Feeling alive is a big part of authentically being ourselves.  Everyone of us has something that makes us feel alive.

When I started writing this, Everything louder than Everything Else by Meatloaf from Bat Out of Hell II: Back into Hell
came on.  I love it when serendipity lends a helping hand.

If the thrill is gone then its time to take it back

I know that I will never be politically correct
And I don’t give a damn about my lack of etiquette
As far as I’m concerned the world could still be flat
And if the thrill is gone then its time to take it back
If the thrill is gone then its time to take it back
Who am i?
Why am I here?
Forget the questions someone get me another beer

It is so easy to get caught up in the big questions.  We get distracted from living in the search for purpose and meaning.  I know what you are thinking, didn’t say that we want meaning and purpose?  that those are prerequisites for happiness?

Yes!  But we will never find those things by sitting around trying to figure out what they are.

It is more important to live authentically than to be able to describe who you are in words.

It is more important to follow your bliss than to sit around trying to figure out why you are here?

While those are important questions, the answers are learned through action, and not thought.

You gotta learn to dance

Whats the meaning of life?
Whats the meaning of it all?
You gotta learn to dance
Before you learn to crawl
You gotta learn to dance
Before you learn to crawl

I experience by bliss and live in passion most profoundly when I:

• Am telling stories.
• Attending conventions.
• Listening to music.
• Dancing.
• Watching movies and series that matter to me.

I didn’t figure this out by sitting around and thinking about, but through doing it.

I started DMing AD&D in middle school.  I loved telling stories so much that I wrote my first novel in 8th grade, my second by 12th.  My third and fourth about 2 years apart.  I never would have learned how much I loved to tell stories if it wasn’t for AD&D and Vampire: The Masquerade.

I am mortally afraid of public speaking.  I never would have started this blog and our podcasts if Shore Leave hadn’t put me on a GLBT in Fandom panel, forcing me to do it.  I enjoyed it, and starting blogging and podcasting shortly there after.

The lesson is:  We discover our passions by doing things that make us feel alive.

If you are curious about something, try it.  If you enjoy it, keep doing it.

Army of the Night

So sign up, all you raw recruits
Throw away those designer suits
You got your weapons cocked, your targets in your sights
There’s a party raging, somewhere in the world
You gotta serve your country, gotta service your girl
You’re all enlisted in the army of the night

Consider this your draft notice!  Somewhere, someone is doing something that will enrich your life to a degree you cannot even imagine.

• Find it
• Figure out what about it you love
• Discover your passion
• Find ways to do more of it

Take it from someone who knows.  Authentic living is better than any other high.

I aint in it for…

And I ain’t in it for the power
And I ain’t in it for my health
I ain’t in it for the glory of anything at all
And I sure ain’t in it for the wealth
But I’m in it ‘til it’s over
And I just can’t stop
If you want to get it done, you have to do it yourself
And I like my music like I like my life
Everything louder than everything else

Always remember what you are doing it for.  It isn’t money or power or fame.  It is because your heart beats to the rhythm of that drum, and you have to keep the party going.

Life is for the living!  If we are not alive, we need to find that spark and ignite it again!

Acting our Age

They say I’m wild and I’m reckless
I should be acting my age
I’m an impressionable child
In a tumultuous world
And they say I’m at a difficult stage

But it seems to me to the contrary
Of all the crap they’re gonna put on the page
That a wasted youth is better by far
Then a wise and productive old age

I really truly believe that if we follow our bliss and live our passions, we have actually set ourselves in accord with the cosmos.  We are doing what we are here on this earth to do.

Everything in life is a challenge.  Are we going to move forward or move back.  If moving forward requires us to sell out who we are at our very core, then that is the wrong path.

A youthful spirit and a mature intellect are the most valuable tool we could have in life.  Don’t let anyone take them from you, and NEVER give them up!

The three I admire most…

If you want my views of history
Then there’s something you should know
The three men I admire most
Are Curly, Larry, Moe
Don’t worry about the future
Sooner or later it’s the past
If they say the thrill is gone then its time to take it back
If the thrill is gone then its time to take it back

Now that you have discovered your passion, see if you can find a couple people who make a living doing that and study how they do it.  Establish a plan, and work toward achieving it.

Everything louder than everything else

Now is the time to just sing along!

