Secret Confessions

sex with my sister

Anonymous — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 18:08:54 +0000

I am a 15 year old girl, and I have done many things I am not proud of. One of the main things is doing…sexual acts with my step-sister. To be more specific, we acted out stuff like rape scenes and all of that, we didn’t just go straight to having sex. We both masturbate and we both watch porn and we constantly made jokes to each other. I don’t know why we did it. I believe we learned most of this stuff from her father (my step-father), because he molested us. When her brother found out what their father did, he made us tell our school because our parents wouldn’t listen.

Now we’re all separated and I am just starting to realize how wrong and messed-up our relationship was. I don’t believe we’ll ever see each other again, which makes me both sad and relieved. I miss them, but I’m ashamed of myself for what we’ve done. I believe in God, and I’m afraid of what he thinks of me. I worry that I won’t be forgiven, and I feel so horrible about it because the whole time we did it I knew it was wrong. Has he turned his back on me? I know I would.

This confession is from Secret Confessions - sex with my sister | Twitter Updates | No comment

Why does helping people hurt so much

BreakingPoint — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 07:33:23 +0000

My mom just recently lost her job, I am a 17 year old female who has had a steady job since the age of 15 my 19 year old brother has had 1 job in his whole life(I’ve had 3) I help my mom pay bills and I help pay for a little of her wedding when I have the money but since she lost her job she has started keeping all of my paycheck so I have no money. I love helping people I really do. I hardly ever ask for anything in return(all of what I ask for is help in return but I don’t ask often because it makes me feel guilty). I am a senior in high school and school recently started back up the 1st week of school I worked 64 hours and went to school keeping up with all of my homework so my mom would stay happy. My brother broke his phone and is getting a new one bought for him(with the paycheck my mom took from ME!). I have to come up with money for college, drivers ed, a car, and a house for me and my boyfriend. Along with paying all the bills and buying grocery’s I have to come home every night from work and clean the house then cook dinner before I can get my homework done. With all my friends asking for help and advice on their lives and dealing with my home life and school and work I am getting so stressed out and depressed. my routine is wake up, school, get out go to work, come home clean, cook, homework, run a mile, shower, and bed. Nothing else. It depresses me to the point I feel like I am breaking and I have nothing to hold onto… I need help and no one can see it…I cry everyday and I cry myself to sleep every night. Nobody can see that I am breaking…not even my boyfriend understands how bad off I am…I haven’t thought of suicide in 2 almost 3 years and I thought of it for the first time today I really contemplated it…I have also started feeling like turning to cutting is my only release from this horrible pressure I feel. I have a weight on my shoulders that I can lift…not by myself…it may sound stupid but it is truly how I feel. I need help but nobody will help me…I’m screaming out here and no one seems to be able to here me…I feel so lost and alone and scared…I’m breaking and I fear if I break again I won’t be fixable….=/ how do I deal with all this pressure?

This confession is from Secret Confessions - Why does helping people hurt so much | Twitter Updates | One comment

Sex-Starved Wife

Anonymous — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 05:31:44 +0000

I am sexually frustrated with my husband and my frustration is driving me mad with desire to have sex with one of my exes. I haven’t cheated yet, but I probably will if my husband doesn’t have sex with me as frequently as I would like. I want sex two to three times every day.

This confession is from Secret Confessions - Sex-Starved Wife | Twitter Updates | 2 comments

going insane dealing with an alcoholic

anonymous — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 03:28:36 +0000

what do i do! its my boyfriends mom and she takes tylenol 3 with her beers she is always in a bad mood all the time and i have to live with her and my boyfriend. shes a bitch to me she hates me and i want to kill her

This confession is from Secret Confessions - going insane dealing with an alcoholic | Twitter Updates | No comment

Im scared

Emily Rose — Wed, 08 Sep 2010 01:26:47 +0000

Im scared to tell my mom I love her. She was diagnosed to die in a year. Shes been suffering from MS for 6 years now. Her spinal cord was severed. And no matter what, shes always been there for me. When I need her, she doesnt care about her own pain, she puts it aside and comes to help me. I treat her horribly, and I cant change no matter how hard I try. I love my mother.

This confession is from Secret Confessions - Im scared | Twitter Updates | 2 comments

how can i still be in love with you

anonymous — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 03:54:54 +0000

you say we had sex. i know we did. i deny it because the next night you slept with her. it was my virgnity and you knew.

This confession is from Secret Confessions - how can i still be in love with you | Twitter Updates | No comment

I HATE MY FATHER!

The good son who no ones care about — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 01:52:20 +0000

Why is he always like that with me?
I never do anything and he keeps torturing me psychologically… I have already tried the suicide, I drinked a who bttle of medicine, but in place of death I just got drunk… I don’t know how that happened but I guess soon I’m gonna kill my self again… I know some people do have bigger problems than I do, but what I don’t have psychologic for such thing!
Soon I will be dead and all that pain will be gone! No more anger! No more torture! No more problems! I WILL BE FREE AFTER ALL!!!

