soy sauce packets & epiphanies

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 07:50:00 +0000

"Liberal Media Desecrates Sarah Palin Again!"

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 20:07:00 +0000

“Indeed, if political figures stand for ideas, victimization is what Ms. Palin is all about. It is her brand, her myth. Ronald Reagan stood tall. John McCain was about service. Barack Obama has hope. Sarah Palin is a collector of grievances. She runs for high office by griping.”

[WSJ via Wonkette]

COMING SOON!

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 04:45:00 +0000

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER

isweatbutter.com has a new little sister site...

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 06:57:00 +0000

check it out at http://www.islapveganswithrawchickencutlet.com !!!

"The Only Place I'm Runnin' is the Liquor Store." [Potent Quotables]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 04:32:00 +0000

Mike: what did you pack, I don't want to forget anything.
Chuck: I packed uniforms, supplements and gym clothes.
Mike: gym clothes?
Chuck: yea, they have a 3 mile track there...
Mike: "shiiiit, the only place I'm runnin' is the liquor store."

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 04:49:00 +0000

"if you possess something that you cannot give away, then you do not possess it, it possesses you." --frank sinatra

Not to get all 'pretty woman' on you, but this is the view from the hotel room that I'm in right now... Can we talk?

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 22:47:00 +0000

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Yes, that's the Brooklyn Bridge, as seen from the fine@ss Hotel that I'm sleeping in tonight.

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 07:48:00 +0000

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

If the term 'money shot' could be applied to a drawer, I have a feeling that THIS would be it:

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 15:16:00 +0000

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

WTF is a "Pubemaster?"

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 19:11:00 +0000

i just checked google analytics to get my website stats, and found some interesting keyword searches that led people to this site. i highlighted some of my favorites, including 'pubemaster' and 'soy sauce sex.' i'm so glad to know that i contribute to the importance of the world wide web.

My Favorite Part of This FAIL is the Package of Raw Chicken Resting on This Poor Kid's Face.

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 17:59:00 +0000

[via failblog]

Regarding Jimmy Fallon's Musical Guest [Straight From My Mom's Mouth]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 05:29:00 +0000

He must be Irish cause this is stupid... Go eat some Lucky Charms." --my mom

this statement was immediately followed by: "don't twitter that, the leprechauns will come and steal my cat."

The New Fcuking Citibank:

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 05:17:00 +0000

The New F***ing Citibank - watch more funny videos

Dick of the Day. [Today in Douchebags]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 03:57:00 +0000

[Potent Quotables]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 00:36:00 +0000

[Potent Quotables]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 06:07:00 +0000

He's done more for the good in 50 days that we've had him than that goatblowing assclown did in 8 years. I love him."
--hampsterpants via jezebel

From Tonight's LiveTweet of American Idol:

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 04:41:00 +0000

i was live tweeting american idol tonight while it was live on the east coast and after this dude matt sang, the judges compared him to justin timberlake. again. they've done it just about every week, to which i responded via tweet:

it's now almost 1am on the east coast and my twitter is still getting retweets from all the people that keep passing it around. www.twitter.com/americanidol even sent me a direct message that just said "LOL." so i felt a visual aid was necessary.

and btw, my followers have doubled since yesterday's live idol tweet session... because i'm now apparently a snark.

Does The 'Treat' Make Them Less Of A Swindler?

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 03:58:00 +0000

Is a Girl Scout any less of a swindler because she gives you a box of eight cookies for your $3.50? It sounds to me like Bernie's got a bunch of daughters in the family business. But that's just me.

[Potent Quotables]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 19:54:00 +0000

Context: A Friend Was Complaining About Feeling "Plugged Up" After A Long Night Of Drinking, Followed By Me Suggesting A Diner For Breakfast:

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 19:25:00 +0000

That oughta lube the tube." --me

Is It Possible To Simultaneously Have An Orgasm & A Heart Attack? Because I Think This Might Just Do It.

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 19:07:00 +0000

The Eggless Bacon & Cheese Omelette
[via baconbaconbacon]

Once Again, FAILblog Doesn't Disappoint:

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 18:42:00 +0000

[via failblog]

Laundry FAIL

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 20:17:00 +0000

although i'm sure this tag is in a t-shirt from an über-hip thread shop like busted tees or threadless, i'm sure it wasn't meant to be noticed. and if by some chance you have no life and happen to read your t-shirt's care tag, it's placed there in hopes of putting a smile on your face, if only for one second, before you go off on some feminist rant.

this was posted on failblog this morning and has a very special meaning to me. growing up i lived in a house with two older sisters, a mom and a grandma, so it was a rare occurrence that i ever had to do my own laundry. that was, until one day after watching an episode of sally jessy raphael about chauvinist asswipes, i was STUPID enough to say out loud, presumably after being asked to put the load of wash that was in the washer into the dryer, that "LAUNDRY WAS WOMEN'S WORK." needless to say, i've been doing my own laundry since about the third grade...[photo via failblog]

According to Google Analytics, 36% of all traffic from search engines that led to this site last week included the words 'head' and/or 'cheese'.

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 14:45:00 +0000

[photo via offalgood]

tony@isweatbutter.com (tony a.k.a. isweatbutter) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 14:08:00 +0000

“Some strangers become more important to you than family, maybe because you’re not expected to love them. You can leave them whenever you want to. Every moment together is a choice.”

--Walter Kirn