Secret Message Pen

Case closed

2007-05-28T13:02:00.000-07:00

All things considered, it was pretty epic.

Let's just see that one more time . . .

. . . proving that all you really need in life is a great jacket and the love of a good woman, plus the occasional crane shot.

Shamus Life?

2007-02-21T23:43:00.000-08:00

Did that My Little Pony tattoo say "Shamus Life"?

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!!

2007-02-20T21:59:00.000-08:00

That's more like it. If this season were Star Wars, the episodes up to this one would have been all about the droids wandering around on Tatooine, jawas, Luke bitching with and about his aunt and uncle, etc. Then, in this episode, you have everything from meeting Ben Kenobi up through his death and the escape from the Death Star. It makes for a pretty good hour of television, even if it's unsustainable and the buildup is sometimes tedious.

You know, LoPa is fine with me (although it sounds more like Neptune's hot new date-rape drug than a relationship nickname). Ninety percent of the best parts of the LoVe interaction were Logan's lines and Jason Dohring's line readings. They could spin-off the character in a show called Logan Flirts with Potted Plants and it would probably be more entertaining than anything else on The CW (not that I would know, since I've never watched any other CW show, ever).

Poor Lamb. I'll miss him.

I wondered when they were going to play the Creutzfeldt-Jakob card. So predictable.

Best line: "Will I be returned in my current pristine condition?"

I Heart Dick

2007-02-14T20:47:00.000-08:00

Ah, in its own odd way, a Valentine's Day T-shirt slogan worthy of the man himself. Dick had some really great moments in last night's episode. My favorite was at the beginning, when he described the chick he wanted to hook up with as "(sung) HO-O-O-O-O-O-O-OT!(/sung) Like, I might have to use an oven mitt to feel her up." That just made me giggle.

And MWR--you haven't heard anybody say, "Can we be done?" before? Maybe you just don't hang out with D/dick-ish enough people. How am I not encountering these phrases? I'd never heard "not so much" either before it showed up in "An Echolls Family Christmas". Later, syp let me know that it did not originate with that episode.

Sunnydale vs. Neptune

2007-02-14T00:08:00.000-08:00

Sunnydale
Drink of choice: blood
Leading cause of death: disintegration
Number two: exsanguination
Mystery occurrence: sister appears
Payback: curse; flaying
Teen ailment: lycanthropy
Protagonist's father: absent
Authority figure: serpentine mayor
Breakfast of Champions: Weetabix and blood

Neptune
Drink of choice: drugged beverage
Leading cause of death: murder
Number two: vehicle plunge
Mystery occurrence: animal disappears
Payback: beating; flagpoling
Teen ailment: chlamydia
Protagonist's father: everpresent
Authority figure: asinine sheriff
Breakfast of Champions: Weetabix and GHB

There has to be morning-after quarterbacking

2007-02-11T13:24:00.000-08:00

I'm sure I don't have to express how silly I think this little drama is. A number of the letters make the provocative point that Veronica Mars is a TV show.

The rule is pretty simple: anytime there is a popular depiction or article about something you know a lot about, it will be inaccurate in various ways.

Tisk Tisk

2007-02-09T18:38:00.000-08:00

Oh my stars, this episode was the most frustrating ever. I completely blame the Seattle Times reporter and their unwitting free advertisement for the "we're not YouTube" proposal. I do have a heart and think the effort Matthew Broderick went to propose to pony-tail girl is sweet and they will have this memory to share for ever and ever - but so will I and I'm thinking: GROSS. It was a commercial pure and simple. Frankly the only commercials that should be "news" are award winners or the Super Bowl lists. Grrr.

The newspaper teaser made me think that something miraculous was going to occur on VM - like they were going to let Wallace or Mac (who just finished shooting a movie - go girl!) have a scene or V wasn't going to completely PISS ME OFF for like the 900th time. Admit it: you were wondering, just a little, whether Logan was going to cut the Gordian Knot, bend a knee and deliver a very Loganesque marriage proposal.

I must confess that I am a voice message skipper. So dear one's if it's important, don't ramble and get to the point.

Again, I say Dick is marvelous in his shallowness. Someday, he and V will hook up in some bizzaro world episode and it will creep us out, but it will also be a little fun. I may try to add "Can we be done?" to my repertory.

Anger is the path to the Dark Side . . .

2007-02-06T21:31:00.000-08:00

. . . so don't get me started on missing characters. A process of elimination suggests that Percy Daggs III is filming a new Peter Jackson epic somewhere antipodal.

