Shmitten Kitten

Am I a bad person if I keep quiet about my political views on social media?

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Thu, 03 Nov 2016 14:49:00 +0000

I'd really love to post funny memes and articles on social media supporting my preferred presidential candidate. But, I don't want to be one of those people who post about politics constantly on their newsfeed. My cousin supports the other side and I had to unfollow him because I found the stuff he shared so upsetting. However, my silence feels like support for a certain frothy-haired, ill-tempered candidate, which I'm also not comfortable with. Should I just say "fuck it" and post what I want or should I refrain? I'm torn!

You are not a bad person for resisting the urge to turning your social media pages into one giant political bumper sticker.

I understand why people feel the need to share articles they're passionate about. You want your friends to enjoy and find value in the same stories and articles you do. But, let's be honest: social media's newsfeed isn't the best place to have nuanced political conversations. It's designed for people who agree with you and enjoy your content. That's what all those thumb's ups and heart icons are for: quick, easy, positive interactions. It's not designed for getting into deep political discussions with your second cousin.

When you talk with someone face-to-face, you have physical cues -- nodding, leaning forward, scrunching a nose, crossing one's arms -- to suss out whether it's a productive discussion. But the internet strips those clues away. The internet is great for a lot of things -- Oscar Isaac gifs, old Triumph the Insult Comic Dog videos, Westworld fan theories on Reddit -- but it's difficult to convey tone. That's why it feels so hostile to post an article you agree with and see it attacked by people with different views in the comments.

Of course if you feel you absolutely must share something, you could always target the message to a specific group of friends in your privacy settings. Yes, you're basically preaching to the choir, but what's the alternative? Exchanging harsh words with an acquaintance from high school who's in the mood to lash out? If you'd rather avoid that kind of interaction, then what other choice to you have? You can unfriend everyone who doesn't share your political views, or target your message to a select group of sympathetic buddies.

Maybe there's a secret Discord group you can join (or create!) where you share these articles and memes with other like-minded people. Or, if you must share something, go old school and email your favorite articles to a select group of friends. Or maybe explore other social media platforms where you can let your political flag fly without attracting boneheads. Read and share your favorite articles and memes on there. Or create a blog where you can post all those articles and memes you want to share.

It's a highly personal decision, so do what feels right. In the old days, you'd have to call your aunt on the telephone to hear her thoughts on politics. Now you just log into an app and her nutty thoughts are pushed in front of your face. Of course it feels weird!

There isn't an elegant, consequence-free solution to posting political content without limiting your audience. So no, you are not a bad person if you keep quiet about your political views because social isn't the best medium for this kind of interaction for all the reasons I listed.

Does this answer still not sit well? Are you still unsure? Maybe it feels like you aren't being true to yourself. But social media isn't your true self; it's a curated portal into specific parts of your world. It's not you. It will never be you. Once you shift your expectation about what social media is, then maybe the answer will come easier to you.

What do you guys think? Should people feel free to post whatever they want on their pages or should they keep political stuff to a minimum? Tell me in the comments.

Should I Be Friends with My Ex?

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Wed, 02 Nov 2016 19:09:00 +0000


Would Freddy Mercury be friends with his ex? NO! He'd mount Darth Vader's shoulders and belt out a tune.

My boyfriend of three years broke up with me last month and he insists on still being friends. I really miss him so I'm torn. But every time his name pops up on my phone with a silly text about his day, my heart breaks all over again. Am I crazy to want some space from him right now? Or should I push through my discomfort and try to be his friend?

He's being selfish. That’s probably why this all feels so icky, because this need to be friends is about him. It sounds like he’s intent on coming off as the “good guy” here. He probably feels guilty for ending it and is pushing this friendship on you to lessen his guilt.

Two words: FUCK THAT.

Repeat after me: he doesn’t get to dictate your reaction to his decision. He hurt you. It doesn’t do either of you any favors to pretend otherwise. The kinder, more respectful thing for him to do is to let you retreat to your corner and lick your wounds. How are you going to get over him if he’s texting you dumb observations throughout the day? You can’t! Besides, the truth is you aren't in a position to be his friend right now. Your heart needs to heal. In fact, this is one of the few times in life you can unapologetically put your emotional needs first. If you need to roll up in a ball, cry at random commercials, and buy a lot of weird face masks at Sephora as a self-esteem boost, fucking do it.

I strongly suggest you stop talking to him for a while. Like, there should be no communication for at least six months. Possibly up to a year. When seeing his name doesn’t make you want to hurl, that’s a good indication you could potentially resume a friendship.

But even then, for a friendship to work, you both have to be 100% over each other. He could lie naked next to you in a bed and you will have no desire to touch his body. That’s where you two need to be before you even attempt a friendship. In time--I'm talking a year or two at least--you can reconnect to see if there's a friendship there.

For now, protect your heart. You can't be his friend. He ended your relationship, but it's on you to take control of your life from this point on. You decide who you’re friends with. Don’t give him that power just so he can avoid feeling guilty. Because the only one who continues to hurt in this scenario is you.

Hey Jealousy, Flaky Dudes, and Movie Recs

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Fri, 14 Oct 2016 18:08:00 +0000

Sorry to bother you, but I've got a big problem. My boyfriend continues to stay in touch with his ex even though he knows it upsets me. They only dated for five months but I've seen the texts saying he loved her when they were together. We are very happy (apart from him emailing her) but it's tearing me apart. How can I stop the feeling of jealousy?

I don't blame you for feeling jealous! Your dude has an obligation to put your feelings first in this relationship. I think you're totally justified in your jealousy.

As for how to stop being jealous, you have a few options.

1. You can make an effort to get to know her and see that there's no threat there. For all you know, she's a really cool person and you two might hit it off as friends. It's a long shot, but it's an option.

2. The next time he withdraws into a spirited text conversation with the ex, tell him you understand she played a role in his life before you met, but now that you're together, you need him to prioritize your relationship over friendships with former flings. Don't shout. Don't make ultimatums. Just be honest with how this makes you feel and be clear about how you expect him to behave going forward.

Unless he has kids with her or some other strong incentive to be in touch with her, it sounds like he's trying to enjoy the attention of his old flame and enjoy your attention too. It's understandable why he's keeping her around in his inbox, but he should get the message that this behavior's deeply uncool. He's gotta grow up, stop looking for attention from other women, and choose you.

