Soul Aperture

joy healer {bella grace blog hop}

2016-04-20T08:00:00.000-05:00

"cling to what is good"

romans 12:9

i need to make it clear

there are things in my life i have come to know

and

one of those many things...

there are mountains i may never be able to climb

there are mountains i may never forget...

yet

still

i stand

i climb

i crawl

wobbly legs

shaking knees

bad assed

and

willingly

if i told you how very important it is to trust ones self

would you believe me

trust me when i whisper this to you...

i have decided to be my own joy healer

my uplifting tribe to chant sweetly my ability

for me to stand tall

i'm showing up for my life

{again}

i'm showing up for my life

present

concious

"come away with me in the night

come away with me and I will write you a song"

nora jones

{trusting me}

what i've learned to be the ingredient that was missing for so long

{trusting myself}

the more trust a woman shows herself

then

the more a woman remains on a path of authenticity

it's a pinch of this

teaspoon of that

the smokey paprika whirling in that slurry that binds the gumbo

the pinch of sweet currry

a bit of vanilla in the frosting

that

makes you close your eyes and smile with each spoonful

a hair flip

a pat to the afro

lip gloss for no reason at all

trusting myself blazes a trail of feel good vibes

restores my strength

...brings my warrior to the surface

{what about trusting the process}

the dirty dishes

scraped knuckles

the i miss you

the dead roses

the rain

regrets

fears

the

ups

the

downs

{while your trusting me}

know this

i have broken my own joy enough times

that

i could rewrite the book on let-downs

"touch me with no hands, hold me with your eyes"

alina baraz

{still}

i continue to connect the roots of this old oak

in which

i tangel myself within the stories of others

as i walk this dirt road

recognizing

each magical piece

sometimes damn messy pieces along the way

coffee

glitter

art

fear

love

loss

beauty

ups

downs

storms

sun rising in my palms

joy

amazing joy

joy

that heals

joy

that mends

"you got my soul"

bryson tiller

xoxo

this post is part of bella grace magazines blog hop

winter peonies

2016-03-02T13:31:00.003-06:00

i felt like we were so close

to Spring

then

the snow arrived

once again

heavy tree limbs

slippery roads

though

the silence of snow does serve its purpose within me

the pretty i love so much

continues to go on inside

inside of restless me

inside of my girly corner

there was cake last month

a second year of college started

a new year

a new word

{begin}

yes

begin

the restart button to each time i stumble

dust myself off...

begin

there is lemon for my tea

so there might be cake again

and

books

always books

The Storied Life of A.J. Finkry...

sometimes a book comes along

yes it does

love

to you

thankful

2015-11-27T12:01:00.002-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving

oh hello there ~

2015-09-28T10:41:00.001-05:00

hello there

the summer came to an end

books were read

slow

the grill practically stayed lit

we lived on fruit

i continued to knit through the warm weather

journal

dreams

i assembled a cake

birthdays were clelebrated

some goals were met

some were not

life

i've been away from this space for a while

now

autumn has arrived

it's good to be back

i missed you

I kind of so love these words and oh how i missed you...

2015-04-30T17:39:00.003-05:00

Some periods of our growth are so confusing that we don’t even recognize that growth is happening. We may feel hostile or angry or weepy and hysterical, or we may feel depressed. It would never occur to us, unless we stumbled on a book or a person who explained to us, that we were in fact in the process of change, of actually becoming larger, spiritually, than we were before. Whenever we grow, we tend to feel it, as a young seed must feel the weight and inertia of the earth as it seeks to break out of its shell on its way to becoming a plant. Often the feeling is anything but pleasant. But what is most unpleasant is the not knowing what is happening. Those long periods when something inside ourselves seems to be waiting, holding its breath, unsure about what the next step should be, eventually become the periods we wait for, for it is in those periods that we realize that we are being prepared for the next phase of our life and that, in all probability, a new level of the personality is about to be revealed.

Alice Walker: Living by the Word.

i've missed you, my friends

the pace and all that jazz

2015-01-26T09:43:00.000-06:00

it's seems the holidays

came and went

we spent christmas in a hotel

on the road

baby girl was invited to curl

for the state

of Ohio

we were together as a family

that's what it's about

love

i have a article in the latest issue of bella grace magazine

{palms clasped}

thank you for the all the kind emails you continue to send

{kindness}

the pace is slower here at home

the pages of the calendar continue to turn

time doesn't wait

it just doesn't

passport applications are being filled out

life is twisitng and turning us

in the most beautiful and confusing ways

i trust it

i am a faithful woman

{god fearing}

i continue to trust and roll with the process

i've been writing again

i bought a new journal

with each whirl of my pen i feel

the walls i've built as of late

begin to crumble

{self love}

reading in 2014 wasn't great for me

i found books were a chore

i had to step back

2015 i will allow the words to find me

{let go and love and all that jazz}

Ps: i finally have a link to the right to subcribe to this tiny blog of mine.

