Shutter Blossoms

My Gift - Poem

2017-02-06T21:05:00.000-05:00

~~Poetry~~ Writing does not come easy anymore, but once the dam breaks free my work is strong and unapologetic.

I still have plans to publish my poetry. I have so many plans...

Election Night - as told by a wild woman

2016-11-08T22:40:00.000-05:00

I've mulled this post in my head all day/evening and have finally decided to say, why the hell not...even if no one reads your posts, it's out of your head.

I voted today. This is really nothing new. I vote every time there is an election. Why? It's not that I feel I have a voice that can change the tide; though now that I think of it, I might! I vote because 100 years ago, as a woman I would have been fighting for this right. This same right that we all take for granted. I vote in honor of every woman who stood for equality. I vote because my 89 year old Grandmother (who still lives alone) has not voted in years, due to the fact "It's so hard to work the machines" No amount of reasoning will convince her otherwise. They however, cannot take away my voice. Had I been of age during the suffrage I'm sure jail would have been my permanent address.

But enough about history. The future is tonight. I don't care who you voted for, unless it was Darth Vader, then I'm just mad I didn't write him in myself.

If your candidate won, congratulations. If your candidate lost, I'm sorry. The only thing that will change tomorrow is the date on the calendar. Complaining about the other party winning/losing will only add to the division this country is experiencing. Don't gloat. Don't pout. Get your ass up and move on. That is what American's do best...work through the issue and move on to the next.

I stand a proud, wild woman because I voted.

Love,

Mika

I am home - last night's awakening

2015-11-05T13:01:00.000-05:00

I followed my mind, body and spirit last night. This is where it lead me.

Another 1 AM nightly commute home, after so many years I know the road in my sleep. Tired of hearing the same drabble of songs I turn off the radio. On any other night, the silence would have terrified me - my thoughts, worries and frustrations scream at me as soon as silence appears. Not this night. My eyes fixed on the road, the yellow and white lines slowly guiding me home. My mind…silent, the only noise I register is the hum of the tires rolling on the blacktop. My heart is nearly empty…like a sponge wrung out to dry, I can feel it solidify.

Out of my stillness, a voice spoke to me…one I knew well and have spent my life ignoring. “Only when you are quiet will you find peace.” I knew those words, I had said them to myself many times. However, to make myself quiet is frightening; suddenly self-doubt, pain, rage and hopelessness take over…peace withdraws.

“Quiet and still” the voice spoke. I took a deep breath and listened. “Do not reconnect the dots of your memories – they have broken for a reason. Focus on now, focus on your happiness.”

Easier said than done, even if this is coming from my inner spirit. “This mind has been heavy for too long…seek peace.”

When my vehicle stopped I had unknowingly driven to my childhood home; now empty. I let my feet direct me. Up the mountain side, in the still of this balmy November night I trekked to my favorite place. I reached the rocks, pulled my shoes off and stuck my feet in the cold creek bubbling beside me. My sense of hearing, touch and smell were guiding me to my destination… there was no need for sight.

“Embrace this moment. Allow your heart to fill with your first love…nature. Allow your mind to be inspired by the beauty. Allow your spirit to rise above the tree top. Do this and you shall be whole.” Her voice drifted from my mind…I fell to my knees, hearing the leaves crackle below me, feeling the earth hold me, and breathing in air for what seemed to be the first time. I embrace that which I had fought for so long. I am home.

Mika Buell

November 5, 2015

I'm back!

2015-06-30T22:35:00.001-04:00

Not many knew I was gone, but for better or for worse I am back!

"But Mika, where oh where have you been?"

I'll tell you my dear inquisitive friends. I have been here, there and everywhere. A traveling, writing, progressing wild woman as it were. I've spent hours, days and weeks hidden deep inside myself - looking for the core of Mika. I have emerged to claim 2015 has been the best year of my life in years. I celebrated a promotion I've been vying for and managed to keep my wits about me through some rocky times. I've spent most of this time...on the road.

Between a unforgiving winter, my parents farm and traveling, I have spent more hours behind the wheel than anywhere else (except sleeping of course!).

