Speak Schmeak

You can save the day

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 22 Mar 2026 11:35:00 -0700

In 2020, with three days' notice, I filled in for a speaker who was unable to shift to virtual in the first week of lockdown.

In 2023, I filled in—with zero notice—for a speaker who didn't show up at all. I was sitting in the room waiting for their presentation with the rest of the audience. The room was full, I had already presented once at the conference, so I volunteered to do the session. 🤷🏻

Next month, I'll be filling in for a speaker who had to change their session date at the last minute (three weeks is last-minute in the speaking world!).

Are you always ready to present? Or say a few impromptu words if asked?

If your boss or a colleague reached out and said "So-and-so can't make it tomorrow; can you fill in?" would you be able to say yes? 🤔

You can always be prepared to speak. And perhaps you should be!

Think about the next event you're attending. Is it a graduation, retirement dinner, birthday, wedding or other celebratory occasion? Are you close to the guest of honor in some way?

Don't be caught off guard if the host asks you to make some remarks!

It doesn't have to be more complicated than, "I've enjoyed my six years working with Jackie. She always brought the best snacks, and I wish her all the best in her future adventures."

Always assuming you'll be asked to speak will serve you better than hoping you're never asked to speak. Write a few words in your phone or on a piece of paper in your pocket. Ready!

I'm a professional speaker, so people assume I enjoy impromptu speaking—which I don't.

But I could spend five minutes talking about a paperclip or my mom's meatloaf if someone requested it. And I'm always ready to help out by filling in.

Think about it:

You could save the day!

You could be the go-to person everyone thinks of in a pinch.

You could be building your spontaneity muscles and providing critical support when needed.

"But I'm not good at thinking on my feet!"

Most people who seem impressive at thinking on their feet have spent a lot of time "thinking at their seat" as TJ Walker puts it.

Keep learning and writing about, reflecting on, and otherwise engaging with your topics of expertise. Note what questions people ask and anticipate new questions, objections and misconceptions.

You may have three weeks, three days, or three minutes to prepare mentally. But you CAN be ready. You can even save the day. 🦸🏻⚡

(Pics: March 2020, speaking for National Speakers Association - Michigan on three days notice. Shifted my existing workshop on webinars into my Go Virtual training with practical tools for remote live presenting! And April 2023 filling in at Associations West with a spontaneous session also on virtual presenting. Do I talk with my hands? YES.)

Be the opposite of AI

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 4 Mar 2025 12:30:00 -0800

Be the opposite of AI.

Have you seen these promos?

"No more spending hours designing slides; create visually stunning presentations with AI in just seconds!"

🙄

👉🏼 If you care about accuracy and facts...

👉🏼 If you care about authenticity and human connection...

👉🏼 If you care about being known for your own thought leadership and unique perspective...

Please be the opposite of AI.

Natalia Sanyal wrote this as one of her two top marketing trends for humanity-first businesses in 2024: "With AI-generated content taking over our feeds, humanity-first businesses seemed more motivated than ever to show their audience that their content is human-generated and anything but generic."

Creating an effective presentation requires more than just feeding some text into an AI app. And your presentation is more than just slides.

Before you can make slides, you need content. How do you create content for your presentations?

By figuring out who your audience is and what they need, want and care about so you can solve their problems using your expertise and experience.

AI is absolutely helpful in brainstorming, organizing, and even structuring a presentation.

But you still need to personalize it with your own voice and your own ideas. You need to create engagement and collaboration with the participants to help them learn and apply what you're teaching.

Otherwise, you just end up saying and doing what everyone else is already saying and doing. And sure, if you don't care about being generic, have at it.

Jar of rocks? Starfish story? I asked ChatGPT for additional examples of overused presentation stories and it added the boiling frog story and the bamboo tree story, along with "Einstein’s Definition of Insanity," which Einstein never even said. Which somehow doesn't keep generic presenters from using it over and over.

And then, of course, you have to deliver these ideas physically, in a room or on a screen. AI certainly can't do that for you. It's up to you to bring the human touch, the emotional connection, the humor, and your one-of-a-kind point of view.

AI is a great tool. I LOVE it. I use it all the time to help me cut short some of the brainstorming time with my presentations. And it can definitely help me round out some of my ideas, clarify and condense some of the things I want to say.

But it's no substitute for my own thought leadership, lived experience, personal examples, stories and experiments.

If you want to create a relevant, practical, useful, engaging presentation that is meaningful and memorable for your audience, AI is not gonna cut it.

And any presentation you create "in seconds" with AI is probably gonna be junk. Like these images I made to try to illustrate this post.

This is how you give a bad conference presentation

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 25 Feb 2025 12:21:00 -0800

👎🏼 Winging it

👎🏼 No visuals or images

👎🏼 No audience interaction

👎🏼 Bullet points in tiny tiny text

👎🏼 Reading straight from your notes

👎🏼 Reading your notes word for word

👎🏼 Not telling stories or using examples

👎🏼 No vocal variety or physical movement

👎🏼 Sharing content that's not relevant to your attendees

👎🏼 Sharing content that's not practical or useful to your participants

👎🏼 Straight lecture with no questions for or collaboration with the audience

👎🏼 Copying and pasting AI content without revising to sound like it came from you

👎🏼 Looking down at your paper instead of making eye contact with the audience

👎🏼 Forgetting that humor is a form of emotional engagement that attendees welcome

👎🏼 Focusing entirely on data and statistics at the expense of emotional engagement

👎🏼 Saying exactly what's on your slides that the audience can already read with their own eyes

👎🏼 Not researching your audience in advance so your presentation is canned and not tailored

👎🏼 Slides that are patchworked together from other presentations with multiple sizes and styles of fonts and colors

👎🏼 Going over your time because you didn't prepare properly (and now they're late for lunch or their pee break)

What did I miss?

Speaking at conferences is an excellent way to get known and respected for your expertise in your field.

But it's not enough to just be smart, and you can't just recite information and expect your participants to absorb it.

If you want them to walk away and DO something with the information you're giving them, you'll need to do more than just stand in the front of the room and read from a paper.

🔮 Planning your conference presentations for 2025?

🌟🌟 Presenters: Hit me up for one-on-one coaching and let's get that presentation conference-ready.

🌟🌟 MeetingPlanners: I can help prepare your speakers. Let's talk!

Information + inspiration + persuasion lead to action

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 18 Feb 2025 12:04:00 -0800

Inspiration and persuasion require emotional engagement, so why do presenters think they can bombard their audiences with information alone and expect that to lead to action and results?

Throwing statistics, data and hypotheticals at people at the expense of reaching them "in the feels" will not motivate them to take the action you desire.

So, what actions do you want your participants to take at the end of your presentation?

🌀 donate

🌀 volunteer

🌀 attend events

🌀 make a major gift

🌀 engage in research

🌀 join fundraising efforts

🌀 become mentors/mentees

🌀 share stories about working with you

🌀 refer others to your organization

🌀 contribute to scholarships

🌀 follow on social media

🌀 join your membership

🌀 amplify your message

🌀 join your mailing list

🌀 sponsor programs

🌀 share resources

🌀 advocate

🌀 partner

🌀 vote

These are examples from my nonprofit training clients, depending on the context and the audience they're speaking to.

Information, inspiration, and persuasion are all necessary pieces of the puzzle.

🧩 People need information, but just *specific* information to help them make a decision. Not ALLLL the information. Just the information that is specific to their particular needs and concerns, and is clear, concise, and relevant.

🧩 They also need inspiration to help them see how actual humans are affected positively by the action you want them to take (or animals or oceans or trees ↬↬↬ and then connect it back to humans). They need inspiration to help them feel connected to your cause and to WANT to help.

🧩 And they need persuasion in order to move past the inspiration and feelings, to take the concrete action step(s) you're requesting.

And regarding action: You actually need👏🏼a👏🏼call👏🏼to👏🏼action. You need to tell them what you want them to do next.

And it's not "go to our website." 🤦🏻‍♀️

🎯 Give them the exact action they need to take to do the next thing.

🎯 Give them a specific link to donate - and tell them exactly what their donation might cover.

🎯 Give them a specific link or phone number to volunteer with specific opportunities, descriptions and time commitments.

🎯 Give them a specific link or phone number to reach out to their congressperson *with a script* so they know what to say or write.

🎯 Give them a specific date, place and time to show up for the thing you want them to do, and tell them exactly what's required.

Information + inspiration + persuasion: You need all three if you want people to do something and do it NOW.

Need support to put the puzzle pieces together in your next presentation? Contact me!

Nonprofit messaging in 2025: Where do we go from here?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 11 Feb 2025 12:03:00 -0800

Sharing some soundbites and rough thoughts about making nonprofit messaging more clear, relevant and practical, from CalNonprofits annual policy conference.

"'Democracy is at risk.' What does that even mean?" State Senator Anna Caballero

"Misinformation is free; digging into policy is behind a paywall." Jodi Hicks, Planned Parenthood Affiliates of California

"Don't obey in advance." Anand Giridharadas, journalist and author

The conference was sobering and exhilarating at the same time.

I attended in order to gather intel on how upcoming policy changes will affect my nonprofit training clients, and what support they might need in the next year to continue #SpeakingUpForChange.

How might Californians be affected by the new administration and how will the nonprofit sector adjust and take action?

I wasn't surprised to hear the following takeaways regarding both messaging of candidates and of nonprofits in helping their communities understand the election process and outcomes (from my perspective as a communication professional):

🔴We need better messaging that meets people where they are (climate change impacts everything from insurance rates to energy bills - people don't know this)

🟣We need to speak their language (not give high-level policy reports or make existential claims like "save democracy")

🟡We need to actually ask people what it means for them personally

⚫There is huge disconnect between policy and people's actual lived experience

🔵People do have an appetite to be better informed: We need to make accurate information more accessible - not hide it behind paywalls

🟠We need to teach people how elections work, to help combat apathy and overwhelm, and get voters out for midterms and off-year elections (remember Schoolhouse Rock?) Check out America the Possible, a new site that promotes civic engagement and understanding how our country works "one simple, tiny MicroByte at a time."

🟤Communities need to invest in nonprofit and local media because people don't trust national outlets

🟢Nonprofits and media need to show people doing good work in their communities to illuminate a pathway for those who don't know what to do and how to help

⚪Organizations need to improve their communications overall - talk to their communities in a way that they can hear, learn and retain

🔴Collaboration and communication are essential to fill in gaps of information and services

Where do we go from here? Now that the problems have been acknowledged, will we take action?

Several of my nonprofit clients use "ambassadors," volunteers who are the clients of the organization, for community outreach and legislative advocacy. More need to be doing this!

P.S. The quote "punk rock time" is from Henry Rollins. "This is not a time to be dismayed, this is punk rock time. This is what Joe Strummer trained you for." ~ Henry Rollins

Pirate energy

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 11 Nov 2024 13:14:00 -0800

Rachel Maddow gave an impassioned speech after the election last week. This is what I needed to hear and what many of use need to hear, internalize and act on. Let's go, pirate energy!

"If you are an American citizen who does not want to ash can the American system of government, who doesn't want a strongman, authoritarian system where the whole government is one guy and everything else just exists to serve him—if that is not the kind of country that you want—then yesterday's election means you have more to do for your country than you have ever done before.

