GISTDOTCOM!!!

WOK'CHOP : PARTY JOLLOF RICE !!!

2012-02-18T06:47:00.001Z

There's a reason people fight for party jollof rice at events especially weddings! Everybody wan do take away, why? because home made rice is not the same with party rice. There's something. Do you know the koko? I'll show you the koko. This is easy to make and you don't need plenty senrenren to cook it. You don't even need firewood! I will warn you in advance to do your cooking with non-stick pans if not prepare to scrub your pot after cooking. Special thanks to my friend Dee who showed me the way...

Scroll down for recipe

Ingredients

Tomatoes

Fresh Pepper

Onions

Vegetable Oil

Rice

Peas (optional)

Tatashe

Knorr

Thyme

Curry

Salt

Method

Blend fresh pepper, tomatoes, tatashe, onions till very smooth and then boil it till it is almost dry, like tomato puree.
Cook your beef/chicken with your desired spices and fry thereafter
The vegetable oil used to fry the beef, pour it into your cooking pot, add chopped onions, little knorr seasoning and fry till the onion is soft.
Add the tomato paste to the hot oil and fry on low heat, add your knorr, thyme, a bit of curry and continue stirring till the 'stew' is cooked
When the sauce is cooked (you can tell because the oil will settle on top the tomato paste), add water plus any stock you have to the paste and mix, enough water to cook the rice. Add knorr.
Wash the rice and our into the pot, with a wooden spatula, aka omorogun aka tuni garri mix the d rice and 'stew' and taste for salt, if it is not enough, add some more. Don't per boil the rice.
Cover the pot, increase the heat and let it buuuurn, let it buuuurrrn, let it buuurrrrrn (in Usher's voice)
Don't be worried if the rice is burning, that is the 'KOKO'!
Err...don't sha let it burn too much. Wisdom is principal.
When the rice is almost cooked, reduce the heat so that it can simmer in the awesomeness of the burnt bottom pot.
At this point you can add garden peas if you wish...and allow it to steam.

P.S : If you tried this recipe, let me know how it goes.

SERVE AND WASH THE POT!!!

I Will Always Love Yoooooouuuuuu

2012-02-12T09:48:00.002Z

I have never been emotional because of a celebrity but I did cry for Whitney Houston...I will always love her. Here's my Whitney TOP TEN. Whitney was my FAVE EVER, she didn't have to go naked for people to appreciate her music, that is TALENT!!!

What are your Whitney Favorites???

Call Me Bond...

2012-02-07T19:30:00.001Z

Hello my lovely people,how market? (don't mind me, just random, lol). So I have gist...story story...

Last Saturday I started a new course in Internal Communications (yay!) so I had to go to London to take the class, when I reach there the tutor say make we introduce oursef, and he started with me-why oh why! I had that awkward moment where I didn't know what to say...and then i went...*gulp*My name is yemi so&so, graduated in so&so, working as a kini at so&so for the past 3 months. I cleared my throat and siddoned.

The next woman started with "my name is Mary, CEO so&so, 23 years in the Comms Industry". Next dude, "hi, Alan, Director so&so, 15 years in the industry"..."Kim, Manager so&so enterprises for 25 years"...and na so all of them introduce demselves. My self esteem just drop ...the work wey I dey do nor even relate to the course, dem kon dey wonder wetin I dey do there...lol. Even me I kon dey wonder...if no be me start the introduction I for don come up with something like...."CEO Gistdotcom, Manger so&so in Nigeria"...Oh well, nothing spoil. God dey.

On my back home, I was at bond station,holding my heavy textbooks, waiting for the train and thinking about my life when I noticed one black guy, he was well dressed with suitcase sef, like pesin wey just dey from office. Omoguy close eye, dey hum to music without earphones and he dey march. Odd I thought...but in this London nothing is odd-the weather too cold for krase man to pull cloth waka naked-their krase get level. So the omoguy kept marching and humming with eyes closed towards the platform...and I was looking...he was marching...I was looking and like joke na GBOINGGG! I hear, omoguy fall inisde the train track and a train was approaching...

