. . . remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive. ~ Acts 20:35

Everybody has a Fanny.

Mark Clark Sr. shared a powerful testimony during the 2011 Missions Conference in Dover, TN of how he witnessed to an intimidating man on an airplane. He began by talking about when an offering was going to be received for a missionary, he was moved in his heart to give. But, when he pulled out his wallet, he began negotiating about how much. During his time in the airport, he felt moved to speak with this rough looking man, but began negotiating his way out of it. I appreciated his transparent honesty and I, along with most present, identified with what he said.

It is human nature. We are inspired to some difficult task or new discipline and then the negotiation begins.

“We don’t need to do quite so much.”
“We don’t want to go overboard.”
“Surely, nobody would expect us to do all that.”
“Nobody’s perfect.”

In many cases, it is not long before we have talked ourselves out of the action entirely. We usually then pat ourselves on the back for the wisdom we displayed in it all. At that moment, we are like those James reproved for their dead faith:

If a brother or sister be naked, and destitute of daily food, And one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body; what doth it profit?
- James 2:15-16

Like John and Fanny
Jane Austen illustrated the human nature of negotiation brilliantly in her book, Sense and Sensibility. John Dashwood was the principle inheritor of the Dashwood estate. When his father, Henry, lay on his deathbed, his dying wish to John was that he would look after his step-mother and three step-sisters. John was moved by the deathbed scene and the prospect of his rich inheritance to a certain largesse and determined within himself to give his step-sisters a thousand pounds each upon their removal from Norland, the Dashwood home.

John was pleased with his plan and thought it suit his father’s dying wishes well. Once his wife, Fanny, learned of his intention, she was displeased and the negotiations began. She provided many reasonable sounding arguments that the sum was too large. John quickly cut his purpose in half to five hundred pounds a piece.

Fanny pressed the non-specific terms of Henry’s request and soon John adjusted to only gifting his step-mother with one hundred pounds per year. Fanny then waxed eloquent on the sure unpleasantness of annuities and how long half-blood relatives are sure to live if they are to receive per annum. John could see the reason in this and confirmed that surely fifty pounds given every now and again would be far better in the long run.

Fanny returned to the general nature of Henry’s request and questioned if he could have had a gift of money in mind at all. Having come down so far from his original intention, John found it an easy step to dismiss the idea of giving money at all. He thought his father must have meant more of a general kindness and such assistance as was convenient for John to give.

He thought then a small present of furniture when they moved was all that was required of him. Fanny, undaunted, reasoned that they already had inherited more furniture than they could ever need, nor indeed were worthy of wherever they might remove to. She concluded her argument that Henry had already provided for their needs and couldn’t have thought of John giving them anything but general well-wishes and such. John was then resolved that to give them anything would be wrong of him and that he might help them, as he could, to find a place to live.

Austen was very insightful of human character and could paint characters with her words to rival any artist with brush and canvas. If Fanny had suggested in the first place that John was to do nothing for his step-mother and step-sisters, he would have been appalled since he had such a large plan. By cunning craft, she whittled and manipulated until she got him down to nothing and he was resolved to it as his own plan. Solomon has some words of warning for a wife like that.

Whenever I Would Do Good
The truth is: We all have a Fanny. To put it in more Biblical terms, we turn to Paul’s words in Romans 7.

For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.
- Romans 7:14-21

That pernicious wife of our flesh is always with us, and whenever we are moved to do good, she employs every cunning craft to negotiate us down to nothing. Then “the good that I would I do not.” Giving in to Fanny only encourages and bolsters her. It only makes her harder to resist the next time. Soon giving in to her every demand is a way of life for a spineless man.

If we live in slavery to fleshy Fanny, we will not and cannot please God (Romans 8:8). The end of that life is death (Romans 8:13). We are bound to Fanny by law and only gain freedom from her when she is put to death (Romans 8:13). We must stand fast, resist the evil negotiator, and gain victory through Jesus Christ (James 4:7; Romans 7:24-25).