bless

since i bought flowers

2014-12-22T09:41:00.002-06:00

it's been too long since i bought flowers

my kitchen seems happier with the buds

i know i am

{smile}

Christmas is almost here

it will be so different around here for us

{more on that later}

are you ready for the holidays

i so love this season

it never gets old

{it's that Christmas magic that i love so much}

`
ps: have you seen this post?
bella's whole curvy girl series is raw and beautiful.
`
`
`
are you reading any good books at the moment
?

winter

2014-12-12T22:40:00.001-06:00

it's been quiet in our household

final exams have kept the the college kids

{busy}

{nervouse}

{anxious}

before that there was thanksgiving

turkey cookies
+

love
+
balance

winter break is here

we are all together as a family again

all is well

christmas is on the way

i kinda love that

{a lot}

i've missed you

{how've you been}

{?}

`
winter
`
winter
gray skies
hushed snow filled streets
twinkly lights
winter opens my soul
winter cracks me open with gratefulness

`

trusting the process

2014-10-31T20:41:00.001-05:00

i'm knitting a blanket

i'm trusting the {creative} process

it just feels right

on a thursday

2014-10-23T19:47:00.003-05:00

the whole family was home

on a thursday

everything else in the world

kind of stopped

i am just fine with that

; )

xoxo

full swing

2014-10-16T15:25:00.000-05:00

`
as i type this
my son is raking leaves
autumn is in full swing in the midwest
the rain has been falling as well
so...
many books are being read
i died and went to heaven over this book
i am so glad i gave it a chance
station eleven is one of the best books i've ever read
{what are you reading?}
`
banana bread is on the menu
i'm roasting a chicken as well
{What are you cooking?}
`
i turned the heat on last week to warm the house
{sigh}
{already}
`
+
i met a deadline for a magazine article
{can't wait to share which one}
`
we dropped baby girl back at school
{after autumn break}
but
not before
we shopped for yarn
and
tights
and
more books
`
{life is good}
`
happy october
my friends
`
xoxo

autumn is here

2014-10-02T09:50:00.001-05:00

i loved we were liars

it's the kind of book that gets you back into reading

there is just some YA books i appreciate

this was one of them

part mystery

part omg did that just happened

this book is currently being devoured

from here

i think i can get used to having a secret book arrive on my doorstep monthly

ohlove

autumn is here...

i couldn't be more happy

wholly ordinary has become part of my mornings

it's really blowing my mind

hi amanda

it's raining today

and

that's just fine with me

soup is on

life is good

how have you been

l' heure bleue

2014-09-09T10:15:00.002-05:00

The French called this time of day “l’heure bleue.” To the English it was “the gloaming.”

The very word “gloaming” reverberates, echoes—the gloaming, the glimmer, the glitter, the glisten, the glamour—carrying in its consonants the images of houses shuttering, gardens darkening, grass-lined rivers slipping through the shadows.

During the blue nights you think the end of day will never come. As the blue nights draw to a close (and they will, and they do) you experience an actual chill, at the moment you first notice: the blue light is going, the days are already shortening, the summer is gone.

Joan Didion, Blue Nights

could it be?

2014-08-15T21:55:00.001-05:00

could it be so much time has passed

that peony season flew by

i have missed you

life is moving at rapid speed

both kids are headed to college

baby girl turned 18

where does the time

i've been going and going

and

yet

i am barely able to keep up

today there was

slow

projects finished

i swear the days are getting shorter

and

even with the warm days

i feel like autumn is on it's way

merging into summer

bringing cooler evenings

if this is true i will miss berry season

it's been berries on everything for me

and raw honey

along with thick yogurt

summer has been good to us

i haven't read much

but

tonight there is this book

and the opening is

well

beautiful

hello my friends

loveliest

2014-06-13T10:11:00.001-05:00

`
"you are the finest, loveliest, tenderest,
and most beautiful person i have ever known-
and even that
is an understatement."
F. Scott Fitzgerald

i purchased this card from a etsy seller
she prints quotes out on a old typewriter
i find that kind of beautiful
{it's a gift for my daughter for graduation}

`
im here...
shuffling along
xo

away

2014-05-07T20:54:00.000-05:00

it was good for our little family
to get away

to reconnect

to love

to laugh

and

for a moment

i let the reality set in
that some of us would be in different parts of the country soon
this feeling

flooded the inside of my every fiber

then slowly

i weaved my way back

to the moment

to the love

to being present

`
life is good
+
a new wtsb is up

something about it

2014-04-20T18:58:00.000-05:00

i was all over with this photo

{yikes}

i can see where my focus was going

where my intention was

and

well

something about this photo

i insist we must love what we do

wholly

i try to do that

...

i do hope you have had a lovely Easter day

He Has Risen

the fan is humming

yes

finally

the temperatures are there

the house is still

the muggy rain has arrived

i am loving the writing in the book the orchardist

{breathtaking}

thank you artifact uprising for featuring my work
i'm honored

i kind of love this day

{so much}

Spring

2014-04-10T14:02:00.001-05:00

that sweet tea towel is a gift from rebecca

she also made me a red one

i really don't know where i would be without her friendship

{especially these last few months}

i finished "the goldfinch" book

no
thumbs down
not the book for me

i won't say more

i respect the many readers who love this book

i bought the reading chair

brown

leather

roomy

it fits in our bedroom perfectly
{with a quilt draped over the arm of course}
`

now to find a new book to sink my teeth into

suggestions
?