Because now is when the rubber really hits the road, right? We don’t just flip a switch, and the American system of government is gone. Democracy is gone. It doesn’t work like that. I mean, not to be boring here for a second, but just getting very real.

We are now just another one in the list of countries that has decided to, you know, hey, what the heck, let’s try the strongman thing. Let’s let democracy go. Let’s put in an all-powerful guy instead and see how it goes. There are many more countries in the world governed by that kind of a system than there are governed by ours.

We are the only 248-year-old, multiracial, pluralistic democracy in the world. And shall we keep it? A lot of our fellow Americans say we shouldn’t. Now we know. Now we know for sure. But a lot of Americans, tens of millions of Americans, say we should keep that system—which means it’s time to fight for it.

And yes, Americans did fight for it by working on this election, by trying to get the candidate elected who was both the Democrat and the small-d democrat. She didn’t win. The strongman candidate won instead. But now history doesn’t end. Time doesn’t stop. Now, we have the benefit of knowing, you know, how this has gone in every other country that has been through a democracy-to-authoritarian transition. And sadly, there are a lot of them. We have the benefit of seeing what’s happened in those other countries though. And what we know is that the more ground the authoritarian takes, the harder it is to ever get that ground back.

And so the first order of business is to stop them from taking any uncontested ground, right from the outset when it comes to what our system of government is and what our democracy is, right? We know from other countries' experiences that, quickly—I mean, now, in the next few weeks, if not the next few days—they are going to start pushing to see how far the country is going to let them go without pushback, without protest. And part of this is because it’s just psychologically advantageous for them to do this now, right?

They’re counting on the half of the country that voted against them, the half of the country that doesn’t want to give up our system of government. They’re counting on all those tens of millions of Americans to be despondent, to feel powerless, to check out—which, of course, would mean letting them do what they want, letting them run the table.

What they really don’t want is for the half of the country that voted against them, the half of the country that wants to keep our democracy. What they really don’t want is for those tens of millions of Americans to wake up tomorrow feeling scrappy as hell.

Feeling sure, regretful about the election outcome, but also, frankly, freed up from having to spend all of our time working on the election. So now we can work full time on being frickin’ pirates, on being a thorn in the side of anyone who now intends to try to turn this country into some tin-pot tyranny. What they want least of all is to realize that half the country went to bed sad tonight but then woke up tomorrow fired up with a new sense of purpose, knowing that apparently this is what we’re on this earth to do as American citizens in this generation.

Because history did not just end. Time did not just stop. We just got marching orders from the universe and the Electoral College that, as of today, American citizens who do want to hold on to democracy, we know exactly what we’re going to be spending the next days and weeks, and likely years, of our lives working on.

And the strategic first moves come into focus quickly when you think about what other countries have shown us about how hard it is to regain democratic ground once an authoritarian leader has taken that ground. And the work has to be done now. The work that has to be done now—it has to happen in sort of every aspect, every corner of our society.

The U.S. military needs to give the American people binding assurances that they will not deploy U.S. military force against the civilian population in this country. They can give those assurances, and now they should.

The free press needs to give the people of this country assurances that they will not become state TV, that they will stand and fight together. They will put aside rivalries and petty professional differences. They will stand and fight together as the free press, as the fourth estate, as an institution that is a pillar of our democracy as these guys on the other side inevitably start picking off individual journalists, individual publishers, individual news organizations to try ultimately to turn us all into some American-accented version of RT.

If the Democratic Party takes the House, expect Article I of the Constitution to come under attack—by which I mean, expect efforts to hollow out the power of Congress, to make Congress a just-for-show institution, right? There’s a reason actions of the Russian Duma never make news, right?

Expect efforts to attack Article I, to make it a just-for-show institution that has had its real powers taken over by the executive, by the dear leader. We are going to need a plan and some steel spine inserts among elected officials in Washington to head that off. We’re going to need the whole country to recognize that risk in advance, to call it what it is when they try it, and to actively resist it.

Depending on whether the courts can provide a check on this administration, expect Article III of the Constitution to come under attack as well. It is already a fetish and a laugh line on the right to brag about how court orders really mean nothing and physical force and violence is what ultimately really decides what’s allowed. Well, we have to decide if that laugh line from them is going to become our reality or whether we’re going to resist that.

We need a plan and some steel spine inserts among members of the judiciary to head that off. We’re going to need the whole country to recognize that risk in advance. We’re going to need every lawyer in the country to recognize it as their calling to fight it. We’re going to need to call it what it is when it inevitably happens. And we’re going to have to actively resist it.

And then there’s civil society. Is there a more boring term in the world that doesn’t include the word "committee" or "budget"? No, there isn’t. Civil society, though, is kind of where the rest of us are at, right? Civil society is one of the things that I think of as soft food for authoritarians. They often don’t even have to bite that hard to crush it. All the organizations, membership groups, advocacy groups, professional associations, every voluntary group of every kind in the country, everything in organized American life and culture that is not business and not the government either—that is civil society.

And authoritarians need to crush that because it’s not about them. Strongman leaders have a tendency to become not just leaders of the government, not just dictators, but totalitarians because they can’t have anything going on in the country that isn’t about them or for them. And a strong civil society, therefore, must be crushed, right? If you have a strong civil society, that gives people breathing room to think for themselves, to organize in their own interest, to speak with the power of more than just one person.

We need assurances from civil society leaders today that they’re not going anywhere and that they will fight for our democracy too.

And frankly, it’s not just the leaders. We all need to participate in more civil society things than we have before to make sure that we are taking up space that otherwise they’re going to try to take for the government and the dear leader. And what I mean by this in short is: join something. It doesn’t really matter what it is. But you want right now to be connected to other Americans and not isolated on your own.

So, deep breaths, hydrate, maybe time to get back in shape. Do you have any burned bridges in your past? Un-burn them. Reconnect with people, whether it’s your family or the people on your block or in your town, your old friends from school, that book club, that Indivisible group maybe. Reconnect or connect for the first time.

Join something, join something.

If this election was about one candidate who stood for the American form of government and another who stood for getting rid of that because America is a garbage can and "I alone can fix it, just give me all the power, and I’ll do it all." If that was the choice in this election, then the aftermath of the American people making the choice they did in this election is not just the end, right? It’s not just, oh, it’s over. It means we’re now entering into a contest.

It will now be an effort on his side to put that into practice, right? To put strongman, authoritarian government into practice. And it will be an effort on the other side, an ongoing, continuing, and now newly urgent effort on the other side to let him know that it’s not going to be easy.

These next few days and weeks, if they really are going to try to dismantle the American form of government, including firing all federal employees, right, including rounding up their enemies, including opening internment camps to hold millions of people, threatening military force against their perceived enemies—if they really are going to try to undermine the American system of government, which is what they’ve made this campaign about, then in the next days and weeks, they are going to be testing to see what they can get away with without pushback.

They are going to do the things they can do easily, and they will have to put off the things that turn out to be hard. So, what’s going to be hard for them? That’s where the American people come in. We do not only work for our country and for our democracy in elections; we work for our country and for our democracy against anyone, anywhere, anytime who seeks to do it harm. And so there’s, there’s a lot to do.

Time doesn’t stop. History doesn’t stop. We have stuff to do. Millions of Americans woke up today to the realization that, although you worked as hard as you could to try to bring about the election outcome you wanted, you did not get the election outcome you wanted. And so now what that means is that there is a whole new raft of stuff to do.

Hope you are feeling scrappy. Hope you are tapping into your inner pirate energy because it is one thing to be a defender of the realm. It is another thing to be in opposition. And opposition can be a lot of things. It can be dangerous. It can also be fun. It would have been nice to win the election. Didn’t. OK. Time to save the country."

Watch the video here:

Psst! You're a windbag!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 8 Jan 2024 10:10:00 -0800

Hey you! You're a windbag. 😮‍💨

🌬️🌬️🌬️

Sure, you're an esteemed expert and authority in your field.

You're sought out for the value you bring to conferences.

You have knowlege and experience that's not easy to find in a speaker.

But...

🟢 You looooove to hear yourself talk.

🟣 Your ratio of lecture to engagement is wayyyy off.

🟡 You're so verbose that your audience can't even breathe.

🔵 Your language is anything but plain, and way over their heads.

You've been doing this so long, that you've forgotten the most basic concepts about giving a presentation:

🟣You can't expect bored attendees to learn or retain your material.

🟠You can't just pour information into people like they're empty vessels.

🟢You have to tailor your content so it's relevant, practical and useful to them.

🔴You have to balance what you need and want with what they need and want.

Some of my "windiest" and driest clients have been academics, CEOs, healthcare professionals, financial advisors, and lawyers, who realized that the piece missing from their presentations was engagement.

✅They know their stuff.

✅They're highly experienced.

✅They're not nervous about speaking.

But they're missing that critical element that creates a complete experience for their audiences—and by the way, the element that creates a more fun experience for themselves!

Are you missing the audience engagement piece? Reach out and let's talk!

If you're not nervous, your presentation might suffer

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 14 Sep 2023 09:54:00 -0700

If you're not nervous, your presentation might suffer.

It doesn't mean you have to be shaking in your boots to give a good performance (because that's not good for anyone), and it doesn't mean that you can't experience incredible energy and a sense of flow and connection during the performance.

What it means is that, in order to do a good job, we have to *care.* We have to be committed to delivering our best AND delivering what the audience needs, wants, and cares about. And there is ALWAYS uncertainty when you're getting in front of a group for the first time.

I'm giving my first significant keynote in December. Yes, I'm nervous! That doesn't mean I don't have 100% confidence in my ability to deliver an amazing experience. It just means that I care!

Top speakers, athletes, and entertainers will always be nervous before an event because they're committed to excellence, and they don't rest on their laurels of previous successes.

Here's a snippet of a conversation between Eddie Murphy and Jerry Seinfeld, from Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee:

Eddie: "The times I've gotten on stage and felt totally loose with no energy of being uncomfortable at all, I would do shitty. I wouldn't have as strong a set."

Jerry responds.

Eddie: You gotta have a little bit of "What if this shit doesn't... what if they don't get all of this shit?" I always do best when I have a little bit of that.

And here's a conversation between Conan O'Brien and Chris Farley, after Chris Farley took a pratfall in his character of motivational speaker Matt Foley:

Conan: "The falling down helps, right? Always gets a laugh."

Chris: "Yeah, it breaks the ice a little bit...."

Chris: "....It's like a first hit in football. It takes the butterflies away. 'Cause I was backstage like, going, 'Oh God—they're gonna know I'm dumb!' So I just fall down, try to do something physical."

Some people are so petrified that they avoid public speaking at all costs. Some get a little stage fright right before beginning their presentations, and it goes away quickly.

And a manageable amount of nervousness is beneficial to a speaker. For one thing, it's a signal to your body that you're in a heightened state of awareness. (I'll be talking more about this in my new course, FYI!)

Nervousness is a part of public speaking like crashes are part of the Tour de France. The best way to deal with nervousness is not to try to eradicate it, but to learn to manage it as a tool and use it to your advantage.

🧪🦠🧠Want to learn more about the biology, chemistry and psychology behind public speaking nerves, and also learn how to manage your nervousness, channel the adrenaline, and work on your mindset around the adrenaline rush?

I've got a new course coming out JUST on public speaking nerves and stage fright. Comment below or message me to get the link when I make it available for pre-order at a special rate.

