I was. Last winter, I promised myself that I would go to the Authentic Movement workshop that’s happening there this weekend. Matthew and Xander were going to come too (to Portland, not the workshop). Friends of ours were going to come along for the trip. It was going to be an awesome vacation and, for me, a big, splashy return to the world of dancing with new people and learning new things “out there.”

And then life happened.

My husband left his office job (and his regular paycheque). We cut expenses drastically. I started actually doing all the business-y stuff I talked about doing before he left the office.

And then it was the end of April, and there was just no way in hell it was happening.

So, there it is. The Authentic Movement workshop will happen (technically, it’s happening right now, since there was a Friday night session), without me.

But you know what? That’s OK.

It would have been a really cool experience. But it would have cost well over $1000 (probably $1500 or higher) between transportation and accommodation and everything else. And, frankly, I would rather take that money and use it to cover bills and buy myself some time in which I can focus completely on building my business. I’ve already started, and it’s been fabulous.

Plus, there are a lot of opportunities right here.

Next weekend there’s a Barefoot Ecstatic Dance (which I’ve meant to go to since Xander turned 2, and STILL haven’t made it to). There’s also an open house at a local yoga studio, and that means free yoga classes (which I’ve meant to go to since Xander turned 2 and STILL haven’t made it to). And the weekend after next, there’s a contact improv workshop at the studio space where I teach DansKinetics (the idea of going terrifies me, but in that good “walking my edge” kind of way).

I can go to all three for $25, plus bus/cab fare if necessary. I’ll be walking my edge, challenging myself in the best possible way. And I’ll be making connections and learning and growing in the community where I live. There’s something to be said for that.

Growing...breaking through walls...

I feel like I had to not-go to the workshop in Maine in order to truly appreciate all the possibilities there are right here. I’ll be keeping my eyes open from now on, making an effort to get out to events and experience new things here in Halifax…and I’ll let you know how it goes.

I’m looking forward to having new movement experiences to blog about

Not the “You’re this sign and therefore this exact thing will happen to you today/this week” ones in the magazines and newspapers, anyway.

But I do believe in astrology. I believe that the position of the stars and planets affects us.

I’m also fascinated by the cycle of moons and the wheel of the year, which I’ve been learning about this year

This stuff? Oh yes, I completely believe in it.

And I believe that the way the stars and planets aligned at our birth has an impact on our personality. I think it’s more complicated than your main sign, though…have you read your birth chart lately? A lot of mine is scarily accurate.

So, while I don’t believe what the magazines tell me about my future (can all Libras really have an unlucky/lucky day on the exact same day? And why do they keep telling me I’ll meet someone new when I’m happily married?), I do believe that my sign has a lot to tell me about myself.

For example: Libra. Scales. Balance.

Or…majorly effing indecisive.

Yup, that one rings true.

And so does this one: Libra. Air sign. Mentally oriented and often caught up in thoughts…aka easily distracted and not the best at following through on said thoughts with concrete actions.

This is SO me. Case in point: tiny plate syndrome, where I get distracted by the multitude of possible projects before me and forget the biggest, scariest, most important one.

Other case in point: the fact that on Monday, while I was thinking about my blog and business, I was suddenly seized by the desire to start a brand new blog. NOOOOOO.

Always starting, rarely finishing. That’s my M.O. And that’s why last weekend’s telecircle was such a huge triumph for me…sometimes it feels like I’m struggling against my own nature when I actually FINISH something and make it real (boy, am I awesome at starting things, though!).

Last week Matthew (bless him) pointed out during one of my panicky Libra freakouts that my air-sign mind was busily hopping from thing to thing to thing, but I wasn’t actually finishing anything. Again. And we talked about things I could do to cut that crap out.

Here’s the truth: not getting things done feels crappy, especially when you’ve got an overflowing to-do list. I’d like productivity (actual, results-producing productivity as opposed to frantic busy-work that leads nowhere) to be something that happens every day, not when I’ve committed myself into a corner and am completely panicked.

So I started experimenting with techniques that could help. And it turned out that the magic combination was in my mental toolbox the entire time…I just hadn’t realized it.

Here’s Meg’s Magical Productivity Combo for air signs (or anyone who’s having trouble getting things done).

