When I first started researching and thinking about becoming vegan last year, I was excited and a bit nervous. I mean, what would I eeeeeat???

I believe in only eating food that I love, so eating is enjoyable and does not feel like deprivation.

It has taken me a while, but through a lot of trial and error over the past year I have developed certain staples in our weekly meals. These are not specific recipes per se, but my picks for the types of recipes you should experiment with to find the one that you love:

1. A smoothie recipe. Here’s mine. Yes, I do switch things up and rotate a lot of the fruits and supplements (like, right now I am totally on a spirulina kick) but in general I follow my basic recipe in the mornings. Find the recipe that you love, that’s not too complicated, and start every day with a load of fruit and leafy greens. A total no-brainer.

2. A healthy cookie recipe. I’m still perfecting mine, but right now it’s a cross between my oatmeal bars recipe and some other recipes I found on pinterest. The perfect healthy cookie recipe will have flavors you love (mine has cinnamon and vanilla) and be flexible enough that you can load it up with nuts, seeds, or dried fruits to pack in those micronutrients (I always throw in pumpkin seeds for the zinc). They can be sweetened with dates or coconut or a combination of the two. Healthy cookies are especially great for kids–Z loves them. These are just so convenient to have on hand for a snack attack.

3. A veggie burger recipe. I hate the term “burger” because that makes it seem like a substitute for a hamburger (blech!) although that word is better than the alternative “patty” (*shudder*)…But anyway! The possibilities are pretty much endless with veggie burgers you make yourself. Load it up with all sorts of great stuff–legumes, whole grains, vegetables, and super foods like chia seed or hemp seeds. My recipe right now calls for adzuki beans, oatmeal, carrots, and chia seeds. Sounds weird but it totally works. Make a giant batch and flash freeze them individually, so when you don’t feel like cooking you can always pop a veggie burger in the oven and know that you’re eating a whole lot of really great stuff. Fast food!!

4. A sauce. Mine is yum sauce right now, as you know. But there are so many great vegan sauces out there. Try a bunch! And again, you can add so much good stuff in to a sauce. Yum sauce has garbanzo beans and almonds and nutritional yeast. Kristen has a delicious Cheezy Hemp Nacho Sauce that uses hemp seeds and red peppers (I love this sauce! but my husband doesn’t so it’s not on heavy rotation at our house.) Make a sauce once a week and keep it in the fridge to add to: veggie burgers, a bowl of legumes and grains, or as a dip for vegetables.

5. A salad dressing. This one is pretty self-explanatory but again try a bunch and find at least one you absolutely love, that you can make quickly without even thinking about it. Your salads deserve the love! Last week I shared my favorite dressing recipe.

Others? I’m still recipes I’m on the lookout for a phenomenal vegetable soup recipe. I would love to find one I adore that stands up well to freezing. The basic minestrone doesn’t do much for me, but maybe I haven’t found the right flavors.

Any ideas? Or, any other recipes you think are important to have?

Wow, day thirty off of the hard stuff (sugar that is)…I did it! Phewf!

(Day one, day ten, day 18, and day 23)

No “treats” no vegan donuts, no soy (loaded with sugar) decaf lattes, no Theo chocolate (sigh), no refined sugar, no “hidden” sugars.

I did have some cheeseless pizza the other night when our family went out to dinner, and I didn’t ask if it had sugar in the crust or the sauce. But who am I kidding, I’m pretty sure it did. Ah well, I say this month still counts!

So how was it?

The physical cravings weren’t too bad. As I have said the clear “no” was so helpful (that was a surprise, usually I feel resentful of black-and-white thinking around food). And I didn’t really experience any physical detox symptoms.

I am truly surprised I didn’t have more physical detox symptoms as I feel like I was eating a fair amount of sugar before, especially on weekends. Maybe it was because otherwise I eat a clean, whole foods vegan diet?

Or maybe I need to give up gluten too? I did continue to eat bread this month. I am curious about wheat flours and how they impact blood sugar. (Note to self: research that.)

So all in all, the physical stuff? Not so bad.

But oh, onto the emotional stuff!

I have to preface this by saying I am not an “energetic” /visualization kind of person. I believe that such a level of experience exists of course, but it has never been something that I felt drawn to before. I feel much more comfortable with emotions or intellect as my primary means of experiencing my inner world.

