Shiv's Brain

Gone!

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 19:40:00 +0000

I have now move on to pastures fresh. You can find me now over at my new psychology student blog. Please come join me there!

Beautiful Bear

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 20:17:00 +0000

With work I get "Flexible Benefits". Rather than being some kind of sexual favour from a team of gymnasts as it sounds, it actually means I get to choose from a list of untaxed potential benefits. Last year one of the options was a 4hr spa session at Elemis Spa in London, and since I needed comforting after the removal of cinema tickets from the benefits list, I decided to select the spa thing.

This morning, almost a year later on a grey and rainy day, I finally walked into Elemis Day-Spa for my treatment - a Moorish Ceremony of Dreams for One.

The Moorish Ceremony of Dreams for One

Rasul, Exotic Hand Ritual, Exotic Frangipani Body Nourish Float, Well-Being Massage, Advanced Anti-Ageing/Performance Facial. Includes refreshing break of nutritional fruit and juice.

Duration of treatment: 4hours 30mins

I arrived quite nervous, ironically. I have never had a spa session before, although I did recently have my first professional massage. Being an ~~overweight~~ cuddly kinda guy, plus with feet that could melt vault doors, self consciousness is always high, so walking into a chic place like a day spa full of all the uber-gorgeous men and woman I expected to see there...well you can imagine how I felt. My panic was intensified just outside the doors when I realised I'd left the voucher for the (£350) session at home. Not something I could really afford to pay just off the cuff like that! Luckily the lady at reception informed me that I'd already given the voucher details, and even better I think I saw only two other visitors to the spa the entire time, and those only briefly.

First I filled out a short form with my personal details, and a description of any medical issues (don't skip this, massage and aromatherapy are designed to heal and relax but if done wrong and particularly on people with certain medical conditions, it can be very damaging too). After the form-filling was done I was led down to take a shower and make use of the lime salt scrub. I have to admit the concept of rubbing salt on my limbs is something that I've never understood before, but the scent of the fresh lime on my skin plus the exfoliating effect of the scrubbing salt did make me feel rather good!

After the shower I was led into the Turkish Rasul chamber and instructed in the use of the muds. This white one for the face, this grey one for upper body, and this dark one for lower body. "You have two and a half minutes then the lights will dim, and the steam will start" I was informed. Two and a half minutes later I've barely covered half of my upper body as the lights go down. Not to be beaten, I finish the job until I look like a multicoloured mud-monster, and seat myself in the Rasul throne - a large plastic seat that is heated underneath. I sit back and try to relax, willing the swirl of the steam filling the room and the gentle flickering effect it is causing on the "star lights" embedded in the ceiling to distract me from quite how silly I felt. A fat naked man covered head to toe in mud and sitting on a plastic "throne". Just as I started to let go, enticed into relaxation by the sweet scent of the steam, I was startled back to reality by the lights clicing back on full and water showering down from nozzles above me. There's only one thing more pathetic than a naked fat man covered in mud sitting on a plastic throne : a naked fat man covered in mud sitting on a plastic throne - and being rained on! Still I did feel rather clean. Whether or not the muds really "drew out the toxins" from my skin or not I couldn't say. Deep down I suspect that's a load of bollocks, but I dont mind because I got to play with mud again once more like I did as a little child. Only, this time there wasn't so much throwing of it.

After I had another shower to clean the mud out of cracks and orifices where I was convinced I hadn't put it myself, I donned the robe and slippers provided and was led up to the waiting room above. Well, when I say donned them I mean I fit abou four toes of each foot in the slippers (definately designed for women with small feet!) and wrapped myself up in the gorgeous soft blue robe and did everything I could to sink into it and disappear. Upstairs, after a short wait, I was introduced to Kelly-Anne my "therapist". Wow, another therapist for the collection. Feeling a bit silly I asked if I was supposed to be wearing anything under the robe, since the only instructions I had been given were to put the robe on. "That's ok," Kelly-Anne told me, "We have some briefs here I can give you for the session." And with that she left me a small shrink-wrapped cylinder to negotiate before her return. The "briefs" she mentioned were more akin to black lace knickers than any kind of briefs or boxers that I have ever known, and I did consider remaining in my au-naturale state in order to preserve my dignity. But then I remembered - I was in a four hour spa session; I may as well put the knickers on and find a bra to match.

As I lay down on the massage bed with aromatherapy oils and various other things being rubbed all over my extremities, I considered the ongoing themes of the spa: Everything I say on or lay on (incliding this massage bed) was heated, and since walking in the front door I hadn't been in a single room that didn't have candles burning and sweet smells wafting in through the ventilation. Later on I would learn that even in the bathroom - although the toilet seats were, almost disappointingly, not heated, - the presence of aromatherapy oils and candles was inescapable. And it was definately working. As Kelly-Ann started on my "Exotic Hand Ritual", which admittedly to my untrained...uh...hands...just felt like a normal hand massage with oils, I could feel myself finally beginning to let go and relax. So when she started scrubbing my feet with more lime salt, then covering them in a heated lime and ginger oil and wrapping them up in hot cloths, I didn't react with the fits of ticklish giggles that I would have expected from myself. Interestingly the foot work wasn't on the menu, which makes me think that she did it as much for her own sake - to escape my cheesy feet smell - as for my very grateful benefit!