Hi Anna! I've been seeing a guy I met online back in January, and we went on our first date in March and been hanging out since. Well he's been blowing hot and cold. One minute he's really into me and turns the charm on, and the next minute, not so much. The last month he's been lagging and flaky. One minute he will want to see me, and turn around and make plans elsewhere. He'll make plans with me in the same day and five minutes later change his mind. Please help! What's going on with this guy?

It sounds like this guy is giving you a classic case of mixed signals. As to why he’s doing it, it’s irrelevant. You’re still left feeling the same way after interacting with him: slighted.

I’d stop engaging with him altogether. It sounds like you’re spinning your wheels on someone who doesn’t respect your time. Wherever his head’s at, it’s not with you and that’s all you need to know. Take control and stop agreeing to participate in this messy waste of time. You’ll feel better almost immediately once you decide to disengage, I promise!

I just wanted to say firstly, it was a pleasure reading your book Clearly, I Didn't Think This Through. It was short and sweet (no pun intended) and entertaining. This is a random question, but what are your favorite films?

Thanks so much for dropping a line. I'm happy to hear you liked my book. That's awesome!

As far as my favorite movies, in no particular order:

All the President's Men - I LOVE '70s cinema, but this is one of my favorites about how Nixon's Watergate scandal broke. The visual style, the story, and the stellar acting make it a stand-out.

The Big Lebowski - I adore most films the Coen Brothers crank out, but this is my all-time favorite of theirs. So many quotable lines!

High Fidelity - Chicago + record stores + surly John Cusack + wacky Jack Black = heaven.

2001: A Space Odyssey - A sci-fi classic that absolutely holds up.

Back to the Future - One of the best movies ever made PERIOD. It has drama, suspense, comedy, and my #1 boo, MJF.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - I love the texture of the sets, the sly camera tricks, and the incredible imagination of director Michel Gondry.

The Watchmen - The opening sequence set to Bob Dylan's "The Times They Are A Changin'" is a jaw dropper

Apollo 13 - I love the story, the acting, the pacing--it's damn near perfect.

Jurassic Park - An almost flawless film. It falls apart at the end, which is a shame. But it's on the list because I still feel like a kid when I watch it.

That's a good start!

Wassup? Long Time No Talk

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Thu, 13 Oct 2016 17:14:00 +0000

Hello! *waves*

Anna here. Since we last talked, a lot has changed.

The first major thing is I'm no longer on the dating scene. I've been rollin' with the same fella for almost four years and we live together in South Philly with our jalapeño plant, Boomer.

Look how goddamn cute we are
(even though my eyes look super beady for some reason)

I still write a ton. Aside from a steady gig writing about food and culture for The Kitchn, I've penned pieces for The Washington Post, The Philadelphia Inquirer, Refinery 29 and more. I also send out a newsletter where I talk about things I adore (TV shows, apps, articles, and makeup) and things I want to kick in the dick (Ben Affleck's forehead, seasonal allergies, Farrah Abraham's entire existence).

Thanks for reading Shmitten Kitten even though it's no longer active. I hope you get some chuckles looking over these posts.

Where Have All My Guy Friends Gone?

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Mon, 11 Jan 2016 19:57:00 +0000

As I'm cruising into my mid-thirties, certain patterns have shifted. For instance, I no longer spend my Saturday nights sweating off my eyeliner dancing with my best friends in a packed club. I've basically turned into a nervous lizard because I can’t eat heavy meals after 8pm. And I don’t stalk my exes on Facebook anymore. There's no point. They're all puffy, balding and look well-fed and happy so what used to feel like a forbidden thrill now feels as exciting as watching a rerun of "Parks & Recreation" while I'm cooking dinner.

But my least favorite trend about growing older is that it is no longer cool for me to hang out with my guy friends one-on-one if they are in a serious relationship. If they have a girlfriend, I'm out. The other stuff I expected. But this, this took me by sad surprise.

Apparently, I missed that entry in my Encyclopedia Britannica

Like a lot of girls, I had a steady stream of guy friends in my twenties. We'd grab beers and gab about well, everything. Work, crazy dates, wild hookups, drama with friends--we'd talk about it all. I've never had brothers, so this is what I imagine it'd feel like. I loved my guy friends.

But as they've each entered long-term relationships, our solo hang time has dwindled rapidly. It's almost like our friendship can't exist if he's close with another woman. It sucks. Over the past few years, my band of brothers has steadily dissolved. Our friendships, which used to be so casual and fun, are pushed aside. It sucks extra hard because I know it isn't this way for his male friends.

"Let's grab a drink, old buddy!" "I can't. I have a girlfriend now."

Now our interactions are limited to hearting Instagrams of his cat and liking his Facebook post about how there's a Game of Thrones beer. That's it. That's what years of friendship has boiled down to. It's pathetic.

Don't get me wrong. I understand why it's happening. I know that kickin' it with women who aren't his girlfriend is not an acceptable way to spend his spare time once he reaches a certain age. And I know that a lot of girlfriends can be threatened by the bond we share. And that sucks. It feels like a wall has been erected, slicing me out of his inner circle. I'm now a relic of his single life, one that doesn't translate to his new reality.

So, yeah, I get it. But, I miss my guy friends. I miss the make-believe family I cobbled together with these loose sibling bonds, which made me feel so rich but now feel hollow.

I'm so emotional about this!!!!! Scott Stapp knows what I'm talking about!

I never thought I'd say this, but I guess having best dude friends is something I need to relegate to my twenties, like rockin' short skirts and wearing pigtails in public. As much as it stings, I've learned to let go. But I mourn the loss in little ways. I'll hover over his name on my phone, debating whether I should try to arrange plans to grab a drink like the old times, but I know our moment has passed. I respect his decision.

Is this just me or have you experienced the same thing? Do certain friendships have a shelf life because your buddy is the opposite sex? Tell me in the comments.

Get The Memo: I Keep My Relationship Offline

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Wed, 16 Sep 2015 15:15:00 +0000

Hey guys!

I wrote an essay for the Washington Post about why I keep my relationship offline. In doing research for the piece, I found out that if you post too much about your significant other, people will think you suck. That totally makes sense which is why I don't do it!

