above the fray

from blah to beautiful in a day

2014-10-26T16:58:00.000-05:00

You know those days when you feel like blah for no reason? Except there are reasons? This sort of day happened to me recently. I was missing my family like cray. I'm still in transition so everyday feels like I'm a tester for roller coasters, and people are showing me who they are and for better or worse, I am believing them. I've recently realized and accepted the fact that sometimes our hearts intertwine and stay that way forever just because. Other times, we fully face and seek to embrace the reality that shelf lives, seasons, and expiration dates are for real. Another reason that propelled me into blah-dom: In the same night, I experienced euphoric heights of love and connection with my tribe, and then somehow crash landed into a desolate island where foolishness had gone to seed and taken root. The juxtaposition was a jarring yet poignant reminder of what I choose to embrace and that which I can entertain no longer...

All of these feelings were a cocktail of contrasting emotions. Sitting on top of my own turbulent heart sensations were the tough situations of folks I love and adore. It was all too much and I woke up with a sense of drowning in overwhelm. Flying down the highway I said a whine of a prayer that went something like this: Please help. Everything feels so harsh right now. Like it's all too much and I am not feeling the love. The very thing I thought would heal me has brought me undone. It feels like I cannot sense love and beauty anymore. Open my eyes and help me see. Help, help, help.

I floundered and felt bottomed out emotionally for a few hours, but I kept pushing through--on the verge of tears--taking one step at a time. A phone call from my favorite uncle was the first sign. His call was the lifter of my head. We talked for hours and it was food to my soul. Food. To my soul, yall. Monarch butterflies were the next omen. All day, everywhere I went, they fluttered nearby and made my heart leap. Their orange wings brought me hope for the present moment. Even Neighbor was involved without knowing. She rounded out the trifecta when she so lovingly ran an errand for me. I didn't ask or expect her to yet she *always* does things like this for me; however, on this particular day, she delivered a loving message from the librarian. Her exact words that echoed in my heart: You are loved by even librarians.

God's answer was undeniable: See the beauty and feel the love because it is SO there.

Earth Angels are real yall!

The day could have ended right there for me because I truly received the message and my heart was full; however, "my cup runneth over" when my doorbell rang and a true Earth Angel was standing on my porch with the most glorious bouquet I have EVER seen. Blow me away, sweet Baby Jesus. We talked, took a ride together, and then talked some more. Just being with Earth Angel undid the crash landing, unraveled the overwhelm, and healed another little piece of my heart. Friends, there is hope for the present moment. May you see the beauty and feel the love. May your overwhelm come undone and your heart receive sweet healing. If you need a sign, just ask. Surely it will come (tweet it).

transitions

2014-05-19T18:02:00.000-05:00

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Anybody other than me going through some major transitions and changes right now? Lord, I sure do hope I ain't the only one. While I welcome change and transition like I would welcome a beloved, lifelong friend, somehow I always seem to forget how difficult periods of alteration can be. So as I sit smack dab in the middle-- well, hopefully, more like three quarters of the way into this leg of my life journey, I can see how I've grown and matured in some ways. I've learned to take things like this in stride a bit better than before. I've always known and chosen to believe that no matter what happens, I am going to be alright. Nevertheless, there is still a small part of me that wants to throw a tantrum, pout it out, then sit down and have a real good cry. Why? Because everything feels so raw. I feel extremely vulnerable and fragile because I have no idea about the ultimate plan and the unfolding timeline of events. I've done all I can, and now, I must trust the process. And wait. It feels like I'm standing in a corridor. Just standing. Out here. Unable to go into a room yet. You know, just hanging out in the hallway. It's dark and it's awkward because I can hear the buzz of activity going on behind the doors that are around me-- even though I'm not currently immersed in any of those worlds. I'm waiting for the light to come on, for a door to fly open so that I can walk in dancing. I've done all I know to do, so now I'm waiting: Learning patience. Resting: Learning more about Self Care. Playing: Learning what Play looks like to me now in this stage of Life. Keeping my friends close and letting the drama and its minstrels fade into oblivion. Even though it feels uncomfortable, I know I am in a really good space. Transition seems hardest when I'm trying to look cool, calm, and in control of the ride; however, when I let go of my perceived route and just roll with the reoccurring recalculations of the GPS, then (and only then) does the light turn on in the hallway. And in that illuminated moment, I realize that I've got this. And by this, I mean that I can jam, dance, laugh, and sing because my only job right now is to rock out in the hallway, and then keep the party going when the right door swings open.

about giving people flowers...

2013-05-09T22:48:00.000-05:00

My Grandaddy, my Mom's Dad, used to always say, "Give people their flowers while they're living." He was a passionate preacher and hard-working patriarch who did not take no mess. He lived by strong spiritual truths and convictions and he held up the plumb line for others as well. Before I tell you about the flowers scenario, I want to make sure you know that my Grandaddy was gangster. Seriously. He was too legit to quit decades before M.C. Hammer was even born. Let me share a few gems from the treasure chest of memories:

When hoodlums vandalized our church, he got on the news with his shotgun and said he would shoot the people if they came back. He was not joking. And he may or may not have locked and loaded his shotgun during the interview...

tulips from my garden :)

Early meant on time for him. He worked a job for 40+ years and was late by two minutes ONE time. Yes, late one time in 40+ years. An accident on the freeway brought traffic to a complete stop for 30+ minutes and this is the reason why he was two minutes late. You'd think one slip up in 40+ years would be acceptable, ok even. No. He felt like that was a mar on his record. Anytime he was going somewhere, he left waaaaay early and had NO problem leaving you if you weren't ready to go. He left me and my Granny *plenty* of times before we finally gave up on the notion of riding anywhere with him. LOL

He sang loud and changed the key of the song whensoever he pleased. We were song-jacked in church all the time. And like idiots, we would continue to start out singing congregational hymns in the key of G only to be redirected to the key of C whenever he decided to come in singing, which was usually around the second stanza.

