SlapAStory - Latest Stories

Chapter 6: The Escape (Part 2)

2009-07-02T11:34:50Z

Asta turns to me and nods. I stand up, grab my bags, and walk to her. She takes my arm and guides me to the door. She bends down to grab her bag, roughly the same size as mine, and puts on her coat. Delicately, she buttons it up and pulls up her hood. I pull my own hood close to my face. She pulls open her door and cold morning air brushes our faces.

Asta leans in and whispers to me, “Pull your hood closer to your face. Hold onto me; I will guide you. I do not want anybody in the village to see you.” I obey her request and hold my hood so close that I cannot see. My feet stumble over the cobblestone of the streets of the village. I hear the rising rumble of activity in the village. Merchants preparing to move their merchandise to the market; the butcher slicing meat for the day’s purchases; store owners unlocking their shops’ doors; windows opening to let dust out from cleaning.

“Look down and do not speak. There are two men stopping people to talk with them. I will try my best to avoid them.” I sharpen my hearing to try to hear the men. I hear the two talking to a woman.

One man with a deep voice speaks. “Have you seen a girl, about the age of fifteen or sixteen? Red hair? Green eyes? Most likely with someone in this village.”

“I am sorry. I have not seen anybody that fits that description.”

The man with the deep voice continues. “Miss, it is extremely important that we find this girl. Think about all the people you have see this morning. Now, have you seen this girl?”

“Like I said before, I have not seen any girl that fits your description.”

The second man joins in with a hateful voice. “You did not even take time to think. Either you think long and hard about every single face that you have seen between last night and now or my friend and I will take you to the palace to Queen Darya herself where you can explain that you lied to her most trusted guards!”

The woman is silent, probably with fear. Asta has stopped us across the road from them to let me find out more from their conversation. The men sound familiar, but I cannot place a name to the voices. The woman breaks her silence in a shaky tone and a hint of sarcasm. “I am truly sorry, but I have not seen anyone except my husband, sons, and you two fine gentlemen.”

The men start talking amongst themselves. The first man speaks low so it will be hard for eavesdroppers to hear, but I manage to understand what they are saying. “Son, she has not seen the girl. There is no use in frightening her. We should just move on to the next person.”

The second man responds with eager passion. “Fine. I have a feeling that she is close by. I do not want any of these simple-minded peasants to undermine our authority. Half of them are related to those filthy-blooded gypsies in Meridia. I am so relieved Queen Darya sent all the ones living here back to Meridia. Now they will not pollute the blood of the true people of Catríona.” I feel Asta stiffen, probably from the comment about the gypsies. The second man continues. “Look over there. There are a couple of young girls we can question.”

“Do not lose your temper this time!”

I hear Asta’s soft voice through her teeth. “We need to move, now!” Her steps begin and move faster with each step. A voice calls from behind us.

“Excuse me, misses. We need to ask you some important questions!” Asta slows her pace and whispers in my ear.

“Pretend like you are crying. I will do the talking. Make sure your face is covered the entire time.” I obey her words and pretend that I am crying on her shoulder. The two men catch up with us.

The first man starts. “Excuse me, but where are you two young ladies going this early in the morning? And what is wrong with your friend here?”

Asta’s voice is confident and foolproof. “My friend’s mother died in Meridia last week. She was very close to her mother and losing her, as you can imagine, is very painful. I am taking her to the ports so she can attend the funeral. I have heard that it takes almost a day’s journey to get to the ports; we are leaving this early to get there by sunset. Would you mind if we sat down on this bench. My friend is very upset.”

“Of course, we just need to ask you a couple of questions and you can be on your way. Have you seen a girl, about the age of fifteen or sixteen? Red hair? Green eyes? She is most likely with someone in this village.” Asta guides me to sit down on a bench behind us. I pretend to cry harder into her shoulder.

“Red hair? I thought only gypsies had red hair and that Queen Darya put all those filthy gypsies back in Meridia.”

The second man talks. “I like the way you think, uh, what is your name again?”

“My name is Shira.”

The first man breaks in. “Shira, then, have you seen this girl? Has your friend seen the girl?”

“Sorry, neither one of us has seen the girl. My friend has been preparing for her mother’s funeral. Now, if you do not mind, we best be leaving if we want to get to the ports by today.”

The second man speaks in a flirtatious way. “Thank you for helping us out, Shira. When you get back from your trip to the ports, look me up.”

“What is your name, handsome?” Asta responds in the same flirtatious manner.

“I am Emery.” Suddenly I recognize the voices. The man with the deep voice is Holden, a sweet, older man who works as a guard for Queen Darya. The second man is his son, Emery. Emery is known throughout the palace for his quick temper and his violent tendencies.

“Emery, stop wasting time with each person we question! We have the rest of the village to search.”

“Sorry, Father. I was just enticed by Shira’s beauty. Hurry back from the ports, Shira.” I feel Emery reach for Asta’s hand. He pulls it out and I hear him kiss it.

“I will be back before next week, Emery.” Asta reels her hand back.

“Emery, there is a suspicious group over this way. Make sure you do not lose your temper or they might find out that we are on to them!”

“Coming, Father.”

Their footsteps go off in the distance. I whisper to Asta, “We need to leave before they decide to come back and question me.” We stand up from the bench and I remove my head from her shoulder. We move away from the village. Asta’s pace quickens on a foreign path to the ports; I follow with the same speed. Our feet condense the snow beneath us.

“Lia, you can take off your hood now.” I obey and am relieved for the velvet to be away from my head. The sky is free of clouds, so the sun beats down on our heads. At first, I have to squint to adjust to the sunlight. I release my arm from Asta’s and walk steadily. I look around to see nothing but rolling hills covered in fresh snow and a blue sky; the only sign of civilization is the road on which we are walking. By the position of the sun, it is about noon. Asta’s hood is also off and her bangles are clinking with joy. Her dark blue dress appears brighter in the sunlight.

“Thank you so much Asta. You did a great job thinking quickly when Emery and Holden were questioning us.”

“You know them?”

“Yes. Holden is really a sweet man, but he must follow Queen Darya’s orders. He does not know any other way. Emery, on the other hand, is horrible. He is known throughout the palace for his quick temper and violent nature. He also flirts with every single maiden in the palace.”

“He is a creep. Did you hear what he was saying about gypsies? I could not believe him. And then he tried to flirt with me. My skin was crawling when he kissed my hand.” We giggle at the thought of Emery flirting with her.

“How did you come up with the name Shira? It sounds foreign.” Asta slows down and takes a more serious face.

“It is my mother’s name. She is a gypsy. She was shipped off to Meridia a few months after Celeste was born. The three of us were not taken with her because we are only half gypsy. Our father, Avni, was born and raised in Catríona, a farmer all his life. Zarif and Celeste have our father’s looks, but I have my mother’s. I guess I am the oddball. Anyway, I go to market with our fresh produce and some jewelry my mother made and left behind. She made the locket you bought that day. She made it right after Celeste was born. I think she knew that she was going to be taken away soon.”

“I am so sorry, Asta, about your mother and buying Celeste’s locket. If I had any Asta smiles at her fond memories.

“Do not worry so much, Lia. It is not your fault my mother was taken away. She is probably living happily along the coast, selling her jewelry there. We better get moving along. We are moving like a couple of turtles!”