I leave you with photos - of course. I call this collection the long and winding road *cue The Beatles

My forever sidekick, Frida Kahlo. :)

Much love,

Mika

Margarita's Place

2014-03-30T23:47:00.000-04:00

Margarita has a place

at the corner of sorrow and regret

I visit her daily

under the neon lights and lonely guitar's howl

"Baby girl, you don't belong here" Margarita disapproves

"I belong nowhere if not in his arms." as I take my corner booth

She pats my shoulder and leaves me to the dark

Another night alone with a broken heart

Lesser men have tried

to sooth the pain

There is more behind a pretty face

But I'm just another bed post notch to their "game"

Margarita's place is where the lonely meet

To drown their anger in a poison of choice

Yet I take the darkest corner

Dying to forget the memory of his voice.

March 26, 2014

*note for artwork. Edgar Degas, L'Absinthe, 1876

New Years Day 2014 plus my word

2014-01-01T11:00:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year everyone! Also Happy Anniversary to my precious blog. The lifeline for my random mind. 2013 is finally OVER. I thought 2012 was rough...it can get much worse, trust me.

I'm ready to start 2014 with the beautiful souls I surround myself with. Over the past year I have cut several people out; my health and happiness has improved tremendously as a result. I plan on focusing on what is most important to me this year...my friends, boyfriend, writing and photography.

If you've read previous New Year posts you know I pick one word to describe what I want to feel/accomplish/change during the year. My first word (in 2012) was "Blossom". My art and writing did exactly that. 2013's word(s) "Move Forward" it literally took the entire damn year, but it happened. I'm happy to announce my word for 2014 is "Abundance"Cited

I have an abundance of love and creativity within me - all too often I take it for granted. When I look at my life right now, I'm thankful and humble at the abundance of positive influence everywhere I turn. I take nothing for granted, as I have just crawled out of Hell.

I love you all and I hope 2014 is your BEST year yet!

xoxox

Mika.

Famous dead men

2013-11-27T10:00:00.000-05:00


Edgar Allan Poe

A random moment of clarity...I've always been infatuated with famous dead men. After all these years I now know why...they cannot disappoint or hurt me.

Not only this, but I can know their life from beginning to (often tragic) end. Dead people are more intriguing to me than some that live.

Unless you're a lover of history or a deceased artist's work I do not expect you to understand.

Not even sure I do.

Ernest Hemingway

Egon Schiele

Edgar Degas

Ezra Pound

Oskar Kokoschka

2014 Calendar

2013-10-23T11:00:00.000-04:00

I'm excited to announce my first photography calendar for 2014 - featuring 12 of my favorite photos over the past 3 years. Check out the calendar preview below and visit Lulu.com - the ONLY site the product is officially available on!

After the year is up frame your favorite prints and be on the lookout for 2015's calendar. :)

Enjoy!

Mika

Random act of self-kindness

2013-09-17T20:23:00.000-04:00

Today I committed what can only be called a random act of self-kindness. I bought myself a bouquet of daisies. We all deserve to treat ourselves with the same kindness we grant others. I practice self-love (yes, failing is part of practice...you practice to get better at it) we must first love ourselves before we can whole-heartily love others.

I have something amazingly fantastic in the works but I'm keeping it under wraps for now. Just know you'll see these photos again soon.

Love,

Mika

PS: I was also inspired to do a mini photo shoot with my Tiny Buddha today. Shameless advertising - buy the print here!

The Paris Wife and the complications of life

2013-07-21T17:03:00.003-04:00

Today I finally finished "The Paris Wife" by Paula McLain. I asked for the book our last Christmas together and bought it for myself after the separation. Knowing Ernest Hemingway's history, I knew Hadley was his first wife - first of many. My heart would not allow my head to finish the story...to see it through because I have a personal connection.

I cried myself through the last 5 chapters, re-reading emotions. The underlying message that Hadley told herself...the same message I tell myself. "What is done, is done. No one knows what tomorrow will bring but you must be present."

Yesterday I watched a childhood friend marry. I saw the love, happiness and desire in her pink cheeks and bright blue eyes. I wept tears of joy for her; and tears of sorrow for myself. Selfish? Definitely. Stupid? Probably. But completely honest with myself? Yes.

Life is complicated with moments of happiness and moments of sadness.

Quote from the book...Hadley to Ernest:

"We'll always be friends - delicate friends, and I'll love you 'til I die, you know."

He gave me this our first Christmas together. I gave it back months ago. Memories hurt but are nessecary at times.