He would call you out in front of Jesus, Mary, Saint Peter, Joseph and whoever else was present. If you were doing foolywank, he had no problem letting you know the error of your ways and that he would not and could not co-sign on your foolery. He meant it in love, but that did not stop the sting of the truth.

So now that you know and understand his gangsterness, let me tell you about this sweet, tender and endearing flower saying. It is the ultimate challenge to express love and appreciation to folks on the daily. A reminder to let people know how I feel about them and what they mean to me while the blood is still running warm in our veins. It is a reminder that I do not need to wait until someone has passed away to declare my love and their importance to me because I can do this everyday in many, many ways. All that matters is that I do it. I really try my best to let people know exactly what they mean to me. That I love them. Dearly. When my Grandaddy died and when my brother died, we did not buy flowers because we had already given them their flowers while they were living.

Why don't you give someone a flower today? Let their heart savor its precious scent knowing that unlike flowers from the store, these special flowers my Grandaddy was talking about will last forever and ever and ever.

yeah, I suck my thumb... so what?!

2013-04-10T16:29:00.001-05:00

I don't suck my thumb, but my kiddo does and when people make uninvited comments and antiquated assessments about it, I am momentarily baffled. Why? Mainly because my child is Minding His Business (perhaps these people need to take a page out of that book?) and neither of us asked for personal opinions on thumb sucking. I've noticed that people just trudge right on in to uninvited territory to say, you're too old to be sucking your thumb or stop that. We just look at the offender like they're a fool. And they are. Because offering an opinion when no one cares what you think--evidenced by the fact that they didn't ask-- is synonymous with foolery. Typically I want to offer them a warm glass of shut the hell up or quip off some uninvited advice of my own: yeah, you're too old to be tanning and orange isn't a good color for skin anyway... or maybe you should try thumb sucking instead of smoking, drinking, overeating or whatever... or Hey there Stranger, thanks for the ten second voluntary parenting tip, but no thanks. Really.

But then I remember that

a) mean is ugly
b) I need to treat people the way I want to be treated

c) responses like that are not representative of my best self

d) it's best to respond with the truth in love

So, I end up saying (with a smile!) something along the lines of you know, we're not worried about it, so you don't need to be either... or he'll know when it's the right time to stop sucking his thumb... or my husband sucked his thumb when he was a kid and he's an awesome guy, so pretty sure, he'll be just fine too.

Sounds much better than shut the hell up, right?

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So me and my cute lil' thumb sucker move right along happy and carefree as ever. And then later on I started to wonder: Why do we think we have the right to tell someone else-- who we are not in charge of-- what to do? While I am a fan of encouragement and challenge even (when relationship warrants it and it is absolutely necessary) I do not believe we have the right to verbalize indignation and concern over the personal preferences of another, especially when these personal preferences are not hurting or infringing upon the rights of others. When and why did we stop taking the time to care, question and perhaps understand rather than make swift comments and harsh judgments about such trivial matters? It's foolywank. So please, let's stop offering our uninvited opinions and stop attempting to boss the lives of others, which will help us all look a little less foolish, really. What do you say we all get outraged, undignified, bossy and nosey about the things that actually matter like poverty, prejudice, sickness, disease, and injustice? United we could do so much to exact change in a positive and meaningful way. I wholeheartedly believe we could make a difference where it counts, and if a thumb sucker is in our midst, so be it.

naming things

2013-03-27T21:18:00.000-05:00

I really like to name inanimate objects. Been doing this my whole life. I have named every car I ever owned:

Dakota
Piccolo ("pick-uh-low")
Isabelle
Bruno
Bella
Big Blue (this name came with the car, actually)
Bessie
Moose
Charles Xavier
Lucypearl

I even nicknamed two of Neighbor's cars:
Delores
Comanche

I also nickname my favorite people:

Mig
Wee
Sithy
Neighbor
Mendell
Reet
A.Y.A
CUZIN
Muffy

This list is not comprehensive because there are too many names to list; however, these names may come from shortened or extended versions of original names. Sometimes I add an extra syllable or make up a new name altogether. I may call them by their last name, first and last name or first name with a faux middle name (usually Lee, June or Mae). Why do I do this? Because...

Nicknames are love.

when god bless you goes wrong

2013-03-18T22:19:00.000-05:00

I have noticed an oddly disturbing, awkwardly interesting trend. People throwing a fit, acting a fool, lashing out or just being plain hateful and then tacking a good ol' God bless you at the end. I don't have a problem with people throwing fits as I have been know to throw my own from time to time, and hey, we all act a fool now and again. Lashing out and being hateful can happen to the best of us if the irritations align just right. To have our differences, air our grievances and live with the consequences, this is just part of the human experience, I guess; however, tacking God bless onto the end of such foolishness is what I find to be intolerable. "I don't like you. I never did and you smell like poop, so stay away from me. Forever. God bless."