1. MicroMOVEments

Oh man, I’ve known about SARK’s anti-procrastination technique FOREVER, but it never really stuck for me. Making lists of tiny baby steps with deadlines kind of felt like a giant waste of my time and just another thing to do before I actually tried to do the things on my…to-do…list.

But I was so very, very wrong. MicroMOVEments (or at least their babystep cousins) are what got me organized for my class on Saturday. Instead of a crazy-making, procrastination-inducing list like this:

-Plan class
-Test Vokle
-Send final newsletter

I created a list that went like this:

Plan class:

•  Pick music
• Write initial plan
• Write detailed plan
• Finalize
• Practice

Test Vokle:

• Set up camera
• Test camera and sound
• Test speaking over music
• Test chat window

Send final newsletter:

• take Vokle screenshots
• schedule event and get link
• write newsletter, include link, playlist, screenshots, link to world clock
• test newsletter
• send newsletter

You get the idea. Each step, which was initially too large for me to wrap my head around and thus led to intense procrastination and distraction, was broken down into its constituent parts.

It was great, because that way I didn’t forget anything, and I had all the pieces of the puzzle written down in one place, ready to check off. AND (bonus) each task was fairly easy to achieve in a short-ish time period, so I could check more things off as I went. My airy brain LOVED this.

2. The Pomodoro Technique

OK, I admit it, I’ve only tried this for about 36 hours. But I already love it.

If you don’t know what the Pomodoro technique is, the basic principle is that you set a timer and work for 25 minutes, then take a 5 minute break. Repeat 4 times, and then take a longer break. Etc.

Jamie Ridler has mentioned it a few times, and she recommended it highly. And now I know why.

I think this is going to really work for me. 25 minutes is short enough that I can keep myself working (as opposed to, say, checking Facebook), but long enough that I can actually get something done. On Monday night I managed three 25-minute sessions, and I checked 4 things off my list! On Tuesday afternoon, I did 5 sessions and completed a whole PAGE of babysteps!

The combination is perfect for me. I can’t get over how productive I’ve been!

And here’s the best part:

I’ve been thinking about my airiness as something WRONG with me, but I finally see…this isn’t about needing to “fix” myself. Being an air sign isn’t better or worse than any other sign…it just IS. It’s time to accept that I’m easily distractible and that ideas come more naturally to me than follow through…and it’s time to create some systems to help me balance out the airiness.

I think I’m off to a good start!

What’s YOUR sign? Does it have anything to tell you about the way you work?

P.S. I’m collecting information to help me plan future telecircles! Want to help me? Click here to take the (super-short) survey

I did it.

After more than a year of “Oh no, I couldn’t possibly”-ing, a month of “I’ve announced this, now how the hell will I pull this off?”-ing and a week-long delay when the Universe had other plans…it’s done.

And it was lovely. The technology worked out, the plan came together, and my friend and I had a wonderful dance (thank you! <3). It actually happened! For real! It was incredible to know for that hour and a half that I was doing something that I had dismissed as impossible only months before.

As I danced the 45 minutes of free movement between the opening and closing of our circle…

…space opened up…the space in my heart and my brain where this dream had lived cleared out…and the Universe flowed in.

A dozen new ideas bloomed in the space left by this one…and I realized something important:

I’ve been quiet for a long time. Not that I haven’t written on my blog or spoken in person, but…I’ve held things back. I’ve been terrified that if I shared everything that I had to share, there would be nothing left. If I released my creations into the world, nothing would come to replace them. If I blogged every idea I had, I would run out of things to say.

So I held them back. I stored them for special occasions, or until I could “make them perfect” (which never happened). I got distracted by new projects before old ones were complete (more on this in an upcoming post). I hung on to never-started ideas because it was safer than trying.

But what came to me as I made this one dream real…was just how wrong that belief was. As I danced, things shifted in my mind, and possibilities blossomed. I took my next step into readiness.

And I thought…”I’m ready to DO this. I’m can share what I create, and there will always be more where that came from.”