I dumped my bags, books plus the new shoe wey I buy and got into the tracks along with another man to help take him out, another lady helped too, the crowd just dey hala...'OMG' WTF'...I thought to myself 'na dat one we dey talk?...c'mon come and help use to carry this omoguy'...the guy just heavy like pesin wey chop 2 buckets of akpu. I dey use my corner eye dey spy my load wey I drop...I can't shout. We carried him out just in time as the train approached.

What was weird tho, was that this omoguy dusted himself, carried his suitcase and stood as normal as if nothing happened...!!!The station officials finally arrived and I pointed...'that is the guy that fell in'...shuo, cos dem kon dey tink say na me or the other bros wey help naim fall. Abeg oh.. LOL. It was when I left the station I thought...Oh my! I just helped to save a man's life and I began to feel cool, and my head began to swell, and swell, and swell...abeg make una help me hold am. lol

So from henceforth call me BOND...Yemmie BOND

STOP!!! Have you seen this video???

2012-02-02T22:50:00.001Z

If you haven't, you should!

I LIKE...ALOT!

WOK'CHOP: Vegetable Stew With Spinach!

2012-01-29T23:00:00.004Z

Hello lovely people, I'm starting this years posting with food update. I'm sharing my vegetable stew recipe which cooks in 20 minutes if you are multi-tasker like me; rice on one hob, beef on another hob, boiling water on a 3rd hob!

Scroll down for the recipe

Ingredients

Chopped peppers

Chopped tomatoes

Chopped onions

Chopped beef

Chopped Spinach

Vegetable Oil

Salt

Knorr

Method

Spice and boil beef till tender...allow it to cook till the stock/broth is very little and thick- like 2 teaspoon fulls.
Heat up vegetable oil and add chopped onion, add little knorr seasoning.
When the onion is soft and transparent, add the beef and let it fry a little;do not add water so it does not become runny, just add the teaspoon full of broth.
Do not cover the pot, use a WOK preferably, that's what I used.
Add the mixture of chopped pepper and tomatoes. Drain the pepper and tomato before frying it so that the stew does not get too watery.
Taste for salt, and add more if it's not tasty enough...I leave the salt till later because the broth is concentrated with spices...you do not want your food too salty.
Stir until cooked...
Add spinach and let it simmer for 3 minutes and viola!

Serve with rice or boiled yam...whatever you fancy really.

On some days I add smoked fish, prawn and ground crayfish but today I was craving meat.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2012-01-17T20:26:00.000Z

Happy New Year everyone!!!

Better late than never *covers face*, at all at all naim bad pass. I was not in the mood to blog jor because of the condition of our nation, Nigeria plus I was busy relocating to a new ~~city~~ town. I bless God.

Now the strike is over, I can jejely sweep the cobwebs off GISTDOTCOM and get on with the year!Oh how I missed blogging!

Apart from the susbsidy issue, did everyone get off to a good start this 2012? Any new year resolutions? Plans? Trips? I pray the best of 2012 comes to us and this will be our best year yet!

BRILLIANT SONGS ON THE SUBSIDY MATTER!

My Yori-Yori's Wedding!

2011-12-27T22:12:00.001Z

2011 was THE year of weddings!
October 1st, 2011, my yori yori bid me farewell and followed man. *sigh*
I present to you Eyi and Toks Kolawole :)

I wish them a fantabulous married life! They shall live together forever! And the people say?...Amen!

Actually, I will share pictures of ALL my bestie's weddings, who wants to have a view?

'LUTOSIN GBELA PHOTOGRAPHY
BBPin:22C3A860

Share Your Boarding House Stories!!!

2011-12-22T19:52:00.000Z

I came across this video and it was absolutely hilarious!!! and you guys know anything that makes me laugh I must share, laugh alone, cry alone. lol. I didn't attend boarding school sha but those of you who did, break it down for us!

PS. The Dude in the Pink shirt!!! LMAO!

BANIPRODUCTIONS, more grease to your elbow!

