Shadi Korner

Tips for a Better Husband and Wife Relationship

2010-05-07T04:23:00.000-07:00

Although many Muslims may right now be in failing marriages and on a fast track to divorce and its terrible consequences, there are many ways to put their marriage back on the right track if the husband and wife are sincere in their desire to reconcile. The following principles can be used by Muslims whose marriages are already in trouble or by Muslims who would like to avoid trouble in their

Muslim Women Working Outside the Home

2010-05-05T11:52:00.000-07:00

Many families, especially in the West, consider it normal and even necessary for the wife to have a job outside the home---either to make ends meet or to make it possible for the family to maintain a certain quality of life. Presented below is an Islamic view on women working outside the home. Disintegration of Families: However, the family in the West is disintegrating, and many believe that

The Ideal Muslim Husband: A Review

2010-04-26T21:24:00.000-07:00

Most Muslim men would like to be ideal husbands. And most Muslim women would, no doubt, like to be married to one. But, for some reason, the men are not ideal husbands, and the women will almost surely admit that they didn't marry one. So, why the discrepancy between our sincere aspirations and reality? Is it an inability on the part of the man, an impossible goal; or is it perhaps that we do not

Selecting a Marriage Partner

2010-04-07T23:36:00.001-07:00

Marriage is recommended for partners who share a common way of life. The matrimonial partners should be able to fulfill their purpose of creation as defined by Allah. They should be able to effectively carry out their responsibility as care-takers (khalifah) of earth. They should share the common goal of building a well integrated Muslim community and be able to work harmoniously towards it.

How to Help Muslims Get Married: Tips for Imams

2010-04-07T23:34:00.001-07:00

Imams in North America do more than deliver a weekly Khutbah and lead prayer. They are, whether they and others realize it or not, responsible for their community's emotional and psychological well-being as well. So Imams don't just officiate marriages. They have to become involved with them as well. This role can take three main forms. 1. Being a guardian for sisters Alhamdulillah, a large

How to Help Muslims Get Married: Tips for Parents

2010-04-07T23:33:00.000-07:00

Sad but shocking reality: the divorce rate amongst Muslims in North America is one of the highest in the world. According to New York-based Muslim sociologist Ilyas Ba-Yunus, Muslims in Canada and the U.S. have a divorce rate of 33 percent. The world's highest is the general U.S. population's of 48.6 percent, followed by the United Kingdom's of 36 percent. Many assume divorce means problems

6 Etiquettes of Seeking a Spouse: An Islamic Perspective

2010-04-06T23:51:00.001-07:00

Muslim conferences and conventions (like the one being held by the Islamic Society of North America & Muslim American Society, Imam W. D. Mohammad, this Labor Day weekend) are just one of the many places Muslims in North America often meet potential spouses either to make a decision or to initiate the marriage communication process. Other places include fundraising dinners, regional seminars,

Purpose and Obligation

2010-04-06T23:47:00.001-07:00

Definition of Marriage Nikah is an Arabic term used for marriage. It means "contract". ("Aqd in Arabic). The Quran specifically refers to marriage as "mithaqun Ghalithun,". Which means "a strong covenant". "and they have taken a strong pledge (Mithaqun Ghalithun) from you?" (Quran 4:21) The seriousness of this covenant becomes obvious when one finds the same tern i.e., Mithaqun Ghalithun,

An-Nikah The Marriage

2010-04-06T23:43:00.000-07:00

Mutual Agreement of Bride and Groom Marriage (nikah) is a solemn and sacred social contract between bride and groom. This contract is a strong covenant (mithaqun Ghalithun) as expressed in Quran 4:21). The marriage contract in Islam is not a sacrament. It is revocable. Both parties mutually agree and enter into this contract. Both bride and groom have the liberty to define various terms and

Restricted relations for Marriage

2010-04-01T04:38:00.000-07:00

Marriage is forbidden between very close blood relations and between those individuals who were both breastfed by the same woman (see wet nurse). See also mahram for a fuller discussion of unmarriageable kin; Muslims are free to marry anyone not in these prohibited classes. Abu Hurairah narrated: The Prophet forbade that a woman should be married to a man along with her paternal aunt or with

Punjabi wedding traditions

2010-04-01T04:31:00.000-07:00

Punjabi wedding traditions and ceremonies are traditionally conducted in Punjabi and are a strong reflection of Punjabi culture. The actual religious marriage ceremony - among Sikhs and Muslim the weddings are conducted in Punjabi or Urdu; among Hindus, the wedding is often conducted in Sanskrit. There are commonalities in ritual, song, dance, food, and dress. The Punjabi wedding has many