Read the article here and let me know what you think. Do you post pics with your boo with two middle fingers in the air not giving a fuck, or do you keep it close to your chest and off your newsfeed? Let me know in the comments.

I Now Present You With The Official Shmitten Kitten Bad Date Bingo Card

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Wed, 05 Aug 2015 21:45:00 +0000

Next time you have a crummy date, refer to this card. Let me know if you get Bingo because, hey, even if you weren't able to score on your date, you could still be a winner.

Real Talk: Ain't Nuthin' Wrong With Sending Texts From the Toilet

noreply@blogger.com (Colleen) — Wed, 15 Jul 2015 18:34:00 +0000

Your man texts you a funny meme from the third page of Imgur or Reddit. You giggle and continue about your day and think nothing of it. Like most text messages, it zips out of your consciousness as soon as you tuck your phone back into your purse.

Maybe if it's an especially compelling text, you'll send a series of emojis back--a pancake next to a crab and a cat with a party hat on, or a martini glass next to the waving and dancing lady. I'm a big fan of the thumbs up next to the smiley face wearing sunglasses because that's how I roll.

But, in all likelihood, I’d imagine that at least 35% of these daytime texts are composed sitting upon a man's most sacred throne: the toilet. In fact, the odds that a man is texting a woman at this very moment from the porcelain confessional are overwhelming. It's more pervasive than outraged tweets about the government shutdown.

For those of you who refuse to accept that nature and technology converge on the regular, you need to get over it. It’s not that big of a deal. You probably didn’t even know he was texting you from the toilet when it was happening. It's a victimless crime, like taking two samples at Costco or tearing the tags off your mattress.

After recently receiving what I know to be several texts from the time squatter, I felt that toilet texting is wildly misunderstood. It's got a bad rep. In fact, I think toilet texting should be viewed as a positive sign in a relationship for a couple of reasons.

1. Time spent at the thunderdome is a sacred time for people. It’s when a man can let his hair down, escape from life's stressors, catch up on his Facebook feed and maybe play a few rounds of Words With Friends. It’s a time of meditation and self-centering. If your man is taking the time out of his daily 2:00 PM meeting to drop you a line while he's dropping a deuce, he probably likes you.

2. It means that your beau doesn't take himself too seriously. Maybe I’m just foul-minded and hopeless, but I don’t mind a man who can laugh at himself, especially when his pants are around his ankles. It evens the playing field for women like me, all of whom are prone to fits of inappropriateness and the giggles.

3. It’s funny when your man leaves the room for fifteen minutes and starts texting you from across the house. That’s a toilet text and the fact that he’s not ashamed of it is good fucking news to me. I can always use a good meme and a guy who can make me laugh. But, gentlemen, if you think that your woman hasn't done it too, you’re fucking kidding yourself.

Toilet texting is one of the joys of living in 2013. So next time you hear someone cracking up in the can, know that he's 'avin' a laff in the loo on his mobile while he takes a wee (that's British!).

Dear Shmitten Kitten: How Do I Let This Guy Down Gently?

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Fri, 29 May 2015 17:26:00 +0000

I received a letter from my reader, Arielle, who doesn't know how to let this guy down gently. Naturally, she asked me what to do even though I'm a total spazz in roughly 99% of my interactions with other people.

Eh, let's not do this "dating" thing. Cool?

Hey Anna!
I love, love, love your blog and book. I'm a huge fan! I need some advice though since I'm relatively new to dating.

I went out on three dates with this nice guy, but we're just not compatible. We have mutual friends so I can't just ignore him and let it fizzle out. He's asked me out again, but I'm not sure how to let him know that I'm not interested. It's important that I don't come off as a bitch, but I need to make it clear that this isn't happening.

What's a girl to do?
Arielle

As a woman who'd rather dye her hair blonde and move to another state than tell a guy that I'd prefer not to share a plate of pad thai while he tells me about his day, I'm going to give you some advice. But it all depends how he asked you out.

If he asked you out by text, I'm going to need you to take a deep breath and type out the following: "I've had a lot of fun getting to know you, but I think we should keep things on a friend level. Cool?" My hope is that by prompting him with a question on the end like that, he'll quickly respond, "That's totally cool. No problem." And then you continue to enjoy your life guilt-free. If he tries to suss out why you aren't interested in moving things forward, don't take the bait! Just keep re-iterating that you two are better off as friends.

If he asked you out over email, you're going to need a little bit more of a composed response. I'd go with something like, "It's been a lot of fun getting to know you, but I think we're better off as friends." Really, keep it as short as possible. Don't go into reasons, don't tell him that the thought of seeing his naked body makes you want to puke. Just be concise, upbeat, and firm.

If he called you to ask you out and you feel like you have to call him back, I say just send him a text instead. Is it bad form? Maybe. Do you really care? Eh, you've only been out a few times so he'll just have to get over it.

Some people will tell you to break up in person, but that's bullshit. Who's got time to arrange a meeting all just to tell him to buzz off? No one's got time for that!

However, and this is important, you can't be weird when you see him next. You are now a robot and it's your mission to be cool as shit. If you're weird, it'll make him feel 100x weirder, trust me. The ball is in your court since you did the dumping. Never bring up the text or email you sent him. You have to act like he's your best friend's cousin; just be super cordial. You're going to need to summon all of your acting skills to pretend that the Failed Dating Disaster of 2013 never happened.

Good luck! Let me know how it goes. If anyone has any other suggestions, leave 'em in the comments!

I Have A Newsletter, Yo!

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Fri, 08 May 2015 17:47:00 +0000

Me, basically

Hey guys! I haven't posted on here in a while, as I've been too busy slurping ice coffee now that the weather is above 75 degrees.

As a head's up, I started a weekly newsletter as a fun way to talk about whatever I'm obsessed with. Things I love. Things I wish I could set on fire. Movies, TV shows, beauty products, phone apps, maxi dresses; they're all fair game. You can read the first missive here and you can sign up to receive updates delivered to your inbox below.

And, I'm still writing a weekly advice column for the Frisky called "Make It Stop!" where I nip some shit in the bud. If you have any questions you want me to answer, email 'em to me at anna@shmittenkitten.com. I usually tweet out links when it's up, so keep an eye on my Twitterfeed for it.

Happy weekend, everyone!

Story Time: How Do We Feel About Spending the Night Together After the First Date?