My face twists into confusion. “Turtles? What are turtles?”

“You do not know what turtles are?”

“I have never heard of such a word. What are they?”

“Turtles are creatures that live in and out of water. Some are so big that you can ride their backs. Others are so small that they could fit in your palm. When they are on land, they move very slowly,” She slows her speech and movements to add emphasis. I laugh at her exaggerations and she continues at her regular pace, “but when they are in water, they swim very quickly. They are all over the streets in Meridia, or at least that what my mother used to tell Zarif and I when we were younger. She also said that turtles are wise and that you should never harm them.”

“What do these turtles look like?”

“Well, they are green, like the sea. And they have hard shells that surround their bodies with holes for their heads and legs. My mother also told us that the world started out on the back of a giant turtle. The ancient gypsies lived on her back, groomed all the plants, and ate the fallen fruit; in return, she would swim around the world to keep them warm in the winter. One day, a gypsy fell off her back and the other gypsies blamed her. She was offended deeply, so she dug her feet into the bottom of the ocean and made land rise. She dumped the gypsies on the land and disappeared into the sea forever. The only way she will come back is if someone calls out her name to the sea, but nobody has ever remembered her name.”

“That sounds incredible. I really want to see a turtle now.” I jump up and down in excitement, causing Asta to smile even bigger.

“When we get to Meridia, we will see so many turtles that they will become an eyesore.”

“I do not think anything so foreign and enchanting could become an eyesore.” I hear a faint rumble and look up to the sky. No clouds. “Did you hear that soft thunder clap, Asta. It sounds like a storm is heading this way.” Asta starts an uncontrollable round of laughter. Her laughing causes me to laugh, but I eventually stop to ask, “What is so funny, Asta?”

She calms her laughter and answers, “That was not far off thunder. That was my stomach. I ate too fast and now I am starving. Maybe we should stop now to have our lunch now.” I blush in embarrassment in saying that her stomach sounded like thunder, but then silently laugh it off. We veer off the road onto the grass and open the sack containing our lunches.

Chapter 6: The Escape

2009-07-02T11:33:59Z

What is taking Penelope so long? What if Queen Darya found out that she told me to flee? What if she killed Penelope for telling me? I cannot control my frantic thoughts. To busy my mind, I button up my winter coat Rasha made me the previous year. The forest green velvet is trimmed with silver thread. Reminiscing, I finger the soft hood and almost completely forget what is happening. The slowly creaking door interrupts and brings me back to the present. My heart beats faster with anxiety. The familiar face of Penelope peeks around the corner and whispers, “Lia, leave now! Everyone is asleep. You must escape while you have the optimum opportunity!” I take my bags without hesitation and quickly exit the room. Penelope follows with hurried footsteps and throws her neck around at every corner.

“Leave through the kitchen door. It will be faster and safer.” We head to the kitchen, which is as empty as before. We reach the door we once left to see the new world of the market. So much has happen since then, it is hard to believe we saw a glimpse of the outside world two months ago. We pause in frightened silence at the door.

“Promise me you will be safe.”

“I promise I will be safe and I promise I will return soon to see you again.” My body automatically hugs Penelope. She hugs back and strokes tears into my hair, but then quickly pulls back.

“You must leave before everyone wakes up.” We hold hands for the last time and she puts a small piece of parchment in my hand. She pulls me so her lips are in my ear. “Open it when it is safe,” she whispers. I nod and wipe the tears away. I open the door and moonlight floods the kitchen. I look behind me to say good-bye to Penelope once more, but she is gone. I tuck her note with the rest of my possessions. I step out of the door and quietly pull the door closed. At once, the frigid air beleaguers my lungs and brushes my face with frost, forcing me to pull my hood up.

My feet move swiftly towards the bridge. The moon shimmers off the water, guiding me to my freedom. Silhouettes of rolling hills frame the vacant market. To the right of the market are quaint houses with snow perched on the roofs contain sleeping inhabitants. I pause to see my breath before me and then I spot Asta’s from the top of the hill; it is the farthest and smallest house in the little village. I briskly move on the path to walk through the village. Once I set foot on the uneven cobblestones laden with powdery snow, I creep quietly in the shadows. I look around the settled houses and little stores. To my right is a butcher shop followed by ten tall and narrow homes. To my left is the same, but a fabric shop is in the middle of the ten. After the tenth house, the cobblestone breaks and goes in four directions; I continue forward. More tall and narrow homes loom above me. All the windows are shut from the frigid air and snow. My nose grows more numb and I can see my breath more with each step towards Asta’s home.

At last, my frightened feet pause at the gate of Asta’s home. I try to push the gate open, but it does not move. I try pulling it but with little success. I move my fingers blindly to feel for a latch. I move my hand from the left side to the right and find a dirt-covered latch. I pull it off and pull the gate open. The garden laid before the house is covered with snow. Places where summer’s harvest are now barren with frozen earth. I follow the stone path in between the sections of the garden to the door. Clouds are now blocking moonlight. I knock softly on the door, hoping Asta hears it. Suddenly, I notice the cold and start shivering. I knock again, but a little louder; my hands then fall to my sides. I try to make my hands go to my mouth to warm up, but I am too cold to move. I hear muffled footsteps coming closer. I become frightened once more. What if it is not Asta who is coming to the door? What if who ever opens the door turns me in? What will happen to me then? I do not want Queen Darya to kill me! I hear the door open and a shadow about the same height as me whispers. “Who is there?”

“It is Lia from the palace. Please let me come inside and I will explain everything.”

“Of course, Lia! Hurry, come inside, it is warmer in here. Let me fetch a candle so we can see where we are going. Just wait right here.” The shadow pulls me in and closes the door, forcing the cold air out. The shadow leaves and I can hear it rummaging for a candle and a match. I hear the match strike and then I see a growing light not too far away. The shadow changes into the warm face of Asta. She motions me to come and sit. I move my legs, as much as they are sore, to the place she is beckoning me to go. The moment I reach her, my legs give way and I collapse onto the small couch. Asta places the candle on a table in front of her. She places a blanket on my lap.

“Lia, sit down and wrap this blanket around you. Let me make you some warm tea. Oh my, your lips are blue. Just rest a bit.” She scurries into another room and I dive into the thick blanket. I start to drift off to sleep, but then Asta comes back and hands me a piping hot cup. She takes a seat on a stool across from me.

“Drink some tea first and then you can explain to me what is going on.” I press the steamy cup to my chapped lips and tip it up. Hot liquid fills my mouth and I swallow. It goes down and makes my whole body warm.

“Thank you so much, Asta.”

“I told you I would be here for you anytime.”

“I need your help to leave for the ports tomorrow.”

“Is everything alright?”

“No, Queen Darya wants to kill me. She told Penelope that she was going to kill me tomorrow. Penelope told me that I needed to come here and seek your help. Please help me.”

“Of course I will help you. Queen Darya will not know that you are gone until morning. For now, get some rest because the ports are at least a day’s journey away. I will tell my family that I will be going with you in the morning. Good night, Lia.”

“Thank you so much, Asta.” Asta blows out the candle and leaves me on the couch. I take one last sip of the tea and then place it next to the candle. I close my eyes and drift off to a dream in a warm and safe cocoon.

