Self Improvement Tips

Increasing Your Self-Esteem - 15 Steps to Freedom

2010-02-25T12:04:00.000-08:00

Low Self-Esteem is like a demon that sits on our shoulder and constantly nags at us about our failures, appearance, short-comings and real or imagined mistakes.

Building high self-esteem is a process, not something you can develop overnight. Yet, if you are committed to the process you have the capacity to slowly start harnessing a high self-esteem.

15 Steps To Raise Your Self-Esteem

1. Commit yourself completely:

Commit to tackle the issue of Self-esteem. Build the conviction that you CAN beat low self-esteem and that you WILL commit yourself fully to do so. Share this commitment with others and tell them what behavior they should expect from you. E.g. you will reduce negative self-talk about yourself.

2. Stop putting yourself down:

You can't develop high self-esteem if you repeat negative phrases about yourself and your abilities. Start noticing what kind of chatter your mind 'Golum' (that ugly creature that lurks in the dark to create trouble) is telling you. Refuse to accept this negative self-talk anymore.

3. Forgive yourself for the past:

The past is the past... STOP dwelling on it. Just learn from your experience and do not blame yourself for things that you had no control over.

4. List your positive qualities:

Are you Unselfish? Honest? Helpful? Thoughtful? Be generous with yourself and write down at least 10 positive qualities. Feel the qualities within you as you read them and take them with you everywhere.-

5. List your past successes:

Sit down and reflect on all the achievements you did over the past few years - and write them down. It can include your "minor victories," like learning to drive a car, graduating from school, etc. Read this list often and visualize yourself living that moment......recreate the feelings of satisfaction and joy you experienced and bring the feelings back to your present state. .

6. Stop comparing yourself to others:

Some people have more than you but there are also others who have less- you may be choosing to look at the 'half empty glass'. If you play the comparison game, you'll end up focusing on what you do not have control over, rather than what you can actually change.

7. Use power statements:

Create empowering statements that help to align your mind towards positive thoughts e.g.

''I am a confident person and I deserve success"

"I am a wonderful person of immense value who deserves to be loved"

Repeat such statement several times during the day, especially at night before going to bed and after getting up in the morning.

8. Take a Self-help Program or read books that empower you.

Whatever material you sustain your mind with will dominate and eventually take root to affect your behavior. If you watch negative television programs or read newspaper reports that sell on bad news; you will grow cynical and pessimistic. On the other hand if you read books or listen to programs, that are positive in nature and inspire you, it will be eaiser to choose to be influenced by these positive characteristics. -

9. Associate with positive people:

When you are surrounded by negative 'wet blanket' people who constantly put you and your ideas down, your self-esteem is lowered. On the other hand, when you are accepted and encouraged, you will feel better about yourself. So make a CONSICIOUS CHOICE of the people who you choose to be with. Also make sure you find someone with whom you can share your feelings in a non-judgemental fashion. If needs be, seek professional help especially if you feel any symptoms of depression.

10. Accept compliments with a 'thank-you':

Don't answer with a," Oh, it was nothing." when you receive a compliment. When you reject a compliment, the message you give yourself is that you are not worthy of praise. Respond to all compliments with a simple 'Thank You' and FEEL GOOD about it!

11. Do activities you truly enjoy:

You won' t feel good spending your time doing activities that you despise. Find something that really inspires you and helps you build your confidence. Self-esteem flourishes when you are engaged in work and activities that you enjoy and make you feel valuable. Even if you can't explore alternative career options at the present time, devote leisure time to hobbies and activities which you find stimulating and enjoyable.

12. Give more:

I'm not talking about giving money for charities.

What I'm referring to is giving more of yourself to those around you. The more you give the more you will receive because through each act of contribution you will understand that you are making a difference in other people's lives. By making a positive contribution you will begin to feel more valuable, which, in turn raises your own self-esteem.

13. Be who you truly are:

Live your own life - not the life others have decided is best for you. You'll never gain your own respect and feel good about yourself if you aren't leading the life you want to lead. It's important to start exploring what your True Core Values are and who you would like to be as a person.

14. Take ACTION!

You won't develop high self-esteem if you walk away from challenges or remain an inactive participant of life. When you take action - regardless of the result - you feel better about yourself. The fact that you have taken a conscious decision to take an action will help you to feel more empowered. So work on creating more friendships and take risks in trying out new things that give you a sense of achievement.

15. Relax:

When you get the urge to think negative thoughts especially about any past experience pull yourself back into the present by deepening your breathing. The awareness of the breathing will keep you focused on the here and now where you should be.

Start taking these small actions everyday and there will come a day when you will feel that you can fly with the eagles!

To receive a FREE Report that provides information on the 10 Vital Keys to Life Success and other resources visit http://www.insightzonecoach.com. or http://www.insightzonecoach.com/blog Reggie Aquilina is the Founder of Insight Zone Academy. He is a Life Coach and works in the field of Adult Learning and Development. He is actively involved in providing e-learning resources related to Life Coaching and he is the creator of the Life Coaching Home Study Course: The 10 PowerKeys Program.

10 Happiness Secrets

2010-02-25T12:02:00.000-08:00

Happiness is difficult to attain, it is something that we cannot buy by money nor can borrow from somebody, people live with different targets and purposes in life, but to achieve those target we need peace of mind and happiness, usually it is difficult to understand the reasons for consecutive failure, poor performances or loss of good people around us, if we deeply contemplate we will find that we are lacking happiness in life which is putting negative impression on our attitudes and performance that put out undesirable results. The following points can help in adopting habits and building attributes to live a happy life.

1. Believe in destiny: Destiny rules; we should welcome what destiny brings us. Expressions like "I will change my destiny" or "that will change your destiny" are all exaggerations that are logically denied since nothing can change our destiny. As we are incapable to see our future so we can not perceive what destiny brings us the next minute, usually people are called lucky because their destinies brought them lots of prosperities and based on their prosperous record people know them as lucky. Always wish for the best and believe in your destiny, do not blame a whole day because of a small incident early in the morning which lasted for few minutes, wait to see, there are still lots of good awaiting your way.

2. Stay in present: the fear of future can eradicate your happy present moments, and past which is gone long ago can put negative effects on your present. Furnish your present by involving yourself in best things to do, eliminate any worrying memories since those are ones that can definitely reverse your mind back into failing situations, future is to come, so let it come and be hopeful that it will come along with a bunch of happiness and success.

3. Help others: there is no religion which prohibits helping others, and based on research and studies those with helping attitude are more likely to be happy than ones who are less helpful. Helping others result in mutual satisfaction, a sense of relaxation and comfort forms when we see somebody happy after receiving help. Whether it is a big one or small, helps are always deeply appreciated.

4. Stay alone for a while everyday: a busy day with people around, communicating with different groups, answering phone calls, chatting with friends and so on keep our brain so much loaded that we will not even notice how tired our brain is being involved in those activities. As physically we need rest so we do mentally. Find somewhere restful, you can even lock your room for some minutes and stay alone, do not think about anything, keep your eyes closed and feel like you got no responsibilities at all, if not for real but that short while the sense of ease from all aspects can generate positive results.

5. Make friends: choose your friends carefully with whom you have frequent contact, maintaining good friendship brings happiness, sharing happy moments with friends can double the joy for you and your friend. There is give and take among friends, which means if today you invite your friend for you party, next time they will invite you, this way the chain does not break and the happiness lights are on.

6. Care for your family: Family is where you get birth, grow up and age. Love, intimacy, dependency, care and lot more are found only when families are made, a single man may not experience different faces of life unless he lives in a family. We live with our parents, brothers and sisters in a family, that's how we are connected, to maintain this connection and live life with these none found elements of life we have to care for them. Help them when they need it and enjoy best and blessed moments with them, so then you can say life is good.

7. Choose an art: choosing an art like painting, learning to play musical instruments, photography or similar arts can keep you entertained all the time, it is fun to have or learn an art, gradually your creation will change to recreation when you have some refined results in hand, you can share those with people and enjoy your work.

8. Laugh out loud: even if it is a small joke, give it a big smile, researchers have found that laughter eliminates stress, reduces potential heart disease and brings joyous moments. If you know something funny or hilarious share it with others and laugh a while together, laughing with someone else can maximize the fun and happiness generated from that particular situation.

9. Listen to elders/take advice: even though technology has improved so much and youths never care for what is passed but experience can teach you lot than what you try to learn, asking elders for some advice regarding issues can give you a great idea of how to find solutions for problems, obviously when problems are solved or you have the potential to solve them you can feel pleased. Elders have witnessed different incidents, ups and downs of life, there is no doubt everyone faces problems in life and so do the elders whom we think may not realize what we see today, but the fact is that similar problems are everywhere around the world and majority of those are solved through different suggestions from different people, best source for those suggestions are elders.

10. Love and worship God: God is who knows what to do next. The good servant under his Lord's guidance and protection can face challenges of life and reach where he thinks he can't. God is the best leader for us and best provider, so if we love Him and worship Him we can be blessed with affluence and bliss from Him. Relying only on God can redeem us from sorrows, and free us from any disappointments and unhappiness.

If you make up your mind to be happy, you will be even happier.

Asadullah Azad

13 Habits of Extremely Abundant & Sexy Women

2010-02-19T08:26:00.001-08:00

Would you like to attract more abundance in your life? Would you like to exude raw sex appeal? What does sex have to do with success? Your sexuality is part of your creativity, which draws more abundance to you. Do you know how you look on the outside is a reflection about how you feel inside. The better you look, the better you feel, the more success you will attract. The path of true abundance comes from spending time, thought, and energy on those areas of your life that are the most fulfilling to you. Overtime, this is how you create the life you've always wanted & step into the highest version of yourself. Here are some quick tips that will undoubtedly lead to a beautiful & rich life!