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Can we stop doing that already? If someone smells like poop, talk about it, deal with it, offer soap, deodorant or whatever. Address the issue. And if you can't, agree to disagree and keep on truckin'. There is no need to do life with people who irk the dickens out of you or insist on rocking the stink. And by all means, if you aren't received, shake the dust off your feet and keep it moving, but in the name of all things holy, do not tell somebody off and then throw in a God bless at the end for some semblance of good measure. Keep the faux-grace. Why? I don't know... maybe because telling people off and God bless you don't go together. Or perhaps that God bless you makes vitriolic comments seem justified and palatable. A faux God bless you takes the ugliest behavior and attempts to pass it off as sanctified. So please, save the God bless you for a truly sincere, loving and heartfelt expression. You know, one that is not crass, caustic, and childish with rapid-fire emotionalism on display. Let's work through our differences with a deep reserve of love and respect, patience, an openness to seeing the other point of view, and mindfulness. Because really, to say God bless you is to say, You are God's child and you are loved. And something about that statement just does not mix well with an attempt to rip someone to shreds. I love you and God bless!!! (hahahahaha I HAD TO!!!)

But really, God bless.

dear daylight savings time, you suck

2013-03-11T02:20:00.000-05:00

Can anyone tell me why in THE hell we still carry on with this Fall back and Spring forward nonsense? It's 2am and I'm sitting here wide awake. (sidenote: I did accidentally drink an iced coffee around 8:45pm which has further exacerbated the situation.) Feels like I read somewhere that all this time ~~travelling~~ changing is to help the farmers. You know, give them maximum daylight hours for sowing and reaping. And if that is the case, well, OK because I love to eat and I sure do appreciate the farmers who help to make that happen. But so help me sweet baby Jesus, if there is no doggone good reason for this chronological tomfoolery, I am going to do something like move to Arizona because at least there they have sense enough to leave time the hell alone.

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we all have super powers... for reals

2013-03-10T23:43:00.001-05:00

The other day on Facebook, someone that I barely know messaged me asking where they could hear my music. I am in the process of copyrighting my original music (not to mention the ongoing saga that is life: dishes, family time, honey time, self time, home school, dinner, play time... I know you get the drift...) and in the midst of singing and speaking gigs that come to me by word of mouth, it just hadn't occurred to me to put myself out there like that until BAM! Someone that I didn't know was a'asking. So, I got my Google on and figured out how to tack some musical goodness onto my Facebook page, which got me to thinking how easy it is to hide our light under a bush for whatever reason. Whatever the reason--whether it is intentional (you know, playing small to try and make others feel better about themselves), false humility (aka low self esteem) or whatever else that's been pulled from the bag of tricks-- it is wrong. Wrong. We are supposed to let our light shine and share our giftedness as a beacon of light, love and encouragement. *Please note that shine is not synonymous with narcissism.* It's more of a I shine, You shine, We all shine sort of thing. That we share our love and passion (whatever it may be!) with others and then listen closely for theirs.

Thank you, Laura & Tony

There is tremendous freedom in knowing and honoring ourselves and each other. It is a life long discovery, an evolutionary process of course, but as I look back over my life, I realize this: I repeatedly find myself using truth and the power of my voice. Shushed repeatedly throughout school (Kindergarten to college, no lie!) and even at home, I realize now that this voicebox is my gift to the world. My money maker. Effortless and as easy as breathing because it is who I am. And hate it or love it, I ain't going no where. Neither are you. See, we all have a special something to contribute to this mixing pot. So I really want you to think about what you have to offer. What consistent threads remain throughout the test of time in your life? Focus on the good (not the bad!) and herein you will find the secret, the truth, really, of who you were born to be. I change and positively impact the world with the power of my voice by singing, writing and speaking authentic truth.

That's my super power. What's yours?

is it ever too late to apologize?

2013-02-17T15:53:00.000-06:00

"Apologize for mistakes. Apologize for unintentionally hurting someone -- profusely. But don't apologize for being who you are." -Danielle LaPorte

I am smitten by this quote. I find it equal parts encouraging and validating with whipped cream and a cherry of truth on top. It is the bomb.

Apologize. Sincerely. Profusely. Somehow, the word apology and all that it encompasses and entails has become watered down. These days apologies come bound with a back hand slap and a hardcore responsibility shrug thrown in for good measure. What if we really took the initiative to own our stuff? To say, this is mine. I own it and if I did it wrong, I apologize and I will do my doggone best to make it right. When a necessary or overdue apology lingers, it inhibits real relationship, connectivity, love and growth. These things simply cannot flourish unless forgiveness abounds.

You see, a sincere and humble apology can begin the healing process. For a severed relationship. For those who were affected. For you.

Sometimes our actions (that later warrant an apology) may be unintentional. Other times, they may be maliciously intentional. Apologize either way because if it's your dung, you need to claim it before it gets super stinky or rapidly dispersed by the fan.

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"Don't apologize for being who you are." I'm loving that right now. I'm living that right now and the wisdom of Dr. Seuss reminds me: the people who matter don't mind and the people who mind don't matter. So profound. So simple. So true. I gotta be me and you gotta be you. Let's remember to ask forgiveness when we need to. That is all. xo

happy giveaway day!

2013-02-14T12:19:00.000-06:00

Fun freebies just for you! If you win, that is.

To enter? Share your favorite song in the comment section below the blog post.

If you're like me, you have several favorite songs and that's allowed. Totally ok, actually. You can list a fav or all of em if ya want!

To win? Random.org will be use to select ze winner.

This here giveaway is sponsored by Smile On Paintings + yours truly.