Queen Darya is sitting at her desk working hard. A healthier Rasha enters the room and carries a tray of warm tea and a small cake. She places it next to Queen Darya’s stack of parchment and her body stays. Her small voice starts. “Queen Darya,” she is interrupted by a cough, but then continues. “Queen Darya.” Queen Darya looks up from her work.

“Yes, Rasha.”

“My daughter, Penelope is getting married to the gardener, Yuri. The wedding will be in three days.”

“Why are you telling me this Rasha? You know your daughter may marrying whom ever she wishes. Was that not part of our agreement?”

“Yes, Queen Darya. I want to make a deal with you though.”

Queen Darya places her quill down and focuses on Rasha. “What kind of a deal?”

Rasha paces in front of Queen Darya’s desk. Queen Darya breaks a small piece of the cake off and pushes it between her ruby red lips. She lets it melt in her mouth while she sips the tea. “I want you to stay away from the wedding.”

Queen Darya puts the cup of tea back on the tray. “Rasha, are you forgetting our agreement completely?”

Rasha coughs, but answers. “No, Queen Darya, but…”

“Rasha, our agreement was that Penelope could marry anybody she wanted as long as I attended the wedding. In return, you could take care of Rosalia. I still have no why you would want to care for that filthy girl.”

Rasha suddenly has more power in her voice and defends her actions. “Queen Darya, you forced me to kill my best friend and leave her daughter motherless! The least I could do is look after Rosalia as if she was my own.”

Queen Darya stands up and knocks over her cup of tea. The escaped tea fills nearby parchment, but she does not even notice. “Rasha, do not ever raise your voice to me again!”

Rasha coughs and returns to her shyness. “I am sorry, Queen Darya. I would like to make an alteration in our agreement.”

“What do you want?”

“In exchange for not coming to Penelope’s wedding, Penelope will take my place once I die.”

Queen Darya looks down at her desk and sits down, deep in thought. “There needs to be something else.”

Rasha coughs once more. “Once I die, you can kill Rosalia.”

Queen Darya’s eyes grow larger. “Rasha, you have been protecting Rosalia from me her whole life. Why would you let me kill her?”

“I will be dead and I will not be able to see any more of your destruction.” Rasha pauses and adds, “Just remember that it was not Rosalia who slept with King Rian. She is not at fault for her mother’s mistake.” She turns away and leaves Queen Darya to collect the spilt tea.

“Lia, wake up before my family does. We need to prepare to leave.” Asta is shaking my body and I quickly wake. “We need to eat breakfast and make a lunch if we want to reach the ports by tonight.” I break free from my cocoon and follow Asta to the kitchen. I look around her house in dawn’s light; it makes the house much different from last night’s encounters. The floor is smooth stone and the walls are made of sun-dried bricks. The room where the couch was moves into a hallway with three doors at the end. The small couch I slept on is part of a circle of stools and wooden chairs. I count five seats. The kitchen is open and big. In the middle is a wooden table with a bench on each side. A tall wooden chair is at one end, but the other end is empty. I look at Asta. She is wearing a dark blue working dress and a purple apron. Her hair is up in a bun. Her feet are bare and her wrists adorned with bangles. She pulls two plates out of a cabinet and puts a cooked egg on each one, followed by a steaming biscuit.

“I hope this is enough. I did not have time to make anything else. My family will be awake soon for morning chores, so let me do the talking. Eat quickly and have your things ready.” I take my plate from her and nod. She sits down on the bench closest to the garden and shovels her breakfast into her mouth. I sit on the bench opposite of her and scoop the egg into my mouth. For ten minutes, there is no sound other than the clinking of forks on plates and teeth. Then, a little girl starts wondering to the kitchen from the door on the left of the hallway. The girl is about six years old with soft blonde hair tucked away in two braids. She is rubbing the sleepiness out of her eyes as she moves closer to the kitchen. Asta, noticing me looking at something behind her, turns to see who is now awake. She swallows her chewed biscuit and calls out, “Celeste, your breakfast is not ready yet. Go get dressed and wait for Father.” Celeste turns around and goes back into the door on the left.

“That should buy us some more time. Are you finished?” I nod and let her take my plate. I have not eaten any meal this fast before. My jaw is sore from chewing so much so quickly. Asta starts preparing our lunches. “Do you care for oranges?”

“Oranges are fine. I will eat anything you put in for my lunch.” Her little body moves swiftly making double lunches. I return to the couch to retrieve my bags. I sit down on the couch and then hear a door from the hall open. I wait to see who it could be. I quickly glance at Asta and see that she is trying to see who it is. She calls out again, “Zarif, get dressed for your chores. I need you to do mine today as well.”

A tall, strong built body emerges from the hall. His dirty blonde hair is short. He looks a couple of years older than Asta. His deep voice rings through the room. “Let me eat some breakfast if I am doing your chores, Asta.” He looks over to the couch, spots me, and then looks back at Asta. I freeze. “Who is she? Does Father know that she is here?”

“This is my friend, Lia. I need to travel with her to the ports today. Let me explain this to Father, okay Zarif.” Now Asta is packaging out lunches. Zarif moves to the kitchen in his tattered robe. His skin is tan, like Asta’s, from working in the sun. He starts to make eggs, just like Asta made us for breakfast. Asta brings two sacks to me and then speaks softly so Zarif does not hear.

“Let me talk to my father in private. As soon as he meets you, he will let us depart. Make sure you are ready to leave at a moment’s notice.” I nod and put our lunches in the sack with my clothes. Asta leaves for one of the doors in the hallway and Zarif finishes making his eggs. I hold my hands tightly on my lap, waiting for Asta to return. The tall tower of Zarif’s body appears over my shoulder. I look up and see that he is chewing on half of a biscuit. He swallows hard and then speaks slowly and deeply. “So, you are Asta’s friend, right?” I nod. “My name is Zarif. What is yours?”

My voice is timid and small. “Lia.”

“Nice name. Where are you from? I have never seen you in the village or the market.”

Not wanting to give away too many details about myself, I try to be very vague. “The little village by the palace. Not very many people live over there.”

“If you do not mind my asking, why are you leaving for the ports? I mean it is very difficult to get to any place by water.”

“I am running away from…my stepmother. She used to beat me and wants to kill me now. She is terrified of water, so she will not chase me herself.”

“I see. Well, Godspeed, Lia. You will need it. Looks like Asta is back from talking with our father. Nice meeting you, Lia.” Zarif walks back to clean his place in the kitchen and Asta comes into view holding the hand of Celeste. Celeste is holding on to Asta’s hand tightly with one hand and the other hand is curled into a fist with her thumb stuck in her mouth.

“Zarif, please come here. I need to speak to all three of you.” A tall, strong built man emerges from the hallway. He is wearing dirty slacks and a clean buttoned up shirt. His gray hair is kept short, like Zarif’s. Zarif is a younger version of the man, presumably his father. All three gather around Asta in the middle of the room where I am sitting.