(Pic: Here I am feeling super relaxed AFTER speaking on a panel.)

Make a fool of yourself

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 21 Aug 2023 10:24:00 -0700

When we were in LA recently, I made my husband drive around the block into an alley with this blue wall, and then take about a hundred pictures of me so I could make graphics like this one. 📸

Do I feel foolish doing these poses in public while people walk and drive by?

Maybe a little. 🤷🏻

My husband is very patient with my requests; he knows that any time we go somewhere together, I might ask him to stop in a weird place and take some weird pictures.

But taking silly pictures and videos in public is probably the LEAST embarrassing thing I do on a regular basis.

I make a fool of myself practically every time I give a presentation. And every time I learn from it.

I learn what works, what doesn't work, how to recover from mishaps, and how to engage my audience more effectively.

I put myself out there because that's how I grow as a person and as a presenter.

Every time I enter a microfiction contest, I risk embarrassing myself with a story that readers don't get, or that doesn't place, even though I thought it was good.

Or maybe I didn't think it was good, but entered it anyway because it was the best I could do given the prompts and the 24-hour constraints.

Some thoughts on a Sunday: Stop worrying about embarrassing yourself. Just get out there, make mistakes, look foolish. Get out of your comfort zone, push past the discomfort and create learning experiences for yourself!

P.S. Also, if you have a chubby gut and a double chin, take the picture anyway.

What have you done lately to look foolish on purpose? Share your thoughts below! 👇🏼

Sometimes you're not meant to be part of the conversation

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 14 Aug 2023 10:29:00 -0700

I was once reading a conversation started by a Black person about anti-Black hate crimes, and I thought it would be helpful to mention antisemitism and the hate crimes that Jews experience.

Why did I think that would be helpful? 🤷🏻

Maybe I thought Black people needed to know that Jews are also victims of violence? (Nope, they already know that.)

Maybe I thought I was offering solidarity? (I wasn't. I was making it about myself.)

Maybe I thought the conversation needed "different perspectives?" (It didn't. It was a conversation meant to educate and bring awareness about people's lived experiences, not to ask for different opinions.)

This was a huge learning experience for me, realizing that sometimes it's not actually about ME. Sometimes my opinion or perspective is not needed or relevant. 🤯

As a communication junkie and natural-born opinionated bigmouth, I have spent my life inserting myself into conversations that were not meant for me. I tend to think my opinion is incredibly valuable and worthwhile and that everyone should hear it. 📢

Now, if I want to create awareness of antisemitism, I can make my own post. I can share my own resources. I don't need to hijack someone else's post about their lived experience and try to insert my own, when it's not relevant.

I'm unlearning some things. Just because people are talking publicly about something on social media doesn't mean they want to hear "my side of the story."

Sometimes a topic is open for discussion and different perspectives.

Sometimes there's only ONE SIDE and we need to just shut up and listen. 👂🏼

To clarify:

Men: learn from the experiences of women.

White women: learn from the experiences of Black women and WOC.

White people: learn from the experiences of Black people and POC.

Straight people: learn from the experiences of LGBTQ+ people.

Cisgender people: learn from the experiences of trans and nonbinary people.

Non-disabled people: learn from the experiences of people with disabilities.

Etc.

Most of us have multiple identities, so listen to the ones you are not a part of!

Do your slides advance and enhance your message?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 7 Aug 2023 10:36:00 -0700

Me: Introduces the Van Gogh of slides.
Audience: So, about those quarterly reports.

When you're using slides, you have to balance visual engagement and relevant information. ⚖️

A slide that's beautiful but doesn't advance your message is just as pointless as a slide with 12 bullets and a title that says, "Why Bother? No Choice Soon = Science (testing) Advances, Media 'Instant Messaging' Globally, Risk Management, Sustainability No Longer Altruistic." (Yes, a real slide from a conference I attended.) 😕

I'm a huge fan of slides, and I use them in most of my presentations.

However, I don't use bullets or more than two lines of text. Rather, I focus on one simple idea per slide, illustrated with a relevant image (sometimes humorous, and always something that enhances the point I'm making).

There is no opportunity for the participants to:

🔸read ahead and plan their arguments or disagreements

🔸read ahead and start Googling the point

🔸get distracted by something at the bottom of the slide they don't understand

🔸not follow what I'm saying because they're so busy reading

🔸strain their eyes trying to read miniscule text

I love slides, and at the same time, I only love them when they're relevant, practical and useful to the participants - and enhance and advance the message I'm trying to convey.

Do your slides advance and enhance your message? Or are they actually a hindrance to your message?

P.S. How do you like my meme? 😆

Are your identities "real?"

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Mon, 31 Jul 2023 10:35:00 -0700

Are you a "real" writer? A "real" artist? A "real" speaker?🤔

I've published a nonfiction book, a microfiction story, and I write practically every day, as well as competing in writing challenges. I even wrote a children's book that I've never published.

Why does it feel weird to call myself a writer?

Do you have the same barrier?🧱

We watched the movie "A Little White Lie," and this bit of dialogue hurt:

"Teresa: I'm excited for the students to meet, like, a real writer.

Shriver: Well, aren't there plenty of real writers here? T., Simone?

Teresa: It's like the only place you can find their books is in the college bookstore in the local author section."

Ouch.🤕

You can't find my book in brick and mortar bookstores. It's on Amazon and some other online sites, and I have a couple boxes in my office for events and clients. But it's not a best seller or known by more than probably a thousand people.

Even though I write every day, how many people see it? Not many, in the grand scheme of things.

So can I call myself a writer? If I'm not famous? If I don't make a living at it?

Well, yes. Yes I can.

Because I decide what my identities are. I'm a "real" writer.📝

An electrician has to go through training and then an apprenticeship, gain thousands of hours of experience, then take an exam and get an certificate before they can even apply for a license.

Of course, writing, speaking and making art aren't as dangerous as electrical work, and I would like to know an electrician won't kill me or himself working in my house.⚡🔌

But if there isn't some external "proof" of your identities, how can you know what to call yourself?

My husband paints; his art is all over our house. Has he sold any? No. Does he have formal training? No. Is he an artist? He hesitates to own that identity, but yes, he is.

I used to market my programs and coaching to "speakers," but I realized that so many of the business presenters I work with—who speak as part of their jobs or as a way to gain visibility and credibility—don't identify as "real" speakers.

So they didn't see themselves in my marketing!💡

Now I call them something they can identify with: "business presenters" or "people who speak for their organization." That one's a little awkward. 🤷🏻

How about you? Are you uncomfortable identifying yourself a certain way because you don't feel "real?"

How would it feel to say "I'm a speaker," "I'm a writer," "I'm an artist," "I'm an athlete," or "Insert yours here?"🎉

P.S. Also, transgender and nonbinary people have real identities, whether you believe in them or not.

👇🏼Share your thoughts below!

You get the courage after you do it

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 21 Jun 2023 19:52:00 -0700

You're not going to build public speaking confidence before you do it. That's not the way it works.

You have to actually do the presentations, build the skills, get the experience, survive and learn from your mistakes. That's how you build your confidence.

And every time you you mess up and you don't die, you put that in your back pocket and you pull it out the next time you need a little bit of courage to get in front of an audience or to do something risky.

Unfortunately, it's pretty hard to build courage or confidence if you're not doing the thing you're scared shitless of.

[Thanks to "Three Kings" for this excellent piece of dialogue.

Archie Gates : The way it works is, you do the thing you're scared shitless of, and you get the courage AFTER you do it, not before you do it.

Conrad Vig : That's a dumbass way to work. It should be the other way around.

Archie Gates : I know. That's the way it works.]

Time, flow, engagement: Top three presentation challenges

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 21 Jun 2023 12:56:00 -0700

You're a business leader in the cutthroat corporate world, and presentations are one of your battlegrounds.

You may or may not love giving presentations, but they're a critical part of getting your message in front of the people who need to hear it.

So what's getting in the way of you delivering your most compelling, concise and powerful message? There are probably more, but let's just focus on these three...

1. No time

You're busier than ever, juggling countless tasks and projects, and barely coming up for air. So when it comes to prepping your next presentation, let's just say you wing it.

You rush through the process, your ideas are all over the place, and the final result falls flat.

Deadlines, meetings, and daily chaos leave little space for dedicated preparation, so your presentations never get the time priority they deserve.

2. No flow

Ever sat through a presentation that made you go, "Wait, what just happened?" We've all been there.

Lack of a clear and logical structure that actually leads your audience to a desired result is one of the biggest issues I see. Especially when your main presentation prep involves opening a PowerPoint and typing in a bunch of bullets... (yes, I'm looking at you).

Without a clear navigational flow, the audience is left scratching their heads, missing out your core points. It's like trying to follow a treasure map without any landmarks - a confusing journey that goes in circles.

3. No engagement

Effective presentations - the ones that actually get results - are all about engaging and connecting with your audience on a human level, but honestly, this is one of the biggest struggles for business presenters.

You fill your presentations with jargon-filled monologues, acronyms, charts, graphs and data that leave your participants nodding off. Too much information crammed into too little time can turn a potentially amazing presentation into a snoozefest.

When you spend so much of your time trying to impress your attendees, you don't connect, they don't relate, and you've just wasted a bunch of your - and their - time. Engagement is required to move people into action.

How to get on top of these three issues without spending a ton of time or money?

Brace yourselves, my friend: the Presentation Prep Reset Package is here to get you EXCITED about your next presentation in a compact format that is easy and fast!

With its step-by-step guidance and 12 powerful prompts, you can kiss chaos goodbye and say hello to presentations that flow and connect.

The Presentation Prep Reset Package puts the spotlight on clarity, simplicity, and audience-centered design. It facilitates making the most of your time and creating presentations that actually make an impact.

Tackle your time troubles, messy structure, and engagement issues with this easy and quick workbook, video guide and written transcript (for those who hate taking the time to watch videos, like me!).

Check it out here: https://coachlisab.com/prep

Is "fake it till you make it" bad advice?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 14 Jun 2023 11:10:00 -0700

Do you hate the expression "fake it till you make it?"

To me, the issue isn't so much with the idea of "faking it" as it is with "making it."

Honestly, I fake it all the time. When I attend an event where I'm nervous and don't know anyone, and would rather be at home with my laptop and cats, you can bet I'm faking confidence when I first walk in.

I kind of play a character, but the character is ME: the most confident, outgoing version of me. And the beauty of it is, as I warm up and meet people, the character goes away, and the confident, outgoing version of me remains.

It's one thing to pretend you know things you don't know, pretend to be someone you're not, to overrepresent your skills or credentials, to make up things that can be proven false. That's not what I'm advocating.

There's a structured way to fake it, a tool used in psychotherapy called "act as if." It's a tool of narrow focus specifically on behavioral change; that is, you're not meant to "act as if" you're a medical doctor if you're not.

But it's used as a way to rehearse behaviors that you want to change, but that seem daunting.

For me, "acting as if" at a networking event looks like walking up to people and putting out my hand to introduce myself, even though it feels awkward and scary.

(See photo of me "acting as if" at a table with strangers 😱👇🏼 the night before a conference. Linda Harvell and Kindra Fry were sitting together and saw me eating alone. Before long, they brought three more "orphans" into the fold, and we became besties!)

