Self Help 4 Life

Being an Empowered Woman (expanded)

2014-06-14T15:38:00.003-07:00

**Due to a technical issue, our prior article titled Being an Empowered Woman did not post in it's entirety. We are re-posting to make sure that all of the important information is shared to our readers. We apologize for this issue and hope that it is a rare - if not a one time - problem. Thank you for being here!**

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Given the history of my life and my current circumstances, I had to take a realistic view of who I have been and who I am now. I have been asking myself what being a strong, empowered woman means to me. After much thought, and I mean 2 years of thought, I have arrived at an answer. I simply give myself the right to be human, to have an opinion, to know that what I say and do matters, to love and be loved, to have feelings and know that feelings are neither right nor wrong but know that I have the control and the right to make the best possible decisions I can. As human s, we all have the right to be empowered but as a woman…we have to let our strength flow out of us and command ourselves. The fact is that we are not as physically strong as males (as most males that is). Our strength does not include portraying itself by brute force but only by peace, endurance, patience, kindness, and love. Of course, that list is not complete. There is much inner peace and behavior that shows an empowered woman.

Inner strength pours outward. When we have inner peace it is apparent in our behavior. I have numerous personal examples to share so I will contain my feelings of excitement and I will only include four to use as examples in this blog (note that I have a feeling but I have the control to make a decision…pretty great, right?).

Event	Feeling	Decision 1	Decision 2
Husband put GPS tracker in my car	Fear	Do nothing and keep on living without any changes	Find tracker and throw it out and get out of the situation.
Husband tells me, “it’s all in your head,” when I say how I feel or ask a question	Confusion	Cry, yell, and withdraw within myself	Stand up for myself. Say in a steady commanding voice, “I am not, “ and walk away or just walk away
Friend asks me to cover her hours at work and I know I really can’t	Obligated, stressed	Look at my schedule and try to juggle, rearrange, put my own priorities on the back burner	Politely say,” No, I can’t this time.”
Stuck in traffic when I am trying to get to work on time	annoyed	Complain, swear, stare out the window trying to see what is going on constantly, throw my hands up	Pray that everyone is safe if there is an accident, be thankful you and your loved ones are safe, listen to the radio.

I have the power to make a decision and my decision means something. It can change the unwanted feelings into feelings that actually makes me feel good. We have the power to make choices to change the situations that we are in! On the chart above, the situations that I included are situations that have repeatedly occurred in my life. The feelings that occurred during the situations also reoccurred. The feelings reoccurred until I changed myself by choosing a different behavior. If you ever heard someone say, “You can’t change others but you can change what you do or own behavior,” …well, what I am explaining to you know essential tells you what that is all about. It sounds so simple so how can this really be when life feels and appears to be so complicated? I had a pattern of behavior where I would choose decision 1 on the chart. After many years of engaging in the behaviors of decision 1, I started to think to myself, “Wait a minute, I have experienced many events in my life some that made me feel happy and some that made me feel unwanted emotions such as fear and intense sadness.” I have learned that how I react to the feelings will determine the outcomes of future events. When I chose decision 1, there were no positive uplifting changes in my life. I felt worthless, sad, upset, and trapped. When I chose to take charge of my own behaviors and choose decision 2, I had a revelation...YES! I am a strong and empowered woman. I am not worthless. My feelings and actions do matter. I can choose to continue on with my same behaviors that only make me feel worse or I can choose to make decisions that uplift me and in turn will uplift others. Well, the part uplifting yourself and uplifting others is discussion that will have to wait for another day. Below is a 3 step process that has helped me. I am sure that the process is not a new process but it is explained in my own words and own understanding that I have gained through my own experiences.

When an event occurs, identify what you are feeling.
Stop and think about the choices or decisions you have.
Make a good decision that uplifts yourself and, in turn, others will be uplifted too.

“God made man’s simple; man’s complex problems are of his own devising” (Eccles. 7:39, Jerusalem Bible)

I am not a professional counselor or a licensed professional. This blog is about my experiences in the hope that my experiences can help others.

Thank you. Peace be with you.