So sign up, all you raw recruits
Throw away those two bit suits
You got your weapons cocked, your targets in your sights
There’s a party raging, somewhere in the world
You gotta serve your country, gotta service your girl
Youre all inducted in the army of the night
And I aint in it for the power
And I aint in it for my health
I aint in it for the glory of anything at all
And I sure aint in it for the wealth
But Im in it til its over
And I just cant stop
If you want to get it done, you got to fight for yourself
And I like my music like I like my life
Everything louder than everything else

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Heinrich Zimmer once said, “The best things can’t be told; the second best are misunderstood; the third best have to do with history.” Now, the vocabulary through which the best things are told as second best is the vocabulary of history, but it doesn’t refer to history; it refers through this to the transcendent. Deities have to become, as one great German scholar said, “transparent to the transcendent.” The transcendent must show and shine through those deities. But it must shine through us, too, and through the spiritual things we are talking about. And as long as you keep pinning it down to concrete fact, and declare something isn’t true because it didn’t happen, you’re wrong. We don’t say that about fairy tales, and so we get the truth of them (Joseph Campbell, An Open Life).

I am quick to call upon the franchises I love for example of how life should be, or how we should act.  There is a reason:

Every story is a metaphor

Every episode, movie, book, and story we tell is a metaphor.  Once you learn to see that, everything will become clearer and richer.

Creative Writing “experts” like to think that the metaphors are create through proper execution of the craft.  What a load of bunk!

The truth is, nearly every sentence ever written or said is a metaphor.  There are layers of meaning hidden within them.  More often then not, these layers hide from originator of the sentence.  They are unconscious fears and desires manifesting themselves.

Every story has this secret in it.  Even really bad movies, episodes, and books reveal a lot about the fears and self-imposed limits the writer is coping with.

Find the music that moves you

Certain things resonate with us because they are speaking to us on an unconscious level.

• Momma Mia!
  showed me that I need to stop looking for myself in my past, and learn to enjoy my present.
• Were the World Mine
  taught me that we all need to learn how to see the world through the eyes of the people we don’t understand so we can find ways to relate to them.
• I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Star Trek, but I would be here forever if I tried to recount everything it taught me.

You need to find the metaphors that resonate with you, and discover the secret they are trying to share.

What tells your story?

What book, episode, series, movie, or song shares your story?  What was it?  Someone else might need to hear it.

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There comes a time when we have to give up on what we love.  The trick is giving up on the right things.

The Time has passed

I miss fanzines.

When I first got involved in fandom, I built a large collection of fanzines.  I got to know the editors by name, and knew I would love the zines certain editors put out, and not others.  Now, with the exception of slash zines, the remainder of fanfiction has gone online.

The days of the zine are behind us, but their might be a new way to take the form into the future.

Look toward the new

Instead of trapping ourselves in the thought of what could be brought back, ask yourself how you can reinvent it, and move forward on that.

What have you decided to give up on?

And what can you reinvent it into?

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I find myself thinking about the “Good Old Days” a lot lately.  This is not just a condition of thirty-somethings like me.  A surprising number of twenty-somethings I know are doing it to

Telling War Stories

There is some value in sitting around with your friends telling stories about our pasts.  It is how we come to know each other.

With increasing frequency, I have noticed that stories are not shared as memories, but as a wish for a return to our glory days.

Times Arrow

We are propelled forever into the future, writing ever more moments of our lives into the past.  Everything changes.  What is important is that we do not allow ourselves to become mired in the past.  We can learn from our past, but there is no known power in the cosmos that will allow us to return to a time already lived.

When a chapter closes, we have to turn the page and write the best words we can on the page.

The Best is yet to come

Believe me.  Several times, I have thought my best days were behind me.  The though enters all of our minds from time to time.  The fact is, it is easier to look back than it is to look forward.  We know the past.

Might I suggest we learn how to know the future.

• Plans help
• Goals motivate
• Hope enlivens

We have to find a way to have all three.  That is why I am thankful to Gene Roddenberry.  Star Trek gave me a vision of the future that is hard to strip away from my eyes.  The world I want to live in doesn’t exist yet.  I have too much work to do to waste time looking back.

How do you keep yourself looking forward?

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It isn’t hard to feel invisible in the world today.  So much is going on, and thanks to the internet, the conversation never stops.  It easier than ever to feel like no one sees us.

