Editor’s Note: This article was originally written on March 29th, 2008. I am inspired to re-publish it after reading an inspirational article on Financial Samurai to honor our heroes.

Last week, a friend of mine, Susan Rogers, sent me a video clip that, upon watching brought tears from my eyes. I, for once, realized how to view life in its noble perspective. In the midst of thoughts surrounding goals that are the self full filling, I had lost my focus to ponder on those who allowed me to have life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.

Those tears were for neglecting to care for giants among us, for those who sacrificed all they had for others, for those who fought for the old glory, for those with their silent act of patriotism and deep sense of service for the country, for those souls of inspirations that allowed me to have the life that I love, dreams that I dream and freedom that I cherish.

Those giants were at the front line to defeat Nazis to liberate Europe and Asia from the dark clouds of tyranny. America had its 400,000 brave souls sacrificed their lives in the most historic moments in our life time. Those who survived lived in anonymity, never bragged about their larger than life feats. They quietly blended with other Americans, raised their family. They lived with utmost dignity and with love for their country, and what it stands for: Life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.

But we are at the brink of loosing them all. 1500 WWII veterans are dying daily and before we know, they will go with an astonishing act of sacrifice and selfless endeavor in the history of humanity. Before it’s too late, I for once from my heart wanted to salute these giants and say -

“Thank you for all that you have done for all of us, We can never repay this debt of noble, selfless service that we have received from you.”

They are WWII veterans…

We idolize movie stars when we fall in love with their movies, We spend hours talking about Monday night football, We adore and get influenced by politicians selling dreams and hopes to win our votes. When will we take time to show our compassion, our deep gratitude, our true respect to those without whom all actors, sportsmen and politicians had slim chance to pursue their self centered lives.

I guess in one sense you can say we are an endangered species. But unlike the spotted owl or the whooping crane, there is no legislation that can be enacted to save us. We are rapidly disappearing off the radar screen, and soon all that will be left is what we have written, what we have recorded, and some old, fading photographs. Our voices will be forever silent, and the untold “first-hand accounts” of our experiences will remain untold.

We are the boys of World War II. We are dying off at the rate of 1,500 a day — that’s 45,000 a month. That number will steadily increase until the unyielding laws of mathematics give us an increasing rate of deaths, but a decreasing number of deaths — the remaining pool will have become too small.

But in our lifetimes, we made a difference. We had the good fortune to live during a time when honor, patriotism, and character were important. We stepped up to defend freedom, and put our lives on the line for the “cause.” It was a moment in history that may never occur again. – Quentin Aanenson

Before You Go

The elderly parking lot attendant wasn’t in a good mood!

Neither was Sam Bierstock. It was around 1 a.m., and Bierstock, a Delray Beach, Fla. , eye doctor, business consultant, corporate speaker and musician, was bone tired after appearing at an event.

He pulled up in his car, and the parking attendant began to speak. “I took two bullets for this country and look what I’m doing,” he said bitterly.

At first, Bierstock didn’t know what to say to the World War II veteran. But he rolled down his window and told the man, “Really, from the bottom of my heart, I want to thank you.”

Then the old soldier began to cry.

“That really got to me,” Bierstock says.

Cut to today.

Bierstock, 58, and John Melnick, 54, of Pompano Beach – a member of Bierstock’s band, Dr. Sam and the Managed Care Band – have written a song inspired by that old soldier in the airport parking lot. The mournful “Before You Go” does more than salute t hose who fought in WWII. It encourages people to go out of their way to thank the aging warriors before they die.


When 56 brave men signed declaration of independence, a nation was born. A nation that, with its open arm, offered lasting hope for the mankind. These 56 brave men also sacrificed all they had – their wealth, family and dreams. Our men in uniform have shown similar act of sacrifice over and over again.

Have we forgotten ? Yes, we have. We’ve forgotten that giants are not the one on silver screen, not the one who make pompous speeches at the podium. They are the ones who silently served the cause of the peace, cause of humanity. They are in oblivion.

So, today, When you get angry if your meal did not arrive on time or when you curse someone on your way to the ball game for driving slow – take a moment to introspect and seek gratitude to have freedom to choose what you eat, freedom to have fun at the ball park. You’ll realize how small we’ve become inside as we’ve grown outside in the pursuit of egoist, momentary pleasures.

Let’s collectively pay our heart felt tribute to these unsung, noble souls before they go. We owe them gratitude for our liberty and our way of life.

The willingness with which our young people are likely to serve in any war, no matter how justified, shall be directly proportional as to how they perceive veterans of earlier wars were treated and appreciated by their nation. – George Washington

photo by: CRishel

Everything in your life is influenced by the rule of 80/20.

Enter the world of hacks and anti-hacks alike — with due respect to the arguments from either side of the fence — I’ve stumbled upon an axiom that can help you not only to de-clutter your thoughts, but also to develop laser sharp focus for what matters most in your life.

We focus 80% of our time on 20% of meager matters in our lives that — if happens — will only have 5% influence on our happiness and success.

Have you heard someone say, “I’d love to do that but ____”? We all have. It’s a sign of a mind cluttered with tasks that are least important to our end goal — our happiness.

The simplest path to happiness is to put your thoughts into proper perspective. We tend to focus on things that scare us most. In reality, those things are least important for our happiness and success. Think about it!

Time is infinitely more precious than money, and there is nothing common between them. You cannot accumulate time, you cannot borrow time; you can never tell how much time you have left in the Bank of Life. Time is Life…
- Israel Davidson

On Worries

We worry about things that are not in our control. By focusing on worries that may never see daylight, we tend to exhaust our time, energy and obviously focus on what lies ahead. Years ago, I flew from Atlanta to San Francisco.

I noticed a woman sitting beside me with a pale face. Shortly after the take off, the captain announced that weather may get rough, and there is a chance of turbulence in our way. All of a sudden, this quiet woman started screaming. I was bemused since I’d never been through such a horrible situation before. I tried to ask her what has happened to her. She kept screaming harder.

After a long and frightening ordeal, crew members found out that she was simply worried about the plane crashing as a result of the word turbulence being mentioned by the captain.

She was worried about — if any –20 percent chance of a bad weather causing remote 5 percent chance of a turbulence. As you can imagine, it never happened.

On Business

Your business or job can pose challenges that are meager yet — if you zoom in on them — they can take all the wind out of your brain.

Several years ago, I had to replace the roof at one of my hotels. For about a week, I battled in my mind over whether I should go with 30 years architectural shingles or 50 years architectural shingles. What if I own this hotel after 30 years ? Wouldn’t it be wise to go for the 50 years shingles ?

Looking back, now I realize how fool I was to even fret over a subject that has 20 percent or less chance of me owning this hotel after 30 years. Even if that happens, there is less than 5 percent chance of the same roof to survive on that hotel after 30 years.

I sold that hotel in less than a year after replacing the roof. I suppose you get the cue. I’d lost focus and precious time as well.

On goals

While focusing on goals, it is important to visualize and write them on the paper. If you do not visualize the expected outcome and deadline, you may squabble over actions that are meager at best in terms of achieving your goal.

For example, years ago, during the dot-com boom, I developed an auction site with sleepless nights and days of programming. I, along with two other friends, was excited to have a piece of history that eBay was destined to reign. However, during the development, I started spending excessive time on the look and feel of the site than on marketing the site.

