Surviving the Cubicle

Serenity

2011-07-15T21:39:00.002-04:00

Alcoholics and other addicts (and let's face it, to one degree or another, we are all addicts) are not the only ones who need the serenity prayer:

Everyone who works in an office and has to deal with other people on a regular basis should know this prayer. At sometime and/or someplace, we will be pushed to our limits.

Take a deep breath. Count to 10. Recite the serenity prayer.

And when you go home at night, before you walk through the door to confront your family, recite this prayer to yourself.

Your loved ones did not cause your problems at work. They do not deserve anger and abuse for your difficult day. Rejoice if you have loved ones. Open yourself to love if you do not currently have loved ones.

Philadelphia and SEPTA hate the middle class and working people

2011-07-09T18:40:00.012-04:00

SEPTA: South East Pennsylvania Transportation Authority

I commute five days, every week, back and forth to work in downtown Philadelphia on buses and trains (the El or Broad Street Line). Most people are like me, they just want to get back and forth to work with a minimum amount of hassle. However, there is a minority (not a small minority) of jerks who should not be allowed to ride on SEPTA.

Where did these incredibly rude, obnoxious, ignorant slobs grow up? Were they raised in barns? (Probably not, the livestock in barns are usually cleaner and better behaved.) When I get on a SEPTA bus or train, I have to worry if the pants I'm wearing are too light in color. The seats are ususally, filthy from their previous inhabitants. (Here's a thought: do not put your filthy disgusting feet on a seat someone else may want to use,)

To those who play their MP3 players, Iphones, Ipads, etc. without earphones (or earphones everybody else has to listen to), may you rot in an exceptionally hot circle of hell. I don't want to listen to your music. Most of the music people as rude as you listen to is crap. Rap music is not music. It is bad poetry spoken to a beat that is repetitive and obnoxious, usually vulgar, violent and misogynistic. (Oops, sorry, most of the Philadelphia jackasses playing this music did not graduate high school; and, if you did graduate from a Philadelphia high school, too bad.) Misogynistic is a really big word [more than 3 letters] meaning you hate women. God forbid I use words the average Philadelphian jackass (you know, someone who went through the city's [if you will excuse the expression] school system) would know.

Also, when did it become typical to take the aisle seat and make people climb over you to sit down? Here's a thought, when you get on the bus or train, move into the seat closest to the window. Are you afraid of glass? It is incredibly rude to force people to ask if they can climb over you. Did you pay for two seats? Also, did crowding the exits of the El or Broad Street Line become fashionable when I wasn't looking? Why should I have to beg strangers to get out of my way when I want to get off the El? Do you not understand the purpose of mass transportation?

I understand, having grown up in New York City, that people in smaller cities are usually clueless (and we consider Philadelphians a bit [really a whole lot] on the slow side), but has'nt anybody in this clueless metropolis gotten the idea yet that NOBODY (with a middle income salary or higher) wants to live or visit here. People with jobs and salaries want out of this city.. Once they can afford to do so, they will leave. Good luck trying to run a city with nobody who has to pay taxes (the middle class has been leaving and will continue to do so). That is the direction Philadelphia is going. Good luck trying to run a city without money coming from its citizenry.

Here are some more thoughts for those of you I am forced to listen to on public transportation: I don't want to listen your therapy or outpatient or rehab details (I do not know you and do not care). Why do you think anybody on the bus or the El or the regional rails gives a crap? I also do not care if you are late for a court appearance, an interview with your parole officer or the abortion you need to kill the life you created without a second thought.

I grew up worrying about the effect these types of things might have on my own family. I really do not care if you can't handle them for your own. I do not pay the ridiculous amount I have to to SEPTA to care about your problems.

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying

2011-04-27T19:50:00.002-04:00

OK, I'm not totally freaked out, but getting close to it. Harry Potter is now J. Pierrepont Finch, or at least Daniel Radcliffe is. In my youth (yute, I'm from Brooklyn), Robert Morse was the epitome of the brash young soul, looking to rise in the corporate world. Later, Matthew Broderick took the lead (I think his wife, Sarah Jessica Parker, would have been a better choice). And now, Harry. In between Robert Morse and Matthew Broderick was another JPF, Warren Berlinger. Whatever happened to Warren? I remembe him from so many 1960's sitcoms. Apparently, Warren played JPF in London.