Asta looks around and talks softly. “If anybody comes here and asks about Lia, do not tell them that she was here. Do not tell any of your friends that she was here. It is very important for the lives of both of us that you keep quiet. With that being said, I will probably have to set sail with Lia because the people looking for her know who I am. I will write to you as soon as it is safe. Do not worry, Celeste. We will be well. We will come back when the time is right. Now give me a hug before we go.” Asta bends down on her knee and gives Celeste a big hug and a gentle kiss on her cheek. Celeste returns the hug, but is silently crying because she will miss her sister. Asta stands back up and hugs Zarif. Zarif hugs her back and kisses her on the cheek. Asta turns to her father to give him a hug, but he grabs her and lifts her off her feet. He kisses her hard on her cheek and sets her back on her feet.

Amendments - II

2009-07-01T20:31:58Z

II
It was raining that day when she had spent hours crying at home because Daniel had gone out of town without telling her. It was their anniversary the next day and she had made plans for it. This was not the first time he had done this to her. It had been happening for more than a year. All married couples had their own conflicts and so did Daniel and Megan. There were times when they argued to such an extent that she had to ask Daniel to sleep on the couch. There were times when they hated to come face to face. But, in the end everything was taken care of, sometimes by Daniel and sometimes by Megan. There were those special moments when they spent an extra time in bed, holding each other in tight embrace though it was time to get up and begin their day. There were times when having shower together washed away all their anger and frustration. But, past few weeks it was getting too much to handle. Megan was tired of being taken for granted. She felt that Daniel was under the impression that in the end she would forgive him like she had done all this time. This time, however, Megan thought she had to tell him that she could not be taken for granted. Last six months had been really tough for her, especially after her spontaneous abortion. Though, Daniel was in no way to be blamed for what had happened; Megan accused him of not being there for her. Daniel, too, had lost his temper and things had been blown out of proportion. They had not spoken to each other for weeks, till one day Megan took the initiative. It had more to do with guilt than about how she felt about Daniel. The doctors had confirmed the reason for spontaneous abortion as the defect in her uterus of not being able to hold the conceptus. After that major incident in their life, things had not recovered completely. A knot remained somewhere, deep inside, invisible to the naked eye but both of them could feel its presence in their life.
Megan wiped her tears and continued staring outside the window. Raindrops were forming various images on the glass. As she walked closer to the window she could see her own reflection in the glass. It asked her a question whether what she was going to do was the right thing. Megan did not have the answer. She did not want to think about it, she decided to flow with the tide. One meeting would not harm much, she concluded.
She turned around, picked up her purse and car keys and walked out of the house. She sat in the car for a while, gaining her composure. Finally, she started the ignition and drove out of the garage. Looking at the road ahead, through the wipers that pushed the rainwater back and forth she thought of the call she had received, yesterday. “Hello, Megan speaking” “Hi! It’s me, Chris”Megan was silent.“Hello, you there?”“Yes. Where did you get my number from?”“From your friend in café” Megan mentally cursed her friend for giving him the number.“She was glad to help when I told her that I was your school friend” Chris continued.“How have you been?” Megan asked“Let us talk about it over a cup of coffee”“I am sorry Chris, but I cannot.”“Please Megan; I have something important to tell you.”“I am really sorry, Chris.”“Just once, please.” Chris pleaded. “I will think over.” Megan said after a pause.“I will call you tomorrow” Chris said and disconnected the call.Megan had her reasons to refuse. Chris was her past she had forgotten and the one she did not wish to think about. She had made up her mind as soon as she kept her cell on the desk. She was not going to meet him.
As she drove carefully through various lanes, watching for the red light through the moving wipers, Megan could not believe that she had said yes to meet him when he had called up again. As she waited at the red light she looked through the rearview mirror, her past clearly visible in it.
Chris and she had been school friends. They spent a lot of time together, sharing their lives with each another. Their body language suggested that they were interested in each another and that they were just meant to be together. Neither one ever spoke of how they felt for the other. It was taken for granted. But things changed when Daniel came in Megan’s life. While returning from a party at night, Megan’s car had crashed and Daniel was the man who saved her from near death. As per what the attending nurse told Megan, Daniel had spent the entire night sitting by her bedside as Megan struggled to survive. When Chris came to know about the accident he rushed to the hospital to find Daniel sitting at the bedside. Chris introduced himself as Megan’s boyfriend and Daniel told him about the accident and the condition in which he had found Megan.Both of them waited for Megan to regain consciousness. When Megan was out of danger, Daniel wished her luck and walked away. Megan had not seen Daniel for a few days after that. But after a week, someone sent her a bouquet at her house. Her lips curved into a smile as she assumed that the bouquet was sent by Chris but she was surprised to learn that Daniel was the sender. The note read that Daniel wanted to meet her. For reasons even Megan did not know she accepted his invitation and they met at a restaurant. Daniel expressed his desire to know her even though he was aware that Chris and she were in a relationship. Despite her attempts to stay away from Daniel, despite convincing herself that Daniel was not her kind of man, Megan found herself being attracted towards Daniel. At the same time, deep down inside her heart she knew that Chris did not deserve what she was doing to him. But, Daniel did not give up and she had to admit that she was glad he did not. One day when they met at the riverside, as per their discussion on the phone, Daniel handed her the letter he had written for her and as she read it with tears in her eyes, she knew that though her life had taken an unexpected turn, she was meant to be with Daniel. The letter had a deep impact on her mind; even though she was not sure which part of the letter had that kind of influence on her. She moved towards Daniel and kissed him on his lips. Megan remembered how Chris had spotted them and stormed towards them and punched Daniel.
Honking of the cars brought Megan out of her thoughts. The light had turned green and others were waiting for her to move. Megan wheeled the car towards the café where she handled the accounts. As she parked her car in the parking lot she saw him standing at the entrance. He was the same man he had been when she had seen him last. The same features, the same athletic body and the same sorrow in his eyes.“Why did you do this to me?” Chris had asked her but she had no answer. Megan hoped that he would not ask her the same question again because she did not have the answer even now. It had just happened, as if it was meant to happen. She could hear the bells of heaven ringing when she had seen Daniel. She knew that they both were meant to be man and wife, in spite of the relation she shared with Chris. But how could she possibly explain it to Chris? She herself had found it to be strange. Megan applied light make-up before getting out of the car. Megan was unaware that her step to get out of the car would be responsible for the events that would change the course of her life.

Amendments - I

2009-06-29T19:11:18Z

Every night after finishing their dinner, Daniel and Megan loved spending time in each other’s arms. They spoke about each other’s day as Daniel put his arm around Megan and she placed her head on his shoulder. It was one of those little things that made their married life special. However, tonight was not one of those nights. They were in the hall but there was an invisible barrier between the two. Something they both had recognized for the past few days! No marriage is perfect, even theirs was not. There were ups and down in their married life, it was their “down” phase going on. The brightly lit room failed to illuminate the dark corner of Megan’s mind. The thoughts nibbling at the back of her mind were so obviously shown on her face that Daniel felt the heaviness in his chest. He loved his Meg, but lately things were shaping up from bad to worse.

Megan was standing at the window, looking outside. Daniel was seated on the couch, watching Megan. He always loved the way Megan’s hair rose and fell on her shoulders as the breeze whistled past her hair; that made her look sensuous. Even tonight, Daniel wanted to get up from the couch and hug her but she was not in the mood.

