Sexy on the Darkside

How Slutty Are You?

2012-03-01T23:53:00.000-08:00

I was surfing a site I usually go to and there was a thread happening. The topic was simply called

Now me being the curious gal that I am, figured what the heck, let's see how slutty I am! Turns out I am as slutty as I like to be lol! A rousing 86%!! Yep I'm actually proud of that and at my age too boot!

Here's the test, go ahead, take it.... push yourself to the edge, I bet you will be glad you did!

http://www.okcupid.com/the-slut-test

Enjoy!

Live, Laugh & Love

Sierra

Hitachi Time

2012-03-01T12:15:00.002-08:00

Recently Master and I had some play time together. We both were craving to be together, and given our time is precious these days, we take time whenever we can get it!!

The other night, I was horny and asked Master if He would have sex with me. In an instant I was attacked! Master has this very sexy growl that drives me insane and I get really wet from hearing his voice. The other thing He does is he bites me usually around my neck area! Its very primal and HOT, often it reminds me of what we would be like if we were wild animals in the wilderness; except no lion clothes here!

Master starts playing with my clit and pussy, and I am all wiggly and such *giggles*. Master always likes to get me to cum before He even enters me, but I wasn't in the full space for that, so he teases me some more. He flips me over and starts giving me a barehanded spanking! Combined with biting my neck, growling and now spanking me, I and starting to get lost in my little world. Floating happily to hearing His growls, like the wolf he is!

He flips me forcibly and He decides He is going to go for some more intense pussy play and I am a lucky girl!! While He is enjoying my pussy, I grab my Hitachi. For those that don't have a Hitachi Wand, this little baby is the gem of all gems. Here is a good description of it from another blogger Hitachi.

Master orders me to use my Hitachi and upon doing so He enters my pussy. Instant rush! The feeling of a warm ass, the high of the Hitachi vibing my clit and now Master inside me! I want to cum and Master growls at me, a long lingering growl into my ear and I cum very very loudly, not once but multiple times!

I bring Master to orgasm and He is a very happy man!

I love my Master and our connection is strong as is our love!

Live, Laugh and Love,

Sierra

Answering Your Requests and Emails!

2012-02-24T10:48:00.000-08:00

I've had emails and comments about my poly relationship and what's happening with it. Thank you for asking, and for letting me know what you are interested in!

There hasn't been too much going on with my Sir for a few weeks now. This is the downside to having someone being "just a play partner" in common language it is someone you play with casually. Sir has a Primary relationship as well as a Secondary relationship and a very casual relationship with a play partner he seems once in a while. This can make my play time with Sir very challenging and although we both know that we really enjoy our time together, it is I that is looking at what is going on in my life, and the ups and downs that happen in one's life. I see at times a very lucky girl to have a loving Master who works very hard every day to provide for us and I see a Sir, who I do enjoy playing with, but the time apart seems to grow more each time.

Sometimes, especially when Master is very busy with work and comes home exhausted that after I tend to drawing his bath or giving him a much deserved and earned massage, that leaves little for any playing on the dark side.

I miss Master and Sir right now. It isn't easy when life gets in the way, but given that each represent a piece of the lifestyle I enjoy, I know that with patience and time things always find a way to work out.

Thank you to my readers and comments left on what you like about my blog and what you want to see more of. Without you, I wouldn't know which direction to write about :)

For my Fetish Model fans, discussions are in the works to start gearing up for new photographs, so keep your eyes out for new shots in the near and not so distant future!

Live, Love and Laugh,

Sierra xx

Kitty wants a drink

2012-02-20T17:46:00.000-08:00

I decided to try out uploading to YouTube today. Its been something I've wanted to do for a while (oh hey I can mark that off my Bucket List Bucket List 2012! ) it was just more about finding the courage to learn and then do something fun.

So my little tester is my kitten Cinder Kitty Wants a Drink. He has this passion and freak out over water! Doesn't matter if it is in a glass or in the tub or sink, if he can get to it, you can be sure he will. The other is chasing toilet paper and watching the toilet water flush, but that's a whole nother episode LOL!

Please share my link, post your comments, check out the ads, I'd like to get as much feedback as possible, so I can tweak and improve upcoming videos!

Have a great day!

Sierra

Cinder checking out where the mice are! LOL

The Ups and Downs of being a Play Partner

2012-02-18T20:59:00.000-08:00

I am starting to think that I don't like the beginning NRE (New Relationship Energy), the butterflies, the laughter, the incessant flirting and bantering. The phase can go for days and days. Then, without any warning, the natural occurrence of the next phase enters.

I knew when I started playing with Sir, that as much as He is interested in playing with me, He also said He didn't know how often it would be. At first it seemed back to back (it was actually about 2 to 4 weeks in between our visits). I enjoyed our visits, our energy, the connection and for me exploration to areas not touched before.

As time has started to move on and its been about 3 to 4 weeks since I last saw Sir, I have really started to think about what I want. I've come to realize I do want a regular play partner, but I don't know how regular this relationship would be.

My Master is my rock, I talk to Him about everything and when I feel unsure or uncertain, He supports me and reminds me that He isn't going anywhere and of how much He loves me. I know that through Him and His love and unconditional support, I continue to grow and flourish within my submission to Him who I call Master.

I'm not sure if this is just a reality check for me, and if so, then I may accept the situation and find another play partner who will give me more of what I am looking for; or Sir will stay in the picture but I recognize that we won't be playing very much. If that is the case, our time together may just fade away.

The ups and downs of being a play partner - sometimes when it works, it works great; but when it is difficult, it can be very challenging.

Passion and Poison

2012-02-17T18:11:00.000-08:00

My blog is not usually used as a venting ground. I prefer to do that somewhere else. However, having said that, the last couple of days I have been brewing over something and even after I have spoken to friends to get their feed back and checking on my sources to get more information, unfortunately my passion for protecting animals and especially our own pets, has caused me to become very determined to find an end resolution to the situation I have been made aware of.

It seems a very few short days ago, my neighbor and I were speaking, she wanted to let me know that she had noticed a couple of dead squirrels in our complex, now it should be noted that we do not have an abundance of squirrels in the rural area I live in. My neighbor went on further to comment that she had spoken to our Property Manager and he confirmed that poison had been put out by a neighbor, but that he wouldn't reveal who that was!

When I heard this, I became very upset! I started to have thoughts of "what if's" and not long after my anxiety started to creep up. I stopped myself and reminded myself that Blaze (my beautiful JRT) is home, he's safe and wagging his tail happily in front of me :D. However, the next day, I am skeptical about walking him in and around our part of the neighborhood as I don't know who it is that put it out, and I also don't know what to look for!

I did look in my Community Rules and there is nothing in there about poisoning rodents, I called my local Animal Shelter and they said there was nothing they could do. So, after doing a more thorough check and I came across this note from the BC SPCA Predator Control (i.e. Pest Control). I feel like I have finally stumbled on something viable and content worthy.

With this, I will leave my blog to be updated when I know more in the coming days!

Remember to love your pet as much as they love you!

Ok back to my regular pervy posts!

Valentines Day!!