O.K., no more Battlestar Galactica shout-outs without also having Madison enter V's mind and interact with her, in the manner of the Baltar / Caprica Six relationship.

(Did I mention this would be stream of consciousness?)

Anyway, what a shock, the promo was just blatantly misleading. As noted, I hate that.

Earlier today, I read this in the Seattle Times:

Watch "Veronica Mars" for an early Valentine treat!

Sorry to be cryptic here, but you don't want to skip tonight's episode of The CW's "Veronica Mars." 9 p.m., KSTW/11. Trust me.

And don't take any bathroom breaks. Got it?

You'll understand what I mean by 10.

Should I be concerned that my response to the alleged "treat"^*—spoken in the direction of the TV—ran, in its entirety, like this: "Who f*cking cares?! Are you serious?!"? Or is it just a Mars/Venus thing combined with the pointless buildup?

Oh, I guess it is actually fear that is the path to the Dark Side. However, fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate, of course, leads to suffering. Not listening to your voicemail in its entirety figures in there somewhere.
_____________________
^* a video marriage proposal from the mutant hybrid of John Ritter and Jonathan Silverman (a neat CGI trick, I'll grant you). That the hybird's name is actually "Rand Fishkin" is just the icing on the cake. Her reaction is very cute. Reminded me a bit of Anna Paquin's Oscar speech.

Quit messing around!

2007-02-06T12:54:00.000-08:00

Of course she won't be pregnant. Either the promo snip was out of context and thus deliberately misleading (hate that) or the plot will involve some kind of fraudulent pregnancy / "Plan B" mill.

A record?

2007-02-01T00:32:00.000-08:00

Did this week's episode, "Poughkeepsie, Tramps and Thieves," have the most MIA cast members ever? Wallace, Piz, Mac, Parker, Dick. Plus, Weevil seems to have been reduced to a narrative device.

A short imagined dialogue on the theme of "Will they ever learn?"

2007-01-24T23:30:00.000-08:00

V: "Logan, sweetums, I was just post-coitally wondering, apropos of nothing, whether you are perfect."

L: "Um . . . Yes I am, sugarplum."

Veronica Mars and the Case of the Missing Animal

2007-01-24T14:48:00.000-08:00

Seriously, how many have there been? Is it possible that this was only the third? It feels like there have been a lot.

Hank???

2007-01-23T21:58:00.000-08:00

Professor Landry may be many things, but he does not strike me as a "Hank". "Hank Landry . . . put 'er there!" Nope, not doing anything for me. Query: Is anyone actually named "Hank"?

I know it was rhetorical, but Hank Aaron and the King of the Hill's Hank come to mind. I do concur that it is a very 1940's sounding name similar to Milton or Edwin. (Milton was my grandpa's name so careful what you dis.)

Henry Landry is not a good name either, and I like the name Henry. You just can't put two "y" names together like that. You do that, you might end up having to call your kid "Hank", and no one wants that.

Are they just going to keep whipsawing this LoVe thing indefinitely? It gets tiresome. "Oh, Logan, I'll never get past this . . . you've done something unforgivable, etc." It would really help Veronica's character development if she were to do something nominally unforgivable.

I totally agree, while I do love it when the kids get together I'd like to see them do something more than whine at each other. What about them against the world for pete sake!? They could run off in search of the Arc of the Covenant or some dang thing. The breaking up is getting old.

I suppose they'll still be getting her together with Piz at some point. It seems inevitable.

Gotta love Dick: "The theme of my essay is how your character . . . by the Veronica Mars character."

Lastly, I'm wondering "Where's Wallace?" and how come the people at my college weren't as pretty as EVERYONE at Neptune U. Even the science geeks are totally hot. Believe you me, there were some fugly people at my college.

Couch Baron interview with Rob Thomas

2007-01-21T21:45:00.000-08:00

The headline kind of says it all.

Couch Baron interview with Rob Thomas

Friday Night Lights

2007-01-10T23:31:00.000-08:00

Man, Friday Night Lights is a great show!

All MotW, all the time?

2006-12-31T15:52:00.000-08:00

They are considering getting rid of the big mysteries and sticking to MotW mysteries. I'm not necessarily against that, but they would really need to improve the quality and noir-ness of the MotW plots. As I've said before, they should consider giving Veronica a nemesis worthy of the name—someone like Luther Mahoney on Homicide: Life on the Street.

Triumph and confusion

2006-11-28T21:57:00.000-08:00

My pleasure at having correctly identified every single person involved in rapes or staged "rapes," without fingering anyone blameless, is diminished slightly by confusion about the Mexican arson alibi Logan provided for Mercer. Are we to assume that he was only in Mexico during one of the Lilith House "rapes"?