So here I am…I’m sharing. (It still feels a little scary, but I’m doing it anyway)

I have a gift for you

Spirit Moves Dance – The Dance of Breath

This is my first-ever moving meditation. I created it about a month ago, and I was too afraid to tell you. I’m not afraid anymore

(It’s a link to the mp3, so you should be able to right-click to download…help yourself, it’s yours for free, and if you like it, please spread the word. This is my thank you to you for reading my words and sharing my space…I love so much that we can connect this way and that I can share with you)

There are more where that came from. There are more telecircles too. And there are projects I haven’t even thought of yet. I understand now…I have to make them real and let them go, and then the Universe will flow into the space left behind. I will grow, and I will be able to create new things.

There is infinite possibility…just so long as I don’t hold back.

…I’m ready to let the Universe in and see what happens…

Beautiful Angel at My Mosaic Life posted a few days ago about wanting what she wants, and what her true, heartfelt desires are.

You should go read it, because it’s fabulous.

And it got me thinking…what do I want? What are MY true desires?

Desire can be a tough feeling. I know that for me, it’s accompanied with a “but I don’t really need that, it’s not important” or “but I totally can’t afford it and it’s silly to still be harping on it.” There’s pain along with the wanting, because there’s a belief that what I want is unrealistic and selfish, and sometimes impossible (short of a winning lottery ticket). That’s how it is for me, anyway, and I get the feeling I’m not alone here.

But Angel has inspired me, and I’m going to write and share a list of the things I truly want. I’ll leave it here for you to see, and I won’t add any “but I totally can’t afford that”s or “maybe when the kid is older”s, for once.

Here are my true and heartfelt desires:

-I want to actually go out and do the things I’ve been half-heartedly planning and then putting off. These include, but are not limited to, going to the monthly Barefoot Ecstatic Dance gathering downtown, seeing local dance performances, trying Nia, and taking a yoga class.

-I want to go to the Nia White Belt training in New Glasgow next month. If not that one, a different one sometime this year. I don’t know if I want to *teach* Nia, but I’ve read the book, and I want to experience their philosophy of movement firsthand.

-While we’re on the topic, I want to go to a 5Rhythms workshop, an authentic movement workshop, an advanced DansKinetics training, and a drumming/dancing circle.

-Basically, I want to have a whole spectrum of healing dance techniques that I can teach and/or combine and draw from. I want to play and explore and keep learning. There’s so much out there that I haven’t experienced.

-I want to play Minecraft and hang out with my friends regularly, without feeling guilty for “wasting my time” not-working.

-I want to cuddle and connect with Matthew every night. We got away from that since Xander was born, and we’re only just noticing the different it makes when we do it.

-I want time to sit quietly and just be still, even for 5 minutes, every day

-I want to choreograph again, and to perform my own choreography. I used to be really really good. I miss it SO MUCH.

-I want some new, brightly-coloured shirts to wear when I dance and teach classes. My black shirts are really nice, but I’d rather be in colour.

-I want a house with a yard. I want one that’s actually ours, and not rented. I want a vegetable garden and a swingset in the backyard, and I want a big room to dance in, a nice kitchen, and some office space. And a woodstove…just because. I want it to feel 100% Us and 100% Home.

-I want a daily yoga and dance practice. I want to feel strong and trust my body again. I’m feeling a difference after only 2 weeks of teaching DansKinetics, but it makes me want MORE MORE MORE!

-I want to earn money from home. I want to build TWO businesses: my dance business, and an editing business. Did you know I officially edited two versions of a real live book? I did! I totally rocked it! I love helping people polish their writing so that it clearly communicates their message…LOVE it. I also love working with people to help clarify just what they’re trying to say. (So if you need an editor, or know of someone who does…you know who to contact )

-Someday, I want to be a coach/counsellor and combine that with movement. I don’t know exactly what to do or how, but I do know that when I help my friends untangle a problem and get some perspective, I feel immensely satisfied.

And finally,

-I want to totally rock my telecircle next weekend and be able to build something really cool and unique with them.

There. That’s what I want.

How about you? I’d love to know! You can share it in comments, on your own blog, or on Angel’s original post. <3

And that’s where it stopped.

On Monday night I noticed that my throat was scratchy. On Tuesday, when I launched my 8-week session of DansKinetics classes at DANSpace (hint hint: you should come and dance with me!), I was in the process of losing my voice. By the time I got home that night it was official: I was sick.