The trick is to ask yourself:

How do I want to be seen?

I don’t think there is a more important question we could ask ourselves.  Despite what people say, there is nothing we can do to make people notice us.  All we can control is how people see us if they stumble upon us.

Some people call this personal branding… I hate that term.  I am not a Coke!  I have a reputation not a brand!

Authentically Me

I love to see how people react to me when they first meet me.  I am an open book, and many have learned at their own peril not to ask me questions they don’t want me to answer honestly.

You see, in 1997, I lost everything.  My three best friends turned their back on me…

One of them, stole my identity, my college fund, got me evicted from my house, turned my other friends against me, and didn’t even understand how that could have upset me.  I was devastated.  My life in rumble around me, I learned the most important lesson of my life: Never lie to anyone!

I invested years in a relationship with a person who had no intention of being my friend.  He only wanted to use me to make his life better, screw the consequences.

I decided right then and there to be honest with everyone I meet.  No games, no lies.  If people don’t like me for who I am, then they are not the people I need to have around me.  In return, I ask one thing of the people in my life:

Never Lie to me

Trust is a two way road.  I am willing to bear my soul and be authentically who I am at all times, the very least I can expect in return from other people is that they will never lie to me.

I tell people that.  “I consider you a friend now.  I have been honest with you, and I expect you to do the same.  If I ever find out you have lied to me from this point on, I am not sure I can remain friends with you.”

Yeah, it is a little blunt, but that is how I am.  I don’t expect everyone to be as open as I am, but I expect them to be honest in their dealings with me.

Stop worrying about being noticed

It is far more important to consider what people see when you are noticed.  If you are a decent person, they will spread the word.  The truth will always win out.

How do you see your relationships with others?

Do you think there are any other traits besides honesty and authenticity we should expect from each other?

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The tension between fame and a meaningful life is strong.  It is easy to confuse one for the other.  This struggle is more acute for an Entertainment designer since we are a nation (and culture) built on the idea the winner takes all.

Anytime a show is not number one, it is deemed a failure by the tabloid press.  Think about some common statements of defeat:

• I wasn’t picked to lead the team.
• They didn’t like my idea.
• Only a few people showed up for my party.
• Only one person wished me happy birthday.
• I didn’t show up, and nobody even noticed.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again:

Quality is more important than Quantity.

I know, that is such a cliche, but it is true!

If you weren’t picked to lead the team, be grateful you are free from the stress of leadership and participate to the best of your ability.

If they don’t like your ideas, ask yourself if you pitched them to the right people, or if they need some tweaking and improvement.
Who cares if only a few people show up for the party, did you all have a good time?

I am not saying that we have to always look for a bright side in every situation.  Sometimes their just isn’t one.  What we need to do is:

1. Identify our Real Obstacles

It is easy to feel sorry for ourselves and have the ‘Poor me’s, but that doesn’t help anyone but the people and things between us and our goals.  If we don’t know what we are really up against, we cannot make a plan to overcome the obstacle and move ahead.
Just don’t forget, sometimes we have to make a turn and go off in a new direction.  That’s what innovation is.

2. Find the Path

Once you see the obstacle, next you need to figure our the way around, through, or over it.

I have a superstition about the path I follow.  When I am on the right track, I have the motivation to carry my through.  When I am not, I don’t.

The real objective is to have a life that makes a feel alive, not merely one we survive as long as we can.

My dad is most alive when he is fixing things.  It would be ludicrous for him to have worked his way into management.  It would have sapped the zeal of life from him.  He followed his bliss, and still does in retirement.

The easiest way to find your path is to help others to find theirs.  That is why I am always volunteering to help people out.  A lot times, the solution to my problems is the same as theirs, and it easier for me to see without the emotional attachment I have to my own.

3. Stay on the Path

Remember, the most important thing is to follow your bliss!

Passion really does equal life.  The more passionate we are about our life, the more we feel alive.  The real trick is not loosing site of the things that make us feel alive.

Your turn

What tricks do you use to identify and overcome the obstacles in your life?  How did you find your bliss and what are you doing to keep following it?

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Community is a base essential.  Even loners like to pride themselves on being part of a proud tradition of mavericks.  We all want to belong.  The question is: Belong to what?

There are two schools of thought:

1. Belong to something popular
2. Belong to something meaningful

Often, we feel like we have to choose one or the other.