This musical, "How to Succeed in Business in Business Without Really Trying," is one of my all time favorite musicals. This musical, which arrived on Broadway in 1961, based on a book by Shepherd Mead, published in 1952 (the year I was born), and released as a movie in 1967, has withstood the test of time.

I have seen variations of this story over the years. The hero, J. Pierrepont Finch, is the "Everyman" of the corporate world. He's the one we all think we are. He's the one we all wish we were. He gets an entry-level job in a big company, and, with the help of a how-to, self-help, whatever manual, rises to the top of the corporate world in a couple of musical hours. I want that. I want to be chairman of the board in 2 hours.

What's frightening about this musical, is how little has changed in 50 years. Yes, you heard me, 50 YEARS. People today can watch this show and still relate to all/most of the issues covered (how sad). We still need/want our coffee, and hope/wish/desire it to be provided for free (Starbucks is great, but we still think free/cheap coffee at the office is an entitlement). We have passed the point where we think a secretary (female) is a toy. Unfortunately, now, both sexes now think the other sex is a toy (You can call someone an administrative assistant, but that still translates as secretary). What's wrong with the title "secretary" anyway? Kowtowing to the corporate entity still gets you ahead (I do it the company way!). Playing up to the boss still works ("Old Ivy"). Please let the day come when this is just a cute historical artifact.

The greatest song of theshow is still the "Botherhood of Man."

Snooze Spots and Power Naps to Survive Cubicle Life

2010-12-10T20:58:00.005-05:00

There was an excellent article by Anne Kadet on the online Wall Street Journal/New York site. The title was "Scoping Out Snooze Spots." Evidence shows that our abilities/sensitivities are impaired when we don't get enough sleep, but our culture honors and rewards those who skip the necessary daily requirement. According to the article, "the New York Post approvingly reported on so-called short sleepers—New Yorkers such as Martha Stewart and NY1 anchor Pat Kiernan, who get by on four hours a night."

So where can you snooze? Home is becoming increasingly difficult. Where are the kids? What activity are they at? Who is on a conference call with people in different time zones? If you travel for business, how well do you sleep on planes? I love the suggestions of the articles author:

"The Rose Main Reading Room at the New York Public Library turned out to be a better suggestion. Yes, it's against the rules to sleep there, but then why is it so lovely and hushed, with softly glowing table lamps and carved wooden chairs? The best spot: the three-row "laptop-free zone" in the back. Hardly anyone sits there. I plucked a fat book off the shelf ("History of the US Navy, Volume I") and pretended to study while I enjoyed a quick snooze. Bliss.

I can also vouch for the mattress stores. Don't bother with Sleepy's: The bright lights and pushy salespeople make sleep impossible. Instead, try Duxiana, on Broadway. There's a private chamber in the back, where, a store manager once told me, customers often doze off.

Another option: the expansive and dimly lit fifth-floor Mattress Gallery at Bloomingdale's. I once spent two hours there testing the wares, and the sales clerk never objected. Still, a Bloomingdale's spokeswoman insists that the gallery isn't for nappers. A better place for a break, she says, is at the store's "five fantastic restaurants, four of which also serve cocktails."

Let's face it, there are no perfect solutions. When my wife and I were adopting our daughter from China, someone raised the question about how long after the trip they would stop feeling tired. The answer was about two weeks after their daughter left for college.

I do love Anne's closing paragraph:
"A mid-day bender sounds tempting. But in the end, I found that the best place to take a nap was under my desk, George Costanza style. We have an open office, with zero privacy and overhead TVs. But once I had barricaded myself behind the trash and recycling bins, things felt nice and cozy. I forgot to set my timer and wound up taking a 90-minute snooze. When I woke, it was almost quitting time. The best part? Naps are twice as nice when everyone around you is working."