It wasn’t my ordinary cold. For the past 5 years at least, my colds have followed a precise pattern: start in the head with 2 days of abject misery, move to the chest, feel better. This one? This one started in the chest and then migrated up, wiping me out completely for 3 days and not slacking off until Day 4. So. Much. Fun.

Instead of my lovely week of working and planning, I found myself slumped miserably on the sofa, watching movies with Xander, and even taking a daily afternoon nap (this never happens). I couldn’t walk from one end of the apartment to the other without having to lie down afterwards.

I started getting suspicious right around Day 2. I mean, I know the scientific mechanics of cold-catching, but I am absolutely convinced that illnesses come for a reason. And this one, this weird and oddly-timed cold? Definitely not random.

As I lay on the sofa, I thought a lot about Why This Happened. And the longer I lay there, the more insight I had about it. The way I see it, this cold came around for two reasons:

1. I wasn’t taking care of myself.
I’ve been staying up too late, working too much, not taking time to play or be still (this was made very clear over the course of my sofa-time…I’d forgotten what it felt like to sit for more than an hour without doing something).

It’s the usual story, and that’s why it’s my go-to theory when I get sick. My body decided that, if I wasn’t going to cut it out voluntarily, it would make me be still and look after myself…hence the 3 days on the sofa (and even now I’m not 100%…I had to lie down for half an hour this afternoon!)

2. My brand-new blinding-light epiphany: I was off-centre, and it was throwing everything off. In fact, I had been off-centre and floundering for so long that it had stopped feeling bad and started feeling normal.  This cold came to show me the truth.

I haven’t been fully living my life. Not walking my talk. Not living my message. Getting stuck in ruts of habit and resistance. Business-wise, not doing the biggest things on my lists. Meaning to do them and then getting bogged down in avoidance and perfectionism (which are both just fancy names for not doing something out of fear). Hanging back and stressing out and checking Facebook instead of moving through my to-do lists. Forgetting why I was doing the work in the first place. Letting myself and my dreams down.

That sounds like I’m berating myself for it, and I’m really not. I could feel that something was wrong, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. I don’t think off-centeredness registered consciously before last week because, really, I’ve been doing so much better than I was last year or the year before that (and don’t get me started on my first year as a mama). But I don’t feel good…and besides, better isn’t the same as full-colour-awesome. Now that I can see the difference, it’s time to make a change.

A lot of the “walking my talk” things I’ve been neglecting are self-care: Reiki. Meditation. Watching dance performance. Reading actual books. Moving my body regularly in the ways I teach and write about. Doing the work that’s most important to me instead of skirting the edges and making busy-work (and then getting worn ragged and stressed out and sick). These are all things that would make my mama-job easier and help me follow my passion. These aren’t things to “not have time for,” or to forget about or to avoid.

I knew vaguely that I was doing that before this cold, but I didn’t realize the full extent of the problem until I was forced to stop working altogether. I needed the week of misery in order to get perspective on the months that came before.

My Reiki Master taught us a saying during one of our attunement workshops: when she’s going through a major healing crisis, be it a physical illness or an emotional rollercoaster, she says “Thank you for my healing.” No matter the situation, she says “Thank you for my healing.” (Sometimes she shouts it and shakes her fist at the Universe )

Now that I’m getting better, that phrase sums up my feelings exactly. Last week didn’t go AT ALL how I planned. Being sick sucked a LOT, and I was so disappointed about not being able to do the things I’d planned, but now I can see the necessity of the week on the sofa. I appreciate the insights I gained from the change in plans.

Now I get to decide how I want to proceed from here.

Thank you for my healing.

I don’t know how this started. I mean, last year we said that my office was going to be in the guest room. During the World-Changing Writing Workshop, I participated in a whole teleclass about creating office space to support me in my creative work. I tried. It’s just…I don’t know…it didn’t really “take.” It was a guest room with a wobbly desk in it, not a space for magic.

And after a few months, the guest room became the Place Where Things Go to Die. Then it really REALLY wasn’t conducive to working…or doing anything, really, other than Dumping Stuff and Running Away. The cats liked it. That’s about it.