Daniel knew something was wrong and he had played a role in it. But he could not fathom the seriousness of the matter when Megan told him that she wanted a divorce. He had tried his best to make her understand, tried telling her how much he loved her, he had apologized for his mistakes of the past and promised her that he would not repeat his mistakes in future but nothing, absolutely nothing convinced her enough.

“There are some decisions in life that you should allow me to take on my own” Megan complained

“Fine, but I have the right to say something if it involves my life as well” Daniel explained.

“You just said your part, now let me take my decision” Megan said firmly.

Daniel exhaled; his shoulders drooped low as if burdened with tons of weight. That is how he was feeling lately.

“Fine” He finally gave up.

“I want a divorce” Megan said sitting down on the couch.

“Tell me something I do not know already” Daniel said rubbing his forehead.

“Fine, I want you to know that I am not really happy about this whole thing.”

“Then why do you want it?”

“Because …” Megan could not continue. She covered her face with her hands. Then taking a deep breath she said “Because I fear it is not going to work out this time.”

“It always has worked out all these times, has it not? We both have worked towards it. We will work on it together, this time too.” Daniel pleaded.

I wish it could work out this time too, Megan thought, aloud she said, “Not this time, Daniel.”

“You feel so after all these years of our marriage?” Daniel questioned

“Do you even remember how many years we have been married?” Megan said placing her hands on her hips.

“Six” Daniel replied immediately.

“Five” Megan corrected him

“I counted one year of courtship too.”

In spite of all their differences and the ups and downs in their life of past one and a half year, despite the harsh fact that their marriage was on the verge of breaking, Megan’s lips curved at the corners and tears welled up in her eyes.

“See!” Daniel exclaimed “I still affect you the way I used to! We can sail through this, trust me.”

Megan was silent, she wanted to trust him, she really wanted to. But she was not sure whether he would trust her this time, if she came out with the entire truth. There was a dark corner in her mind that did not let her sleep for past many weeks, she just wanted to get it out of her head but she could not. But in the end she had to, she reminded herself.

Daniel knew there was something that had been disturbing his wife. That was the reason he had secretly planned a vacation, taking time out of his busy schedule. He was aware that Megan was upset with him because he could not give enough time to her. He knew that she did not have any extraordinary expectations from him; she just wanted him to spend some time with her. During the courtship days Daniel had gone out of his way to make her feel special, even after their marriage, the first few years were special. He had done a lot of things others might consider crazy but Megan had loved it. The little things he did for her were the special feature of their married life. The next few years, Daniel failed to do those little things for her as he got busy in his work.

Megan had been tolerating for a long time, adjusting to his busy schedule, bouts of anger when things went wrong at work, his sudden change of plans, etc. She started complaining when it went beyond her tolerance levels. Daniel often apologized about his hectic schedule and promised that he would not repeat it but then took back to doing the same things again, after a few days. Megan, tired of complaining, took to her ways of dealing with it.

Her ways of dealing with it, Megan thought, turned out to be not what she had expected.

“Are you listening?” Daniel asked her

Coming out of her reverie Megan said, “Yes I am listening, Daniel. But the truth is that I just want to get out of this, for my good and for your good!”

“My good, are you kidding?” Daniel complained

“Just listen to what you are saying, Meg. Here I am trying to make you understand that I want to be married to you for the rest of my life and you are concluding that the divorce is what is in my best interest!” Daniel was confused.

“Wait a minute” Daniel said all of a sudden realizing something

“Am I missing something?” he asked.

“A lot” she wanted to say. “Things I did; things I should have not done.” Megan thought and closed her eyes.

“Just leave me alone for some time, Daniel” Megan said feeling exhausted.

Daniel got up and walked out of the room. Though Megan told Daniel that she wanted Divorce, she was not really happy about it, in fact she did not want to consider the option but the events of recent past had forced her to think about divorce. She loved Daniel, she really loved him with all her heart and she could not imagine living a life with him that was full of guilt. Guilt, it was the main reason for her being upset.

Megan looked outside the window and visualized the events of the past that affected her present and would change her future, for the good or for the bad.

.... to be continued

The Silence

2009-06-29T06:09:12Z

Though I always pretended to be annoyed, I really loved the way he pronounced my name. It was never how others pronounced it, never the right way. He tried changing his voice so that I would not be able to recognize him, however, I always did. I still remember the day when he had called me up pretending to be a woman…

“Hi RTee, I am Sharon from Kingfisher airlines, you have just won a two days and three nights trip to Australia. Could you please come down to our office with your documents to collect the tickets?”

“No, thank you Mathew but I am not interested.” I said and Mathew whispered something under his breath and hung up. I burst out laughing holding the phone in my hand. The line went dead but I felt so … ‘alive’. I looked around; everyone in my office was staring at me with surprise. They had their reasons. All these people were more of friends than just colleagues and almost everyone knew the story. It was after so many months that they had seen me laughing, I had not even smiled all these months and everyone knew why. Putting up a smiling mask during board meetings was one thing and ‘really’ smiling was another. Something I could not do after my break up with Sameer. It was a story known to all in the office. Everyone in the office, including me, thought that Sameer and I would be getting married. I was dead sure about it after spending the night with Sameer and doing what my mum would call as ‘crossing the limits’. But it was not meant to be that way. People were surprised to know about our break up and I was devastated, especially because of the excuse he used.

“I love you, Arti, I really do but …”

My thoughts were interrupted by the loud ding coming from my computer speakers. Mathew was online at Gtalk.

Mathew: I hate you …

I laughed out loud again. This time my colleagues looked at me and smiled. I smiled back.

I: You just made my day, Mathew :)

Mathew: I am glad I did. But still, I hate you…

I: Maybe someday I will not recognize you.

Mathew: I know that day would never come RTee.

I: Come on, at least spell my name correctly!

Mathew: Gotta go, RTee. Catch you later, just wanted to interrupt your thoughts.

I: What do you mean?

Mathew: You know very well what I mean. Bye.

And he logged out.

The fact that Mathew knew what I would be thinking seemed a bit scary to me back then but today as I think about that day, it seems to be so … normal. I had wondered whether my actions / reactions had become so predictable but then I realized that it was just him. The way he took care of me when I was trying to come out of the shock and pain of the break up, he was a witness to my bouts of all sorts of emotions and he had become used to my way of thinking. However, there was one thing he could never see it coming. One thing he could not believe to have happened with me … about him. He could never predict that I would fall in love with him someday. To tell you the truth, this was something even I had not imagined to have happened in the wildest of my dreams but it happened and I am happy about it. I am glad that I fell in love with someone like Mathew, a man who offered a smile when someone needed it, even though he was breaking from within. He was breaking from within, the cancer was eating him from within and no one knew about it. I, of the all people, who spent so much time with him, both offline and online, was completely unaware of it until the day he told me about it because he had no other option. I hate to admit that I was so ignorant of his illness. There were times when he did not come online for a chat or even call me. Instead of calling him to check whether everything was fine, I spent time crying over what Sameer had done to me.

I finally learned about his illness the day I told him how much I loved him. He tried to convince me saying that it was mere infatuation but when he realized I had made up my mind, he said, “RTee, you cannot fall in love with someone like me.”