Cubicle dwellers need to be particularly creative. Who's watching?

Cubicles versus offices

2010-07-10T13:26:00.000-04:00

I have worked in many environments. I have worked for state and federal governments. I have worked for small, medium and large companies, and I have worked in academia. (I know, I know, it sounds like I can't hold a job.) I have worked at desks in large open offices, at cubicles (in what seemed like rat mazes), and in small offices that were either mine or shared with one or two other coworkers.

My experience has been that your perception of the space you work in has less to do with the amount of space and location than with your ambition. We are trained (indoctrinated) to believe that the bigger the space, the more isolated, the better the view, the better we are.

Most managers use their offices as weapons or defensive positions. Almost every manager I have ever had has touted their open door policy. Every manager touting an open door policy was full of s**t. The door is only open when it suits them. Usually, when the door is open, they're not there. Most managers use their offices as aplace to deposit papers and other paraphernalia while they attend an endless string of meetings. They know that if the door is closed, the people under them will only knock (or more likely make a phone call or email) if there is a dire emergency. Also, every worker knows that if you go into a manager's office, and they close the door, you are in trouble.

Most of the people I have known who work in cubicles were far more adaptable and productive than anyone in an office. Work in cubicles requires adaptable people who know how to get along with coworkers and work in teams to accomplish necessary tasks. People who thrive in cubicles can deal with the noise and other distractions. Chances are these people are also parents and have learned to adapt to similar conditions at home. My expereince has also been that the best cubicl workers are those with the least ambition for management positions. Manager wannabes are too focused on themselves and their ambition to thrive in a cubicle environment. These are the people who complain the most and loudest about cubicles. These are also the people who will complain about the size of their offices and the furniture and equipment in them until the day they reach that corner office on the top floor.

Fun desk accessories: Mug Boss

2009-12-18T20:24:00.004-05:00

Everybody should have a Mug Boss. No cubicle jockey should be without one. This fun desk accessory will not only help organize your desktop, it looks great too. I was recently sent one of these desktop organizers and am making good use of it at the office.

Everyone wants to be thought of as a professional, and what self-respecting professional would go without a tool box or tool tote. Whether you are a carpenter, electrician or desk jockey, you need a tool carrier that says "I work hard and I deserve your respect." The Mug Boss does this for you. This neat desk organizer is made by the same folks who produce the Bucket Boss, a widely used tool tote in the construction trades. It is also made of the same tough, rip-resistant fabric materials as the "Bucket Boss."

The idea for the Bucket Boss was brilliant. What to do with all those 5-gallon buckets that tradesmen accumulate? They already use them as tool and material carry-alls, why not develop a cheap bucket add-on to organize all that stuff and make it more visible? The combination of the bucket and boss is not only better organized and better looking than your typical cheap, plastic toolbox, it is also much sturdier.

Why shouldn't we desk jockeys also share in this brilliant concept? What do we have in the same abundance as tradesmen's buckets? Coffee cups of course. And just as tradesmen were loading up their buckets with tools, how many of us, in our cubicles, used those excess cups to hold pens, pencils, paper clips, etc. etc. Slap on a Mug Boss and organize those tools.

This desk accessory also makes a great present. Buy one for the cubicle dweller you love, or for the hobbyist in your life that uses small, specialized tools (e.g., electronics, scrapbooking, sewing, model making, etc.).This makes a great gift by itself, or add a set of the specialized tools your hobbyist uses.

For about 5 bucks, you can't go wrong.

This and many other fun desk and cubicle accessories can be purchased at a company called Gorilla Cube. These guys believe that improving your cubicle's environment will make the workplace less stressful, more fun and you more productive (OK, the less stressful and more fun is what WE are looking for, the more productive part is what you tell your boss the things you want in your cubicle will accomplish}.

See related:
Office Desk Accessories: fun cubicle desk accessories

Disclaimer: I am not an affiliate of Gorilla Cube. I do not get a commission if you buy one. However, I did get a Mug Boss to evaluate that I get to keep. Free or not, I think it is a fun item. I love the concept and the possibilities, and I'm keeping mine on my desk. It definitely will not be regifted. Also, I now have another gift idea for when I need to get something for a coworker.