I eat crow and bow to you MWR who will now be known as "Rapist Spotter!" I wouldn't put it on a t-shirt or anything, but we'll know how special you are.

As much as I LoVe it when my favorite people get together I was happy to see Logan (whom I want to be my new nude housekeeper - TMI?) kick Veronica to the curb. It was a nice display of emotion from Logan. V of course is dead inside and instead of even offering up a weak "I'm sorry" she just stands there!? Grrr... I hate the standard shower crying scene - everyone who hides their true emotions to the outside world knows the best place to cry is in the car with Air Supply blasting.

Regarding the Logan/Mercer alibi I am of the opinion that their Mexican flaming motel incident occurred during one of the "fake rapes" which took him out of the running for Big Rapist on Campus - or so it seemed... daan da daaaa.

So far this season the only character that still has that ol' Neptune High charm is Dick. Lord love him, he's smarmy, he's a little evil, and he takes no crap from Veronica McJump-to-conclusions. He's getting the best lines this season.

The crying in the shower thing was so contrived. I was yelling at the TV that she had no right to cry because she'd treated Logan like dirt, and it's a miracle he didn't dump her sooner. Congrats to Logan for being very mature.

I also bow to MWR's superior wisdom. Moe was in on it. And boy is he Mercer's whipping boy!

I assume now that we are on holiday hiatus? Guess this means I can finally catch up on House.

Something is seriously wrong with the dynamic of the show

2006-11-25T01:07:00.000-08:00

Last week's episode, "Lord of the Pi's", nicely illustrates what I think are significant structural problems with the show. Normally, I might start by criticizing the writers for the "greengrocer's apostrophe" in the title, but here I can understand their reasoning. It does remind me that I dislike all the episode titles that are feeble, inapposite plays on literary or pop-culture titles. In order to pull that off, the episode really should have something to do with a theme of the referenced work. If you want a clinic in episode titles, I suggest the original Star Trek. Now those were episode titles.

Anyway, I'm increasingly convinced that something is really wrong with the dynamic of the show. All the characters exist like little separate particles that occasionally bump into each other. As we've observed and bemoaned, multiple title-credited characters are absent from any given episode. Sometimes, when they do appear, it has the feel of complying with a contractual obligation or union rule of some sort. Lately, it seems like the writers have not just favored Veronica with plenty of fresh kills and her customary lion's share of the good lines—they have been actively running off the hyenas and vultures as well. When did Logan last have a memorable funny line? Has Weevil even been in two episodes? Served as anything more than a handy combination of red herring and passkey?

So that's kind of a problem. But maybe it's a really a symptom of a larger problem. Screen time is a zero-sum game, and this season more of it seems to be going to Keith than in the past. Normally, when you go to college, the parental contact drops off significantly. Not for Veronica. I think Rob Thomas and others have acknowledged that Keith's role and the Veronica-Keith dynamic were being emphasized this season because it's such a special relationship or whatever. Or, more likely, because parent-child banter is supposed to be what the Gilmore Girls viewers like to see. Unfortunately, the writers have beefed up Keith's role by just adding more of the little daddy-daughter interactions they think everyone loves. But a little goes a long way. That "full of information" bit last week was about the most painful daddy-daughter filler we've seen in 2-1/2 years. If anything, the Veronica-Keith relationship is less complex now than it has ever been.

Instead of manufacturing conflicts du jour between Veronica and Logan, how about setting up some believable ones centering on some of Keith's less attractive qualities? I cringed when he came running out and said "Maybe you'd better stop shouting at my daughter!" Logan handled it better than I would have. Now that Veronica is an adult, Keith needs to mellow out, or she needs to break away more, or both. And now that Veronica is in college, she needs to mellow out about whom Keith is involved with. She's never been keen on anyone he's dated (neutral, maybe, about Alicia), and I start to wonder if she even wants her father to be happy. Anyway, both of them need to learn to mind their own business a little more. Less screen time for Keith would help. I would be happy to have seen Keith as much as I've seen, say, Weevil and Mac combined so far this season.

Another problem that cuts across character and plot issues is that—either in Veronica's mind or objectively—no one is good enough for Veronica. Among the main characters, maybe Mac and Wallace are, if we could ever see them. But who else? And the adversaries, except, perhaps, the faceless rapist, aren't worthy of her. In the past, we've had Wiedman and a few others, but this season it's been like watching Sherlock Holmes nabbing pickpockets. Veronica needs her Moriarty. It would be nice to have some known malefactor who has the upper hand for multiple episodes, getting away with things that Veronica can't prove he/she did before eventually receiving a comeuppance. Think Luther Mahoney in Homicide.

