skyefio's blog

So...Is Ian Doyle Prentiss' Darkest Secret?

2011-03-10T12:38:00.000+08:00

I used to be a CSI: Las Vegas fanatic until Gil Grissom left the show. I am a sucker for TV crime series and although CSI has two spinoffs (NY and Miami), I never really warmed up to the latter two. So I went on a lookout for a new show to obsessed over. My friend suggested I should watch Criminal Minds because according to her, its storylines were along the lines of CSI's. I went to grab myself a copy of the pilot and ohboy, went mental after that. The behavioral theme of the series got me and I was hooked. Must be the fact that watching a show about profilers helps me understand the motivations of people (my exes, in particular). Hahaha.

Anyway, moving forward...Criminal Minds is one show which I honestly think had shown remarkable resilience despite past casting shakeups (for Season Six, the latest casualty was Jennifer Jareau played by AJ Cook. Before her, the characters of Jason Gideon and Elle Greenaway were given the boot). Now according to the latest buzz, Emily Prentiss (Paget Brewster) will be next. This saddens me but I think as long as Thomas Gibson stays on board as Aaron Hotchner, the show can withstand any future casting quakes. He was The Glue of the show.

Since Season Six would be her final season, the writers finally decided to highlight Agent Prentiss. Looking back at her character's development, I initially thought she was so squeaky clean. Changed my mind when I saw succeeding episodes on her - she was just full of layers and secrets.

Flashbacks said she was formerly with Interpol. How utterly dramatic... but remember this might be her final hurrah, so the writers can be forgiven.Originally, I thought she and that Brit guy from the Criminal Minds Spinoff would be an item. How wrong I was.

Enter her darkest secret: Ian Doyle: brooding, dangerous and out to kill her.

Prentiss went AWOL, so she can protect her team from her nemesis. The rest of the team had to go out and find her with the help of...surprise! JJ was back for just an episode.

My friend and I were debating whether she was the love of his life (he referred to her as Lauren). My friend says no way but I love the aspect of vendetta and passion with an Irish accent so my guess was they were formerly involved. Lovers probably. Love it, love it, love it!

So what do you think, folks? Was Emily and Ian former lovers or what? Can't wait for next week!

Landslide on Glee

2011-03-09T15:44:00.004+08:00

Glee-ified. Again.

It seems that songs featured in Glee are turning into hot tracks once more. Well, sometimes Glee hits it dead on but there are times they miss. In the recent episode of the smash TV series, the latest song to be plucked from the icy music storage room was Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide". Yep, that song written by the lovely Stevie Nicks. Hey wait, I'm seeing Gwyneth Paltrow, not Stevie singing "mirror in the sky, what is love...".

Verdict? Uhm, well... she (Paltrow) was on most parts, fairly decent. And yes, I'll choose her a million times over Kim Kardashian's attempts to produce a note.

Gwyneth's been singing a lot lately since she landed that movie part playing a country singer. She even performed at the Oscars and people has been appreciative of her efforts. But to be honest, I like her more as an actor than as a singer. And I still like Stevie's "Landslide" version. There's really something in that ole girl's voice that struck a chord in me.

Now Gwyneth's other half on the other hand is a different story altogether, but I'm digressing again.

Lunchbreak Grocery Shopping, Winey Tall Tales and A Chocolatey Discovery

2010-12-29T15:46:00.001+08:00

It's two days before New Year's Eve and I am doing my last minute grocery shopping for our media noche and New Year lunch.

This year I’m making goat stew (kalderetang kambing), baked lamb chops, two kinds of baked fish (in Oriental style and a Mediterranean-style). Sides will be a veggie salad (courtesy of my Ma) and my garlicky mashed potatoes that my cousins loved to devour.

Most of the recipes I’ve picked were fairly easy and require marinating before popping them in the oven…except for the goat stew which required a bit more love and slow-cooking (for at least two and half hours). This is the first time I’m cooking goat so I want it to turn out perfect. I never scrimp on ingredients and New Year is the best time to splurge a little…well, other than my birthday. I got a little ball of edam cheese (I intend to fry any leftover cheese…yummy!), fresh goat meat from Guadalupe wet market, Philippine sea bass (apahap), grouper (lapu-lapu), balsamic vinegar, saffron and a lot of spices to update my spice cabinet.

Luckily, I was able to wrest a bottle of Bordeaux red from an unsuspecting co-worker who got it as a gift from one of our company suppliers. I spun a tale that the wine was a young, plain table wine not worth his tastebuds. I joked that it’s better off as an ingredient in one of my stews. I can’t believe he fell for it! It certainly helps when the label’s written entirely in French. Hahaha.

For dessert, I originally plan to make the usual blueberry cheesecake but I changed my mind since it’s too time consuming. I want to relax a bit this year. Because my nephews and nieces loved it, I decided to make fudge brownies instead. Problem was, I can’t find Valrhona or Callebaut dark chocolates from the local supplier here in Makati. I’m a bit pressed for time and cannot go to other suppliers in Manila or Mandaluyong. I checked the baking section at Landmark grocery in Makati to look for the best baking chocolate they have on stock. I was a bit deflated when I only found Goya and Val Houten chocolate compounds. No effing way! I told myself. I only use dark chocolate for my cakes and brownies and I never substitute.

I went off to try my luck at the confectionery section of the same supermarket. I was almost resigned to get one of those ridiculously expensive Lindt ones. When I was about to leave the section, I turned and saw the display on the opposite aisle. My eye got caught by these plain gold chocolate bars of a brand that I am totally unfamiliar with. When I checked them out, it says that these were made by Whittaker’s of New Zealand. According to the wrapper, the company has been making chocolates since 1896.

Great, I told myself…that meant they really know chocolate. And they have dark bittersweet chocolate (72% cocoa) sourced from Ghana, the second largest producer of cacao beans. I decided to give this new brand a try. I bought about 250 grams of dark chocolate and a 50 gram bar of their creamy milk chocolate variant. After I got back at my desk that afternoon (I did my shopping during my lunch break), I hastily unwrapped the milky variant. Bam! The milk chocolate had a pleasant aftertaste that won me over. That was a divine chocolate experience that from now on, I promise never to look at Cadbury’s or Hershey’s again. At P39/50 gram bar (roughly US$0.86 apiece), it was a steal. I can’t wait to try the dark chocolate next January 1. Based on the reviews I’ve read online, the Ghana bittersweet variant was make for baking…if one can resist eating them first.