"Acting as if" in public speaking might mean making eye contact or smiling, even if it feels awkward and scary.

So faking it, to me, is a natural part of learning, rehearsing and absorbing new and uncomfortable behaviors so we can eventually do them more naturally.

I do get stuck on the concept of "make it." Because this end result sounds vague. What does it even mean? Will I ever NOT be nervous in a room full of strangers? Unlikely. Making it implies an end point, where there might never be one.

I prefer "fake it till you find it." I wish I could say I made this up, but I poked around and it already exists. Darn it.😆

It’s already within you to be more confident, to feel more comfortable in your own skin, to take risks of putting yourself out there more and being seen and heard.

But finding it is not the end result. When you find it, then you can cultivate it. You can keep growing and improving and building on what's already there.

What do you think? Keep "fake it till you make it?" Change it to "fake it till you find it?" Something else?👇🏼

Visibility can be awkward; do it anyway

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 23 May 2023 23:12:00 -0700

You hate bringing attention to yourself. Taking selfie pics and videos makes you want to hurl. I get it.

But if you're an entrepreneur, you need to be seen and heard. And those images and videos of you working, playing, and living your life help people get to know you.

When you go to someone's social media or their website and all you see are stock photos, aren't you a little bit put off? We want to know who's behind the curtain! 🫣

Here are my thoughts on how to make selfies less awkward (keep in mind, it takes a LOT to embarrass me, and even *I* feel weird walking around town shooting videos of myself 😳).

📷 Ask your partner to take pics and videos when you're out and about

It's always less awkward when someone does it for you! My husband knows that when we leave the house, he'll be called into duty as my documentarian.

He knows that documenting my life and work is just part of being visible, and he does it unenthusiastically. 😂 Sometimes I get a laugh out of him if I'm being particularly weird.

📹 Make a date with a fellow entrepreneur

Plan a lunch, a walk on the beach, some wine tasting or a coffee date and make a deal that you'll document each other.

It's still having someone else do it, but this way, you both benefit from the photo shoot. Just film yourselves having fun! (There are also now "selfie museums" that are made just for these kinds of photo shoots.) It's also a good excuse for the ones where you actually do your hair and dress up a little.

🛠️ Have the right tools

And by tools, I mean phone and tripod. I have a Pocket Tripod by Geometrical Inc. that sits in my wallet, slightly thicker than a credit card. I pull it out, assemble it, and voila! Always ready for a selfie.

😵‍💫 Realize that people aren't paying attention to you

The truth is, most people won't even notice or care about what you're doing. Sitting on a park bench taking a selfie? Who really cares?

Everywhere you go, people are filming themselves, their friends, their views, their food, their pets... it's a *thing.*

When you're out and about, put your phone in your hand. Be ready when the inspiration strikes. Cool wall? Take a pic in front of it! Trees and greenery? Great backdrop. Funny sign? Perfect spot to pose.

Build a library of selfies and videos (aka "b-roll") so you always have something to add to your website and your socials, especially for those times when you just don't feel up to a pic.

🛑 Oh, and that thing people say, "Selfie for the algo..."? You don't need to explain yourself for posting pictures on social media. Pics get more engagement than anything else you can post. So stop explaining or apologizing and just do it!

How do you build your selfie library? Share below!

A unexpected presentation in living color

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 23 May 2023 23:02:00 -0700

Here I am looking "unprofessional." And giving a presentation. 🤯

Even *I*, with my "live and let live" attitude about what constitutes professionalism, never dress like this to present. I just haven't found a fun, colorful, comfortable outfit that works for me, so I default back to my routine gray, black, white.

Once I'm done speaking, though, I'm back in my bright, colorful clothes.

So on the second day of the conference, when the speaker didn't show up for their breakout, I jumped in and ended up doing an impromptu session on remote/virtual presentations...

...wearing THIS outfit! A wacky patterned skirt, magenta sneakers, two chunky plastic cuff bracelets, my longest earrings, bright, bold, loud, and 100% me.

Did I do a great job? I think I did. 🤷🏻

Did I overthink what I was wearing before I stood up? No time.

Did anyone care what I was dressed like while they were receiving value and resources? Pretty sure that's a no (but we'll see if they write me into the evaluation, which still has the booked speaker's name for that session)!

🪄Once again, I find myself teaching what I most need to learn. And I need to go shopping, because the days of the black and gray uniform are over.

Are you still stuck in a rut with your presentation outfits? Tell me more!

DMV Part 2: Empathy goes a long way

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 14 Mar 2023 10:13:00 -0700

I needed to get a question answered by the DMV and was dreading the phone call, predicting that the person would be curt, “by the book,” or just unhelpful.

I was SO mistaken.

The lovely man I spoke to didn't have an easy answer for me, so he went off the line to speak to his supervisor. He came back and they had discussed and come to a conclusion that was thoughtful, understanding and reasonable.

And then we chatted for a bit about my volunteer work at the Twice-Sold Tales library bookstore in Ojai (where I was when I took the callback) and how people don’t seem to read books as much as they used to. He asked if there was just one, and I laughed. We're a tiny town with three tiny libraries and one tiny used bookstore that supports them all. I invited him to come visit if he's ever in Ojai!

Once again I was caught off guard by my own perceptions of what to expect from the DMV (see part 1 here).

And I was reminded just how far a little empathy can go when having potentially uncomfortable conversations, especially when you know the person is anxious or apprehensive about speaking to you.

I can lack empathy at times. I can be pretty judgy. So these little reminders are so helpful for me!

Don't forget to apply empathy during your presentations. Putting yourself in your attendees' shoes, when discussing a difficult topic will make a huge difference in how they retain and apply your message!

Are you anticipating perceptions?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 21 Dec 2022 10:01:00 -0800

My experience at the DMV yesterday was very different from the "olden days."

Even though my transaction was a bit complicated and I had several several wait times in between staff interactions, it was miles away from what I used to experience.

The greeter/expediter was super helpful and got me off on the right foot.

The people were delightful, many wearing Christmas hats (it was Christmas hat day, to be followed by Christmas sweaters and whatnot).

One of them shared her fascination with an Orthodox Jewish woman's IG account that I'm now following!

I had lovely conversations with everyone I encountered, and the fact that I was able to make an appointment online and fill out some paperwork using a simple touchscreen made it even smoother.

But what's the PERCEPTION of the DMV? Surly employees, long wait times, and a generally miserable experience.

When you give a presentation (whether it's at a formal meeting or via your Instagram reels), are you 👉🏼👉🏼anticipating perceptions?👈🏼👈🏼

I often teach about anticipating objections as a presenter: being prepared for the things that people will disagree with or challenge you on.

But anticipating perception is different: It means being prepared to address general perceptions of you, your work or your organization - and to correct them!

One organization I met with recently said "Everyone thinks we only work with homeless people. But we have all these other services!"

An employee of a library I'm working with said, "People automatically equate libraries to reading/education/school, which they have a negative opinion of."

❓❓How are perceptions of you, your work and your organization keeping potential clients away, or keeping people from seeking your services?

Whether you're posting on socials or speaking at a conference, always be prepared to address perceptions:

🔸"You may have heard XYZ..."

🔸"You might be surprised to know XYZ..."

🔸"If you've always thought XYZ, let me blow your mind..."

If people are stuck on old perceptions of you (or holding onto objections in their 🧠), they're not fully open to what you have to say. They've already made up their minds about you.

🌟🌟What perceptions do people have about your work or your company that you need to dispel so you can serve all the people you're meant to serve?

☎️📧Reach out if you need help with this in your presentations!

Monitor the chat... or don't use it

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sat, 5 Nov 2022 16:49:00 -0700

I was in a workshop on cybersecurity while attendees flooded the chat with links to random "cybersecurity" products.

Oh, the irony.🙄

It was literally impossible to determine if any of these links were safe (I certainly was not going to click one to find out), and yet, the hosts of the workshop were not paying any attention...

👇🏼

…even as they were explaining safety measures for our businesses, including avoiding malware.

On top of that, there were SO MANY comments and questions in the chat, it was difficult to identify and reply to the legitimate posts.😵‍💫

So I gave up and hoped for a recording.

🙏🏼🙏🏽🙏🏾Peeps, if you're hosting a remote training on Zoom, please have someone monitor your chat. You don't have to spend money on a professional producer; a friend or colleague who's familiar with Zoom will be fine.

If you can't, and especially if you expect a lot of attendees, then ❌DON'T❌ USE❌CHAT.

Set up your training as a webinar instead of a meeting and use the Q&A feature instead.

It's frustrating and off-putting for your audience to be spammed during your presentation and for you to do nothing about it!

Don't wait for things to happen. Make things happen.

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 2 Oct 2022 11:45:00 -0700

I read a post recently that said "It makes me sad that nobody invites me on podcasts, I have so much value to offer."

Sometimes it feels like you're at the world's mercy. Like everyone is invited to the party except you. 😭

But you do have control over at least one thing: your own actions.

When I'm not getting speaking inquiries or my previous clients don't need me at the moment, I have actions I can always take.

1️⃣ I make offers. I tell people what I do and invite them to find out more. This can be in the form of social media marketing where I post links and calls to action, or it can be in the form of reaching out to people who've inquired in the past and letting them know that I have a program that might be a good fit for them.

2️⃣ I research and apply for speaking engagements. There are a LOT of conferences and podcasts out there and most of them have some sort of application process. You can Google ""speaker rfp" or "speaker request for proposals" and find many many options. You can also Google "podcast guest application." (My Speaker Proposal Hacks Pack can help once you find the ones you want to apply for!)

3️⃣ I create my own programs and products. You don't have to develop a whole podcast or a whole conference. Record videos or audio sharing value and expertise and put them out to the world for free, or create your own products that people can buy.

My business is a mix of corporate training, conference speaking, 1:1 coaching and self-paced DIY programs. I never put all my eggs in one basket and I don't sit around waiting for someone else to invite me to their thing.

I'm not saying it's easy. And I'm not saying that putting myself out there creates instant business. I feel sorry for myself sometimes; it's human nature!

Entrepreneurship is a long game. Know that when opportunities "fall into your lap" it's often from the relationships you've created over time.

Just last week I received three training inquiries:

👉🏼One from a previous training client

👉🏼One from someone who's followed my work for a long time and has found a possible speaking slot for me

👉🏼And one from someone I spoke to months ago and now has an opportunity I might be a good fit for.

I also received three coaching inquiries:

👉🏼One from a previous client who has a new speaking engagement that she needs help with

👉🏼One from someone I've been connected with for years who just now needs my help

👉🏼And one from someone I don't know who found me on Google.

There are factors at play like fees, budgets, topic fit and timing that mean maybe not all of these will work out.

But it demonstrates that taking action—playing the long game, building relationships and making yourself visible—does work. If not immediately, then eventually!

Next time you're sad that you haven't been invited to the party, go ahead and find another party and ask for an invitation! And while you're at it, plan your own party and YOU make the invitations! 💌

Do not assume your message makes sense

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 2 Oct 2022 11:36:00 -0700

Do 🚫NOT🚫 assume that your message makes sense.

This fundraising email I received makes a couple of assumptions:

1️⃣ I know what GOTV and EOQ mean. And no, these acronyms were not explained elsewhere in the email.

2️⃣ I've read previous emails which might clarify these acronyms, so it's not necessary to do it this time.