1. Make Your Mess Magnificent - The sure fire way to be abundant is to be authentic. Stop worrying about what other people think & just be you. The more mistakes you learn from the more you grow. Repeat after me. I am perfectly, imperfect! Sitting pretty and trying to be perfect won't get you very far. Be the best you, amidst the mess. That's how you Perfect Your Potential™.

2. Be A Solo Artist - You can have it all but you can't be all to everyone. Take time to be by yourself. Be still to recharge, find peace & bring more of your inner beauty to the surface. Self-care is so important. When you take time for yourself it's a reflection of your self-worth. Beauty is not just vanity, it's valuing yourself.

3. The Beauty Of It All - The better you look, the better you feel, you better your chances of having it all. To think of beauty exclusively from a vanity prospective is an injustice. Beauty is involved in your daily tasks & is everywhere in the world around you. You must open your eyes & open your mind to experience it all. There are 7 strategies that I feel one must consistently implement to have a beautifully successful life from the inside/out.

4. Your Presence Is A Present - Do you see your value? Do you feel like you are a gift? Life is supposed to bring perpetual happiness. Enjoy yourself; surround yourself with others that see the beauty within you. The better you treat yourself, the better you will find life treating you. When you show up at your best you make the world a better place.

5. Faking It Is Not Allowed - Stop pretending to be something you are not. Being sexy means telling the truth & being honest with others when it comes to things that aren't aligning with your core values. In order to discover your true-worth and break the cycle of self-sacrifice, follow your heart. Live on purpose & with immense passion.

6. Laugh Out Loud - Do you know laughing makes it easier for you to cope with different challenges in life. It improves and strengthens your immune system and helps prevent a number of diseases. Play, have fun, go to a comedy show or watch a funny movie. Make time to laugh out loud.

7. The Cool Chic - Hot headed is not a trait that will make the men come running. Remain calm, cool & collective no matter what. In the event you slip up and throw a temper tantrum take a deep breath, regain your composure & set a positive intention to realign your energy. Giving good vibrations will always make you magnetic!

8. Live To Give - What have you done for other's lately? Giving is one of the most beautiful gestures! Whenever I feel like my life is not moving smoothly. I immediately look around & see if I'm being selfish & blocking my gifts due to lack of sowing first; reaping comes second. It's great to receive but like my mentor Bobi said so eloquently "Live To Give". Get to moving & give. It's the quickest way to attract abundance into your life. Being of service is tres chic & very sexy.

9. A Heart of Platinum - Open your heart & let everyone in. Love should never discriminate. Also remember to practice self-love. To be loved and accepted, you must start by loving yourself. Whatever you don't like about yourself find a way to love it anyway. There's nothing sexier than a woman that fully embodies self-love.

10. Spice Up Your Spiritual Side - Spirituality is not about what you're doing; it's about who you're being. If you want more beauty, more love, more abundance & more sex (yes I said sex). I highly suggest you turn to God. Set aside time to be with the divine. Find a place of worship, pray & meditate to keep you aligned with God. He is our abundant source.

11. Let It Go - Freeing your mind allows you to make room for more beauty & abundance in your life. Let go of the past. Stop carrying your problems in your purse. Release anger & resentment regularly after allowing yourself to feel these emotions fully. If you want to throw a hissy fit-fine but move on fast. Also you must be willing to let go of negative people, dream stealers & energy vampires. Saying good-bye to that which is no longer enriching your life is essential.

12. Be A Change Diva - It's time to change from the inside/out. Be open to new experiences, new looks & new ideas. Creativity is your birthright. Make it a habit to keep expanding your awareness and learning new things. If you are not growing you are not living. Women that are sexy have a knack for changing things up. They are not afraid to evolve which makes them drop-dead desirable.

13. Thanking Queen - A woman that knows how to be grateful is so sexy. Live with a glass half-full mentality. Practicing gratitude regularly is a powerful way to attract more abundance in your life. Look around & relish on the gifts of today. Focusing on what is good leads to the great. BTW...to make stunning advances you must learn to value your own life and your own gifts as much as you've been taught to value and nurture the lives of others.

© 2009 Ungenita Beauty International, LLC.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: After spending 10+ years in Hollywood as an Actress/Dancer/Body Double Ungenita Prevost learned how to Perfect Her Potential ™. Today she shows women all over the world how to discover their value & increase their self-worth. Named the Tony Robbins of Beauty. She's the world's first Beauty Empowerment Author/Speaker on a mission to show you how to Be Sexy, Love Who You Are and Make More Money all by bringing the beauty back into your life! She is a contributing writer & The Beauty Expert for American Medical Aesthetics, get your BILLION DOLLAR BEAUTY ESSENTIALS now at http://www.thebilliondollarbeauty.com

Email: info@TheBillionDollarBeauty.com

Overcome Your Shyness and Come Out of Your Shell

2010-02-19T08:13:00.000-08:00

Shyness can feel very unpleasant, as anyone who has experienced it knows only too well. It can be hard work to be in any social setting when you feel shy and more often than not the sense of awkwardness and self-consciousness can make you reconsider accepting future invitations. It can seem easier just to stay at home alone!

Statistics suggest that up to 50% of people have suffered from shyness in various situations at some time of their lives. It is most common among teenagers, but can affect anyone and is often associated with social inexperience and being overly self-conscious. Adults may find that their shyness can actually get worse over time, especially is they continue to remain very self-conscious in social settings and dread drawing attention to themselves in any way. In this respect, shyness can really damage a person's confidence, not only in social gatherings, but in all aspects of their life. Yet, the good news is that it is possible to overcome shyness and increase confidence although both goals require a little determination and effort.

As mentioned earlier, shy people don't like to stand out in a crowd. They don't feel worthy of positive attention and so think people are looking at them and criticising their faults. This, of course, is rarely true, but to a shy person it is something they feel is happening each time they venture to a party or a conference or a meeting. The key here is for the shy person to start to feel good about themselves - this is the first step to overcoming shyness. We are all different and all wonderfully individual and all of us have good qualities and talents. The greater your confidence, the happier you are with your differences and the more likely you are to celebrate your best qualities rather than try to hide them.

Start to write down all the good qualities you have - you will find that you have more than you first anticipated. Cherish these qualities and the things you have accomplished in your life. Keep this list with you every day, especially when you are meeting people and within time you will start to project these qualities to others because your confidence will be strong enough to do so. You will feel good about yourself and no longer self-conscious about perceived faults and you will undoubtedly start come out of your shell. Practice small conversations at first if you feel nervous in the beginning about speaking to people - perhaps a short chat with a cashier in a shop or a waitress in a restaurant.

Another important step to overcoming your shyness is to stop comparing yourself to others. Comparisons often lead to feelings of insecurity which will make your shyness worse. Instead of focusing on what people look like or how outgoing they appear, concentrate instead on what they say and really listen - don't plan your response prior to the speaker finishing what they are saying. We are all so much more than our exteriors, so focusing heavily on our appearance is a mistake.

When you focus on what other people are saying it takes away your own self-consciousness plus it makes the other person feel worthy and important. Making others feel good about themselves is a gift, and you never know, you might be helping someone else overcome their shyness and help them come out of their shell.

To find out more about building your confidence and self esteem, visit http://www.self-confidence-matters.com

Contribute to the World in Significant Ways - How? Self-Awareness, Exploring Options & Taking Action

2010-02-15T07:58:00.000-08:00

A devastating earthquake in Haiti. Sexual abuse of thousands of women and girls throughout our war-torn world. American families forced from their foreclosed homes - homelessness on the rise. Smog-filled skies and polluted rivers. Shuttered businesses - 12.3% unemployment nationwide, and growing. Under-funded schools, unconscionable dropout rates. Drug-gang violence....

As the world's woes bombard us from every direction, and appeals for help flood our email and mail boxes, so is it natural for each of us to feel both overwhelmed and anxious to do something significant to help, somehow.

This is when the suffocating questions begin to suffuse our thoughts about taking action. 'Where do I begin? What is the most pressing problem? I am just one person; how can my limited resources make a dent in all that needs to be done? Where can I make the biggest impact?' While each of these questions is valid, rather than helping us take focused action, they often have the opposite effect; they force us into knee-jerk responses at best, and an utter standstill at worst.

How can we move from this unsatisfying place to one where we consciously commit ourselves and our resources to causes that matter both to the world and to us?

Yes, both components - positively impacting the world and ourselves - are key. Why? Because sharing our resources from a win-win place means that we are expressing our authentic selves in response to the world's needs. Finding and sticking with these matches enables us to give freely and joyfully. As important, saying 'Yes' from our authentic selves to specific causes and organizations frees us from guilt about saying 'No, thank you' to others.

I propose 3 steps towards commitment that may be repeated yearly, biannually, or whenever there's a change in your life warranting review of your current choices:

SELF-AWARENESS--EXPLORING THE OPTIONS--TAKING ACTION Step 1: SELF-AWARENESS 1. Ask yourself, "What do I care about right now?"

For example: the environment; women's issues; animal rights; domestic and international poverty alleviation; healthcare; literacy...

Prioritize your top 2-6 choices. Save the others for the future (or for others who have them at the top of their lists).

2. Then ask yourself, "What are my specific, realistic, available resources that I'd like to share?"

(see categories below with examples)

a. special skills and/or hobbies - personal finance how-tos, athletics

b. financial contributions - amount quarterly, semi-annually, annually

c. volunteering/pro bono work - what type, how often, duration

d. other donations - clothing, books, food, giving blood

e. providing connections - government officials, educators, business leaders...

f. other -...

Once you've identified types/amounts/times above...

3. Merge 1 and 2 - what matters to you now + the resources you can and want to contribute. *At this point you may not know the specific organization(s) you'll be volunteering for, or contributing to, but you will know the cause(s) you're enthusiastically and realistically ready to put your resources behind.

Step 2: EXPLORING THE OPTIONS

Now that you've merged your whats with your hows, you're ready to move to exploration. It's a great way to connect with others and discover what resonates with YOU.