Office and Cubicle Survival: Beer

2009-12-07T20:10:00.005-05:00

Surviving in a cubicle is tough. The surroundings are mind-numbing, the ventilation sucks, and you have no privacy, By the end of the day, you are tense, frustrated, and pretty much brain dead. You are also very thirsty. What do you do? Drink beer of course. Let's face it, you are not Nick and Nora Charles (the "Thin Man" and wife for the barbarians reading this). You don't make the rounds of the swankiest bars in New York drinking Martinis. You go home, change into jeans and sweat shirt, open the fridge, grab a can of your favorite brewski, plop into the couch or easy chair and watch the sitcoms (don't lie about watching the news or PBS, you know you do this). However, we live in wonderful times. There are great beers from major manufacturers, and there are great brews from micro breweries. Life is good. Enjoy the variety. There are wine snobs, single-grain whiskey snobs, etc., but true beer drinkers are not snobs. Anyone who tries to be a beer snob is a pretender, and does not really like the stuff. Banish them! Ignore them! Enjoy yourself!

A blogger (video blogger, actually), that I really enjoy reading and viewing, has built a blog to review beers. What is great about this big beer blog is that this is a man who truly enjoys and understands beer. This is not a beer snob. He can enjoy a Bud just as much as a Sam Adams.

He also spend his days suffering through all the corporate bullshit the typical middle class American (who is still lucky? to have a job) does. The blog looks great and the reviews tell you what you need to know.

The blogger I'm talking about is Allyn Hane. Along with the "Big Beer Blog," he also has a blog called "Blogger Illustrated," which focuses on his life as an internet marketer and his journey to independence from the corporate world. I really enjoy his rants about management. He has no qualms talking about what we all feel.

Cubicle Hacks for Health and Wellness

2009-11-21T18:15:00.002-05:00

OK, it's time to get serious about truly surviving your office cubicle. In the past I've been serious, angry, occasionally funny, but maybe not particularly helpful. It had always been my intention to write a great post providing you with the best tips, guidelines and methods for surviving life in your cubicle. Unfortumately. I'm a lazy bastard, and it was never going to happen. Thankfully, someone else had the energy, time and ability to do exactly the post I should have.

A very talented woman, by the name of Adrienne wrote an excellent article called “50 Best Cubicle Hacks for Your Health and Wellness.” As she staes in her post, she found "the 50 best cubicle hacks for your health and wellness. Useful for physical, mental, nutritional, and other aspects of your health." She was not exaggerating.

Topics include:
Best Cubicle Hacks for Your Mental Health and Wellness,
Best Office Supply Cubicle Hacks for Your Mental Health and Wellness,
Best Visual Cubicle Hacks for Your Health and Wellness,
Best Computer Cubicle Hacks for Your Health and Wellness,
Best Cubicle Snack Hacks for Your Health and Wellness,
Best Cubicle Hacks to Keep From Going Postal,
Best Cubicle Tool Hacks for Your Health and Wellness.

Every one of these sections has multiple office cubicle hacks for improving cubicle life, and the links to the sites providing detailed infomation on each. This was either a labor of love or someone has way too much time on their hands.

Please check out this posting. And, while your at it scheck out the rest of her blog. It's called "Radiology Technician Schools." Don't let the name turn you off; all the info is solid.

She also has a posting called "100 Best Web Tools and Tips to Organize Your Inbox" that is just as good as the one described above.

The privacy policy

2009-11-14T17:06:00.000-05:00

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The office cubicle: It's history. What the hell happened?

2009-10-05T20:34:00.000-04:00

Office cubicle history is an unusual subject. Robert Propst, who would become known as the "Father of the Cubicle," would vehemently deny being a parent of the monstrosities we refer to as cubicles today. Robert wanted the "action office," he wanted workers moving around and interacting. He wanted workers doin thir work in different positions: standing, sitting, at the water cooler and in the restrooms. He wanted an office where people moved around and interacted.