(Many people I respect work on the energetic level, it’s just that it has never been my thing.)

And yet, energetic is the best way to describe what happened to me this month. About two weeks ago I felt gripped by this intense darkness, a feeling close to depression or despair.

It was just there. It didn’t feel connected to anything going on in the present moment. I knew instinctively it was something coming up because I didn’t have sugar to stuff it down.

And then this past week I gained some more clarity around the shape of the darkness.

I don’t know how to explain it other than I have a persistent vision in my head: it’s a dark inky stain, centered on my chest and radiating outward to cover my entire torso.

Whaaa?

Okay. What do I even mean by that? Again, I am sooo not an energetic/visualization/chakras-whatever kind of person. So even writing this feels completely bonkers to me. And yet. I keep seeing this in my mind’s eye. Whenever I think, what’s going on here? I see the vision appear in my head. That’s the only way I can describe it.

So, okaaay. Interesting.

What do I know about the inky stain? I know it’s related to my heart. It has a deep fear that can never be comforted and need that can never be filled. It holds hurt and it also holds love.

Also, I do not think it is mine. At least not completely. I think it is old, legacy stuff.

It feels like a covering, a costume I put on at some point very early on. It is something someone gave me or I took on, but it doesn’t belong to me.

What now?

Honestly, fuck if I know.

There’s this vision. I have no idea what to do with it or even if anything needs to be done with it. For now I am just holding it here and looking at it from time to time. Part of me wonders if this whole last year, starting with going vegan, has been a clearing-away so that I could find out what was underneath everything.

Am I going to continue my sugar-free trial after the month of April?

Oh yes. I have to see where this is going.

30 more days, sugar-free at least until the end of May!

So–anyone else ever experience anything like this? (And by “this” I mean giving up sugar, having visualizations, going bonkers, and/or all-of-the-above!)

A weekly list of things I love and what’s going on with me.

I’m not sure about the official designation, but this week is the first week that feels like spring here in Seattle. To me that means taking deep breaths of warm outdoor air, clearing out old gunk, and buying asparagus on sale at the grocery store!

As part of my efforts to live a more sustainable life, I would like for our family’s food choices to be more in line with the seasons. Someday I might even have a bountiful garden, but I don’t want to get too far ahead of myself. For now, I’m just observing what’s in season and when. This is new for someone who was raised on Kraft Dinner (which, as it turns out is always in season.)

But let me ask you gardeners out there: If you were to plant one thing, right now, in the Pacific Northwest, what would it be? Something hard-to-kill and easy to incorporate into meals. I can’t handle any more dead-vegetable guilt!

I am thinking about kale. Easy to grow and we eat it every day, no matter what. Yes? No? I’m open to anything but tomatoes (painful flashbacks from Tomato Disaster aught-nine.)

I have been making my own countertop and floor cleaners with vinegar and essential oils for a while now, but I’m ready to step up to the next level (not to mention eliminate even more chemicals from our home and save some money.) So I was ridiculously excited to find these– laundry detergent and dishwasher soap. What can I say? I am a geeky green mama.

Another thing I love about this season? I am totally digging salads again. Here is my go-to salad dressing recipe, it makes even the most boring greens into a delicious treat. But then again I love pretty much anything that has tahini in it! It doesn’t have a name yet, in honor of springtime let’s call it Sunshine Tahini Dressing:

• 3/4 c olive oil
• 1/4 c lemon juice (about one medium lemon’s worth)
• 2 tbsp Tamari
• 2 tbsp tahini
• A 2-inch piece of ginger, peeled
• 3 garlic cloves

Combine all ingredients and mix in a Vitamix or food processor. Keeps in a glass bottle in the fridge for about a week (and the flavors are actually better after about a day or two anyway.)

Enjoy!

It’s starting to be that magical time of year when it’s light out late, and people are out and about in their yards after work. Our little family was no exception.

Mama may be in possession of two giant brown thumbs but there is hope for Z yet. Or maybe he just likes playing in dirt.

So mentioned in a previous post that I was looking for some ideal lunch solutions. I’m happy to report I’ve been doing some experimenting and now I’m pretty well set for lunches.

First, I must warn you I’m not what you would call a foodie. My criteria for a great lunch are as follows: super-quick, yummy, healthy, uses up leftovers, and doesn’t require a microwave (I do own a microwave but it kind of gives me the willies, I try to use it as little as possible.) And did I mention quick? Let me mention it again.