Soon, we lost focus as a team over look and feel that had — at best — 20 percent chance of providing any competitive advantage and even if so, the same look and feel would have 5 percent or less influence on the fate of our business model.

Needless to say, our auction site never hosted any auctions ever.

On Clutter

It’s essential to get organized to cleanse our surroundings and our mind to gain sharp focus. I’ve had bad habit to harbor thoughts of “I may need it in the future,” or “Keep this magazine for the cool article that I may read in the future”. This vice habit was largely responsible for the clutter that I used to surround with.

After a while, I knew that if I have not taken time in past few weeks to glance over these magazines or that newspaper article, they have 20 percent or less chance to get my attention ever and even if that happens, that information may have less than 5 percent intrinsic value to make my life better.

I now use 60 day rule to either donate or throw away things that I don’t use. This has saved time that is infinitely more precious than going through daunting task of keeping clutter that needs my attention every time I gather courage to get organized.

For tribal man space was the uncontrollable mystery. For technological man it is time that occupies the same role.
- Marshall Mcluhan (1911-1980) Canadian communications theorist and educator.

Readers: Are you doing anything to de-clutter your thoughts to deposit more time in the Bank of your Life for your happiness?

Photo by: toolstop

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

Have you banished the dream of living life on your terms because of the  fear of failure? Have you allowed dreaded “If I …” to interject a question mark on claiming your ultimate freedom? If so, you’re not alone!

We have heard many “If I …”  while talking to someone.

1.  If I have million dollars in the bank, I will quit my job and retire.

2. If I can make extra $10K, I will tour the world.

3. If I win the lottery, I will build a school in my home town.

My life story is not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. When I embarked upon my dream to own my business, I was nervous. I had not given enough focus to all of my “If I..” to feel confident that I can deal with unknowns. Nonetheless, I made the plunge.

Our lives are dominated by strings of events, that revolve all around us, as a consequence to anything we do —  be it quiting your job for another, starting your first business or just walking down the street. Every kind of activity or action that we undertake, no matter how small, has an effect on us and on the people around us.

Once you throw off the bowlines and sail on your own, you will be the captain of your destiny. Until now, someone made decisions for you. Now, you will make decisions for yourself.

Every action, has an equal and opposite  reaction .This unfortunately brings with it a lot of pressure — for most individuals — when faced with a more or less important decision. Fear of  failure cloud their judgments, and they soon begin to become indecisive.

Decisions make you powerful, active, focused, and ready to face your day. Indecision makes you procrastinate, lose initiative, gumption, and get up and go. So, in truth, making a good decision isn’t necessarily conditioned by outside variables —  like having plenty of money in your bank account; other people or events and so on – but rather by your ability to make bold decisions.

There aren’t set of  ”If I..”  you can check mark to make bold decisions – after all it’s just a conviction you harbor between your two ears.

Fate of your dream largely depends on your ability to make bold decisions now!

I’ve used these timeless techniques to make plunge from a wage earner into a dream earner. These techniques will help you overpass the hump of uncertainty and help you live your dream life now.

1. Embrace unknowns.

No training or preparation will ensure outcome precisely. Understand and acknowledge that there will be bumps on the road when you start living life on your terms. Living life on your terms gives your strength to deal with unknowns that are sure to pose challenges along the way.  I didn’t know all aspects of the business when I decided to start my own business. I dealt with fair share of my challenges, and I made plethora of mistakes along the way.  Regardless, I won’t do any other way if I have chance to do it all over again.

2. Think fast.

When faced with a decision, do it fast. Don’t think too much about what might happen after you undertake the respective action. What’s done is done.  You have to do some information gathering to make decisions. But your gut instinct and street smart approach will let you make bold decisions quickly. The more you do it, the faster you’ll become and the more decisive you’ll become.

3. Believe in yourself.

Keep telling and believe in yourself as a decisive individual and the outcome you desire. Don’t denigrate yourself for being indecisive.

4. Squash the bug of procrastination.

Some decisions, no matter how much you think them over, can’t seem to reach a favorable end. The longer you think about them, the more problems and obstacles you’ll find in your path. This is where you have to turn to your natural instincts, to guide you through. Let your gut speak out.

5. Get out of the box.

Forget about your preconceptions and fixed ideas about anything in particular. Clarity is extremely important for taking a bold decision, so keeping an open mind is a great way to put things into perspective to make the best decision.

6. Don’t be afraid.

Earlier in the article I mentioned that the biggest cause for indecisiveness is fear of the failure. While having reserves, before taking an important decision, is very natural you shouldn’t let them overwhelm you. Don’t be afraid to make a decision and learn to embrace failure as much as success.

7. Visualize the outcome.

Look at yourself from the outside and picture you as a decisive person. How would I act then? Also when faced with a decision, visualize yourself in the completion process and then in the aftermath. Then start asking yourself, like you’ve already taken the decision and completed the task: was it worth my time? did the benefits outweigh the disadvantages? and so on.

8. It’s okay to screw up.

Sometimes life takes us into directions we’d wish we never went. A thought of going back in time and taking the road on the left, always crosses our minds, but what’s done is done and you should keep it that way; such things in life are inevitable, so the first thing you should do when it happens, is not to feel bad about it. Just look at it as a life experience, as a step up in your progression towards a complete life. There’s no such thing as a good or bad decision.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today – Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) Third president of the United States

9. Act Now.

Don’t sit on your butt all day, thinking how to act. Be proactive, take the initiative and act without fear of the outcome. Any decision is better than none at all. When I made that dreaded decision to quit the job and embark out on my own, I had not planned every possible “If I…”  that I was about to face. I’d trained my mind to be aware of these challenges, and I was prepared to deal with them with best of my ability. I had decided that time to pursue my dream is now or never.

I’m glad that I decided to throw off the bowline and took control of my lifeboat to sail away from the safe harbor. I knew that there would be obstacles along the way. But I also knew that no planning or learning could ever overcome these challenges that were destined to arrive. I decided to embrace the challenges as happily as the successes, and to take action and to never look back. It’s a decision I haven’t regretted since.

Will you ever retire if you are doing what you love to do? Think about it. We harbor thoughts of retirement more to visualize having freedom. If you learn to live life on your terms now then retirement may never entice you. Do you agree?

How soon not now, becomes never – Martin Luther (1483-1546) German priest and scholar

Photo Courtesy: Amira Photography

Writing is another powerful way to sharpen the mental saw. Keeping a journal of our thoughts, experiences, insights, and learning  promotes mental clarity, exactness, and context.  — Stephen R. Covey  

My mind is a powerful engine that runs my life. I’m sure that’s the case with you as well. Ironically, I’m more conscious about what I eat and wear than those thoughts that fuel my mind.

When we put our net worth on a paper, we never include our biggest asset — our mind!

Think that for a second. Isn’t that an astounding revelation? I spend more time pondering over the food that I eat and even the water that I drink than to safeguard the quality of thoughts that run my life.

It’s always a struggle to develop consciousness towards intangibles in our lives — anger, frustration, self-pity, low self-esteem are the forms of impure thoughts that influence the quality of life without my awareness. Manifesting internal awareness is the key to your happiness.

A view of reality

Our world savors the outer reflection — a beautiful body, a muscular body, a beautiful house, a beautiful car. This approach leads our thinking to form opinion by an outer reality of our lives more so than an inner reality. We are judged by our possessions more so than how magnanimous our hearts are, how compassionate our thoughts are, how benevolence our actions are.