This post is dedicated to Hadley Richardson, Ernest Hemingway and Thomas.

My own strength

2013-07-10T10:00:00.000-04:00

It's been months...too many months and too many emotions to even try to explain my seclusion. It's been a long transition (that ~~I suspect~~ will never end) and looking back at my last post to now...I've come a long way. The Mika typing at this very second is not the mopy self-centered person the first of April.

There are things in this life I want/need and know how to get them. "To thine own self be true" - Shakespeare's words are etched in my mind. Not everyone will agree with me...hell I figure a few will try to shame me but I'm not living for anyone else anymore. People will let you down time and time again...I refuse to let myself down; anymore.

With a deep breath I give you insight to the true Mika. This is my first (of many) steps. I am ready.

Lilith

I am from Lilith
I am made of clay
An equal to any man
I am my own being

The air in my lungs
And the thoughts in my mind
Are filled with serenity
Free to roam the winds of time

I am from Lilith
I am from the clay
My knowledge is my worth
Not the ring on my finger

I am not to be conquered
I am not to be controlled
If I love you - it is freely
With all the passion I hold

I am from Lilith
I am not beneath you anymore
I choose my own destiny
With wisdom to be adored.

* All rights are reserved by the author Mika Buell.

With love and my own strength,

Mika

Easter Sunday

2013-04-02T03:02:00.001-04:00

I've went through a lot of "Firsts" over the past 6 months. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Birthday, Valentine's Day and now Easter. Thankfully my parents have been there for all of them...though it's not the same. I didn't expect it to be.

After my Father's Easter Sunday Sermon - that I didn't attend...(yeah, I'm a Preacher's Daughter) I spent the evening with my parents. Things have changed there over the past year. So much that no one really speaks. I sat with them for 6 hours in near silence. Life has changed drastically.

Though I don't attend Church I wanted to at least look nice for the family.

Another "first" holiday to mark off the calendar.

I'm happy to welcome Spring - not as excited to welcome April.

With love,

Mika

Ophelia - poem

2013-01-20T18:38:00.001-05:00

Credits

"Ophelia" by Sir John Everett Millais 1851

Ophelia

Ophelia whispers to me
the songs of sorrow
the sound of madness
the breaking of a woman’s heart

In winter clover I find her
leaning the direction of the wind
eyes soft and smiling
her wild blonde hair flowing in circles

With an angelic voice so pure and white
she sighs, “I wish to forget last night.”
“These men are all the same.”
“These men are all to blame.”

Embracing her fragile frame
I wish to give her all of my strength
to clear her mind of the mud
and find her own voice once more.

Ophelia please find the joy
that I know you have buried deep
after a lifetime of servitude,
please have courage

Ophelia leads me to the river
singing with the birds
gracefully dancing to her own tune
laughing all the while

With an angelic voice so pure and white
she screams, “I regret nothing of last night!”
“These men are all to blame!”
“Now every man will remember my name!”

Catching her reflection from the water
a single tear runs down her cheek.
“Dear one, this is my courage.
This is the voice that cannot speak”

As she floats along the current
Ophelia echoes to me
“Take the last breath from me,
for I - am free.”

Copyright Mika Buell-Joseph 2013

Credit
"Ophelia" by Elle Moss

24 Hours - My Trip to Roanoke, VA Part 2

2013-01-08T18:11:00.000-05:00

Welcome to part 2 of my 24 hours in Roanoke, VA. This post is solely dedicated to Taubman Museum of Art! I simply have too many photos and want to take the time to break down the area and the experience I had so that others will have a better idea of the area/interests. I've received some very awesome feedback on my first post - which you can read here. If you enjoy these posts please let me know and feel free to share! Again, thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to enter my wacky world.

Much love!

For those of you that do not know me personally - I feel like I'm at an AA meeting. Hello my name is Mika and I'm an art addict. Taubman Museum of Art is only one of many museums in Roanoke. I chose Taubman's while I was researching the area. They simply offered more of what I wanted to see!

As with most museums photography was not allowed in 90% of the areas. For those areas I will link directly to their website.

Welcome to Roanoke!

Taubman Museum of Art

This unusual Nylon floating sculpture greets every guest at the museum. Hand sewn by artist Anne Ferrer - "Hot Pink" is suspended 20 feet in the air, giving the rather masculine architectural design a more feminine and rather whimsical feel.