1. Ask: friends and colleagues via email, facebook, linkedin, twitter, face to face

2. Research the Web: key terms/organizations serving your causes

3. Visit/Interview: an organization and others who've committed to organizations you're targeting

4. Check-in with yourself. 'Am I excited about being involved in this cause? Is this organization where I want to put my time and/or resources?' If so, move to Step 3. If not, move to the next cause or organization on your list until you find the 'right' fit for YOU.

Step 3: TAKE ACTION

1. Say 'Yes' to causes and organizations that resonate with YOU.

2. Enjoy the commitment(s) you've made to make a positive difference in the world

P.S. If you're interested in viewing the commitments I've made to assist Haiti, please visit my blog:

dewhitaker blog-Helping Haiti

Dana E. Whitaker is president of Opening Eyes, LLC, a business committed to helping individuals reach their personal and professional goals with courage, clarity and (self-) compassion. As a coach, Dana helps her clients become more self-aware so that in expanding who they are, they may expand both what they want to, and believe they can do including: following a passion from start to finish, successfully navigating significant life and career transitions, creating healthy boundaries, developing effective communication strategies and satisfactorily managing work/life commitments and priorities. Dana offers individual and group coaching options. She graduated from Newfield Network, an International Coach Federation (ICF) certified coaching program.
Additionally, as an author, Dana's stories and accompanying color photographs in her book, Transforming Lives $40 at a Time, Women + Microfinance: Upending the Status Quo, bring readers face-to-face and heart-to heart with the dreams, fears, and successes of some of the world's poorest women from five continents who, having harnessed their profound courage and resourcefulness, are using microfinance loans and business training to transform both their lives and those of their families - inside and out. Dana speaks to groups around the country - businesses, universities, churches, schools, bookstores, women's and philanthropy groups - sharing not only these women's inspiring stories, but also her own passion-to-publish-to-coaching transformation.
To learn more about Dana and Opening Eyes, LLC, please visit: http://www.openingeyes.net

Five Things I Learned in 2009 About Success, Failure and Love

2010-02-15T07:54:00.000-08:00

Although 2009 has not been a completely easy year for most people to grow and make gains, you can get a lot of knowledge from your challenges and frustrations. We face many obstacles to reaching our goals no matter what the circumstances. If you focus on ways to overcome these obstacles and deal with them, you will be a much stronger business person for having done it. You will have more internal strength and confidence if you learn to turn obstacles into opportunities.

Here goes. These are some of the things that I learned from 2009 and I hope you can learn from them too.

1. Always Trust Your Gut Instincts.

When you are trying to make important decisions, your instincts usually the best guide for making the right choices. Find the information you need to help you in making the best decision, and then go with your hunch. Many things are decided best by using common sense. That is simply using your gut reaction. When many of us go against our hunches, we usually end up paying a heavy price for it.

2. Don't Overuse Your Strengths or They will Become Your Weaknesses.

My strengths are collaborating and getting the right people connected for a successful outcome to a project. I get others together to make a far greater outcome than I could do on my own. It became apparent to me that I over used my collaborating skills sometimes and I created a sort of co-dependence on other people. Remember that to align with others is good if it is to balance strengths. It is not so good if you are trying to compensate for your weaknesses.

3. Learn When to Pull the Plug on a Losing Project.

There are times that, out of loyalty and hard headedness, we keep pushing ahead on projects that are not in our best interest. When we first start out, we are excited about an outcome and it is hard to give up the fight, but sometimes it is best for all concerned to stop wasting time and effort on something that is just not likely to work out. This includes letting a person go from your team. Loyalty can be the wrong reason to keep someone who is misplaced. You will hold them back also. This may also involve stopping a pet project that you were sure would work. Sometimes accepting the fact that you need to stop something early can be best for all concerned.

4. Don't Take Failures Personally.

This is a hard thing to do sometimes. When you have a few setbacks, no big deal, you just get up and go on. When you start to have more than a few though, things can get a little depressing. You sometimes need to call on your support team, to help you pull yourself up by your boot straps and get moving. Failures are opportunities to learn something new and use it to reach higher ground. You need to have a good support system that you can lean on or fall on every now and then, but don't let your failures wear you down. They are obstacles in the road that you can deal with and overcome.

5. Look for Success in Ways Other Than Monetary Measurements.

This year I met someone who has added more to my life than I ever thought possible. I met my soul mate, a man that I am truly in love with and happy with. He is not even in my industry. He understands what my purpose in life is though, and is very supportive of my efforts. He is just as committed to personal growth, financial success and helping others as I am. We look in the same direction and have the same vision. So success can come in unexpected ways. Be open to seeing all possibilities.

What lessons about failure, success, and love did you learn for yourself in 2009? Author, life coach, and entrepreneur Melanie Strick can help! Click this link for more info on how you can diversify your income to create more stability: CEO Success Strategies.

Learn How to Gain Confidence Naturally and Enjoy a Happy Life!

2010-02-13T07:45:00.000-08:00

Do you suffer from stress, anxiety or depression? Do you often feel like a misfit in your own skin? Do you avoid going places and doing exciting things because you worry about what other people may think about you? Are you constantly telling yourself how awful you are or how bad you feel? Do you feed your mind with negative thoughts continuously? Perhaps you are suffering from low self-esteem because of all the negativity in your life. Do you know that if you continually think negative thoughts that positive things have no room to move into your life? It is true?

However, you can do something about this; you can make a difference in your life. You can gain your sense of self-confidence, when you take an active part in doing the things you need to do to reprogram the way you think about certain things and the way you feel in particular situations. One of the first things you need to understand when you are suffering from low self-esteem and you want to build your confidence is that it will take some work on your part. You will have to learn how to reprogram the way you think. You will have to get rid of our negative thoughts, and then replace them with positive thoughts. Sometimes this is much easier to say than it is to do. However, when you are committed for making such a positive difference in your life, you can do just that. Keep in mind that you should be patient with yourself while you learn to become a more confident you.

When you are able to boost your self-confidence, you can face anything that comes your way. When you continually feed your subconscious mind with positive reinforcement and positive affirmations, you can succeed in building your confidence to higher levels. However, in order to learn how to build self-confidence naturally and enjoy a happy life you need to find a program that will work for you. Sure, many individuals may turn to medication to help them adjust, some may even use alcohol or mood altering drugs to help them feel more self-confidence. Nevertheless, this is a false sense of confidence and it will never progress into anything that is productive or reliable. There are easier, healthier and better means of boosting your self-confidence.

Rather than making use of something that creates a false sense of confidence, you will be much better off using something proven to work for everyone. Once you find the right type of program and put the time and effort required to make such a difference in your life, you will act and feel so much different. You can awake and enhance your sense of self-esteem. You can control your life and the way you think and act according to any particular situation.

With your newly found sense of confidence, you are free to conquer the world and make it yours. You will no longer worry about making a fool of yourself. You will not worry about what anyone else may think of you. You can become familiar and comfortable in your own skin and make the type of impression on others that you always wanted too.

T S Gill is a researcher. His main focus is to help people to gain their self confidence naturally. For more information and guidance please visit: http://www.gainyourconfidence.com

Stop Trying to Be Normal

2010-02-13T07:37:00.000-08:00

It undermines your success and keeps you in a state of mediocrity. It's an interesting phenomenon.

This idea of being "normal" starts to take hold in high school. There begins to form this desire to "fit in" - to be part of a group. Or at least, not be singled out as someone who "doesn't fit in". Along with that comes the desire to be an "insider". This need to belong and to be an insider can be very strong for many people.

Although the challenges and insecurities from our high school days are long gone, that need to belong - to be part of the group - to be accepted - to belong - can still be very strong. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be accepted and/or wanting to fit in, but when this "wanting" turns to "needing", it becomes detrimental to a person's success.

This often occurs when a person has an "external frame of reference" rather than an "internal frame of reference". Having an external frame of reference means looking outside of one's self to determine the truth of things. Things like right vs. wrong, appropriate vs. inappropriate, and successful vs. unsuccessful. When a person has an external frame of reference, they look to others for approval. They base their self-worth and their self-image on what others think and say about them.

Conversely, having an internal frame of reference means looking within one's self to determine the truth of things; to determine right vs. wrong, appropriate vs. inappropriate, and successful vs. unsuccessful. When a person has an internal frame of reference, they don't look to others for approval. I'm not saying recognition and acknowledgment aren't meaningful to someone with an internal frame of reference. I'm simply saying that they aren't the driving forces for their actions. Someone with an internal frame of reference bases their self-worth and their self-confidence on what they know to be true about themselves.

Which brings us back to the idea of being "normal". Most people consider themselves to be "normal" and consequently most groups of people consider themselves to be "normal". Therefore, in order to remain part of the group, one needs to remain "normal."

And being "normal" - by definition - means being "average". Consequently, many people - in an attempt to fit in and belong - spend their lives striving to be average. Sometimes they do it consciously and sometimes they do it unconsciously. Sometimes it's done by intent and sometimes inadvertently. But it happens nonetheless...

A person is striving to be average (or "normal") when they work hard to meet a quota rather than exceed it. A person is striving to be average when they purposely minimize themselves and their dreams so that their associates, family and/or friends don't belittle them for dreaming big. A person strives to be average by "playing it safe" - not in terms of taking physical or financial risks, but in terms of taking the risks inherent in hoping for, dreaming of, and working towards the things that would set you apart from the others.

It takes courage to break away from "normal"; to separate oneself from the crowd. You risk not fitting in and not being accepted by the group of people you've been a part of. You risk feeling embarrassed if you don't achieve your goals when you said you would. You risk being disappointed and frustrated.

But when you reach your goals - when you realize your dreams - you will know that you are not "normal". You will not be average. And interestingly enough, you will find that you've become part of a new, different group. You will be part of a group that is not "normal". You will be part of a group that knows that each member is not "average".