No one's paying anyone to say or do anything. I asked the folks at Smile On to host and they gladly + graciously accepted. I threw some stuff in the mix too. You know cause I like to share the good stuff and I love ya too!

OK, so here's the good stuff:

"Night Trip"

Do you know about Smile On Paintings?

There's some beautiful and passionate art going on over there.

Please go view the lovely pics on FB and say hello!

I personally know the owner + family and they are good peeps.

Legit. Lovely. Kind-hearted. Sincere. Sweet sweet peeps.

Smile On paints whatever floats their boat + commission pieces too!

(I've got an order in the making!)

Two cute BANGLES!!!!

One beaded. One blingy

A fabulous set of votives!

Aren't they blingy, diamond-y, shiny adorable-ness?

They'd be cute in a bathroom, a bedroom (chicka bow wow!) or anywhere really.

And this my loves, is NOT a pillow, it's a corn sack.

What's a corn sack, say ye?

It is fabulous old school homemade goodness that can be used as an ice pack or a heating pad.

I have one. I LURVE it so I figured you would too.

Best part? It's handmade with love and prayers of blessing by a dear friend.

It comes with it's own lil' homemade pouch.

Isn't she lovely?!?

This ~~trifecta~~ ~~quadratic equation~~ ...

These seven items can be yours if the price is right!

Not really.

All ya gotta do is enter a song you love in the comment section below.

Couldn't resist the shout out to Bob Barker though! #rip

I hope you win this fabulous assortment of random prizes.

There's something for everyone in the mix!

And one last thing...

never ever ever ever forget: YOU ARE LOVED.

p.s. contest ends tonight, Feb 14, 2013 at midnight CST

exit stage left

2013-01-21T13:30:00.001-06:00

I have always loved exits. I am very aware whenever it is time for a change to occur. Sometimes I am way ahead of the curve with this realization; however, this sort of heightened awareness has been spot-on time and time again in my life. I can appreciate the standard exits and transitions of life. For instance, high school and college graduation: I was emotional, yet more excited and eager to move on to the next level. I am learning to appreciate the larger shifts: when a close relationship ends or someone you love dies. Exits can be seemingly slight alterations (turn left now, make that call later today, ask right now) or emotionally monumental milestones (forgive them again, let it go, move on, relocate, quit this job). Whatever the prod, I am always listening. And willing. Just the other day I realized that I have always loved exits. Really. At first I didn't know why, but now I do. It's because endings and beginnings are so intimately intertwined.

opinions...everybody's got one

2013-01-17T18:35:00.000-06:00

Same with bellybuttons and butt cracks. It's time to bring back the lost art of knowing when and when not to keep your opinion to yourself. If someone asks what you think or if you are encouraging and lifting someone's countenance, go for it! I'm all about that! But if you are waxing nostalgic on the great depth of your knowledge + your right-ness, you can save that garbage for the trash can. Nobody wants to hear anything from a know it all. So let's go ahead and shut that down--like--forever.

My mode for sharing my opinion goes something like this: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind? <--That last one trips me up sometimes, so I have asked close friends, "What is the kind way to say ____?" whenever it is lost on me. Also, having a relationship (a significant amount of time together, intimate conversation + connection, love, kinship, friendship, respect... some sort of SOLID foundation) is KEY. Do NOT try lecturing or opining when you ain't got no in-road, ain't nobody asked, and what you're saying is not marinated in utter compassion + conviction.

On Twitter the other day I saw the most hilarious tweet by @majani_: "A detailed list of people who asked for your opinion: _______ _______ _______ _______ _______ _______ _______" It LITERALLY made me laugh out loud. What a poignant reminder to mind ya bidness! xoxoxo

college homies

2013-01-16T19:28:00.000-06:00

I had a fabulous college experience. I met some of the most wonderful peeps (including my husband!) and it is absolutely delightful whenever I get to talk or re-connect with my college friends. Recently, I got to hang with a few of my college pals. We were brought together by way of marriage. A former wingmate salsa-ed her way into holy matrimony and as a result, we fell right back into our high spirited, fun and mischievous ways. Here are few quotables from our time together:

1. THIS IS WHY YOU DON'T STAY-- said when you have been roped into handling responsibilities that are not your own because you lingered too long. This phrase is to be said with a eyes set straight, mouth on smirk and head gently shaking no-no. Expert at doing this: KRC

2. plomantic- when a friendship has crossed the platonic line but has yet to fully cross the romantic line, so you're both hanging out in what seems like no-man's-land. Somewhere between platonic and romantic; a combination of the words PLatonic and rOMANTIC; this little gem was coined by yours truly ;)

3. You go on one roommate-a-date and now you're breastfeeding that man's baby--said in an attempt to capture/reconcile/understand all the time that has passed between now and then. KRC once again.

4. THE perfect description of our beloved Senora. She was summed up perfectly by SJC: "Seize the day has nothing on this woman. She wakes up and murders the day." #donquixotemeetsJackBauer #venticuatro

There is SO much more... cooking dough, an eggplant that spills out, moments that take 7 years off your life, Boo, you like like an alien... I could go on, but I'd be writing forever and I can't just give it all away, you know. I will say this: these girls have a piece of my heart and I like to think that I have a piece of theirs. We laugh hard, keep it real, love fiercely, and we share and savor life. Celebrate your special peeps today and everyday. Give them a call, send em a text, do something. My Grandaddy used to always say, Give people their flowers while they're living. So, here's a bouquet, Imago Dei!

it is what it is

2013-01-14T15:35:00.001-06:00

There are some people I just don't like. There are some people that just don't like me. We've talked about this before. Remember oil and water, baby, oil and water? It is what it is until it's something different.

