Have you ever tried to make a change and just could not motivate people to do things differently? Did you feel your inspirational message fell flat on the corporate doorstep? When you are trying to change your business, the term WIIFM should be at the top of your mind. WIIFM, or the What’s In It For Me, resonates with employees and encourages them to jump on board because of how the change will personally impact them. A vision of becoming a bigger, stronger, and more productive company is a great reason for executives to change, but what about everyone else?  Although these reasons are critical, they usually don’t rally the people doing the work. Change projects succeed when employees know and support how it’s going to affect them personally. So if you want people to change, you need to let them know how their lives and jobs will be better in the new environment.

WIIFMs impact every part of our lives. Ten days before my 40^th birthday, I was told I had skin cancer, a very curable cancer, but it was one of the biggest scares of my life. The funny thing is, I went into the dermatologist thinking a little Botox would be a good 40th birthday treat (oh the vanity!).  I knew turning 40 would be memorable, but spending my 40^th birthday recovering from Mohs surgery on pain medication was not exactly what I had in mind. The importance of a WIIFM was staring me in the face on a very personal level. Finally, after all the ads, magazine articles, and research studies telling me to wear sunscreen, I listened. I finally realized that as a triathlete who spends most of the summer swimming, biking, running, and hiking in the beautiful Colorado sun, and 7-8 hours each winter weekend skiing at 9,000 vertical feet, I needed to do something different and begin taking care of my skin. I needed to change. Sunscreen, hats, and big sunglasses are now part of my family’s morning regimen. No advertisement or research study made me change; it was the fear of getting skin cancer again and the desire to prevent my kids from ever having to face skin cancer in the future that made me change. That was my WIIFM.

Finding the WIIFM for your change may not be as dire as having a surgeon cut three inches of skin out of your forehead because you don’t apply sunscreen, but it has to be something that makes people stand up and take notice.  As you embark on change, whether in your organization or personally, speak to people’s hearts and minds to make change happen. Meaningful change that lasts makes the WIIFM personal.

Dr. Christina Schlachter, PhD, is the CEO and Managing Partner of She Leads and is the author of Leading Business Change for Dummies (Wiley, 2012).

I am not a feminist, but what message did this tell all the young girls and boys in the audience? I was sad to see that these children were learning a harsh lesson: the media sees a woman’s value and power in her sexuality and beauty – not in how wonderfully smart she is or what her capacity of leadership may be.  I could not help but think which little girl out there will remember Disney on Ice for years to come as she tries to look just like Barbie, focusing more on her make-up and every calorie than one day being president or a CEO? And what about all the black children out there that saw all the cute blonde girls in sexy clothes? Not one Barbie skater had dark skin. How sad.

As a woman leader, even with a successful business and wonderful family, every morning I look in the mirror and scrutinize a wrinkle or dimple, so I am just as guilty. I once calculated that the amount of time I spent from 13 to 23 worrying about my weight and looks was about 2 hours a day, or 7,300 hours. Over 300 days of my life, nearly an entire year, which could have been studying science or learning a foreign language, were spent in front of the mirror or on a scale.

For 2012, my leadership pledge is to help 12 young women lead with their hearts and minds and feel empowered to take on a leadership position in the community. If you have not seen Miss Representation yet, it is well worth the 2 hours. While women have made great strides, we can’t let up. Join me in making a pledge to help our future women leaders. Sign the Miss Representation pledge at http://missrepresentation.org/.  Stay tuned for more, as She Leads is signing up to take the corporate pledge in 2012.

Old Development Objective
Development Objective: Communication/Presentation.

New Action Focused Development Objective
Increase confidence [action verb] when presenting materials to large groups [object] by July 1, 2012.
Remember that you want to do something to something. Development is not a noun – it is an action!

Now it’s time to identify activities that will help you achieve the action verb-object combo. Here is a stab at some things you may want to improve:

Old Activity List
Training in communication

New Activity List
Offer to co-lead team meetings
Identify training and speaking opportunities to present at one a monthly basis
Join Toastmasters to gain experience, attend a meeting to try out the local group.

Much better than just logging into an e-class, right?
The icing on the cake will be to add in a timeline and measurement system. We’ll cover that next week. For now, get your thinking cap on, dust off last year’s professional development plan, and focus on the action verb-object combo.

Happy planning!

So what is the point? Whether you are leading teams in a Fortune 500 company or creating a business from scratch, do what you are really good at and let someone else do the rest. I love coaching my clients – love love love love it. But (much to their their pleasure I am sure), invoicing them, well, let’s just say QuickBooks was the best investment I ever made. When you do what you love and what you are good at, your body, mind, and heart feel like they are sailing on air.  When you spend time working on tasks you hate, you feel like the world is on your shoulders and kicking you at the same time.