Few Good Men...

2011-12-21T21:16:00.000Z

Last week, I boarded a taxi...had small talk with the driver. Not small talk...we were haggling about the cab fare jare; there is nothing I won't price, i even price items on sale! When I reach house, I off jacket, hang am. I off shoe. I off bra. I off pant. I off light! I was that knackered.

'Isn't it odd?' i thought to myself...' That I've been home for about 45 minutes and not a single Beep from my phone'...
So I got up, on light, put hand inside jacket pocket, nothing.

What? Nothing?!

Brethren, I had instant headache. I ran to my bag, hopeful that my ever forgetful self kept the phone there, I shook hand inside all the zip wey dey the bag, nothing! I turn the bag upside down and poured the contents on the floor, the half chewingum i forgot plus my bits and bobs on the floor, by now yours truly was sweating like Christmas goat, yet it was freezing!

Just like indomie instant noodles tears were flowing freely! It was not silent tears. I was screaming and wailing. I put my hands on my head and threw myself on the floor...(I didn't know I know I was such a drama queen). I dey cry like pikin wey dem thief hin sweet! The lifetime of my phone flashed right before my eyes in s-l-o-w m-o-t-i-o-n...how I walked into the Apple shop, paid in cash and took my baby home! oh my iPhone, my beloved iPhone!

All the while, Mr Muscle was on Skype, watching my dramatics.( *ahem* i don wear bra and pant) I'm sure he was entertained...and slightly worried as per future mother of his kids na-who wan marry krase?! "It's just a phone" he said in a bid to calm me down...I yelled with the rage of an intoxicated chihuahua, "It is not JUST a phone! It's a smart phone!". Mild symptoms of konkonbility.

I called my phone more than 10 times and it was just ringing...(signs that you will never get it back)...na so I remember how dem thief my alcatel phone inside 'along,along bus' for warri one time and the thing just dey ring...My other phone, one Bird phone too, the pesin thief am, and had the effrontery to tell me 'say goodbye to your phone, collect the sim in Mile 12'....this was Lagos. I started round two of my wailing. Mr Muscle finally said..."calm down, I called your phone and the driver said you should pick the phone from their office tomorrow, will you stop crying now?"

...ehn? Say God!

The phone was not stolen? I wiped my tears...'he was going to give it back to me?'...Wonders shall never end! Not in warri! Not in 9ja! God I thank you oh, that I did not end this 2011 in tears! There are still a few good honest men out there, men that will return your phone to you when you lose it....Early morrin, na me dem wake see for their office!

#Shout out to Sol Taxis Northampton!

Another Suicide! Oh no!

2011-12-16T07:44:00.002Z

Report: Woman Who Jumped From Bridge Was Missing Pharmacy Student

"The woman who reportedly jumped from the Arthur Ravenel Jr. Bridge on Friday was a 25-year-old MUSC student, according to police reports and various online articles.

Olutosin "Tosin" Oyelowo, a Nigerian national with roots in Wake Forest, NC, was last seen by motorists and pedestrians leaping from the Bridge, a Mount Pleasant police report states.

Calls reporting the jumping were received around 3:30 p.m. on Friday, according to reports. Police found Oyelowo's purse and driver's license at the summit of the bridge in the area where callers reported seeing her jump."...
http://mountpleasant-sc.patch.com/d/

I don't know her personally but she made me cry! Not another suicide by such a young promising person. What a waste! What is going on? So many suicides...

WIN A PAIR of LIZ YEMOJA GLAM LASHES

2011-12-09T20:07:00.001Z

The new swag this Christmas is flirting with your eyes…… Introducing - Liz Yemoja Glam Lashes. LY:GL are luxurious and beautifully natural looking eyelash extension that open and define your eyes ensuring you always get a 2nd look. You completely eliminate the need for mascara. The best thing about LY: Glam Lashes is that you illuminate your look without damaging your own lashes.