Some attractions resonate while others repel. I do not fully understand this, but I have finally accepted it. Again. Some interactions reverberate. Others straight irritate. See it for what it is. Then bless it with Love. Bless the Lovers and keep em close. Bless the Haters and gently let go.

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Life is a processional, you know. So keep it moving. Trust the process. Filter the emotions. At some point, you will make sense of it all. Until then, just let the mixture be. Rise to the top, Great One. And then keep it moving.

Onward. Upward. Forward.

humpty dumpty was not an egg

2013-01-10T08:34:00.000-06:00

Which makes me wonder who decided that he was?

When you read the story, there is no evidence that supports the assertion that has prevailed throughout the annals of history. Yes, Humpty Dumpty sat, had a great fall, and subsequently broke, but who is to say that HD wasn't a glass trinket, fine china or an exquisite vase (pronounced "vahs" of course). For all we know, Humpty could have been Tennessee Williams' inspiration for The Glass Menagerie. The king's horses and men ain't nowhere around to be testifying to accuracy of this here egg business, you know.

And if Humpty was an exquisite "vahs"... what a demotion?! Cracked glass beats a cracked egg in my book any day. Both are a pain to clean up, but to be broken and blinging or broken and oozing yellow? Why, that's a no brainer.

Which gets me to thinking...

Let no one write your story for you, dear.

Sometimes people mix up the details.

Or their vantage point may be a tad blurry.

So YOU be the writer of the script, the dreamer of the dream,

the speaker of destiny and truth as it pertains to you.

Let your words towards yourself be seasoned with grace and encouragement.

May faith forever be your plumb line.

YOU be your greatest cheerleader.

Promote yourself like a champion.

Dance around the ring like a prizefighter.

Be your own sponsor

and no matter how long a particular story has been told about you,

don't be afraid to rewrite it.

Because you can.

leave room for yourself

2013-01-09T15:56:00.000-06:00

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your joys, your hopes, your dreams

those moments that make your heart flutter

the activities that set your soul free

leave room for yourself to

enjoy

explore

learn

evolve

and grow

kiss your life

daily

because

it is a good life

really

too often we lose ourselves

in our job

title

or family role

enjoy the many hats you wear

just remember to change into

your favorite cap often

smile

laugh

giggle

do what you love

always

leave room for yourself.

a book that is fab

2012-12-11T15:16:00.000-06:00

Guess what! My gal pal, Holly, just self published an amazing book! It's called 5 Things- Holiday Style: Making the Season Meaningful. Affordable. Unforgettable. It is a 3 month holiday celebration guide full of traditions, recipes, and stories that will make you laugh and cry! (Cry in a good way, of course... not the ugly cry.) The best thing is the traditions and activities are applicable to every age and stage of life. This books is for parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles... anyone who wants to use it, really. Holly is the type of friend who always has goooood ideas that are thoughtful, timeless and deeply significant. She is the reason why my family and I write a prayer to Jesus and keep it in our Christmas stocking year after year. The first year we did this, our child (who was unable to write at the time) dictated 4 pages of notes! Talk about precious!!!

I just got my 2011 prayer out of my stocking and read it. It touches me to the core and moves me to tears. I can see so many prayers answered as well as areas where I am still growing and learning. I tell ya, a tradition like that is invaluable. Holly also introduced me to the term "age appropriate" (which we use like gangbusters around these parts) and her delectable pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. I eat the cookies in one bite I don't even like pumpkin. They're that good.

I'm not telling you about this book because Holly is my friend. I mean, that's part of it, but really, I'm sharing it with you because it is fabulous and you know I love to share the good stuff! This book is like a cheat sheet of delicious eats, games, anecdotes, traditions and fun for every budget and stage of life. 5 Things- Holiday Style encompasses all that we all deeply desire to give, experience and share with the people we love year after year. It encourages faith, love and provides the mechanics to create awesome opportunities for memory making. All the tips, tidbits and traditions apply to both older and younger children, so everybody is included! My bragging doesn't even do it justice, so please check it out for yourself! If you're interested, you can order it on Amazon or Create Space. I bought a copy for myself and a copy for a friend. It's that fab! You'll love it! Pinky swear!

goodbye, jack bauer

2012-11-19T15:37:00.002-06:00

Jack Bauer, I love you. I hate your clock. It makes me nervous and stresses me out a bit. But I keep watching because I love you, your guns and your ninja-like combat skills. I do not like all the stress that ensues during the hour, but I do enjoy the espionage, unpredictability and the general bad-assness of your role. I'm watching you right now, actually.

Watching as I type this. Thank you, Netflix.

Due to the high levels of palpable stress during each episode, multi-tasking has become my coping mechanism. Intermittently answering emails, adding to my boards on Pinterest, folding laundry, typing a blog post...doing whatever it takes to bring the level of high alert from a 10 to a 5. I'm looking at you, but I'm looking at other stuff too. I hope you can understand where I'm coming from, Jack. Multi-tasking keeps me from getting too freaked out while you choke people out, blow stuff up and save the United States. Again.

I am on Season 7 right now and I am planning to finish Season 8 before we chuck the deuce to 2012. Netflix, thank you again for making this all possible.

