Speak Schmeak

Drop the low and high scores to read your audience better

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 24 May 2013 08:23:30 PDT

If you've ever watched the Olympics, you've probably seen figure skating, diving or gymnastics, three sports that are scored by judges, as opposed to sports that are scored by time, speed or distance achieved.

Because scoring can be subjective, these sports all have a built-in protection against bias: The low and high scores in each event are discarded, leaving the remaining scores to be averaged, combined or otherwise calculated in some (usually highly technical) way.

If you ask your audience to fill out evaluations or give any kind of feedback after your presentations, you will also discover bias among your "judges."

Some audience members will love you to pieces no matter what you say or do. Some will just not click with you, no matter what you say or do. The rest will be along a continuum somewhere in the middle.

As I wrote in this blog post, paraphrasing Scott Ginsberg, it's far too easy to dwell on the 10% who have negative things to say, rather than the 90% who are more positive. But the truth is, there will always be that top and bottom 10%, who are both probably equally unreliable indicators of the overall quality of your presentation.

When analyzing your evaluations, or even if you're just analyzing your audience's reactions in the moment, remember to discard the highest and the lowest "scores," and you'll have a more accurate reading of how your audience is truly responding to your presentation.

List-a-Palooza kicks off May 30!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 21 May 2013 15:50:46 PDT

Have you heard of List-a-Palooza?

It's a 90-day list-building challenge organized by PJ Van Hulle to see how rapidly you can grow your e-mail list.

I did this challenge last summer and I've signed up again, because it's full of practical tools, it's fun, and it's FREE!

With a profitable e-mail list you can:

* Attract more clients and sales

* Turn current clients into repeat clients

* Fill your seminars and programs

* Promote other peoples' programs that you believe in and earn $1,000s in affiliate commissions

During the 90-Day Challenge, you will:

* Receive weekly accountability check-ins for tracking your results so that you accelerate your path to more subscribers (and more sales!)

* Get access to TWO training calls each week with some of the world's top list-building experts to share their hottest strategies and tactics with you for massively growing your list.

* Be invited to participate in a weekly "Power Hour" in which we all get online together at the same time to implement ONE specific list-building tactic (this was quite fun and I met a ton of new people).

Click here to get FREE access.

Join me and let's build our lists together!

Does your audience say you made their day?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 15 May 2013 13:25:58 PDT

On a recent teleseminar, one of my participants mentioned that his audiences are frequently attending for CEUs, and that they weren't particularly enthusiastic about being there.

And we've all had audiences like that, who are mandated for one reason or another, and aren't there by choice or because they're particularly interested in our topic. When our audiences are less than enthusiastic, it's tempting to be unenthusiastic ourselves.

It's tempting to just go through the motions because, hey, they don't want to be there anyway. And believe me, I've seen my share of this kind of presentation.

But guess what: You could turn someone's day completely around. You could actually give them value for their time that they would appreciate and remember.

Here's an example: My husband recently attended a conference on the East Coast. It wasn't his choice to go; he was sent by his company, and he wasn't very excited about it.

On day one, he texted me to say that the first presentation was so great that the whole trip was worth it.

Now, couldn't you do that for someone?

Why not make your presentation the best possible experience for them, anyway? So that when they leave they say, "I'm really glad I came."

Take the time to make the little things count. Craft an engaging opening. Wrap up with a strong closing. Incorporate audience interaction. Tell stories, use analogies, make it interesting. Connect.

Do all the things you do when your audience wants to be there. Make it fun for yourself and for them, too.

Give them an experience that erases the ho-hum attitude they walked in with, and replaces it with "The whole trip was worth it."

A presentation tool you don't want to be without!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 06 May 2013 10:51:15 PDT

A quick video tip for you today: A presentation tool you don't want to be without!

Here's where to find the GigaWare 4-port travel hub.

Giving back, doing what I love

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 03 May 2013 12:25:26 PDT

Click to see full size

I'm feeling very privileged today to have been awarded Women's Economic Ventures' 2013 Santa Barbara County Volunteer of the Year at their Empowerment is Priceless breakfast.

I completed WEV's Self-Employment Training (SET) in 2004, for a jewelry business I had started after being laid off three times in four years from nonprofits that kept running out of money for my positions.

It was one of my classmates who, after hearing me speak for the nonprofit I had co-founded, asked if I could help her present herself better to represent her business.

The light bulb went on -- coaching, training, speaking, teaching! -- and the rest is history. Everything I learned from WEV about starting my first business I then applied to my second, and 7 and a half years later I'm still here, growing and thriving, with a soft spot for working with entrepreneurs and nonprofits.

And lucky for me, the majority of the volunteering I do for WEV is speaking in classrooms. You don't have to twist my arm to get me to wax eloquent about my WEV experiences and successes, or to share my tips about business networking and using social media and speaking to grow your business. It's only my favorite thing to do.

WEV is dedicated to creating an equitable and just society through the economic empowerment of women, and their programs, including SET, the Business Plan Intensive, SET to Launch, Thrive in Five, coaching, consulting and their Small Business Loan Fund, have helped thousands of women start, grow and thrive in their businesses.

The WEV sisterhood is strong here in Santa Barbara (there are also men who go through the program and I'm including them in the "sisterhood"). When SET grads meet, we have an immediate connection. Even those whose business ideas turned out not to be viable still know they can always start again. We have the knowledge, the tools and the support whenever we need it.

As much as getting this award makes me feel like maybe I should retire, I will keep volunteering for WEV as long as they ask me and as often as they ask me!

Pictures from the event to follow...

Never give up on your speaking goals

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 02 May 2013 17:49:52 PDT

Click to see full size. From Funders and Founders.

On a recent call in a group coaching program I'm part of, our coach used the graphic to the left as the topic of discussion. As an entrepreneur, I could relate to everything in the graphic and how resiliency is a hallmark of successful entrepreneurs. If every setback makes you feel like quitting, then you're not cut out to be an entrepreneur!

I found that the concepts in this graphic also happen to apply to speakers, so I'm going to share my thoughts with you on resiliency and "not giving up" for speakers.

1. Stay alive

The graphic says, "As long as you are alive, anything is still possible."

This goes for those of you who tell me, "I'm going to bore the audience," or "I'm never going to feel confident onstage," or "I always forget what I wanted to say," and a million other similar statements of defeat.

As long as you are alive, anything is possible. Every time you get on stage, you have the opportunity to prove yourself wrong! Every time you get on stage, you have another opportunity to improve as a speaker.

Of course, if you don't get on stage, none of these opportunities present themselves, so you have to actually get the speaking engagements on your calendar in order to learn and grow from them. But there's no reason to give up. You have all the time in the world!

2. Lower your expectations

The graphic says, "99.99% of success took TIME."

Once you start getting those speaking engagements and making them happen, you still have work to do. You still have to practice, you still have to revise and refine your content, you still have to figure out what works with your audiences.

Getting better as a speaker takes time. It takes work. If you're willing to put in the time and do the work, you will improve. You might even become great!

3. Stronger

The graphic says, "You are stronger than you think."

So many fears and anxiety come from the "what ifs" of speaking. What if I lose my place? What if I tell a joke and it's not funny? What if I can't remember what I was going to say? What if I can't answer their questions?

Guess what: Those things will happen. Every single one of them. And more. And you'll survive. You'll move on. You'll even laugh about it later.

None of those things is the end of the world and, in fact, every single person in your audience has had the same experience, so they can empathize.

And if they haven't had the same experience, it's because they haven't put themselves out there in the world like you have. But they'll at least sympathize, so don't worry.

4. Persist

The graphic says, "Try lots of different things."

Every audience is different, and sometimes you'll find that one audience responds really well to a story or an activity, but another doesn't. That's okay. Keep trying new things. If something works well for most audiences, keep it, but remember that every audience has its own culture, and sometimes things just don't resonate. That doesn't mean it's wrong, it's just wrong for that audience.

Keep tweaking and adjusting so every audience has the best experience you can give them.

5. Fake it

The graphic says, "Fake success before it's real."

As a speaker, whether or not you feel strong, powerful, confident or ready, you have to get on that stage and deliver. Look confident on the outside with good posture, good eye contact, a well-projecting voice and purposeful movement, and the audience will perceive your confidence, even if you're not quite there yet on the inside.

The good thing about faking it is that your inside will likely follow along until you're not even faking it any more.

6. The dip

The graphic says, "Right before success, you will face the worst."

I think we all agree that sometimes something has to go really wrong before we're willing to take action to fix it. You can be gliding along, giving the same canned presentation to lukewarm audiences for a long time. But one of those audiences is going to rebel. You're going to get bad evaluations or you're going to face challenges from audience members. Something will happen that rocks your world and makes you feel really bad. We've all been there.

Learn from it. Take it as a sign that it's time to up your game. Don't dwell on it or let it bring you down (well - you can dwell on it for a day, but then move on). Make a commitment to excellence. Give your presentations the time, focus and care that your audience deserves.

How do you interpret the messages on the graphic as they apply to speakers? Share in the comments!

Fun Friday: Miss America introductions

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 15:26:30 PDT

I never managed to post this in January, but it's a perfect video for a Fun Friday! The Miss America pageant figured out a way to make 53 introductions fun, engaging and quick (just over ten minutes)! Enjoy the short video. I've included a few of the introductions below if you prefer to read instead.

"From the state that brought you Channing Tatum, People's Sexiest Man Alive: You're Welcome. I'm Anna Laura Bryan, Miss Alabama."

"From the state where your vote counts, and counts, and counts, I'm Laura McKeeman, Miss Florida."

"From the state that celebrates diversity -- from Scarlett O'Hara to Honey Boo Boo -- I'm Leighton Jordan, Miss Georgia."

"From the home of Abraham Lincoln -- before he was a movie -- I'm Megan Ervin, Miss Illinois."

"From the home of Aerosmith: Rock on, America. I'm Taylor Kinzler, Miss Massachusetts."

"From the state that weds 150 couples each day in Las Vegas -- Tim Tebow, what do you say we make it 151? -- I'm Randi Sundquist, Miss Nevada."

"Sandy may have swept away our shores, but never our spirit. I'm Miss New York, Mallory Hagan."

"From the state where we use sushi as bait, and no, y'all are the ones with the accent, I am Miss South Carolina, Ali Rogers."

Forget perfection: Strive for connection.

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 19 Apr 2013 14:26:51 PDT

"The adults of the last four generations have blessed our children with the destiny of a shorter life span than their own parents."

TED Prize winner Jamie Oliver has this wish:

"I wish for everyone to help create a strong, sustainable movement to educate every child about food, inspire families to cook again and empower people everywhere to fight obesity." Watch his video to see how he envisions this happening (my comments are below).

(If the video isn't showing up, go to this link.)

