single, korean, and working

It's not worth it because you're worth it!

케이윤 — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 13:13:29 -0700

It's not always the big things that bother you. Or at least it's not always the big things that bother me. There many small things that can bother me. However, they don't bother me individually. It's only when they come in a good size group.

No, let me rephrase this. It's more like this. For the first few of these, you don't even know what hit you. You kind of go "hmm" and move on. After a few, you feel the build up. After a few more, you have reached the threshold point. These things are dangerous because they sneak behind you. You don't know if they are coming to get you until they have started eating you up. Another bad thing about these is that unless someone around you are exposed to similar number of similar things, you can't vent to other people.

Ah, yes, venting. And we should never and ever under-estimate the power of venting. Really, it is not all that different from venting, when you go see a therapist and pay him/her big money. They are just there to hear you venting and at a very high cost. (Maybe that's not true... what do I know, I've never sought a therapist, but maybe it's time that I do)

So where were we? Oh yes, venting. It is hard to vent about how these things that started bothering you to others because if they are not exposed to them they don't understand. I mean, they just wouldn't be able to get it. Maybe, you can illustrate to them one or two incidents with great passion, and while you are speaking to them, maybe you feel your body getting warm and your blood pressure rising and your face getting read. But your family or friend (who is kind enough to be in front of you and listening to you) may just not get it. Maybe if you tell them over and over and day after day, day after night, then maybe they will get it. Because after a few sessions, they would have been gaining some understanding of the situation, how it is being evolved and how this evolution of the given circumstance is totally bothering you.

So what can I do? What can we do?

A few ideas,

1. Pick a hobby, any hobby that can keep your mind off when you are not under the irritating circumstances. You need a break. You need to keep your mind off. I know it's hard but maybe with the help of a very good addicting hobby maybe you can do that.

2. Vent vent and vent to your loved ones. I know it just doesn't sound right to put your loved ones in suffering but I am sure the consequence of not taking earlier action could be even more severe (and possibly costly). So I strongly urge that we all vent to someone who knows us very well and are patient enough to hear through the first view venting sessions.

3. This one, I find it, is the ultimate goal. This is where we should aim for (but much easier said than done) is we just lighten up. Don't let them bother you. Don't let them eat you up. Find inner peace. At the end of the day, none of them are worth the agony. You know why? It's because we are all worth it.

So there they are. The ways for us to cope with these daily frustrations from small things. I know I should thrive for No. 3 but we all know this is very very difficult. But it doesn't hurt to try eh? Because we are all worth it.

Cheers to everyone!

miss K

the Questions of the Confused One

케이윤 — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 11:04:21 -0700

Are you happy today? Do you feel the sense of fulfillment? Are you content with where you are in your life?
I ponder the above questions almost everyday. No, scrap that, I ponder the above a few times a day especially these days. Am I the only one? I hope not. I don't want to be the only one around here who feels pretty lost. I, the thirty something professional who's supposed to be a pretty clever one, am lost in life.

What makes me happy? I am not sure.
Why don't I have answers to any of my questions?
Maybe it's time to ask me different questions.

What do I like to do?
Where do I want to be?
What's important in my life?

For sure, everything I do don't make me feel miserable right? I must do some things that I enjoy.

Maybe I am just spoiled. Yeah maybe that's what it is. I got my education and I got a secure job and I got a good boyfriend (who is often too busy for me :( )... my family.... hmmm... they are supportive of me but my family does have a share of problems.... my parents are well off enough that I don't have to support them. I am not married and I don't have any kids...

So in summary, I just have to be responsible for ME and MY HAPPINESS.

If I were married with kids and were to take care of my parents, then maybe I wouldn't have been able to afford time to ask and ponder about these questions. But since I am single and makes decent money and not too sure about my current job, maybe it is a natural thing for me to seek "MORE" in life?

Or am I just missing whatever that I am missing?
Where am I? What is this confusion that I find myself right in the middle of?

- missK (aka kooljaek)

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What color is your parachute?

케이윤 — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 22:23:57 -0700

A few months after I received my master's degree, I started working. It's been a bit longer than 5 years and in that 5 years, I have taken on many different positions. Even when I am a trained structural engineer, I've always thought there was more.

More?

What's more? Do I even know what kind of "MORE" I'm looking for?

So I started listing things that could kinda describe me. Not that it would really tell me anything specific but at least I thought this way, I might be able to get a better idea about myself.

Here are a few:

- hates taking orders from people whom I can't respect
- loves doing something new and creative
- loves colors
- is not very athletic
- loves meeting new people
- would love to see different places
- loves galleries, classical concerts, shopping
- loves to go to school but loves to complain at the same time
- maybe I am just someone who just has to complain
- currently not too content with my job
-
-
-

The list could go on. But does it really tell me something?

I was out in a meeting with a colleague of mine at a Coffee Shop (yes, it was a business meeting, really!), and I took the liberty to vent out to him. Because I knew I could trust him... I knew that he would listen... I knew he would tell me some stories from his experience that I can relate to.

So he told me about the book titled, "What Color Is Your Parachute?" He said he read it when he was confused about his career and it enlightened him a bit.

I went back to the office after the meeting. I called up my boyfriend and vented to him again. After work, I went to the book store and got a copye of "What Color Is Your Parachute ?: A Practical Manual for Job-Hunters and Career-Changers."

I am NOW officially a 30 something professional with a master's degree who is completely confused about what she should do with her career with a twenty some dollar worth career guide.

I guess I will have to read this first to figure out what are "Parachutes" before I get to figure out what color mine should be.

- miss K

[Image from Amazon.com]

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Welcome to Single, Korean, and Working by miss K!!!

케이윤 — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 14:01:32 -0700

Alright alright,

I have attempted to run an English blog for myself many many time before and I failed as many times as I tried. In fact, I didn't really try too much to keep it going. I would have 1 or 2 postings and no readers! And you, yes you reading this posting, would know how important it is to have readers and some interactions with the readers. Maybe not all bloggers want readers but at least for me, that interaction is what makes blogging fun!

Please allow me to introduce myself. I have been a blogger for quite some time but mainly been blogging in Korean which is my mother tongue. It's kind of funny how this blogging has become a part of my life because I used to HATE... and when I say this, it is really in capital letters, HATE writing. But now I love it, which still doesn't mean I am any good at it. I blog about anything and everything but in "Single, Korean, and Working (SKaW)" I would like to focus on the following categories

1. Single - Life
- Technically I am not single because I have a boyfriend but I am not married. Postings in this category will be about anything about single life style (some call people like me, Yuppie but, I don't really consider myself one).

2. Korean - Culture
- Yes, culture... it is a bit vague, eh? As I am an 1.5 generation Korean Canadian, I often find myself completely lost in some where in the middle of pacific. Under this category, I would like to focus on any cultural, global issues (not that I am really upto date with current affairs).

3. Working - Career
- That's right. I am a working gal! I went to school for too long and I have been working for too too long. But in some sick and twisted ways, I have this love and hate relationship with my work. I am trained as an engineer but I love to jump around and do different things as much as possible within the industry. Here, I will share the lessons learned and some anecdotes from work work work!

So that's it for now.

I hope you get to enjoy this blog as much as I will.

Till then, ciao!

miss K
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