I was happy with the discovery of this Kiwi product.... I’ll try their other chocolate lines next time.

UP stude charged with killing kitten ( source/credit: INQUIRER.net)

2010-12-03T16:15:00.001+08:00

Just sharing this news update re the student who killed "Teng-Teng", a helpless kitten last year:

UP stude charged with killing kitten - INQUIRER.net, Philippine News for Filipinos

Never Again

2010-11-19T14:54:00.001+08:00

"I am very, very disappointed!"

This I uttered after I got my takeout...after waiting for an hour and a half for it. Standing up.
Damn right I am mightily pissed. That's why I really have to blog about this. Probably the worst dining experience EVER for me.

Now here's a gist of what transpired today:

I went for an early lunch after I finished my transaction at the bank. I am in the mood to try something new, so I decided to check out Chicken Bon Chon, one of the newest food establishments that recently opened at the Ayala Triangle Garden, located at the back of the building where I am working. I already heard a lot about their chicken (the press about it was - "voted America's best chicken") so I wanted to try it myself.

It was 11:30 am on my watch by the time I entered the place.
It was packed already but I patiently waited in line for my turn at the counter. Ten minutes afterwards, I ordered two pieces of chicken drumsticks, rice, soda and fries. After paying P190, I was given a number and was told to wait. By this time, the place was really bursting at the seams from the people who wanted to have their lunch or buy a takeaway. Plenty of people, means good business, I thought.

So there I was, standing beside the door, waiting for my chicken meal. After thirty minutes of waiting, I calmly followed up my order with three harassed-looking service crew members. I tried to rationalize the delay. Maybe it was due to the fact that they were just in the "soft opening" stage. A full hour passed and this time, I am no longer smiling nor rationalizing. I am hungry and my lunch period was almost up and still no chicken! I am normally a very, very, very patient person. I came from UP, where lines are invented. :)

Several diners already ate and left and I was still waiting for my order. I continuously stopped every crew member who passed by and asked them where the hell was my chicken and why was it taking so long. They always promised to follow it up with the kitchen crew blah blah blah. Worse, some diners who came after me got served first. This almost made me blew my top. Now that was BAD customer service.

the chicken was good but it took forever

Finally, my chicken arrived at around 12:55 p.m. and the crew member who approached me apologetically said that I still needed to wait for my soda. I asked her if I had to wait for another millennium for my drink at the rate they were going. A minute or two passed, she went back and gave me my soda while at the same time giving me a contrite look. I was already extremely irritated from the entire experience that I just want to get the hell out of there. I told her that I was very, very disappointed with their service.

To be fair, the chicken was superb (I got the soy-garlic chicken variety) and crispy. I also liked the fries which were hand-cut and well-seasoned. I demolished everything, but then again...I was very hungry.

But will their great-tasting chicken enough to draw me again? Sad to say, but my answer will be a resounding NO. No way I'm going back there where the waiting time is simply FOREVER. Maybe the owner should hire additional crew members as they were evidently undermanned. Overall, the service sucks big time.

I'd go for KFC next time I'm craving for chicken.

E.R.

2010-07-21T09:45:00.000+08:00

As of this writing, I still haven't slept much. We had to rush Pa to the ER of Makati Med around 11 p.m. last night when he complained of chest pains and after suffering from hives. He accidentally ingested aspirin and he's highly allergic to the stuff. Docs had to treat him with IV antihistamines and steroids to bring the swelling and allergic reaction under control. They had to inject it to him twice because of the severity. Thank goodness he's okay around 5 a.m. and we finally got the go sign from the ER docs around 6 a.m. to take him home.

We all gave a collected sigh of relief and prayed thanks to Him for looking over our family.

As for Papa, he's now in deep slumber, resting.

Love you, Pa.

Note to self: “I need a new phone”

2010-07-05T20:47:00.001+08:00

‘Tis that time of the year again when I usually get the gadget itch. Last year I was pining for the HP netbook. Good thing I am still contented with my mini 5101’s performance and will not be buying a new one soon. What I do covet is a new phone.

My current phone is almost two years old and although it still works perfectly today as it had when I first unboxed it…I really need a newer model for connectivity purposes. I am an EA a.k.a glorified pencil-pusher by day, so I need a smartphone to make calendar/scheduling/synching a breeze especially when I’m out of the office. I can’t afford and even if I do have the budget… I wouldn’t buy the pricier iPhone G4, which still commands a whopping P45k-50k price range. Add another P20k to that and you’ll get yourself an entry-level Macbook Pro. So even if I’m lusting after its delish design, the G4 is still a no-no. I’m saving up for the Macbook Pro, which is a better investment.

I need a mid-priced Android phone and make that a Sony Ericsson one (contrary to many, I am not a Nokia/Samsung aficionada). SE may be steeper, but they are sturdier compared to the phones manufactured by the other two players. Besides which, they usually have a nice mix of features for the more than average user. I was already sold at getting an Xperia x10 mini, priced at around P18-19k but I find the screen a tad too small. Second, it’s a slider and I am not a big fan of those phone types. Luckily I had second thoughts because I’ve read in the SE webby that they will be launching the Xperia x8 in the 3Q 2010. The x8 is a mid-range touchscreen bar phone which has similar UI and specs as the Xperia x10 mini except for the screen size (which is bigger in the x8) and camera (x10 mini has a 5megapix cam whereas the x8 only has a 3.5 megapix one…something I really don’t care for because I’d rather use my digital camera for my pictures). Price point is great at P13-15k. Originally it was said that it will launch with the Android 1.6, which is already old…but according to the latest SE press release, it will be upgraded to 2.1 to keep it competitive with the rest of the phones in that price-range. Cool Android phone for the masses. Will definitely wait for this one to come out sometime September or October this year… I can justify buying it for my birthday. Lol.