Art Venture was the first area I visited inside the museum. It was inspiring to watch the children reading/painting and opening their beautiful creative minds!

I took this photo for Tamara. :)

Matching Anne Ferrer sculpture from the lobby.

"Un-usual Folk" Exhibit

Artist: Unknown

Left: "Quilting Memory Painting by Helen La France

Right: "Self Portrait" by Mose Tolliver

Artist: Unknown

This painting was my favorite of all the "Folk Art"
Artist: Theresa Disney

These were the most unusual pieces. "Buster in Cage 2004" by Marvin Francis who is incarcerated in North Point Training Facility, KY. The most amazing part - they were made with materials Mr. Francis had access to in the facility. Proving you can literally make something from nothing!

Also on exhibit when I visited:

Faberge collection - over 100 separate pieces collected from 1899-1917 ranging from cigarette holders to crystal stamp viewers. Most were originally owned by Tsar Nicholas II.

Judith Leiber Handbags - over 100 crystal handbags. Simply beautiful.

Edward Burtnysky- Collection called "Oil" Mr. Burtnysky shows us in full detail the impact we make on the Earth and on one another. An absolutely beautiful photography collection worth viewing!

American Art from the Permanent Collection - Of course this exhibit was my of my favorite if for no other reason than I was able to view amazing American Impressionists paintings. I love Impressionism and was thrilled to have the honor of gazing upon such strong pieces from a lost era.

State of the Art: Virginia Crossroads - A vast collection of artists from the area (and around Virginia) ranging from sculptures to photography and everything in between. I spent more time in this section than I realized, mainly due to the fact the guard talked me to death! lol

Harold Little - A wonderful painter and Printmaker

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That's it folks! If you enjoyed my little review please let me know!

Street art outside of the museum. Buy the print here.

There you have it. If you enjoyed my review please let me know! I can't wait to do another one!

Happy New Year 2013

2013-01-01T10:00:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year everyone! I must say I'm thrilled to see 2012 come to an end. Hands down the second worst year of my life...only proceeded by 2009 when I lost my brother. I've been dating everything 2013 this weekend...my mind, body and soul are all ready!

Every year we make resolutions that we don't keep. I accept that the only resolution I've kept is this blog and as of late I've only half-assed that. I am now in year 3 as of today. Happy Anniversary to Shutter Blossoms and all my readers who stuck through some crazy shit.

2013 I am NOT making a resolution. Time to air dirty laundry...for those of you out of the loop, my husband and I separated a few months back. Since this time my motto has been "Move Forward" and that's just what I'm going to CONTINUE to do this year. By the way, I'm not using it because it was Obama's slogan this year. I was saying it before it was cool! I have no other option but to move forward and I do so with a smile.

Credit

So here is to a new year with new possibilities. I hope you will continue to join me through the ups and downs. I promise it to be entertaining.

What are your New Years resolutions? Have you ever kept them?

Happy New Year. Be safe!!!!

Love,

Mika.

30 Days to Fill Your Cup

2012-11-30T02:16:00.000-05:00

I realize I spend most of my time banging away at the letters on the keyboard but never really accomplish anything useful in the end. Tonight I manged to pull inspiration down from the Heavens and let my soul pour out in words. I'm always in awe of how something simple can change your perspective.

I'll be honest. I'm not making a dime from sharing this link...that's not why I'm doing it. I discovered "30 Days to Fill Your Cup" through the gentle soul of Amanda Fall - Sprout Magazine. She shared the link and I knew coming from Amanda it was worth my time! After reading all you receive in 30 days I had to join immediately. The best part is it's free. Amy Lee Czadzeck is a wonderful person to do this! Quoted from the site:

Fill Your Cup is a 30 day practice. Each day you will receive one loving email to your inbox. Each email will invite you to DO something for yourself as well as a practice to just BE.

Needless to say I was sold! I encourage anyone who realizes it's time to take care of YOU to join!

Again, providing the link/background is not paying me anything - but to know I believe in this so strong that I want to share it with my beautiful readers and possibly make a difference in your life is more rewarding than money could ever be.

