Semper Wifey

Adieu!

2014-02-11T21:22:00.000-06:00

To my lovely readers,

After much prayer and consideration, Semper Wifey is shutting down. It's been an incredible six years in the blogging world, and I am proud to be considered one of the first "military wife bloggers" out there. I've grown leaps and bounds in my faith, my writing, and just in myself through this blog. I've met and read many wonderful bloggers and am so grateful for everything I learned from them.

Thank you all for your incredible support throughout the years. I hope you'll continue to pray for me as I continue to focus on my family and pursuing other writing endeavors.

"Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow." -William Shakespeare

A Christmas homecoming...

2013-12-16T15:25:00.000-06:00

When homecoming meets Christmas, it is very merry, indeed!

My sweet friend, Hadassah, from Whimsical Walls Art sent this awesome car decal to me for our homecoming. It's fully customizable and added that touch of whimsy that I just love to our car. I loved all the smiles and waves this brought when we were driving to pick up Hubby, and Hubby loved that even the car was decorated for his homecoming. It was so easy to apply and remove. I'll definitely save it for our next homecoming...and maybe even for some random day that I want some more of those great smiles from strangers. ;) Whimsical Walls Art is a homecoming shopping MUST!!!

Card Store generously let me choose and design a homecoming card for Hubby! I chose one with mistletoe because, well, a military homecoming and Christmas just screams "mistletoe!" Card Store lets you customize greeting cards for any occasion or "just because" reason! You can choose a design and/or upload your own picture, write a message, and they'll even mail it for you! It couldn't be simpler to create a personalized greeting card!

The Albums {Review}...

2013-12-16T09:05:00.000-06:00

The Albums is a new photo sharing site with a goal of housing lasting memories in a user friendly and beautiful online setting. Founders Andrew and Sarah sought to capture the essence of flipping through old family photo albums at a relative's house, drinking a cup of coffee, and reminiscing about each memory in the album.

 "What we wanted was a place built just for families that could capture the feeling of looking through those old photo albums," explained Andrew and Sarah. "Not necessarily as a storage site for every single one of the pictures we take, but as a place to keep and remember our favorite moments and to share them with our best friends and our families at home."

I recently had the opportunity to try out The Albums. The simplicity of it's conception, design, and ease of use is remarkable. You can see my album here.

I totally get the old photo album/coffee/reminiscing vibe that Andrew and Sarah were going for when they created The Albums. This will definitely be a lasting picture legacy for your family. And for us military families, one less physical photo album to pack up and move every PCS. :)

Start your free trial here!

Maternity style {Semper Stylish}...

2013-12-06T09:27:00.000-06:00

No, I haven't been pregnant in a while. (Confession: I forgot to post this months ago.) I usually loved getting dressed when I was pregnant because it made me be really creative. I found that just a few maternity shirts, belly band, wedges, belt, and/or big ol' earrings, could turn most of my clothes into some stylish maternity wear.

Now, for your viewing pleasure...I give you my maternity style. ;)

And lest you think I always look so adorable, it's only fair for me to show you what I wore a lot of the time.

Kids Cork {Review}...

2013-12-05T17:01:00.000-06:00

When I was first approached about reviewing Kids Cork, I was skeptical because, well, everything they offer on their site are things that my family already uses in a variety of media formats--private Facebook albums for pictures, Hallmark recordable books, iPhone for games). However, when I signed up for Kids Cork and started using it, I realized that this comprehensive site offers so much on one site to help military families stay connected. "KidsCork.com is an easy, affordable way to stay connected to children in your life who you love, but maybe cannot see every day. Simply create an account, log in, and record a story book your child or grandchild can listen to when it’s convenient!" (from www.kidscork.com) And it's free for military families!