Next came the Frangipani Body Nourish Float. Now this was such a strange, and wonderful experience. Imagine, if you will, a large retangular bed somewhere between a single bed and a double bed size. The "mattress" of the bed is a hard surface with some cloths on top, and underneath you can just make out a plastic or rubber covering in the dim candlelight. As you lie on the bed you notice how solid it feels, like lying on a metal bench. At this point you are thoroughly covered in oils of various types, and you also have a sarong covering your front. Then the therapist wraps up the plastic sides of the bed so you feel a bit like an oily human fajita. Finally she presses a button, and you sink into the bed. With lots of bubbling the metal frame lowers down and you sink into the heated waters underneath. The water rises up and around your body, pressing the wrap against you like you're being hugged by the water, and yet because you're wrapped up you stay perfectly dry. When the sinking stops you're floating above the bottom of the...whatever it is, in a kind of water-borne hammock. Once my first fleeting freakout passed ("Thank f**** I'm not claustrophobic!") I soon relaxed completely, all the tension that existed in my body dissolving completely in that warm almost womb-like environment. I'm a little ashamed to say that I may have snored once or twice. In truth this was the absolute hilight of my spa-day, and if I went back and could only have one of the treatments then this, without question, would be it. After a good length of time I was raised out of the water and unwrapped, feeling looser, happier, and softer than...well, ever! Pure indulgence.

I got a bit of time to enjoy my newfound softness as I was taken out for the "fruit break", a smoothie and a plate of fresh fruit and fresh sweet yogurt. I have to admit I was impressed by the quality of fruit, an arrangement of blueberries, raspberries, and slices of honeydew melon, watermelon, and mango. Each piece was perfectly ripe, and not a blemish in sight. Obviously someone must have taken the time to pick out the best fruit from the pack, because not once have I ever seen a pack of fruit this perfect. Just another example of the attention to detail that I was becoming accoustomed to with Elemis.

Then I returned to the treatment room for my wellbeing massage, most of which I think I missed simply by being totally blissed out at this point! I do remember even more oils being rubbed over me though, and trying to guess what the various scents were. It was at this point that I got talking to Kelly-Anne about aromatherapy, psychology, and the aromatherapy shop I found in Leeds. It was nice to have a chat and learn a bit about the woman who had seen (and touched) more of me than most! Kinda evened things out if only slightly, so I could relax even more. This chatting continued as I received my scalp massage, although I had to stop talking shortly into it to avoid drooling everywhere (scalp massages do that to me). Finally I had my Facial, with a mask being applied then peeled off and a number of hot things being placed over my face, massaged into it, and so on. The end result being that my face felt absolutely wonderful, so smooth and revitalised and a far cry from the tired strain I feel most of the time.

I promised myself I wouldn't buy anything when I walked into Elemis, but the fabulous treatment I received there coupled with the tailored skincare advice I was given that targeted my personal concerns (which I had filled out on the form when I first came in) convinced my to buy a few things. So over four hours after I walked into Elemis feeling nervous, getting drizzled on, I walked out into the sunshine feeling a million bucks, relaxed, confident, happy, and carrying a small bag of Elemis branded moisurisers and bath-soaks. I felt, and smelled, so good that I immediately phoned up my great friend Daz and demanded she abandon her studying for the day and come sniff me. Her reaction confirmed what I already suspected: I look and smell fantastic!

Although neither of us can figure out where I suddenly got a subtle tan from.

I didn't keep the black knickers in the end, but Daz and I did go for very girly cocktails, so I guess my masculinity got washed away at some point in the Rasul. At least, that's the excuse I'm going with ;)

I am ALIIIIVE

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 09:22:00 +0000

Ok peeps, just to let you know I'm still alive, still rockin, and still sleeping with your sisters. All of them. At once.

I've finally got around to writing some posts, and I want to dedicate this one to the wonderful CatatonicKid and Svasti who arranged the most awesome birthday ever for me! Let me give you some background: Due to one reason or another I have never had a birthday event that was organised for me. This is in part due to my birthday falling on new years day, so it makes things difficult for a lot of people. However not for these devious two, who got hold of the above fact and took it on themselves to arrange a birthday bonanza for me when I was over in Australia!