Notice I do not mention unique, exciting, or perfectly pairing delicate flavors. Just so you know. Here goes…

1. Vegan-dilla

Who needs queso? Not me! Tortillas are good for way more than just Mexican food.

Heat up a little dab of oil on a skillet on medium.

Slather any kind of spread (guacamole! hummus! yum sauce!) on a tortilla. Place the tortilla spread-side-up flat on the skillet.

Then, on one half of the tortilla, spoon in anything you have leftover that more-or-less goes with your spread: beans, rice, vegetables, lentils, whatever. Using a spatula, flip over the other half the tortilla to make a half-moon shape.

Flip the entire thing and keep sautéing until it has browned a bit, then remove from heat. Cut up with a pizza cutter into little triangles, or eat it whole. Brand new meal! This one is great for kids.

Bonus: use a cast iron metal skillet and add some iron to your meal.

2. Bowl o’ Mush

Not the most appetizing name I suppose, but I call it like it is. Don’t be put off though, this super-easy tactic is one of my faves. I often have leftover grains from dinner the night before: brown rice, quinoa, barley, whatever.

Take a can (or a box*) of soup, heat it up on the stovetop, and add the grains to it so they mix together and get heated up as well.

Add nutritional yeast or hemp seeds (or a mixture of both, if you have some leftover from the awesome broccoli recipe) for a little more flavor, and to raise the nutrient profile. Plus, this can stretch a box of soup to about 2-4 meals.

If you have leftover veggies, even better. Throw ‘em in! Bowl full o’ mush, woo!

(*I love the new box soups from Dr. McDougall’s and Fig Organics, I feel much better about the packaging than cans.)

3. Wrap it Up

Another way to use a tortilla.

Whatever you ate the night before…grains, tofu, legumes…just wrap it up into a tortilla (regular flour, brown rice, spelt…oh there are so many varieties of tortilla). If you have some lettuce or tomato, or a sauce of some kind, great. You can heat the whole thing up in a toaster oven or eat it cold.

This is also a great to-go lunch, wrap it in some tinfoil and take it with you.

How about you? What do you eat for lunch when you have zero time and don’t feel like cooking at all?

It’s day 23 outside of the matrix!  (Day one, day ten, day 18.)

This week has been different than my last reports. I still don’t have any physical detox symptoms, but I have definitely felt more cravings for sugary items.

The most intense craving I had was the other night when my husband was eating some dark chocolate. I sat there and stared at him and for the first time thought, oh yeah, I really want some of that.

But since I had my “clear no” in place, I got to think about why that was. It wasn’t the physical craving but the emotional desire to check out: it had been a very loooong day of parenting, with an especially stressful bedtime routine. (I am seriously over teething! Unfortunately, Z is not, poor little boo has his canines coming in now, wah!)

I just wanted to sit and mindlessly stuff my face with something sugary.

Which brings up another issue I have with giving up sugar overall: what will I do when I want to do something mindless?

Mindless.

I strive to be present most of the time, of course, but sometimes I just want to check out. Being mindful all the time is a nice thought, but not realistic as a give-up-sugar plan–since wiser souls than I make a lifetime practice of mindfulness.

I need downtime, or an escape, but one that’s not destructive to my body (or my mind, as check-check-checking the internet on my phone is another go-to escape at the moment.)

For example yoga is great, but I don’t think I’m evolved enough to be all “oh, I just replaced sugar with yoga!” (Also: parenting a toddler is very conducive to sneaking sugar breaks, not so much yoga breaks.)

Overall, it feels like I’m going through an emotional detox. This weekend my brain went to some darker places that I hadn’t visited in a while. I think I may be feeling and releasing old pains that have been held in my body.

For now, I’m just sitting with these feelings. The exhaustion and frustration at the end of the day, the not-knowing.

Seeing where they touch on old reserves of pain, and seeing what I can feel and then let go.

A weekly list of things I love and what’s going on with me.

I love it when veganism is covered in the mainstream press–like this NYT article about The Challenge of Going Vegan. I definitely experienced most of the challenges that they mention (lack of social support, the expense).