I cannot emphasize enough that it is ALWAYS your responsibility—as a communicator, writer, marketer, content creator or presenter—to make your message as clear and simple as possible for your audience. Every time.

If they don't get it, it's not their fault.

👉🏼Reminder: Adults have big fragile egos.

People often won't raise their hand in your presentation to ask you to explain something, because they don't want to look foolish.

As unfortunate as that is, YOU (the communicator) must understand that if you don't make things clear, and your audience doesn't ask (or Google), you've lost them.

Funny story: A friend of mine contacted me a few years ago, perplexed about an email she had received from her local Toastmasters club. She'd been thinking of joining and had contacted a club with questions.

"...I wrote to them asking what the requirements are, and the guy wrote back that it's open to Toastmasters who've earned a CC. Really helpful. Not. What's a CC? Does it mean anything to you?"

When I explained the acronym, she wrote back:

"How 'competent' is a 'communicator' who answers a query from an interested newbie with an abbreviation that means nothing to them (me) without explaining it in English?"

How competent, indeed?

I'm picking on NAACP and Toastmasters here, but everyone is doing this (ESPECIALLY nonprofits), assuming your audience understands your words, acronyms, jargon and lingo.

They don't.

And they feel stupid asking.

So just👏🏼keep👏🏼it👏🏼simple👏🏼.

(Also... acronyms, jargon and lingo are BORING. 🤷🏻)

One perfect lime

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 18 Sep 2022 11:07:00 -0700

One perfect lime. The only lime our tree produced all year.

To be fair, it's a dwarf lime tree in a pot. So we don't expect dozens of limes.

We might feel disappointed about "only one lime." But on the other hand, this lime made last night's dinner absolutely perfect.

I doubt our little lime tree was disappointed in its efforts. Look what it made! This lime sat patiently on the tree, waiting for its moment to shine. And shine it did!

As a self-proclaimed "chillpreneur," I sometimes get down on myself for not doing more. Not being more. Not shining more.

I like to take things slow and easy. I'm not about the hustle. I'm about creating a lifestyle that keeps me healthy, happy and sane.

But to a client, I might be the "one perfect lime" that comes along at just the right time: doing, being and shining exactly as much as someone needs me to.

Last night's dinner was vegan fish taco bowls with Good Catch
plant-based fish sticks.

The lime appeared as both juice and zest, in cilantro lime rice and chipotle mayo, and squeezed over the separate elements of the dish, the radishes, arugula microgreens, cilantro, and avocado.

The meal was delicious and the lime was the star! 🌟

Right lime, right place, right time. What more could I ask for?

Who decides what's "inappropriate?"

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sat, 3 Sep 2022 12:54:00 -0700

She complained that I said "pee."

Once upon a time, an audience member e-mailed me to say that my language was inappropriate and to demand that I send an apology to the audience of 22 women.

(For context, I was explaining that your attendees need breaks during a long workshop or presentation or they'll be resentful when they have to get up to pee and miss some of your content.)

Also, I didn't say "resentful." I said "pissed off." She was offended by that, too.

If I had known the Ministry of Ladylike and Appropriate Language was going to be at my presentation, I would've...

…still said "pee."

I reviewed the evaluations and had a conversation with the president of the organization, one of my 1:1 clients. I had thoroughly researched the group when I accepted the engagement.

She and I concluded that this was the opinion of one person and not of the entire group. My client wasn't offended and apparently, neither was anyone else.

But it did bring up questions. How exactly can you KNOW what's going to offend someone? WHO decides what's "inappropriate?"

She was offended, but was I offensive?

Ideally, some words, attitudes and behaviors would always be considered universally inappropriate (think hate speech or the most vulgar curse words). And it would be easy to know what would offend people.

But we know for a fact that many people are not in agreement over what even constitutes sexist, racist, ableist, ageist, homophobic or transphobic language.

When I shared with my speaker friends that I had never had a complaint about offending someone, one of my colleagues said,

"You pressed the button...but she already had it installed."

Each of us presents on different topics.

Each of us has a unique personality and way of expressing ourselves.

Each audience is different and full of individuals.

The reactions we hope for vary from topic to topic, from attendee to attendee, from speaker to speaker.

Sometimes we're surprised when the reaction we get isn't the reaction we expected!

P.S. If you think my language was inappropriate, there's no need to share your feedback. I processed this incident years ago.

Stop thinking you have to know everything

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 28 Jul 2022 18:22:00 -0700

Things no one expects you to know (without at least some research):

1. How to pronounce "floccinaucinihilipilification"

2. How to make Kung Pao chicken

3. Every word in the Constitution of the United States

4. What's causing that pain in your lower left abdomen

5. How to fix your own dryer

So why is there so much discomfort around not knowing "business things?"

As an entrepreneur, it can feel like you have to know everything about everything.

But you don't have to become an expert in every aspect of your business.

If your business isn't marketing, you'll have to learn a few things about marketing (or hire someone to do it for you).

If your business isn't bookkeeping, you'll have to learn a few things about bookkeeping (or hire someone to do it for you).

If your business isn't giving presentations, you'll have to learn a few things about effective public speaking.

Except this isn't something you can pay someone else to do!

If you're an entrepreneur, your big why, your one-of-a-kind skills and talents, your area of expertise... you alone can bring that to the world.

You don't have to become a speaking expert to build visibility, awareness, networks, reputation, and lead your people competently and capably.

But speaking is a unique skill that you should be cultivating if you're the face of your organization.

If you don't know how to do it well, that's okay.

If you have some experience, but you're not getting the results you want, that's okay!

If you've been doing it for a long time, but haven't leveled up your skills, that's okay!

Nobody expects you to be an expert.

At the same time...

Your audiences, employees, volunteers, board, stakeholders, and peers do expect a certain level of proficiency, and a level of conscientiousness, effort and thoughtfulness.

And they do expect a level of connection and engagement that's not just lecturing, reading from bullet points, or throwing together a few points at the last minute.

Stop thinking you have to know everything.

Do own and embrace your responsibility to be an effective communicator for understanding, influence, inspiration and relationship-building, and for expressing purpose, vision, values and goals.

They're never going to be ready for you

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sat, 16 Jul 2022 22:56:00 -0700

Nobody is ever ready for the people who are going to make the biggest impact.

Nobody is ever ready for the outspoken thought leaders with the nontraditional ideas and the bold presence.

They may be craving EXACTLY what you have to offer, but they don't know it yet.

That's the whole point of standing out as a changemaker.

My friend Precious Williams posted the other day "Remember when we all wanted to look, sound, and act successful and polished? Remember when we felt we had to fit in to be successful?" And she asked "Are they ready for the next version of you?"

My reply was "They're never ready, but I'm here anyway."🤷🏻

I'm guessing no one is ready for what they're going to experience when cutting-edge peeps like Joanne Lockwood, Dr. Tina Opie, Madison Butler, Pegine Echevarria and Precious walk into a room.

If they're ready for you, it's too late. You're already one of the crowd.

If they're ready for you, you're already blending in. You're already "safe."

So to me, the question is really "Are you ready for them NOT to be ready for YOU?"

Put yourself out there anyway. You're forging a path and paving the way for others to come behind you.

Someone has to be in front.

It's you.

You don't have to start a revolution

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 8 Jul 2022 10:28:00 -0700

Guess what! You don't have to start a revolution! The revolution is already happening.

There are plenty of people out there, established groups and organizations that you can join. There's no need to reinvent the wheel.

Do some research. Look around to see who's already doing what you want to do. And then get involved. You do not have to start from scratch!

Here are some to get started:

EMILY's List

HIGHER HEIGHTS FOR AMERICA

She Should Run

LGBTQ Victory Institute

Black Girls Vote

National Organization for Women

In Our Own Voice: National Black Women's Reproductive Justice Agenda

Red Wine and Blue

Everytown for Gun Safety

Rock the Vote

Postcards to Voters

National Women's Law Center

SisterSong

Planned Parenthood Federation of America

Elevated Access

Sister District Project

Southern Poverty Law Center

Anti-Defamation League

Your presentation is like a bird's nest...

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 1 Jun 2022 11:12:00 -0700

This mama Dark-eyed Junco has been building her nest in a potted plant just outside our front door for a couple weeks. She's been building it in secret; we literally never see her there but when we peek in the nest there's more material.

This made me think about you! And your presentations. 🤭 Inexperienced presenters often think that your performance in front of the audience is the most important thing.

And yes, if it's important to you to change attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors with your presentation, then your performance in front of the audience and your ability to engage and persuade is pretty important.

However your live presentation with an audience is just the final result of all the behind-the-scenes work that you should be putting in to ensure that you get the results that you and the audience need, want and care about.

That means:

🥚 determining your objectives for the presentation

🥚 researching your audience and location

🥚 choosing content that's most relevant and useful to your audience

🥚 tailoring, organizing and structuring your content so you lead them down a path to the desired result

🥚 building in engagement, exercises and activities that help your participants apply your content to their lives or work

🥚 practicing your presentation to establish a flow and estimate how much time each element takes

🥚 and understanding and practicing your tech; and cultivating the right mindset and energy management tools for the particular environment you'll be in.

The work that this mama birdie put into finding the right mate (he'll also defend the nest and help feed the nestlings), finding the right location for her nest, finding the right materials for her nest, and building the actual nest is what allows and supports the final result of laying eggs and protecting her offspring until they fledge.

I didn't see all the work that went into this final result, but I know it's there. And without all that work, there would be no nest, no eggs, and no babies. 🐦🥚🐣

The foundational work of a presentation is critical to its success. The presentation itself is just the tip of the iceberg. Or... just one straw in the completion of a successful bird's nest.

P.S. I just went outside to shoot an updated video of the nest, and I saw the mama's head just peeking out. I didn't want to disturb her. So this video is from a few days ago. And babies are on the way! Wish our little family safety and success and protection from predators. Which, luckily, is not something speakers ever have to worry about! 🦅

Why you should do podcast interviews... and it's not why you think

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sat, 16 Apr 2022 12:46:00 -0700

I just had the most amazing conversation with Karen LaMarsh for her Real Life Startup podcast, and it made me realize why I enjoy being interviewed so much.

Sure, we all want to build our credibility and visibility through sharing our ideas and intellectual property via speaking and interviews.

But here's the REAL reason you should be doing podcasts (and speaking, and creating video, and writing...): Every time you open your mouth to talk about your ideas, they get better.

Especially when you have a host asking you questions and restating your ideas. At least three times today during my conversation with Karen, I had an aha moment about my own message and my own marketing.

She rephrased things I said and reiterated my ideas in a way that helped me gain even deeper insight into what I want my message to be!

When we explain, interpret and clarify our ideas via speaking or writing, our ideas often become more clear to ourselves.

Maybe you'll get more clients and customers if you get interviewed on podcasts or speak in front of an audience. But also, maybe you'll get more clarity on your message, continuing to improve and refine it as you go!

My 4 speaking nonnegotiables

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 10 Apr 2022 11:30:00 -0700

What's your biggest concern about speaking? (You don't have to answer out loud.)

Whatever it is, I have 4 simple solutions that will address it!

The first one is preparation. I know everyone hates preparation. Nobody wants to make time for it. Preparation is just unloved. But you can't deliver the same presentation to an audience of travel agents that you're going to deliver to an audience of accountants.