It started, as many days do, in the morning. First I got to open my truly awesome presents (thanks guys!!) and giggle like a little girl while I did so. Then I had a special bath prepared, with candles, good smells, and other incredibly relaxing things. After I finally crowbarred my pruned self out of the bath we headed over to the harbour for a brunch picnic. I cannot even begin to say how impressed I was by the picnic, not least by the fact that somehow Svasti had cooked a perfect poached egg, despite saying she had never attempted one before (still don't believe that! :P) and then the two actually managed to transport the thing, still warm and intact, to the picnic! You can see all the other nomminess in the photo here:

Next I got taken to see the *amazing* Avatar in 3D at the local IMAX cinema. If you haven't seen it, absolutely go see it but by all means make sure it's 3D IMAX version, because the visuals are just amazing! As you can see Giraffee enjoyed the film too:

Post-movie it was time for our brunch dessert, and CatatonicKid had prepared something extra special for me: Rhubarb and custard. "What's so special about that?" I hear you ask. Well, back when I was a wee boy my ma used to make this using rhubarb freshly picked from the garden, so it has a serious sentimental value. Especially since I had not had it since then! As you can tell from the grin on my face I enjoyed it immensely :) Although you can't see from this picture that I also had to hold myself back from breaking down into a big blubbery mess, it was an incredibly emotional moment for me - in a good way!

After the noms I got to go snap-happy (yes, I'm a crazy photographer type) at the aquarium, and got to see, among many other things, my first sighting of a dugong. These adorable creatures are thought to be what sailors mistook as mermaids!

As if that wasn't enough already for a total birthday extravaganza, I was then treated to dinner at a very swanky restaurant on the other side of the harbour to enjoy the beautiful sunset, and a DELICIOUS dinner! This included my first ever taste of mudcrab:

and an extra birthday treat:

My short description here, and my couple of photos, can in no way do justice to what is quite probably the best day of my life so far. CK and Svasti, I will never be able to thank you enough for this special day. It will remain etched on my heart for the rest of my life, not only as the incredible day it was, but also as a more general example of just how wonderful some of my blogger friends are, and that in person they are even more wonderful than I had even expected!

Finally I would like to say a quick shout out to PatientAnon, who stayed up till rediculous 'o clock on New Years Eve just to wish us a happy new year over the phone *waves*, and also to TriniGirlBlue - the both of you have something special coming your way via post and I hope you enjoy your care packages as much as we enjoyed picking things to put in them :D

Yark!

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 11:26:00 +0000

Everything is a bit Pete Tong at the moment, so while I try to figure my life out have some cuteness :) This is a Russian version of Winnie the Pooh, and I have to say it's rather adorable. Of course it wont replace the Pooh that I have grown to love so much (yes, I'm a big time WtP fan!) but it's still great to see a version with a slightly different take.

Of course, this Russian version does look like a Bear in the depths of depression! Those big black bags round the eyes, the distinctly overweight round chubby look...ah yes, I can relate.

Thanks to Rumpleforeskin (or whatever name he's going by today) for passing me this video.

Die You Zombie Bastards!

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 08:47:00 +0000

“Do you know what I love?”
“Rubber dicks?”
“Well yes, but that’s not what I was going to say-“
“Rubber dicks slathered to the hilt with peanut butter?”

All the way through watching Die You Zombie Bastards! I kept thinking to myself, "How on earth am I going to describe this?" I still haven't come up with a good answer; DYZB! is pretty much indescribable. The best I can do is come up with a melting pot description, so let’s throw in Austin Powers, Orgazmo, and a selection of Troma movies. Now boil all that down into concentrated liquid form, and knock it back in a shot glass with a slice of lemon and a slap ‘round the face with a wet haddock.

The movie opens on our cannibalistic serial killer antihero Red as he prepares to dispatch a young couple making out in the forest. Touched by their love, he decides to let them live and go murder some “dirty hippies” instead. He's a lovable serial killer with heart, see? Later, Red is enjoying a romantic yet gruesome picnic with his wife Violet, chewing on a decapitated head and smearing blood all over themselves as a family nearby try to shield their young children from the gruesome sight. But the picnic is ruined when - [Continued at HorrorView.com]

Shiv is...

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 20:31:00 +0000

Feeling a bit sad today...

No real reason, just so.

If widget above doesn't load, go here

Another random interesting thing I found today...

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 07:51:00 +0000

A no-budget, sci-fi web series set in the future, Aidan-5 is about a detective who must unravel the mystery of who is behind the serial killings of his own clones.

Very stylish black and white neo-noir blending live action and sketched backgrounds, definately worth a look!

http://www.aidan5.com/

Teh Funnies

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 10:48:00 +0000

In case you haven't seen this before, check out Zombie College - the zombie romance by MondoMedia (creators of Happy Tree Friends and Dr Tran)

Review of the INQ1 Mobile

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 08:40:00 +0000

My contract at 3 came up for a free phone upgrade a while ago and since then I've been looking for something to replace my excellent but now quite senile Nokia N95 8Gb. Sadly nothing caught my eye, everything on offer seemed to be pretty lacklustre in comparison! Unfortunately I was also not allowed to get a replacement same model (and don't even suggest the N97, what a POS that is!).

Then something did catch my eye, an offering from a new little known company called INQ. The phone that was on offer was named, appropriately, the INQ1 - "The world's first social mobile". What caught my eye at first was the touted integration with Skype, Facebook, and Live Messenger; All three applications come as standard on the phone. More excitingly, the entire phone is built as a "social mobile" with the intention of having these applications constantly running. Finally the feature that really made me go "ooooh...aaaaah!" like a little kid at their first fireworks show, was the contact integration. You can import your contacts/friends from any of the aforementioned applications and merge them into a single contact on your mobile; so one friend on your mobile contacts list can have their Sykpe, Facebook, Messenger, and normal mobile details all automatically imported. From there you can then easily do things like see their Facebook status, start a Skype call, or even a messenger conversation!