However, they also talk about how it is hard for most Americans to develop a taste for “meat alternatives” and “dairy alternatives”…and I want to shout from the rooftops–don’t try to replace meat and dairy with fake versions of meat and dairy!! It works sooooo much better if you explore other food groups and expand your repertoire of vegetables, grains, legumes, nuts and seeds. There is so much bounty in the natural world. I feel like I eat more variety now than I did before, not less.

But yeah, as I talked about in my last post, it is really, really hard to go outside the mainstream when it comes to food choices. So when we think of “going without” meat and dairy we immediately think of substitutions, rather than re-thinking what constitutes a meal. As one of the researchers said in the article:

The dominant social-cultural norm in the West is meat consumption.

For me, the time was right to make this kind of shift. It would have been much more difficult (likely impossible) if I had attempted to overcome these challenges when I was in a different phase of my life: working 9-5 in a cubicle job with company-provided food and treats in the kitchen, or when I was a single freelancer going out multiple nights a week. These days I stick pretty close to home and have a schedule that allows me to make almost all of our food.

Anyone else out there trying to go against this norm? How is it working for you?

Class figures into this too, of course, as it does with any movement toward more “environmental” (read: expensive, for the most part) lifestyles. My friend Amber is exploring this topic in Environmentalism and Privilege and Embracing a life of Less with her usual thoughtfulness.

I’m cringingly aware of the irony involved in buying pricy environmentally-friendly non-toxic products, in an effort to live a greener lifestyle. And yet I can’t help but think of that old adage–you can have it cheap, quick, or good. (With “good” being “green” in my example.) Many of the frugal choices involve investing lots of time instead, which I have little of as well.

My ideal is when I find a trifecta like homemade cleaning products made from vinegar–cheap, quick and green. (Of course, now I can’t help but think even those require some knowledge, which took time to gain, so maybe not a trifecta at all–but that I enjoy researching, whereas I do not enjoy things like DIY sewing projects. Hmmm.)

And speaking of embracing a life of less, I just started reading Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids. It’s not available on Kindle (gasp!) so I am working my way through very slowly. In general, I love the mission of protecting childhood that is woven throughout the Waldorf philosophy. So much for me to learn!

One last thing–if you related to my breastfeeding post at all, then you must read Breastfeeding-My Little Slice of Hell by the Pregnant Chicken. (Also? If you are pregnant and haven’t seen Awkward Pregnancy Photos then you must, now.)

Day 18 outside of the matrix! (See updates from Day one and Day ten.)

Things are continuing along pretty well–though I seem to have an increased propensity for raisins, lara bars, and (sugar-free) bread. I guess my body is saying fine, if you won’t give me sugar I’ll make my own. But even with the raisin-palooza I am feeling a little more alert in the mornings (when toddler sleep cooperates, that is.)

One thing I am struggling with is how to continue this beyond thirty days…

Not necessarily because I am dying for some sugar. It’s kind of comforting to have a clear no. Giving up sugar has been a relief, an overall positive experience–not a trial at all like I thought it might be. As much as I like slow, gentle change, it’s nice to have a distinct boundary when it comes to something that’s so addictive physically.

And yet…when I think about being sugar free for life I get a little twitchy. Again, not because I’ll miss the sugar. This is going to sound weird. But it’s because I’ll miss being a part of the world in that way.

As much as I see our society as totally screwed up by Big Food Interests, the reality is this is our culture. Sugar is a big part of the collective experience of being an American today.

I have already given up animal products, which drew a line around me: I most likely can’t eat whatever you’re throwing on the grill, I’m not going to eat turkey at thanksgiving, I probably can’t even split a pizza with you. That’s isolating. It makes me difficult. The opposite of a quick and casual, spur-of-the-moment fun times gal. (Not, if I am to be honest, that I have ever actually been such a gal. But there is an imaginary ad hoc barbecue with neighbors that I can no longer join in, dammit!)

So–am I ready to add sugar to my isolation? I do know a few people in real life who have gone sugar free as a permanent lifestyle change and they totally make it work for them. None of them are vegan, though.

I won’t be able to: grab a latte with someone, eat at most restaurants without interrogating the server about ingredients, go to my favorite vegan donut shop for a treat, eat a cracker or anything pre-packaged that is served to me without asking can I see the box please?, split a pizza with someone (even a cheeseless one, since most pizza sauce has sugar)….