2012-02-14T18:05:00.000-08:00

Yes, it is THAT day where a cupid is apparently shooting arrows to those needing direction!

Today I woke up to my Master saying those words to me, and followed with a hug and a kiss. Something so simple, yet so meaningful!

After not having someone in my life to share any day with, let alone this day, or worse yet, having someone who could care less about this day or any other day.

So I did some research online to see what others do on this red filled heart day! This is what I found out: http://www.timeanddate.com/holidays/canada/valentine-day

"Many people send letters, cards, presents and gifts to the person with whom they have or want to have a romantic relationship. Valentine's Day cards are often red or pink and decorated with images of hearts, red roses, teddy bears, presents or happy couples kissing or embracing. They may be in brightly colored, perhaps pink or red, envelopes.

Many people give gifts to loved ones on Valentine's Day. Common gifts are:

Flowers, particularly red roses.
Chocolates and/or candy.
Teddy bears.
Toy hearts.
Sparkling wine.
Cosmetics.
Clothing, including lingerie.
Jewelry.

Some people celebrate Valentine's Day lavishly. They may treat their partner to a themed meal in a restaurant or a night in a luxury hotel. Others may take short breaks or vacations on Valentine’s Day.

Valentine's Day can also be an occasion for a more general celebration of love and appreciation of people who are personally important to an individual. School children may help decorate their classrooms with hearts and spring birds and make cards or presents for their parents. Stores may also sell Valentine's Day themed cakes, cookies or candy. Teenagers and young adults may hold Valentine's Day parties or dances on or near February 14."

I'm curious though, if you are spiritual in nature, how do you embrace Valentine's Day?

I found this article and an excerpt from it, that really resonated with me, and something I know not enough of us do... and that is courtesy of the Huffington Post Meditation Center

"The focus for Valentine's Day is a unique twist on the what the day has come to mean: before showering your love and affection on someone else (which is a decidedly cool thing to do every day!), how about starting with a simple focus on loving yourself first?

It has been said that we should give from our overflow and Donna's meditation today begins with the premise that the more loving we have inside, the more we have to share with others."

I also want my single followers to know, that I am being mindful of yourselves, and I know the saying "Single Awareness Day" feels more announced today than on any other day. Other than society creating a huge hoopla with celebratory gifts and tokens to loved ones, the thing I want you all to know is this

In my eyes, you are ALL my Valentine!!

Bucket List

2012-02-11T21:14:00.000-08:00

Writing a bucket list is important to me, as it will help keep me focused on what I want to accomplish before I die. I will keep adding to it as I think of more items. If you think of something you would like me to add to my list, please email me at sultrysensualsierra@gmail.com.

I will blog about what I have crossed off and from time to time include pictures and talk about what the experience was like. My goal with writing out a bucket list is to encourage me to always live life to the fullest and to be mindful of the present.

Fly in a hot air balloon
Do a tour in a Helicopter
Visit Mount Baker (Never been)
Para-sailing in a warm climate
Fly First Class Round Trip
Vacation in Jamaica
Volunteer work with animal shelters
Volunteer work with battered women
Volunteer work with homeless shelters
Help someone anonymously
Send a message in a bottle
Go to England to see family
Work on my weight loss and get back to my karate weight
Work on improving my strength training
Work on my cardiovascular
Add exercises every day or other day til I am at 30 to 45 mins.
~~Take Blaze (my dog) to Tynehead Park and walk an hour at least once a week~~
Get a dog preferably from a rescue or animal shelter
Visit Jasmine and Destiny with Blaze
Have a salt water tank again
Have my blood taken to make sure my cholesterol is below warning
Donate Blood
Stop biting my nails
Get gel nails again
Get my hair cut and styled
Do Pin Up Modelling
Do More Fetish Modelling
Do More Photography with Patrick Parenteau
Write my Will
~~Learn how to use YouTube~~
Learn how to make money online with PTC (Point to Click)
Have my ashes released in my favorite park and in the ocean
Finish renovations started in my kitchen
Start renovations in my bathroom
Expand my vegetable garden
Go to Scotland
Get another tattoo - this one representing my pets (Rizzo, Blaze, Teo, Jingles paw prints)
Visit Italy
Try surfing in California or Hawaii
Go back to Hawaii
Go Whale Watching in Vancouver
Return to fishing - Salmon or Trout
Sleep overnight on a boat, and see the florescent ling cod (loved it the first time)
Vacation in Vegas (I've never been)
Go to Victoria and visit the Empress Hotel and have High Tea
Get a full body massage followed up by a soak in a mud bath
Return to Acupuncture and Reiki treatments
~~Enjoy a Hot Stone Massage~~ (keep it up for health benefits)
Enjoy regular massages (helps cleanse my body of toxins)
Cleanse my home of negative energy
Do a Yeast and Intestinal Cleanse twice a year
Continue on my spiritual journey
Continue with my working on my inner self
Start and Finish the program called Dialectical Behavioral Therapy DBT
When ready - stop taking HRT
When ready - stop taking Beta Blocker
When ready - reduce Effexor XR
Take a ride on a real train (no, not the skytrain!)
Visit Alcatraz in San Francisco
Ride a trolley car in San Francisco
Ride a gondola (maybe in Switzerland or Banff)
~~Have a Long Term Savings account~~
Visit a Winery in California
Ride a horse on a beach at sunset
Sit on a beach watching the sunrise/sunset
Swim naked in Jamaica, Hawaii or Barbados
Have sex under a waterfall
Make love in the rain (been a long time)
Dance in the Rain
Go to a Swingers Resort
Stay at an all inclusive Resort
See a show at the River Rock Hotel and Casino
See a show at the Red Robinson Theatre
See a Broadway Play on Broadway
Walk through Central Park in New York
Go to see the Phantom of the Opera
Write an erotic story
Create a following on my blog
Have a contest on my blog Sexy on the Darkside
~~Create an income from online sites~~
Get to know my nephews
Visit an authentic haunted house
Drive down the Oregon Coast
Ride in a Horse drawn Carriage in the winter
Stay in a cabin in the winter
Go snow shoeing
Sit in a hot tub in the winter
Have a real Christmas Tree in my home
Vacation in Disney World in Florida
Vacation in Miami
Swim with dolphins
Ride an Elephant
Touch a Giraffe and feed them
Go on an African Safari
Visit Okinawa, Japan
Have sushi in Okinawa, Japan
Go to the 9/11 site in New York, USA
Learn Bellydancing and make my own costume
Have a romantic picnic in the park
Watch the stars and name the constellations
Make a wish on a shooting star
~~See the Northern Lights~~
Watch a movie outdoors on a big screen
Go to a Drive In Movie (haven't since I was a young girl)
Play spin the bottle (haven't since I was a young girl)
Play truth or dare (haven't since I was a young girl)
Learn to fire a gun
Go back to Karate and get my black belt
Take a kickboxing class
Visit my close friend in Hines Creek, Alberta
Visit the boys I had in Kinship care
Go and see Bruce Lee's grave and send positive thoughts and energy
Go and see Brandon Lee's grave and send positive thoughts and energy
Learn to make soap from scratch
Learn to make candles from bees wax
Learn to make a scrapbook
Learn to take photographs of high quality
Learn a new language other than English and Spanish
Go see a Dinner Theatre
Write a book
Pay off my Student Loan
~~Ride a mechanical bull~~