Then the clincher: On Pay As You Go it would only cost me £70. That's right, a mere £70 for a phone that has more interesting features than other phones that are clocking in the hundreds of pounds! So away I went and ordered myself a new phone...

Contents:
Unboxing
First Play
Faults
I'd Like To See
Summary

Unboxing

The first thing you notice about the INQ1 is that the packaging is gorgeous! It's obvious that a lot of passion has gone into presenting this phone well, and it makes a huge difference to be unboxing something that's put together this artistically instead of a naff little thin cardboard slip-case or something as most of the phones arrive in these days. It gives you a sense of...pride? Excitement? I can't quite put my finger on it, but I have to admit I was loving the phone even before I'd got to it!

Lift up the box lid and remove the CD and warranty card to reveal the phone:

Packed neatly underneath the phone, wrapped in a thin paper band, is the "manual". This isn't a manual in the traditional sense though. Keeping with INQ's attention to beautiful presentation what you actually get is a series of "art cards" with information printed on the back of them...

Incidentally you can find out more about the art and the artists on a dedicated page at the INQ website.

Finally the cables etc...

Finally a look at the phone:

And some side-by-side comparisons with the N95

First Play

Getting the phone up and working was really easy, each time I started an application for the first time it took me through the process of logging in and importing my contacts. Merging contacts on the mobile contacts list was similarly simple, requiring me only to mark multiple contacts (say the seperate entries for one friend for their FaceBook, Skype, and Messenger accounts) and hit "merge" from the menu. Although you cannot merge multiple entries of one type into the same contact, so some friends I have who have multiple Facebook accounts (personal and publicity for example) or multiple messenger accounts, end up having an extra entry in my contacts list.

Once the contacts are merged it's very simple to interact with that person in multiple ways straight from your contaacts list, including sending them messages on skype, facebook, or messenger, or starting a normal voice call or a skype call, and so on. If their Facebok account is linked you can also see their current status, and the phone will automatically set a picture for them from their facebook profile picture. Very swish! Here's a view of the contacts list (specifically of the Favourites subset):

Photo taken from the INQ website (please don't sue me!)

As you can see each of the contacts has facebook, skype, and messenger accounts associated with them and you can easily see your friends' current status.

Adding RSS feeds is also very simple, and you can then even tie them into your contacts so you can easily jump from a contact to their latest blog posts etc. The INQ1 really does let you keep right on top of everything your friends are up to in various social-sites without even having to leave your contacts list.

The INQ1 has only one connection port: A mini-USB. This one port serves the charger, the earphones, and the data cable, all of which are obviously mini-USB format. This does mean that the mobile can charge by connecting it to a PC/Laptop, which is a nice touch! Also the design of the earphones connector allows you to plug the earphone into the mobile, then plug a charger or data-cable into the earphone socket so you can use your earphones at the same time as being connected to pc / charging.

Music wise the output of the device seems good quality (to a non-audophile like myself), and the music browser does seem a lot better than the rather naff and flaky one that came with the N95. A button on the earphones that allows you to quickly pause/resume playback is useful, however a built-in volume dial would have been handy too! Last.fm integration for scrobbling what you're listening to should have been quick and simple (especially since I already have an account) and can be set up to automatically login and scrobble your music as you use the music player. However everytime I tried to login I received an "invalid user" error (despite logging in successfully on the website from my laptop with the same details) so I cannot comment on this at the moment!

I can't comment on the bundled PC Suite as it simply did not work at all for me (see Faults below). However when I plugged in the INQ1 to my laptop it was immediately recognised as a CD device with an autorun feature which installed the necessary drivers for using the mobile as an external modem. This is a lovely feature which makes using the mobile in this way considerably easier than it could have been otherwise. Although I have yet to test this functionality properly, the drivers and modem control software installed very fast and were up and running almost before I realised what I'd done! It makes a huge change from other mobiles I've used which have claimed to be usable as external modems but never quite seemed to work.

With all the applications and features you might think it would be hard to keep on top of what's going on where, but the INQ1 takes care of you nicely. At the top of the screen there is an icon for each of the inbuilt applications, and from each item you can tell whether that application is logged in, refreshing, has messages waiting for you, or even your current availability (sadly the image below doesn't demonstrate that very well, but you can get a general idea)

Photo taken from the INQ website (please don't sue me!)

INQ's support service has made a point of "practice what you preach" in terms of the social face of it's product, and not only has a twitter account where you can keep up with the latest news and announcements (@InqMobile) but they have also set up a Get Satisfaction support site. If you're not famililiar with Get Satisfaction, it is a "Community-powered support" site that I first got to know via the Twitter Support site. Currently there are employees of INQ actively involved in the site and providing help, advice, and support for questions the users have, so if you have got yourself an INQ I really recommend taking a look over at the INQ Get Satisfaction site to see what's going on over there. The design of the site also means that it's easy for INQ to identify the biggest faults and feature requests, which can only be a good thing!