Once you register for Kids Cork and start your own cork board, it's so cute and easy to use, even for kids. You and your invited contributors can upload and share pictures, record yourself reading a book to the kids, learn about the state/country where other relatives are living or are deployed to, and the kids have a variety of online games they can play. I like this site and service because I don't have to make complicated Facebook privacy settings to share pictures with family and I don't have to buy a $30 Hallmark book to ship to a family member to record a reading. It's all right there on our family cork board!

Setting up our family cork board with sticky notes, uploading photos, and recording books.

“We have a kid-friendly website that allows parents to pre-record themselves reading their kids a book at night,” said Justin Butler, Founder of KidsCork.com. “When their kid wants to be read a story, they go to the corkboard, open the book, and listen to the parent reading as the pages turn seamlessly along. We wanted to keep it simple for kids, simple for parents. Most of all, we wanted to keep that warmth, the closeness that exists between parent and child, no matter how great the distance.”

Learning about the country Daddy was flying missions in.

Kids Cork is a cute website that can help keep families involved with each other even when they're far apart. And did I mention it's FREE for military families? :)

Geek chic...

2013-12-05T09:11:00.003-06:00

Nerdy eyeglasses are so in right now, and the only way I could be more excited about that is if I actually needed to wear glasses full time. A few years ago I went to the optometrist to see about reading glasses because I was getting headaches after spending so much time reading and writing. I was so excited to receive my first eyeglasses prescription after my exam! It was even more exciting to know that I would get to shop for eyeglasses frames!

Sadly, the shop keeper didn't share the same enthusiasm as me. "I want 'sexy secretary' glasses," I told the lady in the shop. She gave me a weird look and let me choose between two pairs. I was completely bummed at the lack of choices, but I chose what I thought was the "sexiest" of the two, and the unenthusiastic sales lady got them ready for me. I'm still not sure why she wasn't as excited as I was about my eyeglasses. ;)

Thank goodness for online eyeglasses stores like GlassesUSA where I can buy glasses without bubble-bursting sales ladies and also have more than two choices. I'll be using them when I update my "sexy secretary" glasses to "sexy nerd" or "geek chick" glasses soon. Heck, I'll probably just order some frames without prescriptions so everyone will think I'm smart. ;) A girl's gotta be fashionable in all of her accessories, including eyeglasses!

What do y'all think of these frames? These glasses could totally go with my tons of stuff in my closet.

Photo from GlassesUSA
Take 10% off any order of prescription glasses with code: Blog10

This post was sponsored by GlassesUSA.

Advice with some oomph...

2013-12-01T22:04:00.000-06:00

Throughout my years as a military wife, I've received a lot of "fluff" advice. Things like: stay busy to pass the time, live today like he deploys tomorrow, think of the military life like an adventure, and the like. While these are great tidbits of useful advice, there's never a lot of oomph behind them. The bearer of such advice usually follows or precedes this advice with a shrug of the shoulders, a lopsided sympathetic smile, and a pat on the back. So when I get a real, honest dose of advice teeming with conviction and passion from a seasoned military wife, I take it to heart.

A while back I ran into one of the older wives in the squadron who I respect very much. She asked if I was going to the squadron wives' event that night. I hesitated. Do I make up an excuse or should I be honest with her about why I wasn't going to the event that night? I always ooze emotion, so I told her that I wasn't going, not because I couldn't find a sitter or because I had made other plans, but because I really just needed a break from the big group. With pursed lips and a nod of complete understanding, she replied, "I totally get it. Take a break. But don't stay away too long. You never know who needs to see or talk to sweet, Christian Wifey at these events."

I was completely shocked at her response for three reasons: 1) military wives are rarely honest enough with each other to dish that kind of advice, 2) I was humbly surprised at her description of me, and 3) it made me realize that socialization within the military isn't just about getting my needs for friendship met, but about being there for others.

I was thrilled at the freedom that this wife "allowed" me, and at the same time was motivated to get back to the group because of what she said. I didn't go to the event that night because I really did need a break from the big group, but I didn't stay away as long as I originally intended.

