What is Binga doing sitting on my Airport Extreme? I bet she is the one who got it dirty!

She does not even know how to supervise right. She is falling asleep on the job.

Because of the recent publication of his awesome new book, Cat Daddy, My Cat From Hell star Jackson Galaxy has been doing lots of interviews with cat bloggers. But you know how it goes: the ones who are interviewing him are humans and they are asking him things from a human’s perspective. That is important — after all, they are the ones who need to know how to better communicate with us cats. But humans don’t always ask the most important questions, which is where I come in. There are things you kitties want to know about Jackson and it is up to me to ask them! Here is what Jackson had to say to me — I think you will find his answers enlightening:

Tell me for real, Jackson — even though you are called a “cat behaviorist,” the truth is you are really a human trainer for us cats. Wouldn’t you say that is closer to what you really do?

That’s right Sparkle, I am a human trainer for cats! Honestly it’s all about what I talk about, which is “cat mojo.” Humans have to understand why cats do what they do, why they need to occupy space, why they need to hunt, and catch and kill and eat, and when they do that, they’ll stop blaming them for all the other things that are going wrong in their lives!

Of course, to be able to translate that to humans, you had to have had the right trainers yourself. From reading your book, it is clear that Benny — your main feline trainer — had a lot to teach you. What would you say was his most valuable lesson?

The most important lesson that Benny taught me was, basically, patience. He taught me how to watch a situation from a detached perspective, to let the situation breathe as opposed to being reactive and getting angry, and taking his behavior as a slight, or taking it personally. Benny wasn’t trying to piss me off, Benny wasn’t trying to aggravate me, Benny was actually trying to communicate with me. But I had to learn his language, and it took me 13 years to do that.

That is so important for humans to understand, Jackson! They take things so personally when really, we are just trying to cope with situations in our own way. Do you think your creative endeavors have enabled you to be a better kitty communicator? I’ve noticed that creative, right-brained humans often have more of an affinity with us non-verbally oriented creatures.

You’re really perceptive Sparkle, because as a musician, as a songwriter, as an actor, as a performance artist, my whole life was based around observation, creating reality in a stranger, and then recreating that reality in myself. Just working with what I had. Cats give you so much and yet they don’t give you English. That to me is an advantage — it allows my imagination to work, and then I get to work with science as well. It’s the best of both worlds.

Why do you think so many humans have issues with their cats? What are they doing wrong?

Sparkle, I think that many humans have trouble with their cats because they try to put them in a box that’s non-cat. They try to define them in human terms or even in dog terms. They try to define cats in terms of a being that wants to do something for them. And Sparkle, you obviously don’t want to do anything for anybody besides yourself (just don’t tell [your human] about that).

Oh, she already knows! My biggest problem with her is she thinks she is part cat and, well… she is just not that cool! If a human could do just one thing to start having a better relationship with their cat, what would it be?

Again Sparkle, you know this, if you want your human to have a better relationship with you, the number one thing is [for her] to detach emotionally, and watch. Become a better “cat detective”; what do all of your body signals mean? What do you do at certain points of the day? When your cat walks in the room, where is he/she looking? Where does he/she want to get to? What does he/she want from you, and what does he/she want from the other animals in the house? These are the things that just by watching, and not from a human perspective, but using your “cat mojo,” you can have a much better, more fulfilling life with your cat.

Which is why I am so glad you are around, Jackson — you teach humans the gift of observation and forge a line of communication between us and humans. Our behavior is all so much clearer to them once you have explained it! Thanks so much for taking the time for my interview.

If you can’t see the above video, click here to watch it on YouTube

For this week’s Photo Hunt theme, my human wanted me to pose with this litter scoop.

I was so not into this idea! Talk to the tail!

Not too long before my human’s boyfriend got the big new TV, he also got a combination DVD and VHS player. He wanted to be able to record some of his old videos to DVD, but my human has been using it as an excuse to pull out her ancient exercise videos. Lately she has been revisiting her old step workouts.

Can you see the video in the background, next to the Propel bottle? It is called Reebok Step Rhythm & Moves and it is from 1998!

She isn’t putting the risers underneath the step yet because she is not sure if she can remember all the choreography. But that does not matter because I don’t think I will let her use the step today at all.

Nope. Not moving.

See that Apple Airport Extreme sitting on the corner of my desk? That is where I like to sit while I am supervising my human. Sitting over there, I am not hovering, but if I need her attention, it is easy to walk up and poke her.

But my human finally just noticed, after months of my constant supervision, that the Airport Extreme wasn’t the pure white it is supposed to be!

You mean I have been sitting on that?

How embarrassing! Somebody will have to pay.

My human saw Binga enjoying the sun and the open window the other day and decided to get fancy with the camera. The next three shots were taken from the side… in the small crack between the window frame and the wall, where the joint is. From that angle she could only get half of Binga.

Now maybe Binga will stop trying to horn in on my photo sessions for a while!

I just found out that May 6–12 is Be Kind to Animals Week, which means my human has already messed it up because I certainly don’t think I got anywhere near enough kindness from her yesterday! She will just have to work that much harder for the next six days. In fact, I thought I had better give her — and your humans — some suggestions. Humans’ ideas of being kind to us kitties don’t always jibe with what we want, so they need some direction.

• Put down that camera! Enough of the paparazzi action. Let us have some peace this week. If you have a blog, your human can use old photos.

• No inappropriate touching! This differs with every kitty. I personally do not like being kissed or picked up. Other kitties don’t like their tummies touched. So none of that this week.

• Extra doses of appropriate touching. Again, this differs with every kitty. My idea of appropriate touching is a good brushing. Other cats have special strokes they like and some even like (ugh!) to be kissed. So lots of that, please.

• Extra-special homemade gourmet treats. I don’t think I need to elaborate on that. You know what your cat likes, you go the extra mile.

• If your cat is napping in your lap or pressed up against you in bed, do not move, no matter what. It is not kind to disturb the kitty. Okay, in case of fire or other natural or manmade disaster, you can move your cat.
• The word “NO” is banished from the house for the week.

• Volunteer at a local rescue and be kind to some other kitties… but make sure to get rid of their scent before coming home. Smelling like other cats is not kind to your cat!

Do you kitties have more ideas on how your human can be kind to you this week?