The Liz Yemoja Extreme Glamour Lashes' can be purchased @ Shop Unit A17 chase mall 19 Adetokunbo Ademola street V.I Lagos (Next to Tantalizers, inside the same compound as Deuces Night Club). You can also follow @Sharonojong or @lizyemoja on twitter for more details on getting a pair of luscious lashes!

For your chance to WIN, email lizyemoja@hotmail.co.uk with one or two lines about why your should win. 5 Winners will be selected at random. Closing date of competition. 28/12/2011

Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/groups/314791715205178/ - LY:GL

STYL-PLUS IS BACK WITH SILENT NIGHT!!!!

2011-12-09T20:01:00.002Z

LOVE EEEEEEEET!

And The Winners are...Drum roll!

2011-11-30T21:44:00.000Z

The winners of the the Book Giveaway have been selected using random.org and the comments were numbered from 1-17.

The first winner is NuttyJ: Nuttyjennifer@gmail.com is the winner of the first book

The second winner is Nakedsha: ankaraandlace@yahoo.com

The third winner is Martha: mnetimah@yahoo.co.uk

Congrats guys! The winners will be contacted shortly via email. Whew...thank heavens for random.org. E for no be small tubu tubu. Make una no worry e hear? those that did not win this time, you might be lucky for the next giveaway. Watchout!!! Thanks everyone for participating.

[Opinion] Nigeria Senate approves anti-gay marriage bill

2011-11-30T00:04:00.001Z

Gay sex marriage has been banned in Nigeria. Under the proposed law, gay couple's who marry face 15 years imprisonment, Witnesses and guests also face 10 years imprisonment!!! Other additions to the bill include making it illegal to register gay clubs or organisations, as well as criminalizing the "the public show of same-sex amorous relationships directly or indirectly".

What's your opinion? Yay or Nay?

Captured timeline from twitter

Follow me on twitter @Sisi_Yemmie

Win a Luxurious Wedding for 2012 worth £20,000!!!

2011-11-29T20:44:00.004Z

Attention 2012 Brides, Grooms, Family and Friends! Wedding Trendy has partnered with celebrity wedding professionals and is offering fabulous wedding packages worth £20,000 + for weddings in the year 2012!

Contact Wedding Trendy on +44 (0) 2085880628 and leave your name, phone number and email address to enter for these fabulous prizes HERE!

www.weddingtrendy.com

Errrr...by the way my brethren, join me in 21 days fasting and prayer. I believe this advert is for ME. I must be that lucky bride oh!!!

OPERATION SISI MUST MARRY COMMENCES!

P.S Don't forget to enter my giveaway HERE to win a copy of the book THE SMALL PRINT. Winners will be announced Wednesday 30th November! Goodluck!!!

'Racist Britian'...

2011-11-29T17:20:00.002Z

I would like to believe that the lady in the video below is speaking for a sad, teeny-weeny minority. I hope I am right. However, *clears throat* I've been living in Britain for short while now and I won't say I haven't noticed the 'eye' the spits, comments and the faces some of them make when I pass by, I no send them. It's their country, let them do as they wish.

What is annoying and disgusting however, is the regard and the way WE treat them when they come into our own countries, like they are mini gods, and that is pathetic. We even sell out our own people! I don't blame them, I blame our government for making the grass greener on the other side. Regardless of it all, we are all God's children and should learn to accommodate each other.

*Nagrega? I think she was trying to say Nigeria! lol

P.S Don't forget to enter my giveaway HERE to win a copy of the book THE SMALL PRINT. Winners will be announced Wednesday 30th November! Goodluck!!!

TWO BRIDES & A BABY FINALLY OUT!

2011-11-25T13:39:00.000Z

I remember the first time I saw this movie poster, I rated it one of the best Nollywood has ever produced. I'm hoping the movie is as good! Two Brides and a Baby produced by Blessing Egbe and directed by Teco Benson features Stella Damasus, O.C Ukeje, Chelsea Eze and Kiera Haywatch. Can't wait to see it, if you do please send your reviews!