Last weekend Matthew and I decided that Enough was Enough. It was time to make some space. We started by clearing out the guest room.

(I purposely didn't take "before" photos of the Hell Hole, but here—including that shopping cart and its contents—is about 3/4 of the stuff we cleared out of the room, not including furniture. Or the contents of the closet. Yeah...)

We rearranged everything, and spent about an hour scraping cat hair off the rug where under-the-bed used to be. And then it was time to settle back in.

At this point, Xander decided to come and help us put things away. This was his contribution...

I worked until bedtime on Saturday, sorting papers, organizing things, and putting pictures back up. I even reorganized most of the closet, but I didn’t photograph it because it still looks messy.

And here is the result:

Bookshelf. Business-y stuff on the right, crafty and household stuff on the left.

Actual space for pretty things! Matthew bought me that rabbit sculpture on the day we had Xander <3

Prayer flags from Goddess Leonie, standing work station, which I use about half the time, and you can *just* see part of my Right-Brain business plan by the blue curtain on the right.

Xander's standing workstation...he's "playing Minecraft" on the alarm clock.

I LOVE how it looks. It feels so much better.

But here’s the Magical Secret: this was about SO MUCH MORE than spring cleaning the guest room.

To be honest, the mess in the guest room kind of felt like a metaphor for my approach to my blog-and-business-y stuff. I had plans and projects to do, but they kept getting crowded out of the way by random crap. Papers. Lego. Facebook. Massive life changes. Hairballs…no, wait, that was the guest room, not the blog. As far as I know… 

The point is that my dreams were drowning in random pieces of crap that needed to be cleared out and put away. I needed time and space for action.

Last night I tried the office out for the first time, and this afternoon Matthew gave me a block of time to work as well. So far in this office, I have edited an e-book (not mine), recorded a movement meditation (that one’s mine, and more on that soon), created the beginnings of a new website (MegGoodmanson.com…it’s still a work in progress), and danced for half an hour.

…Most of which I’d been planning to do for the past month or more. Clearing the guest room and making physical space for my work is allowing me to clear out my back-logged to-do list and make energetic space for more creativity and bigger projects.

YES.

This is my magic room, my business sanctuary, the place where Creations Will Be Made Real. I’ve only been in here for a couple of days, but I pretty much never want to leave.

SO HAPPY in my office space...and the cats seem happier too!

We’re going to have to find somewhere else to keep the shopping cart…

When Marsha sent me this piece, I had to smile. It took me back more than a decade.

Long, long ago, when we were teenagers (I think…I’m bad with chronology), Marsha and I were both training intensively in our chosen art forms. She practiced increasingly complex and beautiful pieces of music on the piano, and I practiced increasingly complex and beautiful steps in ballet class.

And when we hung out at her house, we had a ritual of going into the play room where the piano was. She would play through her pieces, and I would stand in the small rectangle of open space behind her and dance. I’ve lost a lot of memories from my childhood, but this one remains a treasured favourite.

Marsha went home over Easter weekend, and she recorded this piece on the very same piano she used to play on when we’d dance and play together. And this video is my response.

I call this piece “Muscle Memory” because I started out with the idea of doing a very “balletic” dance (and you can see how the dance begins and ends that way). I wanted to see if I could still capture the essence and feeling of the dances I used to do in the play room, having not taken a ballet class in 8 years.

I think I managed it…but it wasn’t very comfortable (physically as well as emotionally—the inside of my right knee did NOT enjoy my attempts at turnout). And I couldn’t sustain it for the whole piece. I still like the end result, though. It’s more Meg-now than Meg-then, but it still, I hope, pays homage to the young girls in the play room.

Thank you, Marsha, for a beautiful piece, and for the great memories. <3

I don’t mean that in an “I’ve had a crazy awesome epiphany way” (for once). I mean it literally. Last week my life as I’ve known it for the past 4 years…changed.

I went back to work.

People who don’t know me personally probably need some backstory here: For the past few years, my husband has been working at a computer game company (he’s an insanely talented artist..do a Google image search for “Matthew Goodmanson art” sometime and see what I mean). But at the end of March he left his regular office job to work from home on a contract basis.