To find yourself, think for yourself.
– Socrates (BC 469-BC 399) Greek philosopher of Athens

An outer reality vs Inner reality

As I pondered in a moment of silence, I stumbled upon the truth for the mental clarity and boundless happiness. If I develop awareness of two distinct realities — an outer and inner reality — I can subvert fake, momentary desire of selfish and egotist pleasures. An outer reality is what exists outside and around me. An outer reality subvert my inner reactions by molding thoughts that incessantly flow though my mind like an ocean surf pounding the beach front. These thoughts form opinion about everything that I do during the day. For instance, when someone drives recklessly, I tend to get exasperated quickly with rushing thoughts of anger. These thoughts spur actions that often hurt me, from within, yet I feel helpless and act upon those thoughts of impurity.

An inner reality is a form of pure thoughts that arise from my own controllable actions by practicing meditation and yoga. An inner reality is akin to a warm room with boundless tranquility unaware of the harsh outer reality — inclement weather that exists outside.

I practice mediation and yoga everyday to create inner reality that is pleasant and entirely in my control. We allow our thoughts to be blended by impurity that comes from the outer reality. A reckless driver subvert my otherwise tranquil thoughts with impurity of anger and exasperation. Those who live life of boundless mental clarity and happiness know how to keep an outer reality from influencing their inner thoughts. With this, I’ve learned not to focus on actions that I cannot control.

I cannot control actions of a reckless driver, but I can choose how I react by controlling my inner reality. This is the first step to the path of mental clarity.

Outer goals vs inner goals

I tend to spend about an hour every week to plan my actions for the week with specific goals that I’d like to achieve. Over the time, I’ve found that sometimes it becomes rather difficult to keep perspective of what truly I wanted to achieve. More importantly, I’ve felt emptiness even after achieving certain goals.

I’ve stumbled upon another shiny truth in the quest to solve this mystery. I’m almost always focused on the outer goals — what I wanted to achieve in a physical form. I’m not focused at all on the inner goals — how I can achieve a spiritual balance from within. For the last few months, when I plan my week, I also plan time to develop my spiritual being.

Achieving physical goals or outer goals without achieving spiritual goals or inner goals is akin to focusing on physical fitness without the quality of food we eat. Often, we juxtapose our outer goals and inner goals to subvert thoughts that are necessary to achieve these goals.

Additional tips for the mental clarity and happiness

1. Use power of mantras daily.

Mantra means a hack for the mind. ‘Man’ means mind in Sanskrit. Mantras are being used in the Eastern culture for thousands of years to train mind to form a habit. I use mantras for mental clarity. For instance, I frequently use, “Think well, eat well” mantra to remind myself the importance of choosing the right thoughts and food for my mental and physical clarity. “One thing in, two things out” is a mantra I use anytime I shop something and bring a new item to home. for example, If I buy one new shirt, I’ll donate two old shirts.

2. Engage in small acts of compassion.

Compassion has power to unleash positivity by performing positive actions to help others. I always try to make an effort to help someone everyday to unleash power of positivity to influx my mind. Act of compassion acts as an agent of clarity and boundless happiness.

3. Learn not to expect an outcome.

This is rather difficult and somewhat esoteric. How can we not expect an outcome for which we work hard for? It’s human nature to expect favorable result from any meaningful effort. However, if I can act without expecting result, I can detach emotions that arise from the outcome that is not in alignment with my perception. The theory of karma simply teaches to act with compassion and leave the outcome to the fate with no emotions attached. Try this exercise with small tasks that you engage in. Once you master the concept, you can apply that to bigger things that you do in life. This doesn’t imply that we put lackluster effort behind our action for the fact that an outcome is irrelevant. It’s exactly opposite. It enables us to put best of our thoughts and actions knowing that an outcome will not jeopardize the clarity of our thoughts.

Associate reverently, as much as you can, with your loftiest thoughts.
-Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) American naturalist, poet and philosopher.

How do you achieve mental clarity? Have you stumbled upon different ways to purify thoughts for a better and balanced life?

Photo by: ConnectIrmeli

Life is really simple, but men insist on making it complicated.
-Confucius (BC 551-BC 479) Chinese philosopher.

Simple life is a pathway to happiness. It’s as simple as a rainbow of seven colors. In the modern world full of gizmos, simplicity is an extinct virtue.

Simplicity is a subtle, profound way of life leading to the nurturing of your inner happiness. That makes me believe that sources of external happiness veil our capacity to nurture inner happiness.

Simplicity is a way to manage our time to deposit more inner pleasure in our Bank of Life.

Habits and addictions are two sources of external happiness that keep our focus on excess leading to more habits and addictions. As I grow older, I’m mindful of my life; I am dwelling deep into time; I am trading for the pleasure of mine that takes away eternal, inner pleasure of time with my wife, my children, my spiritual being and the community that I live in.

Excess in eating, spending, working, ego, thinking, pleasures and — of course — doing everything to please others is a sure way to wreck your life speeding on the highway of more stuff for happiness; I am not against materialism, I am against excess that leads to the wreckage.

These  7 habits are essential to set limits, and to create inner awareness to live happy, content life with less.

Less eating:

Overeating has many dreary consequences including high fat, high sugar food, sedatory life and emotional clutter leading to depression. With my new-found mantra, I’ve been devoting my focus on the diet. My mantra for the day becomes, “Better and balanced diet to invest time to deposit more inner pleasure in Bank of my Life.” This allows me to be mindful about what I eat. Being a vegetarian, it allows me to focus my attention to eat vegan food rich in fiber and protein. I feel excess in energy — and certainly relaxed — as a result.

Less spending:

If you pay attention to your closet, you can see excess manifested through your spending habit. We’ve all had time in our life when we refused and abhor to open that bill, charged every credit card in our wallet to the limit to buy things that we wanted. I’ve lived in the third world country, and I know that it takes lot less to deposit more inner happiness in my Bank of Life. If I am mindful for a day to buy only what I need and not what I want, I’m feeling calmness and peace that comes from within.

Less working:

I’ve always struggled with this habit. It’s manifested my life to a degree that I’ve become addicted to setting goals and seeking external pleasure by setting higher goals to spend more time working for those goals. I’m mindful for a day to turn off the laptop and head back home no matter what happens. I’ve now realized that life moves on. It has allowed me to develop inner consciousness about the goals and their relevance to my new mantra of life.

Less Ego:

An ego is an excess form of time spent on self-centric thoughts. I’m not against having an ego. Without an ego, we can not instill burning desire to achieve what we conceive. It’s excess that takes time away from my purpose to invest time for the inner happiness. With excess in ego comes the root of an evil; It kills the veins of morality leading to horrible act of self-indulgence. If I’m mindful about keeping my ego in the closet when I leave home, I’m nurturing the mind of magnanimity.

Less Obsessive thinking:

We’ve all been victim of this viral state of mind. We choose our thoughts and focus our attention to those thoughts. It’s that very decision we make to choose and obsess with thoughts of events that went wrong on the day, lack of forgiveness for the mistakes we’ve made on the day that leads us to misery and despair. With new mantra, I’m mindful about the thoughts I choose and thoughts I harbor. By allowing mind to relax with yoga and meditation, I’ve learned to focus on thoughts of content and not on the contempt.

Less Pleasures:

External pleasures always imbibe our inner pleasure. I do not drink or smoke, but I’ve habit of drinking a can of diet coke a day. I’m more mindful on a day to avoid these chemically altered drinks to invest my time to deposit more inner pleasures in my Life Bank. I’m feeling more energy and higher state of awakening due to seeking pleasure from within.