This confession is from Secret Confessions - I HATE MY FATHER! | Twitter Updates | 3 comments

Domestic Fights

Anonymous — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 08:01:22 +0000

I’ve beaten up or been beaten up by every member of my immediate family at some point in my life, even as a young child. I’ve hit my mother, been beaten with a belt by my father, been knocked out by a 2×4 piece of wood, saw my brother throw my mother through a glass window, and many more other instances. When I was little, I thought this was normal, but as I’ve grown up, I realized else wise. I purposely went to a school far away from my parents for college because they drive me insane. They make this temper come out of me that doesn’t exist around anyone else.

And I’m afraid to open up to anyone or even have a family of my own someday because I don’t want this cycle of abuse to continue.

This confession is from Secret Confessions - Domestic Fights | Twitter Updates | 3 comments

Last Day Of My Life…

_Anonymous_ — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 01:21:22 +0000

I have a pretty privileged life, I have a car that my parents pay to keep and fuel. I have a flat that is paid for. I have food when I want and even have fast broadband and cable TV.

So why is it that I spend most days contemplating how I am going to end my own life?

I will ask my mum to cook with me when i visit her and she will find the recipe and buy expensive ingredients, but all I really want is for her to help me learn to cook. Not spend out and then do something on her own and leave me to follow the step by step in the book.

I try to have hobbies that I can share with my dad but he will buys us both the equipment that we need for whatever fad we have chosen to try, do it one with me once and then give me the stuff to do it on my own in future.

It seems like things are perfect from outside but all I want is for my parents to sit and watch TV with me or even come around to see my place, once would be nice.

So today I am doing something about it. I am ending my life, and beginning another one.

I am disappearing. I will move away and leave everything behind. start a new life somewhere new. I have managed to save £1000 over the last couple of years. I can afford to rent a flat and start fresh. At least now I can truly be alone, instead of having to speak to my family everyday who really don’t give a shit but call all the time just because it is what they are supposed to do.

New name
New home
New me
Alone forever

This confession is from Secret Confessions - Last Day Of My Life… | Twitter Updates | 4 comments

Looking for a substitute

Sat, 04 Sep 2010 12:01:22 +0000

I started cutting when I was thirteen. Death of my brother.
I didn’t do it often or deep. I was actually using it at the time as a way to make myself look more depressed. Not really for outright attention. But for “behind my back” attention. I wanted people to wonder what was going on in my life.
I didn’t get the attention I wanted and stopped cutting for a while. About four months.
My scars were not severe, but I liked having them even if I was a little embarassed of them after I quit cutting.
As another attempt at attention, I carved “DIE” into my wrist. Quickly I was extremely ashamed of that, and cut more onto my wrist to hide the word. I felt like everyone could read it and continued to cut. Then I was worried how the cuts looked, and tried to cut them to look more random, like a cat or something was trying to grab at my wrist.
It stopped hurting pretty soon.
My friend saw it.
My grandmother saw it.
I told them it was my cat, and I’m sure neither believed me at the time.
I became more and more depressed.
People were forgetting my brother.
People were forgetting me.
I started to cut for myself when I was fifteen.
I thought for a while it meant I was stronger, because it didn’t hurt me, because other people don’t cut.
On my upper thigh, I have a large 7 or 8 inch long scar that’s raised up. Because I first started cutting there, and I would cut and re-cut the scar tissue.
It is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen.
After a while I couldn’t stomach watching myself and hearing myself cut my tissue.
I would go to bed, and just scratch a spot on my back. Slow and hard. And think about other things. Tell myself I was dreaming..
I have about ten or more scars on my back from that. Raised ugly scar tissue. I can’t go swimming.
I stopped that because I did a few on my neck, arms, etc without realizing it. Not as deep, because I was in public and stopped as soon as I noticed. But still slightly scarred.
When I was sixteen I moved back to my legs.. I never wear shorts. I cut into the back of my ankle while sitting. It hurt differently. Scars weren’t as deep while I was contemplating where my tendons were.
I sat cross legged, cut into the skin on my calves, anywhere I saw.
I sat in a hot bath, too hot for me. I cut, wondering if it would make me bleed more. More scars on my calves.
My brother doesn’t love me anymore.
I started loving my scars instead of anything else. I got excited to go home and make more. Add more. Have a pain throughout my day that I can put my mind to.
I made designs like stitches up the insides of my legs.
That took a long time, I did about four cuts a day.
All the way up both sides..
My lover, who had taken me for unknown reasons knew I cut, knew since we were thirteen. She tries to make me stop, every time.
She sees the stitches in my legs and throws up. She can’t handle it, or me.
I feel jealous that she can, because it makes me feel sick to think of the blades I used..
Always different edges, razors, steak knives, box cutters, anything sharp.
I tell her I’ll quit, in the midst of a panic attack, after asking her to commit suicide with me.
She doesn’t want to die with me.
I try to stop.
I sometimes pretend my cat caught me with a little scratch, she knows I’m lying, but she’s glad I’m trying.
Now I’m eighteen.
I’m not so depressed.
I feel sick when I think of cutting.
But I still want to every single day.
And I’m always looking for things to “accidentally” hurt myself on.
I’ve already stapled myself many times at work.
I’m just clumsy now…
I really do want to stop…
And I’m so sorry that I used my brother like this, and this is what has come of it.

This confession is from Secret Confessions - Looking for a substitute | Twitter Updates | One comment