He needed a break from work, and I (I hate to admit this) needed a break from full-time Mama-ing, so we agreed that he would stay home with Xander and I would go back to working temp assignments like I did when I was pregnant.

I started my first assignment on Wednesday. And it was FAR more difficult than I’d expected.

The work itself wasn’t much more difficult than I had expected (although I had to learn a TON that first day). It’s the emotional strain I hadn’t considered. You don’t even want to know how much I cried that first day. I cried when Matthew and Xander dropped me off, I broke down sobbing on my cell phone at lunch, I cried after work, and I cried before bed. I don’t know if anyone noticed, but I actually cried a little bit during work as well.

I wasn’t just crying because I missed my kid (I did) or that the work was intimidating (it was). In hindsight, I think I was crying because I didn’t know how to process what was happening. It was the biggest change I’d been through since I became a mama—which, incidentally, made me cry in exactly the same way for a number of weeks. It felt huge and scary, and I didn’t know how to handle it.

Things got better. No more crying after that first day. But the tears have been replaced with…I don’t know…malaise. Something’s shifted since the last time I did this. I can’t really explain it in any way other than saying that I feel exactly the way your feet feel when you’ve been wearing sneakers and flats for years and then try to go out in heels. I’m trying to be a person I’m not, wearing a costume (because what is “business attire” if not a costume?) so I can fit in. I feel wobbly and uncomfortable and all wrong. I feel like I’m from another planet or something. I don’t like the way this feels AT ALL.

I don’t remember feeling this way before. And I can’t tell if this is growing pains or something more permanent. I think that I assumed that when I went back to work, things would go back to the way they were when I was pregnant and temping, that I would settle into the rhythm and be 100% OK with everything. And maybe I will…I’m only 3 days in, after all, and I’ve been at home for almost 4 years…it just doesn’t feel like it’ll be OK from here. And I don’t know if I want it to be…

I’m in SUCH a weird space right now…off-balance, adjusting, while simultaneously feeling like I don’t WANT to adjust. I’m trying to remember that I’m not in this forever, that things will sort themselves out, that I can still be ME and work toward my dreams even when I’m working an office job (lots of people do it, right?!).

There are some good things. I’m finding that my priorities are clarifying in the face of this change. I’m learning that when I’m at home, I need to do my Right Work with super-intense focus and efficiency, or it doesn’t get done at all. This would be why you barely heard from me last week (it’s a learning process) but I assume that (eventually) learning to do my work efficiently and intensely will be a good thing in the end. And I’m cherishing every minute with Xander, even when I end up being the puke-catcher and cleaner-upper all weekend (he caught a tummy bug…blech).

I’m struggling to regain my balance in the middle of a whirlwind of change.  I don’t have a solution or a Grand Plan or anything really conclusive yet. But I can tell you this: here and now I make a commitment—

~to hang on to my dreams with both hands

~to make use of every moment I have

~to work with laser intensity and rest/play with equal intensity when I’m done

~to dance as much as I can

~to keep an eye open for opportunities

~to remember that this change will help me get where I need to go, even if it’s just by shaking things up and reminding me of what’s important.

And what’s most important to me is this:

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EOYxQ0znZN4)

If you’ve been reading from the beginning of my blogging adventure, you’ll remember that just over a year ago I tried out a dance class called JourneyDance.  It. Was. Awesome. And it was a pivotal moment for me, dancing outside of my living room for the first time since I had Xander, and remembering just why I wanted to DO this.

Michelle is awesome. She’s a fun and inspiring teacher, and she’s got a dancing story that will rock your socks. Here’s what Michelle had to say:

1. Tell us about yourself!

After 15 years in corporate public relations, I feel so blessed to have found my passion and the courage to leave an unfulfilling career and pursue more meaningful work. I am currently enrolled in the Institute for Integrative Nutrition studying health coaching and I look forward to inspiring others to make healthy, natural choices so they can live long, healthy, and joyful lives.

My journey began almost three years ago while I was on retreat at the Kripalu Centre for Yoga and Health with Tama Kieves in her program Unleashing Your Calling: Finding the Work and Life you Love. Since then I have done a lot of soul searching to uncover what my true passions are. Along the way I discovered JourneyDance and fell in love with the practice. I have completed teacher training and am now offering classes in the Halifax and surrounding areas.

