For most of last week, I was weighing whether to fly home to Ohio for the holidays. Christmas with my family is extremely important to me. It has always been a time to celebrate, reconnect after time apart, enjoy our annual traditions, and really soak in that familial love. My fondest, richest memories of growing up are from our holidays together.

With COVID on the rise in both California and Ohio, I ultimately decided and felt that I could not, in good conscience, fly home for the holidays. I don’t feel comfortable with being in the airport, being on a plane, having a layover in Atlanta, quarantining separately from my parents in Ohio, finding rapid tests in Cincinnati, and so forth. The idea of contracting COVID and spreading it to anyone else is just unbearable. Even though I feel I’ve made the right decision for myself and my family, it has not made it easy.

What’s been adding to my not-so-great feeling is that early on in the pandemic, I thought, “Well if I hunker down now and take the right precautions, then by Christmas I’ll be able to see my family.” It was a thought, a hope, that got me through many dark times in the past year. I don’t feel silly for having that thought and I don’t think it was for nothing. I am grateful that the thought of being able to see my family brought me hope and comfort when I needed it, and it still does, even if I have to wait a little longer.

Ultimately, I feel like one of the lucky ones. I am beyond grateful my family has their health. At a time when millions of Americans are affected by this horrible disease and are grieving hundreds of thousands of losses, our health and the health of those we love cannot be taken for granted. I personally am extending my love and respect to those I don’t even know by staying home and foregoing my usual holiday.

So now, I am turning my focus onto what I can do at home. I’ve never spent the holidays without my family or in my own home. I now get to dream up traditions that I want to start on my own and explore how Zach and I will make this time special for us. The fact I get to do that is an extreme privilege.

There was no best feeling of last week, and sometimes, that’s OK. We’re all doing our best, and that is enough.

Sending everyone so much love.

xx
Kailey

I usually don’t measure these ingredients and instead go off consistency, but here is a good baseline (I DID measure for recipe purposes!).

Five-Ingredient Cookies

Ingredients

• 2 bananas, mashed

• Splash non-dairy milk of choice

• 1 T or small pour of agave or maple syrup

• 1 ½ C quick cook oats

• Chocolate chips to your desired level of chocolate craving

How To

• Preheat oven to 350* F and line baking sheet with parchment paper.

• Mash bananas with a fork. Add a splash of milk until it forms a liquid batter consistency. Add maple syrup and stir.

• Add quick oats until it creates a thick dough batter, about 1 ½ cups. Add in chocolate chips.

• Scoop onto parchment paper and bake at 350* for 15 minutes.

• Let cool and enjoy!

Ciao for now,
Kailey

Original recipe inspo is from Stef Muir on Instagram.

A part of why I didn’t feel the guilt that can be associated with a second of not being “productive” is because everywhere I looked on social media, it seemed that everyone was doing the same thing I was doing. Which brings me to a question: Why is it that in the US, particularly, we only all collectively allow ourselves to rest on very specific dates (and only a few dates a year)?

I firmly believe that we all need to rest more. There has always been a big difference between a two-day weekend and a three-day weekend, for example. A two-day weekend feels too short for many reasons, but I believe a lot of it is because we still use that time to be productive, whether that means socially or running errands, or completing home tasks. A three-day weekend, though? It finally allows for a day of…well, what do I do? How do I use this time? It removes a certain pressure to get. things. done. And a FOUR-day weekend? Forget it!

What I felt myself slip into was a deeper level of complete detachment from both outside pressures and pressures I put on myself. I slept better, I felt lighter, I felt…really good. And I didn’t feel like I was missing out on anything. (Los Angeles is back in extreme lockdown again anyway, but that’s another topic for another time.) I don’t know if others were feeling something similar, but please share if you were.

I suppose this is a message that keeps coming back to me this year: give yourself permission to rest. Double down on it. TRIPLE down on it. Anytime that feeling starts to nudge its head (when your workouts start feeling blah, your concentration starts to wane, your overall energy levels aren’t where they normally are), maybe take it as a sign not to do more to compensate, but to do less. Allow yourself to rest.

As I’ve mentioned before, those moments often act as a springboard. For example, I now feel completely ready to go this week, full steam ahead.

I hope you all had a relaxing last week, and hope you have a beautiful week ahead! Much love!

xx
Kailey

It really felt like one of those big full-circle moments. Everything started with SnackFace in 2009. That’s when all of this was set into motion. I’ve always loved snacks and connecting with people via food, their relationships with food, and most importantly, their relationships with themselves. To now have a curated section on Abbot Kinney under the brand name with which I connect with people one-on-one after a decade-long journey to get here…I have to say I feel really proud. It feels like the culmination of so many things and the beginning of something so big all at the same time. That is the best feeling of the week.

I have so many ideas and things I want to do with Best Feeling Forever, and I’m always thinking, “What more can I do?” But for this week and this moment, I just want to stand still and acknowledge it fully. I am so grateful. Grateful for the opportunity, grateful for collaboration, grateful for every single person who’s ever let me into their lives, grateful for my health, grateful for my family, grateful for my bffs.

As we head into the holiday week ahead, I know it may look different for so many of you this year. Perhaps you don’t get to see your family and friends as you normally would. Or perhaps you are and there is some fear or discomfort around it. Whatever your approach this year, be kind to yourself, give yourself the space and breathing room you need (literally and figuratively!), and take the holiday at your own pace. Whatever you need, listen to it and respect that voice.