This was my introduction to the group. The entire reason for this blog post. I made great strides tonight in my journey just by writing this:

My intention is to continue moving forward with loving the person I am/will become. It's a long difficult road, but I know I will go above and beyond - which makes me push even harder. I could not pass up a chance to fill my cup for 30 days. There has never been a better time in my life to do so and I'm thankful to be here with all of your beautiful souls. ♥

For more info/sign up - click here

With much love,

Mika

PS comments/shares are always welcome

Poem - Kiss

2012-11-20T22:30:00.000-05:00

Some things you cannot kiss better
like a bleeding heart
broken memories
and me

I've lived through your kisses
to tell the tale of sorrow
-such an unsightly scar

Your lips sealed my tomb
as you left me in darkness
my heart will not chance
another unmarked grave

A lifetime cannot heal
these kisses
our memory

-or this girl.

Mika Buell-Joseph 2012

"Kiss of Death" by *michellemonique

24 Hours - My Trip to Roanoke, VA Part 1

2012-11-15T09:00:00.000-05:00

A girl can accomplish a lot in 24 hours - especially a girl with a camera and time all on her own. I had 4 days off this week and knew I couldn't stand to stay alone so I reserved a solo slot for an overnight trip to Roanoke, VA. Everyone has asked me, "Why Roanoke?" Why not? It's less than 5 hours away and is quite an amazing place. When I say everyone has asked me..I do mean everyone; including (but not limited to) the Virginia police officer who pulled me over.

I would be doing the world a huge misfortune if I didn't share this story with you all. If you're not interested then by all means scroll on down...but you're gonna regret it. While I'm at it; disclaimer for foul language. ;)

Nearly 20 miles from my hotel exit an unmarked car flashed their lights and stopped me on I-81. Now in my head: I'm wearing my seat belt, not speeding, not on the phone/texting, both hands on the wheel and the music playing low...what the fuck does this guy want? He strolls up to my passenger window doing the big macho man knock on the side of the vehicle (I guess to see if it was hollow) he asked the usual, how are you, where are you heading etc...finally he says, "I pulled you over because I'm pretty sure your windows are too dark." Wait...what? I'm puzzled at this point. "I think they're probably too dark for Kentucky too. I'm just going to give you a warning. May I see your license and registration" of course I obey.

After running me (which I'm sure he was disappointed in wasting his time doing all this shit) he brings back my ID and uses a little meter device to see how dark my windows are. While the meter is testing he says, "Virginia state law is anything below 15." We both look at the meter and at each other. My reading? 14! "So I'm under the law?" I questioned as I smiled. "Yes, it says you are." Knowing you're in the right, especially when it comes to a prick of a officer is the best feeling in the world. He then questions why I'm going to Roanoke for one day...I did not have to explain a damn thing to him but I have nothing to hide. I told him I was a photographer (and pointed to the camera bag in the floor) and wanted to get away. I live just a few hours away and didn't think it was a crime to spend the night one state away from home. Of course his reply was, "I work with the crime and drug task force and that's why I was asking" "Oh, so you think I'm smuggling drugs from Kentucky? Really?" "Ma'am, have you ever been in trouble?" "Didn't your little scan on me already tell you this? No. In fact I now have paper work to fill out when I return to work for talking to you...you gave me more work over nothing." "But I didn't give you a ticket or warning..." After I informed him in much more detail what I meant, he changed his tune quick. Needless to say, I was "Free to go" and he hoped I "enjoy your stay"...I was so pissed I didn't think to get his name. I know cops get a bad rap because of douche bags like him, but he really was just an asshole who tried to push the wrong girl.

Luckily things got better after that :)

I stayed at Holiday Inn Express & Suites in Salem, VA. Crazy that a double room was cheaper than a single, but a room is a room to me!

I want the bathroom lights!

I made reservations for one at the fancy steakhouse in downtown Roanoke. Call me Lily Davenport from now on. :) The dress code was "Business casual" so I played.

Me or should I say "Lily" :)

The place was called Frankie Rowland's Steakhouse and it was much more laid back and comfortable than I ever expected. My reservation was for 7:45 and I couldn't have picked a better time in terms of crowd. There were groups everywhere. I didn't allow myself to feel out of place for being alone. It's something I'm getting used to and if I'm to travel (like I dream) I have a feeling I will be doing it a lot.

I asked the hostess for permission to photograph a few things in the restaurant to write about, this was obviously an odd request as she asked her manager. Needless to say I was allowed! My server was Stephani and I could not have asked for a better one! I told her off the bat about my plans and she went to great lengths to assist me.