100 Things About Me

2012-02-09T21:16:00.000-08:00

1. I am the eldest child and have one sister.
2. I'm a Capricorn
3. My birthday is 2 days before Christmas
4. I am an animal lover
5. I have 1 dog a Jack Russell Terrier - named Blaze
6. I have 3 cats - Jingles, Cinder and Ella
7. I had a Border Collie - named Rizzo, who passed away Dec. 14/11 at 11 1/2.
8. I have red hair
9. I am an amateur model
10.I have hazel eyes
11. I am curvy
12. I love Pin Up Modelling
13. I have freckles
14. I attained my brown belt in martial arts in 2005
15. I moved to Alberta for 7 years and came back in 2008
16. I settled my multiple car accidents in 2010 after 7 years of court matters.
17. I am bisexual
18. I am a submissive to a loving Dominant.
19. I am poly-amorous
20. I recently started a play partner relationship
21. I love impact scenes
22. I love fire and knife play
23. I am exploring deep humiliation scenes
24. I love to wear corsets, mini skirts, gloves, thigh highs with the seam up the back, and high heels
25. I own my own home
26. I own my own car a 2010 Chevy Aveo
27. I am very intuitive and have spirits who visit me
28. I am spiritual
29. I read my horoscope
30. I love everything to do with astrology
31. I have seen the Northern Lights
32. I have watched many shooting stars and made a wish on every one of them
33. I have one tattoo in the middle of my back called "Yin and Yang Dragons"
34. I am a Swinger
35. I am a Kinkster
36. Carnations are my favorite flower
37. My grandparents mean everything to me
38. I am an aunt to two little boys
39. I love the Sunshine
40. I love the Spring time
41. I love to garden
42. I love to go to the park
43. I love going to nude beaches
44. I smile and think of a special person when I see a butterfly
45. I believe that dragon flies represent new life
46. I love the Young and Restless and have been watching it since I was a young girl
47. I love General Hospital and have been watching it since the Luke and Laura story line
48. I love sparring and kickboxing and miss it.
49. I post on Fetlife
50. I am a Twitter -a-holic
51. I am a blogger and have been for over a year
52. I love to watch Wimbeldon
53. Andre Agassi is one of my favorite tennis players
54. I have a background in law
55. I am shy
56. I like meeting people
57. I like red wine, merlot is my preference (either Chilean or South African wines)
58. I love candles
59. I was born in Vancouver, BC Canada
60. I grew up here
61. My parents come from England
61. I am rooted in my English ancestry
62. I have been married
63. I am divorced
64. I have been to Hawaii 3 times, California, Boston, New York, England, Mexico and Texas
65. I left home at 19
66. I am an child abuse survivor
67. I have had 2 miscarriages
68. I had my first job at 14
69. I believe in life after death
70. I have had 3 and 4 somes
71. I am estranged from my family
72. I have 1 girlfriend who has been in my life for over 20 years
73. I have 1 other girlfriend who has been a solid force with me for 4 years
74. I am working on being my authentic self
75. I love incense
76. I do get emotionally involved in my relationships
77. I have several piercings namely - 2 earring holes on each ear, my belly and my clitoris
78. I love Reiki and always fall into a calm space when having a massage
79. I love aromatherapy as I find it peaceful
80. My favorite sex toy is my Hitachi
81. My tag name is Lovetobespanked
82. I love to be bound and cuffed, I am immediately calm
83. I go to Subbie Tea Socials once a month
84. I belong to a forum called Gracious Host as a way to meet other kinksters
85. My favorite colors are red and black
86. I love to shop at Thrift Stores
87. I love the series True Blood
88. I love the series Spartacus
89. My favorite holiday is Halloween
90. I love houses decorated in Christmas Lights
91. I love the smell of pine needles
92. I love bubble baths with epsom salts
93. I am very feminine and love to have my nails done and toes as well
94. I love to have my hair done at the hair salon with my friend Robin
95. I won't take the skytrain
96. I have my drivers license
97. I believe in ghosts
98. I believe that karma does happen when you least expect it
99. I also believe that things happen for a reason
100. I am a trustworthy and loyal friend

Icy Hot Pussy and Clothes Pegs

2012-02-06T13:48:00.000-08:00

I've been introduced to the wonderful gel called Icy/Hot!

Recently during a scene, I was blind folded and bound, legs spread apart. There was a feeling of gel cold at first, then WHAM it became hot as it was swirled around my outer pussy lips. I could feel the flesh puff up, the sensations wild and cravings of the unknown, yet wanting to know what was going to happen next!

Clothes pegs are placed one...by...one on my pussy and tits. Oh how I love clothes pegs! BUT my tits are firm and the flesh around them is taut which makes it difficult to pinch the skin, but not one to disappoint, my nipples are the ones to get pegged.

Within a short period of time, the sensation of the Icy/Hot combined with the pegs pinching my pussy lips, the rush is building, the blood flow starting to be cut off from the pegged parts, the feeling of knowing they were there, was dissipating. Sensory Deprivation is a huge fetish of mine and being blindfolded I started to ride the waves of endorphin having me in and out of the present. I was ordered to suck His cock while everything was happening. My servitude at this point is solely on His needs.

I'm ordered to rub off and cum. I hear His words through everything happening and the sensations being felt. I was riding the waves and loving every minute of it. I had never experienced anything like this before and I didn't want it to end!! But I know like all good things, they DO end!

I felt the pull of the pegs....1....2 and instantly I cried out! He tells me to focus on what I am doing, sucking his cock. Like a good girl, I do as I am told. The humiliation scene continues.... 3....4 I am now wincing in the shock of feeling the pegs being removed, wanting to pull away and say "no more"! He would have no part of that! My mascara is running down my face, snot now bubbling out of my nose. No longer the put together girl that had arrived a while ago. He was soothing me with his pleasure of seeing me this way and I could barely hear through my own sounds.

Ultimately though, the pleasure is NOT mine, it is what He wants but the cuddles after and soothing words made it all worth it.

Inspection and Punishment

2012-02-04T13:17:00.000-08:00

The dynamics of our relationship are continually learning and evolving. Being poly doesn't mean that I can forget the expectations placed upon me. Given that I have memory problems, this does make it challenging, so does not living our lifestyle 24/7. Structure is vital to me and this will be something that we will work on.

I received an email from Master yesterday that He was displeased with me.

Ouch, was my first thought, as I couldn't fathom what I could have done that would have Him upset with my service.

Turns out that what I had done was upon returning home from my overnight play date with Sir, I had not presented our play cuff and collar to Master. Master says that it is very important that when I return home to Him, that I present myself to Him as I am returning my submission to Him.

I had been given the day to talk it out with those that I wished, to be whatever emotion I needed to be, but that at 6pm I was being forced to present myself to Him! Instantly I was upset, well angry was more like it. To make a long story short, when I returned home from my overnight play date, Master had left me with my Aftercare kit and word that I was to relax and take it easy. Yet, I was focused on wanting to make sure His needs would be met when He got home from work. To me this is making sure dinner was ready, our pets were fed, the house was tidy. I did not think about gathering the cuffs and collar for presentation.