Just thinking about all of this brings up a lot of resistance. Maybe I will just extend my trial, to six months, or a year, and see how I feel then. That way I can keep my clear boundary but I don’t yet have to contemplate A Lifetime Apart.

I guess this is what change feels like no matter what. There is a necessary distancing from the current sense of normal, because the current norm isn’t working.

Also: this is why I’m more convinced than ever that deep, lasting changes to the way we eat have to happen gradually. It took me a year to internalize the shift to being vegan before I could even contemplate giving up sugar. I can only imagine the spectacular crash if I had attempted some sort of hugely restrictive detox all at once!

I have been meaning to write this for a while now–I go back and forth about whether it even needs to be written. But I realized that I want to write for those of you who are in the thick of it–struggling with breastfeeding not working out like you planned.

So…when last we left our heroine she was here.

Ugh. I feel a little sick to my stomach just re-reading that post. That was a hard time.

Now is so, so much better.

Here’s what happened in between…

Z eventually took a bottle, although it didn’t happen right away, more like 5 months in. That made things a bit easier.

Around six months, we started introducing solids. Although I was planning on doing baby-led-weaning I ended up doing a hybrid so that he could get as many calories as possible. I was still very, very anxious about his weight (up until about 14 months. Aw heck, I still am a little bit.)

At ten months, on the advice of our naturopath, we switched to an alternative formula. We used a recipe of plant milks, full-fat coconut milk, flax oil, and carrot juice. That made me feel much, much better about how what we were feeding Z squared with the research I was doing as I transitioned our family to a plant-based diet.

Now, at sixteen months, Z is still breastfeeding (with no supplements) and it’s completely natural and easy.

(Whoa. Seriously. I never thought I would be able to write that last sentence.)

To those of you who are struggling through stressful weigh-ins, doctor visits, lactation consultant appointments, and all sorts of interventions you never would have dreamed of while you were pregnant (pumping! tube feeding! nipple shield! whaaaaa?! this is “natural”??!!), I have this to say–

First, be careful what you let into your brain.

There is a circle of people for whom breastfeeding is a huge passion and a mission. Step away from these people.

Yes, their work is wonderful and can be very inspiring. Especially back when you were pregnant and gathering information. And I absolutely agree that we need advocates for breastfeeding–to spread the word about the benefits, to influence public policy, and to fight for the right of mothers to breastfeed without stigma.

However–if you’re trying really hard and it’s not working, then letting these people in to your brain does not help. I had to unfollow a lot of “natural moms” on twitter because I could only take so many triumphant tweets about some study or other about how great breastfeeding (or, how awful formula) was.

I know, they weren’t doing this to make me feel bad, of course. But reading these things did make me feel bad. After a while I realized I needed to back away for my mental health. (You know a blog post that did help? This one.)

Now, I’m not saying that you want to go the complete opposite direction. Because when you’re trying or have tried or are heartbroken about something, the last thing you want to hear is–oh well, it doesn’t really matter anyway! (Oh no, don’t you even tell me this thing I am struggling with is not that important!)

Maybe step away from mama blogs or parenting books or forums for a little while? At least the breastfeeding wars.

This is a fragile time. Don’t let in anything that doesn’t support you and your efforts one hundred percent.

(Honestly I still get a little twitchy when I read an article comparing breastfeeding and formula, because while my baby has gotten a lot of breast milk, he also got a lot of formula.)

It’s okay to be…(hurt/angry/disappointed/whatevs)

Some people are not comfortable with grief, or any negative emotion, period. They will say things to you like “well at least you have a healthy baby!”

As if you’re not aware. As if one emotion necessarily cancels out another.

As if you cannot feel more than one thing at once.

I was overjoyed, unbelievably giddy in love with my baby. I felt so intensely blessed that I had a healthy pregnancy and he had a beautiful birth. I did not take those things for granted or one second.

And at the same time, I was heartbroken, frustrated and angry that this thing that supposedly is the most natural thing in the world wasn’t working for us.  That the research I had done and the choice I had made for my child was not available to me.

(Not to mention, exhausted by worry and just keeping up with our feeding routine.)

The last thing I needed to feel on top of all the anger and heartache was guilt for feeling my feelings.

So I want to tell you, it’s okay to mourn the easy, “natural” breastfeeding experience. It doesn’t make you any less grateful for your healthy baby.