Mark Twain once said, "Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."

The decision to separate yourself from the crowd comes from a within. It arises from a desire to realize one's full potential and a resolve to take responsibility for one's future. It doesn't matter what others say or do or think. None of them pay your bills. None of them have your dreams.

Sometimes it's a lonely path. Sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it's frustrating. But one thing is true for sure. It's always worthwhile.

I know what it's like to try to fit in. I know what it's like to try to be normal. I used to have an external frame of reference.

But I changed. I stopped trying to fit in. I stopped trying to be average and I started striving for excellence. I started setting bigger and bigger dreams and goals. I started associating with other successful people. I don't fit in very well with people who are "normal". I never have. But I've come to realize that I fit in with people who are extraordinary.

So stop trying to be normal. Come and join me instead...

Written by Michael Beck, Business Philosopher & Strategist. For more articles and to subscribe to his free monthly newsletter, "Full Potential", please visit http://www.mbeckweb.com. Permission to reprint with full attribution. © 2010 Michael Beck International, Inc.

Is Your Life Working Wonderfully? How to Ditch the Fear of Success

2010-02-11T12:28:00.000-08:00

There are several ways of getting rid of fear. Some people advocate facing it head on. That kind of person will lead you to the edge of the diving board and then give you a push. No doubt they do the same if you are in front of them with a parachute strapped to your back and hesitating before you jump.

This gung-ho approach works for some things but it's difficult to do it by yourself, in the same way that it's difficult to inflict pain on yourself. So if you have to be self motivating you're probably not going to take that route.

Another approach is to avoid fear completely. If you want to expand your business, make your career a bit more zappy, or make a major change in your life avoiding fear will just make you stay stuck. But for completeness, here are some guidelines on how to do it -

(Subtitle - the Yellow Custard Rabbit's Guide to Never Being Afraid)

1. Don't have any big dreams. Make sure your dreams are very small. That way no one is threatened, everything will stay the same and if you move forward, it will be at the speed of an infinitesimally slow snail. You won't have to fear change because it isn't going to happen. The really big dreams are scary because they involve you and your purpose, they are personal.

2. Make sure you don't step across anyone's boundaries. If you can't upset them you'll stay safe. Small, frustrated, even angry, but safe. Your own boundaries will become a bit blurred and you may end up with 'doormat' stamped on your forehead. But hey, you'll be safe.

3. Don't admit to having any ambitions. Career ambitions? Business growth ambitions? Personal success? NO, No, No, not if you want to feel totally safe all of the time. People won't like it. It's not what you were meant to do.

4. Don't rock the boat. Like, saying what you really think. Having opinions of your own. Who knows, your meek attitude combined with endless hard work might just get you to the top (yeah, right).

But if that sounds too restrictive, not much fun and all about other people's stories, try the Hero's approach '

Subtitle - The Hero's Guide to Great Rewards (Making Fear Redundant)

1. You could have REALLY big dreams. Go on, live dangerously just for once, get a pen and paper and write down exactly what you want to do with your life, your business, you career. And you are only allowed to write things down when you've spent at least ten minutes daydreaming about this so you've got the full picture, all the sounds and smells and feelings - whatever you need to make your dream as vivid as possible.

2. Know where you begin and other people end. I'm not suggesting you turn into Mr or Ms obnoxious 2010 but if you change and their equilibrium is destroyed maybe that shouldn't stop you changing. Maybe they can change too. Maybe you can change and keep all the best bits of who you are now. Maybe they can love your success. The possibilities are endless if you learn how to be your wonderful, authentic self.

3. Be as ambitious as you want to be. For you it may be running a company with a turnover of a million or more. Or a billion. Or it might be to start your own business. Or live your lifelong dream of becoming an astronaut. Or becoming the National Apple Pie Baker champion. Or all of the above (which would not be mutually incompatible, though you'd be awfully busy). And if it doesn't feel quite like you, start off with a slightly smaller ambition but always have the big dream in mind.

4. Get the facts right, be knowledgeable, then express your opinions. You're a grown up now and can have your say. It doesn't mean you'll always be right or get your own way. It does mean you will have a space in the universe and not be background scenery. And then you can really blossom.

Of course, this alternative view means that you won't be surrounded by a total lack of fear. Yes, there will be times when you have to step out beyond your comfort zone. But the rewards will be great. You might get external rewards like riches, fame and fortune.

Liz Copeland is the True Courage Coach. If you are on the brink of something big and want to move forward or if you are being forced to take a big step True Courage Coaching will support you. So if you've lost the job, your partner or your waistline and you want to get to step up and into your ideal future get started right away with your free True Courage Creation Kit at http://www.truecouragecoaching.com

Universal Law of Increase - How to Use it and Attract Prosperity

2010-02-11T12:22:00.000-08:00

The universal law of Increase states,"the more you give, the more you receive."

The first law that was created is the law of giving. Everything that is good, seen and unseen in this world comes from God (or you can call it the divine Source, the Creator, the divine Consciousness, etc.). It is given to us for free. The air that we breath, the water that we drink, fire that keep us warm, Ideas that made this world a better place to live in. If God gave us all these great things for free, who are we not to give?

When we have an attitude of giving, we are removing the limits of all the good things that come to us. Why, because an attitude of "taking" or "Getting" produce a congested condition, a stagnant state, and limited action. It prevents the flow of God's Blessings into our life.

Realize this; we must give first before we can receive. That is the law. Giving always come first before getting. Focus on giving first, may it be your service, your good deed, your thoughts, your advices or your money, and nature will respond, and give back more than you give. Remember to focus entirely on giving. Forget about getting.

Let us take giving money as an example. First, what is money? Money is just a piece of paper with ink. Money per se does not have value. It is the idea or concept of what money can get for us, like Holiday vacation, nice expensive car, big houses, fine food, luxury, etc. Money is only a way of exchanging value. Now, before giving away money, you have to think first who are you going to give your money? My advice is to give it to those people who make an effort to help themselves. Why, because if you give it carelessly, you cannot expect it to come back to you. When you give, be purposeful and systematic; learn to give without string attached.

When giving, it must be done in the right spirit. Give with an open heart only; sincerity, honesty and in good spirit. By doing this, abundance will flow in your life.

Even if your salary or income is small, every time you received your salary, try to give a certain amount or percentage away. You can give it to a charity or a good cause. And you will observe that in a short period of time, you'll see that the money that you gave away will return to you in greater amount than you imagine.

Remember to give willingly, no attachments or obligations. Or else it will return to you with attachment or obligations. When you reach a point of yielding to the law, and you become generous, then, you become a new person. Your attitude towards others, towards the law, and towards your life conditions will acquire the nature of your new way or thinking

Remember, you can only receive what you can conceive and you can only get the equivalent of what you give.

Clark Pasag
http://www.strongmindbender.com

5 Creativity Killing Habits You Don't Even Realize You Have

2008-05-15T12:20:00.000-07:00

Being more creative isn't just about finding lots of new ways you can increase your creativity, additions you can make to your creative life to make it all flow more smoothly and easily. More powerful than adding new techniques is reducing the kind of habits you already have that are seriously limiting your creativity, maybe without you even knowing it.

So here are 5 top creativity killing habits, how to recognise them, and what to do instead:

1. You tell yourself you're JUST a writer/painter/sculptor... Even though you may be prolific in one creative form and creating away happily, if you see yourself only as being able to create in this one medium, it can significantly restrict you. The basic principles of creativity are not about the tools and materials you use, they're about how you bring ideas into being that weren't there before. Try creating in a few other mediums now and then to stretch yourself and expand your creative horizons.

2. You hold back after periods of great creativity. So you've had a weekend of great creative activity and you're glowing with pride at your efforts. "Hang on though, if I've been so creative in such a short time, I'd better hold back and ration myself for a few weeks, just in case my creativity runs out." Sound familiar? Creativity breeds creativity, we don't have a finite supply of ideas, the more we come up with, the more will appear. So don't get caught up in the myth that we each have a limited supply of creativity that will suddenly one day run out.

3. You believe you're only "playing around" and not a real artist. You can be highly creative and still believe that you're just dabbling and not really a serious creative artist. This deeply held belief can cause you to keep your creativity very low key, hidden away even, meaning you never truly enjoy your creativity at its fullest. The truth is, everyone who creates has these thoughts sometimes. If you create stuff, you're a creative artist, and your work is of value, it's as simple as that. So create and be proud!

4. You talk down your creative achievements. Maybe when you create new projects, and people say they enjoy them or are inspired by them, you dismiss their comments with lines like: "oh anyone can do it" or "it's nothing special" and "It's OK, but I can do much better". Not only does this belittle your own great efforts, but it's actually disrespectful to those making the comments. It's not for you to judge how moved someone is by what you've created, give THEM credit for knowing what they enjoy and telling you, and give YOURSELF credit for having created it.

5. You delay creating until after "essential" tasks. How often do you just decide to create and do it? How often do you find yourself thinking "Right, I'm going to get down to creating as soon as I've checked my emails" or "...finished this episode of my favourite sitcom" or "...rearrange my collection of 1000 books"? Create first, while your energy and inspiration is high, do these other tasks after, as they take hardly any mental or creative effort. Save your juices for creating!

Which of these creativity killing habits do you recognise in your own life? Which can you focus on and take steps to reducing starting from today?

Want to learn more about how to increase YOUR creativity? It's easy: just sign up to "Create Create!" - Creativity Coach Dan Goodwin's free twice monthly ezine - today, and get your free copy of the "Explode Your Creativity!" Action Workbook. Head on over now to http://www.CoachCreative.com.

Navigating Change

2008-05-15T12:17:00.000-07:00

All of us recognize when our lives need work. We may deny it or ignore the signs but whether it's health, finances, family relationships or some other problem, we know when things don't feel right. But fixing them? That's not so easy.