Master called when He was on His way home, I gathered the cuffs and collar and got myself ready for inspection. I then waited for the sound of Master's vehicle. I was with anticipation, "would He approve, would He ignore me until He decided to greet me?" Suddenly the full perimeters were coming into view. The front door handle turns and I am kneeled with the cuffs laid out for presentation. Master walks in and acknowledges our pets who are anxious to be greeted. I stayed right where I was, no movement, no asking, just waited.

After a few minutes, Master asks for each cuff one by one He places them on each wrist and the collar around my neck. He raises me to my feet and we shared our first words.

I was asked to go and draw Him a bath and did so eagerly. I placed some soothing bubble bath into the tub. I quickly went and got a lighter to light the candle placing it near the tub and I then waited for Master. I undressed Him and was ordered to stay while He bathed. I was asked to bathe Him and did so, listening to His words as He spoke. Taking in all that we talked about, gathering a better understanding of His expectations of me as His submissive. When He was ready, I dried Him off

Master wanted to go to dinner, and decided on sushi. Yet before we were going, He told me that after we got home He was going to fuck me. I sighed, to which He saw this as me being sassy and promptly put me over His knees bare handed spanking as He reminded me of my place. Master then asked if I wanted to be fucked and I said yes. Thinking I was going to be, I was surprised when I was ordered to lube up a penis dildo and forced to fuck it and suck Him off. I did as I was told, the feelings of humiliation coming over me and when that wasn't enough, he bent me over and fucked me HARD.

I know my Master will always have my best interests at heart, even when I need a reminder.

Subbie Tea

2012-01-30T12:59:00.000-08:00

Recently I got the chance to do something I have always wanted to do in our Community. I went and attended a Subbie Tea!! First off, my thanks to our hostess yesterday, she truly outdid herself with her hospitality and baking!

It was really great to be able to sit with my "sisters" in our community and listen to various discussions that came up during our get together. Things such as "What is the best way for a submissive to apologize if she is truly remorseful for her behavior", "What are your hard limits" and other various insightful topics.

The great thing about attending this subbie tea, is that the hostess visual is to share not just with ourselves but with others, the values and enjoyment the BDSM Community is truly about in the 30+ years she has been in it.

What does being in the BDSM Community mean to you?

I know my place

2012-01-15T19:53:00.000-08:00

The energy of the room encapsulating us, the candles, toys, mood and moment had finally come to be! He grabbed His belt, I get very turned on when I see belts! He lifted me up with the belt around my neck, bringing me in for a kiss. The power exchange became intense and suddenly all became aware to me!

Our evening had begun! We played well into the night and eventually drifted off to sleep.

I'm looking to do some new pictures. Yep its that time of year again, time to bring out the toys, fetishes, and fun!! Let's make the magic happen!

Laugh, Live and Licks,

Sierra

Our Date

2012-01-12T09:02:00.000-08:00

The day had finally arrived, my first real poly date with Master home! I have been feeling a lot of nerves and Master had commented that my bratty side had been very prevalent and that I had been very sharp tongued. He took this to mean that I needed to sort through my feelings and just do whatever it was that I needed to do to get ready. Combined with all of that I still was having a lot of uncertainty that I was really going to not have any drama from either "A" or Master.

I did NOT want to give any power to our past experiences with those that claim to be A) poly and B) Dominant. However, I don't want to focus on that, life is about moving forward and that is the direction I am going.

I wanted to wear something sexy, I was going through all my clothing, and as you can imagine, NOTHING looked good lol. Isn't that how it always is when you want to dress to impress? I take a lot of pride in how I present myself not just my Master, but for those I am going to be in the company of. I finally settled on a black mini skirt, thigh high nylons and a black dress top, everything met with Master's approval, he was very pleased with His girl's presentation!!

I left after a few tears of fear and apprehension, not because I didn't want to see "A", but because I have had such negative experiences with my poly dates, that I didn't want to lose my Master as a result of going to play and coming home to something that would reveal itself to be something unhappy. Master assured me several times, that He meant what He said, and said what He means. This is so very important to me and knowing that "A" feels the same as Master, has made this journey even more accepting.

We meet up at our agreed location and we have a bite to eat. Upon greeting me with a hug, "A" whispered in my ear that He was very happy to see me. This made me smile and start to feel more at ease. We didn't stay too long after we finished our meal, I knew that "A" had prepared our room and I had no idea what was about to be before me.

When we got our room, "A" had candles all around, one by one, He lit them setting a ambiance and calmness within the room. He had a variety toys that were laid strategically throughout. Boy oh boy was there a variety of thoughts going through my head!! Yet, not once did He order me to strip and place a collar on me and quip that I was now His bitch for the night.

Music started to play off a really cool looking Ipod dock, the system was clear and crisp, I could tell He was pretty stoked about how well it sounded :). I went to freshen up, and when I returned I remember coming out to the sounds of whip, I watched "A" practice. He wasn't demonstrating to prove anything to me. He was practicing because He has been wanting to explore using a whip and like any Dominant that I know who is true to Himself and to His skills, He will practice for as long as it takes, until a sense of completeness and confidence overrides any uncertainty. We spoke of people we know who are proficient with whipping. Not surprisingly we know the same people.

We continued to talk about what has been laid around the room, the flickers of the candles dancing on the walls. Then as things we moving along a belt appears and is suddenly around my neck......

You might have to say "Pretty Please" and I may just share some more with you!

Including Poly

2012-01-02T16:22:00.000-08:00

Well 2012 has now rung in and lots of things are happening behind the scenes! My journey with Fetish modelling will be broadening as I have started to reconnect with photographers who I have worked with. So be sure to stay tuned for new photographs! I'm so excited about that!

I'm still focused on my health and being in the best shape I can be in, this is always going to be a work in progress, but I know I am worth it, and my photographs will reflect that. I've been reviewing my profile on Fetlife as it is time to clean out peeps that I've not chatted with in at least six months, as well as cleaning up my fetishes. Fetishes are like dust, you can either not sweep or sweep! What's your view of cleaning out stuff? Do you keep stuff forever, or do you go through and get rid of things?

So the topic I chose today is about Including Poly. I've been poly for awhile, but it isn't easy to find someone who is truly poly. There are a lot of wannabe's, those are the one's who say they are poly and what not, but the minute as in my situation my Master came back from a trip out of town, the guys suddenly disappeared. This left a very bad taste in my mouth, so I have kept my heart close to my chest and my experiences known.

For me at times I have had more trouble than its worth in dating, even though Master and I are in an open relationship, He is my Primary and I always discuss possibilities with Him first.

So last week I met with a Dom I've been chatting with for a few months now. I was excited and Master was very supportive, He even told me what to wear and He wanted to inspect me before I went on my date. Let's call him "A". I drove to our agreed meeting spot. Not long after "A" shows up and the first thing I notice is how tall He is. He gives me a hug and we sit down to chat. He orders himself a drink as I had arrived before Him and ordered my own. The waitress also left us the menus. There was energy between us and I just listened to "A" talk and get a better feel of what He is like as person. It is very different when you only ever chat with someone on a computer or by text.

