This works because their concerns are there for a reason. Why would you want to destroy their trust in you and your own credibility by denying what is real for them? You wouldn’t! And there is another great reason for this, it gives you some time to frame things.

Did you catch the framing in my response? When I said that it has a lot of people worried, I was gaining trust and credibility, but when I said I was hearing about it from new customers, that is the set up for telling her that is a problem with other companies. I’m prepared to show verifiable information to prove that we are different, because it’s true. Also, I said the magic words, “all too often,” showing that I, too, have feelings about this, and have ethics that are against it, and have concern for how it affects people. I can even add that it affects my profession, because it hurts reputable companies like mine.

I have, in effect, moved her concern onto other companies instead of arguing about the nature of my own company, profession, product, or service, any of which might receive a tongue lashing from a customer at any time. It just depends on what they’ve experienced. And this is a key point. You can’t deny what people have experienced, even if it is just a thing they picked up from the news that biased them. It was still a commanding voice, and a powerful image. It’s as good as reality once it becomes a memory. Maybe even stronger.

You know that there is some risk involved, so you only use this when you really feel that it will work. You normally would not try this with bigger gaps in the negotiation. You would do the NOT splitting the difference technique before you would do a take away.

We have talked about money so far. But you can also do this with product features, or features of the deal. For example, you can’t wave the maintenance fee, after all. Or you can’t include the installation cost, after all. Or you can’t wave the training charge.

But remember, the more you value the customer, the bigger the gap, and the higher the stakes, the more you should look at other approaches.

The technique I’m about to share can stop this cold. Or, perhaps I should say, cut the C.R.A.P. Sometimes you will have a customer who is thinking about how much they can make per hour by shaving a little more. However, they don’t make a lot per hour, so they don’t mind taking up your time with what feels to you like petty concerns. Don’t get mad, just create a little change in perspective, a change in accountability, a change in motivation.

Here’s how I put an end to negotiations and seal the deal. I discover that I have made a small error, or maybe a big one. Either way, the price is actually somewhat higher, I’m sorry to say. Or the feature actually doesn’t come for free. Or buying just one includes a handling fee.

This really shifts the power dynamic. The person feels remorse for digging themselves into this hole. They could just blame you, because you either made a mistake, or returned from the powers that be with bad news. But deep inside, they feel at fault for not grabbing a good deal, or being too greedy to see that it was a good deal. You just made a good deal out of what was not feeling so good to them a moment ago. That’s a kind of inflation I can live with.

Well, they may say something about it, like, “Aw, c’mon, you told me…” bla bla. And you can say, “I’m really sorry, but we had a special on this extra feature and normally it costs.

But you don’t leave them feeling bad. They could still get the good deal that they missed out on when they were busy trying to get the better deal. And you give them that opportunity, appearing to offer a concession when all you are really doing is coming back to your earlier price. You raised the anchor point to a higher price, and coming down provides some relief for the customer from the artificial pain you inflicted with your bad news.

“Look, I feel really bad about this. Let me go back to them and admit what I did, and maybe I can get it for what I promised. Would that do it for you?”

There you go!

I mentioned cellular providers. They will certainly keep your attention away from the costs of going over your minutes unless you want to bring up the subject yourself. And look at loan providers, even mortgages. They keep the customer’s attention away from the total cost, and focus it on the monthly cost. This keeps the discussion firmly rooted in the customer’s tendency to think in terms of their monthly budget. That monthly paycheck tells them what they can afford. Most consumers don’t think much beyond that convenient reference point. Remember what I said about the importance of keeping things connected to the customer’s frame of reference. And when does any company tell you what the interest will cost over the life of a loan? Most people have no idea what that total will be, even if it is for a house. And that’s usually the largest purchase they will make in their lives.

The customer’s attention is also directed away from customer borne costs, such as the cost of gasoline for a rental car. I’ll bet you think it sounds petty even bringing that up. That’s exactly how I’d want it to sound if I were renting you a car. But why don’t I also charge you for tire wear? How about oil changes and depreciation? Well, that’s factored into the overall cost. Then why not gasoline. Because people are so used to putting gas in a car, and it is such a familiar tradition in the industry, that no one would ever expect to have their gasoline for free. Customer borne costs were borne to be invisible.

If you can break the cost down into smaller units, you can really take away some of the sacrifice or intimidation in the price. You also get their mental gears turning, and this absorbs them more in the negotiation and anticipation of having the product. One reason for this is that the broken-down cost is more animated and more connected to the actual use of the product. This is a key to the psychology of sales, recruiting the mental resources of the customer into the dream and into the buying process. That last sentence spoke volumes. Seriously. You might want to read it again just to commit the principle to memory.

You’ll recognize a broken down price immediately. But are you taking advantage of all of your own opportunities to mount this classic gem?