I am so grateful for each and every person who still visits SnackFace, for every person who subscribes to the bff newsletter, for every single interaction with someone who makes me feel less alone digitally. I am grateful for YOU, my bffs.

Hope you have a beautiful week full of love, grace, and kindness.

xx
Kailey

However, I’ve felt very reflective upon the last year in particular. I’ve been thinking about where I was last November versus this November. In November 2019, Best Feeling Forever didn’t exist yet. I was about three months into IIN this time last year and loving it, eager to take on clients already. I was also still working as the market buyer for my friends at Hi-Lo Liquor and loved that, too. Zach and I had just moved back into our house after a very long slog in our renovation process and we still had no furniture.

The start of 32 was a total transitional phase for me. I was a student again, I finally was in my home after a year of being in and out of it, I was in a job I knew wasn't a forever thing but was grateful to have, and I didn’t have any practices or routines in place like I have grown to know truly help me. There were so many balls up in the air, and I learned how to be agile and flexible, but I felt unsettled.

As November turned to December, January, and February, my intentions became clearer but that unsettled feeling was still there. Then March came. The pandemic. Lockdown. Quarantine. A lot of fear, stress, and worry came with this time. My journals will always carry everything I felt at that time.

But something positive that came from being very isolated for several months was a sense of routine and practices that served me. I got into the practice of journaling daily, for example, which was something I did as a kid. I read spiritual books that I haven’t looked into for years. I sought and found a deeper sense of peace within me than I’d ever known was there. I connected with friends honestly and in meaningful ways. I got to know 10 incredible women through coaching them. The idea of Best Feeling Forever came to me. Zach and I, always grossly close, are even grossly CLOSER now.

Because of all this, I feel settled now. I feel settled in who I am. I have a strong voice and I’m no longer afraid to use it. I feel confident being just me because I feel like I’m IN my body, mind, and spirit. There are certain layers of self-consciousness, self-doubt, and fear that are cleared now because I feel so settled within me.

The best feeling of the week is going into my 33rd year feeling this way. Settled in who I am, confident being just me, truly being IN my body, mind, and spirit. It’s a gift and a privilege, and I’m grateful.

Wishing you all a beautiful week ahead. Much love.

xx
Kailey

Something that never, ever gets old to me is anything that involves bacon/turkey bacon, lettuce, tomatoes, and avocado. I even hesitate posting this “recipe” because it is so, well, basic, but it’s very representative of what I promote: eat what you like and make it easy for yourself.

I’m not big on keeping track of macros personally, but it’s a nice reminder to think of your meals as having a carb, a protein, a fat, and some fiber, and build from there. Think: what can I add to make this more fulfilling? Never: what can I take away or avoid? It will help leave you feeling satisfied.

Thus, simple wraps, sandwiches, grain-based bowls, and salads have taken the main stage for lunches and dinners. This wrap is a favorite take on a BLT.

BLAT Wrap

Ingredients

• whole wheat tortilla (you could also turn this into a bowl with rice or quinoa or a sandwich with bread)

• schmear of Kite Hill Everything Cream Cheese (I used this instead of mayo)

• 1/3 avocado, mashed with salt & pepper

• 2-3 slices turkey bacon, prepared

• sliced tomatoes, seasoned with salt, pepper, and lemon pepper (I had cherry tomatoes on hand)

• 2-3 romaine leaves

How To

• prepare the turkey bacon according to the package (I baked mine at 375* for 15 minutes, flipped, and baked for 5 more)

• prep vegetables

• once bacon is ready, layer your wrap in order of the ingredients listed: wrap, Kite Hill Everything cream cheese, smashed avocado, turkey bacon slices, tomato, romaine leaves)

• wrap and eat!

I hope this acts as a reminder that making a meal for yourself doesn’t have to be complicated! Happy snacking!

xx
Kailey

Something that has come up a lot is a similar conversation I’ve had with dozens of women. The feeling is this: I can’t handle feeling the same way I did the day after the last election again. I will use my own experience as an example.

I was extremely hopeful heading into the last election until around October. I went home to Ohio, outside my SoCal bubble, and realized the election looked very different outside of California. When I voted, I was brimming with excitement, though. And then when the results came, I was crushed. I even had a job interview the day after the election and cried during it. (Needless to say, I did not get that job.) Then, I walked into the office I worked in at the time and entered into total silence. A usually buzzing entertainment news office had gone quiet. All women were at their desks, heads down, working silently. Many, many women I know, am friends with, have worked with, etc. felt the same way I did.

I don’t want to harp on this negative feeling, though it’s important to recognize. My feeling this time four years ago was not unique. And I know a lot of people are feeling anxious and nervous about this week. You are not alone. You are human for having feelings.

I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow or this week, but I want to share a few things I’m personally doing to help minimize my anxiety and stress. I believe this is helpful no matter how you’re voting.

1. VOTE. I voted a few weeks ago and I felt something lift off me once I voted. I felt that I had contributed and it gave me a sliver of peace of mind.

2. Stay off Twitter. For me, this is big. I love Twitter. I rely on it for mostly celebrity news and things that will make me laugh, but none of that is going to exist this week. At least not on a scale to offset the rest of Twitter.

3. Focus on what’s right in front of me. I’m focusing on my family, my husband, myself, my friends, my home, my business, my health. That’s my personal reality and focusing on those things helps me feel less overwhelmed.