Less People Pleasing:

Keeping up with Joneses is the norm in the modern day society. It’s both sad and disdainful to live life just to seek approval of others. If I know myself well and accept myself deeply, I don’t need approval of others. People pleasing is a form of external happiness that’s as fake as a mirage. Pleasing my inner self allows me to invest time to deposit eternal happiness in my Bank of Life. It also allows me to eliminate the emotional clutter I’ve deposited in the form of rejection by others who indeed have no interest in investing time to deposit more inner happiness in my life. I’m mindful for a day to do what pleases my inner self and care less for what others opined about my decision to do so.

Photo by: Sandy*s

According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than doing the eulogy. — Jerry Seinfeld

Do you believe that fear of public speaking ranks higher than the fear of death? Indeed it does according to the comedian Jerry Seinfeld. We all have self-imposed taboos in our lives. We avoid many things in life without exploring the thrill of it because of the phobic sense of failure that only exists in our mind. We relish the beauty of a mountain but dread the thought of climbing that same mountain;we gaze in awe at the gliders and feel the sheer joy of surfing the sky but we never give it a try.

Have you ever pondered that this act of self-imposed limitation has imprisoned you not to  dream and to succeed beyond your wildest imagination? Have you ever felt the pressure of self focused thoughts prohibiting you from picking up a microphone in a public gathering to crack few jokes? We all have.

The simple fact is that our financial success largely relies on our skill to articulate our ideas either at work or in the business. Knowledge is vital for success but knowledge about how to sell knowledge is even of greater importance in any endeavor.

What if you were to know that the “King of Comedy”, the man who defined and ruled the late night talk show with his art of public speaking, Johnny Carson, was frightened every night for thirty years before going on stage only to keep millions of viewers in America watching the ‘Late Night’ show before going to bed?

How to Master the Art of Public Speaking

Public speaking is an art — it can be learned. Johnny Carson had mastered this craft with his passion, the practice of writing jokes, and his willingness to learn every facet of public engagement with hard work behind the curtain that was seldom ever mentioned in the tabloids.

I’ve had a phobic sense of shyness since early on in my life. At every public gathering, I focused on myself intensely. This obsessive self-focus created an imaginary stonewall for my natural expressions. I often lacked the words when asked to speak and became speechless at times in front of even a small group of people. I found myself confirming self-imposed stereotypes of my inept skill at public speaking, and would be scared when an opportunity came along to speak at another event. Soon I realized this fact and learned the skills to speak anywhere without a speck of fear in my mind.

You can also squash the bug of fear and self-imposed restrictions if you believe that the art of public speaking is something you can conquer and master with your audacity to connect with the audience and to speak from your heart about the subject with facts and humor. After all, Johnny Carson has become an American legend by just doing that.

Technique # 1. Connect with your audience quickly.

“Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.” — Johnny Carson

Have you felt exasperated while patiently waiting for your laptop to connect to your wireless network? Have you felt the knock out punch of sadness when you realized that you are out of luck while trying to surf the internet? These things happen in a matter of minutes. Public speaking is no different when it comes to the time that you have to connect with and surf the minds of the listeners in front of you.

If you wobble in the first few minutes, you haven’t yet lost the battle but if you don’t do anything about it, you surely will. Johnny Carson worked tirelessly on his monologues that often encompassed the heartbeats of America. He connected with 20 millions viewers worldwide with the magic of his words. He championed the art of the monologue to the degree that during the monologue of 19 December 1973, he said — “You know what’s disappearing from the supermarket shelves? Toilet paper! There’s an acute shortage of toilet paper in the United States.” Astonishingly, the very next morning, his 20 million viewers attempted to buy all the toilet paper that existed in the market only to find Johnny Carson later apologizing for his joke. Practice every speech with a breath-taking yet factual opening statement. You are on your way to dominate the minds in front of you if you open the speech with what matters most to them. Johnny always focused on the interviewees and his audience.

Technique # 2. Remember that you are an entertainer.

“I can’t say I ever wanted to become an entertainer. I already was one, sort of – around the house, at school, doing my magic tricks, throwing my voice and doing Popeye impersonations. People thought I was funny; so I kind of took entertaining for granted… It was inevitable that I’d start giving little performances.” — Johnny Carson

When you are out there at the podium, it’s overwhelming to focus on that thousands of faces are staring at you and every gesture you are making. You are not alone in feeling the pinch. The greats like Johnny felt the same way speaking in front of his 20 million viewers. How did he overcome the dread? — With his genuine sense of humor and knowing the fact that he was an entertainer for all of those who wanted to learn the news of the day with fun. It’s his deftness to blend sensational news with a touch of fun that left millions spellbound for every bit of a Johnny Carson show. Always remember that you are an entertainer even if you are talking about the next release of Windows Vista in front of none other than Bill Gates. Add a spice of humor into your facts and you’ll make an instant recipe for public domination. Some call it charisma but it’s nothing more than a ticket to own the minds that are craving for some fun along the way.

Technique # 3. Be hilarious by poking fun at yourself.

“If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.” — Johnny Carson

All of us have met personal failures at various stages in our lives. We eagerly share those moments with close friends as we feel a close bond with them about our feelings and emotional ties. Johnny Carson used this simple axiom of life to create an instant emotional bond with millions of his viewers by cracking jokes about his marital problems. He had three failed marriages. He used the blips in his personal life to his advantage by sharing that he was among us. He faced the same challenges in his life as any other American who otherwise considered him immune from the fate of an average Joe. He not only made millions of people laugh at seemingly sour moments but also established an instant rapport with them by winning their credibility. His audience felt a simmer of honesty in every joke he cracked about his own marital problems. Use the difficulties you’ve faced to your advantage by sharing it with your audience with a burst of laughter. You’ll be amazed at the power of clarity that ensues.

If anyone was the butt of Carson’s humor, it was Carson himself. — David Edelstein on Johnny Carson

Technique # 4. What’s in it for your audience?

“Democracy is buying a big house you can’t afford with money you don’t have to impress people you wish were dead.” — Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson’s legendary success to win the hearts of millions of viewers who viewed him with the zeal of a cult lies in his innate desire to know and bring to the spotlight the core issues of an average American. He never had a dearth of money but he never lost sight of the message of simplicity and common sense that he considered important for his audience. He constantly worked on and mastered the art of enabling his audience to relate to him and the message he was relaying to them with the touch of humor. He treated his audience with utmost respect and transparency. Never lose focus of the fact that you have to enable your audience to relate to you and to the core of your speech. Try to interject relevant life experiences that you have dealt with before to show a sense of transparency with your audience. One of the best ways to connect with your audience is to become astory-teller like Johnny Carson who had deftness to blend natural wit with his ability to perceive humor in everyday situations.

Technique # 5. Change your perception.

“Talent alone won’t make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: Are your ready?” — Johnny Carson

One of the best ways to master the art of public speaking is to change our perception of audiences — from our natural tendency to seeing them as our critics as opposed to our friends  — who have genuine interest  in our success as a speaker. After all, if the gathered audience has bestowed you with generosity of their time to listen to you, why would they want you to fail at the podium? Johnny Carson was an aloof person while not in front of the camera. His persona on the show was quite opposite to how he lived his life when the lights went off. Nonetheless, he was the “King of Comedy” for the very reason that he knew that an average viewer wanted to have a hearty laugh before calling an end to their day. He acknowledged that his viewers were happy to hand him the tough job of entertainment and silently they were rooting for him at every joke he cracked. It’s no different for you when it comes to public speaking. Most listeners are glad that you have taken the hard job of entertaining the audience and, contrary to your self-imposed belief.