Jamie Oliver is a perfect example of an imperfect yet moving and memorable speaker. He paces around the stage, out of breath and talking at the speed of light, but his message is clear and powerful.

His examples are relevant: He shows a graph of causes of death in the United States and says, "We spend our lives being paranoid about death, murder, homicide -- you name it, it's on the front page of every paper, CNN. Look at homicide at the bottom, for God's sake." The first three causes of death on the chart are all diet-related.

He balances grim facts and statistics with humor and a touch of sarcasm: "School food is something that most kids -- 31 million a day, actually -- have twice a day more than often, breakfast and lunch, 190 days of the year. So you could say that school food is quite important, really, judging the circumstances." He gets a laugh from the audience.

He offers practical solutions: "Under the circumstances, it's profoundly important that every single American child leave school knowing how to cook ten recipes that will save their life.... If you can cook, recession money doesn't matter. If you can cook, time doesn't matter."

His graphics, video clips (children who don't recognize tomatoes, potatoes or cauliflower; a mom who believes she's killing her children with food) and images are chosen wisely. He even interacts with the audience, asking for a show of hands -- I rarely see anyone do this at TED. He's passionate, persuasive and driven. You can't help but want to see his vision come true. You can't help but want to jump on board, somehow.

Isn't this really what matters in a speaker? Isn't this the kind of presentation an audience really wants to spend time listening to? Isn't this the kind of presentation that makes an impact on a person and inspires change?

I'm so tired of the um-obsessed, gesture-memorizing, rule-based culture of speaking. I'll take an exuberant speaker with a compelling message whose skills and techniques are rough over a rehearsed-to-death speaker any day.

Maybe I'm in the minority, and maybe not for long.

Be a better moderator: Stay out of your head

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 17:34:57 PDT

Photo Credit: net_efekt via Compfight cc

The topic of "being present" during presentations or while waiting to be introduced to speak has come up a lot lately in my conversations with clients and on this blog. I find that it's one of the simplest tools to get a speaker out of the thoughts of doom in her head and into the room where she's going to speak.

Another application of this principle came to mind last week while I was reviewing a client's performance as a moderator. I noted that she had done a really good job of giving prompts and making interjections when she felt the speaker could elaborate more or explain a point better.

A lot of moderators just let the speakers go on and on and never make the effort to make the panel a better experience for the audience. After all, panels are made of of disparate speakers, who frequently don't know each other and have had no time to review questions or the format of their session. Concise speakers are mixed with long-winded. Prepared speakers are mixed with unprepared. Clever speakers are mixed with dull.

Moderators are the glue that holds panels together, but they also have the role of introducer, referee, timer, coach, guide, translator and editor.

What my client did so well during her panel was listen. She stayed present with what each speaker was saying so that, if a point needed clarifying, she could make that request. If a speaker mentioned something that should be expanded upon, she could ask the speaker to elaborate. She could call upon points made by earlier speakers and tie them into a current speaker's point.

The moderator's work made the panel discussion so much smoother and more cohesive than had she just let them run with the topic. Knowing that a major speaker had pulled out of the conference at the last minute and that this panel had been assembled in the course of a day or two made the moderator's performance that much more impressive.

Just another example of how being present, listening, and not allowing yourself to go to the crazy place where dread and fear take over can make you a better speaker, whether you're on the panel or moderating it.

Could you benefit from an Advanced Speaker Mastermind?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 12 Apr 2013 13:45:17 PDT

My colleague Dr. Gloria Miele and I were brainstorming a new program yesterday and this short video is the result of our conversation. Could you benefit from an Advanced Speaker Mastermind program? We'd love your feedback!

KFC + JDRF: Still a bad idea

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 09:17:23 PDT

Did you follow the recent news about a fundraising partnership between a KFC franchise in Utah and the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation? You may have seen this photo traveling around the Web and Facebook.

People were upset to see KFC making donations to JDRF from the proceeds of giant, sugary sodas, which are typically not part of a healthy diet, especially for someone with diabetes or trying to avoid it.

Or is that even true? Well, JDRF's response to one blogger was this:

"Regarding this particular promotion, we understand that one of the criticisms has been the association with a sugary product, which many have associated with contributing to diabetes. It’s important to note that JDRF supports research for type 1 diabetes, an autoimmune disease that results when the immune system attacks the cells in the pancreas that produce insulin, therefore requiring a child or adult with the disease to depend on insulin treatment for the rest of their lives. It is a common misconception that type 1 diabetes is caused by obesity or eating too much junk food or sweets."

Well guess what, JDRF: You have two uphill battles on your hands here.

1. The general public doesn't know what kind of research you support.

2. Even if the general public knew that your research is on type 1 diabetes, they don't know the difference between type 1 and type 2 diabetes.

This is a perfect example of the "curse of knowledge," a phrase coined by Chip and Dan Heath in their book Made to Stick.

The curse of knowledge happens when we know something (usually something obscure or industry-based that is not common knowledge) and we assume others know it. Then we interact with them as though they know it, losing and confusing them in the process, and getting frustrated ourselves at how "ignorant" they are.

JDRF can be frustrated with the public for not knowing that there's no connection between type 1 diabetes and a giant, sugary soda, but most people who have heard of diabetes assume "diabetes is diabetes." They know the word, they know a lot of people are at risk of it because of poor diet, and they see this as a bad fundraising campaign.

And the public isn't wrong. Because if that's the working knowledge of diabetes that the public has, then JDRF has the responsibility to change that. It's JDRF's job to educate the public about the different types of diabetes and about the work they're doing, if they don't want to court controversy in their fundraising campaigns.

It's true that this was just ONE franchise in Utah that JDRF partnered with. But look at how far the story spread. Look at how many news outlets covered it (Google kfc jdrf to see what I mean). People are not informed about the causes of diabetes, and therefore JDRF partnering with KFC to sell giant sodas is still a bad idea.

Remember this, speakers: We all have some kind of knowledge that others don't have - it's why we're invited to present in the first place. It becomes a curse when we fail to recognize that what is obvious to us is completely opaque to someone else. Then we have miscommunication, resentment, confusion, frustration and maybe an Internet uprising on our hands!

More on the curse of knowledge:

Are you speaking your audience's language?

The curse is back!

Curse of knowledge Twitter conversation

Stop playing it safe and start owning the stage!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:16:06 PDT

Just a quick message to tell you about my upcoming teleseminar series "Speak to Engage: 7-Step Shortcut to Public Speaking Success." I'm offering an early bird special of $100 off for the first 7 people who register by Friday, April 12. Check it out!

Is your behavior consistent with your message?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 03 Apr 2013 10:18:35 PDT

Does your professional organizer's desk look like this?

It's typical for most of us humans to notice when others mess up, but to have a blind spot about our own flaws or inconsistencies. Of course, some people are overly obsessed with their own flaws, but in general, we're more likely to be blissfully ignorant. It would be nearly impossible to live our lives if we weren't.

I see this blissful ignorance frequently with professionals who teach or coach others on how to do something, but don't do it themselves. A couple of examples:

I know a consultant who used to speak to teachers about presenting information to students in different ways because of different learning styles and personality types, but when she presented, her own information wasn't presented that way. (I speak about this consultant in the past tense, because after working with me, her presentation was much more consistent with her message.)

I know a therapist/author whose topic is communication, yet she never responds to commenters on Facebook or Twitter. (I actually find that poor communication is particularly egregious in communication fields.)

I'm sure we've all seen Web designers' websites that are hard to navigate and not user-friendly, a professional organizer with a messy desk, and the occasional pastor whose actions don't exactly demonstrate "love thy neighbor."

We all do this from time to time, and it doesn't make us bad people or failures at our work. As I said in this post, if you're not "practicing what you preach," it doesn't make you a hypocrite. We're not perfect, and our behavior doesn't always match our ideals.

However, repeated inconsistency between your message and your behavior will eventually start to become noticeable to your audiences and prospects, possibly becoming damaging to your believability and credibility.

It's time to be honest with yourself. Ask yourself these questions:

** Am I practicing my own methods?

** Am I a role model for the people I hope to teach?

** Am I demonstrating the things I talk about?

If not, why not?

If you believe in the methods or the principles or the concepts and you want to persuade others to follow these principles or make attitude and behavior adjustments, you need to live them, not just talk about them.

In my abovementioned post, I said, "Always keep working to bring your image and message into alignment as much as possible." For this post, I'd like that to read "Always keep working to bring your behavior and message into alignment as much as possible."

It's not necessary to strive for perfection, but it is necessary to strive for consistency, because how others perceive you will greatly affect your ability to gain clients, customers and audiences.

Last chance to sign up for free teleseminar!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 11:12:23 PDT

There's one more day to sign up for my free teleseminar, "3 Surefire Ways to Glue Your Audience to Their Seats Without Krazy Glue, Hot Glue or Mod Podge!"

* Do you always feel like you're not prepared enough when you speak?

* Are you unsure about how to craft a presentation that actually meets the needs of your audience?

* Would you like to be seen as an authority and an expert when you speak?

* Are you struggling with how to make a lasting impact on your audience?

* Do you wish you felt more confident on the inside... and looked more confident on the outside?

Then this call is for you!

I will share some of my absolutely fool-proof techniques (and one of them is a big mental shift, so get ready...) for giving a presentation that grabs your audience's attention and keeps it, while raising your professional profile just a few notches!

We'll talk about:

* How the title of your presentation can make or break your audience's trust

* How to shift your thinking so you never bore your audience again

* The #1 thing you can do better to engage your audience from start to finish

* Why "So what?" is the most important question you can ask... yourself

* Why it's important to include emotion, not just facts and figures, in your presentation

* 7 guaranteed ways to lose the audience's attention, even if you already had it

and more...

It's all happening:

Thursday, April 4
1:00 PDT/4:00 EDT

Reserve your spot now.

Does experience = complacency for speakers?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 29 Mar 2013 11:18:43 PDT

A little too comfortable? Photo Credit: BakkoBrats via Compfight cc

I wrapped up my "SpeakUP! 8 Daily Challenges to Build Your Confidence Muscles at Work, at Home, and in Front of an Audience" program yesterday with a group call to capture the learning and successes of the members.

One group member talked about how much confidence she had speaking to a room full of students, but wasn't sure she'd have the same confidence in a room full of colleagues or superiors. And it's a valid point: in her case, she's still lifting the lighter weights, getting her confidence muscles used to lifting. When she's ready to move onto the bigger weights - speaking to more difficult groups - it won't be easy or comfortable, but she'll pick up the heavier weights and start lifting until her confidence muscles are stronger.

Even one of the veteran speakers in the group felt that she was dusting off old weights she hadn't lifted in a long time. Which brought to mind two problems that experienced speakers face that beginners don't:

1. Rust.

2. Complacency.

A veteran speaker can get "rusty" if she doesn't speak on a regular basis. She can have years of experience under her belt, but can come back to the stage with stale anecdotes, a lot of butterflies, and mistakes like forgetting to engage the audience with a strong opening. Many of us have been there, when speaking has been a part of some jobs but not others, for example. Some of us will go months or years between speaking engagements when we were once sharp as a tack.