JB, I love you. I really do, so it's hard to say this... but you can't follow me into the new year. It's not possible. No, Jack, it's not an option. It's not you... and it's not me... It's your clock. That thing is super annoying.

forever friends

2012-11-15T15:09:00.000-06:00

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You know... the people who have always got your back

Will tell you the truth

Especially when/if no one else will

Walk through fire with you

Sing on the mountain top with you

Cheer for and celebrate you

Love you regardless and unconditionally

Laugh with you

Pray with you

Cry with you too

Forever friends are timeless. Sometimes it's people you've known forever. Sometimes it's people you've know for a year. You can belly laugh, share your hopes and sorrows, and really expose the depth of who you are. It is safe here. The currency is love and vulnerability, two things that never go out of style but just appreciate with time.

Do you have these sorta people in your life? I hope you do.

They're the people that you know you'll always be friends with. The friends you talk to every day, every other day, day after day. The friends you can go for months without talking to, but when you do talk, it's as if no time has passed. Forever friends... today I honor and celebrate you. You know who you are and I love you dearly. Each one of you... dearly love. You encourage and inspire me. Your fabulous friendship makes life doubly sweet.

XOXO

election day = all good

2012-11-06T16:11:00.000-06:00

Today is election day in the United States. I am grateful for the opportunity to vote. I value and appreciate democracy. I am grateful that all the political ads, accusations and general election campaigning foolywank has finally ceased. I am not ready for the whining that will be coming later on tonight from the peeps who are on the losing side. Rule #1 at our house is no whining, you see.

Four years ago, I remember hearing remarks from Republicans about Democrats viewing Obama as a savior, which makes me wonder now if Republicans are doing the same thing with Romney*.

Hearing the savior comparisons about Obama and seeing the same sort of thing happen with Romney has only solidified my view that Jesus, the love specialist who saves, heals, and changes hearts and lives, is the Savior. He always has been. He always will be. Man is not the answer to man's problems 'cause we would've figured it out by now, don't cha think?

I vote and pray for our leaders in this country (whether I like/agree with them or not) and I pray for people and leaders across the globe. (I got that idea straight from the bible.) Gossiping about our leaders, wishing they were dead, slandering and even hating them...

can't really find that anywhere in the B-I-B-L-E.

I remember being convicted to the core when I read if you hate your brother, you hate God. <---This is my constant reminder that there is no room for hate in my heart. None. Not for the President, the Priest or the Person who hurt me the most. I hope and pray that this election, the people of faith will vote, yes. But more importantly that the love and the loving nature of Christ will be seen in our hearts, lives and actions yesterday, today and in the days and weeks to come.

When people get so amped up about politics and all the tomfoolery that can go along with it, I find myself hoping and wishing that the Mayans were right and we can all chuck the deuce** to this world sometime in December 2012. I mean wouldn't that be funny and amazing if we all just peaced out this December? Merry Christmas!!!! (Happy Hanukkah!!!! Happy Kwanzaa!!!! Happy Holidays!!! Bah Humbug!!!! or whatever you say... and then) *poof* spontaneous evaporation

I hope you're laughing because I'm not serious... at least I don't think I am... hahaha

My entire point about voting is this: That we will vote our morals and consciousness while trusting and respecting the fact that other people will (and have the opportunity to) do the same. I hope and pray that our love would be long, our respect would be wide and all judgment would dissipate. After all, God is the judge, which is why I have faith-- a strong inner knowing or certainty-- that regardless of who is "running" the free world, I know and belong to He who truly runs the world. And we are all part of His greater and sovereign plan. So I vote, but I know that regardless of who wins this or any other election, I'm good. All good, actually.

*If that statement ticks you off, you might be guilty.

**throw up a peace sign, say "peace out" or "goodbye"

30 days of thanks

2012-11-01T11:32:00.000-05:00

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Day 1: sunshine + blue sky
Day 2: smoothies
Day 3: family (for me, family = relatives and friends) :)
Day 4: my hubster who loves me + supports me + likes me
Day 5: kindred spirits
Day 6: the opportunity to vote
Day 7: a long talk with a great friend
Day 8: our fun-loving, free-spirited kiddo
Day 9: music!!!
Day 10: good eats w-my peeps #crackerbarrel
Day 11: mi casa
Day 12: homemade cookies fresh out the oven
Day 13: divine appointments
Day 14: rest and recovery
Day 15: technology that keeps me in touch w-family & friends near & far
Day 16: charitable organizations
Day 17: Netflix
Day 18: snuggles
Day 19: seeing a friend accomplish a goal #priceless
Day 20: road trips!
Day 21: my brother, my sista-in-love and my nephew
Day 22: smoked brisket and mi madre
Day 23: bamboo, fudge & Aunt Sissy
Day 24: an unexpected meal on the house
Day 25: friendship
Day 26: hot tea
Day 27: handwritten notes via snail mail
Day 28: medicine
Day 29: an easy, delicious, not too dry or hard as a rock scone recipe!
Day 30: lovely neighbors

first my heart broke, then hummingbirds came

2012-09-17T13:08:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time I bought a hummingbird feeder. Although I have loved hummingbirds for a long long time, it never occurred to me to purchase a feeder because I figured we lived too close to the city. But one day I saw a feeder smack dab on a neighbor's front porch HALF FULL of nectar and that was all the encouragement I needed. So I planted a penstemon (attracts hummies), hung my feeder and faithfully tended to the nectar. But no hummies came. I remained diligent to the mission and prayed for hummingbirds to come because I really really really wanted to see one. None showed up, but I kept trying. I plodded on and even asked my husband and Neighbor's husband to pray for hummingbirds to come. Both were silent, gave me the side eye and slowly walked away. Whatever, haters! If I make it (the nectar), they will come, I thought. So I kept at it. I pressed on until about the year and a half/two year mark and when I *still* hadn't seen hummingbird the first, I was like done. And ticked. Off. I didn't get rid of the feeder because it was cute and vintage-y looking, so I allowed it to remain in the garden. I totally gave up on the hummies though. I was extremely disappointed and I truly stopped believing that they would EVER show.