We laughed a lot, shared interests and the waitress came back several times to take our order, but we hadn't even looked at the menu! So we decided to make a decision on what to eat. I ordered the Chicken Taco salad, as I find myself mentally making better choices with my food intake. "A" I believe ordered a burger.

So we carried on chatting, had dinner, the energy had settled a little and I think that was because nerves had calmed a bit. He did go and have a smoke after dinner and I don't smoke anymore so I just hung out at the table while He went outside.

When "A" returned we leisurely finished our drinks, He paid up the bill and we were going to go to our respective cars. But before we left, I saw Him thinking and so I asked Him what was on His mind. He said that He was thinking about whether we were going to go and play or not. Although I was very flattered and happy He thought about that, I hadn't prepared myself to bring a change of clothes and I had my dog with me in the car. Combined with the fact, that I haven't fucked someone on the first meet in a long time. I used to, and sure sometimes it is really hot, but with D/s there are many things to go over before you get into fucking.

"A" offered to drive me to my car, which I happily accepted, although my car wasn't far, just up the road, the weather was pelting horribly. The wind and rain were going sideways! Trees were looking like the branches may collapse. I admit I'm not a fan of driving in the night, let alone with a windy, rainy night ahead of me, and lights glaring on the road, I knew it was not going to be a fun night home.

"A" gets me to my car safely and we chat a bit more and we lean into kiss. It was a soft kiss and a hug, with Him letting out a low growl in my ear, something I am weak in the knees to begin with. I sit back and smile and he puts his hand on my thigh. He says that he wanted to feel my skin, and he says that my skin is so soft.

I smiled again and said yes it is, always has been. I said, well I best go, the drive and all. I kiss Him again, and leave with a smile on my face. Like a gentleman, He watched me open my car door, let my dog out to go to the bathroom before I got in the car and warmed it up. "A" started off and I went my way home.

I texted Him like a good girl when I arrived home as I also let Master know I was home. "A" texted me a few naughty texts and then we called it a night.

We have decided to see one another, and in the meantime we are emailing regularly, talking about boundaries, fetishes, and getting to know one another more. Hrmph, maybe this poly experience may be something that I've been wanting for a while!

Can you help please? - Rizzo's Journey

2011-12-28T15:01:00.001-08:00

Today's blog is not my usual posting, but something that is very near and dear to me, please take a read below.

Rizzo never asked for much, my beloved Border Collie had to be put down December 14, 2011 after about 10 weeks of being diagnosed with a brain tumor. For those that have pets, it is like we become family when it comes to our pets and doing what is best for them.

A little about Rizzo

I met Rizzo when my ex-boyfriend and I were together. To meet Rizzo you would see him happily half run/half skip to meet you. He was always happy, wagging his tail and even if he wasn't he never showed you. He was always ready to play, always had a stick or squeaky toy ready to toss at you. He just loved people THAT much. He was also vocal, if you played tug of war with him, you were sure to get a rise out of him, where by he would sound like he was being hurt to the worst degree imaginable, then if you let the object go, he would frolic and run around all over the yard, he would come to you, toy in mouth and I could always say "are you going to give it to me Rizzie" and he would run right by sometimes and I always said "oooooh ok, maybe later lol"

One day, I went to the "farm" to see the dogs, as my ex's mom was very ill and in hospital. There were neighbors who would go over and drop bags of dog food on the ground and after a period of time not just these two would have food, but soon surrounding stray dogs, coyotes, the neighbor's dogs all would show up; Rizzo looked terrible, he had weeping eyes, he had an abscessed wound on his jowl, and very underweight. But the thing I couldn't get out my head was his fur, it was like he didn't have any. Well I decided enough was enough and I was taking him home, much to the dismay of my ex., he wanted to put him down. I said no, he is only 4 years old and has so much life to give!

From that day forward, I never looked back!

When I rescued Rizzo, this is what he looked like

When I made this choice, I took him to the vet right away. Rizzo was not in good shape, he had pneumonia, an abscessed jowl, underweight, and he was down to his last coat layer what is called "guard rail". It took many weeks of antibiotics, milk baths (medicine given by the vet), brushing his coat every day, he could only go down 3 stairs and out to go to the bathroom and then back inside. But through it all he NEVER gave up.

I learned that during this time, Rizzo had a thyroid problem, which did contribute to his coat issue. So we made sure to put him on the proper medication and in time he started to feel a lot better. However, given how much had gone through in a short period of time, it would take him up to a good year or more before his lungs would be stronger than they were at that time.

As life went on, and so did the years, Rizzo flourished. His coat returned to the full texture it was meant to be. His zest for life was even stronger than before, and he had the joys of other dogs as we had just had a litter of pups (this is where Blaze came in).

Fast forward to where we are now....

Even though Rizzo had a ligament problem with his back right leg, from a run he and I had done at a park one morning. He would push through it and at times I would have to call I always knew when he had had enough, because if I didn't watch him, he would keep going lol. Months turned into years, and my boy always was near me, never far. When he hurt, I hurt and vice versa. We were joined at the hip and I had been told that because he had been a rescue that he would always be fiercely loyal to me. Trust me, I couldn't have asked for a more loyal pet.

One morning in mid October 2011, I had noticed Rizzo showing a mild twitch with his head. It was one of those moments where you weren't sure if it truly happened or not. The other thing Riz would do, is whenever he was laying down he had this habit of what looked like "throwing his head" onto the floor. I remember saying one day to Riz "Hey bud, your going to hurt yourself one of these days."

After the twitches became more and more like seizures, I knew something was really wrong and took him in to my vet. Given that there were no outward symptoms, my vet opted to take some blood and see if there were any abnormalities. The results came in a few short days later and his blood work came up normal. So it was a case of watch and see. Thru it all, Riz's appetite never changed, that boy could eat!

One day, the tremors became very severe, and I said to my boyfriend something is seriously wrong and it was decided that I would video using my Blackberry what I was seeing. I then sent it to my vet, and it was decided to put Rizzo on anti-convulsant medication Phenobarbitol and Prednisone for swelling around his brain as he was showing stumbling problems. Things progressed very quickly from that one day in mid October to where I was in November. The doctor wasn't sure how long we had with Riz, it could have been 2 weeks to an unknown time frame.

At first Rizzo responded well to treatment, it was like he had a sense of life about him back. He was playful, he was joyful, and he was Rizzo. The stuffies were now being tossed at me, as were the tennis balls. He was back to enjoying his walks and runs at the park. I didn't know how long I had my boy back, but I was determined to enjoy every moment. What I found the hardest was not getting my hopes up, I didn't want to believe that he could still die, how could he? He was now playing and being all the things that Rizzo always had been!