But if you know you're rusty, you can combat it with practice and thoughtfulness.

The more insidious problem for veteran speakers is complacency, especially when we have a lot of confidence in our message and delivery. This can cause a speaker to stop working on her skills, stop trying to improve, and stop making an effort with the audience. It's a place of being too comfortable, taking it a little too easy.

You know a complacent speaker when you see one: They have good skills, they look comfortable on stage, and they know their stuff. But they also look like they don't really care, like you're just one audience of hundreds, and they could close their eyes and still be able to pace the stage in their sleep. Sometimes they even speak in a cadence that feels memorized and robotic, and sometimes they forget who they're speaking to, interjecting references that have nothing to do with your group. But they don't even notice, and they just go on with their canned speech, oblivious to the fact that they are sleep-presenting.

Veteran speakers: Don't let yourself become complacent! Here are a couple of ways to ensure you always stay a little off-balance, a little uncomfortable:

1. Be in the moment

Always be present and give your full attention to your audience -- before the presentation by researching what they need, want and care about, and during the presentation by watching their body language and facial expressions, and asking questions to make sure you're on the right track. Listen, watch, and pay attention to your audience's nonverbal and verbal feedback.

2. Keep refreshing your references

I have some old favorite stories, examples and games that I like to use in presentations, but after a while, those activities are no longer fresh. Maybe the references are out of date, or maybe it's just that something better has come along. Don't be afraid to chuck out old stuff and bring in new stuff. When your material is fresh, you feel fresh, and you come across as fresh.

3. Rethink your arrangement

Even when you've given a presentation a million times, you will still find ways to shake it up when you look at it with a new perspective. Ask yourself if your first point should maybe be your second point. Maybe your third point should really be your first point. Or maybe there's a sub-point in the presentation that needs to be elevated to a new rank. I recently reviewed a PowerPoint presentation for an upcoming conference that I've given many times, and realized that the order was completely wrong. I rearranged it and now it has a better flow, makes more sense and is a much stronger presentation. When's the last time you rearranged one of yours?

4. Keep practicing

Practicing out loud is still the best way to catch language that doesn't flow properly, words that you're not sure how to pronounce, and areas that need more audience interaction, among other things. Listen to yourself speak, pay attention to the flow, notice how long you're going without any engagement activities. Videotape your practice sessions if you really want to analyze your performance. Practicing out loud will help you catch the weak spots in your presentation that practicing in your head will not expose.

These are just a couple of ways I keep my presentations from getting stale, and keep myself from becoming too comfortable.

What do you do to keep from getting complacent when you're an experienced speaker?

Glue your audience to their seats without Krazy Glue, hot glue or Mod Podge

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 09:09:34 PDT

I hear this time and time again from clients, from audiences, from strangers who find out I'm a public speaking coach...

"How do I get the audience's attention and keep it?"

They may say it in slightly different ways, like "I'm afraid of boring the audience," or "I wish I could get the audience excited and motivated to participate," or "How can I make a greater impact on my audience?"

But they all mean the same thing:

In a world where audiences are faced with more distractions than ever (When's lunch? Who's picking up the kids from soccer? I forgot to call the vet. I love her shoes. Oooh, there's a text from my BFF!), keeping their focus has gotten harder and harder.

But when you have the skills and know the tricks to keeping your audience's attention... and getting it back again every couple of minutes... your presentations will go from *blah* and *so-so* and *what did he say?* to fun, memorable and thoroughly enjoyable.

You want to give the kind of talk where time flies and the audience is disappointed it's over so soon, instead of the kind where they're looking at their watches wondering "How much longer?"

But how do you learn these skills? It's not like there's a dedicated public speaking class just focusing on engaging the audience in your neighborhood.

Oh wait... There IS!

"3 Surefire Ways to Glue Your Audience to Their Seats Without Krazy Glue, Hot Glue or Mod Podge" is my upcoming FREE teleseminar on engaging the audience. You can access the call from the convenience of your home or office.

Sure, you can practice all the vocal techniques and hand gestures and you can even write really good content. But if you don't engage your audience, if you don't keep their attention, keep them interested and intrigued, all of that goes out the window. You've just wasted your time - and theirs.

Join me on my call and learn some of my best secrets, like:

* How the title of your presentation can make or break your audience's trust

* 7 guaranteed ways to lose the audience's attention, even if you already had it

* And the #1 thing you can do better to engage your audience from start to finish.

It's happening:

Thursday, April 4
1:00 PDT/4:00 EDT

Reserve your spot now.

See you on the call!

Do you have a parental attitude toward your audience?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 19 Mar 2013 11:46:05 PDT

As speakers, we often approach our audiences like children. We know what's best for them. We know what they need, and we're going to deliver it to them.

Sometimes we think we know what they need more than they know what they need.

And you know what? Maybe we're right some of the time. After all, I'm pretty sure most of my audiences need training on how to create more effective PowerPoint presentations.

But this "parental" attitude (or "patronizing" attitude, if we're going to be honest...) does not serve the audience.

Your audience may not know what they need -- but they know what they want. Which are frequently two different things.

Using the PowerPoint example again: I've spent waaaayyyy too much time in presentations with horrible PowerPoint slides, packed densely with information no one can read, or loaded with typos, misspellings, juvenile clipart, poorly contrasting colors that make the slide impossible to view, and more. And you have, too. Yet how many speakers are really making an effort to make their PowerPoints better? Not enough.

Because they don't think they need it.

They don't know they need it.

And if they don't know they need it, they don't need it.

Do you get my point? They are the experts on what they need. Just like we all are experts on what we need, in both our personal and business lives.

What they need and what we think they need do not always coincide.

However, your audience does know what they want, and this is something you can find out in advance.

If you're speaking to an organization, create an online survey asking questions about what your audience already knows and would like to know more about, and have your organizer share it via e-mail.

If you don't have this luxury, for example, when you're speaking at a conference, you can get some basic demographics and data from the conference organizer about who's attending, and then make sure to chat up your audience members as they arrive. Ask a couple of questions at the beginning and throughout the presentation to get a better idea of what your audience cares about.

If you're creating presentations based on what you think the audience needs, you might be getting it wrong, even if -- technically -- you're getting it right. If you build presentations around material that your audience does not find relevant, you will not succeed in changing their attitudes or behavior, no matter how right you are.

People don't always know what they need, and they're not always ready for what they need, but they do know what they want. Make the effort to find out what they want, and you might also just get lucky enough to give them what they need.

Is your communication toolbox lacking?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 15 Mar 2013 14:18:49 PDT

Glenda Watson Hyatt, a web accessibility expert and motivational speaker with cerebral palsy, recently did an excellent job of illustrating the tools she uses to communicate with friends, colleagues and audiences while navigating a significant speech impairment, including navigating the speech, hearing and vision impairments of others.

She describes how she uses technology to help her communicate, for example, text chatting on Skype (typing with her left thumb) and using her iPad with text-to-speech software. And when technology isn't helpful, she goes manual: to finger-spelling! How many of us would know how to do that? I still remember the American Sign Language (ASL) alphabet that I learned when I was a kid, but spelling out individual words would probably take me all day.

Glenda figures out which communication method is warranted in each situation, and then figures out how to accomplish it.

Unfortunately, many speakers unconsciously impose communication impairments on themselves - figuratively speaking - and are either unaware of their condition, or are aware but too afraid or reluctant to branch out and add new tools to their toolboxes.

I don't mean pulling out your iPad and using text-to-speech software. Unless you need that to communicate, it's probably not appropriate.

What I mean is using your full range of vocal and facial expression, using your full range of movement and gestures, and using images, props, audio, video and other creative avenues to get your message across. This may include using technology, like PowerPoint, but not necessarily.

I wrote a post recently about how speakers rely too much on words to convey our messages. Words alone are not enough to persuade, educate or motivate your audience, and if you want them to retain your message and do something with the information afterward, you will need to use more of your communication tools.

1. Are you using vocal variety to bring the audience into your story, to add dramatic flair when needed or to make a point with different pitch, tone or volume?

2. Are you using your hands, arms and body to paint pictures in the audience's minds, to help them imagine sizes, shapes and distance, or to nail down an idea with a strong gesture?

3. Is your face animated and flexible, changing with the the emotional flow of your talk, or do you have the same frozen expression, smile or frown the whole time?

4. And how about giving the audience something tangible to look at, hold, smell, taste, hear or see that makes your topic more relevant and concrete to them?

Glenda isn't the only speaker with impaired communication, but she's aware of her challenges and uses all the tools at her disposal to communicate as effectively as possible.

Many speakers don't bother to vary their communication methods, due to fear, ignorance, or just plain laziness.

How about you? Are you making full use of your communication abilities?

How food tastes in space

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 12 Mar 2013 12:50:50 PDT

Way back in 2008 I came across a video featuring Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield explaining to kids how a space toilet works.

I was impressed with the simplicity of his explanation, his use of humor, and his way of making science accessible, all in under two minutes.

Since then he's become quite a celebrity, most recently joining the Barenaked Ladies and the Chieftains in live musical performances from his post on the International Space Station.

Today I came across another of his videos, this time explaining how food tastes in space, and why it's hard to taste food when astronauts first arrive in space. Once again, a simple explanation, complete with props -- snacks sent up to the ISS from his fellow Canadians.

Science (finance, medicine, law, etc.) doesn't need to be boring to lay audiences. It also doesn't need to be complicated. If you want to get your message across to the widest audience, keep it simple. Not dumbed-down. Just simple. (Also see Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson's engaging way of talking astrophysics.)

It's no coincidence that you see a lot of these two men, and other experts like them. Which interview would you rather watch: A boring, dry, pompous scientist who can't connect with the audience and spews nothing but statistics and data, or an engaging, approachable, unpretentious scientist who's passionate about her topic and wants everyone else to feel the same way?

Want to get those interviews, conference presentation slots and public appearances? Be real, approachable, understandable and fun!

Who are your favorite science, political, legal, and medical experts who are great at getting their message across? Share in the comments!

Handling the pressure onstage

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 07 Mar 2013 12:44:37 PST

I've spoken to several clients this week about their concerns with thinking on their feet. This is the wild frontier of public speaking, the great unknown: "What if they put me on the spot and I don't know how to respond?"

There are the hostile or upset audience members who don't know how to communicate their discomfort in a healthy way.

There are the questions that have never been posed, so you've never thought of an answer.

And then there's this:

On American Idol last night, in a live telecast in front of millions of viewers, one of the contestants seemed to be breaking down. After some concern and criticism from the judges about his performance, Charlie Askew dutifully approached Ryan Seacrest for the "post-performance" analysis and interview.