Viewing all our problems at once can be overwhelming. We have to look closer and determine what needs fixing first. If, for example, the kids are out of control because a couple can never agree on discipline, it would be pointless to start with the kids. They are not the problem. The marriage is. What about health? Suppose someone is suffering anxiety attacks, stress related high blood pressure and other health problems because they insist on controlling every aspect of life, including family members. The anxiety attacks are not the problem. The control issues are.

It's not that the secondary issues won't eventually have to be addressed. They will. But we have to zero in on the root problems that are making every aspect of life fall apart around us. It's not enough to say, "I want to work on my marriage." What part of the marriage? Trust? Intimacy? Respect? Spiritual life? Communication? Forgiveness?

All areas of life are multi-layered and complex. Every problem has a core, a deep place where some belief, behavior or habit is out of whack. Behind every addiction or personality flaw there is a deception.

When we resolve to improve our lives we must become detectives if we hope to fix things in correct order. So don't fall into the trap of trying to fix everything that is wrong all at once. And never work on more than one problem at a time. Try these steps:

Identify the most critical problem
• Make a plan for change
• Write down steps to success
• Implement the plan
• Forgive yourself any lapses
• Reward yourself for success
• Remember that habits are created by repeated behaviors
• Once you feel you have achieved a new pattern, you can identify and begin to work on another problem

So, whether it involves parenting, marriage issues, finances or a destructive habit such as drugs or smoking, you CAN take control of your life, improve your circumstances and make life altering changes for yourself and your family.

Just remember, the number one rule is ONE PROBLEM AT A TIME. Don't focus on the children if you and your spouse getting into agreement on parenting is the issue. YOU change and they'll change. Don't focus on "marriage" if your problem is trust or intimacy. Identify the problem and work on THAT and you will see results before you know it. Don't focus on vitamins supplements or protein if your problem is dependence on alcohol or cigarettes. Beat the habit and you may feel better than you ever have.

Step by step, line upon line, here a little and there a little is the way to achieve enormous life changes.

Beverly Vines-Haines is the Marketing, Research and Text Coordinator for Healing Leaf LLC. This is a company that tackles the toughest skin and nail conditions known to man. A best-selling author for years before she became a part of Healing Leaf LLC, she is dedicated to natural healing and creating pure products that are both safe and earth friendly. For more information about these effective products, visit http://www.NoFungusAmongUs.com

Replace Negative Thinking with Positive Thinking

2008-05-15T12:14:00.000-07:00

Negative thinking is something that haunts many of us. Try as we may, it seems that the negative thoughts simply come more easily than the positive ones. If you are tired of always looking at the world with pessimism, it's time to change! Afraid that negative thinking is just a part of who you are? Don't worry, with the help of negative thinking affirmations anyone can start to look at the world in a more positive manner.

Negative thinking affirmations are a way to change the way that you look at the world starting right now. Instead of always looking at the glass as half empty you can teach yourself to see it as overflowing. You may be thinking that this way of thought will be nothing less than a miracle, but it's not! With negative thinking affirmations anything is possible, regardless of how negative your thought process is and how long you negative thinking has plagued you.

The Benefits of Positive Affirmations

Using free positive affirmations can prove to be invaluable to your life. When you are able to approach life in a more positive nature you will find that life is a lot sweeter. You may be more willing to do, say, and try things that you wouldn't have tried before. You'll be able to approach life with more hope and you'll simply feel better as a result. Because you feel better and are willing to do things that you wouldn't have done before, you'll also be a lot more fun to be around (your friends will thank you) and you'll experience a completely new world around you. You'll be a magnet for like-minded success-seekers and you'll get more done, in less time. Why? Because 50% of your time will be saved from the constant complaints and negative thoughts you once had. Does this sound like a good idea or what!

The Simplicity of Affirmations

Negative thinking affirmations seem simple when you look at them because they appear to be nothing more than a simple statement. When you believe that the negative thinking affirmations are statements of truth, you are taking the power of negative thought away and giving it to the positive nature that does dwell within you. When you say these free positive affirmations you are literally training your mind how to work in a different way. You will be able to see the effects of using these negative thinking affirmations right away because they will start opening your mind from minute one.

When you start using negative thinking affirmations you may feel a bit silly, but if you believe that you can change you are already on your way toward more positive thought. When you find yourself being negative, sometimes all you need is a reminder to think differently about a situation or about life in general. Free positive affirmations are a simple reminder that will allow you change your thought process for good. You may have times where you start to feel a bit negative, but reciting your negative thinking affirmations can help you stop the negativity in its tracks. Your life will be better for the change in thinking, so make positive affirmations part of what you do starting right now!

Ronnie Nijmeh is the president and founder of ACQYR.com - a resource that provides free desktop wallpapers, motivational articles, and inspirational affirmations. Read more free positive affirmations.

Confidence - 7 Suggestions To Feel More Confident In Social Situations

2008-05-07T14:51:00.000-07:00

Many people lack confidence when interacting with others... and for some, any form of social situation can be extremely difficult. Social interaction whether it be work-related or personal life can be stressful to the point where the person becomes highly anxious and unable to function the way he or she usually does.

A lack of confidence can make meeting and talking with people extremely difficult... making conversation with someone who has a huge lack of confidence is like drawing teeth without an anaesthetic! Painful!

Not only is it painful for the person who is trying to converse with someone who lacks confidence but the person who lacks confidence is often in agony!

Our level of confidence is influenced by many things including how we feel about our expertise and knowledge, how we feel others perceive us, how comfortable we are with others.

And our confidence is also influenced by how we feel we look to others... how we feel we "shape up" in the eyes of others.

There are many things we can easily, inexpensively, and quickly do to give ourselves a confidence boost when meeting or interacting with others.

Here are 7 suggestions to look good. If you look good... you feel good. If you feel good about your looks, your confidence gets a much needed boost:

be clean and tidy -- make sure you are fresh e.g. have a shower or a wash to freshen up. When your skin is clean and fresh you feel so much better. Often it isn't possible to shower just before being with others e.g. meeting after work. But you can go to any public restroom and wash your face and hands, touch up your makeup (if you are a woman), reshuffle your clothing e.g. straighten your tie, your shirt, your skirt
looking good doesn't mean having expensive clothing -- when you are meeting others, take some time choosing what you will wear. Wear clothes that you feel good in -- word of caution: most of us feel so great and comfortable in daggy trackies but that type of clothing does not do you any favours when you lack confidence with others. Choose clothing that makes you feel more confident e.g. slightly dressy but still comfortable
make sure you have tidy footwear -- having appropriate footwear, again it doesn't have to be designer label or the most expensive, as long as it is reasonably clean, helps you feel more confident. In other words... avoid wearing joggers to a cocktail party for your work!
make sure your hair is tidy -- just before you are meeting others and being put in a potentially stressful situation, comb your hair. If you know you have an important social engagement coming up that day make sure your hair is clean -- wash it!
have a fresh mouth -- remember, when you are with others you will most probably need to talk (cringe) which means people will be within a relatively short distance from your mouth. A major confidence destroyer is the concern that we have something stuck in our teeth or that our breath smells... Do yourself a favour -- clean your teeth or at least give your mouth a thorough rinse before any social contact!
smile! Become aware of your facial expressions... and make yourself smile! All too often when we lack confidence, we tend to frown, look serious or vague... not good! Stand in front of the mirror and practise smiling... and remember if your mouth is clean and fresh you won't have the worry of what's between your teeth!
practice confident posture and walking -- stand up straight, shoulders back, head held high, and don't slouch! Watch confident peoples posture and walk and copy what they do!

Helping yourself to boost your confidence is essential... and there are so many little tricks that will boost your confidence!

Jeanne May works with spiritually minded people providing them information, inspiration, guidance and support to achieve their goals and dreams... subscribe to Aspirations Plus and receive updates and a complimentary copy of "#1 Ingredient To Fast Track Your Success!"

I invite you to discover more about the difference confidence makes in your life, and learn easy to use techniques to develop Unstoppable Confidence.

Self-Esteem - Overcome Low Self-Esteem with Simple Techniques

2008-05-07T14:50:00.000-07:00

Low self-esteem affects our love lives, careers, family bonds, and, most of all, our internal sense of well-being. High self-esteem, however, exudes confidence, problem-solving abilities and the assertiveness necessary to achieve your goals.

The more you like yourself, the more you act in likable ways. The more you believe you can achieve something, the more likely it is that you will.

It is a well-known fact that we can all take steps to improve our self-esteem. The most important relationship you have is with yourself!

The expression "Self-Esteem" is often used in our everyday life, although most people don't really know the exact meaning of it. Most people think that self esteem is another name for confidence. Certainly, confidence is part of the definition of self esteem but it is a lot more than that. For example, there are numerous people in the world that are at the height of their confidence but have very poor self-esteem. Most of the people in the public eye fall into this category. The most common are actors, comedians and singers who glow on stage, and yet offstage, they feel insecure.

There are a few different ways to improve your self esteem. The most basic of them is that you must realize that you are not alone. There are many others who have this problem. The second fact that you must remember is that you are a very special person and you are an important part of society and you have as much right to live happily and peacefully as everybody else.

Another thing to remember is that everyone makes mistakes. Making mistakes is a fact of life for everyone. No one is perfect. Never forget the saying 'to err is human'. Hopefully most of us will learn from our mistakes. We also have the right to respect ourselves just like we respect others. Most importantly, you have the right to say 'yes' or 'no' for yourself. People with poor self esteem feel that they are inferior to others and are unable to make the right decisions.

Here are some the techniques to help improve your self esteem.

* The ten minute technique: take ten minutes a day and do nothing but just sit and relax. This helps bring back your confidence. Many people find this technique helpful.

* Accentuate the Positive: if you are one of those who tends to go over your mistakes again and again, make sure it is only for one reason: to correct them.

* List 50 things that you like about yourself: then go over them every day. This will help you to focus on your strengths and will keep you on the right track.