how about the orchardist

`
wtsb
is back
!
love love being a part of that group
`
thank you for the kind words about our girl getting into university
we are all over the place
where to go
?
which to choose
?
a fun but stressful time the same
`
my work was chosen for the cover
here at our collective

that makes me proud
i'm kind of beaming
!
`
`

these plums are going to be roasted with a chicken

yummy

Spring is here with it's ups and downs

cold

warmer

windy

sun

rain

i will take it all

moving along

2014-03-24T14:09:00.001-05:00

goodness

i can't put the book down

it's so good

but

must

the book is a hefty one

where will i find the time to fall into these pages

{sigh}

just like that

last Sunday to be exact

{"You're In!"}

that's what the letter read

her first college acceptance letter

we burst into happy dances

all around the kitchen

tears

clapping

phone calls

i am so proud of our girl

{smh}

it's too soon

she will be moving away

i miss her already

my homeschooling days are coming to an end

a retirement of sorts

{sad face- happy face}

all the emotions

we ate this pretzel for breakfast on Sunday

we all voted it be a tradition on Sunday morning

like pancakes

french toast

swoon

i went looking for a reading chair

i think i found one

{leather}

{brown}

needs a good breaking in

and

a warm corner

next to a reading lamp...

i only left the store with these sweet place mats

another look at the chair tonight

{perhaps}

life is moving along at a rapid pace

palms clasped

God is good

these things

2014-03-10T21:28:00.003-05:00

sleeping better
reading the goldfinch
{oh you warned me, i can barely put it down}
eating popcorn for dinner
moving forward
`
making chocolate chip cookies
creating a to do list for spring
{that includes another color of peonies}
+
`
using my big camera
{while}
shooting my girls senior photos
`
writing a letter with a magenta colored pen
finding frankie magazine
choosing peace
{it's the small things...}
`
i'm hoping you are all well
x

dreams

2014-03-06T22:06:00.000-06:00

i haven't been able to sleep well at night

some sort of wonky neck and shoulder type of strain

it hurts like hell

i am gathering a few essentials for tonight

journals

ink

the movie

"singing in the rain"

a few books by my bedside

hopefully i won't need any of it

and

i will snore a coat off paint of the wall

lol

there's been so much inspiration online lately

so many recipes

stories of winter

+
lent
+

the hope of Springs arrival

although i don't watch the oscars
or much tv for that matter

i couldn't help falling in love with these words

"no matter where you're from, your dreams are valid."

lupita nyong'o

of visiting

2014-03-04T19:05:00.000-06:00

it's been a bit crazy here

it seems so much is going on

{especially}

"hi mom there is someone very special to me that i want you to meet"

{Sigh}

that special someone would travel 20 hours to visit our son

and

meet the family

{i kept reminding myself he's growing up}

{so}

the house was cleaned

poppies were ordered

french soap was placed in the bath

{oiu}

this chicken piccata was made

{and loved}

good times were had

i must admit

i kind of fell in love in with our visitor

{she is the bees knees}

many tears were shed when these sweet days of visiting came to an end

then it was on to the ice for our daughter

a new broom was ordered

drives were made

bonspiels were attended

rocks were thrown

the seniors felt it

the last speil as high school students

{time flew}

`
i welcome the stillness that has found me
a bit of hibernating is in order
since the snow is falling once again
`

this book was ordered

along with

this one

life is good
`
xo

home

2014-02-23T22:20:00.001-06:00

`
i loved reading this...

"I let it go.

It’s like swimming against the current.

It exhausts you.

After a while, whoever you are, you just have to let go, and the river brings you home."

joanne harris

hello life

2014-02-16T21:11:00.000-06:00

{a photo i put together for valentines day}
pictured is flow magazine
`
`
`

there is much i have missed these past few weeks

starting with my young man and his turning 19

how is it that i managed to be present for all 18 born days

and

be on the road for

#19

my mama heart kind of broke into a million tiny pieces

{believe me}

love can travel the distance

when it runs this deep

my daughter had a bonspiel

yes

i missed that too

{sigh}

you know what cut the deepest

her rock landed on the button

and

her team placed first

{sure did}

she called to tell me the news as soon as she got off the ice...

i cried silently holding my face away from the phone

my husband had the job interview of a lifetime

i gave him shit about how much he spent on new shoes for said interview

lol

when he walked through the door

the interviewer told him she loved his shoes

nice

{!}

oh how i love this man

{you got this babe}

hello life

dinner sometimes comes out of a blue box...

as long as you are with those you love nothing else matters

it's good to be
home
`

xoxo

travel

2014-02-08T19:27:00.001-06:00

St. Paul, Minnesota

“Travel far enough, you meet yourself.”

David Mitchell- cloud atlas
`
x.