We need not despair. They that have the Spirit of God are His (Romans 8:9) and He is at work in us to will and do His good pleasure (Philippians 2:13). By God’s grace, we can labor more abundantly than all, “Yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me” (1 Corinthians 15:10).

It is not good to eat much honey: so for men to search their own glory is not glory. ~ Proverbs 25:27

Grace in Receiving Criticism and Praise

Critics in the congregation can be a problem for preachers. They are not a problem because they voice a disagreement or dislike to something in the message. They are a problem because most of those critics are amateurs. They do not know how best to form and dispatch a criticism. Their manner is usually rough and can unnecessarily rile. Their content is ill-formed and provides no real help.

These hack critiques are almost as bad as the amateur praise the preacher receives. Honestly, the praise is more dangerous than the critique though the latter feels more immediately threatening. We want to think about how best to receive criticism and praise, but let us first speak to the perpetrators of both.

Everybody’s a Critic
It is an odd mark of this age that nearly everyone fancies themselves a critic. In part this is due to the egocentrism of the day where each person views the whole world in terms of how it affects them personally. I am amazed at common responses to terrible disasters in far-away places. It seems the only concern is whether it will affect the price of gas or groceries at home. As an afterthought, they suppose it would be bad to lose everything you had suddenly in a moment.

Many come to a church service the way they go into a restaurant. They expect a friendly greeting at the door. They want a good seat that is most convenient for their wants. They sit down to be served completely. They want everything to their particular tastes and liking. They don’t want it to take too long and they feel obligated to grade every aspect of the place, food, and service.

It is valid and reasonable to consider how a sermon ministers to you personally. But it is not the only, nor the primary concern you ought to have. At the top of that list are vastly more important questions: Did the sermon glorify God? Did the sermon honor God’s Word? Did the sermon uphold Jesus Christ as the only hope for fallen man and the only way to God?

In comparison to the ADD-designed media today, a sermon is boring. Hearing a sermon well requires extended concentration, and that is not something this age is known for. You may complain of a boring sermon that failed to keep your attention, but your yawns may have more to do with what you did on Saturday and how late you stayed up the night before morning service. Your distractedness may have more to do with skipping breakfast than the actual sermon itself. The problem may lie less with the preacher and more with your self-absorption that causes you to tune out whatever does not speak immediately to your small circle of concerns.

You must seek the truth in a sermon to hear it well. You must also listen to hear a sermon well. Solomon describes the desired demeanor in God’s house:

Keep thy foot when thou goest to the house of God, and be more ready to hear, than to give the sacrifice of fools: for they consider not that they do evil. Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not thine heart be hasty to utter any thing before God: for God is in heaven, and thou upon earth: therefore let thy words be few.
- Ecclesiastes 5:1-2

Listen to a sermon to hear it and not just to get ready for what you have to say about it.

Profiting from Criticism
We could wish it were otherwise, but people seem doggedly determined to retain their amateur status. Hacking, duffing, slicing, and hooking critiques will be offered the preacher. It’s best then to consider how to receive them and benefit from them.

• Don’t be immediately defensive. Remember Solomon’s wise counsel: “Be more ready to hear.” At the very least, you know a criticism means that something did not sit well with the critic. It is wise to hear them and consider any validity to what they said. We are not infallible and another person may touch on some real need of improvement for us, regardless of how poorly they may do it.
• Don’t answer in kind. Express appreciation for their thoughts and your desire to consider and pray about what they have shared. It is not the time to respond with four things that are wrong with them. It is reflexive to respond that way, but we must subdue that urge if we are going to nourish a relationship that will bless both of us.
• Don’t take it too hard. Understand that some people are chronic complainers, unable to be satisfied with anything. Hear them and consider their words. If there is nothing valuable in them, let it go. Count them as words for the wind and remember them no more (Job 6:26).
• Don’t believe everything you hear. People criticize, but that doesn’t mean they are right. This also particularly applies to the praise we receive. When you receive praise, thank the Lord that they were blessed or helped and think no more on it. We also have to be careful to discern between praise and flattery. Both can be dangerous, but the latter is sinister.

