But only the truly oblivious don’t wonder how wise is putting it out there.

Those hairy fat perverts pretending a sweet young thing from whose wicked family she must escape, if only an air fare might deposit in her account.

Back then, in this wonderful provincial township, the staid old broadsheet found personals classifieds in this modern era still too indelicate for their traditional readers, though it eyed them enviously as that damned Interwebs was really, really starting to eat advertising revenue.

Across town in the offices of The Star – an advert-jammed tabloid giveaway – no such qualms paused the keyboards. It devoted every available column inch to persons seeking companionship, whatever the degeneration. “Horny creep with no moral boundary seeks female debauchee.” Ka-ching!

So it was that Throsby thought to commit his lonesomeness to a “personals classified,” his honest shingle swinging amid myriad swingers of apparent sexual abandon. But to compose a tempting promotional was a cruel lesson in self appraisal. And after reading all that follows below, those promiscuous word salads soiled his innocence and he gave up. The mission then was to find someone on the other side who had deftly leapt that hurdle.

He read perhaps hundreds of pleading messages constrained only by cost per letter and vocabulary – not, apparently, by inhibition or imagination. They the hopeful had also been reading and absorbing and composing in a feedback loop whereby phrase after glorious phrase morphed into fabulous, hilarious cliche.

Here are some.

Your irrepressible reaction follows …in italics.

• Attractive bubbly 45yo lady, looks and feels much younger..
  … you can’t easily tell a person’s age by feeling them
• Single man, 40, fit, intelligent, searching for a slim, witty babe for adventure, travel, 4WD. I’m still stuck in the 80’s . Ph. me you retro chicky babe before I get old and boring
  … yeah, get him while he’s young and boring
• Terrific 68yo. Taurean lady, well spoken .. Seeks man of integrity, kind, caring, funny, outgoing, loyal, who will be kind to my Maltese pooch.
  … silly me. I thought you wanted a ROMANTIC PARTNER
• Attractive 36yo lady … Looking for a man born in 1959 or 1971
  … umm, I was born in both of those years. Can I come over now?
• 32yo lady .. seeks man 6’2″, NS, ND, solid build, dark hair and eyes and a kind heart.. I know you’re out there somewhere.
  … Noone called? Try metric, that’ll be 187.9599999999999 cm
• Two ladies, friendly, genuine, caring with GSOH seeking 2 males 45-55 who enjoy fishing, BBQs, …
  … and yes, we still go to ladies room together
• 29yo mother likes horses, bands, outings, seeking .. must be a gentleman and secured.
  … handcuffed OK, prefer leg-irons
• Hi if you’re 50-62yo male looking for a lady 55 NS SD likes dancing BBQs music movies dining in or out, please give me a ring
  … or a car, or a house
• Bi couple looking for Bi couple interested in 4x4WD, beach, fishing…
  … and 2x2on2
• So many phonies, who is out there who is real? An intelligent, exquisitely beautiful lady of genuinely loving action and faith in God seeks a gentle kindhearted loyal for life, sincere, attractive, well-educated Christian man who can value the sincerity of my heart above all earthly things
  … He’s the messiah. I ought to know, I’ve followed a few.
  
• Piscean seeking soul mate, 50’s, SS SD fit young at heart. I love animals, boats, fishing, …
  … Hi, I’m Nemo!
• 40yo easy going gent NS, ND, into horses (Thoroughbreds). Looking for lady 30-40 years with genuine interest in horses
  … if it doesn’t work out, there’s always the horses
• Single lady seeking permanent partner romantic passionate loving sincere honest spontaneous GSOH, a good kisser who can steam up the car windows, NS 48-58 around 5’10”, no body odor.
  … dang, got me with the body odor!
• Where are you Prince Charming? I want to spend candlelit dinners at home with you, romantic nights out, weekends away. I can light up your life …
  … with candles?
• A caring, educated, early 60s gentleman wishes to meet 50-60yo elegantly slim 10-12 lady with no ties and time to experience a variety of new and existing common interests as a friend and companion that may lead to a romantic relationship.
  … or may not. Next!
• Good 40yo man wanting to find the love of his life, NS SD GSOH, a thin, pretty lady, between 30-40, singly loved woman, no divorcees or separated ladies, no children
  … err, this IS the REAL world, yes?
• Olivia, Filipino lady, could you please call Ron
  … again, louder!
• 40yo 6′ active intelligent modern guy GSOH morals and values, seeks intelligent reasonably slim, reasonably attractive lady, friendship view relationship
  … unreasonably fat & unattractive don’t call
• A lady of 47 going onto 48 …
  … as most 47 year olds are
• Lonely young man seeks a lonely mature lady 37-52 passionate, sensual, cute, smart, naughty and nice. Wants a toyboy.
  … mum, stop, I know it’s you
• Attractive lady seeking guy with GSOH, NS, enjoys dancing, dining out, movies, well-groomed, romantic, loyal, must love animals for a permanent relationship if compatible.
  … compatible with your pets?
• Australian gent, Arackney, 71 years, would pass for 61 or 62, carry’s age very well …
  … honest, could be mistaken for 55 in total darkness
• Older man seeks an educated single Chinese or Japanese lady preferred English not important.
  … Language, I assume.
  
