Slice of Wonderbread

feeling hot hot hot... and not in a good way...

2011-03-30T19:19:00.002-04:00

Sickness. I hate sickness. O has been sick for a couple of days now, and I'm sick too. O being sick means two things... She wakes up all the time at night and she doesn't eat. Those things together means I'm up at all hours during the night and my boobs leak milk all the time. It sucks.

Recap

2011-03-21T18:30:00.002-04:00

Back again, typing on the iPad with O sleeping in my arms. I'm hoping W won't notice me doing this and demand to have the iPad to play games.

So O was born one rainy November Friday, my contractions started in the morning and I started timing them at 10 am. At 11 I woke J up and let him know I was having regular contractions and that we wold probably have to go to the hospital soon. He had a shower and I called the hospital to ask about when to go in. My contractions were about 5 minutes apart. They told me to come in right away since it was my second baby. We took a taxi to the airport, leaving my mom behind to pick W up from daycare and care for him until we got back. At the hospital we found out my doctor Dr Brown was the attending doctor. He checked me and I was 4 cm open and he decided that was enough for me to stay. I got a room and we made ourselves comfortable. My contractions were not very painful and they were coming in a bit sporadically. After about 3,5 hours a resident came in and broke my water, I was 5 cm open and 80% effaced. The contractions were still not very painful but once my water was broken they started coming in hard and fast, they got very painful very fast and after about an hour I had resorted to crying in a fetal position and wanted the epidural so bad. The nurse ordered if for me and while we were waiting for the anaesthesiologist I told them I had to go number two. That raised a red flag with the nurse and she decided I had to be checked because that was probably my baby I was feeling. She forced me down on my back and had a look and discovered that she could already see O's head. No time for the epidural the anaesthesiologist was sent away when he showed up and a frantic search for Dr Brown started. Our room was flooded by residents, interns, nurses and Dr Brown. And after pushing for about two minutes she was out.
She was born on November fifth at five, twenty-seven pm. 50 cm and 3940g ( 20 inches and 8,11 lbs) and she was (is) perfect. The nurses were astonished over her pinkness , she didn't have a sign of jaundice and she was happy and sweet from the get go. We stayed at the hospital for 24 hours before going home to a sick W.
My mom and my M-I-L came up with W an hour after she was born to see her and W brought a book for her (The Mommy Book) and O had a gift for him (Jet Ray Lego).

Once home we had a sick W and a tiny baby but with some help from my mom we managed fine. W is a lovely big brother and even though he's not that interested in babies he wants to keep her and he watches over her and makes sure she's alright and he tries to make her laugh.

That's all I have tine for now, I have to go read a bed time story to W and sing him a song.

More later.

4,5 months later

2011-03-21T16:58:00.002-04:00

Last I wrote here was in September when I was sick and pregnant. Then I don't know what happened. I lost interest in writing.

So to recap. O is here, she came out on Guy Fawkes day, remember remember the fifth of November. 5 days late and I swear I spent those five days doing star jumps and drinking raspberry leaf tea. When she did come she came out fast though. Too fast for the epidural, but more on that later.

She's now 4,5 months and lovely.

Now I have to feed the bigger monster and myself before the baths... I'll try to remember to post again later today.

Sick and confused.

2010-09-09T14:06:00.002-04:00

It sucks being sick when you're pregnant. For many reasons.
1 you're already pregnant and feel like a huge, waddling something with back pain and swift kicks in the ribs.
2 you're not allowed any medicine that actually helps.
3 you couldn't sleep before and now it's absolutely impossible to get any...
4 your three year old keeps insisting on you playing with him even though you can't stand up without fainting.
and so on.

On top of all this I am confused. I just booked W's first dentist appointment on a day we can't go and I'm too sick and tired to call and change it.

sucks all around.

