn’t that make me a hypocrite of the worst sort?

So I made dinner, set the table, lit the candles, and held my breath while she read the words inside her card. I won’t lie that I cried some more, but found myself surprised when her hazel eyes  met mine and they were also brimming with tears. She was excited and scared–overwhelmed. When our eyes met, it was with the knowledge that our lives were shifting, and the roles that we play for each other will change with that shift.

She can still back out, she has some time to decide for certain. It’s a grown up decision–the one to grow up. There are friends here, life here, brothers here, dad here and ME here. It’s good to know I am part of the reasons to stay. It’s good to know she’ll miss me. But ulitmately, I think she will go. Not because we are pushing her that direction. On the contrary–we are staying absolutely out of this decision. It has to be hers. But she will choose it because she has made wishes bigger than the sky.

I asked her, “Would you think I was a bad mom if I confessed I’ve been praying for you not to get in?”

She hugged me and said, “I think you’d be a bad mom if you’d been praying for anything else.”

Several moths ago, at dinnertime, one of the kids asked, “Will you celebrate when we move out?”

Mr. Wright said, “Yes.”

And we will. We will celebrate the lives  stretching out in front of them like blank pages in a book waiting to be filled with grand adventures. We will celebrate and, apparently, we will cry.

My husband has always wanted me to write a mystery novel. I mean ALWAYS. He’s even bought me all kinds of “how to” books on writing mysteries. I’ve got books on weapons, poisons, motives–the works. It is a huge disappointment to him that I haven’t cracked the spine of one of those how-to books. But the next best thing to ME writing one is my best friend writing one, isn’t it?

I think so.

Josi is so incredibly busy planning writing conferences, and doing book stuff that I decided to forego the usual interview for her. I mean really, we all know that Josi is awesome and rocks the literary foundations of the world, so what more do we need to know about her (aside from the fact that she’s incredibly organized, snarky enough to make me laugh out loud, has awesome taste in food and music, and obviously has awesome taste  in friends, because she does like me enough to answer her phone when I call)?  Besides, once a person reaches Goddess status, it becomes just too much for us mere mortals. This is why I decided to interview one of the main characters of her new book (the mystery I will never write . . . sorry, honey).

There are all kinds of characters in the book who I could interview. I could interview the detectives, the murderer(though the murderer seemed a little unstable and wasn’t up to answering questions), the murder victim (though she was dead boring), the murder victim’s son (but let’s face it, what could he tell us since he was missing for the entire book?) or I could interview our heroine, Sadie Hoffmiller, but I hear this sassy culinary detective is on another case . . . somewhere in England if rumors are right.

So I interviewed the only other character available who was present for all the exciting stuff: the lemon tart. He was very obliging and doesn’t seem to mind the lime light even if he wishes it were lemon.

Me: So, wow, you were Anne’s last concern before she met her untimely demise. How does that make you feel?

Tart: Well, of course that makes me feel pretty special, but then . . . all tarts are special. Do you have any idea what kind of work goes into making a masterpiece like me? If you’re leaving this world with a lemon tart on the mind, you’re leaving this world happy.

Me: I do imagine you would feel special, but it might be a bit extreme to say she left the world happy. She was murdered after all.

Tart: Murdered schmurdered. She had a perfect lemon tart in the oven. She was happy; believe me.

Me: I’ll have to take your word for that. So what did you think of Sadie?

Tart: I knew right away she was one classy dame, right? She was the only one of the inefficient bozos to notice I was still baking. You have no idea how hot it gets when you start overbaking. When Sadie rescued me, I knew right away she’d figure out the whole murder thing.

Me: And figure it out she did. You have to admire a woman who can solve a murder case and make perfect applesauce on the side.

Tart: Hey. Why don’t you stay on topic huh? We’re not talking about any second rate applesauce. We’re taking about lemon tarts here. Didn’t you notice I am the cover model for this book? Didn’t you see my great pose? Applesauce has got nothing to do with this, got it?

Me: Um . . . er . . . right. Oh hey, look at the time. We’re going to have to cut this short but I appreciate you talking to me before your big finale.

Tart: Finale? What finale? Hey, who are all those guys with the spoons looking at me all hungry like that? Wait a minute! You set me up! Sadie! I’m sorry I insulted your applesauce! Sadie! Come save me!

Me: Well folks, that’s the end of our interview. I mean it . . . he’s all gone now. They didn’t even save me a bite. But you can take a bite out of a delicious read by going out and buying your own copy of Lemon Tart by Josi Kilpack today! And to share a little in the excitement, Josi’s Lemon Tart hit number one on the Deseret Book bestseller’s list. Josi really does rock!