To learn the simple secrets to building your self-esteem, visit http://www.selfesteem.healthehelp.com where you'll find everything you need to know about improving your confidence, including self help, self-esteem improvement courses, and much more!

Improving Your Self Confidence

2008-05-07T14:47:00.000-07:00

Let's face it, we all need Self Confidence to cope with the trials of modern life, but what many people don't realise is the extent to which our lives are governed by this simple attribute of personality. Self-confident people are winners: things go right for them; people like them; and they get the results they want more often than not.

Now wouldn't you like to have more of that kind of quality in your life? Well - you can! If you are not a self-confident person, you can become one; and it's easier than you might think. But before we can walk through the 'door' to unlimited self-confidence, we need to first discover exactly what a confident person is; then we can look at how to acquire it.

First of all, a self-confident person is someone who believes they are confident. Their lives exude confidence because they are simply being true to that unshakeable inner belief. Conversely, a person without confidence is someone who does not have that belief; and is equally acting out the consequences of their inner thoughts. Same process - different results!

Here we have the key to acquiring that confidence: we must change our beliefs about who and what we are. Once we have done that, the rest - the unshakeable self confidence we seek - will follow quite naturally. So the question really becomes one about how we can go about the business of changing our beliefs about who we are and what we are capable of achieving; and there are many ways to do that including self-hypnosis, NLP and the use of positive affirmations.

In this article, I want to take a look at the use of positive affirmations. Affirmations do work because they deal with changing the inner person first. The reason they work is because: if you choose to repeat a particular phrase over and over again (I recommend at least three times a day; and three repetitions each time - that's 9 time in total - minimum) then eventually your subconscious mind will accept that you are what you have been saying.

Once that acceptance has taken place for the inner person, the outer person will begin to experience the benefits. The good news is that you don't even have to believe in the process; you just need to engage in the discipline of doing the repetitions each and every day until you produce the results you want.

Affirmations for Self-Confidence and Self-Belief:

- I AM Growing in Confidence Each and Every Day

- I AM Receiving All the Self-Confidence I Need

- I AM Brimming with Confidence

So try the above affirmations, repeating each of them three times; and do this procedure three times per day. Try them for a period of one month and you will begin to see some excellent results!

For more tips on developing your Self-Confidence, get our excellent book: Unshakable Self-Confidence. This book is completely free (no sign-up required). Get an immediate download here ...

http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/bookstore-index.htm

Will Edwards is Founder of White Dove Books

http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk

What To Do With Your Money

2008-04-25T12:34:00.000-07:00

Every day we have people that want to tell us what to do with our money. If you really look at that is pretty ballsy I think. Okay I have to say that I agree with you. So here is my question then what are you going to do with your money? I was talking with a retired man one day who is drinking himself to death. I am not joking. When I first met the man he was tell working. He was telling me that he could not wait to retire and re-lack. It has been two years now he has been to rehab two times and has had about three drink related accidents. So I guest to question is what are you going to do with your money and time.

One I talked to a man that had a friend who at 60 did not retire nor did he at 65, 70, 75, or 80. Some people would say that working kept him alive. Well at 81 he could not walk without falling, he has trouble seeing and his health is so, so. His past social life was little as he was always working. Many of his family members and friends are pasted away. So now he has the money but not one to spent it on and he is in no condition to spend it as he would have liked too. Nor can he really enjoy it. Life is about living not watching it pass you by while you wait for your own time to pass. You can not take it with you.

One day I spoken with a lady that makes a lot of money drives, an expensive car yet she is miserable on the inside. She will fire a single mother who had made a few bad choices in her life yet is visibly working hard to correct her mistakes and is moving in the direction. Yet turn a blind eye on her own regular and repeated missteps. Then to make herself feel as she is help will spend money that is not hers to hire a company to recycle some items for the good of the environment. Again dismissing her own daily environmental footprint and impact on our world.

One day spoke with a very nice young lady that told me that she gives at her church. I told her that was great. I then asked her where did her donation go. She told me that they where in the process of building a new bigger church. So I asked her what was wrong with the old church? She said nothing. Why where they building a new one she said we just needed a new building. I said okay then asked her what kind of car did her pastor drive. The lady smiled and very happily told me he the pastor just got a new Mercedes and his wife the co-pastor just get a new Jaguar a few months ago. I then ask the lady what type of volunteer activities she had done. Her answer was no she did not done any. She then asked me if I volunteered I said yes and that I have for the last 8 years teaching for a local non-profit and for over 7 years before that at the local boys and girls clubs where I lived.

Then you have companies like Enron and those people who wasted millions on things that they really did not even want or need. This along with the rising cost of gas, food, and transportation. We have hundreds of people losing their jobs and homes. Jobs going over sea you call a customer service number and you find that you are talking with someone you can not understand. Plus does not seem to know how to assist you with the matter you call them for in the first place. We are in the worst debt in history at a county. I think we need to work to help each other here in America.

Dale Carnegie said he spend half of his life making money his future and he said that he would spend the other half giving it away. Very few can say that Mr. Carnegie was not a very smart man. So we are back to what to do with your money. We run a martial arts school in northern Virginia we work with all types of people and I know that we do a lot of good for the community. So my suggestion is that you give the money to us. We will put it to good and positive uses. Like scholarship programs for students that want to train in the martial arts and get in better physical condition. People that need to find and move in a positive direction. Young people who have entered into a positive martial arts environment and are positive and active in the community help them with higher educational goals like going to college. People if your donation helps to keep one child in the school doing productive things and out of trouble that it a great and wonderful thing. No one person can save to world but each of us can make a difference.

How you give and what you give is up to you. My promise is that your donation will help many who could use it. In these uncertain times and your donation will go to assist those here in the US. There is more to life then money that is true. But the lack of money can make life hard.

Success story: We had four students that just before start at our school where not doing well in school. After talking with the parents we found that the parents did not think they would all graduate high school. Not only did these students graduate one was offered 3 full scholarships and one partial. All of them are also now in college and doing well. By the way the scholarships were for academics.

Today Is Now!

By Zurriane Bennett

San Yama Bushi & Combination GoJu
School of Self Defense
http://www.sybcg.com

Moving From Fear to Attracting What You Want

2008-04-25T12:33:00.000-07:00

Have you ever realized that our entire planet runs on the energy of fear? If you have never taken the time to wonder the core reason most people will never attract their desires think for a moment. Fear is at the heart of all our troubles.

The key ingredient which holds everyone back from attracting their desire is the fear that it is not possible. There is the fear of not being good enough and the fear that there is lack in the world and the fear of what will happen if you do succeed.

Even the greatest success motivator will tell you that with each new goal they hope to manifest there is an element of fear they must overcome. Here are 3 ways of overcoming your fears and finally attracting the life of your dreams.

Small Steps Lead to Big Wins

Nothing great was ever manifested in one sweeping step. If you desire to change your life in a big way and manifest your greatest desires start with small action. After you have succeeded with each small step you will gradually gain confidence with each win. Each wining step will confirm to your subconscious mind that you are making progress and what you desire to manifest is very possible.

Examine the Stories of Those Who Have Gone Before You

You can learn more from the actions of those who can share their failures. In that way you learn what not to do. Although great success comes with bring first hand and practical you can learn by listening and watching the pitfalls. Every great success story came with lots of failed attempts. Learn from those who failed and won.

Immersion

In order to master anything in life you must immerse yourself deeply within that topic. You must be willing to invest lots of your time reading, learning and taking action. Manifesting is an inner and outer awareness and development of the self. The more you engage all of your time within the topics you hope to overcome the faster you can move from fear to power.

Sign Up for a Free Manifesting Software and Magic Money Newsletter
http://www.cosmic-wealth.com/lawofattraction
Discover the ancient techniques to manifesting faster resutls using simple yet powerful techniques found in the powerful Magic Money ebook written by Daniel Hinds.

Who Do You Trust?

2008-04-25T12:30:00.000-07:00

"To pursue success effectively, you must build supportive relationships that will help you work toward your goals. To build those relationships, you need to trust others: and to earn their trust, you in turn must be trustworthy." - Stedman Graham

From 1957 to 1962 a popular game show called "Who Do You Trust?" aired on television. Edgar Bergen and then Johnny Carson hosted, so it was also a funny show. People participated as pairs, usually married couples. The premise of the show was that contestants had to choose who would answer the questions in order to win prizes. The challenge to them was, "Which of you feels confident with this category? Who do you trust?"

Consider how well you might do on such a show. Maybe you are playing that game already! Every day you answer the trust question.

I know that it is very important to me that people trust me, and I feel hurt when someone does not trust me. In those cases, I usually reason that the person does not know me. They need to find out that I am capable and true to my word. You deserve that same trust.

Where did we get the idea that we can't trust people? What makes you think you can't trust yourself? Get past those voices that are giving the negative perspective! This relates to the concept of "innocent until proven guilty." Your life can be so much easier if you begin thinking "trustworthy until proven otherwise."

Trust is wrapped up with honesty and quality. Do you believe, honor, and respect the other person? Do you have the confidence that they will follow through on their commitments with quality work? Do you give yourself this same level of trust? If you are concerned about errors, do you trust that you can remedy the situation if there are mistakes?

Great managers reject the notion that trust must be earned. Marcus Buckingham and Curt Coffman debunk that theory in their book, "First Break All the Rules: What Great Managers Do Differently." Here is what they said about the great managers in their study. "They know if, fundamentally, you don't trust people, there is no line, no point in time, beyond which people suddenly become trustworthy. They believe that if you expect the best from people, then more often than not the best is what you get."

Begin with yourself. The wise philosopher Goethe said, "As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live."

Self-trust is the first secret of success.- Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Anna Watkins is a Career Coach with a special interest in group coaching and Master Mind Groups, networks of like minded people who support and help each other stay on track with their life goals. You can learn more about the resources she offers through her website: http://www.one-e-anna.com

Become A Mighty Oak

2008-04-24T09:48:00.000-07:00

Lets learn from nature

I have let my thoughts wander while trying to find an introduction to my young entrepreneurs meeting and I started thinking about nature [again] it seems that we can learn so much from the natural world if only we look.