32 weeks

2010-09-05T14:38:00.003-04:00

so this whole thing about posting weekly to give my unborn child some kind of a resemblance of a pregnancy journal is a complete fail!
I have not at all felt like blogging, it's been too warm and I've been too tired and too busy. But I thought I'd post some photos this week so you'll see what I look like when I'm huge and tired. =)

Week 27

2010-07-26T13:30:00.002-04:00

We're back.
Sweden was lovely but warm and busy. I managed to get my morning sickness back which I did not appreciate and my child now speaks Swedish. We had a great trip.
Since coming back I've dealt with horrid jet lag and humid weather. These past two days have been amazing though warm but not too warm and beautiful.
The belly is growing and baby is moving around a lot. Going to the doctor next week for a check up and a glucose test so I'll have a better idea of what's going on then. Been having some cramps on one side of the belly that I'm a bit worried about but apart from that it's all good. I'm 26 weeks and 1 day today which means it's time to start looking for a dress for weddings. I have two coming up in 9 and 10 weeks.
Now I shall go enjoy the quiet time while W sleeps.

3

2010-06-19T07:40:00.000-04:00

In the morning he woke us up early as usual but this time I didn't try to make him go back to sleep. I made a small breakfast plate for him and got his wrapped gifts. I lit the candle on the little cupcake that he brought home from daycare the day before. We sang to him and watched him as he excitedly opened his gifts and marvelled at finally getting the things he'd talked about for weeks.

Outside it was still drizzling slightly which was not good for our plans to go to the zoo. We hung around at home for a couple of hours having breakfast and watching Curious George before making our minds up to go to the zoo anyways rain or shine.
At the zoo the sky was blue and the sun shining. He was so excited shouting "We're going to the zoo yaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeeyyyy," the whole way there. We saw rhinos, elephants, hippos, zebras, tigers, lions and lots of other animals,

We ate ice-cream and went on rides and at the end of the day we cooled of at the pool in the water park. We had a fantastic day.

I can't believe my boy is three already and that this was his last birthday as an only child. Next summer at the zoo we'll have his little sister (probably) with us and we'll be a family of four.

Finally pictures

2010-06-14T14:23:00.005-04:00

I have finally managed to get some photos up here! These were all taken yesterday when we went downtown to get my iPad and stopped by the new fountain at Place des Arts to play.

Halfway done

2010-06-13T22:14:00.002-04:00

Today I'm halfway done, I'm 20 weeks pregnant!
I'm also the proud owner of an iPad!
It's crazy to think that I've done half the work and in 4,5 months I'll see my new baby.

week 20??

2010-06-09T14:30:00.003-04:00

So I believe I'm still 19 weeks pregnant... 19+3 I think... but I get confused.
It's very different being pregnant the second time around, I just don't have time for all the thinking about what the baby looks like now and what she's growing this week. Maybe with school out of the way I will find time for that again, but it just doesn't feel as important to know day by day what's happening. It's probably because I've been through it before and in all honesty it's not much I can do (except for eating right and stuff) that will change anything.
This week I've gone into full on planning mode. I'm planning W's birthday and his party and I'm planning the packing. We finally got our tickets to visit Sweden and we're leaving in less than 2 weeks and we'll be gone for three weeks. I bought a new suitcase for W today because the bags we have are too big and with the weight restrictions on the plane it's pointless bringing a huge bag that's only half full. With this new bag we have two good sized bags. I also picked up his birthday present from my grandparents. I won't tell you what it is but it will come in handy for the traveling.
Tomorrow it's W's three year check up at the paediatrician so we'll see how he's growing and developing. That's always interesting.
I honestly have nothing more to say.

Go Sweden, Go go Go Sweden!

2010-06-06T13:42:00.002-04:00

Today is Sweden day! So happy Sweden day everyone!
Today is also the birthday of a very special little girl. My friend J had her baby girl at 6.26 this morning. She has no name yet and she's only 3 kg but she does have a proud big brother F. Congratulations to the whole family on their 2 week early addition!
So that leaves me, the only pregnant person around. Everyone else who was pregnant already had their baby and I... well I have 21 weeks to go.
So I'm 19 weeks along, which means I'm almost at the halfway mark. Which is exciting but also a bit depressing, 21 more weeks before the baby is here... that's a long time.