Here's the movie schedule:

1. Silverbird (Lagos): by 3.30pm & 5.50pm
2. Genesis Cinemas (Lagos): 1.00pm, 3.00pm, 5.00pm & 7.00pm
3. Ozone Cinemas (Lagos): 10.30am, 12.25am, & 6.40pm
4. Silverbird Ceddi Plaza (Abuja): 12.00pm, 4.20pm, & 8.40pm
5. Silverbird SEC (Abuja):1.00pm, 3.00pm, 4.55pm, 7.00pm & 9.20pm
6. Silverbird (Port Harcourt): 4.10pm & 8.50pm
7. Genesis Cinemas (Port Harcourt): 10.15am, 4.25pm & 8.40pm
8. Silverbird (Uyo): 3.10pm

How do you rate this poster?

Contact Me

2011-11-24T23:12:00.000Z

Welcome to my page! I hope you've had a lovely time going through archived posts?If you have please send your comments suggestions, ideas, question and thoughts.

Hearing from you keeps me blogging.

Email Sisi - sisiyemmie@gmail.com

Follow my tweets - @Sisi_Yemmie

Like the GISTDOTCOM page on Facebook

When my face collapsed...

2011-11-24T07:43:00.000Z

It's Thanksgiving in America and thinking about what I'm thankful for just brought back some memories to my mind.

This time last year nor be small thing! I woke up one morning and I just had this weird feeling around my face...I went to the mirror and Lo and Behold brethren, my face had collapsed; one half of my face could not respond and the other half did...my speech was a bit slurred,one eye no dey close, i couldn't drink from a cup cos the water would spill...the one wey pain me pass, I could not smile!This is not a joke...

I went to the hospital and when I reach there the doctor called all his smallies to come and see me-the scapegoat',they used me like lab specimen. He called it Bells Palsy. I panicked, I really did, if you wake up one morning and discover your smile don bend, you will know what I'm talking about. I hid my self in my house, I just dey reason say, 'so na so I go do wedding with half face?' tufiakwa! all my dreams of the 'bellanaija wedding' vamoosed from my medulla oblangata...I called my mum, she said 'bells kini? back to sender'...

After 2 weeks of praying, hiding, depression and being on steroids the thing truly went 'back to sender'...so brethren, for this, for food in my fridge, love in my life, money in my pocket, inspiration for my blog, and other uncountable's & unmentionable's *ahem* I am THANKFUL- íjó ópè mi rè!!!

You nko? what are you thankful for?

Oliver don twist 2 by AREA!!!

2011-11-23T23:55:00.000Z

Some weeks back, AREA released a comedy parody video online of Don Jazzy's Oliver Twist competition called 'Oliver don Twist' and luckily for them they didn't get booed off the web, people seemed to actually like it! As it happens they just released the sequel to 'Oliver don Twist 2'. Enjoy!

Here is the Part 1 if you missed it!

Check out their facebook page HERE
This video is the "hot shit"..! Seriously... :-)

[OPINION]: Queen cheats on King with his friend...whats your take?

2011-11-21T14:19:00.000Z

The King of Swaziland, Mswati III evicted his 12th wife from the Palace for allegedly cheating on him with a former Justice. King Mswati III married Queen Dube, former Miss Swaziland when she was just 16years old. Under Swazi tradition the King is permitted to pick a new bride every year from the most beautiful ladies in Swaziland who come to dance 'topless' for him at the annual Reed Dance Festival *claps hands*

The evicted Queen Dube claimed that her husband, the King, has not seen her, talk less of of touched her in a year...I honestly cannot blame her right now considering the circumstances; body no be firewood,omode kekere are e. Plus the King has 13 wives in total...how can he satisfy them all? 14 women for 1 man!

What do you guys think?

GIVEAWAY: WIN A COPY OF THE BOOK 'THE SMALL PRINT!!!'

2011-11-20T13:56:00.000Z

Out of the generosity of my heart I have decided to giveaway 3 copies of The Small Print by Abimbola Dare. Read the excerpt HERE.Follow her on facebookHERE

For a chance to win, you need to leave your your email in the comment section, like the GISTDOTCOM Facebook page and be a follower of this blog. You can find the link at the top right hand corner of this page. Easy! At least if I dey dash something una go gats like me na! lol. I will be giving this interesting book to 3 lucky winners, so what are you waiting for??? Pless ya hand on the comments section now!!!