I had originally requested Split Chicken Breast with Rosemary Beurre Blanc but Stephani came back in a tizzy...for they had ran out of chicken due to a large party in the back. This turned out to be in my favor because I spoiled myself with an appetizer.

Artisan Cheese Plate (three cheese) I ate nearly everything on the platter!

My salad: Sliced Beefstake Tomatoes, Fresh Mozzarella and Balsamic Reduction

Every thing was fresh and flavorful. Tamara had mentioned the salad when I linked her the menu so after the chicken fiasco I knew it was meant to be!

My water never ran low, my table cloth was cleaned after each plate and I was thanked by every employee as I left. To have randomly picked a place to dine I really lucked up.

Be on the lookout for Part 2 this weekend!

PS: This is my 200th blog post!

Never fall in love

2012-10-31T11:46:00.001-04:00

My Wednesday words of wisdom...never fall in love with a musician. They will only break your heart.

Even Lucy agrees.

Mid-October in Grams

2012-10-18T09:00:00.000-04:00

It's been far too long and I know it! You come to a point in your life (as a blogger) where sharing certain aspects of your personal life is damn near impossible. Those of you who care; the simplest explanation - the life I knew is gone, and now I am exploring the world through different eyes. Want more of an explanation, you know how to contact me!

October has been a festive month indeed. Face painting at work thanks to my wonderful friend Tamara. Lots and lots of trees. I do live in Kentucky!

Enjoy mid-October in grams!

Follow @mikaj115

Review: Daring Greatly by Brené Brown

2012-09-20T09:00:00.000-04:00

After devouring "Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown I was amazed at how much of a role vulnerability and shame play in my life. From her opening excerpt of Theodore Roosevelt's thunderous speech "Citizenship in a Republic" to her personal experiences with shame and vulnerability Brené shoves the mirror in your own face and makes you take a hard look at who you are and how you react to situations.

Dr. Brené Brown has spent over a decade researching/interviewing and experiencing all types of shame and vulnerability that keep us from getting into the arena and daring greatly.

I was very thankful to receive this book...as some of you know I suffer from depression and anxiety. We all have personal demons or "gremlins" as she calls them. So many passages had me shaking my head to agree and are now highlighted as references when I start to hear my "gremlins" telling me "Your idea is stupid" or "No one loves you" she calls this "Vulnerability Resilience".

She provides excerpts from other professionals/artists/writers who are daring greatly and makes every day references (everything from Harry Potter to Leonard Cohen) I can honestly say I had my doubts at first, I was worried I wouldn't be able to follow along, but when I say it's an easy read...I mean you will understand the information she is providing to help you.

No matter what situation you find yourself in or what bothers you deep down, this book is a great reminder that the human spirit is so much more than the toxic words we tell ourselves and unfortunately (sometimes) tell others.

I highly recommend this book to everyone - men, women and teens alike. I've already taken my first step into the arena and am daring greatly...when will you?

*This is a paid review for BlogHer Book Club but the opinions expressed are my own.

If you would like to join the discussion, head over to the BlogHer Book Club and share with the community!

Letter to 17 Year Old Me

2012-09-11T23:35:00.005-04:00

This was not an easy post for me to write. Self evaluation 11 years later.

Dear 17 year old Mika,

Darling you think you know it all but you have so much to learn. The bad experiences you have faced thus far are the beginning of a tidal wave that no one can control. Don't worry, there are plenty of good times to be had.

There are so many things I would have told you...so many times I would have kicked your ass for your words and actions.

Learn to let go.
Learn to dance-you loved ballet as a child but you're better at watching it in the crowd. Learn to tango or waltz. You might think it's dorky now but some day you'll wish you had.
Stick with your writing. A 4 year hiatus is not a wise choice after all.

Stop over-analyzing every aspect of your life, it will only cause you grief later.
Learn to love yourself. I know you at 17 are your worst enemy. People around you can and will pollute your mind to try to mold you into something you simply cannot be. Since the day you were born they have been trying this...don't let them win. Stand up and fight for who you are.

Think before you react. Your temper and hate for the world will only lead you down a path that takes nearly a decade to recover from.

Tell those closest to you how much you care - some of them will pass away, some will move away and some you push away. A handful will stick around but one you will hurt so much they are never the same again.

