Style Artillery by Alex

Quick, catch her!

2012-06-20T05:34:00.003-07:00

There she is, there's that damn Gaga! Quick, catch her!

Matchy-matchy hell

2012-01-18T05:16:00.000-08:00

Catherine, why, WHY are your shoes matching your bag? What are you trying to do to me - vom.

Biel vs Ciccone

2012-01-17T14:31:00.000-08:00

Madonna: Oh I'm terribly sorry, I appear to have stepped on your dress.

Jessica: Not to worry, it's only on loan. You're Madonna, right?

Madonna: Well, duh. Your sleeping with Justin Timberlake, right?

Jessica: Totes McGotes.

Madonna: My daughter says that! What does it mean? Is it like, totally?

Jessica: Totally! By the way, what's with the accent?

Madonna: I beg your pardon?

Jessica: Yes, just like that! What's with that?

Madonna: I do not know to what you refer to.

Jessica: Are you serious? The British accent your putting on, is that for real?

Madonna: I'm sorry, who did you say you were again?

Magic Eye

2011-12-02T04:55:00.000-08:00

Erm, what's going on here Alexa? You seem to have forgotten your - oh wait, is that a skirt? Okay, I get it... I think. Nope, still confused. A short belted coat with a split midi-skirt is a bit like a retro magic eye picture. You squint and you squint, but you just cant seem to grasp what the hell is going on.

Meanwhile, downtown...

2011-11-30T05:29:00.000-08:00

What are you looking at? Of course I do all my washing myself! Who do think I am, Madonna?

Up, up and away

2011-11-23T10:52:00.000-08:00

I was lucky enough to stay at the wonderfully decadent Aviator hotel in Farnborough recently, and am already hoping to revisit this boutique masterpiece. Sidled alongside the private Farnborough airport, the hotel has been designed with Farnborough's aviation history in mind. This is most evident in the interior décor, where the glamour of the 1930s merges perfectly with the present day to create a contemporary luxury with timeless elegance.

As you enter the hotel, you are greeted with a towering atrium up towards the roof, very much reminiscent of Edmund Goulding's Grand Hotel. It's certainly very imposing, completely unexpected, and sets the tone for the opulence and luxury that awaits. Check-in was swift, and the staff well-trained and polite. With the neighbouring airport, the hotel is naturally popular with business people, and is well equipped to cater to their needs with excellent meeting spaces, and a very impressive boardroom. The Aviator has also recently acquired a marriage licence for those who want a wedding with a difference, where the bride walks down a 'runway', rather than an aisle.

My top-floor Sky Suite offered perfect views of the private jets coming and going into the airport, yet was relaxing and quiet. The dark wood, touches of leather, and the separate living area all added to the luxurious nature of the accommodation. The bathroom was large, with a huge shower area, and the suite even offered a separate walk-in wardrobe (sadly not filled with designer clobber to wear for dinner). The separate living area, with L-shaped sofa and a coffee table full of magazines, was the perfect place to relax.

Upon arrival in the suite I was greeted by strawberries dipped in chocolate and a nice bottle of bubbly, and relaxed in front of the television (there are televisions in both the living area and the bedroom area) to watch one of the many films available to guests at the push of a button. Aviation themed wares fill the room, including a retro globe and a model airplane, and a coffee table book depicting the world from the air. All in all it’s a very classy affair, but not showy. Essentially, the rooms feel like a beautifully decorated home, rather than a hotel.

Before dinner I explored the hotel's cocktail bar, Sky Bar, in which I was encouraged to order something that I wouldn't ordinarily enjoy. I ended up with a superb whisky-based cocktail with apple and honey. The bar, as expected, was opulent, if a little heavy on the purple decor. It's certainly the perfect place to relax after a long journey, or indeed meet with friends, as other guests were doing.

I ate in the hotel's excellent brasserie, which is adorned with pictures of old Hollywood greats such as Joan Crawford, Clark Gable et al. The decor is rich and warm, and genuinely feels more like a Parisian restaurant than a hotel. Treated to a seven course tasting menu, I tucked into canapés, scallops with chorizo, watercress soup, quail salad, fish, venison, and some of the very best white wines I have ever tasted. We were seated in the private dining room that doubles up as the wine store, full of dark wood and soft lighting that makes the tasting menu experience even more special. A final assiette of desserts with coffee and I was fit to burst.