Each audience is different and you can't approach different audiences with the exact same presentation. So preparation is that really boring thing that you have to do in advance so your presentations are tailored to the people you're speaking to.

Next is engagement. This is absolutely critical to creating an experience for your audience that they'll remember, that they'll take with them, that will motivate them to take action.

Engagement is how you actually get their brains to retain your information. Engagement doesn't mean being silly or pulling out a ukulele or making the audience all high-five each other.

There are a lot of things we hate in presentations. And one of these is when a speaker tries to engage us in a contrived way. But there are a lot of ways to engage your audience that can be authentic to you and not contrived.

Third is mindset. Probably most of the negative thoughts you have about getting in front of an audience aren't based in reality. It's all imagined. And because of that, you can change your mindset.

Mindset is both internal and external: it's how you perceive yourself, and it's also the outward manifestation of that perception of yourself. Developing a positive mindset is something I work on with a LOT of my clients.

The last thing is differentiating yourself by embracing your unique voice, personality and point of view. Being real creates connection. There's no substitute for getting on stage and connecting, bringing your own special qualities every time you get in front of an audience.

Which one of these four pillars of successful speaking would solve your biggest speaking concern? Reach out if you need support!

Following my calling

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 10 Apr 2022 11:13:00 -0700

A colleague of mine told me I left her hanging when I stopped posting my #ThisIsWhatProfessionalLooksLike campaign. She said that I had been on 🔥🔥🔥 and then everything stopped.

And she's right. The truth is, I felt uncertain about what to do next, where to go next. I got stuck. I froze. I dropped off. I felt like I needed a plan or a direction and because I don't, I got cold feet and quit posting.

I feel so CALLED to share my personal vision of inclusivity - that whatever your ethnic, religious or educational background, your age, weight, size, gender identity, race, appearance, mental health status, hair color or style, skin color or skin decoration, choice of personal self-expression, ability or disability, or sexual orientation, that 👉🏼👉🏾👉🏻👉🏿👉YOU 🔴🟠🟡🟢🔵🟣 are [what a professional looks like.]

My friend reminded me that I don't have to know what comes next. I don't have to control the outcome. I just have to keep showing up, spreading the word and #SpeakingUpForChange.

But I need your help, peeps.

I can represent myself: the middle-aged white, cisgender straight woman with pink hair, giant earrings, bright multi-patterned outfits, no makeup (okay, in this pic I was FULLY made up for my course filming with Madecraft!), flat shoes, bare arms, big mouth and bold opinions.

But I can't represent ALL the people who are diminished, overlooked and outright discriminated against because they don't fit a particular "socially-acceptable" norm.

I need voices to amplify, and I need fellow warriors!

This is where all of you can help spread the word that THIS IS WHAT PROFESSIONAL LOOKS LIKE!

I need the pink- and purple-haired warriors, the tattooed warriors, the trans warriors, the disability warriors, the nonbinary warriors, the nonconforming-and-self-expressed-in-other-ways warriors, everyone who's out there keepin' it real, and so many more of you I can't even tag here.

🏆Pro tip: You don't have to be a diversity and inclusion specialist to speak up for inclusion!

🏆You don't need to be a mental health expert to share your experiences.

🏆You don't have to be an expert on anything to speak your truth about what it means to be marginalized as a professional and to inspire others (who are still hiding) by your visibility.

So I need to unfreeze, unblock and unstick myself. Get back to work amplifying the professionals who inspire me with their willingness to show up in their fully human form. And keep showing up in mine.

Because if there's one group I can relate to almost more than any other, it's the UNPROFESSIONAL PROFESSIONAL! 😉

Join us on LinkedIn and don't forget the hashtag... #ThisIsWhatProfessionalLooksLike

Not every hobby needs to become a business

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 10 Apr 2022 11:01:00 -0700

Not every hobby needs to be a business.

I've made jewelry for as long as I can remember. It's a creative outlet for me, and I can't not do it.

In 2004, I got laid off for the third time in four years. At that point, I decided to leave the non-profit sector, since it seemed they all had the same problem: creating a position funded by a grant, but then not raising the money to sustain the position in the long term. (Can anyone relate? 🙋🙋🏼‍♀️🙋🏾)

While trying to decide what to do next, I decided to turn my jewelry hobby into a business. After all, how hard could it be?

Turns out, pretty hard. Not because the business itself was a bad idea, but because the kind of BUSINESS I wanted to have could not be sustained by the kind of WORK I wanted to do.

See, I love making one-of-a-kind pieces. I don't want to mass-produce. I buy my materials in very small quantities because I don't want to repeat the same design over and over again.

So that was the first roadblock I put up for myself. And then, back in 2004, before Etsy even existed, I would have to schlep all my jewelry to craft shows up and down the state. I did have a website, but it was pretty hard to get noticed, and people really like to see how something looks on them in a mirror.

During that period, I met so many amazing creators and makers who I'm still friends with today. But it was exhausting. My husband would go with me if he could, but most of the time I was doing craft shows by myself.

And... in 2005, I opened my public speaking coaching and training business. A business that I knew would be sustainable, where I could meet most of my needs for creative inspiration, and where I could, to be honest, make a lot more money!

Oh, and at the time, I was still running the non-profit I had co-founded in 1997. So I was running a jewelry business, starting a training business, and wrapping up my time with my non-profit. I couldn't keep going on that way!

In 2007, I closed up the jewelry business and began to devote 100% of my time to the coaching and training.

I couldn't even make jewelry for myself for probably a good year. I was so over it. It wasn't fun anymore. I had turned it into something that was just not enjoyable.

15 years later, and I've almost come full circle. I do sell my jewelry again, but only for fun, only if someone reaches out and asks me about a particular piece that I've shown on social media. I've done a couple of craft shows over the past few years, just small local events that don't involve a lot of work, or driving.

I love my hobby again. It will never again be a full-fledged business, and that's okay. Just because you love doing something - and even if you're really good at it - doesn't mean you should try to make a living at it!

Why is it okay to not know some things, but not okay to not know other things? 🤔

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 27 Mar 2022 13:39:00 -0700

It never occurred to me until about 10 days ago that I could put a shower cap on and keep my hairdo for an extra day!

Is anyone going to think I'm an idiot for not having thought of this before? And if they do, do I really care? I don't know everything. 🤷🏻

So now let me ask you this... Why are you embarrassed to admit you don't know everything about public speaking and presentations?

SOOOO many people are embarrassed about asking for help on things they aren't experts in. Guess what: you can't be an expert on everything!

You're an expert in some areas, and it's your job to know about those areas.

But you don't have to know everything about accounting, marketing, sales, coaching, speaking, or other things that are outside your area of expertise, right?

If you take your car to a repair shop, are you embarrassed that you don't know how to repair your car? If you have somebody do alterations to a pair of pants, are you embarrassed that you don't know how to sew?

I actually have clients who don't want their names on my website, even though they'll give me testimonials. Because they don't want anyone to know they went to a speaking coach.

Look, I just figured out that a shower cap is my new best friend. I'm 56 years old and I never thought of using a shower cap. Big fucking deal!

Do you need help with your speaking? There's nothing to be embarrassed about! I study this every day. It's my life's work. It's not yours. It's perfectly okay not to know stuff.

So how about reaching out and getting some support?

Successful speakers stay curious

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sun, 27 Mar 2022 13:34:00 -0700

Are you a curious person? Do you always need to know WHY? WHAT? WHO? WHEN? WHERE?

When a car starts up at 11:30 p.m. in my neighborhood and drives away, I wonder why.

The other day I stood beneath a tree for a good 5 minutes trying to find the bird that was singing! (It was the ever-elusive Hooded Oriole!)

My Google search history is full of questions like "Are most serial killers white?" "How to pronounce Aix," "Can Supreme Court justices be impeached?" 😉 And "Did Gerald Coffee write a poem about eating half a bug?"

I literally consider every experience I have to be a potential metaphor for public speaking. Everything I see, hear, and learn is something that I can turn into an unexpected lesson for my clients and my audiences.

If you're a speaker, you can't be telling the same stories in the same way for years. You can't be using the same examples, same images, and same analogies for years.

Sure, sometimes you have a really great example that stands the test of time. We all do. But I've also pulled out stories that happened so long ago that they're just not current anymore. And I know there are more current examples I can use.

Your presentation still needs constant refreshing, because new things are happening in the world all the time.

When you can use new, fresh examples and stories that people can resonate with NOW you're going to make a better connection. Your audience will learn and retain more of your content and be more inclined to take action.

And if that's not the purpose of presenting, then I don't know what is!

You are not the distraction

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sat, 26 Feb 2022 12:40:00 -0800

Let's talk about real distractions:

❌ Wordy and poorly designed slides
❌ Jangling change in your pocket
❌ Constant fiddling with hair and jewelry
❌ A monotonous or grating voice
❌ Overused crutch words and fillers
❌ Uncontrolled movement and pacing

What is not a distraction is you bringing your whole self to the presentation.

We've been told that we shouldn't "distract" with our appearance. That it takes away from the message.

But you are not separate from your message. You and your message are intertwined. You bring your message to life.

A personality void on stage is not what audiences want.

Audiences want a fully-formed human to connect with. They want an authentic relationship with you.

✅ Got tattoos?
✅ Purple hair?
✅ Giant earrings?
✅ A natural afro puff?
✅ Facial hair?
✅ A lisp?
✅ An accent?
✅ A disability?

Don't hide. Don't do the audience (and yourself) the disservice of incongruence.

Who you are, what you believe, what you say, what you do, how you look: It's all YOU.

Bring it.

Transformation isn't all it's cracked up to be

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 25 Feb 2022 16:15:00 -0800

We are obsessed with transformation. And I'm in the coaching world, so I should know!⁠

⁠Everywhere you look, there's another quote encouraging us to keep going, keep striving, because one day we will emerge as a beautiful butterfly.⁠

⁠This one from The Little Prince has got to be the most depressing: "Well, I must endure the presence of a few caterpillars if I wish to become acquainted with the butterflies."⁠

⁠Caterpillars (both butterfly and moth larvae) are just as varied as butterflies. They can be fuzzy, furry, spiky, horned, smooth, bright, striped, or spotted.⁠

⁠They exist for the pleasure of eating and growing bigger and bigger. They also contribute to the ecosystem by serving as highly nutritious food for birds and other predators. One naturalist calls moth caterpillars "nature's hotdogs." 🌭😆⁠

⁠(By the way, butterflies are also bird food. All that miraculous transformation doesn't protect them from predators.)⁠

⁠🐛𝗪𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗽𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗮𝗿𝘀.🐛⁠

⁠We go through mini-transformations on a regular basis while in our caterpillar state. Just like a caterpillar molts and sheds its skin several times as it grows bigger, we also grow as we shed our old ways, ideas, attitudes and behaviors.⁠⁠

We can keep doing that over and over throughout our lifetimes.⁠

⁠However, once a butterfly goes through its final major transformation, it only lives for a few short weeks. The butterfly stage is the END. There is no further transformation. ⁠

⁠Why are we so eager to get out of the caterpillar stage?⁠

⁠Personally, I'm happy to stay in my caterpillar stage as long as I can, all cute and chubby and colorful. To keep exploring, keep growing, keep eating everything in sight 😉. I'm in no hurry for the "end" to come, whatever that even is. ⁠

⁠Is it even possible to stop growing? Would I want to?⁠

⁠P.S. I just hope I don't get chomped by a hungry Grosbeak.⁠

4 things I learned this week

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Sat, 12 Feb 2022 14:02:00 -0800

1. I often add new things to my business while forgetting to subtract, which makes my business cluttered, complicated, and messy. I'm grateful to my coach for setting me straight this week.