BOKO HARAM's TERMS FOR NEGOTIATION O_O

2011-11-18T13:47:00.000Z

The radical Islamist sect, popularly known as Boko Haram, has said that they will not dialogue with the Federal Government (FG) until all their members who have been arrested are released.

Spokesperson of the group, Abul Qaqa, who disclosed the groups demands on Thursday called on President Goodluck Jonathan; Senate President, David Mark; Speaker of the House of Representatives, Aminu Tambuwal; and the Attorney General and Minister of Justice, Mohammed Bello Adoke, to respond to their request or they would not relent in their attacks.

According to Qaqa: "The recipe for peace is the unconditional release of our members".
He, also revealed the identities of two suicide bombers who attacked the Joint Task Force headquarters (JTF) in Maiduguri and the Anti Terrorism two- storey building in Damaturu, as Usman alias Baana and Abi Yusuf, 26.

The group's spokesperson said that Baana, a successful businessman who left behind a wife and a son, was seen as a martyr because he was barely four days in the group before he pleaded to be allowed to carry out the act on the anti terrorism building.He also revealed that Yusuf was responsible for the bombing of the JTF headquarters in Maiduguri.

“He was also a martyr whom we are going to miss a lot because of his outstanding mastery of how to improvise explosives,” Qaqa said. Other demands of the group include, "Islam reigns supreme, and Sharia replaces the Constitution; all women are degraded; all ties with the Western World are severed".

Culled from Daily Times

Hmmmmm....what do you guys make of the last sentence??!!!!

WHAT SHOULD WE SHARE?

2011-11-18T12:08:00.001Z

About a week ago I was having a 'question and answer' session on twitter and on facebook and the question was: What is healthy to share? Should you share toothbrush with your spouse? Or panties (yes, pata!) with your siblings? How about the frequent sharing of towels with friends? Does it signify the intimacy between the 'sharers'? Does it mean if I can't share my boyfriends toothbrush I love him less? O_O

I remember one time like that I go visit one of my friend and I forgot to take my towel along (anyone who knows me knows I always forget something when travelling, why me?!). So as I wan baff I noticed the towel was not in the bag, so I proceeded to the shower and cleaned myself up with my nightwear. My dear friend offered her towel but i declined with immediate alacrity...oh well that was before I learned the art of diplomacy! I could tell that she was not happy with me sha.

Another time for uni, na so this omobabe tell me say she like my top and asked if she could borrow it. Ehn??? I told her I just bought it and instead of borrowing her I would rather dash her BUT as na 'tear rubber' top I kent. I go keep my thing! She vex, she called me stingy. See me see wahala...ontop my own thing! Even my sisters know say I nor like to dey share personal belongings...

Most recently someone asked to use my powder brush...This was someone I met at the changing room of an event. I looked at her like 'you're joking right'? ....but jejely gave it to her...and purposely forgot it. Sometimes I just can't say no.

I find it hard to share towels, sponges, make-up brushes, toothbrush (kai! there's nothing people won't ask to share). It is extrememly impossible for me to sip from the same straw/cup after someone else (this is why i nor dey share minerals). I wouldn't want to share my spoon as well, seriously!

Is it me? I know I don't have OCD because my friends tell me I'm very jaggered. I don't feel my body clean pass other people but aren't there some things that shouldn't be shared? Where can we draw this line and who should not cross it abeg?

Kate Henshaw Nuttall and Husband Divorce!

2011-11-16T00:06:00.000Z

So the gist is that Nollywood actress Kate Henshaw Nuttall and hubby are going their separate ways after 12 years of marriage. The marriage which is blessed with a daughter, 11, packed up few months ago due to 'irreconcilable differences'. Apparently Kate is a very busy actress while Rod her husband is equally away on business.

Oh well....what can I say?