Christmas Eve is an awful day to have a birthday. The time seems to fly by and with Christmas Eve service, fitting in a nice birthday dinner and cake seems almost impossible. In fact, this year it was. A cake for Eliza just didn’t happen.

I was determined that there was going to be cake. Because late cake is better than no cake at all, in my book. I’ll tell you what, Eliza was just as excited about her tardy birthday cake as she would have been on her birthday. Sweet, sweet girl. I’m thankful that she loves her imperfect mama.

Eliza called this her “White Velvet” cake. Perfect. I think that’s what I’ll start calling plain ‘ol yellow cake from now on, too. Sounds much fancier!
Either way, it was absolutely delicious and I wanted to eat the whole thing myself. We’ve (I’ve) been rationing it and there’s still have a little bit left. Cake at the end of a meal always seems like a great idea.

Now that there’s been cake, I feel like it’s official that I my baby girl is four years old. She let Daniel take some photos of her and me on her birthday. It’s was “our special day” after all.

And so, life with an eight year old, a six year old, and a four old carries on. Happy day! Happy life!

I’m still alive and well. . . But things are going to change around here. I’m moving towards closing this little space down soon. I’ve been blogging here for over five years and it feels like it’s time to say good-bye.

I’m hoping to start a new blog in the near future – one more food centric with splashes of family and life. I need a breathe of fresh air, blog-wise. You can understand that, right?
Thank you, thank you for all the kind “we miss you” emails. Sometimes life moves in ways that are beyond us. I deeply appreciate every one of you and wish I could sit down with a cup of tea and catch you up on everything!

But this will have to do for now. . .

Life is good; Daniel’s school is good, the kids are happy, I’m terrific, and Christmas is almost here! Hooray! First, though, we have a little girl turning four. So hard to believe!

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with some excellent (for me) news and a cute photo of my excited little people. . .

The awesome news: I’m NOT in premature menopause. I felt like the biggest weight fell off my shoulder when I was told this by a doctor – who I fought to see – and was actually qualified to make that statement. Huge, huge news! I have more testing to undergo to help the doctor figure out what exactly is wrong but for now, I’m reveling in the good news.

And. . .

Here’s my people (AKA: Rudolph and an Elf). I really love them. Christmas with small children rocks.

Much love and a very Merry Christmas to you!

Eve had her eight year old well-child visit at the doctor’s office yesterday. Our girl is perfectly normal in all regards except for her size, according to the doctor. Apparently the size “problem” trumped everything else about Eve. The doctor was so concerned over how tiny Eve is that she told me that I need to speak with a nutritionist. Believe me, I explained our diet every which way I could but she would not be appeased.

Now, Eve is tiny. Teeny tiny. At eight years old she is forty pounds and very petite in stature. But she is one healthy girl; she rides 5k’s on her bike regularly, she eats plenty of awesome food, sleeps for twelve hours a night, has shiny hair, plenty of energy, and smart as a whip in school. To Daniel and me, we have watched her follow the doctor’s weight/height graph lines all of her life, but only once make it onto the actual graph, she’s perfect. We see that God made her petite. To the doctor, though, her size was cause for great concern. So great was the emphasis that she caused Eve to ask me in private, “What’s wrong with me, Mom?” I promptly told her that nothing is wrong with her.

I wonder why the doctor couldn’t accept that Eve is healthy. Why she had to keep pointing me back to the chart and the red number that to her represents Eve’s healthfulness. Eve is growing and eating the best foods we can find, she is active and happy. . . Isn’t that what doctors want to see from their patients? Why does the graph have to be the indicator of health? Of normalcy? Why can’t the doctor’s eyes and common sense be the indicator?

Just some thoughts from the mother of a perfectly normal, petite, beautiful eight year old girl named Eve.

I call him Daniel. But he’s also known as “The Vacuum Clog Slayer.” He bought the (used) vacuum for me nearly six years ago. It was my present after I gave birth to Judah. I asked for a vacuum, just so you know. He didn’t end up in the doghouse because he bought me a vacuum cleaner and not diamonds. I was thrilled. Still am. With the man and the vacuum.

He can do anything. I’m convinced. Even bring a vacuum that should have been dead years ago, back to life again and again. He doesn’t even complain.

In the husband department, I scored big time.

Eliza has been anti-dinner lately. More of a stubborn, let’s see who’s in charge streak, I’d say.