When it comes to criticism or praise, it is best not to dwell on it too long. Sometimes you get the two-edged sword. I shook hands with a woman after a service and she said, “I really enjoyed your sermon.” I thought that was good, but she continued, “Of course, I knew all that already.” What do you do with that? Well, she did have a few years on me, so praise the Lord she’s down the road ahead of me and I am trying to catch up.

Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts. ~ James 4:3

Failure in Prayer

James describes us as lusting, killing, desiring, fighting, and warring to get what we want and yet we cannot obtain it (James 4:2). We will go to great lengths to obtain the things we desire. We will strive, work, sacrifice, and pursue with all that is in us and still the possession eludes us.

We Do Not Ask
James generalizes two failures in this case. The first is almost unthinkable. In verse 2, he describes people with a strong desire to obtain. Despite all their striving, they have not because they “ask not.” Think about how hard we work and to what lengths we go sometimes to get something and all the while we have never humbled ourselves before God and simply asked for it.

As unthinkable as it is, I find myself there far too often. I will work, scratch, and save. I will talk to people for their advice. I will read several books about it and yet I have neglected to simply and plainly ask God for it. How could this happen? How could I invest so much time and energy into something and never have asked God for it?

If we are being honest, we have to admit that none of us excel at prayer the way we should. James’ point makes it clear that something in our flesh does not relish prayer. There is something in us that would rather exhaust us completely and then turn to prayer as a last resort.

Have you ever had to do a job that you didn’t want to do? Have you ever done more work to get out of that job than if you would have just done it to begin with? We all have. Why? Because we did not like that task. We did not want to do it. It is the same with prayer. We have not because we ask not. We ask not because we don’t like to ask. We don’t like to pray. There is something in us that would rather do everything else first, and if that doesn’t work, then pray.

We Do Not Ask For The Right Things
The second failure is much easier to own. We ask and do not receive because we have asked for the wrong thing or for the wrong reason. When we are not concerned about God’s will, we just ask for that foolish and momentary desire to be given. Usually, in hindsight, we are very glad we weren’t given that request.

This failure is born of self-centeredness. We are not concerned about anyone or anything else but our own wants in the moment. In that moment, we are more concerned about our will being done than God’s. Consequently, we are not heard.

John wrote:

And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us; And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him.
~ 1 John 5:14-15

A Third Failure
Latent in this text is a third failure, and one we have more often than we think. Consider the verses near the close of chapter four.

Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain: Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away. For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.
~ James 4:13-15

If we think about this warning in context with the beginning of the chapter, we see the subtle point. We do not fail in prayer only when we have not, but also when we have.

Those addressed in the above verses have. They have the means to go into a city to abide, buy, sell, and get gain. They are chided for boasting that they will go without any consideration to God’s will, but this also suggests they are prayerless.

How often do we fail precisely the same way? We need a new appliance or article of clothing. We need a repair to our house or car. We have the money, so, Why would we pray about it? How many times do we check our bank account before, or without, checking with God.

If we are to “pray without ceasing” and to pray “always with all prayer and supplication,” Shouldn’t we pray when we have just as much as when we have not? Jesus prayed in John 11:41-42 to thank the Father for hearing Him, even though He knew that the Father always heard Him. This was not a waste of time nor a formality. Let us likewise pray and seek God when we have not and also when we have.

And he said unto him, If they hear not Moses and the prophets, neither will they be persuaded, though one rose from the dead. ~ Luke 16:31

Tales from the interstice of life and death.

Christian publishing is not so different from mainstream publishing in that they are always looking for the next big hit. It is a business after all and if there is no profit, there is no business, just a very expensive hobby. One book seems to be doing very well right now and no one knows how far it will go.

Heaven is for Real by Todd Burpo, Sonja Burpo, Colton Burpo, and Lynn Vincent was released in November 2010 by Thomas Nelson. At the time of this writing, it is listed on Amazon as #2 in books, #2 in Christian living, and #2 in eschatology. This book presents the account of the Burpo’s four-year-old son’s experience during an emergency surgery. He is purported to have passed from consciousness and entered Heaven. He is sent back and after surviving the surgery tells his family the things he has seen, heard, and knows.