I have heeded this bit of advice on my blog as well. Sometimes I get frustrated with it, at the amount of effort and lack of feedback. So I take a break to refresh and regroup and have the confidence that God is using this little ol' blog for greater purposes than I'm always aware of. It's not about being the most popular or saying the cleverest thing or getting a bajillion comments, but about encouraging other military wives, even if it's just one wife.

So I'm still here. Tip-tapping away on my computer, praying that the military wife that needs a bit of encouragement can find it here.

The (Tough Love) Military Wife Survival Guide {Review}...

2013-12-01T22:02:00.001-06:00

The (Tough Love) Military Wife Survival Guide is a book written by a well-meaning military wife, S. M. Westerlie. This book offers practical advice for the brand new military wife including common acronyms, PCS tips, and marriage and friendship advice.

I read the book in about an hour, and most of the information given was "duh" for me since we've been doing the military thing for a while.

While The (Tough Love) Military Wife Survival Guide doesn't bring anything new to the military wife dialogue or book circuit, Westerlie clearly has a passion for military wives and wanting to see them succeed. I appreciate and respect that. She tells the reader what to expect in the military lifestyle in terms of deployment, other wives, and base housing.

This book is perfect for a brand new military wife or fiancé. It sums up the basics of the military lifestyle in 80 easy-to-read pages.

50% off at the Semper Wifey Shop!!!

2013-11-29T14:13:00.001-06:00

♫ It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas! Sales in every store! ♫

50% off with code: LUVU50

Semper Wifey has decked the halls of Etsy and is ready for Christmas sales! Stock up on notecards as small gifts for friends, stocking stuffers, and gift tags. And don't forget to snag some thank you notes for after Christmas!
Bringing humor and ♫ joy to the world ♫ via whimsical notecards!

Pity! Party of one!

2013-11-27T21:52:00.000-06:00

Yes, this is my Thanksgiving post.

This is the first ever holiday that I'll be spending by myself. And that was by design. I decided to throw myself a good ol'-fashioned pity party for Thanksgiving.

I decided not to go "home" for Thanksgiving because, after 6 airplane trips with my sons over the course of this deployment, I just couldn't stand the thought of traveling any more. Now I will spend the day enjoying the home that God provided for us. The windows will be open, football will be on TV, and the smell of my own personal pumpkin pie baking in the oven will fill our home.

I decided not to go "home" for Thanksgiving because after months of deployment and extensions and "I don't know"s, I just couldn't stand the thought of explaining to lots of people (individually, of course) where Hubby is, what he's doing, when he's coming home, or how sad it is that he's missing the holidays. Instead, I will spend the day playing with my little boys, talking about what we'll do as a family when Hubby comes home, take and email him silly pictures of the family...and eat my pumpkin pie.

I decided not to go "home" for Thanksgiving because I really just needed a break from the reminder that my family is separated, and has been for a long time. No explanations, no questions, no insensitive comments. Now I'll spend the day explaining to Boy 1 why he can't just eat cereal all day, telling him where his yellow choo choo is after he asks me ten times, and removing Boy 1's hair from Boy 2's hand (such an insensitive baby).

I decided not to go "home" for Thanksgiving because I just needed to be alone during this time. I've been following the advice of every military wife ever that says to stay busy during a deployment. So I have kept me and my little boys very busy. And now I'm tired and need time to just sit by myself and feel the emotions of the deployment. Once the boys are snuggly tucked into their beds, there will probably be wine, a sappy movie...and my own personal pumpkin pie.

Deployed: The Survival Guide for Families at War {Review}...

2013-11-06T22:00:00.000-06:00

Dr. Stanley Hall is a marriage and family therapist who has worked with military members suffering from PTSD and Traumatic Brain Injury. In his recently published book, Deployed: The Survival Guide for Families at War, Dr. Hall offers a hybrid of marriage and family counseling research and tips as it specifically applies to active duty military members and their families.

