You want me to watch Undercover Boss?    Put Bill Gates in the mailroom of his empire and watch him get 10 wedgies in one day.

I know everyone thinks the Saints are a good story, and they are, but the Colts offense is just too good and they are too composed.  They go 4 WR deep and if you decide to take out Wayne (see jets, ny) they’ll just go to Garcon or Collie or even Clark.  I think today Peyton solidifies his place as one of the top all time greats, not just a current great.

The Colts have 5 receivers and can stop the run.  Beat the Ravens last week 20-3 and I’ll take the same score this week.

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Vikings at the Saints is the kind of game you really love to see.  I like the Vikes but their running game has vanished for two months.  I don’t see what the Vikings are going to do on offense that the Cardinals didn’t try last week.  The only way the Vikings win is to get to Drew Brees and force mistkes.  Too bad for them the Saints run so many quick plays that the defense has no time to sack anyone.  Best thing Minnesota can do it drop 8 and dare New Orleans to be patient and win on the ground, and they are not patient.  Close game, but I like the under and I like the Saints bringing a nice reward to their fans.  Saints 23-14.

The Colts will almost surely be the #1 seed.

New England #2, either Pitt or Cincy as #3 and the other likely to get a wildcard. San Diego is right behind Denver with a game to play against the Broncos to try and catch up.  Denver still has games against the Giants, Colts and Philly, all of which they might easily lose, plus the annual road game at Kansas City (nicknamed the annual “How is it Denver is losing so badly to this terrible Chiefs team?”)  This does not include the fact that the Ravens are right behind Denver and won the head-to-head.

Denver has in no way locked up a playoff berth.

Man U are behind, but I don’t think they will score as much up front as they do.

Arsenal,Liverpool and Everton follow.

Villa needed Barry and lost him, Man City overpaid for guys that can’t all get on the pitch at the same time.

Problem is – after that just about anyone can be sent down.  Hull and Man City will likely fire their coaches by Christmas, Stoke and West Ham don’t score enough, Spurs…I have no idea.  And this doesn’t even include the promoted teams either.  If I had to say…it’s be Portsmouth down with Burnley and Hull.

Luckily ESPN is covering 4 dozen EPL games this season.

Man U are behind, but I don’t think they will score as much up front as they do.

Arsenal,Liverpool and Everton follow.

Villa needed Barry and lost him, Man City overpaid for guys that can’t all get on the pitch at the same time.

Problem is – after that just about anyone can be sent down.  Hull and Man City will likely fire their coaches by Christmas, Stoke and West Ham don’t score enough, Spurs…I have no idea.  And this doesn’t even include the promoted teams either.  If I had to say…it’s be Portsmouth down with Burnley and Hull.

Luckily ESPN is covering 4 dozen EPL games this season.

Man U is right behind them, but they have 3 strikers: one with a temper, one prima donna and one is can’t go all season without getting hurt.  I expect they’ll be running a 4-5-1 in short order.  Man U lucks out that van der Saar gets hurt during the start of the season where their easy games are front-loaded.

Liverpool I rate above Arsenal, while Liverpool seems more precarious in depth.

Everton is the same as last year so a similar finish of 5th could happen. Villa let Barry go which will hurt and they fell apart in the latter third.  Man City spent a fortune but all of it on strikers (not counting Barry) but unless this teams fields 3 defenders I don’t know how they will all play.

Sunderland may surprise and, given the lack of quality opposition, finish in the top half.  Bolton isn’t great and how good will Blackburn be now that Roque has gone?  Wigan… I’m not sure about them either. Fulham can finish top half if they show defense as can West Ham if they find any offense.

Almost everyone else can be relegated.  Hull didn’t deserve to stay up, Portsmouth seem to be following the Newcastle route, the newly promoted of Burnley, Wolverhampton and B City don’t dazzle me.

What is cool?  4 dozen EPL games on ESPN this year.  Maybe we can get more attention than FSC provides.

I gotta say, I love that their sport pretty much runs year-round.

It will also be interesting to see if ManU are better or worse without the gaping salary in the middle.

My argument against that…

1. I like seeing every team represented, especially in the opening introductions.  The Intro for the All-Star game is one of the only intros to any event that is actually tolerable and enjoyable these days.

2. If every team wasn’t represented, the All-Star rosters would be nothing but Yankees and Red Sox and Dodgers and Angels and frankly we get plenty of that from ESPN and FOX as it is.  It’s inundating enough that every NYY-BOS game during the season will be thrust upon us but to have the AS game that way as well would be annoying.

3. As the line between the leagues dilutes with tv and free agency, showing players from every team matters more, not less. We need to be reminded that smaller market teams have great players just like the marquis teams cos goodness knows the networks aren’t going to give us that reminder.  Just ask ESPN how many games will be devoted to the Pirates or Orioles in the final month. 

4.  There will always be valid players that miss out due to ASG roster size, positions filled, et al.  It is not a case that removing the players from the Nats and Padres would suddenly cure this issue.  This has been true for 70 years.

Now, in response, NBC has come out with ‘Meteor’.  I have to say that I am appalled.  This is a horrific production.  This ‘movie event’ is one of the worst things I have seen in a very long time.  I could only stomach the first hour but in that time, and I’m sure I’m not spoiling anything since the viewing audience is minimal, I saw-

- a lead character get killed by a car for no reason

- a lead character get kidnapped for no reason

- Jason Alexander, who shouldn’t need the paycheck, in a bizarrely bad role, seemingly as the head of an important organization yet with the science and communication skills of Napoleon Dynamite.

- a subplot about a total tool and his girlfriend Toolina driving off to a day spa during a world crisis

- a subplot about a dirty cop who wants to kill his ex-partner’s kid and dad.  (this one really offends me – it’s a movie about an asteroid coming to hit Earth – what’s this pointless revenge crap doing in here?)

- a scene with some white trash bigot stealing bottled water from the store.  After all, nothing brings out the racist in all of us like a pending celestial calamity.

The missus and I love bad movies, but usually because they are so bad and cheesy you can find the humor in them.  But this….no, I’m afraid even I have standards.  So, without further ado…

The ‘Worst Thing I Have Seen on TV’ Award for 2009 (so far) goes to “Meteor”!   Congrats to everyone who made this blight on the viewing landscape possible.