While it may seem like too much of an investment to spend time getting others up to speed on how to do things, once they are there, your day is left wide open to spend on things you want to spend time on.  Clients often tell me that delegation and asking others to do something takes much more time than them doing it themselves.  My answer: maybe initially, but if someone is competent and committed they usually pick things up rather quickly. So the ball is now in your court – are you willing to give up control to gain the most valuable thing in the world (time if you did not guess!)?

If you have trouble thinking what you need to delegate, ask yourself these questions:

• Is it something that is part of the day to day routine? If so, this is a perfect delegation task. Yes, delegating gets it off your plate, but if you look at something as day-to-day, you may never see the opportunities to innovate. Someone on your team may have the best idea on how to streamline these processes if you give them control.

• Is it something that only happens once or twice a year? Delegate it to someone to manage and have them ask for your input.  These annual activities (think taxes or budgeting) definitely need your input but do not need your undivided attention. Having someone on your team or a virtual assistant pull together all the pieces and show you the big picture will allow you to focus on where you add value: giving the go ahead!

• Finally, is it something you do not know how to do but think you should be able to do? I really think I should be able to copyedit my work. I mean, I am educated and have written books – right? Wrong! It is hard to admit but with a mild case of dyslexia and a major case of my brain moving faster than my fingers, hiring a copyeditor and sucking up my pride was one of the best decisions I have ever made.

So go ahead and delegate and distribute the work so 2012 can shape up to be the year you focused on what you love the most.

Finally, when someone canceled their reservation in Estes Park earlier this week just as I was looking at the campsite reservation site, I figured it was the universe telling me to let go of this fear and see what happens. Yes, it rained when we were eating and since we forgot to bring rain gear (who checks the weather forecast?) we ended up running to the car and eating inside of our trusty Subaru Outback. At night I put on two fleece jackets, and if I stood any closer to the campfire I think my fleece would have combusted. And the first round of hamburgers burned since my focus was on the black storm cloud rushing towards us, rather than cooking. But you know what – the kids all slept through the night and woke up as happy as could be. They loved watching the elk roaming the fields, and spotting fish in the lake. We had a really great time.

What does this teach me about fear and leadership? Sometime our fears are rationale (did I mention it down poured rain?), but even reasonable fears should not stop me from doing something I love or really want to do. Yes, maybe a client will say no, or the second book will still not make it to the New York Times best seller list, but these fears still do not make it ok to not try. It makes me wonder what other fears I need to push through to open new doors and new experiences in life. Perhaps fear is just a politically correct way of saying “excuses”.  For me, it is time to stop making excuses and start opening doors, not standing there fearing what might be behind them.

What fear will you conquer this week?

As most of my brilliant clients and co-workers know (and my blog readers), so many lessons in leadership come from my sweat and tears on my amateur triathlon courses. This summer I had planned on having an amazing triathlon season – that was my North Star guiding my 5:30am swim workouts throughout the winter! My husband and I signed up for Ironman Canada to celebrate our 10^th anniversary of meeting at Ironman Lake Placid, but unfortunately injuries kept us from ramping up the training and I had to withdraw a month before the race. Because of this change of course, I signed up for a few races to keep my spirits high in bike/triathlon crazed Boulder for the rest of the summer. My pulled-out-of-nowhere racing season resulted in a 2^nd finish in the Outdoor Divas Triathlon, and wins at the Steamboat Olympic Triathlon and the Oktoberfest Sprint Triathlon this past weekend. Not bad for a big vision with a big change of plans!

I realize that my plans do work in the end, but not because I stay the course no matter what is thrown my way, but because I change my plans and my goals often, if not continuously. The one constant is that they are always aligned to my guiding North Star, my vision of my life. This is true in leadership, life, and business. Staying the course is admirable, but so is changing it when it makes sense. So many people tell me they cannot plan their career three years out because so much is going to change. Yes, it will, but the vision for the future – your future – should not be changing if it comes right from the heart. Your perfect plan may mean setting a crazy-wonderful vision of the future and going after it, but then changing course as needed to get there.

The Right Roles

If you want to reach out to your employees, answer their questions, and make sure everyone’s ideas are heard, recorded, and acted on, start by making sure the right people are in the room before the meeting gets started.

Facilitator / Leader

The role of the facilitator is to make sure everyone is involved. It is his/her job to apply cohesion to the issues being discussed, especially when there’s disagreement within the group. Make sure your facilitator is good with words, and has lots of experience in mediating table discussion. In all employee meetings, the CEO or senior leader can play the role of the facilitator if they have the support of a scribe and timekeeper and are open to listening to critical feedback. There is no better way to start employee engagement groups or suggestion programs than to let employees speak straight to the top!