Technique # 6. Have a blast.

“And so it has come to this. I am one of the lucky people in the world. I found something that I always wanted to do and I have enjoyed every single minute of it.” — Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson knew well that one cannot rule the hearts of millions and make them laugh every night unless he immersed the best of his talent and had a blast. Johnny Carson had over 20 million viewers twenty-five years ago not just for being the best at making these viewers chuckle but also for enjoying every moment of his own late night show. If you don’t enjoy your speech, if you are not investing in your own words, no one else will either. You can have wealth of wisdom yet fail miserably at the podium for being too pedantic and boring. Your audience yearns for the imperfect words of passion more than the flawless speech of a robot. Take the focus off of yourself. Let your identity vanish when you are at the podium. If you remember to speak just to have a good time, you’ll flourish as a speaker. It is natural to feel the burden of self-focus that exists when you pick up the microphone but remember that no one cares much about a single speech for too long. Instead of focusing on the dread that makes your lips quiver, focus on those eagerly waiting to receive a genuine joke from you. Your intensive focus on receiving applause and respect from an audience should serve should be replaced by your focus on  giving value to your audience with a genuine sense of sparkling wit and fun.

Technique # 7. Practice, Practice, Practice.

“My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.” — Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson worked tirelessly to craft a perfect stage presence. He edited his own jokes. He practiced his opening monologue. He relentlessly worked on his golf swing, his timing, delivery, and gestures. All of the hard work made him the “King of Comedy”. If you prepare your speech thoroughly by researching what your audience likes, by researching the local facts most relevant to your audience, you will feel confident at the podium. Remember, Johnny Carson made a plethora of errors but only he knew the content. You have a natural advantage. You are in control of what you say. If you miss a few words or a few facts, your audience is unaware of that. Join your local toastmaster club. Master the art of public speaking by finding your own style, gestures and a method that allows you to remember the key parts of your speech.

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. –Mark Twain (1835-1910) U.S. humorist, writer, and lecturer.

As opposed to a prevailing myth, mastery in public speaking is not confined to an élite few. By learning from the likes of Johnny Carson, you can transform your numb silence into confident, fluent public speaking. Are you ready?

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex… It takes a touch of genius — and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction. — Albert Einstein

We often associate certain names to the virtue of excellence. Tiger Woods to the game of golf, Michael Jordan to the game of basketball and Pablo Picasso to painting. What if you had to name the genius of the 20th century? Without a doubt, Albert Einstein gets the nod.

Arguably, the smartest man ever born, Albert Einstein was average at best in his school years. He shunned certain classes for the mediocrity of education. He mocked some teachers who were irritated by his lack of obedience. His Greek grammar teacher, Joseph Degenhart, achieved immortality in the history books through insisting that “nothing would ever become of you.” Later, when Einstein was told it would be best if he left the school, Degenhart had explained, “Your presence in the class destroys the respect of the students.” Disgusted by the rote teaching, he quit high school at the age of fifteen. The rest is history.

This man of great scientific feats also was a man of a noble heart and uncanny wisdom that he gained from the school of hard knocks. He often struggled to pay bills until the age of 26 when he wrote three papers that revolutionized our world.

Lesson # 1  Invest in the success of others.

In his famous essay, the world as I see it, Albert Einstein wrote, “ A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving…”

Those who succeed in life understand that success comes to those who make conscious effort everyday to give back to the friends, family and the community. As silly as it sounds, when we invest our life energy to ensure the success of others, our karma ensures our own success. Blogging is a great example. I have found that when I take time to uplift other bloggers by reading their articles, I surely get pleasantly surprised by countless bloggers who take time to visit my blog and to comment on my articles.

Lesson # 2  Never stop growing.

“Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.”

Albert Einstein’s dislike for the traditional schooling never had any influence on his passion for learning. His life is a remarkable example for the mankind. A life of solitude and self-learning made him a scientist of the century. He passionately explored the nature and its vastness to seek answers to mysteries that intrigued his mind through out his life. He felt religious not in a traditional sense but in the sense that rekindled his curiosity to know the wonders of the nature only to benefit mankind. In our life we learn by meeting different people, by exploring our ideas to solve the common issues and by relentless desire to improve our way of life. Personally, I have learned the lessons of life only after I left the school.

Lesson # 3  Your life is limited by limits of your thoughts.

“Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.”

We are educated to consider life with a logic. We learn how to get from A to B with excellence but we equally abhor thoughts of charting our own course to get from A to B. We are taught to excel at knowledge that already exists. We are infused with the fear of self-doubt to even consider an alternate path. History has shown that those who contributed the most to the mankind were the ones who defied the knowledge of masses. They dared to imagine what was considered impossible at the time. In the 6th century BC Greek mathematician Pythagoras said that earth is round; but few agreed with him. Greek astronomer Aristarchos said in the 3rd century BC that earth revolves around the sun; but the idea was not accepted.

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.“
~ Confucius

Lesson # 4  Simplify everything you do.

“If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.”

Often those prestigious institutions publish papers with laborious details and content aimed to disparage most people. Life is simple and those who succeed in life definitely master the art of simplicity in everything that they passionately do. Warren Buffet was once asked why he is not investing in Microsoft despite being a close friend of Bill Gates. He answered that I don’t invest if I don’t understand the underlying business. The answer of the genius investor speaks volume about the importance of knowledge that he can transpire to his investors in simple words.

Few years ago I read a memoir of one of the most brilliant and prolific authors, James Michener. In his memoir, The World Is My Home, author revealed the secrets of writings from his vantage point. One sentence left a profound influence in my mind. He wrote:“Good writing…consists of trying to use ordinary words to achieve extraordinary results.”

All of our wisdom and knowledge dies a horrible death if we do not possess the deftness of expressing our knowledge in simple words to the rest of the world.

Lesson # 5 Live a simple Life.

In his famous essay, the world as I see it, Albert Einstein wrote, “The trite objects of human efforts — possessions, outward success, luxury — have always seemed to me contemptible.”

One of the myths of our society is that “more” will make us “happier”. We invest our life energy to possess lifeless possessions. We are educated to foster consumption with the mantra of – “The more, the better.” We are educated to have a great job. A great job requires luxuries to fulfill our outlandish desire to impress others. Before we realize, we mortgage our freedom to the possessions that bring more sorrow and inner grief in a vain hope to show off to the masses. Life of happiness and inner peace rests upon the virtue of simplicity. Our efforts in life should be directed towards saving our life energy and towards using our life energy that can bring eternal happiness to ourselves. Seldom our schools teach the value of living a simple life. Seldom our schools teach value of living within our means. The current sub prime mortgage crisis is an awakening lesson for all of us. It’s madness to chase goals of accumulating more possessions. We often find ourselves in same despair once we achieve our goal by the feelings of not possessing what others have. It’s an endless loop of self-pity. Life of contentment fills our hearts with eternal happiness.

Lesson # 6 Never quit!

“It’s not that I’m so smart , it’s just that I stay with problems longer .”