Finally, both Veronica and Keith need to lose one now and then. Yes, Keith did blithely chauffeur Kendall's killer to her doorstep. Yes, Veronica could have stopped Parker's rape under some recrimination-based ex post theory, but, basically, Veronica and Keith always get their man. They always win in the end. The mysteries of the week are such inconsequential fluff anyway that it would be refreshing if sometimes it didn't all work out so neatly. I once read an interview with Roy Huggins, creator of The Rockford Files, who said it took a season or more to work out the right balance among the "up" and "down" episodes. Of course, Jim Rockford mostly came out ahead in the end, but many of his victories were, if not pyrrhic, at least unsatisfying in some way. He solves the case, but someone else gets the girl, or he loses the "Goodhew" detective award on a recount, or whatever. And, of course, he never managed to move out of the trailer. The main bad consequences Veronica ever suffers are to her relations with others. She makes enemies and burns bridges, but none of that ever seems to come back and bite her. Sometimes it nips her, maybe.

Maybe they are setting Veronica up for some bigger fall. She's kind of a mess. Her instincts have become so cynical that they've been leading her astray. She wears her unwillingness to change or adapt like a badge of honor. But I doubt they are going to lay Veronica really low, and there are fewer opportunities to do so than some shows have (as Buffy sang, "Hey I've died twice").

Yes to everything above. MWR and I were conversing on email about the lack of chemistry between the actors this season. And we know the actors have chemistry together; can we say Seasons 1 and 2? The show is just not working for me right now. I keep watching, because I remember Season 1 and how amazing it was. But I am coming really close to re-prioritizing my Tivo to "House", which has apparently been fantastic this year.

Veronica lacks passion
Logan lacks mirth
Mac lacks screen time
Wallace seems to have lost his BFF status
Keith is overbearing
Weevil doing an honest days work is just wrong -- he is a gang member for godsakes.

Here is an idea: how about an episode that centers around all the supporting characters who aren't getting any screen time with zero appearnces by Veronica. We can send her off for an FBI internship interview or something.

"She wears her unwillingness to change or adapt like a badge of honor." Exactly. She's getting on my nerves, too. There's a big difference between being a little prickly and overdefensive and afraid to let people in and just plain old being a jerk. Funny, I would normally think of that term as applying to men (like dick and prick--which wouldn't be that far off at characterizing her behavior here, either), but can't think of a good female equivalent. Bitch doesn't quite seem to fit. In any case, she's treating Logan like CRAP and it's pissing me off.

It occurs to me that at this point last season I was also feeling some frustration with structure and pacing, thinking they were dropping too many red herrings and making the mystery too complicated (and sending Wallace off to Chicago for what, six weeks or something? That was never explained well enough for me). They managed to bring it all around at the end, but they left more stuff hanging than in the first season (like, whatever was the deal with Cliff's briefcase? Talk about your SMPs). It looks like we'll be seeing Mac again next week, and also like Veronica might be getting some of the overconfidence (prickishness?) knocked out of her. So who's going to die?

Perhaps, the end of the beginning?

2006-11-21T01:00:00.000-08:00

Oh, it's Patty Hearst on Tuesday. Here is a quick Venn diagram illustrating how the CW's target demographic (A) intersects with the group of people who know about Patty Hearst and her story (B):

Now that the full episode order for the show appears to be 20 instead of 22, they'd better get cracking on those two other mysteries. This had better be Mystery No. 1 Payoff Episode. Who would have thought they would spend this much time on the rape mystery? I thought it was just going to be a little palate-cleanser of a mystery.

It might be a spoiler to learn that Hearst plays a _________. I wonder if a _________ would be involved in a pivotal episode if either of my suspects were guilty . . . but if a certain other character were guilty, then maybe a _________ would get involved somehow.

By the way, some of you basically never post. Just thought I'd throw that out there. No pressure.

Eegad I am so phenomenally annoyed at Veronica. I told MWR recently that what was bugging me most about this season is how much I find I really don't like Veronica. Poor Logan. The thought actually went through my head, "Gee, Veronica really doesn't deserve a guy like Logan." For shame.

Unresolved question from last night -- Parker was in on the fake rapes? I didn't think she was connected with the feminists.

I sound like a broken record, but WHERE THE HELL IS MAC?!

I thought the Patty Hearst casting was amsuing. "Patty Hearst, heiress"; "Selma Hearst Rose, heiress." However, I am probably one of the few viewers in the right age demographic to get the joke. I would have been much more amused at the casting of Patty Hearst if she'd been any good. Man, was she wooden.