Scribe

The scribe takes down notes and other important points discussed in the meeting. Without a scribe, you may not remember more than half of what was said in that meeting and even if you do, employees in the room will wonder if their comments went in one ear and out the other. Think of a scribe as your computer flash drive.  The scribe can also work with the leader’s executive team or administrative support to create notes from the meeting to use in the future.

Time-keeper

While the facilitator mediates, the time-keeper negotiates. The time-keeper keeps track of time and makes sure that the discussion moves along smoothly just in time for it to finish before the bell rings.

The Right Rules

Ground rules are great, and you can create a list a mile long for some meetings. But do yourself a favor and keep the list to 5 really important ones.

1)      Tell me who you are, but that is where the naming stops! Decide upfront if names need to be recorded alongside ideas. If there has been a good amount of employee engagement work done in the past, employees may be happy to assign their name to an idea or area. If you are just kicking off an employee suggestion or engagement program, it is best to keep names to those name tags until there is a level of trust that the information will not be used against them in the future.

2)      Usefully record information. Have the scribe take notes and write in the moment without asking for clarification unless the leader or facilitator wants it. Give the group time to reflect on the notes and then clarify if many people seem unsure of the content or continue to raise questions

3)      Neutral facilitation. If the facilitator is different from the leader, the facilitator serves the leader and group. If the facilitator is the leader of the team, they serve the group.

4)     Ask employees to speak for yourself and use “I” messages that impact the group, not just your life or job.  This means minimizing gossip, hearsay, and irrelevant stories.

5)      Have the leader agree and say what will happen after the meeting with the information – even if it is not clearly defined yet. Nothing is worse than an employee suggestion vacuum – so making sure everyone knows what will happen next is critical.  This is the leader’s responsibility.  Getting ideas is the easy part – doing something with them takes talent.

All employee meetings are all about ideas, recommendations, and suggestions being put on the table to solve problems and build a better future.  But without the right structure in place, things can get out of hand. There may be too much discussion on one particular subject or people may feel inhibited to speak. Good luck with the good ideas!

Note from Shasta: For Friendship Month this September I’ve invited some women to guest blog for me, adding their voices and experiences to our journey.  I’m honored to host this posting by Dr. Christina Schlachter (bio at the end).  I met her at a conference last February and while we don’t live near each other, we’ve become “business friends.” I hardly ever write on friendships at work so I’m glad she took that angle! And I hope you’ll all comment with things you’ve learned about work relationships!

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When we were little girls, we would make friends with the girls in our homeroom class, play hopscotch together during recess, and pass notes during science class when we thought the teacher was not looking.

As grown women, homerooms have been traded for conference rooms, playgrounds for a morning latte at the corner coffee shop, and we text friends the latest gossip from our computers as we sit in our cubicles at work. It is amazing how things have changed, yet really stayed the same.

For those who work in offices, we spend over 8 hours a day with our “colleague” friends, so it makes complete sense that we would want to get to know and perhaps become close friends with those around us at the water cooler. But what do you do when your friend (or you) becomes the boss?

Or even for those of who work from home or run our own companies, we still create a business network that can become friends, or need our friends to help us with our businesses.  When I started my own coaching and training firm four years ago, I was thrilled to share my excitement and good fortune with friends by using them as vendors, partners, and eventually as clients. The last thing I needed to do was to partner with someone I knew nothing about – I had too much on my plate already! I trusted my friends’ opinions when it came to any problem I was having in my personal life (men, kids, diet, and everything else!), so I assumed I could work with them just as easily.

I happily report that most of my “business friends” have remained intact and many of my clients are also good acquaintances. But I also am sad to say that some of my long time friendships have soured because our “friendship” was used as “wiggle room” when it came to paying bills, providing a quality service, or getting things done on time.

Here’s What I Have Learned About Friendship and Work

Alfred A. Montapert, author of The Supreme Philosophy of Man: The Laws of Life, is quoted as saying All lasting business is built on friendship, and while these may not be supreme philosophies, here are three lessons I have learned when I want to make my friendships and business grow together.