• DTE fun-loving male 40yo WLTM attractive slim lady for friendship, outings, conversation. No big girls please. …
  … I’ll find out where the bastard lives and let you big girls know
• Fantasy man 35yo genuine, discreet, masculine, model looks, wishing to meet lonely attractive women.
  … and give them pleasure for money
• Swedish man 29, 6’3 fit and blonde, NS, SD, very GSOH, intelligent, creative and gifted in the arts ….
  … yeah, and I’m Tom Cruise
• Sixty-one yo looking for average Joe 60-70 yrs with no hang ups …
  … but can still get it up
• Bitter twisted & disillusioned at 32, unattractive ungrateful wench seeks 30-40yo man to be disloyal and dishonest with.
  … I’ll … get back to you
• Interesting loving active retired lady …. … to enjoy quality times and mutually interesting activities together.
  … interesting yes. But romantic?
• Widow mid 70’s nice personality, with principles would like to meet educated man
  … doh! I only made it to vice-principles
• Woman 45yo slim attractive … seeking 35-40yo man …with a GSOH, extremely clean (house clean). My children are grown up and looking for a man with the same for good time and a great relationship. Genuine people only need apply
  … Huh? Am I dating you or your children – or both?? By the way, just how many kids are there? (so many questions)
• Ardent tall slim actor & p/t teacher. Young virile handsome romantic 50 NS caring cultured loyal sensitive new age. Old fashion values & virtues. Simple tastes, pleasures. U: DTE Similar: Sensuous Sim/med 45-65 no ties Arts/craft: non-material. Ready: Co/Habit; Grow; Hear Mind Body SOuld Mutual Creative Perm. Positive LTC Mates. Pref CC P/sula.
  … Oh Hi! My name is .. .. arr forget it!
• Pisces lady 59 looking for an honest sincere, caring, down to earth man, looks don’t matter. I’m 98kgs but losing it …
  … Honey, we’re all losing it!
• Mum 38yo medium/cuddly size wishes to meet gen. guy on farm …
  … find me in the pig pen
• Easy going fit guy NS ND intelligent GSOH mid-40s seeking a slender, affectionate, calm and relaxed lady for permanent relationship
  … must have own Valium
• Silver touches my temple yet I have a heart of gold … seeking a true, loving partner.
  … my body is bronzed, muscles of iron, steely willed, feet of lead, my dome approaching chrome, mercurial of temperament, tinny on dates, galvanized into action, copper by profession .. oh, and I live in the rust belt. Zincing of you … shall we meet in the brasserie?
• Cuddly employed 25yo living on peninsula into music, nights out and good time…
  … most peninsulas are into water
• Feminine lady 54 slim DTE caring honest … WLTM genuine male to share life 50-59 view relationship. No mobiles.
  … aww, can’t I just keep it turned off?
• Hi, 40yo male new to area likes footy nights at home …
  … yo, home boy. We don’ do footy nights ‘roun dis hood
• Male 37yo 6′, big fella requires soulmate companionship, n/s, s/d, enjoys 4WD, quiet nights in out going to movies, travelling, etc.
  … and be sure to bring the “big fella” gift-wrapped
• Male 24yo no strings attached, quite, loyal … like to meet lady, age open, genuine, slim, no strings attached.
  … OK, we’ve clarified the “no strings” policy, now about that blind, forgiving love
• 27yo wheeling, NS, GSOH …like to meet fit girl with GSOH 24-30yo
  … wheeling? I’m missing something here
• 32yo solid build gentleman seeking lady .. must like bbq’s, picnics, must be affectionate, must have good personality
  … you vill comply? Jawohl Herr Kapitan
• 40yo sole parent .. not into pubs, clubs or church but believe in God. I love ethics, animals, kids & wilderness. Seeking soulmate of similar makeup
  … ethics? I love ethics – oh, I meant ethicals. Is that close?
• Grandfather, 77, widower, seeking convivial campany (male and female) on drives to various places, ferry trips, galleries,…
  … “campany” – very rad, gramps!
• Good looking educated ambitious Asian girl looking for someone special. Must be employed …
  … part of me say ‘Yes!’, part say ‘Run away!’
• Hi I am 59yo blonde hair brown eyes 5’4″ tall NS SD I like walking, dining out, going to the movies. If you would like to get in contact p lease give me a call.
  …. seeking blonde eyes, brown hair
• Seeking a rural man around 50. I have blue eyes brown hair, slender, stylish, gentle, articulate, inquisitive and loyal, cares for ecology, enjoys animals, horse riding, biology, computers, reading, cultural events, dining, dancing, financially secure, would like to hear from similar rural NS male.
  … oops, wrong planet
• Christian 47yo looking for a Christian partner who loves church and his Lord. Take me as I am to enjoy the good times together
  … yo! Ready for a born-again sinner!
• Caring man 49 GSOH SD SS medium build no ties enjoys films sport beach nights out seeks lady to early 60s with no ties for friendship possible relationship
  … so, neither of us should wear a tie?
• Caring 27yo looking for a lady to spend my life…
  … but not my money
• Free to good home 31yo active male, affectionate and loyal, big brown eyes and coat, not desexed, house trained, known to bite. Enjoys days out. Seeks friendly pussy cat for friendship or relationship
  … promise not to lick balls on first date
• Financial business man. I am generous, kindhearted and loving gentleman. Seeking same, slim 18-25 for relationship, free accommodation.
  … for me, that is
• … and you are between 40-48 give us a call. Myself, 48yo, tall, blue eyes, easy going.
  … Hello, err .. is “Myself” there – um .. could I speak to “Myself”?
• New to area, 6′ brown hair, … looking for TLC, age open, looks aren’t major so long as you have GSOH, shy ladies apply
  … wo! Careful! Really should add that time-proven filter “slim, attractive”?
• Racehorse, 38, putting himself out to stud Looking for greener pastures. No weeds or thistles, Fine looking stallion in search of good looking mare..
  … join me and live the metaphor
• Respectable tall mid-60s gent, div. no ties, non alcoholic or gambler, no tattoo, retired, fin. sec. Good appear. Active, likes garden, dancing, bicycle, current events, trips, humor, affection, garlic prawns, calamari & more…
  … way too much information
• Hi, I am 21yo with nice blue eyes. I love boats, fishing, travelling, walking along the beachfront at nights and staying weekends away. Looking for lady 18-21 years.
  … to carry the fishing nets, no doubt
• 52yo male seeks lady to same age. GSOH, NS, SD, Easygoing type, view to becoming the King and Queen of eBay.
  … Sex to the highest bidder
• Single 18yo seeking attractive, intelligent, affectionate, romantic, loving. WLTM 26yo man. I would love to meet you asap. See you soon I hope.
  … smokin!!

