Stages of Drudgery and Triumph

I couldn't have said it any better: Introducing Jay Smooth from illdoctrine.com

2009-08-26T15:04:00.000-07:00

I only found Jay Smooth today, by chance, somehow, while I was cruising YouTube looking for an old Jello Ad. Is that roundabout enough for you? Anyway...

I've been feeling really badly about not keeping the blog updated and wanting to tell you why I haven't been blogging, but since Jay said it better than I could if I tried, I'll just let him do the talking:

And, by the way, I'm going to beat the Little Hater and start posting again soon. So, please, keep the faith by checking back soon or save yourself the trouble and become a follower. Thanks.

Wrote this in 1984...when Michael was still King

2009-06-26T19:32:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd republish this post given Michael's death yesterday. Wow. He was only 50 years old. What a shame that he didn't get a chance to redeem himself before he passed. I think in his death we all realize just how judgmental we've been, how we love to create and then destroy our heroes, and how much we still truly love his music.

I know I did. Way back then, and even now. So, here you go. Enjoy....

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This little ditty was written in 1984. Thanks goes out to my fabulous and brilliant mother for having the foresight and humor to save it.

**Grammar and punctuation errors are intentional. Do notice that there aren't that many of them as I have always been a stickler for commas. It's an unfortunate talent, I know.**

“Katrina: A Modernized Cinderella”

Once upon a weekend, Katrina, a girl who had to do all of her step-mother and step-sisters’ work, was, of course, doing chores. She heard her step-sisters and step-mother talking. They said,

“Mother read it to us,” said Brooke.

“Please, mother,” said Victoria.

“Quiet and I will,” said Ms. Rivers, “It says:

“Please, come to my party, I will be selecting a wife. It’s at my mansion on March 29, 1984 at 8:00 P.M. to 2:30 A.M. Hope to see ya!
R.S.V.P. 642-4235 or MICHAEL

Sincerely,

Michael Jackson

P.S. Dress casually.”

Brooke and Victoria screamed and then started scrambling around trying to get everything just right for M.J.. Katrina had to help everyone, but herself, and she didn’t get to go. Katrina was very, very sad because she liked Michael Jackson very much.

When she was sitting, sulking someone appeared to her and said “I’m your fairy Godmother. Do you want to go to Michael’s party?”

“Yes, oh yes. I would love it!” Katrina said.

“Okay, then go get four hamsters, one dog and a pumpkin.”

“Okay,” said Katrina and she went off and got everything. When she got back Mrs. Express (that was the name of her fairy Godmother) turned the hamsters into four wheels, the dog into a chauffer and the pumpkin into a limousine. Then she turned Katrina’s work clothes into the most fashionable threads around and her shoes into some pumps. She went to the party and had a total blast with Michael. She remembered what Mrs. Express had told her, to be home at 2:00 A.M., at 2:00 A.M. and the clock chimed and she ran from the mansion. Michael couldn’t catch her. When she got home the magic had worn off and everything was back to normal except her shoes. She noticed one was missing. So she took off the one she had.

The next day a man came around and he checked everyone to see if they fit into the shoe that Michael had picked up after the party. When it came to Katrina’s house she was the one that fit into the shoe. Michael then asked her hand in marriage and Katrina said, “Yes.”

On May 1, 1984, Michael Jackson and Katrina Elder were pronounced married. They lived happily from then to eternity.

2009-05-12T19:59:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about Happiness lately, and thanks to my friend, Justine, I ran across this video posted on The Atlantic.

It's strange, the recent past has been one of the hardest transitions of my life and yet, for the most part, I find myself really happy. I'm not crazy about where I live or the work I've been doing lately, but somehow, it doesn't matter. I think it may have something to do with the fact that on February 25, 2009 I got married to the most amazing person ever, someone whom I trust implicitly and respect greatly.

I've also come to realize Happiness comes when you learn to shift your focus outward. I mean, come on people, take stock! Look at everything we've got. It's an amazing world we live in. Trust me, you'll feel a lot better if you do.

My New Home: Madison Square Park

2008-10-11T14:43:00.000-07:00

I'm worried. Worried about the economy. Worried about my choice to live here. Worried about where I will live.

Worry no more!

I had no idea that one could live in a tree in New York, but yea! it's possible. Unfortunately, there is no indoor plumbing. But, where there's a will there's a way.