I'm not sure how long this went on for ... maybe a couple of weeks, give or take a few. Then slowly but surely, the stumbling returned, as did accidents happen in the house. I could see my boy's dignity slipping, and I wasn't going to allow that to be taken from him. He didn't deserve that, no one does. I lifted him to and from my car, on days he couldn't or if he was sore in his hips, to lifting him up one stair after being outside. My boy was slipping right before me, and his anxiety and neediness for me increased. I was up with him many hours of the night, sometimes just to hold his paw to soothe his panting, as was my boyfriend. There were times it was frustrating and lack of sleep was catching up with us, but at the same time, after everything Rizzo had given me, how could I not return the same to him?

Then it happened..... the morning I had been dreading. Rizzo woke up but had no interest in eating or getting up. I knew this could very well be the end. On top of that he had been congested and I had been wiping his face and throat with a warm towel every day the last week or more. I was concerned about him getting pneumonia again, and I knew that with his health already compromised, he wouldn't do well with having that on top of everything else.

So after a discussion with my boyfriend and combined with a promise I made to myself and those around me, I took him in to the vet. Within a couple of hours of going in, having him assessed and prognosis given. I knew that even with antibiotics there was no guarantee that he would improve, in fact it was a given that he most likely wouldn't. He was already having significant walking issues, and when he fell face first, I knew it was the end.

So with a separate room prepared, and Blaze with me; I lifted Rizzo up onto the bed, I knew I had to do it, without any help because this was a moment between my boy and I. It was the road we started together and now coming to an end. For that brief moment of liver treats with his brother Blaze, Rizzo's eyes and ears perked up, that inner puppy inside of him came out, making me wonder if I was making the right choice. But I knew had to go with my gut and what I had already witnessed. I had thought about the upcoming Christmas and keeping him alive til that passed, but I knew that I would be selfish and doing that for me.

So, the preparations were made, and for a brief moment Rizzo felt the needle go in, and I could see his flicker of fear go across his face, I had to look past myself and to him, assure him he would be ok, and with that he was gone.....

Together Rizzo, Blaze and I had 7 amazing years together. Together, we overcame many obstacles and stood up for one another. To some he was just a dog, to me he was my son, my true family. I know Rizzo is in my heart and soul and I do miss him every day, yet I have to believe that for his sake and for his spirit, I did the right thing.

Birthday Spanks !

2011-12-25T18:11:00.000-08:00

First off I would like to thank Mija, you created a wonderful idea about Advent blogging and keeping up daily. This taught me that for me, life happened to get very stressful in ways no one can prepare for. It also taught me, that it isn't as easy to think of what to write everyday either lol. A new goal for me, not sure, just yet.

So on to the topic at hand..... I thought I would post about the birthday spanks I received for my birthday this past Friday.

Being that I have a birthday right smack dab in the Christmas Season, I am accustomed to not having anything celebratory... well that is... until some kinky friends were having a get together and the invitation was extended to myself. It should be noted that none of them knew it was my birthday that very day when the invitation was sent.

Birthday Spanks Received

I had a very warm bum and yesterday I had lovely purple marks to remind me of my special day. Special friends for a special day. There was also a surprise birthday song sung to me! I was very surprised and yes, shy when everyone started to sing Happy Birthday to me lol. Just something I am not used to.

Time to Blow Out the Candles!!

Apparently I left 4 standing lol

May the Christmas spirit be with you and yours now and always!

Laugh, Live and & Love

Sierra

Bloggerversary!

2011-12-23T00:35:00.000-08:00

Hard to believe that not only is today my Birthday and Christmas Eve is tomorrow, then the day that many have been waiting for, Christmas!!

I see by my counter to the left of my blog, it will be my one year anniversary since I started blogging. I've found that blogging has been helping me to get my thoughts out and explore my Fetish and Kink sides openly. There will always be people that either like you or don't. What matters is that you are true to yourself.

I have fallen behind with my #Advent blogging :(, something I am not happy about, but I believe with all that has happened in the last couple of weeks, and then this week hasn't been any better. I am just about ready to hop into a hole, like a ground hog does, and check on February 2 to see if I have a shadow!

So tell me, are you guys all ready for Santa to arrive, maybe He will have that new flogger you asked for, or belt for that special slave or submissive. Either way from myself and my family, we wish to wish all of you a very Kinky Christmas and Fetish New Year!

I saw this and just HAD to share it with You all!

Holidays and D/s long distance

2011-12-16T21:22:00.000-08:00

It has been one heck of a heavy week emotionally. At the moment I believe this is a combination of a few days of my #Advent blogging. It has suddenly become a very challenging time to remember to blog on top of the loss of my beloved pet on Wednesday. My dog has been an intricate part of my life the last 7 years, he was 11 when I released him to Rainbow Bridge. Master has been wonderful with checking in on me via Skype, but we both miss being together, especially right now.

Master has a way of making everything feel so much better and right now, I have good days and bad days, but I miss our physical connection. Our D/s relationship is good, except today I didn't get my treadmill in, but I did go and do a lot of errands, that included a fair bit of walking. I'm also keeping a weight loss tracker going as I am working on losing some weight as my doctor is concerned about my cholesterol. I've already lost 2.5 pounds and this pleases me, and its a start but its in the right direction.

I'm feeling rather down tonight as I write my blog. I've been challenged with selling items on either Craigslist, Facebook and/or groups. Off and on it has gone well, but right now, when I could certainly use the financial gain, it feels like if it isn't one thing, its another.

On the D/s front I feel connected to Master, and I do report to him how and what I am doing. He has told me to take the time I need to do what I need to do with regards to grieving Rizzo. Tonight I have done a lot of chores on top of the chores I did that involved driving to various places.

As for the holidays, I will be on my own. Its not something I talk too much about as it makes me feel like people will feel sorry for me. My other dog Blaze plus our kittens will celebrate it together :).

Charlie Brown and Snoopy - nuf said

This is Rizzo and Blaze last winter 2010, I love how

Rizzo's coat billowed out like a puffy pillow *grins*

Master's girl

2011-12-12T22:46:00.000-08:00

As you can see I have been playing with my blog site. I thought it would be fun to incorporate some Christmas colors and a great picture of Santa giving to naughty elves a spanking *grins* to my blog so that it would be fitting with the advent daily blogging I have been doing. Today is day Days 11 and 12 of my #Advent blogging. I must admit today has been a bit of an upset, its always tough when Master has to go out of town.

The good thing is we worked out a few things He wants me to do while He is gone. I am going to do a daily journal for Him, Master wants to make sure I am eating properly. I have a tendency either not eat, or eat something quick that isn't healthy and with my recent blood tests back, I have to reduce my cholesterol. See when I had some surgery back in the Spring, it threw my body way out of whack and now that some things have changed and such, Master is going to help me with better eating and exercising. I have my routine chores to do in the morning, and I am to incorporate my exercising into it. I prefer the morning anyways, not so much for getting things out of the way, but that I am more productive in the morning.

I have a friend on Fetlife who has been working on her own cholesterol matters and has been a wealth of insight and knowledge.

Master and I have a great relationship, but when it comes to me and being kept in line, I find that it really helps to know that He is still overseeing my eating and exercising. It makes me feel closer to Him. We talk on Skype through the day and it does help, but I sure do miss Him at night, we often cuddle before bed, and I miss His smell and touch, which always makes me feel safe and loved.