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Fri, 10 Apr 2015 17:07:00 +0000

Is spending the night after the first date
a recipe for disaster or a recipe for awesome?

I recently caught sight of a guy dining at the restaurant he dumped me at like, five years ago. I didn't even see his face; I just saw the back of his head and immediately knew it was him. (I have all sorts of skills, people. Apparently, non-facial recognition is one of them.) It was a jarring experience, as you can imagine. It felt like I was in a bad dream.

Okay, so he didn't technically dump me; we'd only been out twice. He just happened to mention on our second date at this restaurant that he wasn't looking for anything serious and that he didn't think we should see each other anymore. I don't why we needed to eat expensive salads while he told me this revelation, but whatever. I was more pissed that I did my hair and wore fancy shoes for no reason. No one wants to put mascara on to their own dumping.

Anyways, I was looking at the back of his head and I remembered our stupid lunch date so many moons ago and then I remembered our first, salad-less date. It was a great date! We ate dinner at a trendy restaurant. Conversation flowed easily and he told me that he thought I was pretty. We held hands. We kissed in his elevator. It couldn't have gone better. That's why I spent the night with him because I wanted to keep the fun goin'. It turned out to be a mistake, one which I kicked myself about for a very long time. I shouldn't have stayed over. Maybe we would've had a better shot at dating if I'd held out a bit longer? Can it work out when two people just jump right into it after a great date?

What do you guys think? Is spending the night after the first date a recipe for disaster or a recipe for awesome? Do you have any special rules about it or do you go with what feels right when it feels right? Tell me in the comments!

Phrases We'd Like To Stab In The Face: "I'm Not Looking For A Relationship Right Now"

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Thu, 02 Apr 2015 18:21:00 +0000

Sometimes I think that there must be an underground secret society where guys rack up points by saying this phrase to me. Maybe it's like skee-ball where they earn tickets for saying it and they can redeem the tickets for, I don't know, a baseball hat or a stuffed animal or some shit. In other words, guys say this to me. A LOT.

Personally, I've never looked for a relationship. Usually it's something I'm compelled to do against my better judgement like spending a sunny afternoon indoors watching a mini-marathon of MTV's True Life or ordering a shitton of tank tops online from Old Navy because they're on sale. No, I fall into relationships. It's like how Indiana Jones fell into that pit of snakes; similarly, there's a lot of trapdoors and dim lighting involved.

I know he's probably just trying to spare my feelings when what he really wants to say is that he doesn't wanna hear my opinions on "Mob Wives" anymore (they're not in the mob and most of them aren't married; it's a misnomer!). Maybe I'm too tall for him and he's sick of everyone staring at us when we walk in a room together but he doesn't know how to say that without sounding like an insecure dick.

Or maybe he really doesn't wanna be in a relationship with anyone, which I can respect even though it's the dumbest thing I've ever heard because I'd make a great girlfriend! I send funny text messages. I'll scratch his back anytime he wants me to. I own two seasons of "Mr. Show" on DVD. If that doesn't make for a perfect relationship, then I don't know what does.

No, I understand why he'd say this phrase to me. Relationships take a lot of work and sometimes a person's just not up for the challenge. It's not anyone's fault. I get that but it doesn't make it suck any less to hear him say it.

Flippin' Our Shades At Food Dude, "FX Movie Download" Host, and All-Around Renaissance Man, Adam Gertler

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 09 Mar 2015 19:15:00 +0000

Chef. Harmonica player. Reality TV star. Sausage King of Venice Beach. Karaoke champion. Comic book nerd. Host with the most. Is there anything Adam Gertler can't do??

Philadelphians probably remember Adam as the chef at Locust Street's dearly departed The Smoked Joint: A Barbecue Experience, where both his cooking chops and his karaoke skills were on frequent display. (Yes, that was him, answering to "Doc G" and scooting around the floor flat on his back, squawking along to "Midnight Rambler" on his harmonica, his flame-embroidered suspenders hoisting his chef's pants up). He has since competed on season four of Food Network's "Next Food Network Star," making it to the finals, and hosted two follow-up series, "Will Work for Food" and "Kid in a Candy Store." Although he left Food Network in favor of hosting "FX Movie Download," his love of food drove him to amateur sausage making, and he is now the official Wurstmacher of West Coast-based Dog Haus Dogs. In his spare time (ha!) he lets his inner comic book nerd loose on a weekly podcast, "DC Movie News," and puts those karaoke-honed harmonica skills to good use with The Freedom Ledges.

In short: whatever your preferred flavor of Nerd Hot, there's something for you at the Doc G Buffet.

Adam was kind enough to catch his breath and answer our pressing questions. He doesn't bite unless asked or provoked (and no, much to his chagrin, the Wolverine claws are not, in fact, permanently attached to his adamantium-encased skeleton).

1.What's your idea of a perfect date?
Adam Gertler: One where the conversation is flowing without ever having to think about the flow of conversation. When the date's over and you wish it wasn't. I love food, so I can learn a lot about people from how they eat; what they eat; if they care about what they eat at all. If someone thinks that food is no big deal, and merely a means of sustenance, she's probably not a great match for me.

2. What do most guys do wrong when they're out with a girl?
AG: I think trying to dominate the conversation and 'sell yourself' is a big mistake. The best thing you can do on a date is make a girl laugh -- but you need to get a sense of her humor, or else you risk the pitfalls of perceived douchebaggery. Being complimentary is good; too much is no good. And there's something to be said for playing it a little cool.

3. What's the worst thing a girl can do on a date?
AG: Talk about her ex in a positive way. Other than that, general negativeness is pretty unattractive to me. Negativeness about herself, even worse. Confidence is very sexy to me.

Tell us a secret!
AG: I'm afraid that I'll never find someone that loves me as much as I love them -- or vice versa. The odds of a long-term match seem farther away the older I get. Recently, I've been involved with people that I was pretty into, and it was ultimately unrequited. Conversely, I'll go out with someone and she'll fall hard and fast, and I find myself wondering, "Is this ever going to add up to something equal?"

4. What advice would you give a younger version of yourself about dating?
AG: Don't be afraid to approach someone you're attracted to. Don't be so scared of rejection (it's only a 'no'...) Slow down; it's not a drag race, cowboy.