The battery life seems to be fairly average for a mobile that accesses the 'Net a lot; I haven't made any calls with the phone yet (I know, a mobile phone and the last thing I actually do with it is make a call!), however it lasted over 24hrs of "standby" time including having facebook, messenger, and skype running constantly. From completely empty the phone took three hours to recharge.

Faults
Faults, issues, and things that didn't come out quite as well as I'd hoped. Where the fault have been reported on the Get Satisfaction support site I have included a link, so please keep your eyes open over there and if you also experience the fault please click on the "I have this Problem Too" button so INQ know how widespread the issue is.

*PC Suite does not work under Vista (certainly not on my computer, and other Vista users have mentioned the same problem), despite the application claiming to be Vista compatible. A massive fault that in my opinion should have held up the launch of the phone. The bundled PC Suite does not function under Windows Vista at all (at least not for me and for a number of other people I've read about). This means that managing your contacts, messages, calendar, files, and mobile backup are completely unvailable. So far I have been unable to elicit a response from anyone as to why this might be the case and when it is being fixed. After a little bit of poking around I did manage to find the executable MSOutlookSync.exe in the INQ PC Suite install directory, which allowed me to import/export contacts to and from MS Outlook. While this was something of a letdown since I use Thunderbird myself, it was better than nothing and gave me a way to import my mobile phone contacts from my N95.
Far bigger of a problem that the contacts, though, this is actually preventing me from putting any music onto my INQ1 or retrieving the photos I've taken off it!
EDIT: After some fiddling and inserting a microSD card I have managed to get the INQ1 to enter "memory transfer mode" which brings the memory card up on the computer as it would if the card were plugged into a USB card reader. While obviously still far less than idea, this will suffice as a short-term solution until INQ fix things properly.[Get Satisfaction Fault]

*Random reboots. The INQ1 has randomly rebooted five times within the first 24 hours of my having it. Thankfully the phone starts up again pretty quickly, however you do lose anything you were typing at the time and it is quite frustrating. I have not heard anything from INQ about this yet. [Get Satisfaction Fault]

*Connection strength. Something that a few people have mentioned in reviews and something I experienced pretty severely within the first day of having the mobile: The connection strength is incredibly poor, particularly indoors. Sat next to my N95 which is also on 3 the INQ1 had one bar of signal, whereas the N95 had one bar off full signal. This manifests itself as slow browsing speeds, network dropouts, and may be related to the reboots issue (based on my own observations). Also bear in mind that I live in central London, so I am rather dreading what the signal is going to be like anywher else! I have also found out that the phone has been going into roaming mode, but the applications like Skype etc. keep running, so it's eating into my credit with roaming charges! [Get Satisfaction Fault]

*Firmware updates. Apparently, so the discussion on this Get Satisfaction question leads me to understand, if you need the firmware on your mobile updating (possibly more likely than with other mobiles due to the nature of the phone and the changing face of social network sites), you have to send the mobile off to get it done - there is no way for you to apply the firmware update yourself.

*USB earphones. *sigh* I had thought that the N95 and other models at that time had seen the end of USB and proprietary format earphones! WE DON'T WANT THEM! Earphones are notoriously short-lived and having to replace the original set with an expensive special model rather than your own cheap-o standard earphones is incredibly annoying to say the least! [Get Satisfaction Suggestion]

*Flaky "push" email. I have heard a number of reports from people saying the push email has been unreliable at times, sometimes not delivering messages and sometimes delivering them hours late. INQ have responded to my fault on the Get Satisfaction site, with this to say:

"I guess you are talking about Email on 3. The fact that every other network dependent service is working suggests that this is a network/server issue.

I have raised this directly with the guys in 3 who manage this service and hopefully they will immediately be able to identify and solve the issue if it is generic. I will post back on this when I receive some feedback from them.

3 Service team came back to me. They say they were working on the service between 7/08/2009 09:00 and the implementation end date 18/08/2009 04:00."

The issue seems to have been resolved now.

[Back to Contents]

I'd Like To See
One of the biggest problems the manufacturer will have with this phone is that it is almost too good. With such success launching something new it immediately gets customers minds working, and soon there's a list of things that everyone is annoyed that the phone doesn't have. But what we have to remember is that no other phone has done this as well before, for anything like the low price the INQ1 is retailing at. So yes, there are a bunch of things I'm dying to see in later models but I have to force myself to recognise that they're not "missing features" or faults, they're simply because I want more! These are all more "feature requests" than faults.

*GPS. This is the one point that falls on the borderline between a "thing for the future" and "should have been in this phone". The INQ1 does not support GPS, which is something I used extensively on my N95 with Google Maps for navigating my way around london by foot. I'm guessing that to put in GPS would have driven the cost of the phone up, so in a way I'm glad it's not there, but I really will miss the functionality!