4. Lean into art and entertainment. Today and tomorrow morning, I’ll be doing my now-favorite morning ritual of an hour-long walk while listening to a fiction novel. (This week, it’s One True Loves by Taylor Jenkins Reid, one of my favorite authors.) I also plan on having Housewives on all afternoon tomorrow, to be quite honest.

5. Stay physically active. Moving my body outside has helped my anxiety immensely. I’ve also relied on gentler movement like Pilates to help stretch and move my body in a way that doesn’t spike cortisol levels.

These are just a few things I’ve personally found helpful, and I hope if you’re feeling like you need help, these offer you a bit of respite as well.

I’m sending you all love! Have a wonderful week, bffs!

xx
Kailey

As I’ve shared before, I started going to Corrective Skincare in Santa Monica in May of 2019. From May to February of 2020, I went to Corrective Skincare every other week for a light chemical peel to continue to exfoliate my skin and clear my pores without having to do extractions (I have the worst reaction to extractions!). My routine came to a very obvious halt when the pandemic hit.

It’s now been eight months since I’ve had a facial or seen my favorite esthetician, but I have to confess: my skin is better than ever.

I partly believe this is so because my hormones have balanced themselves out. I also think it’s largely because, in quarantine, I haven’t been afraid to add in new products to continue improving my skin. I have landed on a routine that my extremely sensitive, somewhat oily, acne-prone skin absolutely loves.

It’s not just the products, either. It’s the whole routine. There is ONE morning routine that’s always the same. The evening routines, however, are on a rotation. I do my best to break it all down below!

Morning Routine

Every morning, it goes like this:

1. Murad Refreshing Cleanser massaged into skin for one minute

2. Indie Lee CoQ-10 Toner on cotton pad, gently swiped over face

3. Peach & Lily Glass Skin Refining Serum, patted into the skin

4. Peach & Lily Matcha Pudding Antioxidant Cream, pea-sized amount gently massaged into the skin

5. Elta MD UV Clear Broad-Spectrum SPF 46 all over face, ears, and neck

6. Colorescience Total Eye 3-in-1 Renewal Therapy SPF 35 in medium under eyes

Previously, I had only been washing and applying SPF. This was imperative as I was trying to clear out acne, but what I started to need was more moisture. I’ve also incorporated products with niacinamide, which has helped calm down my acne and any redness drastically. ALSO, the Elta MD and Colorescience SPF products are both holy grail items for me now.

Nighttime Routine A

This is where the routine gets a little confusing. There are TWO different routines and they alternate nights. On top of that, there is a nighttime routine C that I do once a week or once every other week, which I’ll also explain. But first, nighttime routine A:

1. Banila Co Clean It Zero Cleansing Balm to remove makeup/as first cleanse

2. Murad Refreshing Cleanser as double cleanse

3. Ice cube run over face for 30-45 seconds

4. Indie Lee CoQ-10 Toner

5. Corrective Skincare 5% Benzoyl Peroxide lotion applied all over face

6. Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream under eyes

7. Peach & Lily Matcha Pudding Antioxidant cream (this is only optional and occasionally used…very lightly if so)

The double cleanse has been a complete game-changer for my skin. I was using micellar water as my first cleanse before, but this balm works even better for me. The ice cube is still an essential part of my routine, as it kills bacteria and reduced redness and swelling. The benzoyl peroxide helps clear and prevent acne, and if I feel like I need moisture after, I do the Matcha Pudding very, very lightly.

Nighttime Routine B

Nighttime routine B is exactly like nighttime routine A, but step five is replaced with pHresh Face Correction Pads.

1. Banila Co Clean It Zero Cleansing Balm to remove makeup/as first cleanse

2. Murad Refreshing Cleanser as double cleanse

3. Ice cube run over face for 30-45 seconds

4. Indie Lee CoQ-10 Toner

5. Corrective Skincare pHresh Face Correction Pads swiped lightly over face, from forehead down

6. Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream under eyes

The pHresh pads have 2% salicylic acid and 10% glycolic acid and help fade discoloration, reduce appearance of fine lines, and overall promote cell turnover. I do not moisturize after using the pads so as to help the chemical exfoliation process. (The thought is: why trap dead skin you’re trying to exfoliate off under a thick layer of moisturizer?)

Nighttime Routine C

Nighttime routine C is used only once a week or once every other week, and is cushioned by an evening of no actives the evening before using and the evening after using. This is helpful for my sensitive skin!

1. Banila Co Clean It Zero Cleansing Balm to remove makeup/as first cleanse

2. Murad Refreshing Cleanser as double cleanse

3. Ice cube run over face for 30-45 seconds

4. Indie Lee CoQ-10 Toner

5. Corrective Skincare 10% Glycolic Acid, shaken, poured onto cotton pad, gently swiped over face from forehead to chin

6. Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream under eyes

I put nothing on top of my skin after the glycolic acid. Again, it’s to help that skin exfoliate. I notice the biggest difference two to three days after using this. My skin GLOWS and redness is nowhere to be found. It’s also been a huge help in keeping the pores on my chin unclogged.

Overall Routine

As you can see, it’s very intentional and very specific. On a sample week, the routine goes:

Monday: morning routine, nighttime routine A
Tuesday: morning routine, nighttime routine B
Wednesday: morning routine, nighttime routine A
Thursday: morning routine, nighttime routine B
Friday: morning routine, nighttime routine A
Saturday: morning routine, nighttime routine no benzoyl, no pHresh pads, just moisturizer
Sunday: morning routine, nighttime routine C
Monday: morning routine, nighttime routine no benzoyl, no pHresh pads, just moisturizer
Tuesday: morning routine, nighttime routine A
Wednesday: morning routine, nighttime routine B

And so on, into perpetuity, until I need to find something else that works for me!