But instead of the usual chitchat before the commercial break, Charlie made a rather unsettling statement:

“The message I was really trying to send is that a lot of people think I am a happy buoyant person a lot of the time, and the only reason I smile so much is that I have to.”

This is not the type of comment we typically hear from contestants, a snapshot into the mind of an apparently very fragile young man.

Ryan's response? He put his hand on Charlie's shoulder, looked him in the eye and said:

“Charlie, you’ve got some friends here, okay? We appreciate your courage and your honesty, and there’s nothing easy about having those feelings inside and standing up here and having to do that tonight.”

Entertainment Weekly had this to say about the exchange:

"The host's composure and instantly supportive words in the face of what seemed like an inevitable on-stage meltdown from Charlie Askew will go down in the books. All those history textbooks, with entire chapters about American Idol. We must never underestimate our often-bumbling, always-amusing host's role in ever so gently guiding these boyz II manhood."

I wish there were video, but I imagine Fox is doing everything it can to keep video of the meltdown off the Internet.

The moment was very touching, and I was infinitely impressed with Ryan Seacrest's ability to be in the moment with Charlie, be supportive, and also wrap up the interview so eloquently. Charlie was close to tears and left the stage immediately.

When you worry about thinking on your feet, worry instead about being fully prepared. Ask yourself, "What questions might come up for the audience? What objections might come up for the audience? How can I respond to these situations?"

Ryan Seacrest has been in the entertainment industry for a long time, and on American Idol since day one. I imagine he's been privy to many a contestant meltdown behind the scenes. Nothing can really prepare you for an emotional and pressure-filled moment like that one on live TV, but he pulled it off gracefully.

And so can you, with proper preparation and -- ultimately -- the mindset that you may not always be able to answer the audience's questions or objections, but you can listen, be open and be genuine in the moment when it happens.

Here are a couple of articles about dealing with difficult audiences or hecklers:

Heckle Schmeckle

When audience members attack

A simple tip to keep the nerves at bay

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 04 Mar 2013 14:14:46 PST

Do you ever sit in a meeting or at an event, dreading your turn to speak?

You know it's coming, and as as each person gives their report, shares their news, or introduces the next speaker, your heart beats faster, your palms get sweatier and your brain spins with a million thoughts -- including the usual, "What if I forget what I'm supposed to say?" and "What if I get so nervous I can't breathe?" or "What if I blow it in front of my superiors?" (Here's my experience with a similar situation from about a decade ago.)

When it's your turn to speak, not only have you whipped yourself into an anxious frenzy, but you probably weren't paying attention to what anyone else said, and you've probably missed a good part of the meeting. This is especially common when we're required to go around the room giving self-introductions.

So here's a fairly simple tip that will help you stay focused and be prepared when it's your turn to speak: Be present.

Being present means that, instead of getting lost in your own thoughts and your own bodily sensations, you focus instead on the person speaking and what's happening in the room. Make eye contact with the person speaking. Take notes. Really hear what she is saying. Maybe look around and notice what other people are wearing. Keep yourself present in the room.

When you're focused on the speaker and not your own thoughts, you will find it much easier to stay calm and not get yourself into a state of high emotion.

Distractions will occur. You'll find yourself drifting back into your thoughts and your nervousness, and as you do, just catch yourself, stop, and re-focus your eye contact and your attention onto the speaker.

This practice, by the way, is also useful in many other situations in both professional and personal life. Being present with another person or with an audience is a gift you give them of your time and attention. But it's also a gift to yourself, where you can get out of your own head and feelings for a short time, relax, and make the other person feel heard and acknowledged.

How has being present helped with your public speaking? Please share in the comments!

Speaking lessons from a social entrepreneur

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 01 Mar 2013 10:59:52 PST

I had the great pleasure of hearing Zhena Muzyka speak at a luncheon yesterday hosted by the Santa Barbara chapter of NAWBO.

I've known Zhena for a long time, as the owner of Zhena's Gypsy Tea and a vendor to the specialty foods market where my husband has worked for many years cultivating relationships with vendors. I remember when her business was new, Zhena's elaborate and exotic booths at trade shows and her beautiful belly dancing outfits. I've always admired her loving and gracious approach to her work and her customers (even those of us on the periphery who show up at a trade show once a year!).

Since those early days, her business has boomed, and she has become a titan of the socially responsible business movement and has branched out into writing, speaking and coaching.

She's a role model in many areas, and yesterday she shared her philosophy and some of the concepts that have propelled the success of her business. Not surprisingly, these concepts will also help you build success as a speaker!

1. Identify and share your mission and your calling.

This may seem a little "out there" to some of you who are giving presentations you're not particularly in love with. But bear with me.

As I've talked about before, you need to have love and gratitude for your audience, because (quoting myself) "When you allow yourself to show love and gratitude to your audience, you can't help but forget about your own woes and distractions. When you allow yourself to be open to creating a human connection with your audience where you give them all your passion and energy and receive it back, you will find your anxiety and nervousness -- if not completely conquered -- at least greatly reduced." So there's one good reason for showing love and gratitude.

But think of it this way: If your mission is only about making money, how is that serving the audience? If your mission is only about getting the next client, how is that serving the audience? That's about you, but it's not about them. And "them" is what they care about.

The audience is there to receive something of value from you. Are you giving them what they need, want and care about?

You must always have a deeper mission and a deeper calling for what you are bringing to the audience. You won't get customers and clients if you don't have a deeper connection to truly helping them accomplish something as a result of your presentation.

2. Entrepreneurs must see the invisible.

Zhena shared a great quote that the manager of her tea estate has made into a sign to motivate the tea workers. It's a lovely example of seeing the invisible: most of the workers don't speak English, but in the future he envisions, they will. "One who can see the invisible can do the impossible."

This quote is meaningful to me both as an entrepreneur and as a speaker. As an entrepreneur, I envision things every day that don't exist. Then I bring them into existence as programs, services and products that serve my clients and customers. I envision the shape, size, and design of my business and then I go about making it so. If you're an entrepreneur, have you seen the invisible?

As a speaker, seeing the invisible can mean many things. Do you envision yourself on a big stage, reaching hundreds or thousands with your message -- but it hasn't happened yet? That's seeing the invisible! Do you imagine a time when you'll feel self-assured and confident in front of any size audience? That's seeing the invisible! Do you fantasize about creating an experience for your audience that's engaging, intriguing, entertaining, inspiring, and also income-producing -- but you don't quite know yet how to make it happen? That's seeing the invisible!

Seeing the invisible means you have a vision and can move forward in the pursuit of that vision. It's an amazing superpower, but when you learn how to harness it, nothing is impossible!

3. Know your worth.

Zhena told a story about a potential investor in her company who was ready and willing to invest some sorely-needed cash. He asked her what she paid herself, and she told him (a very low figure by pretty much any standard), proud of herself for not taking a big salary and investing her profits back into the company. He told her it was "Way too much." You should have seen the audience's jaws drop and heard the audible gasp in the room when she told this story. Courageously, she walked away from the money.

If you don't value your skills, expertise and experience, who else is going to? If you don't believe in yourself and your message, who else is going to?

I have learned over the years that it's not worth it to me to undervalue my services just to get work. If someone doesn't want to pay my fee, I'm willing to negotiate lesser services. But I am not desperate for business, nor do I want to appear to be desperate by accepting low ball offers.

The practical truth here is that it's going to be hard to promote your business or your speech if you don't have a sense of your own self-worth. Your skills, expertise and knowledge are worth more than you think. Own it, value it, charge for it. And above all, give and expect respect in all your business dealings.

There was so much more to Zhena's talk that I can't possibly share here. She told inspiring stories, funny stories, and shocking stories. She came with an authentic and human approach that drew everyone to her, and it was clear that she practices what she preaches:

Encourage and support others.

Believe in yourself.

Build trust.

Add love and heart to everything you do.

Valuable lessons for anyone in business, and valuable lessons for speakers at any level.

Learn more about Zhena's speaking, coaching and other services here.

How gracefully do you recover from a mishap?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 25 Feb 2013 13:06:41 PST

There are a lot of things inexperienced speakers dwell on before a presentation, most of them negative:

What if I lose my place?

What if I forget what I was going to say?

What if I ask a question and no one responds?

Speakers get all worried and nervous and stressed out thinking one of these things might happen, to the detriment of their preparation.

However, we rarely picture ourselves tripping and falling on the way to the stage; even the most Negative Nelly doesn't really think THAT would happen.

But what if it does, like when Jennifer Lawrence fell on her way to accept her Oscar for Best Actress last night?

Was it the end of the world? Will she never get another acting job? Has she lost all respect and admiration?

Of course not.

Will people remember that she fell? For a while. Was she embarrassed? Of course.

But guess what: Life goes on.

She started out with some self-deprecating humor: "You guys are just standing up because you feel bad that I fell, and that's really embarrassing, but thank you," and then went on to give a brief and gracious acceptance speech.

If Jennifer Lawrence can fall in an evening gown in front of millions of television viewers around the world, then get up and go on with her speech, so can you.

Even if "falling down" just means you forgot your place and you had to look at your notes for two seconds.

Audiences are forgiving. They want you to do well. If you mess up, they think "I hate when that happens." Or, "Glad that wasn't me." Or, "Wow, she must be embarrassed but she handled it like a pro."

And then they reset their brains for the rest of your presentation.

All kinds of distracting and embarrassing things happen during presentations every day, and we survive. So will you!

Last summer, I fell down in public. Here's my story:

How have you pushed the boundaries of your presentations?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 22 Feb 2013 13:08:49 PST

Photo Credit: evansrobinson // Armchair Photography via Compfight cc

A common concern of inexperienced speakers (and even sometimes for experienced speakers) is the fear of doing something "different" and standing out from the crowd.

They fear that audience engagement activities will be perceived as "not serious," or presentation slides with images will be perceived as "fluff."

They sit instead of stand at the conference table because "that's just how it's done."

They wear suits when they don't want to wear suits, or neutral tones even though they like bright colors. They give self-introductions of lengthy credentials and thank yous for no good reason except that everyone else does it that way.

And so on...

So here's my question for you:

What have you done successfully -- in your presentations -- that was considered "different" or "unusual" or "outside the box" for your particular company or industry?

Have you done one or some of the above? Have you taken a risk and done something else that generally "isn't done" in your field -- and had great results? Please share in the comments!

I want my readers and clients to see examples of successfully challenging the status quo (stick to the realm of public speaking, please), and the positive results that can be achieved by standing out instead of blending in.

Thanks!

Are you too perfect?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 11:56:47 PST

Photo Credit: Whitening On Wheels via Compfight cc

I know this couple. Let's call them Harrison and Isabella (glamorous enough names for you?).