Last week was a nightmare. I had two exams and W got sick on Monday night and stayed sick most of the week. I was exhausted and felt like I had no brains left by the time I got to my second exam on Friday night. I did a real poor job of that one too so I'll most likely have to redo that one in a couple of weeks.

Hopefully with school being over my life will quiet down a little, these next two weeks are still busy though cause I'm working a bit this week and next week it's W's birthday and that requires some planning. But after that maybe. Or maybe I'll make it to Sweden after all. My family really wants us to come so they want to pay for our tickets so now I'll just have to make that work. It'll be good to go and hang out with my mom for a few weeks though and meet up with friends and family and finally get to see M and J's new baby boy L.

As far as the pregnancy is going all is well. The babe is kicking a lot and that's always reassuring and the belly is getting rounder so soon I won't look like I'm just fat, I'll actually look pregnant. I can't wait. I took some pictures of the belly but they're still on my camera so I'll upload them tomorrow when I have some time.
Well that's it for now.

feeling hot hot hot

2010-05-27T15:25:00.002-04:00

this week has been busy busy and it's not slowing down. I have exams next week so I'm in full study mode.
This week the temperature climbed above 32°C and the humidex was unbearable. We installed our a/c:s and had picnics on the bed just to cool down a little.

The belly is growing the baby is moving and I'm feeling better.

More when I have more time.

first brush with death.

2010-05-19T13:12:00.002-04:00

W has just discovered death.
The other day we were walking back home from daycare and we found a dead bird on the sidewalk. W wanted to pick it up but I told him no (eww bacteria) and said the bird was dead. The words were out before I had even time to think about what I was saying and I regretted it immediately. "What's dead mommy?" asked W.
Wow tricky, how will I get out of this one without traumatizing the wee one for life.
"Hmm honey, it's.... "
W interrupted me and continued
"Is it sleeping?"
Sleeping is good,
"Yes honey it's sleeping, it'll be sleeping for a long time" (regretting that one straight away to I don't want him to be afraid of sleeping)
"Is it going to fly away, mommy?"
"No darling, it won't fly anymore"
"Why not? What's going to happen to it?"
"Well, it probably had an accident and flew in to something so it won't fly anymore and now it's dead and someone (not us) will come and bury it"
"What's bury it, mommy?"
"It's when you put something or someone in the ground. But it won't be stuck underground forever it'll go somewhere else where other birds are" Boy am I rambling at this point.
"OK mommy"

And that was it, he then talked a bit more about the dead bird that was sleeping on the sidewalk and he wanted to go back and see it the next day. Luckily it was gone.

How do you talk to an almost three year old about death without scaring them?

the maybe?

2010-05-18T15:26:00.006-04:00

I think it's finally happened... the nausea is going away. Unfortunately it's been replaced by daily headaches but you know... you can't win them all!
Anyways. I had a doctors appointment yesterday at 9.30 am. I showed up early since I was late the last time I was there and since I had decided to walk there. The walk was much quicker than anticipated mostly because I found a nice back entrance through the woods on the side of Mount Royal. So early I was. I went and sorted out my hospital card since I had gotten a new medical insurance card since my last visit and then I went upstairs... or is it downstairs... that building is confusing. The entrance is on the fourth floor and my doctor on the second so downstairs it is.
I checked in at the reception weighed myself and left them a nice pee sample then I settled down in one of their uncomfortable chairs to read some school work. It was 9 am.
At around 10.30 I got to go in to see the nurse and answer all the regular questions and so on. I then went back to the waiting area to wait for the doctor. At noonish I had finished my school work and was getting seriously stressed out because I had promised I'd pick up W from daycare at 1 pm. I called J who gave me an earful about how important it was for him to be early for work and how useless I was being waiting for the doctor to see me. I hung up on him and turned the phone off. I then spent some time fantasising about drop kicking that stupid woman hogging my doctors precious time. At 12.25 I called J back and told him I would try to reschedule my appointment, he told me not to since I had already spent all day waiting around. I hung up on him again because I was finally being called in to see the doctor.
Once in the office I calmed down a bit and after answering some questions and talking about my headaches I was told to get on the bed so he could do a quick scan... A scan again I got to see my baby again so soon!
I was very excited and told my doc how much I want to know if it's a boy or a girl. He asked me what I thought it was. I lied and told him it's probably a boy (I secretly thought it was a girl but I didn't want to let myself hope). He laughed and said I didn't sound too excited about that. I told him the truth that since I already have a boy it would be a lot of fun with a little girl and besides since I'm only having two kids if I have a boy this time I will never have a little girl.
He laughed some more and told me that he does not think it's a boy. He thinks it's a girl. He then showed me the three white spots that are connected by a thin white line that are supposedly tell tale signs that the babe is in fact a girl.
It's probably a GIRL!