Our traditional education rewards those who succeed in exhibiting their knowledge of books. Students with power of memory rather than creativity are rewarded for their stupendous bookish knowledge. Our dislike for failure comes from the years of schooling that abhors failures. We limit our thoughts without knowing the fake reality of knowledge that restricts our imagination with the fear of failures. Albert Einstein’s passion for the physics and his dislike for the traditional schooling allowed him to become the greatest scientist of the 20th century. History has countless examples of the successful people who never ceased to imagine what intrigued their mind. Success comes to those in abundance who dare to imagine and solve the mysteries of the nature to benefit the mankind. These brave people understand the value of failure to gain knowledge that can lead to the peaks of success.

Lesson # 7 We are creatures of our values and character

“Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value.”

We learn to succeed in life. In fact we have idolized the success to an extent that every bookstore carries plethora of books on success. We flock seminars that sell success themes to our feeble minds. Our culture adores success to an extent that thoughts of failure shakes our strongest will to imagine and try to explore new ideas. The reality is a far outcry from our fake belief. My father failed in business many times in his life. He always bounced back from the lows. He credited his resilience to the virtue of value and character. He faced many obstacles in life, but he never had lack of compassion and support from his friends as they had unshakable faith in my father’s value and character. In today’s world, “get quick rich” mantra shuns the virtues of value and character. We all know that a man without values and character is doomed to fail miserably in life.

“I have never looked upon ease and happiness as ends in themselves — this critical basis I call the ideal of a pigsty. The ideals that have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully,have been Kindness, Beauty, and Truth.”
~Albert Einstein, the world as I see it

So, from the school of hard knocks, Albert Einstein taught us to work selflessly for others, to never stop growing our mind, to love our imagination, to make our thoughts simple enough for others to understand, to live life of simplicity, to never quit no matter what it takes to succeed and above all, live life of highest values and character. Are you a graduate of Einstein’s school of hard knocks? I’d love to know…

Photo by: Smithsonian Institute

To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities. — Bruce Lee

Have you pondered lately about your own worth? Your own contentment for who you are?Have you felt that your life’s on a roller coaster with the booze of emotions? Have started some days on the mountains of ecstasy only to feel fallen down in the valley of self-pity? You are not alone.

Just like you, I’m reflecting daily on my desire to develop a street smart, kick-ass attitude filled with positivity. Your income, success and fulfillment survives and thrives by the kick-ass attitude. Your life vampires — ego, emotional vices, hatred, despair and negativity dread to face your kick-ass attitude.

A, Street Smart, Black Belt in Attitude

Have you ever ridden on a roller coaster? Do you remember the jolt of happiness you felt when the ride began? You were fearless, happy and immersed in the moment. Do you remember screaming later on? Or even shouting out loud? Your reality changed in the split second. You became a chicken from a ninja in matter of minutes. With the change of your reality, your attitude changed. All of these happened in matter of minutes. What you want to become with the kick-ass attitude is to learn not to change your inner reality when going gets tough.

Who is the most smashing champion of “Kick-Ass” attitude? No other name comes close to the greatness of Bruce Lee for that matter. In his short life, Bruce Lee has been remembered as the father of the modern day martial art. I’ve also stumbled upon his mastery of thoughts on the way of life - to think like a street smart with the Kick-Ass attitude.

Bruce Lee’s black belt, kick-ass attitude acts as a shield to your inner reality of positivity and optimism. It’s a warrior that insures your thoughts from getting attacked by the evil of negativity. It’s a certification of mental steadfastness to wither the worst of outer reality to remain calm and confident with the mastery of focus - on what we can control and let go what we cannot.

1. Focus on what matters the most. ~

“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.” – Bruce Lee

What we become in life begins with the reality we create in our mind. Everything we do in our life is a reflection of what we feed our mind with. A healthy body is a reflection of a healthy diet. A healthy mind is a reflection of healthy thoughts. We waste priceless life energy by focusing our thoughts on things we cannot change – the economy, the gas price to name a few. We can certainly transform our lives by investing our priceless life energy into what we can change – by setting realistic goals that can be measured and by working hard until those goals become a reality. Work on one goal at a time and immersed yourself with best of your ability and most noble intentions. You’ll be amazed at uplifting and positive attitude of your own as a result.

2. Come out of “Me, Me, Me” shell ~

“Real living is living for others.” – Bruce Lee

It’s easy to get lost in the incessant desire to lock all of our thoughts into a “me” shell. Our desire for the more throws us into a never ending roller coaster ride of emotions of highs and lows in matter of a short time span. Sadly enough, our attitude is always a loyal servant to our egotistical desires. When we do something for others, we give freedom to our thoughts. Our thoughts grow with the food of positivity that we feed by making difference in some-one’s life. Life is an echo. What we do comes back to us. The more we give to others, the more we receive from the universe. Our attitude fires up with the higher self-worth and feeling of contentment that comes from within. The subtle yet the profound change begins to take place in our mind. We feel happy with enough and learn to let go our yearning for the more.

3. Control your mental chatter ~

“Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless – like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup, you put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, you put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.” – Bruce Lee

We have a formidable foe who never leaves us. He’s there when we are awake and never sleeps when we are at sleep. He talks to us constantly. He tells us how we shall program our mind. In fact, he is the chief programmer of our mind, a Chief Technical Officer of our life. He’s the invisible devil who chatters with our mind. When we drive and if a car comes close, he’s chatting madness. When we speak with a friend and if our friend disagrees with us, this devil chatters with our mind, “Hell with this guy, he is stupid.” He creates a fake reality in our mind about what we see and experience everyday. He’s in full control. You can squash this devil if you learn to free up your mind. Listen to others when they speak intently, bury emotions that sprung out of the mental chatter with a smile. You’ll soon become the master of your invisible foe. Your upbeat attitude will squash any mental chatter that tend to bore negative attitude.

4. Strive to live the life of values and transparency ~

“If you make an ass out of yourself, there will always be someone to ride you” – Bruce Lee

Our attitude is a selfless, loyal servant of our own desires. Our attitude grows with our own desire to live the values that we strive for in our life. Often those who succumb to the “me-centered” thoughts sell their values and transparency for the sake of achieving a life of possessions. What they forget in their pursuit of collecting those possessions is that they become possessed by the same possessions they brag most about. It’s easy to fool others but equally harder to fool our own inner consciousness. The road taken to shortcut the pathway to success ends up with the obstacles of major bumps from the diminished self value. A life of integrity and transparency leads to the longer yet pleasant journey to the peaks of success with picturesque view of your beautiful inner self. The choice is yours to make.

5. Set achievable goals ~

“As you think, so shall you become.” – Bruce Lee

A lousy attitude is an outer expression of our metal clutter. When we don’t have a clarity in life, when we don’t take time to develop a worthy purpose driven by achievable goals that we can monitor and measure, we tend to play the blame game – We tend to blame the world for our state of being, we blame our partner for every hiccup in our relationship, we blame our boss for not making more money.. You get the idea. We tend to focus our thoughts on the blemish desire to hold others accountable for our apathetic, loser attitude. The good news is that we can change all of that in matter of minutes. All we need to do is to understand the axiom of life - We are where we are is the culmination of our thoughts and actions thus far. That can be changed as easily as a sailor changes the navigation of his boat. Take control of your destiny. If you don’t, someone else will definitely be in charge for the better or worst of your fate yet to come.