They're both young, attractive, tall, athletic and well-spoken. They both have successful businesses that continue to grow. They're go-getters who make things happen.

Most of us would look at them and think, "They're so perfect."

And then... "I can't relate to them at all!"

This, of course, is their public persona. I have no idea what their private life is like. And they rarely give a glimpse into their private life -- unless it's a glimpse of their perfect pet or their perfect cocktail at the end of a perfect day.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

I've written before about grabbing your audience with enthusiasm, not perfection. In this case, I was comparing a polished, well-organized and well-rehearsed speaker with one who was a little discombobulated, got off track at times and was a bit disheveled. The difference was the second speaker's excitement and enthusiasm for her topic, which was absolutely contagious! In a moment, I felt connected to her and felt that if I were to choose between the two as coaches, I would choose the second. She was human and real, not putting on a show.

We have the opportunity every day to portray ourselves as bigger and better than life, both onstage and in social media. On Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Google+ -- we have the option of posting only very carefully edited and curated content, so we come across as smart, witty, happy, lucky, successful, fit, healthy, wealthy and popular. Many of us are trying too hard to show the world how fabulous we are. Instead of just being who we are which, let's face it, is not fabulous all the time. And that's okay!

And this is the same for speakers. If you expend so much energy trying to portray the carefully crafted version of yourself that you neglect to show the audience who you really are, you will find yourself exhausted. You will find it harder and harder to keep your facade from cracking, especially once you're off the stage and out in the world. It's a lot of pressure to maintain the facade of perfection. Let go.

I'm not necessarily saying that Harrison and Isabella AREN'T the perfect couple. Maybe everything about them really is as fantastic as they portray. They certainly come across as authentic and sincere.

But what's missing for me is the rest of the picture. Does he ever make a mistake? I wish he would share in one of his presentations his own difficulties in maintaining the practice he teaches about. Has she ever failed at anything? I'd love to know how her failure made her stronger and better at what she does.

This is the kind of speaker most of us can relate to -- we see that they've learned from their mistakes, they're human, and we can learn from them too. Someone who came out of the womb blessed with perfection and who's led a charmed life since day 1: How can I relate to that?

Whether it's a speaking engagement, social media, a networking event... whenever you're with people and presenting your professional persona, remember this: No one expects perfection from you. No one even wants perfection from you. They want to relate and connect. Let them see the cracks, the flaws and the imperfections -- let them see how you've learned from your mistakes or the distance you've traveled to get to where you are today.

Teach by example: Prove to your audience that if you can do it, they can do it!

Can you convey your message without words?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 10:58:45 PST

This spot is only 30 seconds long. There's very little dialog. But you are instantly drawn emotionally into the story (only someone with a heart of stone could look at that little girl's expression and not feel something). The whole thing plays out visually, an entire story, with a beginning, a middle and an end. Take a look:

Speakers speak. And therefore, we use lots of words. But if you want to make an emotional connection with your audience, words cannot stand alone.

If you want your audience to do something as a result of your presentation, you have to persuade them, convince them, move them. This is where emotion comes into play. Words, facts, statistics, charts and data are not enough. Your movement, gestures and facial expression are all key components to filling in the spaces where words can't finish the job.

I have a deep aversion to rehearsed gestures and facial expressions for anyone but actors. As a speaker, you have to be in the moment with your audience, not so rehearsed that those gestures and facial expressions come across as wooden and robotic. So do practice how you want to express the more emotional aspects of your presentation -- the parts of the presentation that will make your audience feel joy, outrage, sadness, confusion, amusement, disgust, surprise, anticipation -- but leave some room for spontaneity when you're in the room with actual people, being real and authentic.

Here's another favorite Subaru ad that you've probably seen. Another 30-second father-daughter spot that expresses a lot of its message through emotion.

These ads have mastered the concept of "Show, don't tell," a mantra for writers and actors that expresses the requirement that audiences experience the story through the characters' actions and emotions rather than through narration and descriptions. You can "tell" the audience your point of view and your opinions and your facts till you're blue in the face. But "showing" them so they experience it emotionally for themselves --that's how you make a lasting impression.

And finally, one of my all-time favorites for a message with no words at all, but incredible emotional impact. Yes, another family-oriented ad. I guess I'm a sucker for them, and I don't even have kids!

Read my analysis of this commercial here.

So let me ask you this: Are you relying on words to convey your message at the expense of emotion?

Love conquers all...

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 08:00:02 PST

In honor of Valentine's Day, I want to talk about love for a moment. Have you heard the expression, "Love conquers all?"You may not know this, but it's part of a line from a poem by the Roman poet Virgil; the complete line is "Love conquers all things; let us too surrender to love." (I didn't know this. I studied Classical Greek in college, not Latin....)

You might also be surprised to know that love is an important part of your presentation. I'm not talking about sappy, mushy, puppy-eyed "love." I'm talking about the way you care for your audience -- wanting what's best for them and showing them your appreciation and gratitude for giving you their time and attention.

Not everything a speaker prepares for a presentation is a physical, tangible item like movement, words, and slides. A lot of speaker preparation is mental, as in positive thinking, visualization and reframing negative attitudes. Add to this mental preparation the concept of gratitude.

First, think about how grateful you are for the people who have come to hear you speak and the people who are organizing your speaking engagement. They're supporting your cause, they're looking forward to learning, they're wishing you success. Be grateful for your audience, because they're here to take in and spread your message. Be grateful, because without an audience, you can't be a speaker.

Then think about how grateful you are for the opportunity to share something you care about with this audience. Think about how fortunate you are to have people sitting and listening to your ideas and your message for 10, 20 or 60 minutes. Think about how lucky you are to help people and give them something relevant and useful that they can use right now to change and improve their work or their life.

Now, dig down and find the thing that makes you care about your topic. What is it that makes you want to do what you do? What is it that makes you want to share what you're sharing? Find that motivation, that emotional connection, that energy for your topic, and bring it out. Then give it to your audience.

When you allow yourself to show love and gratitude to your audience, you can't help but forget about your own woes and distractions. When you allow yourself to be open to creating a human connection with your audience where you give them all your passion and energy and receive it back, you will find your anxiety and nervousness -- if not completely conquered -- at least greatly reduced.

I wrote a blog post a couple of years ago about Michael Jackson, a master performer and visionary for whom L.O.V.E. was a critical aspect of his success. Read it here.

I wish you much love and gratitude this week, both to and from your audiences. And I want to offer you a special Valentine's treat (no-calories) to show my gratitude for you -- but grab it now, because the special offer expires at midnight EST tonight!

5 public speaking lessons from a college president

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 11 Feb 2013 17:22:59 PST

Two weeks ago, I attended a dinner event held by one of my networking organizations. The speaker for the evening was Dr. Lori Gaskin, the new president of Santa Barbara City College.

There's been a lot of turmoil over the past couple of years at SBCC, and our community has been hoping for positive changes in conjunction with the change in leadership, so this was a great opportunity to hear what's been going on at City College -- and hopefully not just a sales pitch.

1. Dr. Gaskin started off the evening by networking her way around the room, introducing herself to the members of the group. Making friends with the audience and building a connection before you speak is such a simple tool for reducing speaking anxiety and getting comfortable with the room, but few speakers (besides politicians) think to do this.

2. To begin her presentation, she started by pairing off audience members and handing out a quiz. This is one of my all-time favorite activities, and again, I rarely see speakers engaging the audience at this level. It helps that she's a former teacher and easily applies teaching concepts to her talk, but it's not that hard for the average speaker to be a little more creative with engagement activities.

3. She gave the quiz up front, but instead of giving the answers all at once, seeded answers throughout the presentation, motivating the audience to retain more focus as we listened and watched to see if we would get the answers correct (and win a prize!). I'll tell you right now that, as a Santa Barbara native, I should have done much better on the quiz! Including the question about how many steps there are in the SBCC stadium. How many times have I told you about my workouts and posted pictures here of those very stairs... that are numbered? Well, I was off by 2. Darn it!

4. Dr. Gaskin not only took an interactive approach with the audience, but also made sure her facts and statistics were meaningful to the audience. Her slides were simple and clean, and unlike speakers who try to tell you everything about everything in a limited amount of time, she focused on the points she thought would actually interest the audience. The level of detail was interesting and appropriate, not overwhelming or mind-numbing. What a concept!

5. She told stories and expressed the achievements of SBCC and its students with authentic passion and enthusiasm. She is clearly inspired by her work, by the college and by our community, which was endearing to a local like me.

I meet fewer and fewer people my age who were born here; it's not easy to stay in Santa Barbara if you want to live here without struggling financially, and especially if you want to own a home. And the people who move here from other cities and states are often not as invested in the culture as the locals (although some are probably more invested -- particularly those who are raising children here).

So I was pleasantly surprised to meet Dr. Gaskin and to hear not only of the amazing successes happening at City College, but also of her rapidly growing affection for the students, faculty and staff, and for the Santa Barbara community.

It was one of the most enjoyable presentations I have attended in a long time. Informative, educational, fun, and inspiring. Not the kind of presentation I see every day, but the kind of presentation I help my clients aspire to!

Welcome to Santa Barbara, Dr. Gaskin!

Maximum message, minimum time

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 06 Feb 2013 12:37:50 PST

The shorter your presentation, the less time you have to persuade your audience. Clients tell me how stressful it is to be invited to speak for 20, 30 or 90 minutes. But I think the most stressful presentation is the 2- or 3-minute presentation!

How do you persuade your audience to take action in two minutes? Can it be done? Yes!

The key is to stick to the most pertinent details, the most critical points that your audience needs, wants and cares about.

A short presentation doesn't allow you to fill the time with any superfluous material, so you have to be razor-sharp.

This chalkboard outside a restaurant in Brooklyn says it all: It's cold out there. It's warm in here. The drawing reinforces the pleasure of the inviting environment inside versus the dreadful climate outside.

What more do you need to know on a blustery winter day?

Here are previous posts about getting your message across in a minumum of time:

What can you convey in three minutes?

How to tell a story in 90 seconds

70 years of history in three minutes

What can you say in 45 seconds?

Time vs. information

Are you answering your audience's #1 question?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 31 Jan 2013 12:35:56 PST

Have you ever been in the audience when a speaker was "preaching to the choir?" You understand and support the cause, so you don't need to be convinced?

Some of us, as speakers, are lucky enough to have audiences like that all the time, but most of us usually have some occasional or frequent persuading to do.

This came to mind during a talk I attended this morning on climate change. I'm a believer, and I'm in favor of the kinds of measures the speaker described that can reduce the damage we humans do to the environment. But I had a problem -- even though I'm a believer and supporter, I still wasn't feeling the personal impact from listening to the speaker.

Even though I saw images of fires, floods, storms and droughts, as well as positive solutions, I still found myself thinking, "What does this mean to ME?"