Now J takes this news as "alright it might be a girl but I'm not convinced" whereas I am more in the "oh my gosh it's a girl it's a girl"
We'll find out with a little more certainty in 5 weeks at our second scheduled ultrasound with the ultrasound technician but until then I will be browsing the girl section at the baby store!
To keep you guys from getting too bored with my ramblings I have also posted a couple of photos.

The hospital where new baby will be born

Rainbow around the sun

Just sittin' in a tree

The first ice-cream of the season!

Oh and another thing. Since Friday last week we are now a pacifier free house! It's been better than anticipated and W has been a real champ.

Mother's Day

2010-05-08T19:37:00.003-04:00

Tomorrow is mother's day. My last mother's day as a mother of one. My little prins has given me two gifts so far, one he made at daycare and one he and his daddy made today. The one he made at daycare is a bag of lavender with a flower and a painted hand print, it's beautiful. The one he made today is a box called "All the reasons I love mom" and it's full of little notes explaining why he loves me. It makes my eyes tear up to read it. Granted I am crazy hormonal these days so it might just be that.
Little baby in the belly is still making me sick sick sick and I'm seriously hoping that will stop soon. I am fully in my second trimester as of tomorrow and things should really be getting better.
In other news my plans for a trip to Sweden this summer are currently on hold since I cannot get a more specific date for my citizenship ceremony (if they do allow me to become a Canadian citizen) than "probably in a couple of months". If I miss the ceremony that would be very bad so I just can't plan anything until I know and that might not be until the week before the ceremony. Sometimes bureaucracy sucks!
Been thinking of posting some photos soon as well but I've been so tired that I just can't be asked but one of these days I promise I'll try to get some pics up of W and of the belly. My aim is to do weekly shots of my belly as it starts to grow properly. Another day.

week 15

2010-05-06T13:29:00.002-04:00

this week has been a little bit of a set back when it comes to the feeling better part. I've been nauseous and sick for most of it. On the upside though I am eating better these days and I think that this weeks barfing combined with the somewhat better diet has made my weight gain slow down or stop or maybe even reduce a little.
The belly is starting to show a little and I now look like I'm a bit chubby and not at all preggers.
What else can I tell you... hmm I've started my quest of getting W to give up his pacifier before his birthday in a month. So far not so good. We've talked about how big kids don't need pacifiers and we've talked about the pacifier fairy who's going to bring him a gift when he's ready to give up the pacifier but every time I ask him if he's ready yet he tells me in his southern American accent (that I have no idea where he picked up) that: "Not tonight, Mama"

Week 14

2010-04-28T15:21:00.002-04:00

Alright a little more time to update.

So to give you some further information. I am currently in my 14th week of pregnancy. Which means that I have gone 13 weeks and some days. The baby is due on October 31 so Halloween baby! I hope it will wear a nice costume coming out.
So far I have experienced all the pleasures of early pregnancy such as extreme nausea, constant vomiting, stuffy nose, nosebleeds, gaining weight, growing in the belly area and it appears my bladder has shrunk. I have also had a urinary tract infection and done a bout of antibiotics. I am tired and hormonal and I cry about the most insignificant things.
I have also grown two bra sizes which J seems to see as a positive thing.