I cannot express how happy and relieved I am to have a routine that works, so I just had to share the details! I also want to share that I have done nothing dietary to help my skin. I still eat gluten, dairy, and sugar, and in fact, have probably been eating more of it than I have in years past!

What skin-care favorites have you discovered lately? I’d love to know!

xx
Kailey

As I’ve shared, I took a Coaching Intensive Practicum over the last six weeks that will allow me to apply to sit for the National Board of Health & Wellness Coaching board exam in February. Last Thursday was the final class of the six-week course.

I love being a student. It’s where I feel most at home. I love the structure of classes, a syllabus, quizzes, exams, modules, and I love the learning itself. The course provided a sense of comfort as summer turned to fall. It created focus in a chaotic time.

During our twice-weekly calls, I was able to hear the stories of nearly 30 women from all walks of life, age, and backgrounds. As much as I learned about the coaching structure and ethics from the class, I learned even more about the strength of women from simply listening to these women open up about their lives. I am in awe of their strength, their vulnerability, and their drive to help even more people.

So it came as no surprise to me when I started to tear up at the end of our final call on Thursday. I don’t get to have this structure anymore, and I don’t get to have the network of the 30 women on the other end of the teleclass. Moreover, the ending of the class signifies the closing of a chapter.

The ending of this class means I’m on my own now. It’s up to me how I study for the board exam. The structure is no longer there for me. It also means I no longer technically have to take any further classes through IIN to further my education as a coach (although I’m sure there are additional classes I’ll want to take just for me).

With every ending comes a beginning, too. I’m entering a new personal chapter. Just as the class came to a close, Scorpio season started. Yes, my season. I’m nearing my 33rd birthday in November. Every birthday feels like a personal new year for me. It feels more like a new year than New Year’s. It’s my season to really dive inward and assess what I want to carry with me into my new year or leave behind. What serves me? What no longer serves me?

Not to mention the election… I really can’t get into that right now.

The best feeling of the week was definitely completing the class. It feels empowering to finish something you started. I left the class feeling like a more confident, more empowered, more knowledgeable, more professional coach, and I’m thrilled to be able to bring this elevated coaching to my clients. I’m excited to see what this new chapter has in store for me.

Hope you all had a great last week and have an even better one ahead.

Sending you love!

xx
Kailey

I found myself overwhelmed by pure, unadulterated joy while sitting on a balcony with Zach last Thursday. We were in Newport for a project of his and decided to stay another day simply to enjoy a day outside of our home. It was a luxury, indeed.

The day unfolded peacefully and rather normally. We woke up, got coffee, went for a walk, and tended to our calls and work. In the afternoon, we headed to the pool to relax, read, snack, swim. In the evening, we went to Nobu for an early dinner.

(I want to add here that we took precautions and felt safe throughout our stay in Newport. Our hotel was at 25% capacity and masks were enforced. Our room was sealed and sanitized when we arrived, and we did not have anyone else enter the room while we were there. We kept to ourselves most of the day and intentionally ate dinner early to avoid any crowds.)

Dinner was lovely and we actually had a brainstorming breakthrough for an upcoming project I’m working on. I couldn’t for the life of me come up with a name for it, and it finally hit me during dinner. I don’t think it’s a coincidence it came when it did, either. I think when we resist and force things to happen, they won’t happen. When we are in flow and trust that things will come when they should, they come surprisingly easily. Easier said than done, I know!

When we got back to the hotel, we called my co-creator of the project and all had a moment of celebration for landing on the name. Afterward, Zach ordered chocolate chip cookies and decaf coffee to the room.

We sat outside on the balcony eating our cookies, drinking coffee, chatting and laughing. The feeling of pure joy hit me. I just felt overwhelmingly grateful for the mini getaway, for Zach, for our families, for our friends, for creative projects, for the feeling alone. I am a complete mush, so naturally, I started tearing up.

Even just typing it, it sounds so small even though it felt so big in the moment. It’s like, “yeah, Kailey, you were sitting eating cookies, nbd.” But there’s no gain in downplaying any moment that brings you pure joy. The moments of joy can feel few and far between, but focusing on the joy when you feel it can create even more of it. Good feelings create more good feelings.

When we returned home the next day, Zach and I both felt energized and invigorated from our 36-hour getaway. I’m ready to carry that energy into this week.

I’d love to hear: What little moments brought you joy in the past week?

Wishing you all a beautiful week ahead!

xx
Kailey

Last year, as I checked in with my own ratings with where I fell with my primary food, there were two categories that always came up short: home environment and home cooking. I always laughed off my incredibly low rating of each because the situation was entirely out of my hands. From August 2019 through early November 2019, Zach and I were living between friends’ homes and Airbnbs while all the windows and stucco were being replaced on our house. The most consistent aspect of my “home environment” at the time was my suitcase, and home cooking? Nonexistent.

This past week, as I toasted up breakfast and had my selection of seasonal Trader Joe’s toppings in the fridge, I paused to consider why pumpkin butter and maple butter were bringing me so much joy. Similarly, I paused after making myself salad for lunch with ingredients I had in the fridge. Throughout the week, as I made meals from my fully stocked, fully functional kitchen, I couldn’t help but think about how grateful I am to have this luxury again.

I’m not sure why it hit me so hard this past week of all weeks, but the amount of joy cooking at home brought me was certainly my best feeling of the week.