Of course, the reason I was thinking this was that it's my job to make sure I make my content relevant to my readers' and audiences' lives. And it's my job to teach my clients how to do the same. I look at every presentation the same way.

So while I was listening to this very convincing and persuasive presentation, I also wondered how this topic could be made more personal.

Instead of saying "We want to save the planet for our children and grandchildren" (which is a valid argument), what could the speaker say instead that's not about future generations but about all of us still living on the planet right now?

I can't say I have the answer, as I'm not informed enough about the topic to necessarily know what the personal impacts are besides saving money (which we all enjoy!) by doing things like installing solar and driving hybrid or electric cars.

Anyway, my intention is not to try and fix her speech right here on the blog; after all, it was an effective presentation in lots of ways. What I do want to do is make you, my dear reader, aware of this issue in your own presentations.

Have you thought about how your topic affects the individuals in the room? Right now?

If so, congratulations! You're way ahead of most speakers. Now that you've thought about it, how are you implementing it?

This is related to the "So What?" factor, by the way. Your audience is constantly asking "So what?" as in: "What does this mean to me?" They're asking. Are you answering?

If you've thought through how the individuals in your audience are impacted by your topic, and you've implemented ways to demonstrate, illustrate and make that crystal clear to your audience, your presentations will have much greater effect.

Sure, there are lots of people who want to save the planet because they believe it's the right thing to do, whether or not they experience a particular personal outcome besides feeling good about their contribution.

But for most of us, this and other high-stakes issues we constantly see in the media tend to combine together into a vague, nebulous "problem" that someone needs to solve. But it's too complicated and too vast for one person to make a difference (or so we believe).

And when we don't see how we're affected and we don't see what we as individuals can do to make changes, things don't change. Your audiences don't act. And isn't there always something we want our audiences to do as a result of our presentations? Absolutely!

How are you showing your audiences the personal impact of your topic on their lives? How are you showing them the personal impact of their action or inaction?

What can Hans & Franz teach you about confidence?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 25 Jan 2013 07:54:00 PST

I have a question for you: What is confidence?

We all know that audiences are drawn to a speaker who shows confidence. We all know that we need to have confidence as speakers. But what is this magical thing called confidence, and where does it come from?

Think about the confident people you know. They get respect. They get listened to. They're persuasive, so they get their way more often!

In fact, confident people inspire confidence in others! Wouldn't you love to be that person - radiating confidence and inspiring it in others?

Watch below for my impression of Hans & Franz, and a few words about my new program "SpeakUP! 8 Daily Challenges to Build Your Confidence Muscles at Work, at Home, and in Front of an Audience."

P.S. There's a launch special with bonuses and special pricing that expires at midnight 1/26, so check it out ASAP!

Stop trying to be a hero

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 24 Jan 2013 10:39:24 PST

Photo Credit: JD Hancock via Compfight cc

Yesterday I was working with a client who will be speaking at a memorial service for his recently-deceased father. It will be a grand celebration of life, attended by many friends, family and local dignitaries.

His speech is fairly short, and in preparing to practice, I asked him if his intention was to memorize it, or if he was planning to use notes.

He indicated that he was not interested in trying to memorize the speech: "I'm not trying to be a hero."

Isn't this exactly what trips up so many speakers?

Trying to impress, trying to appear flawless, trying to look and sound like someone else....

Refusing to use notes, refusing to use a microphone, refusing to get help....

Our audience does not expect perfection or superhuman feats.

I don't know how many times I have to say it or how many times a speaker has to see it with her own eyes, but this is not what the audience cares about.

If the audience is engaged with you, intrigued by your message and taken out of their own world for a few minutes, does it really matter if you're using notes? Does it really matter if you stumble over a word or lose your place for a second?

Stop trying to be a hero and start trying to connect. Be real. Be you. Give the audience your love and gratitude.

That's what's impressive.

Read a book -- you'll be a better speaker

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 16 Jan 2013 10:16:30 PST

Have you ever heard the expression, "It's a doggy dog world?"

Have you ever heard someone say, "For all intensive purposes?"

How about "Nip it in the butt" or "A mute point" or "Take it for granite?"

There are plenty of egregiously misquoted expressions in writing, but I'm specifically referring to spoken words here, the kinds of things you hear people say out loud and that cause you to cringe at their ignorance.

I'm not being a language snob here. There's a correct way to say all of those phrases, and if you're misquoting them onstage, your audience will cringe as well.

I understand the reason these expressions are misquoted is that the person saying them has never seen them written out. "Dog-eat-dog" world sounds like "Doggy dog world" (although it makes no sense in context) if you've never seen it in writing.

These kooky sayings have been passed on through word of mouth and, more recently, through Facebook, Twitter, blogs, and other editor-free Wild West frontiers of the Web.

How do you remedy this? How do you ensure that your grammar, pronunciation, and expression of the English language don't end up causing you embarrassment? (Nonnative English speakers: I don't expect this from you. Only from people who have been born and raised in the United States and should know better.)

Read.

I don't care what you read. Read cookbooks. Read novels. Read magazines. Read newspapers.

Click photo to expand. Thanks for this pic, rocket ship!

The Internet doesn't count, by the way. The Web is full of poorly edited content that perpetuates the unfortunate repetition of expressions like "Wah-lah!" instead of "Voila!"

Preferably read something in print, published by a legitimate publisher who pays copy editors to make sure the English language is not butchered.

When you read, you will see these words and expressions spelled out instead of guessing at what the words might be when you hear them.

Okay, I am a language snob. I admit it. But that doesn't mean I'm wrong, or that if enough people say "doggy dog world" it's miraculously going to become correct.

Do you want your audience to find you credible, knowledgeable and authoritative? Then you better make sure your spoken grammar, pronunciation and understanding of the English language are up to par.

Are there some misquoted sayings that drive you crazy? Feel free to share in the comments!

I just wanna pump -- you up!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 15 Jan 2013 08:30:01 PST

Do you remember Hans and Franz? The former Saturday Night Live muscle men who said in thick Austrian accents that they just wanted "to pump you up?" (Classic sketch at the end of this post.)

You probably don't want giant muscles like Hans and Franz had (especially giant fake muscles), but how about those confidence muscles? Could they use some pumping up?

Join me for my free teleseminar on Thursday, January 17: "6 Tips for Growing and Showing Confidence Both On and Off the Stage (Even if You Have None!)"

Some things I'm going to talk about include:

>> How to bring out your best by ignoring your worst

>> An easy acting technique that can make all the difference in a room full of strangers.

>> Doing things that scare you in order to actually boost your confidence

>> Making the audience the center of attention to take the the pressure off of you

>> Using a simple trick to make your body control your brain

>> One thing speakers feel compelled to do that will ALWAYS show your lack of confidence

Want to look and feel more self-assured on stage, in meetings, at work and with strangers? Build your confidence muscles!

Now, here's a little vintage SNL fun:

Six bowling balls

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 11 Jan 2013 14:51:37 PST

In the documentary, "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead," Joe Cross is on a mission. He's on a mission to lose weight, regain his health, and build a community of healthy-eating partners across the U.S.

The story doesn't really pick up for me until he meets Phil Staples, a morbidly obese trucker who realizes he is on his way to an early grave if he doesn't change his sedentary and junk-food-eating ways.

Phil takes on Joe's challenge, starts a 60-day juice fast (the central theme of the movie is losing weight by juicing), and starts exercising.

Phil becomes so transformed emotionally and physically, he starts giving talks and sharing his story.

He's a sweet and engaging man, but what really demonstrates his ongoing success is when he lines up six bowling balls and tells the audience that's how much weight he's lost so far.

Six bowling balls.

I didn't even have to do the math to figure out how much six bowling balls weigh -- it varies, of course.

All I had to imagine was wearing those six bowling balls on my body. Walking with them. Sitting, sleeping, climbing stairs.

What a visual! What an amazingly concrete illustration of the pounds and heaviness that Phil had lost.

Phil had already told a great story before that, but the bowling balls gave his words real meaning for anyone in the audience wondering what it feels like to be as large as Phil.

How can you give your words more meaning with demonstrations, visuals and props?

How many gurus are you listening to?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 09 Jan 2013 11:53:27 PST

Photo by Sam Segar

This is going to be TMI, but stick with me because I do have a point, and it will be relevant to public speaking.

I recently started a new diet protocol for dealing with IBS -- irritable bowel syndrome. I've had it for many years, it comes and goes, gets worse and gets better, and I've tried a lot of solutions, but none were quite right.

I recently learned about a protocol developed in Australia to reduce FODMAPs in the diet: FODMAPs stands for "fermentable oligo- di- and monosaccharides and polyols." Here's a brief and easy-to-understand description from R.D. Patsy Catsos' website:

"FODMAPS carbohydrates include certain natural sugars in foods such as milk, fruit, honey and high-fructose corn syrup. FODMAPS also include certain types of fiber in foods such as wheat, onions, garlic, and beans. (No, FODMAPS has nothing to do with gluten -- it's just a coincidence they are both in wheat).

All FODMAPS carbs have a few things in common:

* They are sometimes poorly absorbed in the small intestine. As the hours go by after a meal, these carbs move along into the large intestine.

* They are the favorite foods of the bacteria that live in the large intestine. When bacteria eat FODMAPS, a lot of gas is produced. (Sometimes people have "inappropriate" bacteria in their small intestines that can ferment carbohydrates, too.)

* FODMAPS can act like a sponge to draw and hold excess fluid in the large intestine."

I don't want to get into gross detail, but I think you get the picture. There are these carbs and sugars in many fruits, vegetables, dairy, grains and beans that wreak havoc in the gut. This made a lot of sense to me, because a lot of the foods mentioned in her book are foods I've had trouble with. I just never knew they fit into certain categories and that I could control my intake of these categories in a somewhat scientific manner.

I bought Patsy's book, because she gives a very explicit and thorough explanation of the process, and instructions about how to approach the testing and reintroduction of high FODMAP foods.

I found a Facebook group where people were sharing their experiences with this approach and joined in.

What else did I find? A lot of confusion. Whereas I was very happy using my one book by one dietitian, many of the people in the group were using a hodgepodge of resources: handouts from their doctor or dietitian (with no additional guidance, unfortunately -- this approach is not yet well-known in the US or UK, so a lot of doctors and dietitians are flying by the seat of their pants), a variety of websites and blogs, a couple different books from experienced dietitians, and a smartphone app that was just released by Monash University, the central research facility for this program.

The problem is that there are varying "rules" for things like which foods are allowed and in what quantities. Different dietitians give different advice based on their interpretation of the research and their own research with their patients. One says broccoli is not allowed at all. Another says broccoli is allowed in a 1/4 cup serving. And so on.

Add this together with the fact that each of us tolerates different amounts of different foods. So one person can easily tolerate a half cup of broccoli, while another person can't tolerate any at all.