You can present the price in broken-down terms at the outset, to help establish a frame of reference. Sometimes this makes practical sense, as in a per mile charge for a rental car.

You can also break it out as a reframe, as when you say, “Well, you know, that is just a quarter a day, and for such entertainment value!” Well, since you put it that way, it’s no sacrifice. I’d have to be a real Scrooge to deprive my family of all that entertainment value for just a quarter.

Look for opportunities to break down your price into units of time, item, use, kilobyte, or whatever else you can think of. The more relevant you can make this to your customer’s life and frame of reference the better. Look at cell phone service. They would never talk in annual costs. That would be suicide.

Don’t act so dumb that it ruins whatever credibility and trust you need.

Don’t act so smart that it ruins whatever trust you need.

Don’t act so dumb that it looks like you’re acting.

Don’t act so smart that it’s obvious you’re acting.

Don’t act so dumb that you have to fumble things that matter.

Don’t act so smart that you bring out the competitiveness in the other party.

Don’t act so dumb that they can’t help you.

Don’t act so smart that they don’t want to help you.

Don’t act so dumb that you take too long to think.

Don’t act so smart that you think you don’t have to think.

Don’t act so dumb that you can’t keep things straight.

Don’t act so smart that you think you don’t need to take complete notes.

Don’t act so dumb that you can’t do a thing without checking with your boss.

Don’t act so smart that you just don’t need any approval for anything.

There are some really serious advantages to putting some dumbness in your day. If you talk a bit more slowly, and take a little time to chew things over, thinking out loud, this is very helpful. It allows you to take time to think strategically, while keeping your customer preoccupied with what you’re saying. It allows you to frame things to your advantage. But, since you’re do dumb to do that, the customer may not think anything of it. They don’t feel threatened, and the don’t feel competitive.

For your own psychology, it actually helps keep your own ego in check, as well. We salespeople can get a little ego heavy. Well, some of us do, anyway. So try this on and see what it does for you. You can probably find a television character who is smart, but in a dumb way. You can use them to hammer out the personality you present to your customers. See what happens.

There’s also a psychological advantage in how you influence your customers. They not only feel less competitive, but many of them will actually feel a need to help you a bit. They might help you understand how to sell them, or just not bring out their harshest negotiation techniques so that you at least have a chance. But if they are opportunists, you can reel them in like a strong fish, and reshape their expectations. By the time that happens, they’ll be very invested in the sale, and still have the comfort of knowing they’re superior.

1) Whatever their first offer is, it’s business intelligence for you. What have you learned? This is especially true when you are talking about multifaceted deals.

2) Getting that initial offer is what you need in order to do your very best at bracketing, where you create a price point that places your goal price exactly in the middle between the two. Conditions may allow you to do something a little different, but at least you can take the lead in bracketing. You are much more likely to end up where you want to be. And maybe better if you work in some tactics such as eighthing the difference, as I describe in this book.

3) If you don’t show your hand first, you could get an offer that is better than you expected. Why ruin that by risking them finding out that you would have settled for less?

4) Let’s say they refuse. I suppose that tells you a little something right there. Both sides know that the other knows something about negotiation. But you can’t sit there all day in silence, waiting for the other to do something. That would be too much like my starter marriage.

But what if you are in a setting where there is a price right there on the product, like a car showroom, for example? Same difference, really. The customer tells you that they want to know what you can do for them. You might ask, “Well, really, what price range can you afford right now?” That should loosen them up. If they say they don’t know, then you really have to wonder if they aren’t just window shopping. Not that this would put any damper on your creativity. “But you can afford to buy a new car today?” and so forth.

Don’t be so dazzled by bringing in a big contract that you feel too grateful to negotiate. This is akin to that basic rule I brought up about not needing the sale so much that it throws you off. Remember how much you are contributing to your company’s financial well being by carrying out this essential part of your job, as a negotiator. Don’t let your job description, job title, or other preconceptions distract you from your power to product profit; bottom-line profit; really fast per-minute profit.

I found myself in this position once. I had made an offer, and the other party told me I’d have to do better than that. I did a slight shrug, and tilted my head to the side with a smile, as if to say, “Well, really, I don’t think I can.” After I grew tired of looking beatific and counting to myself, I said, “Knock knock… Man… Man oh man, we’re both good negotiators, using that silent close. They say the first one to speak loses. I lost. So “

what is your counter-offer?”

He chuckled, and said, “Okay, you’re offering this amount and we need to have these items in place to even come close. If we move on price, can you flex on these?” To which I said, “I think we can, but what kind of offer are you willing to make for that?” and we were back into negotiating full speed ahead.

Oh! I almost forgot. What about if this technique is used on you and you don’t want to do a knock-knock joke? Try saying, “Well, gee, just how much better are we talking here? What did you have in mind?” Then, silence.