*WIFI. Another thing that falls just short of "should have been there", but again forgivable for the sake of a cheaper retail price: The phone does not support WIFI at all.

*Google Calendar integration. The built-in calendar is, sadly, pretty awful. Although I've not tested it myself thoroughly, reviews from other people indicate that you can have a maximum of 20 entries. What I would really like to see is the ability for the phone to link into Google Calendar and use the data from there (including multiple calendars etc). I would say FaceBook calendar too, but for me personally that's less important because my facebook events are automatically linked into my Google Calendar already. [Get Satisfaction Suggestion]

Google Reader Integration. Most of us "social network" addicts already have feed readers set up to keep track of blogs of various friends and so on, so having a completely different setup for our mobiles doesn't really make sense. Much more useful would be the ability to tie into existing RSS reader platforms like the brilliant and free Google Reader. EDIT: Frustratingly, and surprisingly, even the mobile google reader web page doesn't work on the INQ1! [Get Satisfaction Fault (for google reader mobile site)]

Per-Feed RSS Refresh Rate. At the moment you can only seem to define a single refresh rate which applies to all your RSS feeds. This is a little less than useful since certain feeds will update regularly (especially if you have tied into twitter for example), whereas others may not need refresh more than once a week (some of my friends blogs come to mind). [Get Satisfaction Suggestion]

*Twitter. Ok, it's quite a suprise to be honest that the INQ1 offers no support for twitter out of the box! The new models coming out towards xmas will have twitter support built in, however the rumours are that this support will not be provided for the INQ1. In the meantime you can still use twitter, albeit without the tight integration that makes the other applications on the INQ1 so exciting, by installing the truly excellent mobile application Snaptu (I will probably review this application seperately). [Get Satisfaction Question]

*Easier status updates. Somewhat tied to the Twitter suggestion, but just as relevant for FaceBook alone. For a social-mobile it's actually a bit of a pain in the butt to update your FB status, requiring you to jump through a number of online screens to get to the place to do it. It would be much nicer if it was possible to update your status a lot quicker, maybe through a widget on the front screen? [Get Satisfaction Suggestion]

*Linux Support. Ok, considering how flaky linux is with network connections in general I'm not surprised this has been given a miss. However considering the rise of the netbook and in particular of the very-cheap linux-based netbooks, the INQ1 would be a perfect companion to a netbook to allow computing on the go.

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Summary

Overall this is an excellent phone that has a few significalnt faults hampering it's potential domination of the entry-level mobile market. There is no doubt in my mind, though, that this phone is a landmark in mobile technology, showing the consumer that not only do you not need to pay extorsionate prices for a decent phone, but even that a well-made affordable phone can do just as well as the higher end models. For the hardcore tech-nut the INQ1 will seem somewhat limited, especially since the BREW platform (for writing applications) hasn't been opened up to third-party developers yet, but for every else this is an exciting and powerful new phone that provides previously unavailable features to a whole new userbase.

The more I use the INQ1, the more I like it and wonder how I could have existed without it. Considering the price, considering that this is the first model, and considering that this is very much a sigificant push forward in mobile phone techology, I have to give the INQ1 a good score. However the top three faults listed above are so significant that they bring the score down and if it wasn't for how good the phone was otherwise I would be sending this phone back.

Rating: 7/10
(come on INQ, lets see you fix these issues in this model rather than waiting for the next round, and get this score up to a 10!)

It's ALIIIIVE

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 13:19:00 +0000

I hate violence (aside from in movies, in which case I love it). I am not a violent person, in fact I usually do everything I can to avoid conflicts of any kind.
However.
If one more asshole rams another shitty free newspaper under my nose while I'm walking down the street, I swear to god I'll roll it up and ram it up their nostril into their brain!!

It's even worse when youre doing shopping or something and the same GORRAM person practically jabs you in the ribs with these shitty newspapers EVERY FUCKING TIME YOU WALK PAST!!

*breathe*

Ok, quick update. Yes, I'm alive. Still having problems with the liver but generally not feeling bad because of it. The steroids I'm on to keep the autoimmune in check, however, have caused insomnia. So at the moment I'm working on between 0-3hrs sleep a night, and I look and feel a little like the zombies that I have recently become so obsessed with.
I am back at work, however my productivity is pretty shitpoor at the moment. It's hard to program things when the entire screen is one fuzzy glowing blur and your fingers absolutely refuse to hit anything like the right keys (don't ask how long this post took to write - lets just say I look like a very short-sightly one-finger-typist right now!)

My new mobile arrived today, the INQ1. It's a stop-gap until the new phones come out near xmas, but I'll be reviewing it on here later.

Currently I'm in edge-of-the-seat anticipation for my copy of the new game Batman: Arkham Asylum to arrive. Batman has always been my favourite comic-book hero, and the new game really looks to capture the essence of the Dark Knight. Stalk your prey, hide in the shadows, and use detective work to solve mysteries. The only downside is some dickhead of a marketing arsehole decided to make one feature I was absolutely dying to play "Playstation 3 exclusive". So yeah, only PS3 owners get to play as The Joker. *fury rises*

Finally, other than the above, I have been reviewing movies for HorrorView.com, so please drop on over from time to time and have a looksie :) Follow HorrorView.com on twitter: @horrorview

You can also follow me on twitter: @shiv379

Till laters!