Dawn Tedwill

Being an Empowered Woman

2014-03-27T09:48:00.002-07:00

On being an empowered, strong woman: I have been asking what this means to me. I have arrived at answer. I simply give myself the right to be human, to have an opinion, to know that what I say and do matters, to love and be loved, to have feelings and know that feelings are neither right nor wrong but know that I have the control and the right to make the best possible decisions I can. As human s, we all have the right to be empowered but as a woman…we have to let our strength flow out of us and command ourselves. The fact is that we are not as physically strong as males (as most males that is). Our strength does not include portraying itself by brute force but only by peace, endurance, patience, kindness, and love. Of course, that list is not complete. There is much inner peace and behavior that shows an empowered woman.

Inner strength pours outward. When we have inner peace it is apparent in our behavior. I have numerous personal examples to share so I will contain my feelings of excitement and I will only include a select few to write about in this blog (note that I have a feeling but I have the control to make a decision…pretty great, right?).

Event	Feeling	Reaction 1	Reaction 2
Husband put GPS tracker in my car	Fear	Do nothing and live in fear	Find tracker and throw it out and get out of the situation.
Husband tells me, “it’s all in your head,” when I say how I feel or ask a question	Confusion	Cry, yell, and withdraw within myself	Stand up for myself. Say in a steady commanding voice, “I am not, “ and walk away.
Friend asks me to cover her hours at work and I know I really can’t	Obligated, stressed	Look at my schedule and try to juggle, rearrange, put my own priorities on the back burner	Politely say,” No, I can’t this time.”
Stuck in traffic when I am trying to get to work on time	annoyed	Complain, swear, stare out the window trying to see what is going on constantly, throw my hands up	Pray that everyone is safe if there is an accident, be thankful you and your loved ones are safe, listen to the radio.

Author Dawn Tedwill

Evolution - On Every Plain

2014-01-16T11:37:00.000-08:00

Humanity exists because we adapt. We evolve and expand our beliefs, understanding and our concepts of the universe. Combining survival skills with knowledge gained and wrapped in understanding, we have moved ourselves higher and higher on Life's ladder. However, some of us have evolved more than others and, sadly, the number of "others" have grown substantially greater than the "some".

To experience true growth, evolution must be attained on every level. Body, Mind, Soul, Spirit and Energy. Here are what I have come to grasp as the definition of these plains.

Physical – the vessel of this existence

Mind – is a tool for gathering knowledge

Soul – is the true Self

Spirit – is individual energy

Energy – is the driving force of all things, universal

Most who have come before and for most living today and that will come tomorrow, evolution on all five levels will not be realized. Too often, we succumb to the needs and desires of the two weakest plains - the Physical and the Mind. Too often, the Physical and the Mind work together and unwittingly deprive the Soul, Spirit and Energy with selfish, immediate wants. The Physical and the Mind are young - the least developed of all plains. And yet, we need the Mind to push us toward the greater evolutionary capabilities that exists within us all. To accomplish this, we need to teach ourselves to be aware of those neglected levels. We need to make conscious choices and decisions to grow in each of those areas so that we can further our evolution and realize the meanings of our individual and combined lives.

This is not an overnight change. The journey begins with the first breath and continues to the very last breath - and depending on your spiritual beliefs, you travel on even after your physical vessel ends its journey here. For those who do not believe in an afterlife as it is accepted in many formed religions, consider this thought - your actions while traveling through this world has an impact on everything and everyone around you and beyond. How you have impacted your children affects how they raise their children. How you treat each person you have come into contact with affects their day, attitude, demeanor which in turn affects the people they come into contact with and so on. What you throw away and keep. What you give and take. What you do and do not do. All of it changes the world ... touches the timeline ... shifts humanity in some way. So, you see, you do live on after your vessel ceases. Your Spirit merges with the Energy. You are universal.

We are powerful creatures because of our ability to comprehend and to grasp concepts in pure thought that other creatures on this planet abide by through pure instinct. We have the ability and the means to connect all five plains, creating an evolutionary explosion of unimaginable magnitude - one that would change all of mankind forever and lifting us up to beings of light, love and peace.

For me, the first step is to accept the responsibility that comes with awareness. I accept that my actions toward others and my attitudes about this world has an impact on the universe in ways I will never see or understand. I accept that I am important because of this and that each person I touch and each person touching me is equally as important.

This, My Friends, is the lesson for today. You are important. You are universal.

JVH