5. What would you put on a mixtape for a woman that you liked?
AG: "Ramblin', Gamblin' Man" - Bob Seger
"40 Day Dream" - Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes
"Can't You Hear Me Knocking" - The Rolling Stones
"Jersey Girl" - Tom Waits
"Isis" - Bob Dylan (Rolling Thunder Revue)
"Into the Mystic" - Van Morrison
"It Ain't Me Babe" - Johnny Cash
"Alison" - Elvis Costello
"Something" - The Beatles
"One More Cup of Coffee" - Jack White
"Loving Cup" - The Rolling Stones
"Comes a Time" - Neil Young

Yes, gals, he is single and looking, so go ahead and dust off your best karaoke standard / sausage joke / fangirl story about meeting Stan Lee and say hello on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram.

RE-POST: "I Feel Like My Chances of Finding Love Are Hopeless" via The Frisky

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Mon, 16 Feb 2015 19:48:00 +0000

I'm not sure if you've seen it, but I've been doing an advice column called "Make It Stop!" over on The Frisky for the past few months. Mostly I field questions about pesky co-workers and thorny family problems. But this week's question was the most profound one yet. It was about how to deal with feeling hopeless in love. I've re-posted it in its entirety below. I'm proud of my answer and I thought it might help some of you out there that are struggling with the same thing. And if you have any questions you want to submit, email me at anna@shmittenkitten.com. Hopefully I can nip some shit in the bud for you.

I’m 31 years old and I’ve never been in relationship, nor have I ever been in love. I look at couples — married, cohabiting, dating — and I’m so envious of their ability to open up and create something with another person. Sometimes I feel like I’m too broken to even be considered by the universe to find love. I’ve never suffered any emotional or mental trauma that would provoke these thoughts, but I wonder if it’s self-preservation. I feel as though I’ve put myself out there, but each time I’m unsuccessful. Any advice for someone feeling a little hopeless?

The bad news: your attitude needs an adjustment. The good news: adjusting your attitude is free! Instead of telling yourself that you’re a failure, correct that narrative in your head and say that you just haven’t found the right person yet, which is totally okay and super normal.

You say that every time you put yourself out there you’ve been unsuccessful. How you’re looking at these interactions could be part of your problem. Put it this way, is it a failure if you ordered crappy nachos at a restaurant? Would you say that you “failed” as a customer? Or would you say, “Hey, at least I tried this restaurant’s nachos but man, they sucked” and go about your day? You learned that you don’t like salsa out of a jar and that you prefer fresh jalapenos to pickled ones. That’s what dating is: trying new things, seeing what you like.

One day you will order nachos and you will recognize why they’re incredible: the chips are crispy, the cheese is perfectly melted, the guacamole is tasty and the jalapenos are fresh as hell. And you will know how kick-ass these nachos are because you’ve had so many shitty orders of nachos. You’re now a nacho expert and you can say with certainly that those nachos currently in front of you rule the hardest.

Dating is the exact same way.

Each time I dated someone who wasn’t a good fit, I learned something about myself. I learned that I can’t be with someone who scolds me if I stuff my face with brownies when I’m PMSing. I can’t be with someone who makes me feel bad for loving Fall Out Boy. I can’t be with a smoker. And I can’t be with someone who refuses to watch movies with subtitles.

Are these relationships failures? Hell no! I now know myself better than ever because of these “failures.” That’s a gift.

Speaking of gifts, and I tell you this as someone who spent most of my 20s and early 30s single, this time you have alone is a gift. You have the time and energy to throw yourself in whatever projects you want. Travel to the places you want to go. Make you the best version of yourself that you can be.

Hold on to your laptop because I have a giant spoiler alert: relationships don’t magically make everything better. That feeling that you’re looking for, that all-encompassing love and acceptance, starts with you. Until you have it independently, you can’t have it instilled by someone else. That’s the huge secret of relationships. Once you realize that no singular relationship will complete you, you will truly be free.

Listen, I’ve been in your fuzzy pink slippers. It’s not easy to keep hope alive especially when it seems like a romantic relationship is less likely than “Homeland” being good again. If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t find myself in a committed relationship until I turned 35. It’s not our parents’ world where if you didn’t find a partner by 25, you’re branded a spinster. If anything, the sooner I realized that the longest relationship in my life was with myself, the happier I was.

And keep in mind that relationships—even the happy, healthy ones—take a lot of time and work. There’s no magical happily ever after. Committing to a life with someone takes a serious amount of negotiating, compromising, and communication skills. Those happy couples mooning over ricotta pancakes at brunch? I guarantee you that their relationship navigated some bumps too. It’s easy to forget that when you only see them at their best.

Anyways, you know what’s worse than being alone? Being with the wrong person. That’s a hell unto itself. That would be a true failure for you. So far you’ve avoided that, which is fantastic. Seriously. You haven’t settled just because you’re lonely. You’re pushing through the loneliness and I promise you that it will be worth it in the end. Just keep being the best friend and family member you can be. Because when you do meet the right person, you will need support from time to time. By having a web of positive people in your life, you will be happier and richer for it.

Your mission is to keep being open to new experiences and learn about yourself, so that you will be able to recognize when you’re with the right person. And that’s the true measure of success.

If You Wanna Be My Lover, You Gotta Get With My Guy Friends: The Three Rules of Dude Besties

noreply@blogger.com (Colleen) — Tue, 10 Feb 2015 17:06:00 +0000

While the stomach may be the fabled way to a man’s heart, everyone knows that a bestie is (and always will be) the fast track to a woman’s weak, melting knees.

You know that awkward first group hang, during which a girl manically hawk-eyes all interaction between her new beau and her bestie? It’s a pass-fail exam. To quote from the lady-killin’ wise man himself (Will Smith), “A woman's best friend has to sign off on all big relationship decisions.” And if my best friend loves ya, our relationship will happily proceed.

(Need not apply)

That rule applies to dude besties, too. Even straight ones. And you're gonna need to accept and respect his valued place in my life.

My dude bestie and I do everything best friends are supposed to do. I show up at his house uninvited. I drink beer with him. We play video games. I crush him in Mario Kart. We go out on weekends. We fall asleep in the living room watching The Office and we keep track of one another’s best jokes, quotes and misfires.

If opposites attract in relationships, weirdness unites in friends. My bestie and I are bonded for life by iron steel welded from too much cheap beer, shoving matches and one too many misadventures. His stamp of approval is not optional.