The SE Xperia X8

Specs (courtesy of gsmarena.com):
* General: GSM 850/900/1800/1900 MHz, UMTS 1900/2100 MHz, HSDPA
* Form factor: Touchscreen bar
* Dimensions: 99 x 54 x 15 mm, 104g weight
* Display: 3″ 16M-color TFT capacitive touchscreen with HVGA resolution; scratch-resistant surface
* Platform: Android OS 1.6 with custom Sony Ericsson UI
* CPU: 600Mhz processor
* Memory: 128MB internal memory, microSD card slot, 2GB card included
* Camera: 3-megapixel fixed-focus camera, geo-tagging, VGA@30fps video recording
* Connectivity: Wi-Fi 802.11 b/g, Bluetooth 2.1 with A2DP, standard microUSB port, GPS receiver with A-GPS, digital compass, 3.5mm audio jack
* Misc: Timescape UI, Infinite button, accelerometer for screen auto rotate, FM radio with RDS, TrackID music recognition
* Battery: 1200 mAh Li-Po battery

Looking Back

2010-06-17T20:35:00.006+08:00

I've revisited some of my posts from my other blog and this particular entry caught my eye. I wrote this at a time when everything in my life was coming apart at the the seams - when my heart just got scooped out of my chest. I was a mess. I hated myself. I hated everyone. Except my cat, Kookie.

Ten days after writing this entry, I got hired at the company I'm currently working for. And six months after the fact, I got over another fucking broken heart.

Reconnection

2010-01-29T22:20:00.007+08:00

Virtual cobwebs abound here. Gee. This place got neglected big time.

I haven't written anything here for quite awhile because I had another blog that I regularly post to. I own the domain for that other space and paid for the hosting in advance for the next two years. Maybe that's the reason I felt more obligated to write on it on a regular basis... probably to justify why in the world did I get one when I could get a blog (like this one) for free. Stupid really. But I'm a control freak, you see, albeit I am, shall we say...a bit reformed now. Still, some habits die hard and having complete control over a few things (which included blogging software) is forgivable.

And one more reason for the overdue post...I'm too lazy to cross-post. Where's the fun in repetition?

I was able to reconnect with an old friend whom I haven't seen for quite some time. Almost six years in fact.

I am to be blamed for that. My fault, hands down.

Six years ago, we both had a friend that I had a falling out with.

After the fact, I was hurting so much that I decided to divorce myself from anything /anyone who had contact with or will remind me of this former friend. I got rid of gifts, cards, pictures and even removed this person 's name from my social networking account.

I hit my internal reset button. I resigned from my old job and got a new one - one that was totally unrelated to my previous work experience. I was out of my comfort zone but I taught myself to become more assertive and realized that yes, I have enough gray matter to make things happen for me.

I met a lot of people and made friends with many of them.

It took time to get over my anger and to finally accept that people change...change after all is the only constant in our lives.

In a nutshell, I grew up.

Regrettably, to cope with the pain, I had to severe all ties with my other friend. And for a long time, I felt guilty for what I did.

Our talk last night ended that. I am grateful she listened and never judged me for my actions in the past. She understood I had to go through these motions to find myself. What a relief .

She did try to bring up the idea of a reconciliation with the former friend but I told her not to. I'll be civil but that will be the end of it. I will not be able resurrect the closeness. I could never have that other person back as a friend again after the same threw away our friendship like it was nothing.

I've burned my bridges.

Justice for Teng-Teng

2009-05-08T15:37:00.004+08:00

Love and respect for animals is an advocacy I believe in. You can read in my previous posts that I tend to get passionate when animals are threatened, maltreated and killed, as in the case of Teng-teng, a stray cat at the University of the Philippines in Diliman.

I am posting the petition letter which aims to have the cat-killer expelled from the University. As such, I would like to ask your help to spread the word and sign the actual letter at : http://www.thepetitionsite.com/petition/144299696.

Thank you.

***

Justice for Tengteng

Target:

Faculty of the University of the Philippines, Diliman

Holidays, the Kitch and Me

2008-12-12T11:24:00.002+08:00

This holiday season is as always, a stressful time. Last minute holiday shopping aside, I also have to think of a fitting menu for the New Year get-together that my family and relatives celebrate every year in lieu of Christmas.

As early as the first week of December, I'm already thinking of the gargantuan task of cooking everything by myself - from appetizer to dessert. For five years in a row, they have "officially" delegated me this task (and that included not just logistics but the budget as well. lol). I think my relatives and Ma already accepted the fact that I don't want them around the kitchen when I'm manning it so I guess...I brought this unto myself. Haha.

I also have to take into consideration special food requirements that some of my family members have - i.e. my Pa is allergic to poultry/shellfish while cheese is positively lethal to my cuz R aka evil twin, so coming up with a menu to address their food needs can be quite a challenge already.

I'm ditching the roasted turkey. I've done it three years ago and let me tell you, it exhausted me tremendously. It took too much time to prepare and cook . The only comfort I derived from cooking the bird was that it did turned out perfectly roasted and juicy. The family devoured it in one sitting.

The menu I'm thinking for this year consisted of an appetizer or two (probably melba toast and crispy spinach), a cold salad (baby potatoes in mayo mustard dressing), a pasta dish (ravioli), chicken pastel, baked lapu-lapu, crown roast of pork or baked short ribs and for dessert it's either mango crepe samurai or a three-layer chocolate mousse confection.

Too ambitious too pull? Ugh. I know. Good luck to me.

Fluffy Darlings

2008-04-07T20:35:00.008+08:00

Sphinx and Fudgee napping together

I decided to stay at home last weekend instead of going to work and finish the usual stuff that accumulated on my desk while I was out last Friday. I DESERVE a break. So I lazed around all day - doing a bit of cooking and writing.

My kittens, Sphinx and Fudgee were jumping all over the place, playing with their schizo of a mom, Kookie, for about an hour or so before they eventually got tired and decided to take a nap. I took these pictures 'cause they looked so cute embracing each other while taking their dose of zzzzzzzzzzs.

my babies

Beachy Me

2008-03-21T12:41:00.002+08:00

An update about my *ho-hum* existence.

Since I’m not Catholic, I always look forward for the Lenten Season because it entails a long vacation from work. From being busy, from everyone. Away from this place I have ambivalent feelings for – Manila. Unfortunately, there’s no escaping Manila this year. Shame on me for not taking advantage of those cheap airline seats several months ago. Arggggh.

Fate has inflicted her punishing hand and now I am suffering. Longing for a getaway. The closest thing I could ever be to a beach this year will be to gape at the wallpaper of my brother’s pc.