I found this book to be beneficial to the military family because it discusses basic marriage and family issues, such as communication and parenting, using examples that military families can relate to. While I didn't agree with some of his opinions or advice, Dr. Hall seems to understand the struggles that military families face. Indeed, his education and experience with the military allows Deployed to have much more depth than many other books that are written for military families.

There's no pink camo or tongue-in-cheek witticisms in Deployed: The Survival Guide for Families at War. However, if you're looking for a no-frills book about being married in the military, this is it.

What to wear to a black-tie wedding...

2013-11-06T21:43:00.000-06:00

I chose this Shabby Apple dress to wear to a black tie wedding. I didn't want to look like I was going to prom or another military ball, so I went with (what I hope was) sleek elegance. I love the 70s/80s look of this dress, and I guess others did too because I got a ridiculous number of compliments on it. Best part is that it was practically wadded up in my suitcase and still managed to look fresh when I put it on. My jewel-encrusted shoes didn't fare so well. :/

Linking here and here.

Unicorns in the desert...

2013-10-25T16:17:00.002-05:00

While Hubby was deployed, I got a call one afternoon. I usually screen all calls from unknown numbers, but something told me to go ahead and answer it.

"Hey," the voice on the other end said.

My mind raced trying to recognize the voice. I stalled by saying a very enthusiastic "hey." I should have known immediately who it was, but when your husband is stationed on an aircraft carrier in the middle of the ocean and the number on your phone is from the states, it can cause some confusion.

Due to some mechanical issues with his aircraft, he had to divert to a base on land, and because the aircraft needed a few repairs, he would have to stay for a bit.

Maybe it was exhaustion from a long flight. Maybe it was the adrenaline rush from a scary flight. Maybe it was the frustration of having a broken aircraft. Maybe it was the heat of his diversion location. Whatever it was, that man decided to tell me that his temporary lodging in country had recently been under rocket attack from the enemy.

"You shouldn't have told me that," I said, wondering why he broke our rule of censoring the scary stuff until he's been safe for a while.

"Oh, I mean, we're just hanging out having a pool party," he backtracked.

"Don't say pool party." He had recently told me about some allegedly inappropriate pool parties that some guys from the boat had gone to at their last port.

"OK," he laughed. "I mean there are just unicorns prancing around shooting out rainbows."

"Don't say shooting."

"OK. Just unicorns. There are just unicorns here."

Then we both laughed, and that laughter instantly eased the tension both of us were feeling because of this situation. I'm so thankful to have a husband that can make me laugh even in the scariest of circumstances. Just writing about this makes me laugh! :)

My Special Force {Review}...

2013-10-16T22:05:00.000-05:00

I am honored to have had the opportunity to review Heather Means' new book, My Special Force. Her story is a heartbreaking one. In her memoir-type book, Means recounts falling in love with her Army husband, their whirlwind romance, wedding, military life, and babies. While Heather was anticipating Ryan's homecoming from Iraq, she received news that Ryan was indeed coming home, but not in the physical state she had imagined. Heather's story continues as she faithfully stands by her husband as he bravely fought the cancer that would ultimately take his life.

Heather says of herself that, "writing this story has served as a source of healing for me and has allowed me to keep Ryan's legacy alive--for our children and as a source of inspiration for other. Ryan transformed my life, and I hope readers will be able to learn from him--in the way he lived and in his death."

My Special Force is a beautiful memento for Ryan's children, family, and close friends as it recounts intimate details of his enthusiastic spirit while serving his country and while fighting for his life. That his wife has chosen to honor him in this way after his death is touching.

TBS fashion {Semper Stylish}...

2013-09-26T14:51:00.001-05:00

This Semper Stylish post is brought to you by the Quantico TBS Marines. Oorah, 2nd Lts. ;)

Boy1 stylin' in his wannabe TBS wear.

Giveaway to bring awareness to "Stop Soldier Suicide"...