This time, the way he pronounced my name did not make me smile. It made me cry, especially after what he told me that night.

His illness did not change my decision, but it changed me. Completely!

I learned to live because of Mathew. Taking in every moment, breathing in every happiness, which came my way. Despite Mathew’s continuous refusals we got married one month after I told him how I felt about him. Though I had once told Mathew that a day would come when I would not recognize him, I had not wanted it to happen this way. During the end stages of his cancer, every night as I looked at him, I saw a weaker Mathew. One night as I bent over him to kiss him good night I could not stop my tears from rolling down my cheeks. When Mathew said that he loved me, the voice seemed to be coming from someone else’s vocal chords. Mathew’s health kept on deteriorating and finally he walked away from me to be with me forever, beyond the limitations of time and space.

Today, as I stand next to his grave, one year after he left me, I feel the same way I had felt that day. I feel … happy.

I believe - when there is nothing we have to say, the best thing to do is to feel the silence. When it feels good we know that everything is fine, when it does not feel good we know that there is something that needs to be taken care of.

Standing here – the silence feels good and it makes me smile. I am happy to know that our love is still the way it was when he was around.

The Death of Michael Jackson King of Pop 1958-2009

2009-06-27T01:09:16Z

On the 26th of June 2009,

When the morning in the UK where I'm from was beautiful with sunshine,

My Mum told me some sad news that Michael Jackson's dead,

I was so sad I can't get the grief out my head.

He died yesterday from myocardial infarction,

After taking Demerol, a powerful painkilling injection.

Does infarction and injection rhyme

as this time?

His songs used to rhyme

in his life time.

I will remember his songs when he lived and I was glad,

Which were Billie Jean, Beat It, Black and White, Scream and Bad.

But the most inportant song I will remember

Was his most famous song of all, Thriller.

Elvis Presley's king of rock and rock and maybe 50 cents's king of hip hop,

But as for Micheal Jackson, he was the king of pop.

The World is sad that Michael Jackson's life is at a dead end,

He was not only the pop king and god, he was also the World's bestest friend.

We will miss, love and never forget you Michael Jackson,

As your now in heaven with god and Jesus in the clouds with the shining sun

And in the sky which is the colour blue

And your pet chimpanzee Bubbles is waiting for you.

RIP Michael Jackson

Amen

Road Trip

2009-06-26T18:32:06Z

"They can take our lives but they can never take our freedom!!" yelled our fat, bald history teacher Mr Cavanagh, he's an angry, 47 year old virgin who still lives with his mum...well that's what I heard. He was trying to tell us that this 'famous' quote was from some war but everyone knows it's from Braveheart. I'm in Year 12 and it's the last day of school..THANK GOD!! I think the only hard thing will be leaving my beautiful Nikki.. She's going away to college straight after school to be a fashion designer, at least I'll get to see her in the holidays.

Anyway.. my name's Jake Mitchell, I'm 18 and most people would refer to me as the 'popular' kid of our school, St Vincents College in Cobram... its near Yarrawonga. I don't get the term popular? Well I guess I do have the hottest girlfriend and I'm the captain of the footy team but I don't think that means anything. I've lived here practically my whole life well since I was 3, and pretty much ever since then I've been riding motorbikes, fishing in the river and anything else imaginable with my best mate Alex. We are pretty much the same, its just he's vice captain of the footy team and has the second hottest chick as a girlfriend!

I live with my mum and step-dad, Steve. My real Dad and Mum were divorced when I was three. Dad disappeared while holidaying in the Northern Territory with some work friends around 7 years ago. His life ambition was to ride around Australia on his Ducati. I hoped that one day I would be able to fullfil his ambition seeing as he never got to. I'd start at home then make my way through NSW towards QLD and then through NT and to WA and finally SA and back to VIC.

My dream came true!!!

I finally get to finish dad's dream. Mum checked my bank account, I have enough money for Alex and I!! And we already have bikes. I have my Dad's Ducati and Alex has his Dad's....Harley....His dad NEVER and I say NEVER lets him touch his Harley but this is a special occasion..He'll understand.

He didn't understand.

We begged and pleaded for about an hour but still nothing. So we finally gave up and thought it would be easier to hire a bike than steal his.

We hired an old Yamaha for Alex and headed off one dark Sunday morning, (yeah dark, Alex thinks it will be best if we leave before the sunrise..grr) with Mum and Steve's best wishes and promises to ring at least every two days.

Where we live isn't that far away from the NSW border, so all we had to do was go about 15kms to get onto the Newell Highway and that would take us through NSW.

Great! We're about 50kms into the trip and Alex needs to go to the dunny. So we stop at Jerilderie and again at Grong Grong and once more at West Wyalong and Forbes, but the stop at Forbes was for the night, we both were really stuffed and had enough for one day.

While I was out getting pizza, so we didn't starve Alex was sitting in the pub having drinking competitions with bikie gangs, not so smart on his part but you can't tell him anything when he's pissed.

The next day we made plans to get on the Mitchell Highway and go through Trundle to Bourke and up to Queensland but about 320kms later we only just made it to Nyngan so we thought we'd stay there.

That morning had one of the best sunrises I think I have ever seen.

We were so sore from the day before, I was surprised that we even got on the bikes let alone ride.

Its about 1:30, lunch time! We're now at Bourke and are so happy that there is only 259kms to go until we get to Cunnamulla, our next stop. Still , we weren't too happy to hear that we had that far to go. So now I'm eating, and it kind of looks like Alex is too, but no-one can ever be sure of what he's doing most of the time.

Bourke is way different to Cobram, I mean that in a good way..kinda, well Cobram is like a city and Bourke is the 'Outback' or so they call it.

We did arrive at Cunnamulla its dirty, barron and really isolated.

Next morning we got up, had breakfast and both of us knew that we weren't looking forward to today at all! We had a total of 1035kms until Rockhampton and some how if we can find the most minuscule piece of energy to make it all that way, we know that we would be hero's...well in our minds at least.

Alex thinks that we are going the long way around which is total bull. Whichever gave him the map needs to go to a psychiatrist.. I think it was Steve.

As we're driving through Mitchell I suggest we stop cause I mean its pretty cool that a town has the same name as you!..But no Alex wants to keep going.

564kms on and we get to Theodore he thinks it sounds cool so... "Oh lets stop here!" Grr I dont know how much more I can take of him!!!

Anyway, we made it without any punch-ups, thank god. It was about 4:30 we were at Rockhampton. We figured that as Yeppoon was only about another 43kms, there was no point in wasting more money on another pub stay, so we just kept going.

Again, we made it without a scratch and out of nowhere Alex randomly yelled out "Lets go to the pub for a drink we've earned it" Well I had been putting up with him! So we went. As usual I was over it in about 5 minutes.

You just can't stay mad at him he's like the nicest person on earth and doesn't even realise it.. I guess I have now.

Sitting on that balcony looking out at the golden sand and pristine blue water of the ocean made me think about my life, like a job and marrige, yeah I'm only 18 but it's something you have to think about and if I would always be friends with Alex (I'm sure every guy thinks about these things at some time in their life...do they?).

At that very same moment, I heard an extremely low voice yell out to us, we turned around and looked, he was standing near our bikes. As we walked over he said to us

"I haven't seen you blokes around here before. These your bikes?"