And to think that around the same time last year I was frolicking at the Cagayan Valley and letting my then-short hair-down in the far-flung place that was Aparri. I don’t have that great love for swimming but I love walking down the long stretches of a beach. It always calms me, like arms beckoning me for a warm hug. I dunno. This must’ve been brought about by those vacations that my family used to have when I was still a kid – me running along the shoreline just in time to kiss the morning sun.

Twilight was the best time for me. I love the magentas in the sky after the gold sun has long melted away in the horizon – how it complemented the warm sand on my feet. Around that time, things have quieted down – excursionists usually packed their belongings and are already on the road for home. Only fellow beachcombers hang about the sands – with only their shapes visible whilst their faces masked by shadows in subtle anonymity. The anti-social in me likes that as I enjoy the silkiness of dusk like a balmy shawl around my shoulders, free to listen to the caress of the waves reclaiming the sand back as its own.

I’m dying to go somewhere out of here. Drift somewhere. Run again in the sand. Climb a peak. Sleep in a hammock. To renew. No worries. Lie on my back watching stars until I rot.

Instead I’m stuck like here an errant fly. Nothing left to do for the next few days but stare at this computer screen.

Or a thousand ceilings.

Ocean deep of sh*t.

Uhm...I changed my mind again

2008-02-12T16:54:00.001+08:00

I can't believe he said that. Priorities? Him? What?! Oh no, told myself. Deja vu. In caps: MAJOR MISTAKE.

Run. Run. Run!

Wrap-Up

2008-01-01T23:06:00.001+08:00

It's a spanking new year and since I don't do those resolution-type entries mushrooming in the blog universe...I'd rather recap how the previous year went by.

To begin with, I was unemployed when the previous year began (I gave up my headset and left the BPO world behind because to be honest...the lifestyle didn't suit me...was too ingrained into the eight-to-five-office-type system, but heck, I still managed to stick around for a year). I was disenchanted with what's happening with my life - my career, my personal life and sheesh...even my weight.

A month thereafter, I was hired by an international pharmaceutical company as an EA to an expat boss. I made friends out of colleagues, the job was a breeze. I was settling well when at the most inopportune moment; I faced unemployment for the second time in a year.

You guys have no idea how many resume submissions (and how many trees died in vain), initial and final interviews I had to suffer in the quest of earning my keep. To give myself some credit, I was always included in the final two or three people the employer had to decide on hiring. It's just that I was not the one chosen or if I was, I could never agree to the compensation package I was being offered.

Then this current job came out of nowhere (didn't even applied for it) like manna. So far, I'm having a blast - I'm driven and focused and really, really enjoying it. Above-board benefits, stable company, good working environment, interesting colleagues, a very understanding boss...what more can a workaholic woman ask? Keeping my fingers crossed and really hoping to stick to this one for a really long time.

On a personal level, everything's splashed on the pages of my three web blogs. I was rudderless and broken at one point, angry in another, somewhat happy in some and blue on most parts. But I'm still a lucky bitch: I got a good and loving family (if a bit uber-protective) and really loyal friends to back me up whenever I had my melancholic episodes.

As I sit here in front of the PC typing my thoughts, I can't help but smirk. Oh-seven was a pretty interesting year. As I've written in my previous entries, 'twas a rollercoaster ride...the loopy kind.

Thy Pen is Female

2007-10-27T13:13:00.001+08:00

A schmuck left a comment at my other blog which went like this: “you’re (sic) writing sucks...all female rubbishness (sic)…you, like other female wanna-be (sic) pen wielders out there are so fond of the trivial than what is real”.

I can take criticism. It’s one of the first things an aspiring writer must keep in mind – writing isn’t for sissies who can’t take the heat. Criticism from readers makes a writer grounded, keeps him on his toes. But schmuck’s comment on my being female automatically equates to bad writing drew my ire. Clearly, the Neanderthal look down at women’s writing as something insignificant, a lesser variety that can only have in its backbone knowledge of the trivial kind.

Good writing has nothing to do with gender, rather, it is a product of creativity and skill – of stringing words together until they not only make sense but develop a life of its own. When I write, sarcasm always flavors my work. I have nothing to apologize for or to feel lesser for. It’s not deliberate but it’s how I think and it’s the way that best express what I am.

And please, before anyone dare call this kettle black…kindly hit the spell checker before posting anything.

For Mama

2007-07-27T13:22:00.001+08:00

It’s my Ma’s birthday today, her 63^rd. As I’ve told many of my friends, she could still fit into some of my clothes, wear three-inch stilettos and sashay like a Parisian ramp model. Even the way she carried her signature cigarette exudes certain flair and élan. Yep, that’s my Ma for you. An absolutely stunning creature.

We’ve come to terms with our individual differences over the years. She stopped hounding me to wear more “colorful” clothes. I think she had now learned to respect that I got my own style – in dressing up or dressing down, whichever fits my mood. I managed to even surprise her every now and then.

There was this one instance I wore this really chic and short dress that gave the illusion that I’ve got a good (rather than boyish) figure. She stopped at her tracks and told me admiringly, “ang ganda naman ng anak ko!”, which elicited an embarrassed guffaw from me. I seldom hear approval from her for the way I carry clothes. Maybe she finally realized I’m now a woman and no longer the bashful kid that I was before.

Today, I want to honor her for giving me and my brother life. You see, when my Ma and Pa married, they were already resigned to the fact that they will never have children. On the first year of their marriage, my mother underwent two major operations for a malignant cyst that grew on her reproductive organs. The doctor removed about two-thirds of her ovaries and a part of one fallopian tube. The probability of ever conceiving a child after that was less than five percent.

But two years after the procedure, she found herself expecting my brother. She carried him for less than seven months before she hemorrhaged and almost died on the operating table. She would often narrate that at that moment, she knew she was near death’s door… she was seeing bright lights and she saw her life flashing before her eyes. It was weird, she said.

But she fought for her life and my brother’s and against all odds, won the battle.

Less than a year after that traumatic birth, she found herself in the family way again. This time, she was expecting me. My maternal grandma threw a fit at my Pa for letting an “accident” like me happen. Their daughter will surely die this time, they told Pa. After some consideration, they agreed to have the second pregnancy terminated.