Disclosure
Let’s deal with the disclaimers before we proceed. This is not a review of this book nor is it an analysis of its story. I have not read this book and most likely will not read it. One reason for that is that I am just not interested in these types of stories. They come along every so often. Some get into print and others spread by word of mouth.

I am not criticizing anyone else for reading it. I just cannot envision any scenario in which I will read it. This particular book is a conversation starter to address certain issues. My concerns are more general and categorical that this type of book is symptomatic of. Hopefully, that will make sense after I am finished.

The Clamor for Something Else
A certain demographic within American Christianity is always ready for this type of story. As a caveat: American Christianity is not the same as biblical Christianity, but we’ll leave that for another time. These folks are very heavy on experience and always ready to hear of dreams and visions and such.

They love to tell and hear about “what God is doing.” Interestingly, that talk does not include what God is doing in history to fulfill His purpose, nor how He is at work to reconcile to Himself, nor His governance of the universe to unfold according to His plan, nor even how He makes the small drops of water to fulfill His purpose and glorify His name (Job 36:28; Job 37:10-13). No, they are more concerned with what God is doing for them personally: how He is calming their storms, helping them face their giants, enlarging their borders, paying their mortgage, healing their planter’s warts, getting them into the car they want, and generally making them successful.

After a while around such people, you get the feeling their main concern is not for the Word of God, but something else. This sort of story appeals strongly because it is something else. They are not like the Psalmist who loved the law of God, meditated in it day and night, and desired it above earthly treasure (Psalm 119:97; Psalm 119:48; Psalm 119:127; Psalm 19:9-10). In a word, the Scripture is not sufficient for them. They want something else, something more.

I would recommend reading and considering John 6. There a multitude of people were following after Jesus. Though they stood in the presence of the Lord of Glory in human flesh, and though they had already seen mighty signs confirming His witness, they wanted more. They wanted something else (John 6:30-31). Those who majored on experience (John 6:26) were not satisfied with Jesus and wanted something more. When they did not get it, they went away and did not return (John 6:64-66).

A Good Sign
The popularity and success of such stories is a good sign to many. They are gladdened and take it as a sign that faith is alive and well in America. It restores their outlook and justifies great optimism. It is tantamount to an endorsement of what they are all about.

But let us come back to John 6 for a moment. According to Jesus, the clamor for something else did not manifest faith. It actually manifested the exact opposite, unbelief. It is not a heart of faith, love for God, and love for His Word that drives people to buy millions of copies of The Shack, or other categorically similar works. It is unbelief and a desire for something else, anything else, than the truth.

An Evangelistic Tool
Because of the popularity, many people will read these kinds of books who would otherwise neither buy nor read a “Christian” book. Savvy apologists will seize this fact to advance an ends-justifies-the-means argument. In other words, it’s an evangelistic tool and good for reaching where other methods might fail, says they. They reason that people in general are skeptical of religion and if they could hear the testimony of one who went there and could tell them of the experience, maybe they would believe.

Boy, that reminds me of something . . . ah yes, a true after-life experience in Luke 16. A rich man died and went to hell in unbelief. He wanted Lazarus, who died and went to Heaven, to be sent to his brothers to warn them that they would not die like he did (Luke 16:27-28). Abraham told him that they had the Word of God, i.e. Moses and the prophets, to warn them (Luke 16:29). The formerly rich man, who was still unbelieving, responded that that was not sufficient, they needed something else (Luke 16:30). Then Abraham gave him the final word on the matter.

And he said unto him, if they hear not Moses and the prophets, neither will they be persuaded, though one rose from the dead.
~ Luke 16:31

I don’t think these types of books are helpful and I don’t recommend them. If you go away from this post thinking I said anyone who reads this book, The Shack, or other similar books is not a real Christian, you missed the point. What is the point? Hold the Word of God, the Bible, in high regard (Job 23:12) and if you find you prefer something else, you need it all the more.

Lastly, Heaven is real and so is Hell. But don’t take my word for it. Take God’s Word for it.