Glossary ~ Personals Acronyms Explained

Not only the acronyms need explaining, but those strange coded words and phrases.

So you are new to this. What exactly is that (strange mysterious) person saying in their advertisement? After all, you don’t want to make a fool of yourself – at least not immediately.

Ladies, when men specify “slim attractive lady”, you should be very wary. A man who wants ‘slim attractive’ has done YOU a favor – skip him! He wants a dream, not a person.

Men, don’t say that!! There isn’t a woman on Earth who believes she IS “slim and attractive” and yet doesn’t desperately wish to be. Examine your motives for even thinking that.

5’4, 6’1″, etc – height in feet+inches [multiply feet by 12 for inches, total inches by 2.5 for centimeters, then divide by 100 for meters]
BBQ – barbecue (shrimps are NOT barbequed in Australia; only the cheapest, toughest cuts of beef steak and totally-inedible, indigestible sausages)
Caring – not wife beater, at least
Christian – code for non-Moslem
Cuddly – 150% overweight or greater
Dancing – breaking him in
Dining out – wild sex
DTE – Down to Earth (and if you are lucky, not an alien)
Div – Divorced (so they say)
Financially secure – you that is, because I’m out of work
For friendship – wild sex
GSOH – Good sense of humor
Guy – gay with Australian accent
Lady – female with shameful past
Lesbian – east Mediterranean
Medium size – cuddly, by the time we meet
Must be employed – you, as I said, because I’m out of work
Mutually interesting – the best hoped for by two boring people
New age – just had birthday
ND – non-drinker
NS – non smoker
Nice personality – known to speak
Possible relationship – wild sex
Quality time – wild sex
Quiet nights at home – wild sex
Refined lady – slut alert
Rural man/woman – stubble jumper; expects you to have a horse, or at the very least transport for theirs
SD – social drinker
SS – social smoker
Sensitive – apologises while beating you
Size – Needs a webpage of its own! Varies by country, so take care. Assume dress size – few ladies boast their breast parameters.
Slim – only 20-50% overweight – or, just started to diet
Thin – haven’t eaten today
Walks on the beach – wild sex
WLTM – would like to meet
WLM – would like meat
yo – years old (or I’m from the hood, homey)

The post Man Seeks Man for Spanking appeared first on SheepOverboard.

The Monash Centre for Financial Studies has ranked the modern slavery statements of the 100 largest listed companies on the Australian Stock Exchange (ASX).

Several major companies – IDP Education, Fisher and Paykel Healthcare, Cleanaway, Resmed and Nine Entertainment – performed poorly on the modern slavery score.

The findings were based on statements available from S&P/ASX100 companies (ASX 100) from the last financial year, ending June 2021, and identified that there was a wide variation in the information disclosed relating to the modern slavery statements submitted by each of the ASX100 companies.

This is the first time ASX 100 companies have been required to report on modern slavery risk in their supply chains.

Of the ASX 100 companies examined, the most common modern slavery risks assessed and mentioned was forced labour, child labour and debt bondage.

Modern slavery currently impacts 40.3 million victims globally and $354 billion at-risk products imported by G20 countries. The problem is also prevalent within Australia, with approximately 1,567 incidents nationally.

The Commonwealth Modern Slavery Act (2018) commenced operation on 1 January 2019 and requires entities based, or operating, in Australia, with an annual consolidated revenue of more than A$100 million, to report on the risks of modern slavery in their operations and supply chains and actions.

The team of researchers from the Monash Centre for Financial Studies, in the Monash Business School, included Dr Nga Pham, Dr Bei Cui and Dr Ummul Ruthbah.

Lead researcher, Dr Nga Pham says the findings identified that large companies with large employee numbers and big supply spends scored well overall on modern slavery discourse quality.

Of the top companies we identified with the best scores, these companies had made managing modern slavery risks a priority.

This meant that they were transparent in how they assess and address the risk of modern slavery practices in their operations and supply chains and monitor such actions against the mandatory criteria outlined by the Commonwealth Modern Slavery Act,” said Dr Pham.

It’s important to note that this is the first year that ASX companies have had to report on modern slavery and based on our findings we expect that majority of these companies will take action and improve their disclosure quality in the next financial year.”

The findings also identified that good modern slavery statements showed a history of continued effort in managing modern slavery and other human rights issues.

The report also outlined key recommendations for companies, investors and regulators.

We’ve presented these findings in a way which allows investors to identify priorities in engaging with their portfolio of companies in a transparent and open manner. This means that investors can communicate the possible areas of concern and modern slavery risks relevant to each company or each sector.

They can help companies to enhance their due diligence and remediation processes, while also ensuring the board has oversight of modern slavery and human rights risks,” said Dr Pham.

For companies looking to improve their management of modern slavery risks, it was recommended that their exposure to modern slavery risks in the supply chains should be assessed based on the demographics of their suppliers, the economic size of their supply spend and the nature of their transactions with each supplier.

Companies were also encouraged to strengthen their existing due diligence and remediation process, while also engaging and educating their suppliers in order to mitigate future risks within their supply chain.

See the complete report at: Monash University

The post Identifying Modern Slavery appeared first on SheepOverboard.