Many of the group members were feeling overwhelmed and confused. Was I? No. Because I have one "guru" and I'm using her guidelines exclusively. I know exactly what I'm doing and adjusting my food intake according to my reactions.

What does this have to do with you? Let me ask you this: How many gurus are you following?

Mind you, I hate the word "guru" when used self-importantly by people in their Twitter and Facebook profiles. I'm attempting to be tongue-in-cheek here for lack of a better word to describe this kind of expert.

Do you subscribe to six different Internet marketing newsletters? Do you sign up for trainings and programs from five different social media experts? Do you read twenty public speaking blogs?

How's that working out for you?

I've been there. I still subscribe to more newsletters than I know what to do with and sign up for far too many free teleseminars that don't really teach me what I want to know. But I'm getting better.

I've started narrowing down my gurus. In 2012 I made a large investment in my business by signing up for group coaching with an online business expert I've been following for five years and whose paid programs I tried for the first time last year. I like her approach, I like her systems and I like her personality. We're a good fit. I finally decided to cut down on the "noise" and pick one guru to listen to.

This has made it so much easier when tempting teleseminars and programs come through my inbox. I'm still following one or two other gurus who offer sound business advice in a different format or focusing on different topics, but I'm no longer scattered, confused and paralyzed by indecision about which path I should take.

It's no different with public speaking experts and coaches. You will get different advice from every source you follow. We each have different approaches, different styles and personalities, and different philosophies.

Are you going to keep following twenty gurus or are you going to settle down and pick the one that you most resonate and identify with and who fits your approach to life and business?

I'll be honest: I hope you pick me. But whatever you do, just pick someone. Or even two. Or even three. But not twenty.

Pick one and then make a commitment. Sign up for their courses, buy their books, really dig into what they have to offer. You will learn so much more by exploring the offerings of one or two people. Once you get past two or three main sources, you're not learning, you're collecting. You're gathering scraps and tips, not deepening your knowledge and implementing solid content.

It's a new year. Time to pare down. Time to reduce "infobesity" (awesome word I heard yesterday on one of those free webinars). How will you narrow down your gurus? Please share in the comments!

How is public speaking coaching like going to the dentist?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 02 Jan 2013 10:19:36 PST

Believe me, I know how resistant many of you are to seeking out public speaking coaching. By hiring a coach, you are acknowledging two things:

1. Your skills or confidence are lacking and you need help.

2. By working on your speaking, you are committing to doing more of it.

This is not easy, and I get it. In fact, a friend of mine compared hiring a speaking coach to going to the dentist.

Here's my take, below:

I hope this is the year that you take the bull by the horns and face your resistance and your fears. Help is here!

I have a home study course if you like to work alone; I have a live group course option if you like accountability and group support; I have private individual coaching intensives if you want to get that dang presentation out of the way NOW.

And this month, I'm launching a new version of my previous 12 Speaking Challenges for 2012 program, an 8-week confidence-building program that I'll tell you more about later.

Are you making excuses about why you can't get help? Are you in denial that you need help? Or are you ready to say "Sayonara" to everything that's holding you back and finally get serious about becoming an engaging and memorable speaker?

Get in touch and we'll figure out the best solution for you. Yes, in many ways, hiring a speaking coach is like going to the dentist. And the results are worth it.

Getting it together with discipline and systems

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 27 Dec 2012 14:55:23 PST

I was lying in bed the other night thinking, "I'm so weak. I'm so lazy. I have great ideas but never follow through." And so on. Like most of us, I can be pretty mean to myself at times. But then I stopped and realized that none of those things are true all the time. Sometimes they're true. But my real problem is discipline.

I know what I need to do. And sometimes I even do it. But it's SO easy to let things go. Exercise. Project ideas. Healthy eating. Drinking water. Networking for my business. These are all things that I've blown off at one time or another for no good reason except I "didn't want to."

I ask you: Is that the way to get things done?

The word "discipline" struck me like a bolt of lightning that night lying in bed. And coincidentally, I've been noticing a lot of signs pointing me toward creating better systems, which can only help me be more disciplined. Whether it's opening a separate bank account just for rent, or creating a launch calendar for a new program or product, I've found that systems are the best way for me to accomplish my goals.

In 2011, I kicked off my first one-word theme year with the word ACT. And it forced me to do things I might not have done had I kept thinking about doing things instead of doing things. It's a more focused approach than writing resolutions, and I can apply it to all aspects of my life.

I thought I had a theme word for 2012, but I see no sign of it anywhere, so if I had one, I quickly forgot about it.

Onward to 2013, and keeping up my new tradition, my one-word theme is DISCIPLINE. And as a sub-theme, SYSTEMS.

How about you? What one-word theme resonates with you? Is there a word that encompasses your goals and desires for 2013?

Is your speech spammy?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 21 Dec 2012 17:43:28 PST

Today I was scrolling through Facebook, you know, for work... and came across a story that didn't quite seem believable to me. Yet several people I know had shared and commented on it. I Googled the subject of the story, and sure enough, part of the story was true, but the part that people were upset about was a complete fabrication.

You've seen these kinds of stories. They start out seeming credible and possible, but somewhere along the line, details get embellished and become more dramatic and farfetched, and pretty soon everyone is up in arms, reposting and calling for someone's head on a platter.

Posts like these clog my news feed every day, and are an utter waste of space. Yet it never occurs to those who post them to take a few seconds to Google the topic or visit Snopes.com to verify the story before they spam the rest of us with this junk.

This, of course, made me think of presentations that are embellished with dramatic stories, quotes and statistics that have never been verified but are repeated endlessly by speaker after speaker. Here are two that make me crazy.

Think of this unsubstantiated information as spam. It takes up space in your presentation where valuable content could be. It wastes your audience's time when they could be learning something true and relevant to their lives.

Furthermore, if you are misleading your audience, you are not just doing them a disservice, you are deceiving them - even manipulating them - to get the result you want. Is that how you want to influence people? Is that how you want to get your results? Maybe you know your audience is gullible enough to believe you, or maybe you're truly misinformed yourself. That doesn't excuse passing along unresearched material as fact.

What happens when they find out the truth?

1. At best, you look misinformed and lose some credibility and trust.
2. You look out of touch with reality.
3. You look like an outright idiot.
4. At worst, you look like a liar.

After the Facebook post I mentioned above, I was treated to another example of (to say the least) misleading information being used as a metaphor for personal growth. It's not a bad metaphor and people can identify with the pain and suffering described in the story, but it's completely false! Below, the short video I'm referring to. And here's the link that debunks the story.

Please take the time to make sure your material is solid, honest, truthful, verified and not manipulative. Nobody likes spam, but people especially dislike being led down a path that turns out to be a route to nowhere.

Dealing with a distressed audience

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 18 Dec 2012 08:30:03 PST

Sometimes we have to give a presentation under less than optimal circumstances. I'm not talking about those times when you're having a bad day or haven't gotten enough sleep, although those are also less than optimal and we've all experienced it! On those occasions, we keep our discomfort to ourselves and suck it up.

I'm talking about those times when your audience is in distress or distracted because of something that's happened (or is going to happen) at their workplace, in the community, or in the world.

Sometimes it's a happy and exciting event, like when the space shuttle flew overhead at the exact time I was supposed to begin a workshop with a recent group. Everyone wanted to be outside for this historic occasion, the last nationwide tour of the space shuttle on the back of a 747. Unfortunately, the timing was off, and people spent the first 15 minutes of our training time going back and forth to see if it was coming. Distracting but manageable.

Last week, there was a different kind of incident, a school shooting that took many lives, a national tragedy.

I still had to give my training. People still had to attend my training. What could I do in the face of such an event, when I knew people were upset, angry, shocked and saddened (as was I)? Watch my short video below for how I chose to deal with it.

This was an appropriate exercise and time frame for the group and for our proximity and connection to the event. However, if there had been something happening within the organization where my audience was directly affected, like layoffs or cutbacks, or a major distressing incident, I would have taken a little more time and talked a little more about what was happening, and my focusing exercise might have been a little more involved.

The important thing is to acknowledge that something is happening. Let your audience know that you're in the loop, you're not out of touch, and you understand their mental state - to some degree. Give them the opportunity to clear out the current distraction and be present and in the moment with you. Your presentation will go much more smoothly and they'll learn and retain more if you've dealt with the so-called "elephant in the room."

Are you substituting learning for action?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 14 Dec 2012 08:30:01 PST

I was on a social media teleseminar recently, delivered by George Kao, and he asked a profound question: "Are you substituting learning for action?"

This took me back to December 2010, when I decided my one-word theme for 2011 was going to be "ACT." After I chose this word, I came across several signs telling me that I had picked the right word, including this quote:

"Contemplation often makes life miserable. We should act more and think less. Take action and you can achieve ANYTHING."

And in 2010, I really did consciously make the effort to act more and think less. But then I got lazy again, like many of us do.

Does this concept resonate with you? Are you -- like me -- someone who is constantly taking classes and webinars, subscribing to a million newsletters for all the free tips, reading blogs, and packing your brain full of knowledge... but never putting it into action?

Sometimes we don't value the learning that we get for free as much as we value the learning we pay for. This is just one reason we don't follow through with next steps. And sometimes we don't know how to take the next step, because the reading and watching is only one piece of the puzzle.

Public speaking training and education, like other kinds of training you might take, is only as useful as the action you take to implement it. I know a lot of you enjoy reading this blog, reading my newsletter, downloading my free handouts and watching my tips videos. And you're learning a lot, there's no doubt, because it's important to me that my content is valuable, even if it's free.

But are you taking the next step? Are you acting on what you're learning? Are you standing in front of audiences and doing the things you've read about, like showing gratitude or using audience engagement techniques or grounding yourself?

Because I don't want you to be wasting your time. Or your audience's time, for that matter. If you're reading and learning, but not doing, then what's the point? You're not growing as a speaker, and your audience is not fully engaged with you.

I'm in the process of planning out 2013 for my business. I've got products and programs to launch, a mailing list to grow, speaking engagements to prepare for, and new opportunities (that I can't tell you about yet) to develop. I'm mapping it out, making a schedule, putting tasks and appointments on the calendar. I'm rethinking what I've done in the past and changing things up where necessary.

Something I've been working on for a few months is reorganizing my programs and coaching. You can see on this page some of my new offerings, like my home study program, "Speak to Engage: 7-Step Shortcut to Public Speaking Success," and my new coaching formats, including my SpeakNOW Presentation Transformation Coaching Intensives.

Something else I did this year was invest in my business. I joined a 9-month mentoring program that cost me a lot of money. The most money I've ever spent on my business, in fact. But it's worth it, because the guidance and support I'm receiving is helping me put into action ideas I've only imagined. I also signed up for a program to grow my skills in video. Because I want to stop talking about making videos and resenting the preparation involved, and just DO them.