Take chances.
Take time to enjoy the moment. Turns out everyone is right, the little things matter the most.
Visit your siblings more...before it's too late.
Winter Snowball is the night your life changes forever. Remember the Christmas tree lights and being safe in his arms.
Save money. This is still a hard principle a decade later.

Ask Mom to teach you to sew. She will be thrilled and you will have a head start on mending clothes!
Oh and while you're at it, have her teach you to make homemade biscuits and gravy (your husband loves them and it's the one thing you can't make)
Buy the darkroom set!
I know we're all about film, but it's ok to accept digital as another outlet of photography. Granted in 2001 your basic digital camera is crap...give it a few years. You will still appreciate film!
Take better care of your music collection.
Take better care of you - I'm still working towards this.
Stop pouting. Stop crying. Start living.

I want to tell you to be happy, but it's just not that simple. Find the right balance and rise above your depression. Rise above your negative thoughts. Talk. Get help. Life will not go as planned, but through the detour you will find peace and surround yourself with some amazing friends.

I guess what I'm trying to say baby girl is don't hide away. Be you. Embrace every aspect of your life and you will live to tell the tale.

Sincerely,
28 year old Mika.

Senior Prom 2002

Future husband <3

7 Questions (#21)

2012-09-05T19:12:00.000-04:00

I am finally brave enough to share in the 7 questions from Gentri Lee.

Funny picture of the week: a oldie but a goodie. Senior year of High School, 2001. My best friends Beth, Lynz and I randomly advertising for a Mexican drink. I miss those days and those girls!

1. I say "Jump" You say ______.

2. What is your favorite flower?
Currently; white orchids

Credit

3. If you had to choose between having plumbing or electricity, which would you choose?

Plumbing - though I'd prefer to have both!

4. What is your go-to funny youtube video? (keep 'em clean)

5. Do you think dreams mean something?

Sometimes - I can see how people become superstitious from dreams due to coincidence.

6. Do you collect anything?

Vintage cameras, art, bottles, magazines, books and anything else I can find lol

7. You're in a situation that is everything it should be. You're with the right people, in the right place, doing the right things, but it doesn't "feel" right... What do you do?

Just because everything is as it should be doesn't make it right. I would leave. The older I get the more I come to terms it's ok to be selfish. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it.

There you go kids. 7 answers from my crazy mind. Got a blog? Answer the 7 questions and link up at Gentri Lee.

Calling all local 2013 Seniors

2012-08-21T22:44:00.001-04:00

Garnet Photography (AKA me) is looking for a local area High School Senior to volunteer to model for the 2013 graduating class!

In return for your hard work you will receive:
20 wallets
6 5x7
4 8x10

For two poses of your choice! A total savings of $200 for free!

Official Rules:

Contest is only applicable to current Seniors attending Bell County High School, Pineville Independent, Middlesboro Independent, Knox Central High School, Cumberland Gap High School and Claiborne High School.

All eligible students must apply before October 1, 2012. After this date new applications will not be accepted.

Think you have what it takes? Follow the link below and answer the questions prompted before October 1, 2012.

Good luck to you all and please share!!!!

Mika

I am here

2012-08-01T00:17:00.000-04:00

There are things. Millions of things that I could blog about. Things that are related to current events. Things that are related to my lack of posting. Things that could give you a sliver of insight to the craziness that is my life. But you see, these things are personal. These things do not help one grow...only hinder happiness. I'm tired of focusing on the past. This week has marked the beginning of a new chapter in my life.

From this moment on, I move forward.

The clutter is being swept away with desires and plans for A future. See, that's the thing about "future" there will be one. It might not be what you expected, or what you thought at the time was right...but you are on the right path. It's your life. LIVE IT.

I will no longer deny ideas. If I want to try something, I will do it - even if it's alone. 28 years of living to please everyone else has left me hollow and deformed. Yes, I'm selfish. Shouldn't everyone be? Does the Declaration of Independence not state we all have the right of "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" who's happiness? YOURS. Be selfish. I am no longer planning my joy around someone else.

No more stepping stone. No more referee. No more roommate. If you want to be a part of my life, I expect 2 things (as should everyone else);
1. Make the effort
2. Give me room to grow

If you want to be in my life, be there. No negativity. No narcissism. Just be there.

I am here. Where are you?

Don't call it a sunset, baby...Night is now day.