A week of preparing simple meals here and there culminated in one of the best things I’ve made from scratch in a very, very long time: Baked Potato Soup. On Friday, after a fulfilling week of work and creating, I settled into the kitchen with a glass of Pinot Noir in hand and chopped, boiled, simmered, blended my way to this finished product.

It took two hours from chopping to clean up time, but it was satisfying to the very core to prepare something completely from scratch to enjoy with Zach. THAT was really the best feeling.

I hope you all have wonderful, delicious weeks ahead and that you take some time to prepare something you love from scratch.

Sending you love and healing energy!

xx
Kailey

P.S. Starting next week, Best Feeling of the Week posts will be exclusive to subscribers of the Best Feeling Forever newsletter. If you want in, please email me or comment with your email address!

P.P.S. I used this recipe for the soup. It says it serves 6 people but it made only two servings for us. I would double everything!

Iced Pumpkin Spice Oat Milk Latte

¼ C pumpkin puree
1 T maple syrup
½ tsp cinnamon
1 tsp pumpkin spice
¾ C oat milk (I used Malk)
2 shots espresso (I used Nespresso)
ice
coconut whipped cream

How to:

In a Pyrex measuring cup, add pumpkin puree, maple syrup, cinnamon, pumpkin spice, and oat milk. Stir until combined. Add to frother and set to cold stir setting.

Meanwhile, prepare your coffee and pour it in a glass over ice.

When milk is done frothing, pour over coffee. Top with whipped coconut cream and another sprinkle of pumpkin spice. Enjoy, bffs! 

Ciao for now,
Kailey

I am a firm believer that art and entertainment can help us heal and help us feel better, overall. For me, I feel happiest when I have a great book I’m reading or listening to, a TV show with fresh episodes to look forward to at the end of the day, and always, always, always good music to sing to and give me energy.

Here are some picks from last week that made life a little more fun and, well, entertaining:

Emily in Paris

Darren Star’s latest project, Emily in Paris, debuted on Netflix on October 2. By midday October 3, I finished all 10 episodes. The show centers around Emily, a good midwestern gal plucked out of her Chicago marketing agency and placed in their sister agency in none other than Paris. Throughout the 10 episodes, we watch Emily navigate not understanding or speaking French, living above a super hot neighbor, dealing with a boss who hates her, finding new friendships, and building both her personal and professional social media profiles.

Let’s just get this out of the way: much of the show is unrealistic and the character of Emily isn’t that dynamic. HOWEVER, it’s fun. It’s a fun distraction, it’s fun fashion, it’s fun to see Paris (Zach and I were supposed to be there for several weeks this year, but that’s neither here nor there), it’s fun to see Emily flirt with French men, it’s fun to see her work wins.

As I said to my mom, Emily in Paris is not going to change your life, but it’s an easy, breezy, light distraction. Also, PARIS.

PEN15, Seasons 1 and 2

I was significantly behind on the PEN15 trend, but now that I’ve watched two seasons within one week, I am a STAN. The show follows Anna and Maya, two 33-year-old women IRL, who play the 7th-grade versions of themselves. What is absolutely MIND BLOWING to me is the accuracy of the year 2000 7th grade experience they depict. They literally follow the timeline of my life.

From exploring their bodies to having crushes, feeling like an outsider, creating AIM screen names, first kisses, first periods, and beyond, the heart of the show is Anna and Maya’s friendship. They have their ups and downs, but they are there for each other no matter what.

It’s beautiful to witness their friendship. It made me nostalgic for the bffs I grew up with and all the painful outfits (low-rise jeans….!), group video projects, unreturned crushes, choreographed friendship dances, and sleepover pranks. It also made me long for that feeling: that even though everything feels awkward right now (bodies, relationships, school), the future will solve it all and make it all better. Watch IMMEDIATELY.

The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

OK, I actually haven’t finished The Marriage Plot yet, but I am a little over halfway through and fully wrapped up in the characters’ worlds. It’s all 80s yuppie academia, love, that time right after college graduation where you don’t know wtf you’re going to do AND you’re in the middle of a recession (been there!), and some travel. And more that I don’t even know yet!

The bigger plug, though, is for the Libby app. I am listening to this as an audiobook to work on my listening skills and to multitask while I clean and go on long walks, and I cannot recommend the Libby app enough! All you need to do is download the app, input your local library information (whichever library you have a card for!), and you have thousands of books AND audiobooks at your fingertips FOR FREE. YES, I AM YELLING. I cannot get over this! The magic of the library blows my mind STILL.

Music

Even though it’s still 80 degrees here in Los Angeles, I’m pretending it’s fall when I’m inside the house. I’m lighting pumpkin bourbon candles, throwing on cozy sweatshirts, and yes, of course, consuming pumpkin spice. My music choices also tend to reflect the season. Summer 2020 was the summer of Gaga. I could not stop listening to Chromatica (tbh, I’ll never stop). In the last week, though, I found myself gravitating toward Taylor Swift’s Folklore, which I kind of abandoned after the week it was released. It’s the most fall album ever. Give me a good Pinot Noir (my fall wine preference) and some Folklore, and I’m staring out the window envisioning myself in a movie about heartbreak (even though I am very happily married).

Fall is also always Ella Fitzgerald season. I’ve loved Ella since I was in 10th grade and borrowed Ella CDs from the library and burned copies at home (see library obsession above; also, sorry for breaking the law). One of the most thrilling music releases of late has been Ella: The Lost Berlin Tapes (Live). In this rare, recently unearthed 1962 recording, you can hear how much pleasure singing and music brings Ella— you can hear it in her voice, in her delivery. The effect is infectious.