Too bad she keeps running into “the wall.” In other words, “what Mama says goes.”

Mama says, “Girl, if you want to play, you have to eat.”

Eventually she eats. And then she plays.

Mama wins. Every time. Because I have to. No three year old is going to be in charge ’round here!

I did get stuck in traffic a couple of times – at one point it took me ten minutes to drive one and a half miles. . . welcome to city driving! But I made it to BAMC twenty minutes early. Victory! My appointment was better than I could have hoped for. The doctor was patient with me; he knew right away that my original diagnosis of premature menopause was correct, he explained in nitty gritty detail what is going on inside of my body, he answered all of my many questions, and tweaked my medications for me. I’m so thankful for the completely different experience than my last one.

I don’t actually want to talk about any of that, though. I felt like I owed you all an update, especially because it was a great one, however, what I really want to talk about is being at BAMC and the reality of war. (Most of you will be familiar with the name of the main medical facility here: BAMC – Brooke Army Medical Center.)

BAMC is a part of SAMMC – San Antonio Military Medical Center. SAMMC is the compilation of five medical facilities and is “ the largest inpatient medical facility in the Department of Defense, with 425 beds, the only Burn Center and the only Level 1 Trauma Center in the U.S. ”

BAMC is a hive of activity! I arrived at a little after eight in the morning and the main area was swarming with people. I didn’t spend any time taking the atmosphere in when I first arrived because I was so focused on getting to my appointment, but afterward I spent about ten minutes leaning against a back wall in the main entrance. Looking around that common area I was filled with incredible sadness. What an intense dose of the reality of war. I felt an overwhelming desire to take all the people who feel apathetic to the war we’re fighting or those that don’t feel any anguish over the lives that are sacrificed for freedom to BAMC. What a sober, sober place. Broken bodies littered the common area. Men, everywhere I turned with huge portions of their body missing, and that was only what the eye could see. There’s no accounting for the trauma of minds and hearts.

Living in this military community in San Antonio, I can’t help but be faced with war’s cost. It’s everywhere I turn. The commissary, the pharmacy, Target, church, the playground. Simply driving by the cemetery on Fort Sam Houston I am blinded by rows upon rows of plain white headstones – it makes me feel like I can’t breathe when I let the remembrance wash over me that each headstone was a life. Complete devastation. There are times, I freely admit, to entertaining questions about this war and war in general – having your husband and brother in the military will do that to a person – but I will never question the bravery and the sacrifice that more men and women than I could even imagine have displayed.

Most of us have no real idea of the cost of war. None at all. Our thankfulness for those, past and present, who have counted the cost and determined that freedom is worth it all will never be enough but it’a an awful good place to start.

The part of me that craves color went for the brightest flowers I could find. The sensible part of me went for the mums ’cause they last the longest. Happily I found the perfect combination of both.

Facebook Photo Album

Salt Creek Beach. Cold water. Good pizza. Pummeled by waves. Gorgeous beach. Sandy kids. Cool breezes. No worries.

Happiness.

Judah took this one. . .

And this one too.

Today we’re heading to the San Diego Zoo!

The best part of leaving for the airport this morning was that we only had to turn around one time because I forgot something. That’s awesome. And possibly a record. The kids were wide awake and excited as we drove through the city. Daniel and I came to the realization that we don’t really take the kids out at night. Like, ever. The city was new and thrilling and brightly lit this morning. Plenty of exclamations about that from the peanut gallery!

Our plane took off at six forty-five and we had a layover in Las Vegas. The kids were amazing. Perfect, polite, no fussing. We’ve flown quite a bit with them but this time was by far the easiest. Maybe it was because the kids are older or perhaps, and most likely, it was because Daniel was with me. Everything is easier when Daniel is with me.

Before we left Las Vegas we bought the kids cups of hot chocolate (One shot of chocolate, twelve ounces of whole milk, little bit of whipped cream. Perfect.) This was a first time thing and boy, were they stoked! I love how they all kept their mouths on the holes in the lid when we took off so that none of the liquid would spill out. Kids are awesome.

We arrived at nine-fifteen this morning in Riverside, California. I was, and still am, so tired. But happy! I haven’t seen my brother and sister-in-law in three years so it was awesome to be able to take this trip. Today was calm and fun – the kids enjoyed the pool in the backyard and Daniel and I have enjoyed catching up with David and Beth.

This is vacation to me – simple, fun, and spent with people that I love.