http://feeds.feedburner.com/SelfgrowthcomArticlesForPositivePsychology The #1 Self Improvement Site On The Web, as Ranked by Google and Yahoo en https://selfgrowth.com/articles/embrace-fragility <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> The truth of anything is like a mosaic with many tiles, many parts. One part of the truth of things is that they are robust and enduring, whether it's El Capitan in Yosemite or the love of a child for her mother and father. Another part of the truth is that things bruise, tear, ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 30 Mar 2026 12:11:59 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/lighten-up-0 <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> On the path of life, most of us are hauling way too much weight. What's in your own backpack? If you're like most of us, you've got too many items on each day's To-Do list and too much stuff in the closet. Too many entanglements with other people. And too many "shoulds," worries, ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 16 Mar 2026 11:45:51 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/see-progress <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> There are always things that are getting worse. For example, over the past year, you probably know someone who has become unemployed or ill or both, and there’s more carbon in the atmosphere inexorably heating up the planet. But if you don’t recognize what’s improving in your own life, ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 2 Mar 2026 2:08:22 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/trust-in-love <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Take a breath right now, and notice how abundant the air is, full of life-giving oxygen offered freely by trees and other green growing things. You can't see air, but it's always available for you. Love is a lot like the air. It may be hard to see - but it's in you and all around ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 23 Feb 2026 11:10:51 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/dont-rain-on-the-parade <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Let's say you've had an interesting idea or moment of inspiration, or thought of a new project, or felt some enthusiasm bubbling up inside you. Your notions are not fully formed and you're not really committed to them yet, but they have promise and you like them and are trying them on for ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 16 Feb 2026 1:04:06 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/receive-generosity <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Life gives to each one of us in so many ways. For starters, there’s the bounty of the senses – including chocolate chip cookies, jasmine, sunsets, wind singing through pine trees, and just getting your back scratched. What does life give you? Consider the kindness of ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 9 Feb 2026 11:39:49 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/minimize-painful-experiences <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Painful experiences range from subtle discomfort to extreme anguish - and there is a place for them. Sorrow can open the heart, anger can highlight injustices, fear can alert you to real threats, and remorse can help you take the high road next time. But is there really any shortage of ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 19 Jan 2026 11:42:37 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/dont-be-intimidated <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Humans evolved to be fearful, since anxiety helped keep our ancestors alive. Consequently, we are vulnerable to being alarmed, manipulated, and even intimidated by threats, both real ones and “paper tigers.” This vulnerability to feeling threatened has effects at many levels, ranging ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 12 Jan 2026 1:38:46 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/dont-quarrel <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> It's one thing to stick up for yourself and others. But it's a different matter to get caught up in wrangles, contentiousness, squabbles . . . in a word: quarrels. Similarly, it's one thing to disagree with someone, even to the point of arguing - but it's a different matter to get so ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 5 Jan 2026 11:38:32 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/2026-as-the-tide-begins-to-turn-the-quickening-phase-iv-is-upping-our-game-to-ride-the-cosm <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d-->TO ACTIVATE ALL LINKS AND VIEW ALL IMAGES (RECOMMENDED): https://joanpancoe.com/2025/12/17/2026-as-the-tide-begins-to-turn-the-quickening-phase-iv-is-upping-our-game-to-ride-the-cosmic-wave/ LISTEN ALONG ON YOUTUBE: https://youtu.be/AYZ1QTXyTow "Embrace the 10,000 beautiful things and ... joanpancoe@aol.com Wed, 24 Dec 2025 2:02:28 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/forgive <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Forgiveness is a tricky topic. First, it has two distinct meanings: To give up resentment or anger To pardon an offense; to stop seeking punishment or recompense Here, I am going to focus on the first meaning, which is broad enough to include situations where ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 15 Dec 2025 11:10:08 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/say-thanks <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> What do you feel when someone thanks you for something? For a comment in a meeting, a task done at home, an extra step taken, an encouraging word. You probably feel seen, appreciated, that you matter to the other person. Maybe a little startled, maybe wondering if you really deserve ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 8 Dec 2025 10:37:10 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/speak-truly <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> It's been said that the most powerful tool for physical health is a fork (or spoon), since the choices you make with it determine the good or bad things you put into your body. In the same way, perhaps the most powerful tool for your mental health - and certainly for the health of your ... marion@rickhanson.net Tue, 2 Dec 2025 1:42:43 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/keep-your-eyes-on-the-prize-1 <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Have you heard this saying? The most important thingis to remember the most important thing. What are the most important things to you? In your life as a whole? During a particular interaction with someone? Right this minute? The most important things often get pushed to ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 24 Nov 2025 10:56:07 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/give-no-one-cause-to-fear <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> We evolved to be afraid. The ancient ancestors that were casual and blithely hopeful, underestimating the risks around them - predators, loss of food, aggression from others of their kind - did not pass on their genes. But the ones that were nervous were very successful - and we are ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 10 Nov 2025 2:58:00 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/try-a-softer-tone <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Linguists like Deborah Tannen have pointed out that most communications have three elements: Explicit content – “There is no milk in the refrigerator.” Emotional subtext – Could be irritation, blame, accusation An implicit statement about the nature of the relationship – ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 3 Nov 2025 10:19:20 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/see-the-good-in-others <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Many interactions these days have a kind of bumper-car quality to them. At work, at home, on the telephone, via email: we sort of bounce off of each other while we exchange information, smile or frown, and move on. How often do we actually take the extra few seconds to get a sense of what's ... marion@rickhanson.net Sun, 19 Oct 2025 1:42:54 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/ask-questions <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> My dad grew up on a ranch in North Dakota. He had a saying from his childhood - you may have heard it elsewhere - that's: "You learn more by listening than by talking." Sure, we often gain by thinking aloud, including discovering our truth by speaking it. But on the whole, listening ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 6 Oct 2025 4:26:53 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/stay-right-when-youre-wronged <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> It’s easy to treat people well when they treat you well. The real test is when they treat you badly. (Much of what I say here applies to concerns about injustice or mistreatment that threatens or happens to others, from someone bullying a child to an oppressive government, but I will focus on ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 15 Sep 2025 12:18:28 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/feel-cared-about <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Everyone knows what it’s like to care about someone. Remember being with a friend, a mate, a pet: you feel warmly connected and want him or her not to suffer and to be happy. On the other hand, you’ve probably had the sense, at one time or another, of not being cared about. That you ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 8 Sep 2025 11:09:33 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/speak-from-the-heart <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> One Christmas I hiked down into the Grand Canyon, whose bottom lay a vertical mile below the rim. Its walls were layered like a cake, and a foot-high stripe of red or gray rock indicated million-plus years of erosion by the Colorado River. Think of water - so soft and gentle - gradually ... marion@rickhanson.net Tue, 2 Sep 2025 1:38:29 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/tune-into-others <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Imagine a world in which people interacted with each other like ants or fish. Imagine a day at work like this, or in your family, aware of the surface behavior of the people around you but oblivious to their inner life while they remain unmoved by your own. That's a world without ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 25 Aug 2025 11:34:39 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/be-friendly <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Friendliness is a down-to-earth approach to others that is welcoming and positive. Think about a time when someone was friendly to you - maybe drawing you into a gathering, saying hello on the sidewalk, or smiling from across the room. How did that make you feel? Probably more included, ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 18 Aug 2025 12:13:35 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/have-compassion <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Compassion is essentially the wish that beings do not suffer - from subtle physical and emotional discomfort to agony and anguish - combined with feelings of sympathetic concern. You could have compassion for an individual (a friend in the hospital, a co-worker passed over for a ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 11 Aug 2025 1:30:31 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/tell-the-truth-play-fair <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Perhaps like you, I’ve been worrying lately about what it will take for all of us to live together in peace. I remember what I’ve heard many