Fast forward a year or so... feeder still in place, still empty as all get out... and I'm still reeling over the heartbreak of few successive rapid-fire punches that almost knocked the life out of me. I was having a rough day. A rough couple of days, weeks and months, actually. I was putting on a brave face and showing up to do my absolute best, but the truth is I felt heartbroken. Despite the way I was feeling, I kept showing up and when it was time to work (write), I went to my office to ~~sit~~ ~~stare out the window~~ write. AS SOON AS I ENTERED THE ROOM, I saw a blur of something dart near the upper right side of the window. I didn't think much of it, but I did look towards the movement and there was the cutest, smallest, most adorable hummingbird I'd ever seen. I was astonished. Silently awestruck, I watched this gorgeous creature dance at the feeder. Then I remember thinking, THERE'S NO NECTAR IN THERE. Of all days for a hummie to come and there ain't no nectar... Thankfully, this didn't seem to bother my beautiful friend one bit because the dancing continued and THEN he moved away from the feeder to the left side of the window and flapped and fluttered those beautiful wings directly facing me. It was as if he was looking me right in the eye. Time seemed to slow down and this felt like it went on for at least ten or twelve minutes. In reality, it was more like ten to twelve seconds, which is like fifteen years for sporadic hummies, right? Cutie Patootie flitted off, leaving the same direction he came, and I broke down and released the most guttural sobs.

As I was on my knees crying, my sobs gave way to gratitude because I knew the hummingbird was a wonderful omen. It was God's way of speaking to me because only He knows what hummingbirds mean to me. (I will not even attempt to convey their significance to you because words cannot express it.) My heart was wailing, releasing, celebrating and receiving... simultaneously. My omen was this: everything is gonna be alright. Even if I can't see when or how. Even if I momentarily lose my way or stop believing. Doesn't matter because He is building something that does not depend on how I feel at any given moment. And this builder NEVER fails. Just when I pulled myself together and thought the tender moment was over, Cutie Patootie came back (several times!) and even brought a friend. I cried on and off all day.

I wanted to end this post with something about Prince and how this is what it sounds like when doves cry because I was crying and birds are involved, but since we're dealing with hummingbirds and not doves, I will just say this: It is going to be ok, so don't stop believing. And even if you do, God will never give up on you or stop believing in you. #thatslove

The remarkably brilliant Brene Brown refers to this leg of the journey as a "~~breakdown~~ spiritual awakening." Quite frankly, I would have preferred to receive this lesson/these lessions via book or osmosis, even, but since that ain't the way it works, my advice to US is this: lean into the heartbreak, push through the heart wrenching pain or metaphorically give it the finger by showing up each day anyway because regardless of how you feel or what it looks like, what you do or do not do, there is a favorable blessing over your life and your sign will come. Rest assured that whatever you need... it will come.

♥ Sharita

imbalanced hope

2012-09-05T13:11:00.001-05:00

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Sometimes I have this. Imbalanced hope. I keep showing up with a smile even though that situation or individual has kicked me in the teeth seventeen times. All seventeen times that I have shown up. Kicked in the teeth... every time. Well, maybe it was only sixteen times, but either way, the ratio is unfavorable and at the very least, I should be showing up with a mouthguard and headgear.

What is funny about ~~abusers~~ teeth kickers is that they seem to get off on treating the people they love like crap. I have had the ~~honor~~ ~~privilege painful experience~~ ... I have been able to observe this ridiculousness first hand for almost fifteen years. *cue violin*

In a nutshell, it's painful to behold or experience and it sucks because the relationship is a one way highway to hell where you give and give and give and it's never ever ever reciprocated. There are moments that at first glance seem to be reciprocation, but once again, it's a swift, hard kick to the pearly whites. I don't know if these people/situations are psychotic, narcissistic or what exactly... and I'm done trying to figure it out really because it's their problem, not mine. And, I have mucho bien amigos. Mucho, mucho bien amigos who inspired me to write this post about the ways to be a fab friend. This past weekend, I got to live out the awesomeness of fab friends at a reunion of sorts via wedding with some of my college pals who are equal parts hilarious, loving, honest and utterly amazing. It was heaven on earth and I will share *some* of that soonish... But for now, back to the craycray peeps... Dealing with them is downright dastardly and devilish and I have the scars and dental bills to prove it. *violin solo ends*

So, in trying to find the healthy ground between showing up for a teeth kicking (again... hopefully not... this time could be different is how it usually goes in my head) or showing up dressed to play goalie for the hockey team (which makes me feel protected, but looks downright cray), I realized this: my hope was never supposed to be in the person/situation anyway. Duh.com. My hope is ~~supposed to be~~ in my higher power, the one who is greater than I, the Creator of this world, the universe... all that is seen and unseen. How did I forget that (again)? So as I take off the goalie uniform, I realize: my hope is and always will be imbalanced if it's resting on anything other than the divine, the spiritual or the miraculous. Anytime I hedge myself on anything else, I am instantly bolted into imbalance and who wants to feel dizzy and out of sorts all the time? Not me. Let's place our hope in the One who created the butterfly and the Milky Way, shall we? The One who holds the world in His hands so to speak. The One who keeps it all in check by managing (read: balancing) the tension and sorting out the proportions. Whenever I come to this realization, one of my favorite prayers comes to mind:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time, accepting hardship as a pathway to peace. Taking as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it. Trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to Your will, so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next. Amen.