A new way of measuring ocean temperatures helps scientists determine likely scenarios of global warming.

We’ve heard that rising temperatures will lead to rising sea levels, but what many may not realise is that most of the increase in energy in the climate system is occurring in the ocean.

Now a study from UNSW Sydney and CSIRO researchers has shown that a relatively new ocean temperature measuring program – the Argo system of profiling floats – can help tell us which climate modelling for the 21st century we should be paying attention to the most.

Professor John Church from UNSW’s Climate Change Research Centre in the School of Biological, Earth and Environmental Sciences says the study published today in Nature Climate Change is an attempt to narrow the projected range of future ocean temperature rises to the end of the 21st century using model simulations that are most consistent with the Argo’s findings in the years 2005 to 2019.

The models that projected very high absorption of heat by the ocean by 2100 also have unrealistically high ocean absorption over the Argo period of measurement,” Prof. Church said.

Likewise, there are models with lower heat absorption in the future that also don’t correspond to the Argo data. So we have effectively used the Argo observations to say, ‘which of these models best agree with the observations and therefore constrain projections for the future?’”

Named after the boat which Greek mythological hero Jason travelled on in search of the golden fleece, the Argo floats are loaded with high-tech equipment that measures ocean temperatures to depths of up to 2000 metres.

Each Argo float sends measurements to satellites which then beams the results to analysis centres around the world. There are more than 3500 floats dispersed around the globe, with the bulk of them managed by the US (more than 2000) while Australia accounts for the next highest number of floats, numbering 317.

Prof. Church says the Argo floats offer a new level of accuracy in temperature measurement. Not only are the high-tech instruments more reliable than in the past, but the coverage of the planet’s oceans is so much more thorough.

Previously we depended on research ships making very high accuracy measurements, but only in very restricted areas. Or we would get merchant ships to drop expendable instruments into the water which gave better coverage, but with much less accurate instruments.

Using these approaches, there were much larger gaps in the Southern Ocean because these waters were less trafficked.”

The ubiquity of the Argo floats offers unprecedented real-time monitoring of ocean temperatures that will help oceanographers and climate scientists constrain their climate projections based on this higher resolution and accuracy of data.

The full story

One of the takeaways from the team’s analysis of the Argo data is that land and air temperatures only tell part of the story about the planet’s overall heat absorption. Prof. Church says the apparent stability of temperatures in the early 21st century did not correspond with the Argo’s recording of sea temperatures in the same period.

More than 90 per cent of the energy trapped by greenhouse gases is stored in the ocean and only about 1 per cent in the warming atmosphere,” he said.

In the first decade of this century, average surface temperature didn’t increase that much. And it created a lot of room for climate sceptics to say ‘what climate change?’. But throughout that period, oceans continued to take up heat – and this is where the 90 per cent of the energy in the ocean versus the 1 per cent in the atmosphere becomes critically important in the total climate system.

The climate system was still increasing its overall heat content over this period.”

Climate forecasts

It turns out that the projections of rising air and sea temperatures by some models in a recent set of modelling in the Coupled Model Intercomparison Project are warming too rapidly.

The models in CMIP5, which was completed from 2010 to 2014, fits in with the Argo observations more closely than CMIP6, which was only recently completed.

Some of the 28 CMIP6 models we used were more sensitive to greenhouse gases for their projections,” Prof. Church said.

Projections of climate change to the end of the century all take into account the effects of greenhouse gas emissions which are already responsible for much of the increased temperatures we’ve seen in the 20th and early 21st centuries.

Even if we take strong steps now to limit emissions to the upper bound of the Paris Agreement target of 2oC global surface warming, ocean temperatures are still projected to rise five to nine times the observed warming by 2081-2100, with 8 to 14cm rise in sea levels from the expansion of warmed ocean waters alone.”

With no concerted efforts to rein in emissions, oceans are set to warm by 11 to 15 times the warming observed by Argo in 2005-2019, with sea levels projected to rise 17 to 26 cm from the expansion of warmed ocean waters alone, and further rises from the addition of water to the ocean from glaciers and ice sheets.

Prof. Church says the Argo data has given scientists much more solid figures to work with when making projections about warming. In fact, the likely range of the constrained projections using the Argo data is 17 per cent narrower than the IPCC’s Sixth Assessment Report.

While a longer Argo observational period will allow us to further tighten the range of projected ocean warming and sea level rise, the Argo observations and the climate model projections already highlight the need to urgently and very significantly mitigate our greenhouse gas emissions if we are to avoid dangerous impacts of ocean warming and sea level rise.”

The post Ocean Temperatures Key to Climate appeared first on SheepOverboard.

After eight years of Australian conservative prime ministers dashing about the world stage and pointing to themselves, spelling and respelling their names to reporters from The Times, etc., suddenly all international eyes were on Scott Morrison.

A nation that, as of this week, China officially termed a “running dog” was now, much to its relief, no longer just a dog running around looking for an owner.

Scotty’s irrepressible smirk extended ear to ear as his skin rapidly tanned by irradiance from the two big dogs, Boris and Joe. They were, he announced in the announcement to beat all previous announcements, going to give him, Scott Morrison, the key to the wine cabinet. The nuclear wine cabinet.

While several thousand global defence analysts plumbed the disturbing dissonance – that a non-nuclear power thought it could build, operate, maintain, let alone afford, nuclear submarines – the Australian government waxed enthusiastic in the pages of its official news agency, Newscorp.

Yes, at last, the Australian Navy’s submarine quandary was settled. Its first US or UK or Australian nuclear-powered underwater boat would launch in a mere 20 years hence – about the same time the defence budget would, too, be underwater – and just in time to join America in its war with China. At which thought it probably dawned on the jingoes polishing government benches in Canberra that the next seven or so Liberal Nationals governments might have to tone down their war rhetoric in case it worked too well and brought on the exciting conflict say, a decade or so before the first sub hit salt.