I'm still alive

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 12:07:00 +0000

Have some funny..

Socio-biological Self Destruction

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 20:48:00 +0000

I'm back! Did you miss me?
For the very few that don't know, I've been in hospital for a bit. I won't go into all the gory details, I'll just summarise and say it was (non alcohol-related) liver problems, and I'm feeling fine now.

It has been an entertaining couple of weeks though, in a strange way, and I'd like to share some of it with you now. I'll post my thoughts over the next few days, starting with the one that makes me angriest:

Swine Flu
Ok, for fuck sake, get this through your head: If you have no underlying health problems, are not pregnant, and do not otherwise have a weak immune system, then the "ZOMG KILLER SWINE FLU GONNA WIPE OUT THE HUMAN RACE!" is no more dangerous than a normal flu. Yes, it's more contagious. No, it isn't going to cut you down in the prime of your healthy life. Get it? Got it? Good.
Now get the fuck out of A&E.

I did *not* appreciate the two hours of crippling, tear inducing agony I had to suffer before I got to even see the A&E admissions nurse simply because there was a crowd of people ahead of me who all had the sniffles. In two hours I think I only saw one other person who actually looked like they were ill / in any kind of pain. And that poor bastard arrived *after* I did! We really shouldn't be at a stage where the admissions nurse says with suprise and a hint of relief in her voice "oh, someone who isn't here for swine flu!"

For God sake people, think for yourselves for five minutes! Stop being hypnotised by sensationalist scaremongering media and actually go out and find out something for yourself!
And that's exactly why I've not provided you with any links, it's up to you to find, God forbid, the truth! Here's a tip tho: tabloids, magazines, almost anything on television - these are all bad sources.

Chinese Torture (sorry, medicine)

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Sat, 18 Jul 2009 13:06:00 +0000

As many of you know I have had a few problems for some time now, other than depression (which is well under control now) there has been the liver problem which doctors have been thus far unable to diagnose or fix, and a recent inability to concentrate on anything without falling asleep. So half on a whim I decided to duck into a chinese medicine store as I passed, and see what they could do.
I explained the basics of what I was there for and the lady poked me a couple of times and looked at my tongue, then asked me to step into the back room so she could do a proper check.
Lying on my back on the bed thing, shoes and socks removed, I wondered what this was going to entail. "Let me know if this hurts" she said, then pinched one of my toes. "FUCK!" I yelped. Yes, it hurt. By god did it hurt. "The feet is connected to the head, to the brain", she explained, "You have a lot of toxins in your feet and that is affecting your concentration and energy." Some more painful pinching and prodding later I was recommended an acupuncture session, a massage session, and some medicine. "What the hell," I thought, "I'll try anything once. How bad can it be?"

Funnily enough it was the acupuncture that I was worried about, but that part was really not a problem. Felt a little strange of course, but not particularly painful. The massage, however, was excruciating. This style of massage isn't like the common western relaxation massage, this is designed to clear blockages in the body. There was no relaxing happening here as I clenched onto the towel with both hands and tried not to tear it in half as my feet were put through an experience that I can only describe as being shot repeatedly in the foot with rubber bullets for fifteen minutes.

As I hobbled out of the back-room I was given two bags full of strange medicines. God knows what any of them actually do, if anything. Some people I trust very much swear by it all, so I'm happy to try it.

This is my bagful of drugs:

10 pills of each of these a day! I'm gonna look like a complete junkie!

Some strange powdered tea thing. I have no idea what it's called, or what it does.

I'm taking a lot on faith here, I could be putting all sorts of class A drugs into my body and not know it! Hell, it cost enough for that to be the case!

Sand Animation

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 10:15:00 +0000

I can say nothing other than: Wow. Just simply: Wow.

Truly amazing.

Just So You Know I'm Still Alive

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 09:34:00 +0000

Here's one of my favourite songs from when I was younger...

Dusty Limits at Cellar Door

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 08:32:00 +0000

I have been to all sorts of venues recently, mostly for gigs or parties, but nothing has struck me with such a unique charm as Cellar Door. Located in a converted underground public convenience, Cellar Door is easy to miss if you are not looking for it as the entrance looks like the steps down to any of London's toilets or subways. Until you get a bit closer and see the neon sign down the steps, that is. So, many people walk right past without even realising they've missed anything. Which is quite unfortunate for them really.

Descending the steps into the bar you are greeted with red and blue lighting, lips-shaped stools,and an intimate atmosphere. You are served at the table and while you nibble the complimentary popcorn bowl you can choose from a variety of drinks and cocktails (may I recommend the Mai Tai and the Bonnie and Clyde, but recommend against the Von Teese Martini), a selection of nibbles including a pitta platter, and a cheese board, and browse from the selection of snuff boxes. If you should choose a snuff box (I tried the Red Bull snuff myself but wasn't that enamoured of it - was rather like squirting First Defence up my nose!), it is brought to you on a small tray with some straws, a plastic card, and with a few lines arranged on the plate. It's worth it almost solely for the look on some people's faces!