There was a time when that prayer pissed me the hell off, but that was then and this is now. And now, that prayer and my belief in it are synonymous with one thing: balance.

XO Sharita

subconsciously ticked?

2012-08-13T17:21:00.001-05:00

So the other day I woke up subconsciously ticked. You know when you're pissed off internally, but you have yet to fully acknowledge or realize it? This is what I call being subconsciously ticked. You're slightly irritated, annoyed or heated but the reason why has yet to surface. I hope you catch my drift... but anyways, like I said, I woke up SubT and now as I reflect, this may or may not've had to do with any of the following:

It was hot. Way hot. Hottttttttttttt.com

Seriously. There were wildfires blazing outta control, the sky was shades of black, gray and burnt umber AND homes were being burnt to the ground. Literally. We were praying for rain. Still are.

Turns out editing a book is much more time consuming in real life than it is in my dreams.

I got rear-ended (again!) while stopped at a redlight. Boohiss.

I could add more things (I am an HSP... my neck and low back are hurting... what is it about soreness hitting the day--and subsequent days--after?) but I won't... even though I kinda just did hahaha

When I sat down to attend a wedding just days after aforementioned rear-ending, that is when I realized that I was SubT...

(You may not know this about me, but weddings are my favvvvv. I would get married every year (to the same man!) if I could. I simply adore weddings. The decorations, the covenant, a promise to love, honor, cherish and forsake all others, a new family forming, a new beginning... a gloriously extravagant display of Love. It makes my heart swoon every time.)

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...So as I witnessed holy matrimony, I released and let go of my SubT because once again I realized: Love Wins. It sounds romantically hopeless, I know, but it is the truth. Love always wins. Always. Wins. And weddings symbolize this eternal truth. As I sat in the lovely love-drenched atmosphere, SubT gave way to joy and gratitude. Stories and laughter filled the air as I engaged in heart felt conversation with friends who are like family. These joys ~~replaced~~ displaced SubT. Thankfully.

Then came an overabundance of even more smile-inducing memories:

geeking out at the coffee shop with my twinnnn

"stim cells" -- electronic stimulatory goodness for a sore back

dinner with precious peeps

holding a handsomely perfect six week old baby boy

G.I. Joe missions galore

manicures and pedicures

flip flops

yoga

family

friends

wedding cake

a sweet baby girl fast asleep in my arms

friends who watch your dog for you when you're out of town (even though you always forget to ask until the last minute)

a good book

cream and sugar with a little bit of coffee

road trips!

sincerely heartfelt conversation

and then just a few moments ago, this video:

No need to be subconsciously ticked, see?
"Let's look at the world a little differently"
because Love is super legit and it wins, yall.
Now. Later. Or in the End.

Love wins. XO Sharita

you are not alone

2012-07-11T11:40:00.003-05:00

Sometimes I pretend like I am all alone in this world. A stereotypically and instantly oprhaned Disney character left to make it through life on my own far away from home. I do not know why I do this. Maybe it is my creative-dramatic personality or just an independent-loner mentality. Maybe it's a little bit of both. Regardless, the lonely card is absolutely bogus, ridiculous untruth.

So today I think what if I stop telling myself that I am all alone in this world?

What if I start remembering all the instances of laughter, love and undeniable this-person-is-in-my-corner-ness that is there? Oh yes, it is there... if only we will acknowledge it.

For me lately, support has revealed itself in the following ways:

unwavering love, support and loyalty that is my hubster

connecting with a bestie (friends since high school) umpteen years later and through it all, the love grows deeper still

full-bodied conversation with a forever friend I met way back in college

belly laughs regarding foolywank performances, Wolverine, ice sculptures and the engraving of a machete

kindred spirits traveling cross country and back with a kitty cat to boot #goodtimes

friends forev

swimming and soaking up the sun on the 4th of July

keeping it real about struggles, transitions and life lessons

an encouraging comment or email that comes along right when I'm wondering if this blog thing even matters (You know who you are and I truly appreciate your heartfelt expressions. For reals, I do.)

witnessing a dream come true for my little one via Mam, Pap, Aunt Sissy and Kasey the Power Ranger

connecting over coffee and goodies that were microwaved too long... legs with milk spots #LOL

safety, protection, provision, guardian angels, a cousin-sister, snuggles, chasing lightning bugs, dancing and doing the daily work of being my best self.

All evidence of a lavish life full of love, encouragement and unwavering support. You have it too, you know. Yes, there is always a ~~handful of haters~~ ~~fringe minority~~ handful of haters who don't understand, but that's OK because:

1. I don't get them either lol!

2. What others think of me is none of my business, 'member?

3. Haters gonna hate, so let 'em hate while we live a life that's great (haha I rhymed! #rapperswag ... not really lol)

When I look around and see how many people I love, how many people love me and are in my corner, it makes my heart smile and then swell with love and gratitude. Today I hope that you will open your eyes to the caring connections, lavish love and steady support that you have in your life because it is there. Undeniably.