"Yeah" I said trying to sound more manly.

"So wat are you doing?"

"Nothing" said Alex I laughed and just thought to myself 'idiot!'

He gave Alex a weird look and a smirk appeared upon his face. He was probably thinking the same thing I was.

"We're riding around Australia, I'm Jake by the way and this is Alex"

"I'm Garry, look fella's you guys are alright and I'm lookin' for a couple of blokes to work for me harvesting sugar cane"

"And you want us?" asked Alex bashfully.

"Yeah" he said "You guys are 18 aren't you?"

"Yeah" We said suprisingly quickly at the same time "We'll have to think about it mate, is that ok?" I luckily got those few words in before Alex said anything else riduculously stupid.

He said that was fine and turned around, as he was about to walk back into the pub he handed us a white card with his number on it, and said "Give us a call when you make your mind up" with that he turned and walked away.

We found a pub to stay at and talk this over. Alex thought it was a great but there was still one problem...Our families.

I rang mum.

She cried. She said that they were happy tears but I didn;t believe her. I told her that I would be back in about 6 weeks. She then eventually said it was ok and I could say yes. She then told me she loved me....and I cried (which is totally normal).

Alex rang his mum. She didn't cry. She said it was good that he was growing up. Which is good for him. He hung up and then laughed at me cause apparantly I was being a girl.

Next we rang Garry. He was stoked that we would be helping out, a little too excited even. He said we could start as soon as possible, which for us was tomorrow!

The next morning we sent the bikes back on the first train (no point in paying the hire fee on Alex's, seeing as we wouldn't be using it) Steve and Alex's dad, Harry would pick them up from Yarrawonga.

The work with Garry was hard, the time working for him helped us both grow into men. I sort of know what I want out of life now, Alex has no We ended up staying in Yappon for 8 weeks. Mum gave me so much grief and I really wanted to see Nikki, Alex thought he wanted to see Sammy, so we headed home for a well earnt rest.

We will continue our journey, but seriously who knows what the next adventure with my mate Alex will be, or where it will take us.

A Cowboys Day

2009-06-25T13:48:53Z

The morning stillness and the rays of sunlight breaking over the mountain, sets in motion another day at the ranch. It was just breaking dawn when I went to the barn to grab my saddle for the day's work ahead. It is spring according to the calendar, but the fresh blanket of snow would cause one to question that and argue that spring should be a time when meadows are covered with flowers and green grass and not a new dusting of snow and ice. A day such as this where I grew up in central Texas, would be one for the record books, but out here it is not unusual to have snow on the ground and another month of winter.

The boys had already saddled and were waiting on me when I reached the corral. "Deter" was leaned against the fence pinching a new bite of tobacco while "LJ" was collecting his rope and building perfect coils before he tied it to his saddle. Now old "Deter", well he has been ranching and cowboying all his life. A quick glance at his hands reveals a look of leather that only time, hard work and the weather can produce. His wrinkled face is filled with lines that I am certain each hold a story that most men only dream of living. His chaps show all the signs of belonging to a working man and not some weekend cowboy. His boots are worn, but soft from the leather oil he cleans them with each night. His stories will keep you mesmerized as he revisits the many adventures he has experienced over the years, and paints a picture in your mind as clear as the heavens on a star filled night. "LJ" is young, energetic, and full of spit and vinegar, but he soaks in every word that old man says, just like a sinner hears the preacher on the front row in church.

We are moving the bulls from the winter pasture to the cows today and chances are we will need the ropes and the dogs to get them there. "Bode" and "Jake" were already anticipating the adventure and they can barely sit still while we get ready. "Bode" is the youngest and fastest of the two dogs. He will become the most valuable if any of the bulls break from the herd in the gather, while "Jake" is the most experienced. They work together good and make a strong team. Kinda like "Deter and LJ".

We down the last of the coffee and load the horses into the trailer for the drive out to the pasture. The dogs are already loaded and we climb up into the truck and head out. It is a beautiful morning, cool and calm winds. The fresh snow is just a light covering and will probably all melt off by noon. I drive slowly, not because of the road, but just to take in the beauty Old Mother Nature has provided this day.

"Bode" and "Jake" are out of the truck and anxiously awaiting a command to gather the herd. "Deter" is already moving to the east side of the pasture as "LJ" and I move out away from the truck. "Bode" stays with me and "Jake" moves on out with ‘LJ". We only have 15 bulls in this pasture, but moving them out will be like getting an old Grizzly to leave her cubs. I expect several fights and flying hair. Several of the older bulls will be pretty cooperative, but the young ones will challenge the horses and put up a Hell of a fight. I gave Bode some bacon and a little egg this morning figuring that he will need all his energy. Besides, he eats my cooking without even one little complaint.

Deter has positioned himself on a ridge overlooking the valley and has let us know that a few bulls are moving in toward the water tank. I sent LJ and Jake a little farther up the draw and I am moving off with Bode to secure the west side of the pasture. Here is where patience is the best action. Just sit back and let them all come in before moving down on the herd. I relaxed on my horse and had Bode lie down beside me. A shadow came into view and I looked up to see an eagle soaring towards its nest. What an amazing view he must have of this country. As serene as it looks from my view, for him it must look like an ocean of grass dotted with trees. He circled for a few moments, and then disappeared over a ridge line. There is an abundance of ground squirrels scurrying to their holes and peacefulness in this little valley that is nearly overwhelming. I never grow tired of just sitting and looking at all that surrounds me.

A ringing from my cell phone brings me back. Deter has let me know that all the bulls are through the draw and we can move down when I am ready. I called LJ and we slowly started in toward the herd. If we can get two or three of the bulls moving out toward the gate, we should be able to get the rest to follow without too much trouble. LJ has sent Jake on up ahead and is whistling him to circle to the right. Bode keeps looking up at me as if to say, "When do I go"? We rode another hundred yards and I sent Bode out. He quickly reached the rear of the cattle and I motioned him to move left. He responded quickly and effectively. The bulls started moving. Deter was already set up east of the gate and LJ was drifting back to the rear. I remained on the west side of the herd and we started pushing the bulls out.

Just as I was thinking about how easily this was going, two bulls in the middle of the bunch started pushing and shoving each other. Its breeding season and the bulls feel it. These cattle act no differently than any animal in the wild. Only the strong and the most aggressive will get to breed most of the cows. The fighting instinct is strong and these bulls go at it vigorously. The problem for me is that their sparring match has caused the others to drift out of the tight group we had moving out of the pasture. I sent Bode in to disrupt the fight and Deter and I tightened up the group. We were yelling and slapping leather and Jake was grabbing any bull wanting to leave the group. It took a few minutes, but we managed to get them moving our way once again. It took a couple of hours to reach the gate and the open pasture of cows, but all in all it went really well. LJ closed the gate and we watched as the bulls set off building their little herds. Each bull would push his group off and although he will lose one or two to another bull, I am certain the best bulls will do the most breeding this year.