CELIBACY

2010-04-01T04:19:00.000-07:00

The Sunna of the Prophet (s) was marriage, and he regarded total celibacy as unnatural and against the will of Allah. Anas ibn Malik recorded the case of a man who decided that all troubles were caused by marriage, and so instead of marrying he would pass his life in prayer. When this came to the attention of the Prophet (

Wedding In Pakistan

2010-03-31T02:21:00.001-07:00

UBTAN Uptan is a paste made from turmeric, sandalwood powder, herbs and aromatic oils, which groom's mother brings for bride. She blesses bride and applies “uptan’ to the bride's hands and face. Groom's sister also does the same, and a thick string called a “gana” is tied to the bride’s

Turning S-e-x Into Sadaqa

2010-03-30T22:55:00.003-07:00

An excerpt from 'The Muslim Marriage Guide', By Ruqaiyyah Waris Maqsood (Amana Publications), reprinted in Beliefnet.com"Women shall have rights similar to the rights upon them; according to what is equitable and just; and men have a degree of advantage over them." (Quran, 2:216) They do indeed! This passage of the Holy Quran was revealed in connection with the rights of women following a

WET DREAMS (ihtilam)

2010-03-30T22:34:00.001-07:00

These usually happen when people are sexually frustrated, and are a mechanism whereby the body seeks to discharge excess sexual energy or sperm. They can happen to either sex. Both A'isha and Umm Salama asked the Prophet (s) about this subject, and were told it was natural. Ghusl is of course required afterwards.

WEDDINGS

2010-03-30T22:33:00.002-07:00

It is sunna to hold a feast (walima) for a wedding. This is part of the duty to make the marriage public. The Prophet (s) said: `Publicise this marriage; celebrate it in the mosques; sound the tambourines to mark it!' (Tirmidhi.) Al-Rubayyi bint Muawwidh narrated: `The Messenger of God (s) visited me the

WASHING

2010-03-30T22:33:00.000-07:00

Allah has ordained that ghusl should be carried out (a) after sexual intercourse (meaning penetration of the penis beyond its head), or whenever an orgasm has occurred (in men and women); (b) after menstruation; (c) after post childbirth bleeding. (Suras 2:222; 4:43; 5:7.) (d) after wet dreams This involves making a niyya

UNISEX

2010-03-30T22:27:00.001-07:00

The Blessed Prophet had a great respect for natural distinctions. He did not like men who try to resemble women, and women who try to resemble men'. (Bukhari.) Be proud of your gender, and ask yourself whether you have the virtues specific to your sex, as exemplified in the lives of the great male and female Companions.

TOLERANCE (tasamuh).

2010-03-30T22:26:00.003-07:00

Remember that husband and wife, however compatible, will always be two different people. Live and let live - do not try to force somebody else to be what they are not; it never works, and only causes resentment. Accept people for what they are and love them `warts and all'. Be tolerant, forgiving, and understanding, as far

TIMING

2010-03-30T22:24:00.003-07:00

It is bad manners to leave your sexual activity until you have gone to bed exhausted. It is a kind of insult, and a marital timebomb. People's sleep patterns are important: if a husband comes to bed at midnight, while the wife has dropped off just after the last prayer, midnight may feel early to him and she may be groggy

TEMPTATION

2010-03-30T22:21:00.000-07:00

Just because a person gets married, they are not suddenly made blind, or incapable of feeling a sudden urge for someone outside the marriage. It is vital that one deals promptly with the urge, so that the marriage partner is not hurt, the marriage is not weakened, and the possibility of major sin is averted.

TEASING AND MENTAL CRUELTY

2010-03-30T22:16:00.001-07:00

This is not permissible. Most women get very hurt by their husband's hankering after beautiful women on TV, videos, or in magazines. Husbands should learn the Islamic virtues of tact and contentment, and realise that a wife is not a model or a film-star, and may have all sorts of physical defects - but she loves you very

SPORT

2010-03-30T22:14:00.001-07:00

It is a sunna to remain fit, and several types of sport are specifically recommended. They should not, of course, turn into an obsession. If the husband has to play sport every Saturday or Sunday, the wife should learn to live with this and use the time for things she can do better while he is out of the way. Husbands -

REWARD FOR SEX

2010-03-30T22:09:00.003-07:00

The Prophet (s) actually spoke of a man's unselfish sexual fulfillment of his wife's needs as a sadaqa: `In every declaration of subhan Allah there is a sadaqa; in every takbir, in every al-hamdu li'Llah, in every la ilaha illa'Llah, in every enjoining of good there is sadaqa. Forbidding that which is evil is

REFUSING SEX

2010-03-30T21:53:00.001-07:00

Unless there is a genuine and legitimate reason, the refusal of the partner's advances is forbidden in Islam. It is a hurtful rejection. Men and women should realise that sometimes the partner has a very strong urge, which may prevent sleep, and should be kind. The texts of Shari'a affirm that the wife, too,