I like being a good girl for my Master, I also know that sometimes I am disobedient and do crave punishment. Whether it be His look He gives me, to how He talks to me or the barehanded spanking I've received before, it is good to be put in my place as I feel even closer to Him.

Well I don't have much else to share tonight, so I am going to keep this short.

May your evening be full of Holiday magic and dancing elves,

Laugh, Love and Live,

Sierra

Words to live by

2011-12-10T13:01:00.001-08:00

YAY! Today I am actually writing Day 10 of my #advent blogging. I must admit I'm down today, Master is preparing for his trip out of town for a month over the upcoming holiday season. There is no way around it and the so I accept the path before me, regardless if I like it or not.

The following words I did not write, I saw them on Tumblr today courtesy of A Master's Journey A Master before I copy it I wanted to share that there are words that we all live by in our D/s lifestyle, some resonate more than others, some take the parts that are appropriate for them and others find that the whole context stands out to their beliefs and protocols. For myself, I would have to say a lot of this resonates with me and my relationship with my Master.

A Master’s Creed:

As it is often important and often even necessary for one human being to have certainty and a clear understanding of the intentions, desires, motivations, and needs of another, I offer this testimony in trust and sincerity.

I am a dominant man. I am just that. I am not dominant because of any superiority on my part. Not because I feel more intelligent or wiser.

I am not dominant because of the strength or the mass of my body.

I am not, nor would I want to be dominant with all women.

Yet, to you I am Master.

I am your Master only after earning your trust and I embrace your submissiveness. I have looked into your heart and mind, and clearly see your desires and passions. You have thrown away your desires and passions. You have thrown away your fears and inhibitions. You tell me of the needs of your heart and body. You have given me total access to your soul, and I accept the responsibility and honor. You are a woman. You are not weak or inferior because of it. You are a treasure to be cherished. We are not equal. I have the strength of body and mind and the instinctive need to protect, possess, defend, and provide for you. You are a woman and instinctively stronger of will and heart. Your belief in me gives me courage and direction. Your strength disperses my doubt.

Your needs and desires encourage and give purpose to my efforts. We are not equal. We are halves of a whole. We complement each other and make each other complete. My desire to dominate you is instinctive. It is not to degrade you nor is it degrading to you because you are secure in being totally feminine. We each recognize and accept our worth, and our need for someone to trust and fulfill our needs.

You are sure, strong, and proud in your womanhood. You do not submit as acceptance of inferiority, but from strength and passion. You expect a man to stand strong and be a man. You desire and flourish in the strength and control of a man. In return you present control of your body, unqualified trust and honesty, and the faithfulness of your heart. You submit because I have earned your trust. Because I have opened my heart and soul to you. Because I have listened to your word with my ears and heart and have learned to anticipate your needs and emotions. And because I have proven worthy in your eyes, you have given me the only true treasure of life; you have given me dominance over you. What you give is not abnormal, but pure, natural, and the rarest gift a woman can give a man. You have given me complete and unshakable assurance of your commitment to me. Your submissiveness is a magnificent gift and sacred responsibility. I accept this from you with humility and joy. I understand the rarity and purity of this gift.

I recognize it is your body, mind, and soul. I dominate you only because you have allowed me to, and when I see your body kneel before me in my mind and heart, you are raised above all other women and all the treasures of the earth.

Within the bounds of our relationship…it is my duty to protect you, and that you will know, that under my care; NO harm will come to you as a result of actions taken by Me..or you. That is my responsibility, to protect you..from yourself if necessary. What you give freely cannot in reality be bought.

A submissive’s Creed:

i am a submissive woman…

i find pleasure, joy and fulfillment from being submissive to another in a loving relationship

i am not weak, or stupid. i am a strong woman, with firm views and a clear concept of what i want out of my life.

i do not serve out of shame or weakness, but out of pride and strength.

i look to my loving Master for guidance and protection, for never am i more complete than when He is with me.

i know that He will protect my body, my mind and my soul with His strength and wisdom.

He is everything to me, as i am everything to Him.

His touch awakens me and His thoughts free me.

Only in serving Him do i find complete freedom and joy.

His punishments are harsh, but i accept them thankfully, knowing that He has my best interests always foremost in His mind.

If He desires my body for pleasure, i shall joyfully give it to Him, and take pleasure myself from knowing that i have brought Him happiness.

However, the pleasure of the flesh is but one facet of any relationship.

The love, the trust and sharing, the words spoken and felt, those are all parts of this relationship.

my body is His, and if He says i am beautiful, then i am.

No matter what i look like to others, i am beautiful in His eyes, and because of that i hold my head high for who can tell me that my Master is wrong in seeing the beauty in me?

If He says i am His princess, then i am that…regal and graceful.

And if i see laughter at me in the eyes of others, i do not recognize it, for who are they to call my Master wrong?

If He says i am His toy, His slut, His tramp, then i am that…as wanton and dirty as He wants me to be, and if others do not see this, then it is they who are blind, not my Master.

my mind is His, to expand, to explore, to know as only He can.

i have no secrets from Him…for secrets are a thing that would keep me from being perfectly His.

Secrets would put a wall up between my Master and myself…and i do not want walls.

His lessons are not always ones i would seek on my own, but they are lessons He has decided i need, and so i learn from Him.

my soul is His, as bare to His touch as ever my skin could be when i kneel naked at His feet.

Never a moment goes by when i do not feel his presence, be He miles away or standing over me.

If i were to ever displease Him, His displeasure would be a blow to my soul, worse punishment than any lashes could be.

The anguish of my soul that i feel when i disappoint Him is harder to bear than the physical anguish i feel when His belt caresses me with fire.

i spend my days knowing that the energy and thought He puts into our relationship is as much for my benefit as for His, and look forward to each lovingly crafted scene that we do together.

i am His pleasure and His responsibility, and He takes both seriously.

i am a submissive woman. i am proud to call myself that.

my submission is a gift that i do not give lightly, and can only be given to One who can appreciate that gift and return it tenfold.

Only to He who has that strength will i give myself fully, because i am strong and proud.

Control

2011-12-08T21:10:00.001-08:00

Today is days 8 & 9 of my advent blogging, in keeping up my commitment to blogging every day til the 25th of December, I hope you are enjoying the journey I am on presently and perhaps you are writing an advent blog yourself! If so, comment below in the comment section with your blog link, I would love to read your stories!!

Its hard to believe that 2 weeks I will be having my birthday and then 2 days after it will be Christmas!! This year I, like the last few unfortunately, will be alone, it is not easy for me, I find myself become very withdrawn and isolated. My ties with my bio family are non existent and today ironically is my sister's birthday, to whom I did write a letter and wished her a very happy birthday :). The dysfunction in my family is not one that I want to be a part of, yet I do miss the bond of family. The same goes with those that I have allowed to become my chosen family.

I was reading a fellow bloggers post and must thank Emma of Jakeskajira for the idea. She wrote about control and how it affects her. This got me thinking about how control from Master makes me feel.