6. Stay away from the influence of negativity ~

“If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made up of.” - Bruce Lee

Time is the most precious treasure we have. We can make more of other things in life but we cannot make more time. With our short journey on this earth, we shall always be mindful about spending our time with and for the positivity in our life. Our life constantly evolves. We grow up with friends and relatives who sometimes are negative. As much as we love them for their relationship with us, We shall never allow their toxic emotions to influence our thoughts. I keep a journal of my life with the events of the day that I can reflect upon to understand the subtle influence of negativity in my life. Without the awareness, negativity creeps into our mind with deftness of a robber to rob our passion and purpose. Be conscious about every conversation that you engage in with your friend or a family member and cut short those conversations of negativity swiftly to spend your time on the worthy causes of life - clarity and inner happiness.

Parting Thought

Attitude is a choice. We cannot control what happens to us, but we can certainly control how we react to it. Bruce Lee believed in the life of offense with a “Kick-Ass” attitude of positivity. If we constantly work on -

~ Our consciousness to be aware of the thoughts we focus on

~ Strive to do something for others

~ Control our own metal chatter of negativity

~ Live the life of utmost values and transparency

~ Set achievable goals and work hard on them

~ Learn to stay away from our emotional vices

We will earn a street smart diploma from the Bruce Lee’s Institute of “Kick-Ass” attitude.

Photo by: Coolkew 

Have you found yourself riding on the emotional tidal wave when you stumbled upon an interesting idea for several days only to end up flirting with another idea that intrigued your mind with the touch of magic? What made you abandon the original idea as an after thought or a bad dream? Have you changed jobs or businesses often in the vain hope of striking the passion of you life? You are not alone.

It’s a contagious disease that has intoxicated the brightest among us. It’s a maelström in our own mind that can reduce our mighty ambition to a measly hallucination. It is the awesome power of our own mind working against us by throwing us into the whirling depths of watery self-doubt and self-sabotage to achieve a fraction of what we are born to achieve.

I’m ceaselessly amazed to witness the brightest people with the highest IQs living mediocre lives at best while those with an IQ of 75 achieve things beyond our wildest imagination.

The secret lies in these two words —Self-Confidence.

If I have to think of a role model to prove the fallacy of IQ when it comes to human achievement, Forrest Gump leads the pack. He received the Congressional Medal of Honor, became the world ping-pong champion, got President Nixon impeached, built a national shrimping empire — made a fortune with his investment in Apple Computers, and, last but not least, taught Elvis how to dance!

How did Forrest Gump achieve these incredible feats with a mediocre IQ? He achieved these feats by his mastery of self-confidence — his yearning for the positive outcome and his ability to defy the failures by his willingness to persist and try harder.

Lesson # 1. Never allow imagination to hold you hostage.

My Momma always said, “Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” – Forrest Gump

We have to learn to visualize our success. When we embark upon an idea or a goal, we are told to constantly visualize the end result. It may have some truth, but it also can be our Achilles Heel. Obsessive visualization creates a phobic sense of self-defense. We tend to harbor a creature of our mind called “self-doubt.” Often we feel paralyzed by this overwhelming sense of defeat that derails our visualization wagon. Forrest Gump had an obvious edge. With his limited power of imagination, he was boundless in his pursuit to keep working at his skill in catching shrimp. When we bite every chocolate of opportunity that comes our way without thinking about its taste, we learn to immerse the best of our ability with boundless energy that knows no defeat. The universe takes care of its part by delivering success to reverberate the power of our self-confidence.

Lesson # 2. Never label the outcome.

When I had to go… you know… I went. — Forrest Gump

Often with our higher IQ, we tend to subvert our focus and attention by engaging in the mindless game called – “Analysis of paralysis” After all, our smartness has to rein in its power, even if that ends up stealing our passion. Forrest Gump had a distinct advantage. With the IQ unworthy to possess smartness, Forrest Gump could do what he loved to do without analyzing the finest details of his actions. His actions were dictated by his passion. Forrest Gump spent days learning how to catch shrimp. He caught boots and license plates instead of shrimp but that didn’t shake his determination. His endless pursuit eventually made him a fortune with his shrimp empire. Success comes to those who have an attitude to keep doing what they love and to do it long and hard enough.

Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings.
– Samuel Johnson (1709-1784) British author.

Lesson # 3. Claim your confidence.

Now you wouldn’t believe me if I told you, but I could run like the wind blows. — Forrest Gump

We all have a companion, which follows us more than our own shadow. The moment we wake up till going to bed, this companion chatters with our mind. It is more destructive than our worst foe by constantly dragging us into the pit of negativity. “I can’t do it!,”, “I’m never going to succeed!,”,” How am I going to pay my bills?,”, and so on. If we don’t believe in ourselves, who else will? If we constantly undermine ourselves with negative self-talk, soon it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Guard your mind with your strong suits or accomplishments when the influx of negative waves sweeps through your mind. Forrest Gump knew how to run, and he shamelessly bragged about it. We can double up our self confidence simply by reminding ourselves what we can do rather than throwing ourselves into a bull pit of self-pity.

Lesson # 4. Do something for others.

Jenny taught me how to climb. And I taught her how to dangle. — Forrest Gump

Obsessive thoughts of ego nurturing elevate your own imaginary woes to decimate your self confidence. When we focus on others, we develop thoughts of positivity and tranquility. Our positivity transcends our own woes and transforms our attitude to one filled with passion and self confidence. Another aspect of giving is receiving. As paradoxical as it sounds, by giving – we receive from others the act of kindness with interest. We are destined to climb the mountains of our life with an abundance of self-confidence if we help others while they are “dangling” from their own tree of life.

Lesson # 5. Always give your best effort.

“YES DRILL SERGEANT!”
– Forrest Gump’s response to sergeant’s claim that he had set a company record for assembling rifles.

The easiest way to crucify our self-confidence is by doing less than what we can. Most people don’t achieve greatness not because they are less smart or less intellectual than those who achieve greatness — they simply give less than the best of their untapped energy to whatever they pursue in life. Regardless of the fate of the outcome, the way you really feel about yourself matters most in life. When we are excited about our work and give it our best, everyone around us feels positive vibes from us. Our positive attitude generates new energy for all of those who work with us. Forrest Gump could have replied to the comment of the sergeant in a lackluster way with the gentle reply, “Yes Sir”. Instead, he chose to portray an abundance of positivity with his response. Try this form of attitude for several days in your personal and professional life and see for yourself the astounding results it produces.

Lesson # 6. Maintain your integrity.

I gotta save Bubba! — Forrest Gump

Integrity to our self-confidence is like what oxygen is to our survival. When we try to fool ourselves, we are depriving soul nourishment to our self-confidence. How can I stand tall if my act is so short? How can I dream big when my thoughts are spiraling down in the depths of self-pity? Our acts of benevolence come back to us in multiple ways by our giving to others. Forrest Gump made Bubba his partner posthumously and made sure to share the profit with his family when he built a successful Bubba Gump shrimp empire. He never forgot the fact that it was his friend Bubba who inspired him to go into the shrimp business.

Lesson # 7. Run to lead.

My momma always said you can tell a lot about a person by their shoes, where the go, where they’ve been. I’ve worn lots of shoes, I bet if I think about it real hard I can remember my first pair of shoes. — Forrest Gump

Running creates a wave of excitement within and around us. The natural act of running breeds a great sense of positivity in our attitude and the way we view our life. Even those who add a little pep in their walk feel a jolt of positive feelings by creating an impression that they are on an exciting journey — to learn and to achieve more in life. The Universe never fails to respond positively to these people. When Forrest Gump ran three times across the nation, he found loyal followers running behind him. Amazingly enough, when he stopped, they stopped to hear the words of wisdom from a guy with an IQ of 75.