We are currently throwing names back and forth but we seem to have somewhat settled on a girls name. No boys name yet though, so if you guys know of any good boys names then please let me know. We need serious inspiration.

W has taken the news of the baby with varying degree of excitement. At first he cried and told me he doesn't want the baby in mommy's belly. Now he has come to terms with it and he occasionally kisses the belly. He doesn't seem to know if it's a boy or a girl either. He tells me it's a sister one minute and a brother the next. He seems pretty set on the boys name though, Lightning McQueen. I'm not sure about it.

Yes another thing I want to ask you is if any one of you have some advice for properly preparing older child for new baby. I would like it if he didn't hate the baby and if he felt involved and proud to be a big brother. All advice are welcome.

Thanks

The time has come

2010-04-27T17:30:00.002-04:00

After 8 odd weeks of puking my guts out, being unable to sleep and gaining weight even though I can't keep a meal down I am finally out of my first trimester, or as I call it: why-did-I-ever-agree-to-this-mester.
Yes people mark your calendars cause we're adding another member to the world.
Baby 2 is due to arrive in late October or early November and we have seen him/her for the first time. We had the first scan last week. Too early to tell if it's a little boy or a little girl though.

I will from now on try to update frequently with all my pregnancy updates but right now I have to feed the older child.

I know

2010-04-17T15:03:00.002-04:00

I know I'm a terrible blogger... the kind that never actually writes anything. Well I have my reasons. First I was way too depressed to write anything, then I was working on fixing my life and being less depressed. When I was finished with that something huge happened that I just couldn't write about. And since I couldn't write about it but it was/is such a huge part of my life it felt wrong writing at all and not talk about it.
Regardless I will try to do better and maybe find a way to tell you what's going on. Just give me another couple of days or weeks and I promise I'll be back with more.

Till then
L

the look

2010-02-15T12:29:00.003-05:00

http://caroline.feber.se

Here is the link to the awesome website my hubby frequents every day. Right now they're holding a competition where you can choose one of the looks on their editorial and if you're eloquent enough you can win it.

Since I am in dire need of new clothes and have no set plans about going to Sweden before the end of August I need to win this!

The look is fantastic, it's a stripy dress with a gray hoodie and the coolest leather jacket I've seen in a long time. The look is completed by a pair of peep-toe heels.
This is my style and I would look great in it... so I need to win!

Please please please snälla snälla snälla

the look

slow postings...

2009-11-30T15:02:00.002-05:00

this fall has been somewhat difficult for me. I had a run in with a depression. And I also found myself totally and utterly absorbed by the Twilight-fever. I have finished reading the books for the second time and I had promised myself I would sit down and try to put into words what I would like to say about this fall once that was done. But now when I'm here all I really want to do is to pick up book one and start right over again. Now this is not a good idea since I have already neglected my school work enough and I should really focus on my work situation.
I am still not ready to put down in words what's going on so I guess if anyone is still reading this you will have to be patient a little while longer.

the anniversary post

2009-11-22T10:26:00.001-05:00

Today it's 5 years since we said our vows in that chapel in Las Vegas.

fell apart

2009-11-03T21:54:00.003-05:00

I fell apart this weekend.
Came apart at the seems and just cried.
I'm slowly putting myself together again.
Thanks to the beautiful people in my life.

I realize that this is not the real video but I could not embed the original so you guys can go check it out here

coma

2009-11-01T08:57:00.001-05:00

I'm finally snapping out of my Twilight coma that I've been in for the last week and a bit. I'll post more once I'm fully detached!

music

2009-10-18T13:51:00.002-04:00

today I'm listening to this...

I hope you all enjoy it.

I guess I have Vampire Diaries to thank for wanting to listen to this but that's ok. It's my guilty pleasure to watch Ian Somerhalder shirtless dancing to a cover of this.