Belonging to something Popular

The easiest choice to make to sign up for what your friends are doing.  I read a lot of blogs that discuss techniques bloggers can use to create this sort of peer pressure among your readers to bring their friends in.  The whole Web 2.0 phenomenon centered around this idea.

• All my friends are on My Space, so I should be on My Space
• Now the majority of my friends are on Facebook, I suppose I should join that.
• Wow, all these people I want to keep up with are on Twitter.  I guess I need to join that

On and on it goes.  Each of these sites give us metrics to make us feel popular: Friends/Followers/Subscribers.

The problem with fame is that the more you have (real or imagined) the more you want.  It is a drug.  Social acceptance is the souls most addictive narcotic.  Like with any addiction.  Our priorities start changing.

My breaking point came when I was promoting Shine Like Thunder.  At one point, I was “participating” in 19 separate social networks on a weekly basis, and 7 more every other week.  Add that to my blogging, podcasting, and I didn’t have any time left to write…  You know, the reason I started this mess to begin with.  I had contact with a lot more people, but made few friends.
I was hooked on the drug.  I fed the addiction while letting my passions wither.

Belonging to something Meaningful

All I really want, and I think all any of us really want is the sense that we are a part of something meaningful.

A meaningful community feeds us with enthusiasm and purpose.  That is the cost of popularity.

My favorite band, Kiss, and my favorite show on TV right now, Glee, understand this.  They preach and practice the celebration of difference.  We need to do that too!

Personal Checklist

I realized that in my personal life I need to ask myself some basic questions:

1. What am I doing that fills my life with a sense of purpose and meaning?
2. How can I better connect with people to make friends and not just followers.

Social Checklist

And on a broader field:

1. How can I push the social networks I belong to work together better?
2. How can I be more social and less promotional and vain?
3. What can I do to fill my own life with more meaning and purpose?

I am still working on answers to these questions, and I am sure I missed quite a few that should be on the list.  What did I miss?  Do you have any suggestions?

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The future of decabling is in trouble:

“I think a free model is a very difficult way to capture the value of our content. I think what we need to do is deliver that content to consumers in a way where they will appreciate the value,” Carey said. “Hulu concurs with that, it needs to evolve to have a meaningful subscription model as part of its business.”

To be clear, Carey is saying that much of the site’s content should remain free. Any paid content should add value for users and revenue for broadcasters, he explained — unlike some proposed “TV Everywhere” authentication schemes which give the same content through a different venue. Hulu premium products could include exclusives, previews, shortened windows, mobile and behind-the-scenes content ( New TeeVee).

Before I start freaking out, if they are going to charge for premium content, I don’t have that much trouble with this.

The honest answer is, Murdock and the Mouse want to charge for all this content.  They see the end of the Television model where free, commercial based content is delivered into viewers homes and they do not want to have it replaced with another commercial based model.

If they had their way, they would charge for access and run the commercials too.

I really hope they are only talking about charging for premium content, but I seriously doubt it.

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Trivium set up a site where you can download live recordings of their concerts at live.trivium.com.  Each concert sells for $10.

Great idea!  I am not sure about the price though.  If they sold them for $5 more people would snap them up.  I am curious to see how this works.

Would you buy live recordings of your favorite band?  I know I have.

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I was initially intrigued when I saw a post on Sci Fi Wire by Wil McCarthy called: Is Mysticism overtaking science in sci-fi?

It sounded interesting, and I really wanted to discuss the question until I saw the Movies they decided to pick on:

• Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
• Paranormal Activity
• 9
• Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince
• 2012

Wait, wait, what?  They picked a:

• Kid’s Movie
• Horror Movie
• Fantasy Movie
• Fantasy Movie
• Disaster/Supernatural Horror Movie

They didn’t list a single science fiction or sci-fi movie!!

The closest they came is maybe Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, but that is like comparing Spy Kids to a James Bond movie.

Fantasy and Horror are genres that change something about the nature of the world to affect their Fantasy or Horror.  That is the nature of these genres.  Asking them to be scientifically accurate is to ask them to stop existing.

(sigh)  I hope Sci Fi Wire would at the very least go to Wikipedia, and learn a little something about genre before they lose all their credibility on the issue…

How embarrassing!

If you would like to discuss Whether Mysticism is overtaking science in Sci fi, leave a comment below and let’s get the conversation started.

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