5 Friends

2008-10-02T06:19:00.000-07:00

Yeah, it's important. You gotta use it, or you'll lose it! Please, I beg of you: Register and VOTE!

We Are the Ones

2008-09-25T14:58:00.000-07:00

This gives me chills every time. Please share this with everyone you know. Again. It's important, and it's beautiful.

The Miniature Earth

2008-09-24T05:54:00.001-07:00

Kinda puts things into perspective, huh? Let us rejoice for what we have and find it in our hearts to share the wealth.

Bryant Park: Who knew it was a Hot Spot?

2008-09-19T09:19:00.000-07:00

I just had to take a moment to upload a picture and tell you how much I'm enjoying New York. I have a free night tonight, so I'm going to write a more detailed account of how my first week living in New York has been. Suffice to say, I am absolutely LOVING it!

Tina does Sarah

2008-09-14T09:00:00.000-07:00

How could I not share this? It's a work of art. True genius.

Oops, My Bad

2008-09-08T23:59:00.000-07:00

Check out "Oops, My Bad". One part travel journal, two parts paranoia, this article is my latest contribution to WalkaboutJones.com. There you can read about how getting a simple buzzing sound fixed on my computer almost resulted in personal and financial ruin. Or, did it? You can find out at WALKABOUTJONES.com....GO THERE.

My Vagabond Shoes Are Longing to Stray

2008-09-04T15:31:00.000-07:00

After dreaming about it since I saw my very first Woody Allen film ("Hannah and Her Sisters" 1986), I've finally decided to just do it. That's right people:

I'M MOVING TO NEW YORK!

I'm excited and thrilled. I'm nervous and nauseous. But, I can't wait. I'm leaving lovely Los Angeles on September 10th, and I'll be blogging about it, of course. So, please either bookmark or subscribe to "The Stages of Drudgery and Triumph" because there are sure to be a lot of them.

Sit back, put your seat belt on, and get ready for the (vicarious) thrill ride of your life as I make the big move east!

Going All the Way

2008-08-13T16:22:00.000-07:00

"There are certain artists who go all the way."

"Like, Bob Dylan or van Gogh."

"Uh, you mean, like, the way Bob Dylan became a Christian or van Gogh cut off his ear?" I asked.

"Yeah, kinda, except Bob Dylan could go back to being a Jew. Van Gogh, on the other hand--"

I laughed because it was true. The fact of the matter is my friend, Tim was right. Certain artists -- the good ones, I contend -- do "go all the way". They seem crazy, but somewhere inside their crazy is the Truth.

Artists who are willing to dig down deep, dredge up the muck, then expose it to the rest of us, those are the good ones. We wink at them and call them crazy. Really, they're just like the rest of us, except they're willing to take the risks we won't take. We connect with them because they say what we are too afraid to say. We sign secret pacts with them agreeing they will take fall so we can live in the confines of safety.

Artists who "go all the way" say what we want to say, live the way we wish we could live, do what we wish we had the courage to do, and, in the end, they are our heroes.

And, we remain the unrecognized masses. But, that's okay. Just as long as we continue to support and submit to this agreement, we can go on being bank tellers and housewives, CEO's and street sweepers. They can go on being "crazy" Artists. Just so long as the Truth be told through artists like Bob Dylan and Vincent van Gogh, I'm okay with that.

I might even join the crazy parade someday.

This is Sungha Jung.

2008-08-12T16:29:00.000-07:00

His rendition of U2's "With or Without You" nearly brings me to tears. I feel blessed to be able to hear him play.

Thank God for music and art. They transcend all of our perceived barriers and remind me there are very few differences between us, but we remain unique nonetheless.

Your Signature is More Powerful Than You Think.

2008-04-13T11:18:00.000-07:00

In response to "Gimme...Gimme" a piece I wrote for WalkaboutJones.com about the frustration I feel when I am accosted by those "clipboard-wielding guilt mongers" that hang-out in front of Whole Foods, I give you this Amnesty International video, originally shared with me by Alison Quinn.

For all of you who read the piece, thank you.

By the way, it's not that I don't care about the causes I listed. It's that I don't like being made to feel guilty if I don't want to stop to sign a petition before or after shopping.

Also, I believe strongly that one should research the cause before just willy-nilly signing a petition. That's why I often pass on the opportunity to put my signature on petitions outside of grocery stores, etc. I do, on the other hand, often go to websites made specifically for signature gathering, check out the causes, research them, then put my signature on petitions I feel I agree with. It takes more time, but that's just the way I operate.