I hope you can find some comfort, joy, and entertainment in these picks. I’d love to know your thoughts and what you’re enjoying lately!

xx
Kailey

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m currently in the midst of my IIN Coaching Intensive Practicum. A requirement to pass the course and become qualified to sit for the NBHWC exam is to do a live coaching demo in front of all your peers (my class has 30 people in it). My turn to coach live was last Thursday.

My nerves started to say, “hey, notice me,” the night before, but I got a good night of sleep and felt well rested the day of my demo.

I spent the morning leading up to the demo journaling and practicing switching my imposter-like thoughts to positive self-talk. Since I graduated IIN, I’ve clocked more than 100 hours of coaching with various clients. I’ve always studied and taken great notes. I walked myself through the facts of the matter. I looked through my coaching logs. I thought of the wonderful women who have let me into their lives. I flipped “I don’t know what I’m doing; do I know anything?” to “I have everything I need within me.”

As it always seems to do before something new-to-me, though, the nervousness returned, crept into my body, and stayed there from a half-hour before class at 10:30am right until my time for the demo, 11:15am.

Mentally, I was set. But nerves are a different ballgame. As I listened to the demos before me, my palms grew sweaty and my heart started pounding. I actually checked my heart rate on my watch and it was 103 versus my usual 60-70 bpm resting heart rate.

Then, it was my turn. I started the demo with some breathwork— both for the client and for myself. I asked the client a few questions and did my absolute best to listen to everything she shared with me. The nerves melted away about five minutes in. I was wrapped up in what the client was struggling with and doing my best to lead her to a solution. Before I knew it, my 15 minutes was up and the demo was over.

I was relieved to hear great feedback from our instructor and from fellow students. And I was massively relieved, and dare I say proud, that I did the damn thing. I did the thing that was scaring me. Why did it scare me so much? I coach all the time. Perhaps it was because it was in front of my peers. Maybe it was because I couldn’t prepare beforehand and had no information on who the client was (you’re assigned your client live).

Or maybe it’s because as an adult, I can choose not to do things that intimidate me. I can hide if I want. Life isn’t like high school or college, where you’re forced to make presentations and give speeches and perform solos for a passing grade. If something is uncomfortable or in the least bit intimidating, I can say, “no thanks, I’d rather not,” and shut down and opt-out.

But the sense of sheer pride and relief and joy I felt after doing the scary thing? THAT is the feeling. It’s the best. It makes you feel like you can do anything. That is worth the build-up and the nerves. Actually, maybe nervousness is really just excitement dressed up in a different outfit. Nervousness shows us how alive and in the moment we actually are.

As I head into this new week, I want to harness that powerful energy of knowing I can do scary things, and maybe they’re not so scary after all.

I hope you all have a beautiful week ahead. I’m sending you love and courage.

xx
Kailey

How do we learn to be comfortable with the uncomfortable and avoid falling into black-and-white thinking? If there’s anything 2020 has perhaps been trying to teach us, it’s just that. This entire year has been gray. We are neither back to full-fledged “normal” nor are we in the first stages of pandemic lockdown. Our collective consciousness is not where it was six or seven months ago, but justice has not been served. The election is just ahead and we do not yet know what the outcome will be, but damn, do we feel the pressure and anxiety of it.

On a broad level, living in the gray has taught us to have tough conversations, to sit with challenging feelings, to dig deeper, to learn more.

And what about personally? What does this mean in the lens of one’s relationship with herself, her health, her body, her mental health?

I’ll speak from my sole experience here. When things feel really gray, really unclear, really out of my hands, I tend to lean into false control to steady myself. I lean on regiments, crafting new goals, putting myself on a new schedule, committing to a new workout routine. But as I mentioned a few weeks ago, that simply wasn’t working for me anymore. My false sense of control was just that—false. The very idea of it was false and anything it was temporarily supplying me was false, too. An illusion.

What I’m trying to remind myself is that no two days are ever the same. What happens today will not necessarily happen tomorrow. The feeling that overwhelms me today may not overwhelm me tomorrow. But today, this is what this day is about. Then, I move into, well, this is what this hour is about. Maybe I won’t feel this way by noon. This feeling or this thought does not have to color the entire day. Perhaps it will shift, evolve, move on. What’s imperative is that I’m facing the feeling. I’m not running away from it. I’m not trying to cover it up with a new goal or a new task or a new whatever. The feeling is here. It’s here for a reason. What is it showing me?

I feel that in America especially, we fall into either/or, black-and-white thinking. You can EITHER be this thing OR this thing. You can either believe this or this. You are either defined by this one thing or this other thing. Are we forgetting that we’re all human, and as humans, we contain multitudes? There’s no one color for all the colors we contain within us. There are moments in life that are neither good nor bad…but why do we automatically associate gray with the negative?

There is something that happens daily that especially anyone by the beach widely observes and embraces. Every night, there are a few magical minutes as the sun makes its descent. It glows brighter, more orange, more vibrant than it has all day. The sky turns neither daytime blue nor nighttime black— it instead turns a gradient of pinks, oranges, yellows. As day becomes night, we stare in awe at the in-between moment. We love it. We admire it. We can’t believe we captured it. We see that in-between doesn’t always have to be gray. It can, in fact, be one of the most beautiful things we’ve seen all day.