The main thing that we forget is that we are part of this wonderful natural world. The first thing to consider is that everything in nature is programmed to become the best they can , plants, trees, animals, fish etc.. they are all pre programmed to achieve the very best status that they can. Like humans they encounter hurdles and obstacles, but they never change their programme. If a plant lacks water it withers and hangs on to life until it gets more water, the minute it gets more water it just carries on trying to achieve being the best it can. It does not say that was too hard I think I will just make do from now on.

When I thought about the humble acorn, I came up with a wonderful analogy. I have often said before that no one can tell an acorn that it will not grow into a mighty oak, but I had never considered the odds of it actually achieving its goal.

On one oak tree there are many thousands of acorns, they are all programmed to be very successful oak trees. Let us follow the journey of an acorn as it tries to fulfil its goal.

Once they fall to the ground things really start to hot up, squirrels start collecting them to store up for the winter, wild pigs eat them, birds start to eat them in fact things are looking a bit shaky.

The few who actually get blown or somehow arrive at a fertile place, start to germinate and take root. Once they are saplings they once again become food for various creatures.

So out of the thousands of acorns that fell from the tree, very few will actually reach their full potential.

What is the point of all this I hear you say.

Well the point is that although only a few acorns become big oak trees, if they had been blessed with a brain like us humans, I should think that the species would die out.

The actual hardships that they are faced with makes no difference to the individual acorn, because he has a programme that says he will grow into a mighty oak as soon as he is given the opportunity. He cannot think of what has happened to his brothers and sisters, and he cannot worry about what might happen once he germinates. He is only interested in becoming the best oak tree he can.

Once again I hear you saying Croz has finally lost it.

Well the difference between you and the acorn, is that you can position yourself at any time to reach your full potential. You are in control and not at the mercy of others.

If you just forgot about the past and all the negative programming and just said to yourself, I am going to be the best I can possibly be and achieve all I desire, and I will deal with any situation as it is presented, and not imagine things to solve, you too may become a mighty oak.

Croz is a talker and thinker. check out his website http://www.croz.com.au Also check out this website where Croz is helping a young lad earn one million dollars in one year http://www.thehappysecret.com

The World Awaits - You Need Only to Say Yes!

2008-04-24T09:46:00.000-07:00

Saying yes to life, to your gifts, to your birth right to experience life to the fullest, is a powerful affirmation we can say each day. I remember when I was young, and my mother would wake me up for school each morning, the first word I would utter with dread and anguish upon awakening was, "no." What a way to start off the day! Little did I know what I was creating for myself with the energy behind that one word. How many times do we say things that we wouldn't otherwise say if we realized the power and magnitude of the words we choose in the moment? Living consciously is challenging yet can truly change our lives. Every word we speak and every thought we focus on, sets the stage for the energy and experience of the day and ultimately, of our lives.

There's more to it than merely changing a word or perspective, however we have to start somewhere and that's one simple way we can effectively and instantly start to transform our experiences. Gratitude, presence, being in your heart, staying unconditionally compassionate with yourself and others, patience (since the only time restraints are those we contrive), and embracing everything as perfectly divine are ways we can go even further. It's quite the undertaking, but at least if we have the desire to experience life in this way, then we are half way there.

Part of the journey with all of this is to continually encourage ourselves to go a little further each day. To reach that one extra step, no matter how small. It's not easy, but can make a world of difference when we take the step to commit ourselves to the process, our path, the journey.

Gratitude is a wonderful starting point and when we come to understand the power of this and how it can change things drastically, amazing things begin to shift and take form from a simple perspective change. We are more than we give ourselves credit for and there is more waiting for us than we are aware. There is so much to be grateful for.

The world is a playground of possibilities and a canvas of diverse colors we have yet to discover. We become comfortable in our own worlds of existence, never realizing that across the globe, millions of people are sharing in this experience of life with us, right here and right now; people that are beautiful in every way and share a common thread of the pursuit of love and fulfillment. Expanding our horizons in whatever way relative to your experience and abilities is truly vital. Lessening up on mass information intake and opening up more to your own personal experience and to the beauty of the Universe is helpful.

Saying yes to life and to your right to experience it to the level of your own personal fulfillment is the key. Doors will magically open when we start to make changes and support and believe in our dreams. It starts with you.

Whatever your dream may be, have the courage to follow it and support it. It's a dream for a reason. Not merely to just stuff it all away to subdue your blues. We're alive for a reason. Not to just be in the physical, but to integrate it with the spiritual for an all-encompassing totality of experience. There is much out there to explore and if you have the desire, there is a way.

Tania Marie is a Reiki Master Teacher, Visionary Artist, & Host of Sacred Journeys to Egypt, residing in Incline Village, NV. For more information about her work and services please visit http://www.taniamarie.com or call (775) 343-9244. Treatments & classes available by distance or at Reno & Tahoe locations.

Feel Your Fear and Do It Anyway!

2008-04-24T09:45:00.000-07:00

How to Create Exciting Breakthroughs in your Work and your Life:

"How do you know if you can't do it, unless you try?" This is what Pablo, our adventure guide on a recent trip to Mexico said to me, as he looked me straight in the eyes. I was poised to repel down 40 feet in the air into a Mayan sink hole that was 39 feet deep. I was all harnessed up in my gear and my husband and two kids were already swimming in the water with the rest of our group of 8. All that was left was Susan from Texas, me, and our guide, Pablo. Susan decided she couldn't do it and left me facing Pablo. He repeated, "How do you know you can't do it, unless you try?"

This is actually an excellent question! My palms were sweating and waves of anxiety went through me. I decided to feel my fear and do it anyway! Pablo calmly encouraged me, "You can do it, chica!" I got into place and scaled the stone wall down into the cave, all the while white-knuckling it, as I lowered my rope slowly but surely. My confidence began to override my fear as I came closer and closer to achieving my goal. I did it!

Soon I was swimming in this ancient and sacred water hole. There is something quite marvelous, exhilarating and empowering, to dare yourself to do what scares your socks off! I'm so glad that I felt my fear and did it anyway! What scares you? Where could you take a big step forward in your business and/or your personal life? Perhaps you could:

Quit talking about a good idea and actually take massive action on that idea! Take on more opportunities to be more visible in the marketplace Go ahead and enroll in a high-end coaching program for 1st class mentoring from an expert. Perhaps it's your time to do more public speaking?

My coaching challenge to you this week is to choose something BIG that you'd like to do, be or have in your business or in your personal life and make a commitment to do it. Be smart and line up support. Without wise Pablo on my side, I probably wouldn't have dared to go beyond my comfort zone. So go for it! I encourage you to take on a challenging goal. Carpe Diem!

Learn more about Diana and receive your FREE Report, "3 Huge Mistakes People Like You Make to Sabotage Their Success & How You Can Completely Avoid Them!" and FREE subscription to "Life & Work Design Secrets" e-newsletter, please visit http://www.DianaLong.com.

The Basics Needed For Success

2008-04-23T12:33:00.001-07:00

Regardless of whether it is individual, group or team success we are pursuing there is wide array of skills, knowledge and passion needed to attain our prescribed definition of success. Each pursuit will be individually different depending on a number of issues involved. The individuals or team members involved, the environment in which you operate, the amount of competition that is chasing the same cherished prize.

Even with all of these individualities there are some constants as well. As with many other articles this is not meant to be an exhaustive list but a snapshot of some of the key areas that is associated with all pursuits of success.

The concept is to use this list to help you create your own. To take what has been outlined and expand upon it. I have heard many times that to be successful find someone that has done what you aspire to and do what they did.

I am not so sure about that. Obviously by doing this you will get close to the same result they have had. Nothing wrong with that? Sure, but how about we look at this concept. Look what has been done and how it was done and then think it through

to another level. This way the result you will achieve will be far superior to the original concept and result.

This is what I would like you to do with this list. Look at it understand it and how it relates to you. Expand upon it, rewrite it, but when you do rewrite it, do it to another level.

So here is a brief insight into some of the resources needed for success.

Time

Probably our most sacred commodity. How many times have you heard lack of time being used as reason for lack of performance?

Pursuing success takes time both, long term and short term. You need to workout a strategy of time usage. This strategy will need to take into account what amount of time you will need on a daily basis. You will also have to take into account how long you will need to pursue your success. If you have not planned you're time usage correctly and you find yourself short of time you will begin to take short cuts and make compromises to get what needs to be done in the reduced amount of time.

Understanding

What is this pursuit of success all about? What do I need to attain it. Who has done this in the past. Who can I use to help me. What are the pitfalls in this pursuit that I am about to undertake? When I achieve this success what am I going to get from it?

These and many other question should be asked and answered well before the pursuit of success begins. The better the understanding the better the planning, the better the planning the increased chances of attaining the success.

Skill

What skills are needed to attain the success we desire? Many times success has not been pursued because the people involved do not believe they posses the skills needed. They may well be right. But I see the gaining of the skills required as part of

the journey that success is.

As I said earlier the real key is to identify the skills needed and then do a balance sheet of the skills you have and the skills you may require.

Knowledge

What intellectual strengths do you have that is going to allow this pursuit of success to become reality? There is distinct difference here between understanding and knowledge.

Understanding is your insight to the general concept you are pursuing. Knowledge is part of the skill base you have that will help you achieve your desired result.

If your knowledge areas are lacking then the attainment of newfound knowledge becomes part of the process to attaining your success. No matter what knowledge you require there is fair chance it is documented somewhere all you need to do is being committed and resourceful in finding that knowledge.

Attitude

Take a minute here to think about people that you deem to be successful. What is there attitude like. Some are very much in your face others a little more laid back. But regardless of the public perception they all have to varying degrees an attitude.