So off she went to her OB-Gyne to consult the doc for the termination. However, she was dissuaded by the doctor, who told her she should be thankful for being enceinte in the first place (wherever that doctor is today, I owe her a resounding thank you. Lol.). The doc said that provided she spent a part of her pregnancy in complete bed rest, she can carry me full term. And she did that. Carried me for nine months, I mean.

She would even show me her “battle scars” – the abdominal incisions when she delivered me by caesarian section. Gleefully, she would add how my maternal grandparents (especially my Lola) cried when they saw me – squawking and bald as a baby. I was the only female grandchild among a brood of seven male grandchildren. I was her crown jewel, she told me once.

In a previous entry I have written that there was a point in my life that I though I hated her. Eventually my love for her won and that would stay until I breathe my last.

Woman. Provider. Nurturer. Fighter. Disciplinarian. My very own fashion icon.

My Ma and I love her.

Postscript: For now, the only thing she is hounding me (and my brother) is her desire to have a grandchild (within the bounds of wedlock of course, she added). That, my friends, needs further deliberation and thought. Haha.

Money Matters 101

2007-07-03T08:43:00.001+08:00

I learned to handle money the hard way: by literally becoming broke at one point in my life. That was a hard place to be in and like any downfall; really agonizing.

I started working even before I graduated from college, doing odd jobs here and there. I knew the value of hard work. It’s just that I haven’t realized yet the value of managing well one’s personal finances to make it work for me, not the other way around. I opted for shopping sprees, bad investments and instant gratification.

Sounds familiar?

Very few of us Filipinos are born into established wealth. Majority of us have to strive to earn a form of income, either by having a business or as salaried professionals/employees. We traditionally see earning a living as simply as that - earning money. Usually, people’s attitude towards earning a living is simply to be able to spend what they currently have. Similarly, the idea of “saving” for many was to set a side a certain amount with the intention of buying something tangible right away – i.e. a new car, the latest generation of iPod, the coolest mobile phone or a new game console. The list is endless. One can never run out of wants, yet incapable of identifying the real necessities or needs.

I got a nudge into the right direction when my good friend, Charlie D. gave me a book about personal finance management more than a year ago. I have known Charlie since 1998, when I worked for a financial consultancy firm as an assistant. Charlie was a member of our firm’s roster of financial consultants, one of the best I ever had the privilege to work with. Well, in a way that’s already a given since he is a qualified CFA (Chartered Financial Analyst) from The Wharton School (of the University of Pennsylvania). He’s a genuine smart act.

He’s one of the few men whom I can literally spend hours talking with without getting bored – whether the topic is about the gyrations of the Sexbomb girls to highly complex business and financial talk, Charlie is your guy. Mind you, he can really have you in stitches with his dead-pan delivery and droll wit. One thing I really liked about him is that he is never selfish with his knowledge. Up to now, I can always depend on him for insider knowledge about the market or anything pertaining to the financial world. He is always just an email away, always giving me really straightforward answers, without the bullshit and mishmash, all explained in a way that even the neighborhood baker can understand.

The book he gave me was penned by Francisco Colayco. At first, I thought: oh, great another one of those self-help books flooding the publishing business. Maybe he thought I really needed help. Nyahahaha. As I began reading it though, I got hooked and excited. Mr. Colayco preached the 20% rule of thumb as an answer to how much should be kept aside to be used on financial instruments that are higher than the current seven percent inflation rate. In an equation, this is simply income less savings equals expenses or living within the 80% of what one is earning. Extremely difficult? At first, yes. Like any bad habit, curbing one’s spending pattern is similar to going cold turkey on a bad nicotine habit. Well, at least in my case, it was. You see, the great equalizer in planning for one’s financial security is time. One would be surprised how a meager P10 as day ( P300/month) can grown into millions of pesos at a conservative annual rate of 12% in 30 years. Imagine the returns if the savings are higher and if the rates peak around 20%. To be prudent, he said that half of the 20% being set aside are for investments, while the other half is for medical/life premiums and/or pre need pension plans. The key here is to leave one’s savings and investments by themselves.

Next question that comes into mind is: what is the best financial instrument to use? Mr. Colayco espoused mutual funds as good financial instruments compared to the traditional savings account and time deposits which have small returns and are usually subject to a lot of taxes. Since I am naturally ignoramus about mutual funds, I ran to Charlie for answers. He said mutual funds are merely a pool of funds from different and small investors which are managed by a fund manager. To illustrate, he said that to be able to buy stocks or acquire fixed assets like bonds, one cannot go “tingi”. So, by combining a pool of investors, the fund manager can get investments not readily available to the general public, like blue chip stocks.

Charlie said that there are basically three kinds of funds in the Philippines, categorized according to risks: fixed income funds, equity fund and balanced funds. In a fixed income fund, money is invested in “fixed amount” instruments – t-bills, t-notes, corporate bonds, sovereigns, etc. , making the risk lower but then again, this does not guarantee that the principal will not be affected. Next in the list is the equity fund. In this type of fund, the money is invested in companies listed in the stock market. Risk varies depending on the aggressiveness or conservativity of the fund it self and there can be no guarantee that your principal will be protected (even though they some guarantee it). Tax is generally lower here since income from equity investments has already been paid.

The last category represents the best of both worlds or what is called a balanced fund, in which they invest your money in a mix of both fixed income and equity investments. It does not mean that your principal will be protected partially in this type of fund. It just represents a lesser risk than that of an equity fund but higher returns than that of a fixed income instrument.

He said that investing in a mutual fund should also depend on what type of appetite I have as an investor. Since, I am fairly new to the game, he advised me to start with a balanced fund. Ideally, he said, it would be good to leave the money alone for 3 to 5 years, preferably adding increments over time, which could go as low as P1k. Checking the fund’s historical performance over the years is also sensible, he said. In addition, the fund chosen should be accredited by the Fund Management Association of the

Philippines

I opened my balanced fund last year, just to give it a try. I was only expecting a modest return of 12%. Lo and behold! Got myself a YTD NAV of 21%. That ain’t bad for a newbie investor.

Fuse

2007-06-25T18:08:00.001+08:00

It’s one of those days that I just want to hurl a golf ball into someone’s groin for the sheer wickedness of it. And God help me, today’s a Monday. What a great way to kick-off the week.

