sp0oo - seriously funny!

100 Pallets

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 17:08:00 +0000

There are 100 pallets that I did not order in my yard.

Don Hertzfeldt's Rejected Cartoons

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 03:23:00 +0000

Don Hertzfeldt's Rejected Cartoons

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 03:23:00 +0000

Quote of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 03:22:00 +0000

Who just farted?

Holy Crap

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 16:41:00 +0000

Not Who You Want To Sit With...

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 16:36:00 +0000

Wal-Mart Bingo Card

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 16:32:00 +0000

Just print it out and take it with you next time you need to go shopping!

Nuff Said

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 16:46:00 +0000

You would too, if it happened to you

Attention all sp0oo Members

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 17:30:00 +0000

If you would like your photos, videos, articles, etc. to appear on the sp0oo homepage, simply put sp0oo me at the end of your post and we will add it, along with your name and a link to your member profile. Anonymous submissions are also accepted. Also, if you have any ideas, suggestions, or random comments to make sp0oo better, send an email to sp0oo@sp0oo.com

If the Matrix was run on Windows

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 17:19:00 +0000

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 07:16:00 +0000

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 07:15:00 +0000

A Thermometer's Woes

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 07:46:00 +0000

     There are most definitely times when happiness is measured in degrees; but the same goes for my sadness…

     Frankly, I can’t stand the hypocrisy. These people think I’m disgusting but I submit that they are the truly unclean creatures. The missus puts me in her rectum one day and straight to junior’s mouth I go on the next, without even getting a bath. And then they wonder why the flu spreads through the family like an Australian bushfire.

     At times though, I prefer the ass over the armpit…at least I feel like a man, not a dirty jock strap. But no matter how I look at it, I know Galileo never intended for me to be put in places where the sun don’t shine.

     The worst days are when bits of undigested food make their way through the colon, the duodenum, the ileum, the jejunum, all the way to the sphincter. And I must say, the old lady’s a mighty fine cook when it comes to Asian cuisine. Of course, the posterior end of the food’s travels can be grotesque; the other day I was wearing an undigested popcorn kernel as a hat.

     Competition never leaves the life of a thermometer either, but my work is not appreciated. The barometers are always bragging they deal with tough elements of nature outside. But I know the elements of nature…and how quickly three platters of refried beans can traverse the human GI tract without warning.

+ for a thermometer
Deep penetrations in females

- for a thermometer
Deep penetrations in males.

Digested food in my face.

Undigested food in my face.

No union.

Foul odors.

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 06:44:00 +0000

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 06:44:00 +0000

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 07:46:00 +0000

Of the Time I Was Lost in Yemen...

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 04:28:00 +0000

      Alas! Hell hath no fury like the desolation of a lost American in Yemen! Little did I realize when I stepped off that bus, it would be the last time I heard English spoken in quite some time. 53 hours and 14 minutes to be exact.
     The location where we had stopped was about 44 miles from the last stop on the trip—our hotel. After retrieving all belongings from said hotel in Sanaa, we were going to head for the airport on camelback to catch our flight home, 9 hours from when the heartless, punctilious bus driver stranded me. Not having my passport was a bummer, but I was carrying my PSP, a couple rubber bands, four paper clips, a small bottle of shampoo I took from the hotel, and a broken pencil, not to mention wearing a gold watch and chain. Water was essential at this time of day in the hot, arid climate, but there was no water to be found as I trudged purposefully on down the uneven road. I knew I needed hydration so I found a couple sticks, and, using a rock, sharpened the end of one. With the rubber bands, paper clips, and other stick I constructed a clumsy bow with which to fire the misshapen arrow I had whittled. The reason for this was that I saw some birds pecking holes in cacti to reach the nectar inside, and they were flying so I knew it wasn’t poisonous cactus juice.
     “Maybe I shall also be able to fly after imbibing the ambrosial fluid,” I thought begrudgingly. I fired the arrow into a cactus, scaring the small flock of razor-beaked, bluish-green, bushy-haired birds into flight. I knew I would need more of the liquid than I could drink at that moment, so I stored some of the ooze for my journey by soaking my shirt. I then commenced licking up as much as I could while resting. After my brief respite, I continued my arduous amble in the direction the bus was heading.
     Nobody at the stop had spoken English or Latvian, in which I am semi-fluent, but as I was walking I heard the approach of a horse-drawn cart behind me, occupied by an ostensibly poor farmer who had the bright look of one who knows how to use his mind. I quickly flagged him to stop and motioned with my hands for a ride to the airport. The several failed attempts at the bus stop had caused me to lose all hesitation in the proceeding. He looked at me skeptically, so I tendered my PSP and watch to him. His eyes opened wide as he smiled and graciously beckoned me to join him on the front seat. When I noticed his jug of water and a sack of some sort of grain I offered my gold chain to him as an exchange. He immediately accepted and stored his newly acquired goods in a small satchel under the seat.
     This blessing in a horse cart finally allowed me to reach the airport, just 10 minutes shy of my flights departure. I couldn’t get inside the airport but the flight boarded outside so I ran to the fence and shouted to my fellow students. And the rest, as they say, is history. Incidentally, I sued the school for not keeping better tabs of the students.

Quote of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 21:08:00 +0000

The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.

~Thomas Jefferson

Video of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 05:52:00 +0000

The greatest bit of sarcastic complacency ever.

Video of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 05:46:00 +0000

This may be the worst video I've ever seen. The only word I can think of to describe it is rizzenfliff.

Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 18:10:00 +0000

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 18:09:00 +0000

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 00:12:00 +0000

Your Governors at work.

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 18:46:00 +0000

Image of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (sp0oo) — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 18:45:00 +0000

Talk about losing your head