To put your signature on a petition just to muzzle the petition circulator who asked you for it, to get home to your dinner is, in my not-so-humble opinion, not a responsible way of using your signature for change.

Gimme...Gimme

2008-04-13T00:00:00.000-07:00

Please take a moment to read "Gimme...Gimme" a post I wrote for my friend Dann Halem's website WalkaboutJones.com. Then, stay to check out the rest of the site. Thanks!

Resident Tourist

2008-04-03T18:21:00.000-07:00

The feeling has been with me for as long as I can remember. I just never had a name for it. I was reminded of it when I read an article in the New York Times about the similarities of Brooklyn and the East Bay. At the end of the article there was a quote from Danny Hoch:

“What I see as the reason for so many [New Yorkers] having come to the Bay, and so many Bay folk moving to [Brooklyn] (tens of thousands literally) is that each group has become accustomed to the alienation or perceived impossibility of staying where they are...Although I think each side sees the other as an amazing place to live and spend time, neither sees it as a place to actually stay forever. Both are nostalgic for home.

“Each becomes the new ‘resident tourist’."

Resident Tourist? Yikes.

Someone put a moniker on the vast droves of people like me who just can't seem to sit still. People who keep the moving boxes tucked away in the back of the closet so as to avoid those embarrassing trips to grocery store dumpsters before the next new address. People who have forever been penciled into the address books of their friends and family.

In fact, I've had so many addresses in my life that I have actually forgotten some of them. Seriously. Within LA alone, I've had seven addresses in ten and a half years, and that doesn't count the addresses I had while working on location (if you're keeping track, add five more).

At this point, I have Uhaul on speed dial. (If I get my frequent customer card stamped one more time, they're going to throw in free wardrobe boxes. Yea!)

What the hell is up with my serious lack of roots? Why can't I bring myself to hang pictures on the walls and unload the dozen or so boxes that are in my closets? Why do I have one foot out the door constantly?

Is this indicative of a strong desire to see the world or the "perceived impossibility of staying where [I am]"?

Either way, I've already got my sights set on New York. I don't know about Brooklyn, though. I hear the new hot spot is Astoria.

The immigration debate just got a little funnier

2008-03-28T12:45:00.000-07:00

Speaking of Moonwalking...

2008-03-25T19:01:00.000-07:00

This little ditty was written in 1984. Thanks goes out to my fabulous and brilliant mother for having the foresight and humor to save it.

**Grammar and punctuation errors are intentional. Do notice that there aren't that many of them as I have always been a stickler for commas. It's an unfortunate talent, I know.**

“Katrina: A Modernized Cinderella”

Once upon a weekend, Katrina, a girl who had to do all of her step-mother and step-sisters’ work, was, of course, doing chores. She heard her step-sisters and step-mother talking. They said,

“Mother read it to us,” said Brooke.

“Please, mother,” said Victoria.

“Quiet and I will,” said Ms. Rivers, “It says:

“Please, come to my party, I will be selecting a wife. It’s at my mansion on March 29, 1984 at 8:00 P.M. to 2:30 A.M. Hope to see ya!
R.S.V.P. 642-4235 or MICHAEL

Sincerely,

Michael Jackson

P.S. Dress casually.”

Brooke and Victoria screamed and then started scrambling around trying to get everything just right for M.J.. Katrina had to help everyone, but herself, and she didn’t get to go. Katrina was very, very sad because she liked Michael Jackson very much.

When she was sitting, sulking someone appeared to her and said “I’m your fairy Godmother. Do you want to go to Michael’s party?”

“Yes, oh yes. I would love it!” Katrina said.

“Okay, then go get four hamsters, one dog and a pumpkin.”

“Okay,” said Katrina and she went off and got everything. When she got back Mrs. Express (that was the name of her fairy Godmother) turned the hamsters into four wheels, the dog into a chauffer and the pumpkin into a limousine. Then she turned Katrina’s work clothes into the most fashionable threads around and her shoes into some pumps. She went to the party and had a total blast with Michael. She remembered what Mrs. Express had told her, to be home at 2:00 A.M., at 2:00 A.M. and the clock chimed and she ran from the mansion. Michael couldn’t catch her. When she got home the magic had worn off and everything was back to normal except her shoes. She noticed one was missing. So she took off the one she had.