Some take the time to share it with us where other keep it to themself. What you do is you're decision. But an attitude very much becomes a significant part of pursuing success. The one thing you need to be careful of don't let ego or attitude be mistaken for arrogance. Most of us can handle a healthy attitude very few of us can handle arrogance at any level.

Don't try to become something you are not, but a healthy dose of attitude will go along way to helping you achieve your success.

Support

Without doubt you will need help in your pursuit of success. This help can be in a variety of ways. Perhaps someone actually helping you on the day to day because of the skills they have. A group of people working as support group to help you through the good times and the bad.

Perhaps a mentor or a coach that will help you see the light when all you can see is darkness.

No doubt you are a talented individual but find the right people that can compliment your individual brilliance. Your success or the pursuit of it will be greatly enhanced by the support and input of others.

Commitment

Doesn't matter how much or to what degree you want what you do. Unless you have an absolute, no compromise, no questions asked commitment to your success and the things needed to achieve it there is fair chance you will come up short.

Now you like I have had first hand experience in seeing someone with very little effort achieve a significant result. How did they do it? It is a question I have asked myself many times, it is a question I have asked the people I have witnessed do it

many times. I am still no closer coming up with a definitive answer.

But I will say this if you are serious about pursuing success don't leave anything to chance. You will needed commitment and plenty of it. Commitment is easy in the early part when emotion is running high. Commitment is easy when things are going well.

Commitment is easy when you can see yourself getting closer to your desired result.

Commitment is really needed when none of the above is present. Commitment is needed when it seems like it is just you against all of the odds that are present. Commitment is needed when everything around is telling you that you cannot to attain your success.

Now what we have gone through are a few basic ingredients for success. Basic in concept, complex in instigation and exciting with the results they will bring. Success is about doing the basic thing exceptionally well and doing them consistently.

For More Information Visit http://www.totalperformance.com.au

Or Email us totalperformance@totalperformance.com.au

Bill Nelson is an elite international sporting coach who has turned his knowledge of developing peak team and individual performance into a world-class corporate consultancy, Total Performance Concepts Pty Ltd.

Bill's wisdom on the science of motivation, performance coaching and team building has been utilised by business organisations, defence forces, the real estate and telecommunications industries, educational institutions, local government, numerous businesses and elite sporting programs throughout the world.

Should Success Be Headstrong Or Heartfelt?

2008-04-23T12:31:00.000-07:00

Is success possessions or passion?

In Our western society success is inclined to be associated with possessions and material wealth. The saying;" The boys with the most toys, wins" is true; anyway according to the marketing media. Does our society as a whole, believe success is only a gauge of materialism? Have the merchants so mesmerized the people that we now relate to materialism as the criteria for success?

While money and material possessions can be an outward sign of personal or business success it does not define it. Success is; the accomplishment of personal, worthwhile goals." In this definition, success becomes a mind set or belief in a particular goal. . . no matter what it is. It is in this arena that we set the stage for accomplishment. What is viewed as success by our family, neighbors, friends and associates is the acquisition of material possessions as in size of home, type and how many cars, clothing, yacht, and so on.

The web is redefining success

The web is a prime example of relationship detachment. It breeds self-reflection, self-indulgence, self-importance and alienation from personal relationships. When you're main focus is on how much money you can make, you tend to become detached from the real world. Deceit, lies, and downright theft have become food for success on the web. Every "pitch page" looks the same, every email another come on. What happened to morals, values and honesty?

While money is viewed as an outward sign or measure of personal career or business success, it reflects only a small piece of the bigger picture that is life.

A successful life should encompass far more than work or finances, although they are an important part of the total picture. Success encompasses five areas for stability in a life experience.

The Wheel of Life.

1. Spiritual - your relationship with God and nature.

2. Family - your relationship with your family and the family of man.

3. Finances - financial independence, your ability to keep your finances in order

4. Physical - keeping fit to face life's challenges

5. Mental - staying mentally fit to better decipher right from wrong.

These five important characteristics are inborn traits of man as transferred from God. (let us make man in our image and likeness) Because humans were created with God like qualities they are pleasant in the sight of God. The senses, sound, taste, sight, feel, emotion, imagination, compassion, and pleasure are all regulated for our protection. God placed a threshold on the senses of humans so He could experience His creation through their relationship with it. For our own protection, God has isolated us by the shear vastness of His ever expanding creation. To God everything is normal, but to man it is only normal within his ability of acceptance.

Life is a unified experience

Fulfillment of life is realized when all five areas are in unison. Perhaps you should contemplate your own specific themes and objectives that define your personal success desire so that you can better know yourself and evaluate success on your own terms. As you think about what success means to you, ask yourself a few pertinent questions:

1. Do I Enjoy My Life Now?

Even though your life experience may not always be desirable, you can still experience happiness and satisfaction. Open your eyes to those things that bring you joy, and embrace them into your everyday life.

2. Am I Enriching Someone Else's Life?

Relationships become meaningful when you demonstrate caring and love while enriching their lives in the process. Perhaps your mission in life should be in reaching out through personal giving and talents to make a positive difference in someone else's life. It could be in the smallest thing like lending an attentive ear, or speaking words of encouragement when your spouse, child, coworker or friend is downhearted. Strive to make a difference to at least one person every single day.

3. Can I Take The Heat When Fronted With Challenges?

Sometimes life comes at you ninety miles per hour but it is only a journey of perceptions. If your perceptions become challenges or problems try telling yourself; "This is only a learning experience and I will be a better person because of it.," It's all in how are you perceiving the experience, you could continually feel frustrated and sorry for yourself but these perceptions would serve no gainful purpose. It is in facing challenges and persevering that you develop into a mature individual. It is in diversities you are able to increase your capacity for managing life and face the many opportunities you will encounter.

4. Do I already Have The Things I Need To Enjoy Life?

To "enjoy life" may have different meanings for different people. Enjoying life is a mindset and something you have control over, so you should set your goal to enjoy life with abundance. God supplies abundance for you to take advantage of. He only ask for you to be a good and thankful steward. It is ok to make it a goal to strive for abundance in your life; whether it be money, relationships, time, love, or resources. Living in abundance means you can donate money and time when appropriate and still focus clearly on your goals. It is an empowerment that you can share with those you love and admire. You are able to give freely of yourself, your time, abilities, as you reach out in love and generosity.

5. Am I Successful In The Eyes Of GOD?

The litmus test is if you have it in your heart to focus on what's important in life while viewing it from a spiritual perspective. Since everything is borrowed from God, can you then Love Him with all your heart, all your soul, and with all your mind; and love your neighbor as yourself? When you look in the mirror what is reflected? Does success come from the heart or is it only a means to an end? Ask yourself if you are successful because, you're thankful and giving.

You have but one life, live it well.

Don't let anyone plot your destiny or define success for you. Your definition of success is your character and purpose. Take the time now to reach into your heart and create your own meaning. What does success mean to you? Do you have the courage to stand up to your own measure of success and display it for the world to see? By what standards will you gauge what is meaningful for your life?

Happy Trails

Donald Yates, Former Director of Business and Leadership Development for Imperial Research, is now retired but continues to assist young people in engaging life through self discovery, Life course planning, intuitiveness and fulfillment. Learn how you can build a powerful organization of your own. To learn more, visit http://www.clean4profit.com and http://www.rockeriders.com

Self Confidence - Eight Little Words That Will Pick Up Your Confidence!

2008-04-18T10:00:00.000-07:00

After a rather difficult day during a hectic week, I decided to have a "comfort" evening. For me, this means crawling into my oldest most comfortable pajamas, fixing a favorite meal, and watching a well- loved movie. My choice this time was Bridget Jones's Diary as it always makes me laugh and I think Colin Firth is a real hunk.

I have a favorite scene. It's where Bridget gets stuck eating dinner with a group of friends, most of whom are married. They give her a hard time about being single. As she gets ready to leave, Mark Darcy (Colin Firth) comes down the stairs and bumbles through a speech about how he likes her even though he shouldn't. Their conversation is pure "Pride and Prejudice," but one line he says always brings tears to my eyes.

He says to Bridget, "I like you just the way you are."

When I hear this line, I always think it is the best pick up line there ever was. Every man should memorize it. I told this to my boyfriend and laughingly said he needed to say this to me more often. He smiled a mischievous grin and said, "This is a line you need to say to yourself more often."

He's a wise man, that boyfriend of mine and so right! As a great believer in the power of affirmations, I decided that every morning when I get up and look in the mirror, I will say "I like ME just the way I am!"

I've been practicing this affirmation for quite awhile and I have found it helpful. I admit there are days when I look in the mirror and it is really hard to get the affirmation out. But I've learned to make myself say it with gusto, even if it makes me laugh.

If you struggle with self-confidence, why not try this. It can't hurt. Say it right now "I like ME just the way I am!" Okay, now say it again with even more feeling. Keep saying it over and over until you feel the power of these eight little words.

It's okay not to believe these words right away. I know I struggle with it sometimes. I think it's because it takes time to quiet those old voices, who like Bridget's married friends, like to remind us of where we fall short. But I really believe if we just keep repeating the phrase, eventually we will convince our minds to believe it.

And there is scientific evidence that supports this. Evidently, you really can teach your mind to believe something you say over and over again. Then again, this ought to make sense. Many of us learned the negative things we believe about ourselves because someone told them to us over and over again. So, why wouldn't positive affirmations work?

I plan to keep practicing these eight little words and I encourage you to give them a try, as well. Who knows you may find your self-confidence begins to grow the more you repeat the words! For my part, I will get up tomorrow morning, look in the mirror at my squashed hair, sleep wrinkled face and say "I like ME just the way I am!"

It's the best pick ME up line there ever was!

Sara Healy is a life coach who helps people with life and career transitions using their strengths and values. Find out how she can help you make positive changes in your life by contacting her at: http://www.sarahealy.com