2. As a coach, I face clients who are stuck and struggling, and the truth is, I can't fix them. I can give all the tools I have, and be a support, but they have to fix their own problems. Good reminder.

3. I forget how amazing it is to feel inspired! I'm good at getting things done without major inspiration, but when I do get inspired by some great coaching and reflection, its like gold!

4. It's so scary at first to try new things, and especially to put yourself out there for people to see you trying new things! But it's so rewarding for the personal and professional growth. I highly recommend getting out of your comfort zone!

What did you learn this week?

Are you shaming yourself for surviving?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 13 Jan 2022 13:31:00 -0800

I was brought to tears this week listening to a client talk about her current situation.

Like many in the speaking and training industry, which is deeply intertwined with the hospitality and travel industries, she's had to find another source of income during the past two years.

Some of my friends and colleagues have left the industry completely, leaving entrepreneurship behind for the security of a paycheck so they can keep a roof over their head and feed their families.

Others are barely hanging on, still pursuing opportunities while taking on part-time gig work like driving for Uber or doing Instacart shopping.

The shame and embarrassment that's hanging over the heads of so many entrepreneurs for having to supplement their income during this pandemic really hit me the other day, and the weight of it all brought me to tears.

There's a lot about this pandemic to bring someone to tears, of course.

But for those who are doing what they can to keep food on the table, and pay bills and rent, I want to honor you.

There's nothing to be embarrassed about or feel ashamed of.

I know it's easy for me to say that, and it's not easy to let go of shame.

For many of us, our work is a huge part of our identity, especially when we've built a business that has our face on the front of it.

What do you say when people ask "what do you do?" and you've been a speaker, trainer, financial advisor, coach, chef, bookstore owner, tour operator or something else you've created from scratch... and you've had to close your business or find other work?

Who are you now?

It feels so heavy to hold onto the identity. To hope and dream of going back to that work. To feel ashamed or embarrassed about "failing" and being unable to keep it all together.

If you need permission to let go of it all, maybe I can give you that permission. If you can't give yourself grace, maybe I can help by seeing you, hearing you, crying with you.

You're still worthy. You're still brilliant. You're still the person you've always been. You did not fail. You're SURVIVING.

This shit is HARD. I read a post today that said "You can have a better year *just* [my emphasis] by changing the way you think about things." Gee, that sounds great, but it's not that easy.

I'm no therapist, so I'm sharing with you what I need to also do for me:

🔸Be gentle with myself.

🔸Be caring and compassionate toward myself.

🔸Stop telling myself I "should" be in a different place than where I am.

🔸Stop comparing myself to others, because I have NO idea what's really going on with them. Lots of people are good at hiding their struggles.

🔸Focus on what I CAN control in my life. I cannot control the pandemic or what it's doing to my industry.

🔸Be here now, but stay optimistic about the future, whatever it holds.

What would you add?

Sending you all love and kindness. 💗

Gardening, not architecture

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 8 Dec 2021 15:58:00 -0800

This is a quote from a card in the Oblique Strategies deck created by Brian Eno and Peter Schmidt. The deck was created with a variety of prompts and constraints to help artists and musicians break through creative blocks.

This is also a great tip for anyone creating a presentation, and especially as I delivered my micro-presentations training four times on Monday and Tuesday - in a micro-presentations format - I'm going to be sharing this concept further in my trainings and coaching!

Architecture implies that you first design a structure, and then you build the structure as designed.

Gardening, however, is a process. You may design the garden in a particular way, but the garden will not always grow as you envision it.

You'll have weeds. You'll have some plants that take over and kill other plants. You'll have some plants that just don't thrive. You'll have others that thrive during part of the year, but are dormant at other times of the year. And you'll have plants that only thrive when they're pruned and trimmed.

All of these things are true of your presentation.

You can design the "perfect" presentation, down to the last detail of every slide and the exact perfect wording.

But you'll get in front of your participants and guess what: Your technology will fail. Your story will go too long. You'll lose your place. Your humor will fall flat. You'll mess up your transitions. Your participants will interrupt or take too long with their questions. You'll run out of time, leaving your best example on the cutting room floor.

Your presentation is a LIVING THING. It only comes to life when you bring it to an audience, and every time you deliver it, you're facing a new set of circumstances.

Every audience is different. Every situation is different. Sometimes you'll present hours after a school shooting. Sometimes you'll present the day after a national election. Sometimes you'll present on two hours of sleep.

This week, I delivered my micro-presentations training on one day to Canadian professional speakers and on one day to an LGBTQIA audience. And then I went back to scripting the same workshop into micro-segments for a professionally filmed course that will likely go out to corporate audiences.

Your presentation is not architecture. It's a garden, and it continues to grow, shrink, die back and thrive again with the constraints/pruning required of each new situation and audience.

How's your mental game?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 15:06:00 -0800

Athletes know that a major component of being successful in sports is having the right mental attitude or mindset. Presenting is a lot like playing a sport both in the physical and mental preparation aspects, but a lot of presenters' mental game is not up to the challenge.

What do I mean by "mental game?"

1. Anticipate, plan and prepare for anything that might go wrong

What happens if your computer crashes while you're showing slides? What happens if you lose your place? What happens if someone challenges your facts during Q&A?

Sometimes you're prepared to speak for an hour, but the meeting before you goes long and your time gets cut. Sometimes you expect an audience of fifty and you get an audience of five.

Having a strong mental game means being able to shift gears at a moment's notice, take what you're given, and run with it.

2. Reframe nervousness into positive attitude and energy

There's no difference between "bad" and "good" adrenaline - your thoughts assign adrenaline negative or positive value. Thought stopping, positive self-talk, relaxation and other mental and physical tools can get you in a calmer state to face your audience.

3. Visualize yourself relaxed and connecting with the audience

Envision yourself nailing your presentation in front of a satisfied and smiling audience. Elite athletes use visualization and mental rehearsal both to imagine a successful outcome of an event and to rest and relax.

4. Give 100% when you only feel 50%

I've presented with a 104-degree fever. I've given a training on two hours of sleep. I've delivered workshops while dealing with grief and loss. Your audience deserves your very best. If you can't reschedule (and I would've if I could've!), give them what they came for and recover later.

5. Accept that mishaps will happen, and handle them with grace and humor

Everyone makes mistakes, and most of the time your audience doesn't even know you've messed up. Suck it up, laugh it off, and move on!

The mental game of speaking parallels the mental game of sports, and speakers can learn a lot from athletes who use these tools.

What else would you add to my list? Please share!

Five free and low-cost ways to learn about public speaking!

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 5 Nov 2021 12:44:00 -0700

Tag and share with your peeps!

Instagram

Facebook

Free ebook

Presenting for Humans

Interviews/podcasts

YouTube Channel

Three options for when you have to speak after "that guy"

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 3 Nov 2021 08:47:00 -0700

Price is not the same as value

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 28 Oct 2021 08:52:00 -0700

Our bath towels have been looking ratty for a while. I don't care so much about my own use, but I've been looking for a new set for when guests come over.

There are so many deals on towels out there! And I kept reading reviews and thinking, "Wow, this is a great deal, but are they good towels?"

And then it hit me.

We haven't bought towels in over a decade. 🤯 And yet, very few of them are actually shredded or in bad enough shape that we can't use them. I started to wonder what the cost per use had turned out to be. Pennies? Fractions of pennies?

I told my husband about a set of towels I found for $100 and how they sounded really great but really expensive, and he pointed out how long towels last and how many uses we get out of them. If these towels last another 20 or 30 years, is $100 a good value?

As a speaking coach, I get a lot of tire-kickers, people who are looking for the cheapest option, not the best value.

And I've done the same over the years. It took me a LONG time to start investing REAL money in my business, in my learning, in my coaching.

And what happened when I stopped looking for the cheapest products and services? I found exceptional value: Programs and products that would serve me for YEARS, much longer than the actual amount of time I spent in the program or working with the coach.

Some of my investments pay off immediately; some pay off over time.

That's not to say that every high-priced offer is worth it. Research is required, and sometimes we're disappointed with the outcomes.

(And sometimes we're disappointed with the outcomes because we didn't do the work!

Sometimes good value comes at a low-low price. But pay attention to the "cost per use."

Pay attention to the long-term value you'll get from working with an experienced and knowledgeable coach. It might cost more, but it'll be worth it when you're still using what you learned years later!

FYI: I've got some great value for you in my Unlimited Quick Results Laser Coaching program! Keep me in your back pocket for just-in-time coaching!

Put me in your pocket for just-in-time coaching

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 27 Oct 2021 09:33:00 -0700

Who needs a speaking coach in your back pocket? 🙋🏽‍♀️🙋🏼‍♀️

My Unlimited Quick Results Laser Coaching program is for experienced speakers and leaders who want to grow your visibility and credibility, and still need regular tweaks, updates and refreshers (don’t we all?) to your presentation, your vision, your mindset, your positioning and your next right action.

🌠 Clarify and strengthen your core message

🌠 Check the flow of your ideas and audience journey

🌠 Create an engagement strategy

🌠 Develop or practice your powerful opening or closing

🌠 Lay out your content structure and timing (especially for those micro-presentations that are popping up all over!)

🌠 Make sure your unique style and personality is coming through

🌠 Brush up on your remote delivery, engagement tools or tech

🌠 Practice any of the above

🌠 Work on any aspect of your content, mindset, or delivery that’s holding you back from being your best self in front of your in-person or remote audience

🌠 Create your speaking vision, plan, process and action steps to get you where you want to be!

Reserve your 1:1 spot with me here.

Don't sweat the platitudes... and they're all platitudes

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 26 Oct 2021 08:33:00 -0700

I need to have a chat with you about platitudes.

"Don't sweat the small stuff... and it's all small stuff."

Who decides what's small in YOUR life? What might seem small to someone else might seem huge to you. It is certainly NOT all small stuff.

Or "What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger."

What doesn't kill you can often make you sicker, weaker, or otherwise impaired (hello long-haul COVID). Not everyone comes away stronger from adversity.

How about "Good things take time?" I saw that on a greeting card at Trader Joe's and picked it up because I liked the phrase and the colors, and I thought it related well to something I wanted to teach about speaking.

But you know what? Sometimes good things take practically NO time! I mean, a quick summer salad of ripe tomatoes, fresh burrata cheese, and a drizzle of olive oil takes about five minutes, but it's delicious.

Sometimes a work of art or a book takes years to complete. Other times, the creativity just flows and the work is finished in weeks.

So how long are you willing to wait for that "good thing?" How long is TOO long?

And therein lies one issue with platitudes. Not only are they trite, shallow, and unoriginal, but they're not even true. Or maybe true some of the time but not enough of the time.

On top of that, platitudes can make us feel like we're not doing life right.

Like "I know it's all small stuff, so why can't I move on?"

Or "I know I should live and let live, but how can I turn a blind eye to injustice and oppression?"