If you have never tried snuff before and you should desire to (bearing in mind it *is* bad for your health, is addictive, and may turn you into an yesteryear aristocrat), then you may want to check out the wiki page, and the snufftaking technique guide, and if you really want impress then check out the rules of snuff taking in the Etiquette guide.

We were treated to a performance by "cabaret singer, comedian and drunken raconteur" Dusty Limits who performed varies songs from everything from pop to Cabaret, toying with the lyrics as he goes and often singing songs in completely different tempos or styles from the original - something which happens more and more as the night wears on and he lubricates his voice with wine ;)

All in all this was an excellent Wednesday night out, and Cellar Door is a venue that I have every intention of revisiting regularly. I will also be keeping a special eye out for Dusty Limits as his performance was as brilliantly sung as it was funny.

Http://www.cellardoor.biz
Http://dustylimits.blog.co.uk
Http://www.myspace.com/smokingquietly
Http://www.dustylimits.com

Pushing my Buttons

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 19:40:00 +0000

I've gotta write about this, it's really got under my skin.
So I'm walking along minding my own business singing along to songs on my mp3 player and I accidentally tripped over this broom a guy was using to sweep the path with. I turned around to apologise and the guy was saying something but having my earphones in I couldn't hear what he said. Took the earphones out and said "sorry? Huh?" Suddenly some yellow toothed skank sat on the nearby bench drinking her can of lager pipes up and starts having a go at me for no apparent reason.
So I'm there trying to talk to and apologise to this dude and some bitch who is obviously so desperate for conflict that she creates it when it doesn't exist, is hurling obscenities at me and calling me "fatty" (seriously, is that the best you can think up? You do realise you're just stating the obvious right?).
It really pushes my buttons when people can't mind their own business. I mean by all means please stand up for someone when they're being abused unfairly, but for fuck sake don't start an argument where none exists! The worst thing is I'm pissed off with myself for effectively letting her win and ending up in a shouting match with her.

Grr!

Festival of Sins: Gluttony 2009

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 01:02:00 +0000

I nearly didn't go to Festival of Sins since I was still suffering from the effects of finishing a bottle of Balvenie with Gorky last night. I am *so* glad I went though! I had an excellent time, met some great people, and watched some great burlesque :)

My one regret is that I couldn't get many photos of the performers other than Mr Mistress, altho I'm hoping to get some photos from a friend. Below is a slideshow of the photos I did get, or you can see my set on Flickr.

Street Art

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 21:50:00 +0000

Rob sent me this by email forward, I was pretty amazed with it so decided to share with you all :)

Edgar Mueller Super Artist

Great Crevase Edgar Mueller. Hard work: Together with up to five assistants,

Mueller painted all day long from sunrise to sunset. The picture appeared on the East Pier in Dun Laoghaire, Ireland, as part of the town's Festival of World Cultures

He spent five days, working 12 hours a day, to create the 250 square metre image of the crevasse, which, viewed from the correct angle, appears to be 3D. He then persuaded passers-by to complete the illusion by pretending the gaping hole was real.

'I wanted to play with positives and negatives to encourage people to think twice about everything they see,' he said. 'It was a very scary scene, but when people saw it they had great fun playing on it and pretending to fall in the earth. 'I like to think that later, when they returned home, they might reflect more on what a frightening scenario it was and say, "Wow, that was actually pretty scary".'

Mueller, who has previously painted a giant waterfall in Canada, said he was inspired by the British 'Pavement Picasso' Julian Beever, whose dramatic but more gentle 3D street images have featured in the Daily Mail.

10 Things You Didn't Know About Orgasm

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 11:40:00 +0000

While exploring TED I ~~came~~ stumbled upon this interesting and entertaining talk by Mary Roach, author of Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex. Enjoy!

Two Ronnies - Mastermind

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 09:55:00 +0000

Can't help loving it ;)

Cheese Chasing

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 20:32:00 +0000

Ok, I know I've just been posting videos recently, I will get back to writing something interesting but for the moment I don't have much to say...well, there is something I could talk about but that's between me and someone else so nerr :P

For now, have a look at one of the most extreme sports I've ever seen. Chasing the cheese.

To learn more about why these nutters are chasing a cheese, have a look at the Wiki page for Cooper's Hill Cheese-Rolling Competition.

Something for the Australians

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 13:42:00 +0000

Are you worried about the state of your politics?
You will be!

It's all about the jazz baby

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 15:34:00 +0000

I've been a bit quiet for the past couple of days, so I thought I'd throw this one your way :)

There's something about this song that just gets me jigging along :)

Cool band of the month

noreply@blogger.com (Shiv) — Fri, 29 May 2009 16:31:00 +0000

This is an israeli band called Mayumana. I don't really know anything else about them yet, but daym this is fun! Kinda an alternative blue-man group but just based around percussion.

Additional:
Ahh fukkit, and another one :)