The Aviator truly is a wonder. The hotel’s inspiring and glamorous design, excellent service, and incredible food cannot fail to impress. The local aviation history, right on the doorstep, adds to the atmosphere and makes the hotel all the more significant. Fans of stylish design with retro touches, good food, and opulent, comfortable accommodation, will certainly feel at home at the Aviator. Visit the website

Bare-chest cheek

2011-11-23T05:16:00.001-08:00

Busted!

2011-11-03T06:13:00.000-07:00

Tee hee! Look at these old catalogue style pics of Jane Birkin! Loser!

Memory Lane

2011-11-01T13:06:00.000-07:00

A trip to The Fashion Museum yesterday in Bath, which I certainly cannot recommend to those with any kind of fear of mannequins, for there are many, many frightening ones here. Fortunately, they are wearing lovely clothes to drool over. The museum separates the outfits into periods, and below you can see some of the pictures I took. My favourite outfit was the beautiful green shooting stars dress from the 1940s (directly below). You will spot a few recognisable dresses, including the famous Versace jungle print dress made famous my Jennifer Lopez a decade ago. Sorry about the quality of the pictures today, I only had my iPhone to hand! Oh, and check out the Kate Moss mannequin - pretty realistic, non?

The 40s

Swinging sixties and jumble-sale seventies

She definitely went to Studio 54 back in the day

THAT Versace dress

Kate Moss wearing her own Topshop dress

Smile!

2011-10-27T05:31:00.000-07:00

Rosie: Get out of the picture.

Kate: No, why should I?

Rosie: Because I'm the face of the brand, not you!

Kate: Says who?

Rosie: Look, I didn't want to get nasty, but, your career isn't high-profile enough to represent the brand.

Kate: Says the girl who ruined Transformers with her terrible acting!

Rosie: At least my eyes aren't differnt colours!

Kate: Below the belt, bitch.

Rosie: Just like your boobs...

Kate: How freakin' dare you!

Rosie: Just get out of the picture!

Kate: No!

Rosie: Christopher, please tell her to go.

Kate: Don't listen to those puffy lips of hers Christopher!

Photographer: Say cheese!

Rosie: Quick, smile!

Love Never Dies

2011-10-26T05:14:00.000-07:00

My love never died when I somehow managed to miss the opportunity to buy this beautiful cardigan from Zara last year, and now its back! Without a doubt the top of my autumn wish list. The Top!

Let Battle Commence

2011-10-25T05:34:00.000-07:00

Next year's Best Actress Oscar will go to either Meryl Streep or Michelle Williams. You heard it here first. Streep will undoubtedly knock us for six with her upcoming portrayal of Margaret Thatcher in The Iron Lady, but I am far more excited about the latter's transformation into the iconic Marilyn Monroe for My Week With Marilyn, depicting the troubled star's relationship with a young British production assistant whilst making The Prince and the Showgirl with Laurence Olivier. After having received two Oscar nominations previously (for Brokeback Mountain and Blue Valentine), I think Michelle has the edge over two-time winner Streep.

Two actresses beginning with M, playing two icons beginning with M, after one prize, beginning with, em, O. Go on, watch the trailer.

Dear Madonna

2011-10-24T05:47:00.000-07:00

Dear Madonna,

I love you, but this SIMPLY has to stop! Enough of the bloody fish-nets, enough of the midi-length dresses (what are you hiding under there?), and most of all, please God step away from the fillers. Your pillow face is looking more comfy by the day. I'm sure you understand that I, as your loyal supporter, should be as honest with you as possible.

PS - sorry I didn't make it to dinner the other night, I was busy writing a review for W.E

(don't worry, its good...ish)

Love Alex

Let's stampede for Versace

2011-10-20T11:20:00.000-07:00

Here is a sneak peek at the upcoming collection from Versace for H&M. Remember last autumn when everyone went mad and trampled over each other for a glimpse at the Lanvin Loves collection for H&M? Well this year will see things turned up a notch as the bling-tastic Italian fashion house makes a love child with everyones favourite Swedish fast-fashion brand. As you can see below, Donatella has not held back, designing large over-embelished prints, brighter than bright colours, and a very early 90s feel. Not that that's a bad thing. In fact, it's quite refreshing, and why should Versace take itself too seriously? We all know it as being OTT and loud, and that's just fine. There is even a collection for us boys, though I'm not sure monochrome head-to-toe is quite my thing...

The sincerest form of flattery

2011-10-10T13:28:00.000-07:00

Here is the new album cover from those lovely Saturdays. Isn't it pretty? Yes, but its terribly familiar isn't it? Now where have I seen it before? Hmm....