It’s okay to feel angry when people talk about breastfeeding as if it’s the easiest thing in the world and gee, why doesn’t everyone do it…

If you can find some beauty in the tension, in feeling the joy and the sadness all at once, then that will help. (Btw, this is also the secret to life.)

And finally–Babies change really, really quickly.

I knew this intellectually, but I didn’t quite understand what it meant in our lives.

I had been reading and dreaming and preparing for so long before I had Z.  And then he was here and it felt a little bit like opening night of a play–like places everyone, THE BABY IS HERE NOW. The moment we’ve been waiting for! Everything must go perfectly!

But (hopefully) you’ll have many, many years to be in relationship with your child. Some things you will do so awesomely you’ll want to give yourself a freaking medal. Other things you will screw up royally. And all of this will happen in one day. (And again the next day.)

At the beginning, it seems like breastfeeding is so all-consuming, because feeding is the main thing you do for your baby. And you may be spending time chatting or meeting with other new moms, and there’s nothing but boobs! everywhere!

But by six months or nine months it becomes way less of the overall picture of parenting. And by the time you have a toddler it’s just a tiny part of your daily life.

Every stage feels like it will last forever until it changes in an instant.

It’s day ten outside of the Matrix!

So, how’s it going? I am probably going to jinx myself here, but so far being sugar free is not as horribly painful as I thought it might be.

It may be because my diet before this was mostly whole, vegan foods that I make at home. So I haven’t really had to deal with a lot of the OMG sugar is in everything issues. It was in my sandwich bread, and a brand of store-bought guacamole we had in the fridge, but other than that it wasn’t really “hidden” anywhere in my daily diet.

The main things I have had to change have been the “occasional treats” and Starbucks. Which I knew all along were sugary.

Have I been tempted by sugary treats?

Strangely, not as much as I thought. A public declaration helped. I mean, what kind of blogger would I be if I went back on this now? Not to mention how much I have talked to my husband about it.

I usually like to make changes gradually, because I dislike setting limits on myself, seeing some foods as “good” and others as “bad” (and therefore myself as good/bad depending on what I have eaten) –but as I mentioned that was not working for sugar.

I think what it comes down to is that refined sugar is just way too addictive. I was constantly finding myself in a grey area of “oh sure I might as well have this vegan donut/treat/whatever” and not making any progress.

I needed some clarity. And so far it’s comforting to have a clear “no” when I consider something with sugar.

Am I experiencing any benefits?

It’s too soon to say, I guess. I do feel like it’s easier to get out of bed in the mornings lately, but that varies so widely based on Z’s sleep habits that it’s as much of a coincidence as anything (although: I’m wondering what the effect of mama giving up sugar has on breast milk. Anyone know? Something else to research…)

Also: my skin feels a little bit softer. But again, that might be my imagination/confirmation bias.

How about detox symptoms?

I had a small breakout on my cheek, and things are moving along digestively-speaking. Also: I smell really bad. Like, baaad. Which also happened for a couple of weeks when I gave up dairy, so I’m hoping it will go away soon! (No hugs, people!)

What does “giving up sugar” actually mean?

Many things to many different people, apparently! I have read blogs and talked to lots of people about sugar detox and come up with everything from just giving up refined sugar to giving up all sugars (even naturally-occuring ones, including fruits.)

The definition that made the most sense to me, and which sounded like what I wanted to do is: nothing with cane sugar in it.

No cane juice, no refined white sugar. (No high fructose corn syrup or -oses either, but I wasn’t consuming any of those anyway.)

That means I’m NOT giving up: fruit, dried fruit, alcohol (though as a mom who likes to actually get something done at night after the baby goes to bed that’s already a rare event), or complex carbs.

Sweeteners I’ll use: Dates are my first choice. After that, maple syrup. After that, I am okay with agave and brown rice syrup if they’re in something I am offered but I am not going to use them myself in baking.

And finally, I am now eating bread that has honey in it. I know it’s not vegan, and therefore not ideal for me, but it all goes back to doing what I can. Which means asking: what serves me best here? I think giving up sugar is going to have a profound impact on my health, and being able to make a sandwich when I want to is something that will keep me able to do it without feeling deprived. Someday, I’ll make my own bread and it will be vegan and sugar-free. But that day is not today! (or anytime soon.)

Anyone else pulling the plug? Do tell.