Overall, as much as I may grumble about chores and trust me there are plenty of days where I do, there are a lot of moments when I crave having the control exerted on me. Sure I may squabble over it, because I don't want to do it, or perhaps I am not in my "sub" mind frame, but wait, I am naturally a service submissive so doing housework, tending to the dogs, cats or litter box is normal for me. I'm not able to be tired, I'm not able to rest because these are things I know everyday that have to be done. There is just no way around it.

Master at times when he sees something that will be for my own growth and benefit, will usually suggest that I look into it. A good example is He is leaving for Christmas vacation to see family and I will be here. However, we have been talking about using Skype to communicate daily and He wants me to use the treadmill and I am expected to do as is expected of me. I understand why Master wants me to do my daily exercises which includes walking the dog as it is good for my health, but I must admit right now the "down feeling" I am familiar with has started to creep back in.

Not sure where exactly it is attached to, perhaps it isn't just one thing, the holiday season hasn't been a very happy time for me for a long time. I know my blog is meant for (at my choosing) to be about being a pin up model and my fetishes and growth around that. But sometimes real life creeps in and I find that having an outlet when I normally don't voice my private life, helps to take it off my chest.

Control at times means acceptance, and yes for me that means accepting the help from an unknown person that I know is putting a Christmas basket together for me, or it is the feeling of not knowing how I am going to insure my vehicle when it expires very soon and last but definitely not least the illness of my beloved pet.

Somehow the Disability I am on although it provides for a roof over my head and heat and light in my home, still has a stigma attached to it, and this time of year, it really makes me realize how much it affects me.

Master has a way of helping me see the good and positive in many things going on, even when the road seems bleak and dark, but unfortunately being home for the holidays no matter who is in my life, will be like any other day, except I will most likely do my treadmill and walk my dogs and anything else that I know I will be expected to do.

Communication and Consequences

2011-12-07T13:42:00.001-08:00

I keep forgetting to blog everyday, this would be #advent blogging for days 6 and 7, I find this rather ironic as the title suggested was Communication and Consequences.

I'm counting down the day until Christmas. I, with some other friends are blogging daily up until the 25th of December! I hope you are enjoying the reading and are blogging an advent yourself! If so, drop me a line with your blog link, I'd love to follow your stories!

The last 24 hours have really been an eye opener, I wish it were something fun and kinky. Oh how it would be so much better if it were BDSM related..

Master is very big on communication and consequences, which means if you don't say what you mean and mean what you say and there is a fall out that could have been prevented, chances are there will be consequences. Such as what has happened with me and a situation that involves a relationship that was part of my poly life. I am so very picky when I decide to involve another person that when things fall apart, and one person doesn't communicate their true feelings or what their true intentions are, I am left to wonder and feel very hurt and confused as to what is going on.

It takes me such a long time to get over that person because I am someone whose feelings do become involved and it seems no matter how well "I" communicate how and what I feel and what I am about, the other person seems to "tell you what you want to hear" versus the reality of something. I am tired of learning the reality from other people, after realizing on my own that not only does the deliberateness of avoidance from that other sting enough, but the words that follow. See, when someone tells me that we are friends, I take that to heart. I value my friends and even though I don't have arm loads of them, the ones I do have value me as a friend as well. Betrayal is something that is unforgivable in my books, the other is "lying by omission". You know what lying by omission is don't you? It is when someone tells you part of what they want to say, yet not fully telling you everything all the while THEY know what their true intentions are. So in essence you are leading the other person on.

The consequence is I am left feeling foolish for wanting to believe the words spoken to me and when the reality of what is in front of me is not what the words were told, the lying by omission stings a lot.

I am not afraid to call people on their shit, just as I expect and have had it done to me.

However, when someone's comments are a direct stab at my person whether it be my mental or emotional state, just shows me how immature you really are and I am happy there is no further communication.

Now let's get back to the really fun things.... where's my spanking....

Spanking I Love Lucy~

2011-12-04T19:10:00.001-08:00

Today I am combining my advent blogs day 2 and 3 as I was not able to blog yesterday.

Have you ever watched an episode of I Love Lucy? Besides the slap stick funnies, besides learning over the years that he was a very dominant man *and oh how yummy is that?*. It was a well known fact that the two of them incorporated the discipline into their marriage as well and vice versa.

My Master and I were talking about this, and it made me smile to know that Lucy was getting spankings and people didn't even bat an eye and this was in the 1950's! Can you imagine if they realized and learned that we have forums and the internet has shown and shared with us all the awesome sites so that we can perv our fetish for spankings.

I love that Master is head of our house and that there is something so sexy about Him being the Boss.

I decided while researching the episode I wanted to share I found this one and the comment came from that episode Dominant Ricky

I found this comment regarding Ricky being Dominant and it fits perfectly!!

"I like a man being the boss .. and with Ricky being from Cuba, where the men were the head of the home, it was quite fitting he would carry on the tradition in the U. S. They were a wonderful pair, loved each other totally, and I loved the show, I never tire of the reruns."

In case some of you haven't seen the episode that I was referring to on I Love Lucy here it is Ricky Ricardo's guide to marriage

For me Lucy is also a classic Pin Up Model and she is a fetish of mine. Her facial expressions, the clothes, the 1950's genre with her sexy Cuban husband Desi Arnaz, I really believe she and a few other beautiful women made up what the 1950's pin up model criteria would be. I love how curvy they were and seen as incredibly sexy women.

I've not had a spanking in quite sometime but that doesn't mean I've not pushed the limits from time to time *grins*. It is still one of my favorite fetishes, flogging is next but if you combine them both! Look out, happy girl will come shining through!

So what's your favorite fetish?

Laugh, Love and Live

Sierra

New Groups and Advent Calendar

2011-12-02T10:47:00.001-08:00

I've been hard at work making a new group on Facebook, feel free to join it! Langley Swap & Buy I got the idea from another group called Chilliwack Mom Swap/Buy as I've been selling my Master's items as he is downsizing to move in with me *happy girl*.

I've also decided to join my friend padmeamidala whose blog I follow Journey to the Darkside and do a daily #adventblog. She got the idea from a blogger she follows who I now follow Mija's blog thank you Mija for the idea!! Please check out Mija's blog if you are interested in joining us by having a countdown on your blog towards Christmas.

The idea is to blog everyday about whatever is on your mind, and do a countdown towards Christmas. This is day 1 for my #advent calendar.

I am going to copy and paste Mija's explanation (I hope she doesn't mind)

"If you do decide to play along there are no rules, no topics and no guilt for missing a day (I may struggle sometimes myself). But do let me know either here or on Twitter. I want to put a list of everyone Advent blogging on my posts."

"You're welcome to do the same or not, whatever seems the most fun. Don't feel you have to blog about any specific topic. My own will be about whatever is on my mind for the day, be it holiday related, kink related or some political topic I can't leave alone. My only suggestion is that you use this style "My Blog Title: Day X" so there's a countdown to the 25th."

I think it will be a lot of fun to do and look forward to following padmeamidala and mija's blogs daily. I also look forward to following other #advent blogs on our countdown to Christmas!!

Don't forget to join my new group on Facebook Langley Swap & Buy - what a great way to swap items or buy for Christmas!

Laugh, Live & Love

Sierra