China feigned outrage, indignation even, while quietly sniggering about the military gnat down under that had notionally swapped its white ensign for the stars and stripes. It drew up plans to economically scrape the gum off the bottom of its shoe. Chinese state media (apparently they have an equivalent of Murdoch’s Newscorp) said TuAo was now an adversary of China and should prepare for the worst – unaware, apparently, that almost nine years of #LNP government had inured the backward, coarsely-spoken villagers so comprehensively that nothing much could worsen their misery.

Chinese Foreign Ministry “splokesman” Zhao Lijian confirmed Defence Minister Peter Dutton’s fear of an imminent war with a thinly disguised metaphor about the US and UK, saying they should “abandon their outdated Cold War mentality, otherwise they will only shoot themselves in the foot.” Some say Mr Dutton suspects that is how China might remove the gum off the bottom of its shoe.

They also think Mr Dutton is unnerved by talk that China might kill the chicken to scare the monkey, and has asked analysts to confirm whether Australia is the chicken or the monkey, if not both.

While Chinese rhetoric redeployed its decades-old “running dog” towards Australia (Australians prefer the more benign and less active “lap dog”) it has restrained its use of the celebrated favourite from the (actual) Cold War, when it incessantly called the United States a “paper tiger.” Apparently, an Asian studies specialist told Throsby, that phrase confuses young Chinese, who think it’s a reference to Metro Goldwyn Mayer.

Christopher Hughes, a professor of international relations at the London School of Economics and Political Science, said China should be careful how its narrative plays to the home audience.

If they are wise, they will realize that this alignment is the result of their own assertiveness and change tack,” he said. “[China] does not have a lot of cards to play.”

Throsby notes, however, China does have a shitload of GO moves.

The post On the Beach Redux appeared first on SheepOverboard.

It’s hard to pick when a line is for effect, or is how a real life goes down in that realm.

Either way, for us plebs it’s a feast of revelation – even as the faux pas pass stratospherically by. What would we know?

But when gentle altruist Bob Axelrod gave that blazing speech to his miscreant son’s student body, the hair on my neck bristled. Twice.

First, at such an inspirational epitome of why greed is good. Then with contempt at its sociopathic thrust.

… the goddamn truth about Darwin, scarcity and the world you actually live in. It’s not the warm, swaddled place your Headmaster and your parents have told you about. It’s populated by people like me who will tear you apart.

All too true.

Nature didn’t select me. I selected myself by harnessing my nature.

Axe is saying he overrode nature’s Darwinian inexorability – because he’s a human, not an animal. He has choice. Free will.

But then denies it, describing himself as no more than a force of nature – a mindless predatory animal.

… the school’s code… asked [my son] to go against the DNA which is telling each of you to be greedy, yes, be hungry. Subjugate and conquer. Because that’s who we are. That’s what we are.

So which is it, Bobby?

We who live in comfort and security – you know, the beneficiaries of “western civilisation” still, centuries later, profiting at the expense of our former colonial subjects – have many luxuries for which guilt is the only appropriate emotion. Unless you’re an animal.

A guilty luxury I treasure is armchair pontification about the world’s woes while the other half of it suffers them. Was it ever thus, why is God cruel, where are we going, why are we here, is it really 42… is capitalism the best economic system?

Capitalism harnesses that better than any other economic model on Earth. Everything we have is because of capitalism,” said Axe.

Because someone had an incentive to get up off his ass, to out-invent, to out-earn, yes, and to subjugate others less capable, less intelligent, less ambitious, less lucky – to make those capitalistic dreams come true.

All too true and apparently quite noble – if your vantage is the apex and you’re at ease reclining on a mountain of suffering.

Except for two misconceptions.

First, “everything we have” is, despite growing ridicule of the concept, due completely and only to trickle-down, and not because the system worked to the advantage of all.

Because when your boss, the warlord Attila, and his band of pillaging thugs raided the village next door, you inadvertently got what little he, his Praetorian, and their families in the big tent had left over after gorging themselves on the spoils. Sure, you can better yourself by inventing, making and selling sharper spears, but you’re still gutter trash to Attila, who’ll probably steal the idea because he’s more powerful and almost certainly a lot smarter.

Demand-driven supply. Really? Marketing 101, propaganda, retail chains, and the junk food industry demolish that fable.

Second…

It implies capitalism is an economic system, the mother lode of civilisation, the path to prosperity for all, and the most efficient way to harness human effort. But “capitalism” is no such thing and certainly none of those.

Capitalism, a word that dictionaries struggle to explain by variations on the theme: “An economic system in which the production and distribution of goods depend on invested private capital and profit-making.”

What they dare not say is that capitalism is the harsh transactional interaction of living systems. People didn’t invent capitalism, nature deployed it.

Bobby Axelrod isn’t the arch capitalist, he’s a delusional predator that revels in barbarity. His vaunted “economic system” is nothing more than predatoriness dressed up as sophisticated idolatry that rates the worth of people by how big an arsehole they are, and how many losers they screwed to become that rich arsehole.

Capitalists aren’t humans, they’re merely the most depraved predators of the animal kingdom – because they know their actions benefit them at another’s cost but are proud of that injustice. They’re barely separable from psychopaths, who dress in finery, eat in exclusive restaurants, send their offspring to elite colleges, and deal in murder, slavery, and misery to sustain themselves.

Young Paul Atreides had to prove he was a human and not an animal by overcoming reflexive instinct to leave his hand in a box of pain.