2013-09-23T12:06:00.001-05:00

Fashion designer and former Marine Antonio Centeno of Real Men Real Style is helping to raise awareness and money for a cause that is near and dear to his heart. Antonio experienced the loss of two friends to suicide, and recently experienced the loss of his sister in the same way. He is coping and grieving for his loved ones by using his "business to raise funds for causes which [he] feels are force multipliers for the fight against suicide."

Antonio created a limited number of silk ties that honor each military branch. For every tie sold, he will donate $50 to Stop Soldier Suicide, a non-profit organization that exists to curb suicide attempts among US Soldiers and Veterans.

The ties retail for $79, but buyers can receive a $30 discount by entering the promo code "military" at checkout.

{GIVEAWAY} In order to continue to raise awareness for Stop Soldier Suicide, Antonio and Real Men Real Style are giving away one tie to a lucky Semper Wifey reader. All you have to do is visit the website, then come back here and comment which tie is your favorite and who you would give it to. A winner will be selected at random on October 1.

Enjoying the now of summer...

2013-09-18T21:54:00.002-05:00

Remember my post last week about putting my pumpkin decorations out in the summer? Well, I took my own advice and spent a morning at the beach. I still have my pumpkins out at home, and my house still smells, like "leaves," but I rejoiced in the present season by wearing a short dress, taking my shoes off, and wading in the ocean. (And I might have sipped a pomegranate mimosa.) Summer at its finest. :)

New affiliate and fundraiser program for the Semper Wifey Shop...

2013-09-18T00:26:00.000-05:00

I'm so excited to announce that the Semper Wifey Shop has a new affiliate program! This is a great (and super easy) way to make money for yourself or for your organization. Please read the flyer below and email me (semperwifey75(at)gmail.com) to sign up and start making a little moula!

Put away the pumpkins...

2013-09-12T21:49:00.000-05:00

I have a confession to make. All of my pumpkin decorations are out, my house smells like autumn, and I just bought some pumpkin spice coffee. And if I'm being really honest, my house has looked and smelled like fall since September 1. OK, August 30.

As I spent most of the day yesterday trying to stay cool in the 95 degree weather, I thought that maybe, just maybe, I was a little crazy for trying to channel fall in the heat of summer. But don't I do that for every season? As soon as it's actually fall, I'm planning for winter and Christmas. By January, I am praying that that silly little groundhog doesn't see his shadow. Then goodness knows I'm ready for the carefree attitude of summer right after that.

Why do I always look forward to the next season? What am I missing in my current season while I'm planning for the next? If I always look ahead, I'll never see what's right around me.

If I'm always looking forward to the end of deployment, I might miss the precious memories I'm making with my sons. If I'm always looking forward to when Boy2 is more independent, I might miss him sleeping in my arms after his bottle. If I'm always looking forward to our next move, I might miss the peace that comes with being settled in one place for a while.

Maybe I should put away my pumpkins until the appropriate time (like when it's actually fall) and go enjoy a day at the beach (since it is actually summer)!

Superhero no more...

2013-09-06T23:55:00.000-05:00

We've all seen the military wife propaganda that circulates. Military wives are fierce. They are strong. They are independent. They can do anything. They are superheroes.

I'm sure you've also heard the legends of fearless military wives. The military wife that found out her husband was killed in action and invited his buddies over to watch football that same day because she was worried about them. The military wife that never complained when her husband unexpectedly deployed the day after their wedding or their first child was born.

While these trite sayings and quaint stories are enough to make any military wife feel empowered, how far is too far with these facades and legends? When does the feeling of empowerment by the circulation of these stories and ideals get overshadowed by feelings of inadequacy? I think it happens very quickly.

Military wives are a unique bunch of women.  They are called to go above and beyond the call of duty of any civilian wife. But when we're constantly told, and expected, to be strong all the time, it's not long before our strength will inevitably fail. I'm proud of myself for dealing with, and most of the time embracing and enjoying, the military lifestyle. But I cry. I get frustrated. I get tired of doing life alone. And I feel guilty because I'm not always living up to the prescribed standard for military wives.