Above is a picture of my Barney purple Mead notebook. It houses all my notes from nutrition school. It’s been with me since last August when I first started. The notebook traveled with me from Los Angeles to San Francisco to Eugene to Seattle to Vegas and finally back to Los Angeles as we toured one of Zach’s projects, Low Low. The notebook remained a constant as we then hopped around from friends’ homes to Airbnbs when our house was massively under construction. No matter where I was, I found comfort in having my notebook and studying. I still find that comfort and a bit of excitement when I open it up to a new page to take notes.

It’s interesting, now, to be a student again. Here I am sitting with my notebook a year since I first got it, but this time I’m coming at it as a certified health coach. I’ve had 100+ hours of coaching experience. I’ve had the extreme pleasure of working with the most wonderful women. And still, I am eager to learn more. To bring more to the table. To offer more to others.

This time around, I’m taking the Coaching Intensive Practicum via IIN, which is a six-week course where we have two live calls a week in addition to learning modules. I just found out when I’ll do my live coaching demo in front of my fellow classmates (October 1, the countdown is on!) and I’m excited to see how it goes. Taking this course will allow me to sit for the National Board of Health & Wellness Coaching in February or October of 2021. It’s a five-hour test that’s known to be very challenging, but it’s a big goal of mine to be able to approach it confidently.

There is something about being a student again in September that feels so right. It’s in rhythm with what I grew up knowing as the norm. You don’t have to sign up for classes or courses to stay a student, though. What’s most imperative to staying a student is staying curious. Staying open-minded. Having the willingness to say, “I don’t know that, but I’d like to. Please tell me more.”

As I settle further into creating time for my course, the calls, and the studying, I feel more and more like my truest self. My intention for this week is to maintain that student mindset and show up for both my practicum calls and client calls fully present and in the moment.

What is something you’ll do this week to stay a student?

Wishing you all a beautiful week ahead.

xx,
Kailey

As someone who’s gone to the gym at least three days a week since I was 17, the shift to at-home workouts has been easier than I thought it would be, but it’s also had many phases. First, it was really fun and I tried a variety of workouts on YouTube. Then, my amazing friend behind U BEAUTIFUL SOUL launched thrice-weekly live workouts on Zoom. I fell into that rhythm for months, alternating days of cardio with the UBS workouts. When that ended, I moved onto running more often. When that ended (as it always does for me and my shins), I turned to something I’ve never before considered: mat Pilates.

I have to admit…I never really “got” it. The few Pilates classes I’ve tried over the years felt lovely and elongating, but they didn’t get my heart pumping the way I’m accustomed to. But one week during lockdown, I woke up with my neck out of whack and my usual run, HIIT, or weight-based workout wasn’t going to cut it. I turned on a Tasha Franken 20-minute Pilates flow and breathed my way through it. The next day, I tried another flow of hers. Then the next day, yet another. Eight days later, I realized I’d been doing Pilates every single day.

The gentle movements worked tiny muscles I’d been overlooking. Because the flows weren’t overly taxing, it didn’t feel like I had to get myself amped up to do a workout. There was no intimidation. I could simply show up at the mat and follow along. I felt encouraged and excited. I also felt more centered and grounded.

I enjoyed the videos so much I invested in one-pound Bala bangles and three-pound weights to enhance the workouts. From March through August, the only equipment I had at home was my mat, booty bands, and a set of 10-lb weights. I dare you to try Tasha’s 7-minute arms with 10-lb weights (JK PLEASE DON’T)…it’s not possible. The ankle weights make any leg or booty-focused workout a more intense burn. I genuinely can’t believe I’ve underestimated the power of light weights and gentle movements for so long.

I’ve known it’s not true we need to sweat in order to get a great workout, but sometimes you get so used to something that it’s hard to break out of it. Something I’ve come to learn with age and experience is that no workout is superior to another, and what’s most important is variety within your workout routines.

Of all my at-home workout phases in quarantine, I’m happiest with the one I’ve settled into for now. It’s a messy, non-calculated, go-with-what-I-feel-that-day mix of Pilates, HIIT, classic weight training, running, walking, cardio barre, dance, and some days, nothing at all.

I’d love to know: What at-home workout phases have you been through and what have you found works best for you?

Ciao for now,
Kailey

Pictured:

Bala Bangles Classic 1-lb
$49

Bala Bars (3-lbs each)
$55

That said, I personally enjoy having protein powder as a part of my diet. I like adding it to smoothies to amp up the staying power and round out the nutritional profile. If there is one macronutrient I accidentally skimp on, it’s protein, so having protein powder as a supplement is helpful for me personally.

My protein powder journey has graduated from Vega to Garden of Life to Tone It Up to, finally, Sprout Living Epic Protein. I found Sprout Living via Shut the Kale Up’s smoothie IGTV and I don’t think I’ll ever turn back! I wanted to take plenty of time testing it out before reviewing, and after using this protein powder regularly for over two months, I can’t recommend it enough.

First of all, the ingredients are a dream. The base is a blend of yellow pea, sunflower seed, pumpkin seed, and cranberry seed. Each flavor features its own combination of superfoods like maca, lucuma, cacao, and ginger root, and the very last ingredient is stevia as the sweetener. Most ingredients are organic, vegan, non-GMO, gluten-free, and kosher.