Bobby Axelrod can only prove his humanity by enduring the pain of sharing and equality, by caring for those less fortunate.

Can he subdue his smug superiority to concede that socialism is the human face of political economics and his capitalism is but the law of the jungle overlaid with a malign cruelty?

The post Axing Axe’s Axiom appeared first on SheepOverboard.

Mater and Pater were discussing a great great grandfather (humans are so short-lived) which, at last, answers one of my perennial puzzles – right there on the unstained tablecloth.

Mater’s iPad displayed a faded print lost in time among the family collection, of – you guessed it – me, perched beside a quaint Turkish samovar.

There she was, a long-missed acquaintance and precious friend whom I lovingly recall was jocosely named Damla (“Drop of water”).

The conversation during this morning’s tea revealed that we were separated when that venerable old family disintegrated and the valuables were scattered to rather uncaring descendants. An email had arrived from a cousin of Mater asking if she wanted “the silly old urn” because it might be a family heirloom and the cousin wanted to be sure before leaving the odd piece on Vinnies’ doorstep.

Mater and Pater were delighted. They knew fairly well my life story. And the dimming portrait attached to the cousin’s epistle conclusively matched Damla to moi. If only I could say out loud my lost companion’s name and alert the house custodians to our comradeship. But they had already guessed it. The excitement lit both their faces as they spoke of bringing Damla back to her deserved place beside me, and hastily arranged a reply that would ensure her quick despatch whilst intimating neither an acquisitive air nor hinting in any way at Damla’s pecuniary worth.

By now you are wondering, perchance, what a samovar is. That is a story steeped in generations of tea leaves.

Ye of British culture might believe your empire to be the world’s greatest tea drinkers, notwithstanding the beverage guzzlers in the land from whom was thieved original tea plants by those plundering colonial pickpockets, The East India Company.

While brewing the leaves of pretty well any suitable plants has been a native habit across the globe for millennia, when actual tea (sinensis/camellia) arrived in Europe (quite recently, a mere three centuries ago or so) it competed with coffee until both became established – which makes one wonder what the savages of Europe drank before that.

You would, upon cursory research, determine the samovar to be a Russian contrivance. Well, it was, maybe, but Damla is, as mentioned, a Turkish one, and those are considerably less fiddly and less idiosyncratically ornate. They are quite functional, comprising a small teapot upon a larger kettle. The teapot brews its very strong tea while heated by the urn below that boils water. That water is used to dilute the tea according to taste.

The next part of the story is a surprise to Pommies one suspects. Turkey, as established by ingestion statistics, has the highest tea consumption in the world per person, beating Poms by 20 per cent. Turkey was originally a nation of coffee drinkers, and only when coffee became prohibitively expensive a century ago did it turn to tea. The Russian samovar was adapted to a more utilitarian and practical arrangement, of which Dalma is a divine and attractively ornate porcelain exemplar.

There is a large “but” at this point. Sadly for Dalma, gladly for me, the teapot was long ago separated, she knows not when, it knows not where. So long ago she cannot recall its face. I learned all that when we were together.And at the time I pointed out that the teapot was a matched article and so its face must have been just like hers – beautiful.

Good news, is it  not? The teapot of such radiance would rend me with irrepressible jealousy. You know the old saying: two teapots is a crowd.

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Simply by adding sugar, researchers from the Monash Energy Institute have created a longer-lasting, lighter, more sustainable rival to the lithium-ion batteries that are essential for aviation, electric vehicles and submarines.

The Monash team, assisted by Australia’s national science agency CSIRO, wrote in Nature Communications that a glucose-based additive on the positive electrode stabilises lithium-sulfur battery technology.

In less than a decade, this technology could lead to vehicles including electric buses and trucks that can travel from Melbourne to Sydney without recharging.

It could also enable innovation in delivery and agricultural drones where light weight is paramount,” said lead author Professor Mainak Majumder, from the Department of Mechanical and Aerospace Engineering and Associate Director of the Monash Energy Institute.

In theory, lithium-sulfur batteries could store two to five times more energy than lithium-ion batteries of the same weight. The problem has been that, in use, the electrodes deteriorated rapidly and the batteries break down. There were two reasons for this – the positive sulfur electrode suffered from substantial expansion and contraction weakening it and making it inaccessible to lithium, and the negative lithium electrode became contaminated by sulfur compounds.

Last year the Monash team demonstrated they could open the structure of the sulfur electrode to accommodate expansion and make it more accessible to lithium. Now, by incorporating sugar into the web-like architecture of the electrode they have stabilised the sulfur, preventing it from moving and blanketing the lithium electrode.

Test-cell prototypes constructed by the team have been shown to have a charge-discharge life of at least 1000 cycles, while still holding far more capacity than equivalent lithium-ion batteries.

So each charge lasts longer, extending the battery’s life,” said first author and PhD student Yingyi Huang. “And manufacturing the batteries doesn’t require exotic, toxic, and expensive materials.”

Yingyi and her colleagues were inspired by a 1988 geochemistry report that describes how sugar-based substances resist degradations in geological sediments by forming strong bonds with sulfides.

While many of the challenges on the cathode side of the battery has been solved by our team, there is still need for further innovation into the protection of the lithium metal anode to enable large-scale uptake of this promising technology – innovations that may be right around the corner,” said Dr Mahdokht Shaibani, second author and Monash researcher.

The process was developed by the Monash team with significant contribution from Dr Matthew Hill’s CSIRO research group.

The Lithium-sulfur Battery Research Program at Monash University has been supported by the Commonwealth Government through the Australian Research Council and the Department of Industry, Innovation and Science. In addition, the work has also been supported by Cleanfuture Energy, Australia, an Australian subsidiary of the Enserv Group of Thailand.