Once we believe in ourselves, others will begin to believe in us. Once we place a high value on our self-confidence, others will surely bid our value even higher. When was the last time you felt proud of yourself? When was the last time you felt great about the fact that you are unique; that there was never anyone like you before and that there will never be anyone like you ever again?

Those who believe that they are exclusively in the right are generally those who achieve something.
– Aldous Huxley (1894-1963) British author.

Have you felt the fear of reality that has not yet been born? Have you surrendered your dreams when you felt cornered by the ghost of fear? We all have.

In the midst of the storms of your life, remember that the only problem you have to deal with is – choosing the right thoughts and facing the storm of adversity with a sense of adventure and laughter.

Who can better teach us how to dominate adversity by doing just that? Only one name comes to my mind — Charlie Chaplin

Born to an alcoholic father and a mother who suffered spells of madness, Charlie Chaplin was supposed to be written off by the society; and indeed most people were dismissive of him. However, the first ever-cinematic genius knew that the power of thoughts and laughter could overcome seemingly insurmountable challenges in life. History attests to his wisdom.

A star was born from an unhappy childhood to make three silent movies — The Gold Rush, Modern Times and City Lights that made it to the top of the American Film Institute’s 100 greatest films of all times. The secret of his greatness was in his power to be concerned about the problems he faced but not to worry about them and in his iron will to stay the course when he faced political scrutiny for some of the ideas portrayed in his films.

Concern means to be aware of the adversity and having the poise to overcome it. Worrying means spiraling down in the abyss of despair with a defeatist mindset.

You’ll never find rainbows if you’re looking down. — Charlie Chaplin

When we are conditioned by our past, we are holding the promise of our future hostage. Living in the past means going around in maddening, futile circles, with no sign of hope for a better future. I have learned to view the past as a blueprint to build a better tomorrow. Life is an experiment. Our past should act as a template to write lessons learned and the chief aim should be to improve the odds of achieving our highest dreams. Charlie Chaplin lived in homeless shelters while his father was dying due to alcohol addiction and his mother was hospitalized for her mental illness. He proves that greatness knows no barriers. The only barrier we face is the limitations we impose on our self-belief. Our past can go with us only as long as we allow it to go. Without our permission, our past lives only exist in the pages of history. If you view your past as the best result of a noble effort, you will embrace it with as much love as you cuddle your newborn child. Let’s always remember to learn from it but never forget that we have to look high if we want to see the rainbow.

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot. — Charlie Chaplin

The irony of life lies in the fact that misfortunes strike the most cautious planners and the luckiest of gamblers. I’ve had more failures than successes in my life. ‘Failure’ is a label that we use to surrender our dreams with the feebleness of a lamb. In my life, despite countless setbacks, I have found that there’s always a lifeline to latch on to and to pull myself up with better and exciting opportunities that never existed in the past. When I felt nostalgic and decided to go back to my home country, India, a friend of mine reminded the reason I left the country was to prove my self-worth. I have never looked back since then. If we persist in our efforts through tragic circumstances, we are destined to hear the laughter of success.

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world — not even our troubles. — Charlie Chaplin

When troubles come, we feel cornered by hopelessness but even the worst of trouble can’t last forever. Troubles trigger a tsunami of worries that can make even the most stolid person ill. We know instinctively that a picturesque, sunny day will be gone as day ends but we don’t stop enjoying the moment till the dusk sets in. Why can’t we use this same knowledge — that these seemingly endless troubles will end soon and opportunities will follow. One of cinema’s greatest comedians, Charlie Chaplin, spent most of his childhood in and out of the workhouses for homeless children. He proves that no matter how difficult our circumstances, we can succeed in the face of adversity. He shows that if we believe, our troubles can shape our character to have an iron will. Instead of asking yourself, “Why am I the only one to face these troubles?” ask, “How can I overcome these troubles?” The answer lies within you and that is a resounding “Yes!” because life always gets better if you have faith, patience and the iron will to accomplish whatever it is that you desire.

You have to believe in yourself, that’s the secret. Even when I was in the orphanage, when I was roaming the street trying to find enough to eat, even then I thought of myself as the greatest actor in the world. —- Charlie Chaplin

No one has the power to thrust self-doubt upon you without your permission. Charlie Chaplin learned early on in his life that you can’t be stepped on forever unless you agree to lie down willingly to let others step all over you. He didn’t cave in to the defeatist thoughts to surrender his staunch belief that he was the greatest actor in the world, even when he struggled to barely survive in his early life. It is easy to willingly be swept away in the storm of self-pity when adversity surrounds you, but it is equally important to remember that your thoughts can shield you from the worst of difficulties as long as you believe in yourself. Your self-worth is as high as your highest thoughts. When I started out in the hotel business I was told by countless friends that it was too risky and that I had no experience to manage a business- but I was determined to succeed no matter what it takes. I have never regretted my decision. Don’t allow others who have stayed at the shoreline to teach you how to swim across the ocean of life. Throughout my life when failures led me into darkness, my self-belief rescued me with new ideas and opportunities that never existed before.

Life is a beautiful magnificent thing, even to a jelly fish. … The trouble is you won’t fight. You’ve given up. But there’s something just as inevitable as death. And that’s life. Think of the power of the universe — turning the earth, growing the trees. That’s the same power within you — if you’ll only have the courage and the will to use it. — Charlie Chaplin

The antidote to adversity is the power to succeed. I was overwhelmed by the power of the universe when I held my daughter for the first time in my hands. I had an epiphany. Her beautiful face made me realize that we are all born complete with the power of universe that turns the earth and grows the trees. We have everything we need to achieve the loftiest of our dreams if we recognize the power that lies within. It was the realization that what happens to the world begins with you. Unfortunately, we decide to allow others to define who we are. If Charlie Chaplin had allowed the society to define his value, he would have been lost with the other countless homeless children who never rose to their utmost potential. Despite lacking most of the resources needed to sustain a healthy life, he never wanted to live a life of a jellyfish — a person lacking backbone or firmness. I was written off by many who considered me a jellyfish before I set my own course to chart my personal destiny. And I have proved that life can be a beautiful, magnificent thing to even a jellyfish.

Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of oneself. — Charlie Chaplin

We shy away from things that intrigue our mind and never even try as we consider the importance to avoid a failure more important than having courage to do what inspires us most. When we receive a result other than what we wanted , we label it as a failure and deny ourselves the power to think and act on our own behalf. Instead, we yield to others the ability to create our opinion of ourselves. We value failure itself higher than our courage to overcome it. Charlie Chaplin never ceased to portray ideas that he believed in even when he faced political scrutiny and eventual deportation from America. Why allow others to build or destroy our self-worth only to win their approval? Why give someone else an opportunity to drop an anchor over your shoulders and weigh you down? Why allow the words “I can’t” and “I wish I could” to squash your loftiest dreams?

Life is to be lived to the fullest. Why not find at least one positive outcome from the debris of adversity and focus on the positive to rebuild your dream? As hard as it seems, the power lies within you. Before you give up on swimming the ocean of life, remember that life is a beautiful thing even to a jellyfish.

             Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain. — Charlie Chaplin

How do you deal with adversity? Let’s have a conversation.

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