Secondly, and perhaps most importantly, this is the best tasting protein powder I have ever tried. Ever. There is zero chalkiness, no twinge of being overly sweetened, no fake-tasting flavors. The vanilla lucuma blends beautifully and complements tropical-forward smoothies and the chocolate maca makes every smoothie delectable. If you’re going to buy only one flavor, opt for the chocolate maca! I love blending it with banana, peanut butter, cacao nibs, and unsweetened coconut milk for what genuinely tastes like a milkshake.

THE SNACKFACE STATS

FLAVOR: 5/5
I don’t even have to think twice when it comes to rating the flavor of these protein powders. They’re incredible. Highly recommend chocolate maca—it’s deep, rich, nuanced.

TEXTURE: 5/5
They blend like a dream, there’s no chalkiness whatsoever. I use one scoop at a time.

INGREDIENTS: 5/5
These are the best ingredients I’ve found in a protein powder so far. I have zero things I’d change about it.

WHERE TO BUY: You can shop their protein powders at sproutliving.com!

Happy snacking,
Kailey

-Wake up
-Make coffee
-Journal
-Meditate
-Read
-Work out
-Shower + get ready + breakfast
-Client calls and work
-Lunch somewhere in here
-Outdoor walks
-Dinner and TV at night

Quite frankly, I love this schedule. It really works for me…until it doesn’t. I recognize it doesn’t work when I start getting this stagnant energy in me. No new ideas are coming, the motivation to create is nowhere to be found, and I start to feel drained by the activities that usually fuel me.

Younger me would have doubled down harder on my routine. I would have gotten more strict, put more pressure on myself to work out harder, made my morning routine more elaborate, given myself more tasks. My recent approach, however, is to do the opposite. I try my best to just let go.

On a standard week, that letting go looks like not doing my morning routine and instead, enjoying coffee with Zach while we chat. It looks like not working out or finding an entirely new-to-me workout to try at home. It means buying foods I haven’t tried in a while.

Last week, however, was a very extravagant version of letting go. For months, my friends and I had our one big trip of the year planned for two of our friends’ birthdays (September 9 and September 11 babies, respectively). When I tell you we all talked about this every single day for months leading up to it, I’m not exaggerating.

The trip ended up being one of the best girls’ trips I’ve ever been on. In part, I think that’s because of the nature of the vacation (birthdays! Palm Springs! pool! friends! rose!). But another part of why I think it was so wonderful was because we all needed a big dose of joy. Being two hours away from home and in a house together allowed us all a chance to truly disconnect from the outside world and connect with one another. That connection feeds female friendships so deeply, and I don’t think there’s nearly enough conversation around evolving, changing, growing, flourishing friendships.

After a few days of pure fun, celebration, and getting outside my usual routine, I feel more inspired than ever to continue to explore my creativity, grow my coaching business, embrace the routines that I love, and nourish my relationships.

Also, as a reminder to you, you deserve to give yourself a slice of joy every single day. As Sophia Roe wrote in a recent Instagram post, “In a time where we are inundated with consistent trauma, sorrow, struggles, and stress finding time for JOY, while often seen as an act of resistance, is also categorically NON-NEGOTIABLE. There is no trauma Olympics, after which we are rewarded for who can tolerate traumatic experiences best. Our ancestors would be devastated if they knew that all we made time for, was sadness.” My intention for myself and for you this week is to find that slice of joy where you can.

Hope you all have a beautiful week ahead!

Ciao for now,
Kailey

Best Feeling of the Week is a part of a new series where I share the overall feeling of my last week and what my intention is for the following week. This is included in the weekly Best Feeling Forever newsletter.

It was a delight having someone else cut, file, scrub, and paint. I truly relished in it. The only downside was the nail polish I chose at the salon was chipping off in full pieces a mere two days later. As in, I’d look down and a whole toenail would be bare.

I KNOW, I KNOW, nails are not a big deal, but getting pampered always feels nice and after spending quite a bit of money, I would have loved for it to last. Within four days, I removed all the nail polish and took matters back into my own hands.

Olive & June kindly sent me their Nailfie Ready Box with their six new fall shades, and tbh, I was almost eager for the remainder of my salon manicure to fall off so I could try it out. Complete with nail polish remover, a clean-up brush, nail clippers, a nail file, a buffer cube, a top coat, cuticle serum, and their polish bottle handle, Poppy, it truly is a full at-home manicure setup in a box.

I followed the steps Olive & June includes in the box (and also made a Reel out of it!) and gave myself a gradient mani so I could try all the fall shades. I was impressed with how smoothly the polish went on and how shiny the finish was. The best part, though, is that my at-home manicure lasted for six whole days without a chip. Not one chip!

Now that I have a full at-home setup, I prefer doing my nails myself. I know I can fix them up myself if there is a chip, and after having practiced cleaning my cuticles, shaping my nails, and painting well…I kind of feel like a nail artist myself. (As a complete aside, I swear learning how to do brush lettering helped me become better at painting my nails.)

If you’re looking to start doing your own manicures and become confident in it, I couldn’t recommend the Olive & June Nailfie Ready Box enough!

THE DETAILS

What: Olive & June Nailfie Ready Box with fall shades JJ, LD, MG, JO, HGC, & WKF

Includes: Nail Polish Remover Pot to erase old polish and prep nails, Clean-Up Brush for easy touch-ups, flat-edge Nail Clipper, dual-grit Nail File, and Buffer Cube for shaping and smoothing, the cream Poppy universal polish bottle handle, 6 of our 7-free polishes, custom formulated Top Coat, and nourishing Cuticle Serum with cactus flower.

Price: $80

Where: oliveandjune.com