teachers say to their students: Tell the truth. Play fair. This is what we ask our own kids to do. It’s what we look for in a friend, a ... marion@rickhanson.net Wed, 6 Aug 2025 5:36:48 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/us-all-thems <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> By “us” all “thems,” I mean finding common ground with every person – especially those you fear or are angry with or&nbsp;who are simply very different from you. These days this practice is more important than ever. For most of the past 300,000 years, our human ancestors lived in small ... marion@rickhanson.net Sun, 27 Jul 2025 3:49:27 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/adaptable-leadership-for-our-vuca-world <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d-->Adaptable Leadership for our VUCA World By Bill Cottringer In today’s world of volatility, uncertainty, constant change and ambiguity (VUCA), leaders are being challenged to develop an adaptive approach to coaching others in the organization buy demonstrating essential authentic ... ckuretdoc@comcast.net Fri, 25 Jul 2025 5:10:57 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/overcoming-negative-thought-patterns-0 <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d-->Humans are meant to feel and experience a wide range of emotions. Growing older has taught us that not everything is as bright and sunny as it seems. While we hope that the good days outnumber the bad, each experience is integral to our journey. As we navigate through the ups and downs of ... info@pauljenkin.net Thu, 24 Jul 2025 5:01:59 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/learn-as-you-go <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> My top five inner practices, and here they are: Drop the stone Let it flow Learn as you go “Us” all “thems” Be amazed By “learn as you go,” I mean that each day is an opportunity to take in the good: to help useful or enjoyable experiences sink in ... marion@rickhanson.net Sun, 20 Jul 2025 3:24:45 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/let-it-flow <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> I think there are five key things we can do inside ourselves to be happier, stronger, wiser, and more loving this year: Drop the stone Let it flow Learn as you go “Us” all “thems” Be Amazed Previously, I explored the first of these: how to lay down ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 30 Jun 2025 10:59:36 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/drop-the-stone <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> As we begin a new year for many people, it’s natural to consider how to make it a good one. Besides taking action in the outer world – from fixing a dripping faucet to feeding every child – we can act inside our own minds . . . and take the benefits with us wherever we go. This year, what do ... marion@rickhanson.net Wed, 25 Jun 2025 10:26:21 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/the-almighty-self <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d-->THE ALMIGHTY SELF by Bill Cottringer Today I am graduating into my second year of my ninth decade of living life. So, I think I will venture down this rabbit hole for some profound insights into life, at least as far down the rabbit hole my current brain power will allow me to tiptoe. ... ckuretdoc@comcast.net Mon, 16 Jun 2025 5:30:53 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/jupiter-exalted-our-saviors-walk-among-us <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> TO ACTIVATE ALL LINKS AND VIEW ALL IMAGES (RECOMMENDED): https://joanpancoe.com/2025/05/24/jupiter-exalted-our-saviors-walk-among-us/ LISTEN ALONG ON YOUTUBE https://www.youtube.com/@joanpancoemodernmystic1357 “The entire Universe is my true personality” —Anonymous Zen ... joanpancoe@aol.com Mon, 26 May 2025 12:43:00 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/love-your-neighbor <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> This practice might sound extreme or pushy, and I want to tell you what I mean by it. Everyone has lots of neighbors, and they come in many shapes and sizes. Obviously, the people living across the street are neighbors, but in some sense, so are the people you live with. Friends, ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 26 May 2025 10:36:27 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/stand-up-to-bullies <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Humans are profoundly social. Woven through the tapestry of our relationships are several major threads. One of these is power. The only question is, do we use it for good or ill? The abuse of power can be called many things, including intimidation, fraud, discrimination, and tyranny. ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 19 May 2025 10:41:02 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/love-whats-real <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Because this practice could seem so abstract or so obvious that it’s not worth doing, I am going to take longer than usual to explain why it’s so important. As I grew up, my family and schools felt like shaky ground. I didn’t understand why my parents and many kids reacted the ways they ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 12 May 2025 9:48:22 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/enjoy-the-good-that-lasts <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Why? So many things change. Leaves fall, friends move away, and children leave home. My dad died some years ago, and my mom about ten years before that. I don’t know about you, but I’m getting older (darn, there is no fooling the mirror). The world changes, too. Evolving ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 5 May 2025 9:57:43 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/beware-of-anger <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Anger is tricky. On the one hand, anger – feeling annoyed, irritated, resentful, fed up, mad, outraged, or enraged – alerts us to real threats, real injuries, and real wrongs that need correcting, and it energizes and fuels us to do something about them. In my family growing up, my ... marion@rickhanson.net Sun, 4 May 2025 5:33:05 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/welcome-joy <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Positive emotions – such as feelings of gratitude, love, and confidence – strengthen the immune system, protect the heart against loss and trauma, build relationships, increase resilience, and promote success. Based on studies that have already been done, if a drug company could patent a ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 14 Apr 2025 10:45:33 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/find-your-ground <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> I've been to New Zealand, and really respect and like it. There's a Maori term - turangawaewae, "a place to stand" - that I've come back to many times. I'm sure I don't know the full meaning of the word in its cultural context. But at a basic level, it's clear that we all need a place ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 7 Apr 2025 11:27:18 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/love-someone <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d-->Sometimes something happens. Perhaps your sweet old cat takes a turn for the worse, or there’s a money problem, or your son waves goodbye as he gets on a plane to start college on the other side of the country. Sometimes it’s on a larger scale: maybe there’s been an election, and you’re ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 31 Mar 2025 10:51:12 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/take-heart <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> It takes heart to live in even ordinary times. By “taking heart,” I mean several related things: Sensing your heart and chest Finding encouragement in what is good both around you and inside you Resting in your own warmth, compassion, and kindness; resting in the ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 24 Mar 2025 10:26:57 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/recognize-suffering-in-others <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d-->We’re usually aware of our own suffering, which – broadly defined – includes the whole range of physical and mental discomfort, from mild headache or anxiety to the agony of bone cancer or the anguish of losing a child. (Certainly, there is more to life than suffering, including great joy and ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 17 Mar 2025 10:22:11 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/trust-yourself-3 <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> As I grew up, at home and school it felt dangerous to be myself - my whole self, including the parts that made mistakes, got rebellious and angry, goofed around too loudly, or were awkward and vulnerable. Not dangers of violence, as many have faced, but risks of being punished in other ... marion@rickhanson.net Tue, 11 Mar 2025 11:19:41 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/be-at-peace-with-the-pain-of-others <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Humans are an empathic, compassionate, and loving species, so it is natural to feel sad, worried, or fiery about the troubles and pain of other people. (And about those of cats and dogs and other animals, but I'll focus on human beings here.) Long ago, the Buddha spoke of the "first ... marion@rickhanson.net Tue, 4 Mar 2025 10:48:41 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/be-amazed <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> Here are my top five inner practices for helping this year be a good one for you and others (click the links to see the first four): Drop the stone Let it flow Learn as you go “Us” all “thems" Be amazed By “be amazed,” I mean staying open to a ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 24 Feb 2025 9:58:36 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/be-mind-full-of-good <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> It's kind of amazing: right now, what you think and feel, enjoy and suffer, is changing your brain. The brain is the organ that learns, designed by evolution to be changed by our experiences: what scientists call experience-dependent neuroplasticity. Neurons that fire together, wire ... marion@rickhanson.net Tue, 18 Feb 2025 1:21:24 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/kindness-to-you-is-kindness-to-me-kindness-to-me-is-kindness-to-you <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> I usually describe a practice as something to do: get on your own side, see the being behind the eyes, take in the good, etc. This practice is different: it's something to recognize. From this recognition, appropriate action will follow. Let me explain. Some years ago, I was invited to ... marion@rickhanson.net Tue, 4 Feb 2025 2:34:16 pm https://selfgrowth.com/articles/grow-a-key-inner-strength <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> We all have issues - including demands upon us, stresses, illnesses, losses, vulnerabilities, and pain. (As Alan Watts put it: "Life is wiggly.") Of course, many of our issues - in the broad sense I'm using the word here - are related to important sources of fulfillment, such as starting a ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 27 Jan 2025 10:38:57 am https://selfgrowth.com/articles/eat-right <!--7809d7e227d74f2cb6edb1ca2739d10d--> The easiest and usually most effective way to replenish your body is through good nutrition. Most of us have a diet that is very different from the one that we are adapted to through millions of years of evolution - a diet of mainly vegetables, fruits, nuts, and meat. Humans first ... marion@rickhanson.net Mon, 20 Jan 2025 12:37:48 pm