From talking to other military wives about their personal struggles and from reading other military wives' blogs, it seems that the reality of military wives is indeed one of strength. But it's also one of vulnerability.  The real stories of military wives are that they lock themselves in the bathroom to have a good cry because their toddlers are too much that day and Dad won't be home for months to help ease the burden. They go to weddings, parties, holidays, and family reunions by themselves because their husbands aren't home. They sleep with their phones in hopes of getting a phone call from their husbands in the middle of the night. Or they sleep with their phones so they can check their email several times a night in anticipation of an email from their husbands. They check all the doors and windows at night, set the alarm, and make sure their car keys are beside their bed in case something happens. Their emotions are a wreck and will be unleashed on an unsuspecting person. The slightest mishap can make a military wife throw her hands up in surrender simply because she has to handle another thing alone.

These are the real stories of military wives. The legends are just that. They are not real. And the legends and cute catch phrases associated with military wives should never be used as a tool against military wives to shame them into behaving a certain way, specifically as an immortal, solely independent, and happy woman who has her act together all the time. It's just not right to place those unrealistic expectations on anyone.

Military wives: take off your superhero cape and rip it up! Be real. Be honest.  You're not strong all the time. Let other military wives know it's ok to take off their superhero capes, too. We are hurting ourselves, our families, and those around us that genuinely want to help us when we wear the military wife superhero cape. Just like other superheroes, military wife superheroes are legends, fairy tales, and folklore. Superheroes do not exist.

Instead of finding fading strength in "being a military wife," find your strength in the Lord. "The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song." -Psalm 28:7

The cheapest designer handbag ever...

2013-09-05T22:44:00.000-05:00

The cheapest designer handbag ever is now available in the Semper Wifey Shop! Just imagine giving your next gift in this adorable gift bag! Or heck, sport it like a real designer bag! When will you ever find a Chanel bag for $5?

Baby (fighter pilot)...

2013-09-03T22:00:00.000-05:00

If you do it for one child, you have to do it for the rest...

3rd Annual Marine Birthday Bash...

2013-08-25T16:32:00.000-05:00

It's time to start preparing for the 3rd Annual Marine Birthday Bash! It will be hosted right here at Semper Wifey from November 6-10!!!

This year's format will be a photo link-up. Each day will have a different word to be used as the inspiration for your photo. All you have to do is link up your photo for the day. Interpretation of the day's photo theme is completely us to you! All photo entries will be entered into a drawing for that day's prize. One random winner will be selected.

To link up your pictures, simply comment with your blog post address OR post it on Facebook using #semperwifey.

November 6: Faithful
November 7: Courage
November 8: Hero
November 9: Blue
November 10: Commitment

The Birthday Bash is open to everyone...not just Marine families!

If you would like to donate a prize for the Birthday Bash, please contact me! In exchange for providing a product, Semper Wifey will give you 3 months of free advertising on Semper Wifey and mentions in Facebook recognition. This is a fantastic opportunity to advertise your product. Or if you just want to provide a prize for the giveaway, it's also a great way to showcase your blog!

In the meantime, let's get this party started RIGHT NOW! I am giving away a set of note cards from the Semper Wifey Shop! All you have to do is grab a Birthday Bash button, put it in your blog's sidebar, then leave a comment letting me know it's there (please leave your website and email when commenting). This giveaway ends October 10.

Military homecoming dress style {Semper Stylish}...

2013-08-23T15:47:00.000-05:00

What's your military homecoming dress style?

Military Homecoming: Sexy Cocktail by semperwifey featuring black patent sandals

Military Homecoming: Vintage Bombshell by semperwifey featuring high heel pumps

Military Homecoming: Sunday Best by semperwifey featuring heart stud earrings

Signs of deployment...

2013-08-14T19:46:00.000-05:00

"Please don't go, Dada." :(

What does imminent deployment look like around your house?

If you like it, please share it! :)