We rode at an easy stride back to the truck and Deter was off on another story that had LJ's full attention. Shoot, it had mine too. I loved hearing Deter's stories. You had to make up your own mind on how much was true and how much was coloring for the story. But as he talked along, you quickly realized, it really didn't matter. His stories were interesting and exciting. He was completely animated as he told the story. You could feel each and every word as though it had a life. His head would rock back, his eyes would light the moment, and his hands would flail through the air as he spoke. I'm surprised he didn't fall off his horse..I glanced down as we rode along and I swear I think Jake and Bode were listening.

We reached the barn and LJ and Deter began rubbing down the horses and I put the saddles away. It had been a productive day and we were all tired and hungry. Bode and Jake have been in and out of the water trough ever since we got back and are off chasing squirrels. I am looking forward to a cool beer, some food and a good night's sleep.

May!

2009-06-24T11:05:25Z

As she layed in the hospital bed, a ball of sadness and fear clogged my throat. She looked so helpless, so sad and sick. i wanted to do something to help, but there really wasnt anything i could do except wait, to sit by her side and hope. May was a fighter and i believed she would make it through this. She had just been diagnosed with cancer, the doctors were still working on how far it had spread through her body and wheather its removable. This isnt the way an 11 year old should die. My poor daughter, i wish there was something i could do to help more. She looked so peaceful when she slept, her honey-brown hair, framing that beautiful face and those hazel eyes. She was an amazing young girl.

"Um, excuse me Mr. Stephen" i turned around to find a doctor standing behind me. He wore blue rimmed glasses and held a grey clipboard with a bundle of paper stuck to it. "Yes doctor" i replied with a croaky voice. My throat was dry from not having enough water. "Do you have a minute?" something in the doctor's voice didnt sound so convincing, but i followed him out into the hallway and closed the door to May's room. "Yes" i said impaciently. "Ah, yes, well we have found the cancer" he started to say until i interupted him. "well thats good isnt it? you can treat it now cant you?" The doctor stood there looking at me through his glasses with worry. "um, im sorry to say that its not all good news i have" he fumbled throught a few of the paperwork and continued to speak. "we believe the cancer has spread from her back to her brain. Im sorry, there isnt anything else more we can do" The shock from this terrible news rang loudly in my ears. i wasnt sure what to do, wheather to cry, scream, run or die. My poor little girl was dieing and there wasnt anything i could do. Falling to my knees, i felt as if the devil himself had just ripped my soul and all my happiness and hope from my body. Everything around me spun like i was on a merry-go-round that kept spinning faster and faster.

My stomach felt sick and my head felt as if i had been hit my a train. I tried to stand but fell straight back to the ground again. "are you ok sir?" The doctor helped me to my feet and i looked at him with fearful eyes. "you think im ok? after the news you just gave me about my daughter? she is going to die! my little baby girl is going to die! and your asking me if im ok?!" i yelled at him with anger. I was so sad, so angry, i just wanted to die myself. I managed to hobble over to May's door with the doctor's help. "do you need anything sir?" he asked helping me into a chair placed beside May's bed. "i just need to be alone right now" i looked over at May on her bed. She was such a beautiful young girl, it was so hard to believe that something so bad could happen to her so quickly. It just didnt seem fair. A click noise broke my train of thoughts and then i had noticed the doctor had left the room. Now alone with May i looked back around to her pale face. Gently i grabbed her hand and tried to think of how i was going to tell her the bad news. The ball of sadness and fear struck my throat again, and water started to gather in my eyes. It was going to be hard, and i knew she was going to cry, but she had to know. I layed my head on her soft, delecate hand and cried. It seemed like i cried for hours until i finally fell into a deep but disturbed sleep.

The end

A Simple Life

2009-06-20T16:39:51Z

The wind was blowing hard and cutting through my clothes like a knife through butter. It was late December and Old Man winter was here, this day. The day had barely begun and I was already wishing it was over. Most people associate California with beaches, sunshine, wine and surfboards, but they have never spent a winter in the mountains of the San Joaquin. I tried thinking of warm beaches, but it hasn't helped, it is still cold.

We are moving the cattle from the high country today. They will need to forage in the lower valleys to make it through the winter. We had only been out for about an hour and already we are having difficulty getting the older cows to stay with the herd. These old mamas are wild and salty. Just when you think you have them controlled, they bust from the group and drag about 10 or 20 with them. It makes you feel like a yoyo on a string. You throw it out; bring it in and out it goes again. I remember my grandfather talking about the old days. Back when a dollar was worth a dollar and a cowboy worth his salt could have probably already had this herd to the bottom. Cowboys in those days didn't worry about the stock market or the price of fuel. Interest rate and the housing market was not a topic of conversation at breakfast. They talked about horses and cows and having enough feed for the winter. They talked about the weather and how old Deters horse had throwed him plum across the pond. They laughed and they smiled at how lucky they were to be living this life. You couldn't be a cowboy if you really cared about how much money you had in the bank.

Today we bank on line, send out emails and talk on cell phones for hours on end. We plot and strategize our business and hope the banker don't quit, get fired or die. I often wonder what it will be like when my grandkids are old enough to have a ranch, a herd of cattle, or even if there will be land available for ranching. These and other thoughts run through my head as we slowly move the cattle along. The wind has lain somewhat and it has made the chore much easier to bear. At least I can feel my fingers and toes again. I had about decided they had fallen off.

Dave has moved to the rear and taken off to bring back a set of pairs that broke away from the herd. The rest of us continue on down the mountain with the remaining cows. Just then that old one horned bitch broke away in a run. I thought we were going to make it all the way in with her, but she was off and at least 10 went with her. JJ broke his bay horse into a run and was closing in on her with a big loop built and enough open space to make the catch. I watched as he threw the loop and couldn't help but laugh a little when she ducked away at the last minute causing the loop to catch nothing but air. We left JJ to deal with the old cow and continued down with the remainder of the herd.

As we moved on down the canyon I can only imagine how we would have looked to any city folk with our drooping hats and bedraggled appearance. Our old clothes probably wouldn't have brought four dollars at a rummage sale, but our saddles were top notch, our lariats were new and our horses were freshly shod and dancing through the rocks like ballerinas on a stage. Any real cowboy takes pride in his tack and his gear. JJ probably only has a few pair of jeans that aren't torn, tattered, or covered in blood. Some his, some from brandings, some from a Saturday night brawl at the local tavern. Dave most likely washes his only nice shirt each Saturday, so he can look good for church on Sunday. Every young boy grows up wanting to be a cowboy, but few ever do. There is no real money in being a cowboy. It pays only enough to live a simple life. No fancy houses, no fancy cars, usually a second hand truck that someone else broke in. The work is hard every day. You get up before dawn; you eat breakfast while putting on your boots. You are a victim of the weather. It is hot in the summer, cold in the winter and the in-between, well it is usually wet or humid, but on rare occasion, it can be just plain perfect. There is nothing more beautiful than a sunrise on a summer day as it lights the sky and reveals a whisper of clouds, or a sunset slowly swallowing the sky as it sinks into darkness, but not before first lighting the stars to guide us home. You work till the work is done, or until dark. What you don't finish today, you pick up on the next day. You fight snakes, coyotes, drought, floods, and broken fences and provide care for your animals. Happiness comes from your work and a since of accomplishment. Your richness in life and your inspiration is Nature. I was born to be a cowboy. I will always be. For one to truly appreciate this life, he would have to live it.