Don’t get me wrong: I really tried my best not to lose it. My temper, I mean. If I’d been given a peso every time just to rein it in, I’d have fucking millions by now. I had marinated myself in the receiving end of verbal abuse for a year, so hell yes; I thought I can handle an imp impersonating as a travel agent.

I’m no sage. I don’t know all the freaking answers and if I do, I would still keep my noise hole shut. That’s why I needed help in the first place, the ONLY reason I asked help from the idiot village masquerading as a travel agency.

Let me indulge you with a story.

Once upon a time, a stressed assistant booked two business class flights from Manila to Osaka on the twenty-fourth of April. The travel agent who answered her was a fag. Oh, great…the assistant thought. I get along well with the members of the third sex. I have many fag friends. Poor thing…she was wrong.

The travel agent was the worst practitioner of customer service in this side of the world. Not only does he shouts whenever there are changes made in the bookings but he also ENSURE that the assistant would have to grovel at his funky feet for any updates . A month went by. No call. Booking remained waitlisted. Forty-five days went by…and by this time, the assistant’s boss required the booking details to finalize hotel reservations in Osaka. Assistant called and emailed the agent. Still no confirmation. Boss threw a tantrum. Assistant imbibed a bottle of Maalox to help stabilize her tummy while riding the storm.

In the end when things calmed down, the stressed assistant told the boss what really happened. The boss wanted to stop doing business with the idiot village altogether. An intermediary reincarnated as the marketing director stepped in and lambasted the owner of the agency. Apparently, the owner of the travel agency threw her own version of a meltdown to her staff. That should have been the end of it all. Everyone’s happy.

Hah.

Back to the real world.

The psycho travel agent called me up at four p.m. today, shrieking like a shrew. Just stopped short of calling me a liar. That’s it. I’ve reached the end of my rope.

I’ve dropped the goody-two-shoes act. Gave him a taste of what he truly deserved.

“You know what? I never had this problem with other agencies. Only with you guys, particularly YOU! To be frank about it…they call me EVERYDAY to update me regarding any status of my booking!”

“So, all you want is for me to call you EVERYDAY?”

“NO! NO, NO, NO, NO! You just don’t get the point, do you? Other travel agencies find time to update me because I’m the freaking CLIENT!”

“Miss, I have a photographic memory…I know I updated you about….”

“I don’t fucking care! Everyone can claim to have photographic memory. In your case, my dear, you just don’t have film in your head…whereas I… I’m the digital variety! Don’t bother calling again to update me, for this will be my last booking with you guys. Send me the bill and goodbye.”

I slammed the handset into its cradle. Then, I counted. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one.

I smiled. The assistant from hell is back in the house, baby.

Literary Transgression

2007-06-06T17:01:00.002+08:00

I am opinionated.

But I am also objective. I don’t dish out or put my ten cents in without reviewing facts. I was raised by my parents to be observant, to practice objectivity and not let emotional highs or personal biases cloud my decisions.

At one point, this credo was put to a test when I was still in high school. I was the editor-in-chief of the school organ and I clashed with my journalism teacher frequently until finally, I walked out on her when she changed the final edition of the paper and rewrote my column and editorial to incorporate her personal views. I was utterly dismayed by her sheer brazenness, her disregard for the very principles that the organ stood for and her delusions of omnipotence. She thought she can get away with it. After all, my classmates were terrified of her wrath and the implications regarding with their grades. She though she could shut me up.

The old dragon was mistaken. Big time.

I don’t kiss ass and if ever I would…I’d rather kiss mine, thank you very much. I don’t like crap, especially in my own backyard. So, to continue with the tale, I reported her brand of poop to The Man (to quote the endearing Black Jack) – the school principal, in this case. The principal then gave her a reprimand and a three-week suspension after I presented the evidence.

My journalism teacher was a vindictive b%@*&… err…witch; she thought she could inflict damage through public humiliation when she gave the “Journalist of the Year” award to my assistant editor. You see, in my high school, that plum is traditionally given to the editor-in-chief. I just laughed it off. I don’t give a hoot for titles, especially juvenile ones. I passed NCEE with flying colors and I passed UPCAT. That’s enough vindication for me. Haha. Eat my dust, scumbag!

Why am I relating this? Well, a few weeks ago, a new friend of mine, a Filipino romance author par excellance was getting flak from the camp of another author, who happens to be more “popular” in terms of readership, at least in this country. My friend became a target when she opined that one of the books of the more “popular” writer was so similar to a book penned by Linda Howard, an internationally known best-selling author. Unfortunately, because of the wonders of the Internet, this outlook of hers reached the ears of the other writer and her throngs of zealots, thus causing the brouhaha which painted my friend as a jealous, backstabbing bitch.

Why did I refer to them as zealots? Because in my book, an open-minded person would look at both sides of a story before reaching a decision, in the spirit of justice and fair play, right? What happened instead was a kangaroo court complete with a hang jury. My friend’s name was sullied by malicious emails, innuendoes and even nasty “I hate yous” in her personal website.

To be fair about the whole thing, I did troop to the nearest NBS to get myself a copy of the other writer’s contentious book, to see for myself if it was really blameworthy of plagiarism. O di ba, gumastos pa ‘ko. I read Ms. Howard’s book as well. Compared the two, line for line, word for word…and sorry to say, the local author bootlegged Ms. Howard’s work unabashedly. She did try to change the names of the locations and characters to “filipinize” the story but despite these attempts, it was evidently lifted. I was aghast that there were even lines and sentences that were literal translations. I want to throw this “popular” writer’s book to the bin. It was so blatant that I bled for Ms. Howard. Imagine yourself spending sleepless nights trying to weave words to make your characters believable, only to have someone claim it as their own. Slimy, right?

I was so pissed that I ranted my exact thoughts at my friend’s alternate website. I also read her piece about the entire issue, which I thought packed a wallop…so I hailed in the guestbook section:

“Pure stroke of evil genius, milady...sheer...unadulterated brimestone! The *** who calls herself a "writer" deserves to be pilloried in the public for daring to piss on your good name! What a ****! I wanna be there when you pummel this **** piece of *** to the ground! I want to collect her blood and feed it to her throngs of zealots who rate the same destiny as their inferior demishit! Kudos to you!”