The next day a man came around and he checked everyone to see if they fit into the shoe that Michael had picked up after the party. When it came to Katrina’s house she was the one that fit into the shoe. Michael then asked her hand in marriage and Katrina said, “Yes.”

On May 1, 1984, Michael Jackson and Katrina Elder were pronounced married. They lived happily from then to eternity.

What's Moonwalking Through Your Playing Field?

2008-03-21T23:59:00.000-07:00

Ha! Hilarious. Rewind.

How could I have missed it? A bear? A moonwalking bear? Haha...Huh?

HOLY SHIT! There's a moonwalking bear. Right there.

No way! Rewind it again, but from the real beginning, not the filmmaker's fake rewind.

Holy crap. I totally missed it. I really missed a friggin' moonwalking bear cruising through the middle of the playing field. That's crazy. Crazy funny. Right?

Right?

You're probably thinking, "Who cares? So what. It's a stupid parlor trick, no more interesting or savvy than getting duped in a game of Three Card Monte."

But, what if it is more significant? What if the real reason why this public service announcement has been viewed on YouTube almost a million times in the past couple of weeks is because there is something about it that is unnerving us, shaking us from our stupor?

Think about this video metaphorically. What does the bear represent to you? What large, looming presence is moonwalking its way through your playing field? What are you focused on while it's cruising through, unnoticed?

As I ponder those same questions, I am horrified by the notion that it is impossible to escape the trap that this clip utilizes: the inability for the human mind to focus on more than one thing at a time. It is especially disturbing because I can think of many times in my life when I have found comfort in that very same notion.

In fact, in learning how to meditate, my teacher said to me, "If you should find your mind fixating on something during your meditation, gently shift your focus to something outside of your mind, like the sound of the room or the sensations of the body, and soon you will find yourself back in the meditative state."

This teaching was for me life-altering. For a person whose mind often fixates, I found the technique to be useful in and out of meditation. I was able release myself from the bondage of obsessive thoughts and behaviors. I was elated and relieved. It never occurred to me that there might be a more sinister way to use this information.

Of course, as I say this, a rush of examples too obvious to miss flood my mind.

How many times have we been distracted by scandal and celebrity gossip and missed enormously important world events? How many times have we let our vanity consume us while we ignored the depletion of the word's resources? How many times have we missed a loved one indicate to us, "I need your attention," while we worked late into the night?

I am guilty, too. I have been selfish, distracted, and vain, and I'm still not sure what to do about it. Since it is obvious to me now, for better or worse, that I can only put my attention on one thing at a time, I am overwhelmed by the vast choices that I have. I wonder where I should put my attention so that I can be most useful.

I suppose I will concentrate my efforts in areas where I believe my god-given talents will be best utilized, and I will continue to be grateful that I have choices and, perhaps, a bit more Awareness.

A Simple Test That You Will Undoubtedly Fail

2008-03-21T17:25:00.000-07:00

This simple test got me thinking about some pretty big ideas. Go ahead. Take the test:

Now, think about it. Really. Right now. Take a moment to ask yourself about the bigger implications of failing this simple test.

Go ahead. I'll give you a day. Then, we'll talk some more.

Not Asking for Too Much

2008-03-17T23:05:00.000-07:00

"Hurt" as covered by Johnny Cash, video directed by Mark Romanek

I'm not sure what to expect, but tomorrow I'll be meeting with Mark Romanek to talk to him about becoming his assistant. It's a job my friend, Mark Martin, had before, so over the years, I've heard a thing or two about said job.

A month or so ago, I wrote a mission statement of sorts, stating what it is that I want in terms of my next job. I wrote:

"To work in an environment that is supportive and joyous with a person who is acting as my mentor.

My mentor sees obstacle as opportunity, mentorship as a natural progression from one generation to the next, and 'work' as an extension of one's creative ability."

Then, after the job interview I had where I was left wondering how one lives off of $700 a week, I added:

"...that pays me far more than $700 per week for my services."

"Closer" song by Nine Inch Nails, video directed by Mark Romanek

As I sit here tonight on the eve of my interview, after having reviewed the bulk of Mr. Romanek's work, I am impressed with his visual style, I am convinced that I could learn quite a bit from a director like him, and I am hoping that he is a kind person who will see the value in working with me.

I am also confronted by some of my fears.

As I watched his work, I realized that there is still so much to learn. I am saddened by the fact that I have not contributed more, and wonder, quite frankly, if I have what it takes to ever make a contribution.