Enserv Australia hopes to develop and manufacture the batteries in Australia, the world’s largest producer of lithium.

We would be looking to use the technology to enter the growing market for electric vehicles and electronic devices,” said Mark Gustowski, Managing Director of Enserv Australia.

We plan to make the first lithium-sulfur batteries in Australia using Australian lithium within about five years.”

Enserv is an energy research and innovation company that comprises two core businesses: Clean Energy Innovation and Clean Energy Generation.

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It was, after all, the National Summit on Women’s Safety, to be attended and addressed by women. And as our national wag, The Shovel, explained…

Scott Morrison says he is uniquely qualified to speak at this week’s women’s summit given his wife is a woman.

As his 3300 words induced narcosis over attendees who would otherwise be squirming in shitless boredom, all were quite aware that the government led by this man haranguing them from the podium had just passed legislation to make workplaces safer for women, but with only six of 55 recommendations from a “revolutionary” enquiry by Sex Discrimination Commissioner Kate Jenkins.

Fathers’ Day – even farther out

As the eastern half of the continent (to those in the US, yes, it’s a large island) was locked down by COVID19’s Delta strain – family visits for Fathers’ Day off the agenda, no interstate funeral or welfare visits, ruined weddings, and pubs sans crawls – the PM thought it quite reasonable to hop onto Wombat One and fly home to Sydney to visit Jen and the girls. Australia is a big firm, so we shouldn’t complain just because it left the taxpaying plebes $4,000 out of pocket, and rubbed more salt into that wound – that the rich and powerful do indeed live under different laws.

The lad has a habit of dashing off to somewhere or, while somewhere, off course to somewhere else. Hawaii during a national bushfire disaster; a COVID-unfriendly visit to genealogy remnants during a UK visit.

Pfizer hunts Hunt

Several months ago disturbing rumours circulated that the government was asleep at the wheel in early 2020 and missed getting a good dose of Pfizer despite that company’s efforts to receive an order.

The word was that Pfizer couldn’t get the attention of the Minister for Health, Greg Hunt, and negotiations limped along with some lesser departmental minions more interested in red tape than buying some, you know, vaccine during a global pandemic.

Her Majesty’s Loyal Opposition (The Australian Labor Party) finally managed to extract email transcripts that plotted the merry odyssey in considerable detail.

The bottom line of this ongoing kerfuffle is Australia’s pitiful vaccination rate, the blame for which sits squarely in the lap of prime minister Scott Morrison whose famous last words describe his government’s and his attitude: “It’s not a race.”

Australia sits stubbornly near last in the COVID-19 vaccine dosage rate for OECD list of countries.

Consequently, Covid’s Delta variant cripples the nation’s two largest states, Victoria and New South Wales. That’s half the population, about 13 million people locked down.

This is due entirely to the government’s failure to: 1. Buy enough vaccine;  2. Manage quarantine. The first failure is the health minister’s fault. The second is the government’s, which means it’s the PM’s fault. Nearly two years into the pandemic, there’s a vague chance that hotel quarantine is an abysmal failure, for obvious reasons, ventilation being a big one. One can only guess it was seen as a business-friendly option. Keep that sector of commerce rolling along. But the states had no choice as the government was serially uninterested, despite blind Freddy calling it early in 2020 – foresight that the government tells us is hindsight.

Well, it is now.

Effortless Effort

The saga continued for a second day (totally baffling the 24 hour news cycle) as PM Morrison opened his mouth, or minister Hunt penned an inane op-ed. Hunt’s musings boiled down to praising “Aussie spirit of helping our mates” Oi Oi Oi, as if we were all on the Kokoda Trail again.

Morrison just did his usual obnoxious bullying at yet another faux press conference.

JOURNALIST: What efforts did you make to get more than those ten million [Pfizer vaccines] ?
PRIME MINISTER: Every effort that we could.
JOURNALIST: In what way?
PRIME MINISTER: No, I’ve answered the question.

Anyway, noone, the PM said, “has put more effort into that task than the minister for health.”

RUOK?

Um, no. And just as we don’t want to hear anything more about 9/11, Afghanistan, Trump, or, for that matter, bloody COVID19, nor do we want the person most culpable for the vaccination/quarantine snafu open his presser with that acronym.

But he did.

Even to minds sharp and fresh, his opening sentence – a very short sentence by his standard – seemed to lose its way. But did it forget to end itself, or were our minds sucked into the abyss?

Well, before I start can I just remind everybody today it’s RUOK? Day, and the question we have to one another, not just this day but everyday, particularly as we go through the very challenging times of the pandemic, especially those states and territories that are in lockdown and the impact that that has on the wellbeing of Australians right around this country.

After 1400 words had passed, along with several eclipses of the sun, he took questions.

Not to waste any more of your precious time, let me assure you that his very first question was repulsed with the famously aggravating riposte:

Well, I don’t accept the premise of the latter part of your question…

And it went downhill from there.

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A team of astronomers led by Alex Cameron and Deanne Fisher from the ARC Centre of Excellence for All Sky Astrophysics in 3 Dimensions (ASTRO 3D) used a new imaging system on at the WM Keck Observatory in Hawaii to confirm that what flows into a galaxy is a lot cleaner than what flows out.

The research is published today in The Astrophysical Journal.

“Enormous clouds of gas are pulled into galaxies and used in the process of making stars,” said co-lead author Deanne Fisher, associate professor at the Centre for Astrophysics and Supercomputing at Swinburne University in Australia.

 Image credit: James Josephides, Swinburne Astronomical Productions

“On its way in it is made of hydrogen and helium. By using a new piece of equipment called the Keck Cosmic Web Imager, we were able to confirm that stars made from this fresh gas eventually drive a huge amount of material back out of the system, mainly through supernovas.