Of course, I have no intention to assassinate her or collect her blood. But judging the leanings of the popular author and her fans …. I have no doubt it would be taken literally. Phuleeez. I cannot tolerate dramatics. It was merely a figurative way of expressing my disgust. Why is the operative word here. And up to now the other writer wouldn’t dare comment or explain her side about the real issue. Instead she skirted around it… making mundane excuses left and right…exclaiming that my author friend was out to destroy her because of envy. Why oh why can’t she face the music? Is it because she’s fearful of the truth? Why mask it with all these melodramatic bullshit? Why boast that her “fans” are so loyal to the point they won’t read any other author other than her? How dare her to unequivocally underestimate the reading public!

She has the same tones as that of my journalism teacher; together they can belt a mean duet. Haha. I sure hope she won’t be stupid enough to push me, or else I’ll be forced to ask Simon & Schuster, publishers of Linda Howard’s book about their take on the definition of plagiarism. That would be adding insult to injury.

I empathize with my friend because she’s experiencing really hostile waters for exercising her basic right – the freedom of opinion and expression, especially when she has valid points to substantiate her view. I share her sentiment without reservation.

Yes, I am opinionated. Very much so, if I may add. I won’t zip and stay mum for the sake of harmony or conformity. That has never been my style. But I am no bigot, nor am I a hypocrite and definitely am not a fraud. I am just my own person.

What's in the Noodle?

2007-05-07T11:15:00.001+08:00

My two aunts and I went on a shopping spree in Divisoria. I was looking for a particular pair of shoes that a colleague was wearing. I thought it was Italian-made because of the sleek design. She told me she bought the pair from 168 Mall in Divisoria for only P250. I have acquired a new fetish for shoes, so I dragged my two aunts along. To cut the story short, I have to search the entire mall and just when I was about to give up, I found the pair I was looking for. I was so pleased with myself. I also bought a white cotton blouse, another pair of slip-ons and a bolero for my other dress at home. My aunts also bought their fair share of fashion loot.

We decided to drop by Quiapo on our way home because I have to buy walnuts for my cookies. We were walking on the way to the market when we chanced upon the old Ma Mon Luk restaurant. We were surprised that the place still exists amidst all the changes happening around the area. Despite the sweltering heat, my aunts grew excited and wanted to eat right away...saying that the last time they ate at the place, they were still in their teens. Well, for me...the last time I ate there, I was still in high school. My Ma and I would eat there after buying my school uniform and other school needs.

Ma Mon Luk, to the uninitiated is famous for their beef noodle soup or beef mami. It has been around since time immemorial and was extremely popular before the fastfood chains came into existence.

So, the three of us seated ourselves comfortably inside the restaurant. If one is looking for posh seats and ambiance, they came to the wrong place. One might say that the place wasa time capsule of a bygone era. The tables and chairs look worn but they are still sturdy, the ceilling fans were virtual antiques, while its walls were adorned with numerous newspaper and magazine clippings hailing the restaurant's gastronomical offerings. We were immediately approached by the waiter. I noticed that almost all waiters in the place are in their sixties or seventies. My aunt said she even recognized one of the waiters as one of the waiters who served them in their youth. That certain loyalty amazes me.

In less than five minutes tops, we have in front of us a big bowl of hot beef mami and a hefty piece of special siopao each. The special mami costs P90 (good for three pax) while the siopao is priced at P50 apiece. The asado siopao was really good, produced in old school bamboo steamers, which is why it has a slight crust that one can remove. I didn't remove mine. It's very unlike the sio pao produced at the dimsum stalls in the mall and the stuffing is generous. I only finished half of the siopao and I asked the waiter to wrap it so I can take it home.

Their beef mami, to our surprise still tastes like the mami we enjoyed from memory. The broth is still delicately seasoned and hearty while the noodles are tender and never soggy. Soy sauce or a dash of pepper can be added according to one's taste. The marriage of simple flavors can impact one's taste buds in a big way. It’s no wonder that even noted food columnists and foodies (like Sandy Daza and the late Doreen Fernandez) swear by Ma Mon Luk's legendary beef mami, saying it's the best amongst the lot. That I agree to.

Simple food. Simple pleasures.

View from Thirty

2007-04-20T14:16:00.001+08:00

I’m thirty. There. I said it with utmost conviction and finally ‘twas not as painful to my ears anymore. Claims on how time flies or the incessant yearning for lost youth (and lost waistlines and among other things *wink*) were but clichés, though I grudgingly admit that they do have a certain truism. After all, it’s human nature’s approach to come into terms with milestones in life.

My bestfriend said that it’s just a novelty. Personally, it’s the melancholy that comes with the realization that a decade has passed by with most of my memories enwrapped in a hazy and somewhat distant veil, except for the handful of stories, friends and relationships that either brought me utmost joy or agonizing pain… now all a part of my very own oral history.

I am extremely fluky. I graduated college despite the three-year delay due to the need to maintain a full-time job that I almost flunked my Spanish 20 class. Neat. I’ve experienced the grown-up joy and the torture of paying my very own credit card. I was blessed to survive a fatal health crisis by the skin of my teeth. I’m also extremely fortunate to have survived employment in six different companies before landing my current job.

I do remember that my first job paid me P18.50/hour as a research slave for a foreign national who rewarded me with additional work whenever we finished ten meetings in a day. Haha. Despite my meager salary, I appreciated the value of a job, of waking up early in the morning and fixing my desk diligently at the end of each day.

The best part of my twenties was the many friendships formed with interesting and intelligent individuals: many endured and continue to this day, while some I had to let go for various reasons that would be too personal to disclose. So while I feel good and have nothing to feel ashamed about in my 20s…there’s also this nagging feeling of melancholia about the things I haven’t done yet and have all now come to pass, never to be given a chance to do so again. There are so many things I would like to accomplish, in my career and my personal life before my time on earth is over that sometimes it felt like I’m way behind life’s race.

About a decade ago, thirty was a number I associated with old people – of osteoporosis, wrinkles and gray hair. Now, I’m in that magic circle. Does that mean that it’s now a downward slide into the abyss? Lola Maring, my beloved grandmother spoke of an answer of which I didn’t grasp the full meaning until now. Bratty me, I was always complaining of doing chores and questioning her wisdom on learning new things, I would stress this by saying it’s for oldies. To me she would always reply back: “you’re only young once but you’re only as old as you think.” How right she was.