What are you doing to plan out your speaking growth for next year? Do you want to build your business through speaking? Do you want to get more visibility and credibility for your work? Do you want to be seen as an authority? Do you want to stop avoiding speaking and start enjoying it?

Now let me ask you this: Do you have speaking engagements on your calendar?

Are you investing in your speaking growth and planning for how to implement what you're learning?

If not, why not? Don't wait for opportunities to come to you. Make them.

Stop substituting learning for action. Start doing.

2013 is going to be a big year. Can you feel it? What are your plans for growing as a speaker next year? Share in the comments!

Our kitties and the Christmas tree...

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 13 Dec 2012 10:33:30 PST

How did our kitties take to the Christmas tree? Watch the video and find out!

December 12for12 Challenge: Put it all together

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 04 Jan 2013 11:28:16 PST

All 12for12 posts have been removed, as they are now part of my "SpeakUP! 8 Daily Challenges to Build Your Confidence Muscles at Work, at Home, and in Front of an Audience" online program, which will be launching mid-January 2013..

For more information on "SpeakUP," click here.

A simple stats illustration tool that's not a chart or diagram

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 05 Dec 2012 14:46:49 PST

How's this for a simple illustration - human bodies? So much more interesting than charts and graphs (although they do include a simple pie chart in the video as well). Can you make your message this clear and concise? Gotta give a hand to these students for their creativity!

Are some presentations less important than others?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 30 Nov 2012 10:08:49 PST

Are some presentations less (or more) important than others?

You might think that your two-minute introduction of a speaker at an event is less critical than your one-hour training presentation on your topic at a conference.

But you never know what impact you might have on an audience. Or even on one audience member.

Your goals for speaking might include the following:

1. Educate or train your audience
2. Getting visibility for your business
3. Building credibility as an expert
4. Making sales for your company
5. Persuading community members to volunteer for or donate to your organization
6. Persuading someone to meet with you for further conversation
7. Build a network
8. Improve your skills
9. Build confidence on stage

And many more -- we each have our own reasons for making and accepting speaking engagements.

Whether you speak for two minutes or for two hours, your goals should always be foremost in your mind.

What are you trying to achieve?

What is your objective?

What can you learn from the experience?

How can you achieve the goals you've set for yourself, in this particular environment and with this particular audience?

If your goals for speaking include any of the above, I invite you watch the video below to learn about my "Speak to Engage: 7-Step Shortcut to Public Speaking Success" home study program, which I am releasing to my online community today!

Every presentation is an opportunity to start fresh

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 28 Nov 2012 09:52:49 PST

How many of you avoid speaking? And how many of you avoid speaking because of something that happened in the past that you perceive as negative?

A lot of you have built up fears about speaking based on imaginary worst-case scenarios. Here's a blog post for you.

Today's post is for those of you who have actually had a bad experience, and you're basing your avoidance of speaking on the fear that the one bad thing that happened to you will happen again.

But here's the deal: Every presentation is a blank slate. Every presentation is a free-standing event. It's a new day, a new audience, a new venue, a new take on your topic.

If everything about the situation is different, why would the same thing happen again?

And if you know that there's a possibility that the same thing could happen again, wouldn't you then be able to prepare for it?

And even if you prepared for it and it did happen again, couldn't you handle it better this time, because you've anticipated it and know how to conquer it?

I love this article by Seth Godin about waiting for the fear to subside. He says:

"By the time the fear subsides, it will be too late. By the time you're not afraid of what you were planning to start/say/do, someone else will have already done it, it will already be said or it will be irrelevant. The reason you're afraid is that there's leverage here, something might happen. Which is exactly the signal you're looking for."

And,

"The fear can be your compass, it can set you on the right path and actually improve the quality of what you do.

Listen to your fear but don't obey it."

There's a little more, but that's pretty much the whole blog post.

Look at each presentation as an opportunity to start fresh. Whatever happened in the past is in the past. You can't change it, but you can have new experiences in the future.

Don't let the past have so much power over you that you avoid moving forward, sharing your message, and growing as a confident, skilled, successful speaker.

If you don't want the relationship, don't ask for the favor: Part 2

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 21 Nov 2012 17:00:03 PST

I decided to add a Part 2 to my post If you don't want the relationship, don't ask for the favor after a recent experience where I gave a group of people a compilation of resources that they requested, and not a single person responded, even to let me know they had received it.

In the previous article, I talked about getting to know a person and building a relationship with them before asking for favors. In this post, I want to talk about follow-up and why, if you're an entrepreneur or professional, it's critical to do it.

Here's a common scenario. You meet someone at a networking event, online, at a conference, or at a speaking engagement. In the course of your conversation, you discover that they have important resources that will help you in your business, and they are happy to offer them to you.

You give your contact information, and in a timely manner, the person replies with the helpful resources you asked for (there is an assumption that you receive the e-mail and it doesn't get lost in cyberspace). Now, you have three options:

1. As soon as you open the e-mail and see what's inside, you click "reply" and send a quick thank you note.

2. You read the e-mail, get distracted by either the resources or other things, and when you come back to it weeks later, you finally remember to send a note.

3. You read the e-mail and never respond.

Honestly, I don't know how you could ever make the choice to do #3 if you're a person in business, and here's why:

You have just shown this person that their time and effort mean nothing to you.

You have shown them that their help and assistance are unimportant to you.

And you've just demonstrated that, if they ever contact you again, you are unlikely to respond.

You have just shown them that you are not a person whose services they should engage.

Public speaking and business are both about building relationships, with your prospects, your clients and your audiences. Showing someone you don't care about them, especially when they've helped and supported you, will backfire and hurt you in the long run. You don't have to send an elaborate engraved thank you note, but a brief acknowledgement that the item has indeed been received is the minimum someone should expect from you, a professional.

Ignoring one e-mail is not going to derail your business, of course. But if this is how you treat everyone, your inconsiderate behavior will derail your business, or at least prevent it from flourishing.

Here are some solutions you might want to implement, if you want to be considered a responsible and responsive person worth doing business with:

1. When giving a colleague your contact information, use an e-mail address you actually check regularly.

Don't give out your old Yahoo or Hotmail address if you haven't looked at it in months. Don't give the address you use to sign up for newsletters and sweepstakes. Give a valid and active business (or personal, if that's what you're using) address, and then check it daily.

2. Check your spam folder regularly.

Occasionally, legitimate e-mail will go to your spam folder. Don't assume everything in that folder is junk. I can't tell you how many times I've followed up with people who "never got my e-mail." When I ask if they've checked their spam folder, they reply back, "Oh, it was in my spam." Check it!

3. Follow up yourself if you don't hear from the person who's supposed to contact you.

If I say I'm going to send you something, I will. I do. So if you don't hear from me in a timely manner, say, a couple of days, let me know. Because if I sent you something and you didn't receive it, then there might be an e-mail problem on my end or yours, and this would be good to know. I will resend you the information from a different e-mail address to see if you've received it (and I have both e-mail addresses listed on my website, so I can always be reached at one or the other).

If you want to compete in the business world, you have to be reachable and responsive. Period.

What other solutions do you have to help those people who never reply to your e-mails (besides writing them off as flakes and never doing business with them)? Please share in the comments!

Quick tips on using a microphone

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 16 Nov 2012 10:16:28 PST

Happy Friday! Here are some quick tips on using a microphone. Enjoy!

(You'll have to crank up the sound on both your computer and YouTube; it recorded at a very low volume.)

Turning the negative into positive

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 14 Nov 2012 08:33:13 PST

I recently caught an episode of Oprah's Lifeclass, not something I would typically watch, but I know a lot of people who are fans, so I recorded it. The guest on her show was Pastor Joel Osteen, and I particularly enjoyed this exchange between them about changing negative thoughts into positive thoughts.

Osteen: "We all have that recording playing in our minds. Simple things, 'I am confident.' 'I am secure.' 'I am talented.' 'I am creative.' 'I am disciplined.' 'I am focused.' Simple things.

Oprah, I really believe some women have never said once, 'I am beautiful.' Because they're looking at all their flaws. They're looking at... 'Hey, I don't look like her, I don't look like them...' but listen ladies. When you say 'I am beautiful,' you know what you're doing? You're inviting beauty to come in. You're inviting coolness and freshness, vitality."

Oprah: "You know what? As you're saying that, I'm thinking, 'I've never said I'm beautiful. I say, I'm okay.' Let's all say that, ladies. 'I am beautiful.' Invite it in."

Osteen: "It's not magic, but those words go out of our mouth and they come right back into our own ears. They start to change our own self-image. This is not magic, but you go around saying all day, 'I'm blessed, I'm beautiful, I'm talented, I'm valuable, I'm creative, I'm disciplined...' that's doing something on the inside of you. It's affecting your own self-image."

"It may come to your mind, but don't give your words life by speaking them out. Don't ever say anything negative about yourself. You may feel it, but just zip it up and make those positive declarations."

This is something I am constantly working on with my clients. And I would go a step further than just "Don't ever say anything negative about yourself." I would say, "When you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts about yourself, stop it, then reframe it." This is called "thought stopping."

Here are some examples of negative thoughts, and the positive reframe:

Negative: "Who would listen to me?"
Positive: "I have a lot of valuable information to share. The audience is going to love it."

Negative: "I’m going to lose my place, forget my words, etc."
Positive: "I'm well-prepared and I'm not going to mess up. But if I do, so what? I'll make a joke and move on."

Negative: "The audience is going to disagree with/challenge me."
Positive: "I already know the areas where the audience might disagree, I've anticipated their questions and concerns, and I'm prepared to address these issues."

Negative: "I'm boring and can't keep the audience's attention."
Positive: "I've planned plenty of interaction and audience engagement activities to keep their attention. If I lose them briefly, I can get them back."

You have to decide what are the right words for your situation, but I highly recommend taking the time to actively reframe your negative thoughts about yourself, your presentation and your audience.

Break the habit of negative thinking. See yourself as accomplished, confident and ready to perform. When you believe in yourself, the audience will believe in you, too!

Want to build confidence muscles? Listen to my interview!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 13 Nov 2012 15:40:22 PST

Don't miss my interview on Thursday with Debbi Dickinson of The Professional Woman's Virtual Summit. This summit is featuring sixteen fabulous women, with a wide ranges of messages about balancing work, love and play in your life!

If you...

Want to learn top strategies for work/life balance
Want to effectively minimize stress in your life
Want tips on how to excel in your career
Are ready to set goals to reach your dreams...

... then this telesummit is for you!

My interview is on building your confidence muscles and getting out of your comfort zone. We talked about a lot of different things and I offered a bunch of great tips (plus, there's a free gift at the end...)

Sign up (for FREE) for the remaining days of the summit and listen to my interview on Thursday, November 15! The calls are usually held at 8:00 pm EST/5 pm PST.