Or "I know they say it will all be worth it in the end, but I'm not sure I can go on like this."

Nathan J. Robinson says, "If we accept suffering, for example, as natural and inevitable, then it is easier to be comfortable with the existence of large amounts of it. If it simply 'is what it is,' then getting enraged by it is futile and irrational. But to me, that’s monstrous.

We have to examine things critically rather than passively accepting tautological justifications for them. To do otherwise is to be both morally and intellectually lazy."

Robinson also points out that some platitudes ARE true and also profound, like "Be the change you wish to see in the world." That's a worthy goal, to be sure.

If you're going to be on stage (or use social media as a platform for your cause or message) at least share your own ideas, as much as any of our ideas can be new again.

There are absolutely fresh ways to express timeless ideas that keep you from melting into the masses posting tired cliches.

Do we really need someone to tell us AGAIN: "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care???"

Raise your hand if you roll your eyes 39 times a day at motivational platitudes. 🙋🏻‍♀️🙄

It's okay to be "unprofessional"

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Tue, 19 Oct 2021 14:03:00 -0700

"Emotion in business is unprofessional."
"Black women's natural hair is unprofessional."
"Tattoos are unprofessional."
"Facial hair is unprofessional."
"Poor grammar/spelling is unprofessional."

And for speakers (I've actually heard these):

"Flat shoes are unprofessional."
"Curly hair is unprofessional."
"Showing bare arms is unprofessional."
"Not wearing makeup is unprofessional."
"Saying 'um' is unprofessional."
"Sitting down while presenting is unprofessional."

Oftentimes, we're told our appearance is unprofessional if we don't meet gender norms or dominant cultural norms.

Other times, not living up to certain educational or other social norms peg us as "unprofessional."

There are definitely things I would call out as unprofessional in business:

👎🏼 Lack of respect for colleagues or customers
👎🏼 Consistently showing up late
👎🏼 Being unresponsive to emails or phone calls
👎🏼 Taking credit for others' work
👎🏼 Lying

But I will fight you over the lists above. 🥊 (If you want to argue with me about spelling and grammar, Google "literacy privilege.")

And I will keep serving my clients with alternating pink and gray hair, five-inch long earrings, visible tattoo, and flat shoes.

Because these things have nothing to do with how well I do my job and everything to do with me being a fulfilled, aligned, and happy human being.

As Madison Butler 🏳️‍🌈🦄 (one of my favorite DEI advocates on LinkedIn) says: "I'm not for everyone." 😉

What have you heard is "unprofessional" in business that you disagree with? Let me know in the comments!

(You can also comment on or like the original LinkedIn post here. It's currently at 404 reactions, 131 comments, 20+ shares, and 14,866 views in the feed.)

Does Tom Brady even eat bread?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 19 Aug 2021 13:04:00 -0700

Have you seen the new Subway commercial featuring Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady?

The dialogue goes like this:

Brady: This new turkey Cali Fresh is incredible
Stephen Curry: You even eat bread?
Brady: Steph, it's a commercial.

I don't follow Tom Brady, so I wasn't aware of his dietary choices and lifestyle. But Curry's question, "You even eat bread?" made me look it up.

Turns out Tom Brady has his own diet plan called the TB12 Method, that came out in a book in 2017.

Summarized on the Healthline website, "The Tom Brady Diet encourages eating minimally processed, whole foods and restricting processed ones. It recommends avoiding foods deemed inflammatory or acidifying and includes a few additional rules."

One of the rules is avoiding gluten.🍞🥖🥪

Hence Steph Curry's question.

Whether or not you find this endorsement hypocritical, there's something you can take away from this commercial to improve your presentations.

👉🏼Always anticipate objections.👈🏼

When you give a presentation, there will likely ALWAYS be someone in your audience who is critical of your message, who doesn't believe you, who has some concern about your topic.

Most of the time, the people who object to your message or ideas won't speak up. This means they're stewing, resistant, or at least distracted by their own objections... and they're not fully engaged with you.

Sometimes they will speak up, and you can plan in advance to have answers to their questions.

Or, you can build the objection into your presentation, by saying something like "I know some of you are probably thinking 'this won't work' or 'I've already tried it,' and let me address that."

When you KNOW there are objections, don't wait for the audience to bring them up. Build them into your presentation; acknowledge the audience's concerns and show them you've done your homework.

Brady's response to Curry's question about eating bread, "it's a commercial," doesn't really answer the question "Why is Brady endorsing something he doesn't eat?" He might as well have said, "I got paid." I'm going to go out on a limb and say his critics were not satisfied by that answer.

But the point I want to make here is that Subway built in the objection by having Steph Curry ask the question. It's the question on the minds of everyone who sees the commercial and knows about Brady's restrictive eating habits.

At least in a presentation, you have time with your audience to address objections. This commercial clearly doesn't say enough, and Brady is being called out all over for this endorsement.

Just remember: There will always be someone who objects to your message, your ideas and your methods, so don't be caught off guard.

At minimum, be prepared to address objections from audience questions, and ideally, 🛠build🛠 objections into your presentation so your audience knows you get them.

Brands. Door. Money.

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Fri, 30 Jul 2021 10:42:00 -0700

I, like most people these days, avoid commercials as much as possible by streaming and recording shows and movies. But from time to time, I catch a glimpse of something as I'm skipping through them that makes me stop and watch. Yes, I actually choose to watch an occasional commercial.

TV commercials are mini-presentations, mini-stories. Each commercial is trying to get a message across and influence those watching to do something, whether it's to buy (most commercials), to join, or to give.

Just like presentations, some commercials are engaging, some are boring, some are just idiotic. Some are funny, some are heartbreaking and some leave us angry.

But one thing all commercials have in common is their brevity. Commercials range from 15 seconds to a minute, with the majority falling into the 30-second range. You struggle to get your message across in ten minutes or an hour? Commercials don't have that luxury (when they do, they're called infomercials, but that's not what I'm addressing here).

What's the difference between your presentation and a commercial? Not much. Both must engage, inform, influence, and entertain. People act out stories in commercials, and presenters tell stories. Both use visuals, sometimes but not always.

Presenters can learn a lot from commercials, especially about getting your message across in a concise and brief manner.

Here's an old favorite for brevity and conciseness that I share when I'm delivering my workshops on micro-presentations. There's nothing superfluous here. There's no confusion about the main points or message. Visuals are simple and so is content. And yet, it catches your attention with both its simplicity and its originality. And it's only 15 seconds long.

What commercials have going for them is that those who produce them are expected to be creative and imaginative. Creativity is not only expected but welcomed and celebrated.

This is not necessarily the case with business presentations, whose producers seem to believe that there is no place for creativity in a business setting. Hence the dry and boring presentations we're subjected to on a daily basis.

What can you learn from TV commercials that you can implement in your presentations?

How can you apply creative ideas and ingenuity to your presentations so they don't blend in with every other drab presentation your audiences have to sit through?

How can you use brevity and conciseness to get your most critical points across with nothing extraneous or irrelevant to cloud your message?

What commercials have you enjoyed as good presentation models?

What if you lost your words?

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 11:51:00 -0700

Remember how boring "vocab" was when we were in school? Learning the meanings of endless words that we probably would never use?

I don't think of vocabulary very often, but since my dad had a stroke on Tuesday, it's been top of mind. He briefly lost his ability to communicate, and even hours later, was still transposing words and unable to capture the words he wanted to say.

My dad is a COMMUNICATOR, in all caps! He's always loved words and language, and when I was growing up, "Get out the dictionary" was our most-repeated command! I get my love of language and words from my dad, most definitely. 📚

He reminded me the other day, from his hospital bed, of the enormous vocabulary I had as a child. He said, "Remember when they tested your vocabulary in elementary school? Remember how many words you knew?" I don't remember the number, but apparently it was impressive.

He reflected on how it's better to start out with a huge vocabulary, then if you have a stroke and lose some of your words, you'll still have plenty to work with! Haha - My dad and I are both optimists. We're all about the silver lining. 🤷🏻‍♀️🌥

How is vocabulary relevant for you as a speaker and communicator?

First of all, don't go out and start using a bunch of big fancy words in your presentations.

🚫Never use language to distance yourself from your audience.🚫

But consider how you use vocabulary to express yourself in a way that's aligned with your personality, your speaking style and your intellectual property.

Are you still learning new ways of expressing yourself? Are you still building your vocabulary?

My favorite vocab-builder is the old-timey thesaurus (and I still love the dictionary), but I don't use it to find words or expressions that are not authentic to me. I use the thesaurus to find words that fit my communication style, but ones I haven't remembered or that express my idea better than the original word on my mind.

Of course, reading is always a great way of improving vocabulary, as well as actually using new words in context in conversation.

I know that the older I get, the more I lose vocabulary. I forget words I once knew because I'm not using them regularly or I haven't come across them in my reading.

I'd love to know if you are a 🤓word nerd🤓 or a 💝language lover!💝 Comment below. 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼

And my dad is doing great. He had a second stroke in the hospital, but sounds like his old self and will hopefully be going home tomorrow. We're having long conversations at his bedside, which I hope are helping his brain retain his words!

You will be judged

lisa@coachlisab.com (Lisa Braithwaite) — Thu, 22 Jul 2021 12:00:00 -0700

I haven't been completely honest with you.

I've been posting a lot lately about body positivity and age positivity because so many women hold themselves back from getting in front of an audience because of shame or embarrassment about their bodies and their appearance.

I've been telling you that you have to get out there anyway. And I stand by what I've said! But I've omitted something.

You may be lucky enough not to have any trolls or haters, but the truth is, others will judge you. This is really what lies at the root of avoiding public speaking. Avoiding judgment.

Whether your concern is losing your place, boring the audience, getting tongue-tied, or being unable to answer questions, these all come down to a fear of being judged.

Judged inadequate. Judged incompetent. Judged insufficient. Rejected.

And as much as I remind my clients that audiences want you to succeed, there is a legit reality here:

We're judging and critiquing people all the time.

We walk down the street noting what people are wearing, what they're saying, what they're holding, what they're doing. We notice, we filter, and then we move on.

We do this to determine lots of things, but mostly: Is this person like me? How much is this person LIKE me or DIFFERENT from me?

We're always subconsciously trying to figure out our relationship to others. Should I smile? Should I be threatened? Is he trustworthy? Does she want something from me? Can I connect with him?

We're social animals. Pack animals. Herd animals. We rely on the herd for our survival, so in a sense, we're like any suspicious and wary animal. Yes, we are like dogs sniffing butts.

So you ARE being judged. But not in the way you think. The audience is trying to determine their relationship with you. Can they trust you? Will you listen to them and understand where they're coming from? Is this relationship worth their time and money?

Your job on stage is to connect, relate, serve and deliver.

You don't have to be LIKE your audience to do so. but you do have to honor what the audience needs, wants, and cares about. Your words have to be consistent and aligned with your actions and emotions. You have to be sincere, authentic, and focused on serving the audience.

If you make a mistake, this doesn't damage your relationship with the audience. They won't judge you for forgetting what you were saying or having an equipment snafu. It's not the technicalities that interfere with your relationship.

What DOES damage your relationship with the audience is lack of connection, lack of understanding of who they are and what they want, not putting in the time to provide an excellent experience, and overly anxious concern for your own well-being.

When you get past that, nothing can scare you anymore.