So, there are several examinations to undergo when a new guy I'm dating meets my dude bestie. He has to meet all Three Holy Tolerances:

1. Tolerant of (excessive) awkward touching.
Dude besties are really good at acting like big brothers. That means you will be witness to a lot of bizarre face touching and noogies. These horrifying caresses have one purpose: to annoy the $#^% out of me. Not you.

2. Tolerant of (excessive) bickering.
See aforementioned bestie forte.

3. Tolerant of (excessive) reminiscing.
My bestie and I are closing in on about 18 years of friendship. There is a deep and humiliating well of stories to tell you about. The more I like you, the more embarrassing and lengthy these stories will become.

The truth is that most guys aren't phased by dude besties. He's another guy to catch the game with on Sunday (when I’m visibly not paying attention) and that’s a win-win for everyone involved.

Besides, there are plenty of other advantages to your girl being best friends with a male. He's both my Dr. Phil and my Fox Mulder. He knows when guys I date are being shady or when I’m just being overly anxious. He tells me to calm down about texting guys exactly two days later or when to back off and give the guy some space. He helps you.

But god help you if the words “jealous” and my bestie’s name ever wind up in the same sentence.

That's grounds for excommunication.

Quick Rant: Everyone Is in Love but Me

noreply@blogger.com (Unknown) — Mon, 09 Feb 2015 15:49:00 +0000

Picture this: the sun is rising in New York. Or at least, I suspect it is. All I can see is a sullen glow behind the clouds, the sky and the roadside slush mired in the same 50 shades of grey (see what I did there?).

I shut the blinds on yet another snow-blown morning while it wintry mixes all over the city and grab that reliable portal to the world when it's too cold to venture outside: my iPhone. And what's blowing up Instagram? Swaying palm trees and enormous drinks with no fewer than three unnecessary (yet campy and delightful) garnishes. My guy friends are in singles resorts named after summer footwear and my girlfriends are frollicking on this island or that. Here I am, marooned on Manhattan island, with nothing but an ornery cat, a DVR full of Kevin Costner movies and a couple of stale phone numbers left over from last summer's #Trampage.

Robin of Locksley would never fly off to Turks & Caicos without me.

There's a poignant, if more than a little bougie, sadness in preparing French toast and mimosas for one. And it's compounded by the dreary, monochrome palate of winter in the Northeastern United States, a palate rendered all the more dull by the vivid, tropical parrot-esque color of friends' Facebook posts from closer to the Equator. Happy hour has gone from commiserating over the inconveniences of Winter "Storm" Juno to me, sucking down a joyless parade of vodka sodas, straining to muster sympathy for everyone else's sunburns.

This winter, it seems that everyone is in love but me.

What's lonelier than browsing my cousin's baby shower registry with one hand while Tinder-ing with the other? Maybe booking my hotel room for my best friend's wedding and staving off a panic attack when the site asks me whether I'd prefer to reserve a room with two double beds or a single (wildly optimistic) king.

Or maybe it's dabbing an unexpected, involuntary tear before it rolls down my cheek while I look at friends' honeymoon pictures -- then realizing that there isn't anyone here to see that tear, or the ones that stubbornly insist on following it, anyway.

It especially sucks because I'm missing out on the best cuddling weather of the calendar year. February was invented for wiggling up to toasty armpit crooks and roasty spoon sessions under flannel sheets.

If any of you are acquainted with that rarest of unicorn species, the Manhattan Man Who Is Ready for a Relationship, well wouldyalookatthat?! A unicorn saddle! Just sitting here in my apartment, waiting for a ride!

Keep hoofin' it, Last Unicorn. Springtime has to be around here somewhere.

50 shades, indeed.

Flippin' Our Shades At Author and Blogger Samantha Irby

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Fri, 25 Jul 2014 19:34:00 +0000

Samantha Irby is my favorite writer. Her blog, Bitches Gotta Eat, is one of the best blogs I've ever read. And her debut book of essays, Meaty, is brilliant. People in the book industry talk a lot about having a "voice" in writing and I didn't really know what that meant until I read her stuff. Her voice leaps off the page (or screen or whatever device you read her stuff on). It truly feels like she's talking directly to you. It's incredible. And everything she writes--whether it's about dating, sex, friends, or family--is fresh, honest and relatable. She hails from my hometown of Chicago and I'd like to think if I'd stayed in the Windy City, we'd be IRL friends and not just Internet friendz.

Hot off the heels of an incredible interview with The Rumpus, I emailed Sam some questions about dating. I kept her trademark writing style exactly as she submitted it.

1. What's your idea of a perfect date?
Sam Irby: dinner? or coffee, whatever. eating is awkward. JOKES AND SHIT. in my own bed and asleep by ten-thirty.

2. What do most guys do wrong when they're out with a girl?
Sam Irby: they don't talk enough. nothing makes the ladies crazier than a dude mumbling, or sitting dead fucking silent, during a date. you just met me, homie. you know literally nothing about me other than which emojis i like to use when texting. ASK ME SOME SHIT.

3. What's the worst thing a girl can do on a date? What's the worst thing you've ever done on a date?
Sam Irby: hm. i am slow to criticize girls, because we are pretty fucking perfect. so i would say the worst thing a girl could do on a date is not be 100% herself. i am a person who is definitely guilty of letting it all hang out. here's the thing tho: you could be all vague and mysterious and withholding, but eventually you're going to have to take a shit or burst out in premenstrual tears and dude is gonna be all WAIT WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT INANIMATE OBJECT I'VE BEEN FUCKING THIS WHOLE TIME. or you could pretend to really be into [insert dumb thing he likes] but sooner or later the truth is going to come out and you're going to look like an asshole. and being someone you aren't is exhausting. so don't do that.

i think the worst thing i ever did on a date was knock a bowl of mussels into this dude's lap and then awkwardly punched him in the dick as i tried to help clean that shit up. it was too embarrassing to be funny, even now. he just sat there looking at me like "i am never texting you again." and he didn't. we're still friends on facebook, though, because life is fucking terrible. why can i not delete that goddamned dude!?

4. Tell us a secret!
Sam Irby: every night after work, if i don't go out, i eat my dinner in my pajamas while reading fashion magazines and watching the game show network. especially wednesdays, when they show, like, four hours of steve harvey-hosted episodes of family feud. i am obsessed with him, and i cry when people win the fast money round. every time, real tears. totally gross.