Best line from this Simpsons fan: "Brant is the Waylon Smithers to Rose's Mr. Burns."

Last chance

2006-11-20T17:25:00.000-08:00

Well, I hope I'm right and it's your last chance to register your predictions. Because I'm definitely ready to move on to some other mystery that might involve more of the credited actors appearing on screen together. I have to think that the last-minute introduction of the dean into the mix was another red herring, mostly because the washed-up-adult-star-as-villain angle has been done twice in two seasons. I have two suspects:

Nish and collaborators from Lilith House - She's a jerk we've been conditioned to dislike. This theory explains the lack of forensic evidence, Claire's "rape" and why Veronica was targeted in a departure from the normal M.O. Motive would be to apply pressure on frats, the Lampoon, Veronica and other instruments and abettors of male oppression. The Claire "rape" targeted the Lampoon people who had crossed Nish, and also conveniently provided Nish with an alibi. The attack on Veronica came after she had crossed and been threatened by Nish.

That floor proctor guy - He's odd, offers people tea at the drop of a hat and has keys to all the rooms. He was in a position to intercept Parker.

No fair picking two, so I'm going to go with Nish.

Art imitates life

2006-11-14T14:43:00.000-08:00

The Rise and Fall of the "Bus Plunge" Story

Spotted in downtown Seattle

2006-11-05T00:09:00.000-08:00

Friday Night Lights

2006-11-03T00:04:00.000-08:00

This is an amazingly good show. Totally different from VM, of course, but so far this year, episode-for-episode, it's been the best thing on TV.

Last Night's Missing Cast Members

2006-11-01T12:02:00.000-08:00

So last night we got Wallace back; Piz was elsewhere as was Dick, and Mac has been MIA for, what, three weeks? But hey, we had an appearance by Backup, which as this dog lover will tell you, is always a treat. Good to see Wallace, but was he even in any scenes with his BFF? Seeing an email from him ("Snickerdoodleme?") isn't quite the same as actual interaction. I wonder if the three-mysteries structure isn't stretching the show a little thin on quality interactions among the main characters.

Best part of the episode was the opening wherein Weevil is addressing Veronica's class. Proof that Francis Capra gets good dialogue and is one of the better actors on the show. I think he and Enrico Colantoni rank at the tops for acting ability on VM. Not that the others aren't good, it's just these two stand out to me. Drywall dust notwithstanding, I thought it was out of character for V to immediately conclude Weevil did it. I need to watch the heist scene again, but it seemed that the necklace thief was obviously taller than Weevil.

Really really can't stand Ed Begley, Jr. I can't tell if it's the character, the writing, the directing, or the acting, but every scene he is in is just painful to watch. I felt like the whole B plot would normally have involved one-off random clients, but they had some contractual need to have EBJ in the episode. I could be wrong and what we have learned about him may pertain to something that happens later, but I'm not expecting that to happen.

And up next week, the long dreaded, but must happen Logan and Veronica have relationship troubles episode. I hope they can manage to have the conflict not seem forced, as some of their problems this season have struck me. I think whatever happened would seem less forced if we could just see a bit more of them in normal interactions, hanging with a group of friends, etc. We haven't seen them together enough yet to have them credibly pulled apart.

"I DO IT ALL FOR YOU, MULDER!"

2006-10-27T00:40:00.000-07:00

Awww, come on, guys, throw me a few scraps. Don't you want to be able to tell people you have a blog? Or even two blogs? Of course, I'm always only ever kidding, but as a certain contributor can tell you, I've been always only ever kidding since fifth grade or before, and it does start to wear on you after a while. So, save yourselves!

I note that one of you now has a link on her blog entitled "Geeks Commenting on Veronica Mars." And then you click the link and come over here and practically the entire thing seems to be written by me. OUCH! What do you suppose her many friends and relatives must be thinking now?—to say nothing of her new pals throughout the Guest Services hierarchy at Best Western International Hotels! I'll tell you what they think: "I wonder if tp_gal knows about the typo in her sidebar."

Oh, look, here's a song download from a group called The Annabel Chongs. Oh, my goodness, it's called "Veronica Mars". I'm not wild about the song, but I think I'll post the link anyway because, to paraphrase Griffin Mill, "It's Veronica Mars."

By the way, did anyone notice that Michael Tolkin has come out with a sequel to The Player? I actually read the novel The Player (indeed, it might have been one of the last contemporary novels I read, which isn't saying much) and decided the film was much, much better. So, no sequel for me.

See how easy