That, I suppose, is a fear every artist has at one time or another.

On a more practical note, I am also at the point in my life where working for peanuts is not an option, no matter the level of talent of the person I am working with. So, let's also hope that Mr. Romanek is a person who understands simple economics.

After all, I don't think I'm asking for too much.

"Bedtime Story" song by Madonna, video directed by Mark Romanek

**Update**

It's Friday, March 21 at 5:36 p.m., and I still have not met with Mr. Romanek. I did meet with Janet at Anonymous Content. She said she would pass along my résumé, that I would most likely hear back from her to set up and interview with Mark next week. I'll keep you posted. Who knows, right?

**Update**

It's Friday, March 28 at 5:06 p.m. This morning I met with Gatekeeper #2, Bridgette Romanek, Mark's wife. She was very nice. I think it went as well as it could have. I'll find out in a couple of days how it really went...

**Update**

It's Tuesday, April 1 at 2:27 p.m. No April Fools here. I didn't get the job. Oddly enough, I'm relieved.

$700 a Week?

2008-03-12T16:56:00.000-07:00

"What?" I thought, "How does one live off of $700 a week?"

As you know, I live in West Hollywood, CA. So, when I was told that the job I was interviewing for paid $700 a week with NO BENEFITS, I couldn't believe my ears.

Now, I want to dispel any misconceptions up front if you are suddenly thinking I'm a snob or that I am living like a queen. Let me assure you, I am not.

It is actually a fact that it is impossible to live off of $700 a week in most areas of Los Angeles.

The average rent here is $1,494 a month, and given that it is recommended that one does not spend more than 30% of their income on rent, a person would need to make at least $59,760 per year to rent an average apartment in an average neighborhood.

I know what you're thinking, and I've already done that. My roommate and I split the rent and utilities, and we still spend $750 each per month.

What about cutting costs? I've done that, too. I cancelled DirecTV. I've switched my wireless plan. I've cancelled my gym membership. I've consolidated my credit card bills. I eat at home. I drink coffee at home. I've even switched my light bulbs to CFL's. So, what is it then that is eating up my budget?

In a word: INSURANCE.

In a month, I spend $525 for health and auto insurance. "What?" you're saying. "That's impossible!"

No, my friends, it is not.

In our lovely country where profit is king, I cannot get health insurance for less than $300 a month, and the only reason I even have said health insurance is because I worked at a hotel last year that offered it to me in a group plan. Had it not been for that group plan, I would not have insurance at all.

You see, I was rejected by every major health insurance carrier (and even some not so major ones) because I have what they call a "pre-existing condition".

Yes, in our fair country where 7% of our population has diabetes if you turn up at Blue Cross or Health Net and fill out an application for coverage, they will tell you to go to hell -- literally.

It's funny because it's true. It's not funny because it's true.

So, what does one do in my situation?

Anyone want to buy a script?

Fonzie Still Reigns as the King of Cool

2008-03-06T19:48:00.000-08:00

He might be the nicest man I've ever met.

Background Check?

2008-03-05T20:20:00.000-08:00

I got a phone call the other day from a woman who had received my résumé and wanted to interview me. The potential job is assisting a producer/actor and his wife in their home office in Brentwood.

Hmm, sounds interesting. Keep talking.

Well, the job entails a lot of organizing of schedules, travel, domestic activities, etc. They want someone who is articulate, well organized, a multi-tasker, responsible, and ethical.

Okay, I am all of the above.

And, can pass a background check.

What? Why? There is nothing to hide for god's sake, but why on earth would you need to do a background check on a low level, underpaid assistant? Who the hell do you think you are?

Apparently, the mystery producer/actor is well known, so those around him need to be on the "up and up" as they say.

Huh.

I have my first interview tomorrow. We'll see if I get passed up the food chain.

To tell you the truth, I don't know if I'm even interested in the job. It sounds boring and, quite frankly, not enough of a challenge. But...and this is a big BUT...my curiosity is piqued. Now, I want to get the interview just to find out who the mystery producer/actor is.

I'll keep you posted.

"Yes, We Can" (Obama Song) by will.i.am

2008-02-28T01:20:00.001-08:00

I find this very moving. Almost as moving as Barack Obama himself!

Please, do yourself and our great country the favor of voting for a man who not only talks the talk, but walks the walk, Barack Obama. Check out his plans for CHANGE.