5. What advice would you give a younger version of yourself about dating?
Sam Irby: RELAX, BABY. THEY'RE JUST DUDES

6. What would you put on a mixtape for a person that you liked?
Sam Irby: i could for real go on ad nauseam about this. like, if my life could just be making mixtapes for potential boyfriends without having to risk any of the in-person awkwardness i would be totally cool with that. okay so i would probably try to look cool as hell and flaunt my incredibly varied musical tastes rather than create a sexmood, which i would achieve later with the help of my clunky old humidifier and hastily-applied aspercreme.

A SIDE:
1 "creole" mos def and charlie hunter.
2 "deep fried frenz" mf doom.
3 "half time" amy winehouse.
4 "don't leave" ane brun.
5 "you took your time" mount kimbie feat king krule.
6 "something in the way" nirvana.
7 "the wheel" sohn.
8 "los awesome" schoolboy q.
9 "pull up vibes" beres hammond.
10 "breathe.scream.dream." denitia and sene.
11 "rain smell" baths.
12 "the hours" beach house.

B SIDE:
1 "prelude/there's a lull in my life" cecile mclorin salvant.
2 "nakamarra" hiatus kaiyote.
3 "objects in the mirror" mac miller.
4 "mad lucas" the breeders.
5 "polyethylene (1 and 2)" radiohead.
6 "furthest thing" drake.
7 "blame them" blackbear.
8 "god bless us all" n.e.r.d.
9 "default" django django.
10 "come here" talib kweli
11 "every party has a winner and a loser" erlend oye.
12 "call me" n'dambi.

Follow Sam on Twitter @wordscience and buy her book!

Attention People With Dilemmas: I Can Help!

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Mon, 21 Jul 2014 21:03:00 +0000

I'm not sure if you've heard, but I'm writing a NEW weekly advice column over on The Frisky called, "Make It Stop."

So far I've taken on sneaky roommates and reality TV-shaming boyfriends. And last week I put the kibosh about pesky co-workers and nosy drunkards.

Have a question you want answered? Email me: anna@shmittenkitten.com with the subject "make it stop" and I'll try my best to help you nip some shit in the bud.

I Legit LOL'ed At This Terry Richardson Spoof Video "I Stand With Dick"

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Thu, 03 Jul 2014 17:02:00 +0000

My homegirl Rose Surnow wrote and directed this pitch perfect Terry Richardson-inspired video called, "I Stand With Dick." It completely captures the lunacy surrounding his fandom. Rose is a funny lady and this video did not disappoint. Just watch.

Do yourself a favor and her on Twitter @RoseSurnow.

I'm Leaving You And I'm Taking the Dive Bar With Me

noreply@blogger.com (Colleen) — Wed, 21 May 2014 19:39:00 +0000

I live in a city that’s all about its corner bars. I hang out with a lot of guys at corner bars. It’s what I like to do. Go on a date? Forget it. Throw this lady a beer and shot and we can bypass the rest of that pointless charade.

But when the dream is over, who takes the coveted favorite dive bar?

The answer is me.

I take the dive bar. The dive bar is mine.

I don’t mean to be selfish or immature but like all semi-shared assets in a fleeting romance, bars need to be split according to basic breakup etiquette. They know my name at the dive bar. They make my drinks the way I like them. This is where I go to dish juicy gossip over a cheap martini. I need that particular freedom of speech.

Just like toothbrushes, pets and spare keys, custody should be agreed upon upfront. Really, you’re doing each other a favor by divvying up the bar scene. You can skip awkwardly running into one another on dates. You don’t have to make small talk or fruitlessly attempt to ignore one another. You can simply just go to different bars.

But how do you divvy up the rest of the bar scene?

1. Margarita bars go to the gal pal.
That’s just, like, the rules of feminism. Margaritas bars are a place where females go to laugh about their sexual misadventures and make eyes at the buttoned up mistake at the end of the bar. (Really, what kind of guys are you meeting at a tiki bar?) It’s only right to award this place to the gals.

2. Corner bars are divided territorially.
Whoever lives closer, gets the dive. No one should have to walk more than three blocks to “their” corner bar. It’s called a corner bar because it’s on the corner. People who live on that block go there. End of story.

"I came here to murder you!"

3. Venues and party bars are neutral territory.
You both have friends and interests here. This one is Switzerland. You’re less likely to be forced to interact with one another here. The more crowded, the better, and the easier to duck out if need be.

4. Date bars and BYOBs are at your discretion.
Hit up the Italian joint at your own risk. While I always advise against double dipping at the olive oil bowl, it’s not totally unheard of for you to want to return to a special date spot. Just remember: you do not want to be stuck at the communal four top, together.

5. “Your” bar is your bar.
If either of you introduced the other to a particularly great bar, it belongs to the founder. It’s only fair.

Respecting your Ex-SO’s bar scene is respecting their space. The bar is a place of reflection. This is what we mean when we say that we need to respect one another’s “boundaries.” Me? I just need some space. And that space is specifically located on a corner near my house.

And if he does trample all over my triple sec parade…

Pics and Vids: Finally, An Honest Wedding RSVP Card

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Tue, 13 May 2014 17:59:00 +0000

Happy wedding season, everyone!

via Someecards.com

Flippin' Our Shades at Comedian Chip Chantry

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Tue, 13 May 2014 17:50:00 +0000

By day, Chip Chantry is a fourth grade teacher. But by night, well, he's still a fourth grade teacher, however he does stand up comedy too! He won Helium Comedy Club's Philly's Phunniest 2013 competition and his comedy album "Across from the Adonis" is out on iTunes.

Chip, being hilarious

Here's just a tiny sample of the kind of knee-slappers he tosses out on the reg.

I bet that in another life, I was a guy who didn't believe in reincarnation either.
— Chip Chantry (@ChipChantry) May 1, 2014

When it comes to parenting advice, I trust Alicia Silverstone more than ANY other person who's ever been in multiple Aerosmith videos.
— Chip Chantry (@ChipChantry) April 29, 2014

He consistently cracks me up on both Twitter and Facebook so I suggest you follow him immediately. Since he's playing Helium Comedy Club from Wednesday, May 14 - Saturday, May 17th, I thought I'd pin him down and ask him some questions about dating.