Still, I can’t conjure or wish time would stand still for me. Throngs of people have been graceful enough to turn thirty before me. After all, life is à souhait.

Faith

2007-02-25T18:40:00.001+08:00

When I resigned from the call center job, I have no choice but to weigh my options. I was accepted twice for several positions I applied for but it just didn’t panned out. I was so out of sync and restless that I have to resign again and look for another job. Though I have a small business, I tried other avenues to support and earn a little income by writing freelance, something that I quite enjoyed. But as the days stretched into weeks, scary thoughts flooded my head: what will become of me ten years from now, my mortality, financial security, etc.

I began to ponder about the dreams I used to have when I was looking at the world like the innocent that I was. Sometimes I miss her, that girl with the big dreams, as I try in vain to connect her with the adult I had become. I was spiralling for another big blue. It’s one of those feelings that I can’t confide with anyone, to my family or to my friends. I was frightened that I had already lived my best life and in the end discerned it was worthless. I was frightened I have nothing more to give.

That was the moment I knew I needed guidance and direction. I am not an overtly religious person but I have been brought up with the notion that there are certain things that cannot be explained with rational thinking. That’s where faith comes in. I prayed and waited patiently for an answer. In the succeeding weeks, I applied and went to so many job interviews and exams that I have lost count.

The funny thing was I intentionally didn’t show up for one job interview but I was given a second chance. I went there without any expectations, thinking the outcome will be the same as the others. All the other applicants for the position seemed to have the same qualifications as I have, some looked darned too gorgeous that I thought it would be another beauty contest. Well ho, I was wrong. I got the job the same day, without any effort or going though any exams. It was by far the easiest job I clinched: I got it in two interviews. The thrilling part was that I was offered more than I initially asked for and the benefits are really, really good: mobile phones, international and local travel, bonuses, profit sharing schemes and even a car plan after several years of tenure. And my boss was the nicest, low maintenance person I’ve ever have the chance to serve. I want to pinch myself.

I may be profoundly cynical in my usual dealings with life but somehow with everything that has happened in the past few weeks, I accepted it for what it was: an intervention from Him. I got what I wanted and needed: that elusive perfect job. The one thing I was hoping and dreaming for after several months of anxiety and misery. And I’m thankful. Utterly thankful.

New Year Disillusion

2007-01-08T08:51:00.001+08:00

My Ma’s stepbrother eloquently summarized the event otherwise known as New Year: “ang tagal hinintay, isang minuto lang…tapos na”. And there I was slaving myself in front of the stove trying to wing my way into cooking the perfect roast beef that Jamie Oliver promised on the boobtube – without the help of an oven thermometer (yep, I lost mine), while protecting my precious ears with a pair of ear plugs against the war zone created by the neighbors lighting up pla-plas. At one point I asked myself why people go through the same agony to welcome another lackluster year – which is the reality despite assurances, GDP improvement and economic growth that GMA and her cohorts proclaim through PowerPoint presentations and media gimmickry.

To recap the previous year, any bright spots like victories by Filipinos in several sports fields are dimmed because of the utter shamelessness of the government policies and of course its dirty executives – the disregard sovereignty over the transfer of a convicted US citizen, the railroading of a constitutional assembly to prolong the term of the incumbents amidst the devastation and suffering left by Reming, the countless alleged (and most likely true) anomalies by the members of the First Family, political killings and even a water throwing incident. This year might even top last year’s roster of horrors, since it’s election year…expect more gore and killings as politicians will try to vie their machineries against one another in the coliseum of Philippine politics.

For us ordinary citizens, expect a year of hardships as more and more Filipinos will join the unemployed, despite the proclamation of the government that it has created millions of jobs, especially in the BPO sector. Take it from me, call center jobs are not for everyone and if you’re the type who can’t take verbal abuse or the offbeat hours, think ahead and pass. Now, for people like me who are still looking for the typical office day job, here’s an insight: it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there. Prepare thyself for rejection because there are companies who will give you that look that means “you’re not from this ritzy-ditzy school we preferred”, “you don’t have experience”, “you’re not ‘yuppie’ enough for our tastes” and “you’re over the age we specified”. Of all things, I hate the latter because in other countries, you could sue a company for discriminating against your age; unfortunately, last time I checked…we don’t have that clause in our labor laws, so swallow the degradation and pray their share prices fall in the following weeks. Nyahaha. One could always opt to seek their fortunes in some sandy Arab state or go hide and seek in a G4 country…if you could afford the air fare and travel expenses. By doing so, you will contribute to the dollar reserve of the country while adding to the brain drain.

Haven’t I said it plainly enough? This country is still on its way to the gallows.

An Undeniable Truth

2006-12-11T15:43:00.002+08:00

I, like many others have noticed the blistering heat of today’s summers as compared to the mild ones I’ve enjoyed in my childhood. Way back then, as early as September the air was already cool especially during mornings, signaling the approaching holiday season. Currently, it’s already December and it still feels like summer. Strong typhoons in the category of “Reming” and “Milenyo” used to wreck the Philippines every ten to twenty years. Now, these destructive forces visit in the span of a few months. Ever wondered why?

I have just finished watching Al Gore’s “An Inconvenient Truth” and I’d say after doing so, I’m now an advocate. Some detractors dismissed the film as doomsday tactics, another big hoax. Is it? No, it’s just an awkward reality that many politicians would rather sweep under the carpet, meant to be forgotten as against more “urgent” issues like national security, war, economic policies and so on.

Unfortunately for us, the truth will continue to haunt us in the form of unforgiving climate systems, sweltering heat waves and rising water levels that can devastate and gobble up city after city, state after state, nation after nation; displace millions of people and killing thousands of others in the process.

Doomsday will be the scenario if the problem staring at our faces is not curtailed and addressed. Even Superman’s polar hideaway will be destroyed at the rate the ice caps are melting. If this happens, we will have a new map of the world, folks.

What can you do? Understand the issue first. Don’t take my word for it. Obtain a copy and watch this documentary or go to www.climatecrisis.net. You can also read peer-reviewed articles about it. Immerse yourself with the concern. Be passionate. Be vigilant. Be conscious. Your life will depend on it.