1. State the obvious – QUICKLY!  I have never wanted to hurt a friend’s feelings, especially when it came to telling them they just are not doing a good enough job. Most of my soured friendships in business could have been saved if I had spoken up a little earlier, and I shall take that lesson to my grave. When a friendship is stressed I realize now I need to face the new situation head on and fast. First things first: State the obvious and if things are not working out perfectly, I have learned to let my friends know I value their friendship, and while there is work to be done, I know we can work it out together.
2. Set clear objectives and timelines: Duh. Make that double duh. I would never have started a new relationship with a new contractor or vendor without having clear objectives, and I realized I was assuming my friends would just get the work done without the same courtesy I provided people I did not know. I was just as a guilty of using wiggle room with my friends’ objectives as my friends were on their end of the deal. While I have realized friendships will need a more “friendly” approach, I now kick off my new business relationship with clear objectives, timelines, and measurements. In a time of stress, there is nothing like clear objectives to keep everyone focused at the task at hand.
3.  Set time a side for friendship. Just friendship. One mistake I made when I enlisted friends to work with me in business was to assume it was perfectly fine to move our gossiping happy hours to power lunches discussing the next greatest service offering or marketing approach. We used to hang around the water cooler, take long lunches, and instant message about the horrible outfits people wear to work, and all those times abruptly ended. I realized that while I was the boss, I still needed to put a little extra effort into scheduling NO-WORK-TALK coffee, after hours drinks, or just down time to keep my friendship going. It does take a little more effort, but I now know my friendships are worth it.

It is true, the top of the corporate ladder can be lonely. But it does not need to be. You need a team of people to help you get to the top of the corporate ladder, and wouldn’t it be nice if your team was full of people who really liked you and called you friend?

Dr. Christina Schlachter (@DrChristinaS) runs She Leads, an American Express M31000 award winning company providing training and coaching that helps teams & leaders communicate better and achieve their goals.  She lives in Boulder, Colorado with her husband and two sons.  Her book, The Change Plan: Your Guide to Transforming Your Career and Life in 12 Weeks will hit the shelves later this year.

By no means can I compare baking for a holiday to such tragic events, but with my leadership coach hat on I paused to consider how different the same words or actions can mean to different people. It is easy to assume when someone is in a rush or abrupt with me, that they must either be mad at me or think I am not worth their time. But perhaps it is just because they have had a bad day or a million other things are on their plate. In speaking with one of my coaches this morning, she mentioned that her non-exempt (hourly) employees don’t really care about personal or professional development. When I asked her why she said that, her response: they have been here 15 years and just want their paycheck. I challenged her to take a minute and ask them what they want to get out of their 8 hours in the office, rather than just assuming what they want.  Sometimes asking for the meaning of individuals’ messages and actions will surprise you.

I spend a good amount of time analyzing and recommending actions for leaders to follow as they grow in their current and future roles, but the best advice I can give, and take myself, is to make sure I understand where the other person is coming from and never assume anyone has the same perspective as I do. The good news, finding out what other people want is usually as easy as asking them.

Happy Ethiopian New Year and all my thoughts and prayer to the families who lost loved ones on September 11, 2001.

As a motivational speaker, I believe everyone needs to be the best at something, no matter how small, silly, or seemingly insignificant that something may seem to everyone else. If nothing else, it ignites your spirit. This weekend I got to experience that small, silly, and seemingly insignificant win. I won the Steamboat Olympic Triathlon. We were not on television and it was not an Olympic/Ironman/Anything-else qualifier. The two days before the race thousands and thousands of spectators were watching the US ProCycling Challenge in Steamboat, Colorado; our race had about 600 spectators (about 2 for each athlete). It was just a race; but it was a race I planned for, worked hard towards, and push myself for every step of the way. I researched training plans, spoke with coaches for their advice, and this time I won my age group beating out over 120 other women (and over 100 men!). But it was not beating other people that really mattered. It was knowing that I set my eyes on a goal and did everything in my power to make it happen.

Leaders in companies, organizations, and in life, know that winning is not the only thing out there, but it feels good to have that validation once in a while. It raises your confidence, makes you smile, and provides a sense of accomplishment after a long journey. Nothing raises a team’s spirit more than winning. But winning does not just happen. It takes time and it takes effort. As a leadership coach, my first question to most of my clients is: where do you want to be in 3 years? What job do you have and what have you accomplished? If the answer is “I don’t know” or “I don’t have time to think about that”, how can you expect anything to happen differently? If you want to accomplish something the first step is visioning yourself there. The one question to start this process is this: Pretend that you are about to retire, what would you have needed to do/see/experience in order to consider your career a truly great one with no regrets? The second question is: what do you need to do differently to get you there?

In my profession (a motivational speaker and leadership coach) it is hard to admit this but it is true: life sometimes sucks. Kids/husbands snoring/dogs/hurricanes may wake you up at 2am before a big meeting, you may not get the client to sign a contract after working on it for endless days and nights, and you may be on the receiving end of people just being mean. That is why we all need to win something to remind ourselves that while there are challenges in life and work, sometimes things do work out just right. If you can vision yourself winning, make a plan, work hard with laser like focus, and have a little bit of luck, you will be number one in what you want to do.

Good luck!