1. What's your idea of a perfect date?
Chip Chantry: It has to be a double date. It doesn't matter where or when. The perfect date is the double date where the general public can plainly see that you are the superior couple.

In a perfect world, you and your date get the other couple to break up mid-date. They create a scene, but you intervene before it gets out of hand. Then, the guy speeds off in his Jetta, or better yet, Audi, screaming and crying. As he screeches out of the parking lot, he immediately gets pulled over. Then you, your date, and the girl from the other couple watch the cop issue this irate and emotionally exhausted dude a ticket as you eat frozen yogurt from across the parking lot. And the frozen yogurt place has malt AND crushed Nilla Wafers as toppings; not one or the other -- BOTH. You then drive the newly single girl back to her place. As she gets out of the car, she hugs your date, and leans in the window and whispers, with a single tear streaming down her cheek, but a smile on her face, "You guys are gonna make it." To celebrate the victory, you take your date back to your place and let her pick her favorite episode of "Arrested Development" to watch on NetFlix. But I guess that's pretty standard.

2. What do most guys do wrong when they're out with a lady?
Chip Chantry: Look, NO ONE wants to see photos from your appendectomy. Just go ahead and delete them from your phone so you're not even tempted to show her, man.

3. What's the worst thing a guy can do on a date?
Chip Chantry: Frame you for murder. I mean, you're having a nice dinner, the conversation is going well, you realize that you have a lot in common. And then, right before the dessert comes out, the police burst in, and she stands up, points at you and screams, "THAT'S HIM, OFFICERS!" You get hauled away, they charge you with MURDER, and you lose your job, most of your friends refuse to speak to you, and even your family thinks you're a monster. You go through an excruciating trial that lasts weeks, but finally, as there is no physical evidence that ties you to the murder scene, you are acquitted and try to put the pieces of your life back together. And the worst part? Dessert was bananas flambé, and she got to eat the WHOLE THING. And you LOVE bananas flambé.

4. Tell us a secret!
Chip Chantry: I worked as a stock boy at a pharmacy when I was in high school. I purposely scheduled myself to work the nights of my 9th and 10th grade semi-formal dances, because I was too scared to ask anyone to go to the dance with me. So when people asked me if I was going to the dance, I would say, "Oh, I gotta work. Yeah, they really need me," and then I would brag about getting a ten percent discount on razors and shaving cream that I barely needed.

5. What advice would you give a younger version of yourself about dating?
Chip Chantry: Look, dude. She made you turn off Rushmore halfway through because she hated it. Break up now. Don't waste the next six months, guy. Save both of you the time and effort. And clean out your car, man. Seriously. Have some self-respect.

6. What would you put on a mixtape for a woman that you liked?
Chip Chantry: When it comes to a mixtape, you just have to know your boundaries. Keep it centered. No matter how much you are tempted, no Elliott Smith, no Muppets. Somewhere in between. If I really wanted to wow her, I would just give her a copy of my live comedy album, "Across from the Adonis," which is now available on iTunes. (Wink.)

Lucky for us, Chip is playing a bunch of dates this summer.

May 14-17 / Helium Comedy Club / Philadelphia, PA
May 22-24 / Helium Comedy Club / Portland, OR
May 29 / Revel Casino / Atlantic City, NJ
June 19 / Revel Casino / Atlantic City, NJ
July 10-12 / Helium Comedy Club / Buffalo, NY
July 23-26 / Cap City Comedy Club / Austin, TX
July 31 / ArtsQuest Center at Steel Stacks / Bethlehem, PA
Aug 7-9 / Goodnights / Raleigh, NC
Sept 12-13 / City Steam / Hartford, CT

Go see him!

Want to Become BFFs With Your Ex? READ THIS POST!

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Mon, 17 Mar 2014 20:05:00 +0000

I wrote a piece for Thought Catalog about How to Become Best Friends with your ex in 9 Easy-ish Steps. I had a lot of fun writing it and I hope it shows.

Pics and Vids: Settle.com, The Dating Site For People Who Just Want Someone Near Them When They Die

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Fri, 14 Mar 2014 01:05:00 +0000

Here's a cute spoof about online dating sites from the cool cats at Super Kudzo.

Want someone, anyone, as long as he or she has a pulse? Are standards getting in the way of finding true love? Well, Settle.com is the site for you. Watch:

My Latest Good Idea: SoleMates, A Dating Site Where You Can View A Suitor's Shoes Before You Commit To Anything

noreply@blogger.com (Anna) — Wed, 19 Feb 2014 20:37:00 +0000

Listen, it's 2014 and we're all busy as hell. We have to convince our friends to watch "True Detective" even though the first episode is a little boring, we have to tweet about the bad weather, and we have to avoid "House of Cards" spoilers. That's basically a full-time job on its own.

Therefore, we've got to cut to the chase when it comes to online dating. Blurry photos from four years ago aren't gonna convince me that this guy is gonna be my soulmate. Frankly, I'm gonna need more information to go on before I commit to any kind of public outing.

So before I invest too much time in crafting long, funny emails about myself, before I suggest a festive, casual place to meet for a drink (or six), and before I tell my best friend his first name along with two sentences summing up what his "deal" is, I wanna see what I'm working with here.

Enter my genius idea: SoleMates, a dating website where guys have to post pictures of their shoes on their profile. (I'll wait here while you wrap your heads around how brilliant my concept is.)

To paraphrase Cuba Gooding Jr. in Jerry Maguire, "Show me the shoes!" because his shoes will tell me so much.

For instance, I don't wanna see squeaky clean, chunky, white Reeboks (he's a clueless, cheesesteak-eating goon) or an old-ass Adidas flip-flop (he's an aging frat dude). No rank Converses (he's a cheapskate punker), or ratty Tevas (he probably has a smelly kitchen). And absolutely no running shoes where the toes are individually molded (he will probably hate my perfume and refuse to watch "Workaholics" with me).

However, I would welcome a classic navy New Balance sneaker or an old-school Saucony. A stylish Hush Puppy? Sure. A classic suede Puma sneaker he got on sale at DSW? Now that's a man I could knock boots with.

Who's with me on this? I think I'm on to something here. What would be your dream footwear on a dude? What would be your worst nightmare? Tell me in the comments.