“But this stuff is no longer nice and clean – it contains lots of other elements, including oxygen, carbon, and iron.”

The process of atoms flooding into galaxies – known as ‘accretion’ – and their eventual expulsion – known as ‘outflows’ – is an important mechanism governing the growth, mass and size of galaxies.

Until now, however, the composition of the inward and outward flows could only be guessed at. This research is the first time the full cycle has been confirmed in a galaxy other than the Milky Way.

To make their findings, the researchers focused on a galaxy called Mrk 1486, which lies about 500 light years from the Sun and is going through a period of very rapid star formation.

We found there is a very clear structure to how the gases enter and exit,” explained Dr Alex Cameron, who has recently moved from University of Melbourne in Australia to the UK’s University of Oxford.

Imagine the galaxy is a spinning Frisbee. The gas enters relatively unpolluted from the cosmos outside, around the perimeter, and then condenses to form new stars. When those stars later explode, they push out other gas – now containing these other elements – through the top and bottom.”

The elements – comprising more than half the Periodic Table – are forged deep inside the cores of the stars through nuclear fusion. When the stars collapse or go nova the results are catapulted into the Universe – where they form part of the matrix from which newer stars, planets, asteroids and, in at least one instance, life emerges.

Mrk 1486 was the perfect candidate for observation because it lies “edge-on” to Earth, meaning that the outflowing gas could be easily viewed, and its composition measured. Most galaxies sit at awkward angles for this type of research.

This work is important for astronomers because for the first time we’ve been able to put limits on the forces that strongly influence how galaxies make stars,” added Professor Fisher.

It takes us one step closer to understanding how and why galaxies look the way they do – and how long they will last.”

Other scientists contributing to the work are based at the University of Texas at Austin, the University of Maryland at College Park, and the University of California at San Diego – all in the US – plus the Universidad de Concepcion in Chile.

Paper details

Title: The DUVET Survey: Direct Te-based metallicity mapping of metal-enriched outflows and metal-poor inflows in Mrk 1486

URL: https://iopscience.iop.org

DOI: 10.3847/2041-8213/ac18ca

Authors

Alex J. Cameron 1, 2, 3; Deanne B. Fisher 4, 3; Daniel McPherson 4, 3; Glenn G. Kacprzak 4, 3; Danielle A. Berg 5; Alberto Bolatto 6; John Chisholm 5; Rodrigo Herrera-Camus 7 Nikole M. Nielsen 4, 3; Bronwyn Reichardt Chu 4, 3; Ryan J. Rickards Vaught 8; Karin Sandstrom 8; and Michele Trenti 2, 3.

1 Department of Physics, University of Oxford, UK
2 School of Physics, The University of Melbourne, Australia
3 ARC Centre of Excellence for All Sky Astrophysics in 3 Dimensions (ASTRO 3D), Australia
4 Centre for Astrophysics and Supercomputing, Swinburne University of Technology, Australia
5 Department of Astronomy, The University of Texas at Austin, USA
6 Department of Astronomy, University of Maryland, USA
7 Departamento de Astronom´ıa, Universidad de Concepci´on, Chile
8 Center for Astrophysics and Space Sciences, Department of Physics, University of California, USA

About ASTRO 3D

ASTRO 3D is a seven-year $40 million Centre of Excellence project funded by the Australian Government through the Australian Research Council. The Centre began in June 2017 and will end in June 2024. It hosts around 200 investigators and professional staff, mostly based at six nodes: the Australian National University, Curtin University, Swinburne University of Technology, University of Melbourne, University of Sydney, and University of Western Australia. https://astro3d.org.au/

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A significant fraction of planetary systems around Sun-like stars have had a very dynamic past, culminating with the fall of planets into the central star.

But a new study involving Monash University astrophysicists sheds light on the scarcity of our Solar System, which has preserved its planets and kept them on nearly circular orbits, an arrangement conducive to life flourishing on Earth.

The research, published today in Nature Astronomy and led by Dr Lorenzo Spina at the National Institute for Astrophysics based in Italy, broadens our knowledge on the possible evolutionary paths of planetary systems, according to study co-author Parth Sharma, an Honours student at the Monash University School of Physics and Astronomy.

Regardless of the technology at our disposal, with millions of nearby Sun-like stars, the search for planets similar to our Earth will always look like the proverbial ‘needle in a haystack’,” said Parth.

However, our results open the future possibility of using chemical abundances to better identify stars that are likely to host Solar System analogues,” he said.

These findings represent a significant breakthrough in stellar astrophysics and exoplanet exploration.

The research refines search parameters for future investigation of potential planetary engulfment events, probes the origins of chemically weird stars, and tells us much about the evolution of solar systems, and planets, like our own.”

Stellar members of binary systems are formed from the same material, therefore they should be chemically identical. However, recent high-precision studies have unveiled chemical differences between the two members of binary pairs composed by Sun-like stars.

The very existence of these chemically inhomogeneous binaries represents one of the most contradictory examples in stellar astrophysics and source of tension between theory and observations.

It is still unclear whether the abundance variations are the result of chemical inhomogeneities in the protostellar gas clouds, or if they are due to planet engulfment events occurring after the star has formed,” said Parth.

The research team undertook a statistical study on 107 binary systems composed by Sun-like stars to provide – for the first time – unambiguous evidence in favour of the planet engulfment scenario.

They also established that planet engulfment events occurred in stars similar to our own Sun with a probability ranging between 20% and 35%.

This implies that a significant fraction of planetary systems undergo very dynamical evolutionary paths that can critically and disastrously modify their architectures, unlike our Solar System which has preserved its planets on nearly circular orbits,” said Parth.

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