I am a lifelong seeker of authenticity and an avid yoga practitioner for over 12 years; I am passionate about living from the heart and encouraging others to find their truths. I believe in the transformational power of movement and plant-based, whole-foods. I live by the ocean with my husband and two cats.

2. What is JourneyDance^TM?

JourneyDance^TM is a holistic fitness practice that tones your body as you sweat away toxins while having a ton of fun! No fancy footwork or complicated choreographies, JourneyDance offers simple movement suggestions and imagery to help you explore your own unique way of moving. There is no right or wrong just authentic letting go as we dance barefoot through the chakras to inspiring world music.

3. How did you discover this kind of dancing?

I first experienced conscious dance while on retreat at Kripalu in 2009. Every day at lunch time they offer a movement class. Being open to new experiences and making the most of my time there, I eagerly attended and participated in a couple yoga dance classes. But it wasn’t until day three, during Toni Bergin’s JourneyDance class, when I really felt the transformational power of movement.

4. What do you love most about JourneyDance?

As a young girl I was very active in many forms of movement including figure skating, gymnastics, tap and jazz dancing. But as I grew up and became interested in other activities I lost touch with these forms of expression. They became buried beneath the expectations of life, the social norms, the drive for a career, money, relationships.  But I always felt that little girl deep inside of me bursting at the seams to be free to dance, sing, laugh, play and soar. And that day in Toni’s JourneyDance class she did. It was at that moment, with tears streaming down my face, I knew something had shifted inside of me. I had found my passion.

5. How has JourneyDance affected your life?

JourneyDance has really transformed my life. Through the teacher training process, I learned so much about myself and peeled back so many layers to start uncovering my authentic truth. Through the practice I gained the courage to leave an unfulfilling career, found my passions and am now the happiest and healthiest I have ever been in my life. Each week on the dance floor I continue to release and let go even more and continue to get closer to the real me.

It has also provided me with an outlet to give back, to inspire, to reach out and touch people’s lives. To witness others letting go and experiencing the freedom found within the practice is truly a gift.

6. What’s the next step on your journey? 

The next step, or the one I continue to work on with JourneyDance, is to build more awareness and educate about what it is and its benefits and find new venues and audiences to share it with. Otherwise in my life, the next big leap will be to launch my health coaching practice later this year.

7. Where can people find you (online and in class)?

You can find me on Facebook at JourneyDance Maritimes and on Twitter @mmhealthcoach and this summer my coaching website will launch www.michelle-maclean.com

I teach JourneyDance every Tuesday from 12:10-1:00 pm at Halifax Yoga. Every second Saturday from 10:30-11:45 I’m at Trena’s Dance Studio in Bedford. And on the second Sunday of the month, we’re grooving at the Prospect Road Community Center from 3:00-4:30 pm.

Thanks so much for sharing your story, Michelle!

If you’re in the Halifax area, I highly recommend Michelle’s classes. And if you live elsewhere, you can find listings of JourneyDance teachers here.

Launching my Big New Things this week really put me over the top.

I’m exhausted.

So today, instead of posting a dance video, I’m giving myself permission…

Permission to rest.

Permission to relax.

Permission to stop striving.

Permission to just be.

Permission to read something non-business related.

Permission to CHILL OUT for a few days.

Because, here’s the thing:

The world won’t stop turning if I go to bed early instead of working. Life as I know it won’t end if I spent a few days resting. And if I really want to create a joyful, soulful business, then I need to be 100% me when I’m creating it, and not some strung-out, zombie-brained, droopy-eyed mess of exhaustion.

...kind of like this.

In spite of all of my reading and journalling and chatting and posting about self-care, I’m still driven to push push push. Suffering under the burden of Never Enough. But practice is what counts, I hear, and this weekend I resolve to practice:

Practice resting.

Practice relaxing.

Practice doing things on a whim.

Practice being light.

Practice being easy.

Practice flowing.

Practice self-care.

Want to practice with me? What will you be doing this weekend to care for yourself? What will you give yourself permission to do?

(I’ll be back on Monday to see how it went!)