Special Delivery

2011-10-05T05:42:00.000-07:00

Someone has sent me a present...

Pretty Please

2011-10-05T05:29:00.000-07:00

Can someone please buy me this beautiful Oxblood wool trench? Thanks, generous reader.

My Review: Melancholia

2011-10-01T11:12:00.000-07:00

It was with huge excitement, and a little trepidation that I arrived at Soho's Curzon Cinema last night, clutching my white save the date card. Lars von Trier invites you to the beginning of the end, it read. I have been looking forward to Melancholia since I first heard about it at Cannes earlier this year, but with Lars von Trier, one never knows exactly what so expect.

The film begins with a five minute series of ultra slow-motion images set to an epic overture from Wagner. Birds fall from the sky, Charlotte Gainsbourg sinks into a golfing green, and Kirsten Dunst attracts electricity through her fingers. The whole thing is utterly pretentious, but the stunning scenery, together with Wagner's powerful overture, makes for a very impressive opening quite unlike anything von Trier has ever done.

The film itself is split in two parts, one centred on Justine (Dunst) and the second on her sister Claire (Gainsbourg). Dunst perfectly conveys her character's developing depression with zombie-like authenticity (she did win the Best Actress award at Cannes, after all), but it is Gainsbourg that truly shines, playing the controlling older sister, who herself takes on her own melancholic state as the threat of an oncoming planet (Melancholia) increases.

As with other von Trier films, the supporting cast are all excellent, particularly Charlotte Rampling as the girls cold-hearted mother, and Stellan Skarsgard as Justine's horrific boss (trust me, you wont complain about your boss ever again). Also expected was lots and lots of long, naturalistic dialogue. This may not appeal to those who prefer their dialogue plot-driven and zippy, but it allows the actors to demonstrate their abilities to those all important jury members. Again, it is Gainsbourg who succeeds above the others.

Overall, Melancholia is a difficult film to watch, tiring even. But the imagery, music and performances are so beautiful that it's easy to forgive von Trier for being a little pretentious and, dare I say it, pointless.

Nip/Tuck

2011-09-27T05:23:00.000-07:00

As you may have noticed, the site is undergoing a little nip and tuck at the moment. I promise that it will not end up looking like the Bride of Wildenstein...

Marks & Stardust

2011-08-31T10:07:00.000-07:00

What do we have here then? Why its ~~Scarlett Johansson reject~~ that lovely actor Ryan Reynolds and Style Artillery favourite Rosie H-W. Since when were they ~~shagging~~ getting cosy? Don't worry, its just a campaign for M&S. Yes, you read right, I said M&S. The gorgeous twosome are the new faces of the chain's Autograph collection, and don't they just look, well, gorgeous. Smug bastards. Perhaps M&S will become more than just three bean wraps and Percy Pigs...

It's just like brushing your teeth

2011-08-17T05:18:00.000-07:00

The last time I smoked a menthol cigarette was in 2006 after drinking three too many snakebites. Stangely enough, I didn't smoke, but enjoyed the peculiar yet refreshing minty taste. It was like brushing your teeth, except the bathroom was a dance floor, and a menthol cigarette is nothing like a toothbrush (unless your toothbrush is white, in which case it is exactly like a cigarette). One thing was for sure though, menthol cigarettes were not cool. However, all that seems to have changed, at least according to this street-style fodder from ~~dirty~~ trendy East London, who seems to claim that menthol is the new black (as well as wearing black, oddly). I guess we'd better do as she says, in case things get nasty.

Riots? What riots?

2011-08-09T05:43:00.000-07:00

There's nothing like a nice picture of jolly old Fearne Cotton looking amazing to lift up the spirits as London burns to the ground. She is just so effortless, non? Love the boots and the faded skinnies (I'm getting a bit bored of Euro brights, too). As per usual, Cotton has her trusty Mulberry Tillie bag which, considering today's news, should perhaps be kept hidden. Or used as a weapon. Either or...

Special Delivery

2011-08-02T10:24:00.000-07:00

My Beautiful Bertie Brighton Blue Brogues have arrived! Jealous? Of course you are...

Worth a thousand words...

2011-08-01T10:45:00.000-07:00

One of the freebies in my goodie bag from last week's Velour magazine party was this jolly book about that French madam, Coco Chanel. Naturally, I haven't had the time to start reading it yet (I'm still working though The Very Hungry Caterpillar), but check out some of the pictures below, beautiful!

Coffee Table Reading

2011-08-01T10:18:00.001-07:00