Robert Propst's vision was not to cram as many workers into as little space as possible. It was not to reduce movement and interaction. Unfortunately, Robert Propst neglected to take int consideration the fact that most of the people in management are total assholes. It is their goal to dominate, control and subjugate. Less movement, poor air circulation and no view of the outside world are their goals. Poor Mr. Propst saw the good in people. He wanted the offices around the periphery of buildings taken down and spaces opened up. Get real!! The cubicles may have gone up, but those offices stayed in place. Not only were workers surrounded by dull grey or beige walls, but they also had no way of getting to a window and looking out. It was better whe there was one office for the director and maybe an office for a manager, and everyone sat at open desks (watch "How to succeed in business without really trying").

Office cubicles today are like prison cells. Low-walled cubes in enclosed team areas are like cells confining multiple prisoners. High-walled cubes are like solitary confinement. At least when you were at a desk in an open area, your manager was much more relaxed. Also, as a worker at those desks, your manager could not sneak up on you.

I used to think an open are with desks lacked privacy. However, cubicles create paranoid management. If they can't see you, they believe you're not working. If they see you get up to talk to a coworker, you are goofing off. When you hear parts of conversations going on around you, you can't see faces or reactions and you assume the worst.

Is it any wonder office cubicles have gotten such a bad rap over the years. And as for Robert Propst, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions."

Office Desk Accessories: fun cubicle desk accessories

2009-09-28T21:09:00.003-04:00

The fun office cubicle accessories really let you express your individuality. These are the desktop toys, sometimes known as executive desktop toys (i.e., only executives in the company could get away with them). These are the funny posters, the action figures, the aquariums, the strange little terraria (or is it terrariums?). These are the stress toys, the objects that reflect your hobbies; and, if you are not careful, the objects that could get you fired. (Disclaimer: Those looking to advance beyond cubicle life [i.e., an office] should probably avoid these accessories.)

The toys executive-hopefuls might use are the more sedate toys. These are the stress relievers. These include puzzles, the ever popular drinking bird, Newton's Cradle (balls), gyroscopes, Etch-a-sketches, Slinkys, and anything soft and squishy you can squeeze in your hand.. These toys are acceptable to upper management. The purpose they supposedly serve is to relieve your stress and help you relax. If you need this sort of thing on your desk, you must be doing something right. If you're not stressed, you are not working hard enough. They are also conversation starters, and, in some cases, the focus of the rare opportunity for meditation.

Then there are the desk toys and accessories those of us who will never see a real office put on our desks. These are the signs and posters that express what we truly feel (e.g., "SUCCESS - Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings... They did it by killing all those who opposed them" from SJT Enterprises Inc.). These are the USB toys that show how truly warped we are (e.g., dog humping the USB port). These are the voodoo dolls you use on your manager (you know where you want to stick those pins). These are the action figures for your profession (e.g., Freud, Blackbeard or the finance executive action figure). You can get wallpaper for your cubicle walls simulating outdoor vistas to look at during the work day.

For those who long for the outdoors, or miss their plants and pets, there are accessories for them too. There are desk aquaria (aquariums?), all sorts of small desk terraria and plants. There are also the virtual plants and animals available for your screen saver. There are also fake windows with your favorite outdoor scenes to hang on your walls.

Then there are the cubicle desk toys designed for the office warrior. The days of rubber bands to the butt are over. Paper planes over the cubicle wall are done and gone. Not only can you fire your rubber bands with your fingers, there are rubber band derringers, rubber band tommy guns and rubber band machine guns. For the truly high-tech, there are USB missile launchers (with webcams).

Whatever your tastes and level of risk taking, there are desk accessories for you.

See related:
Fun desk accessories: Boss Mug

Office cubicle accessories: Make your cubicle your own.

2009-08-31T20:29:00.021-04:00

Office cubicle accessories are an absolute necessity for remaining sane in your cubicle. At a minimum you are in that cubicle 7.5 to 8 hours a day, 7 days a week. Perhaps you get time off (salaried employee), perhaps not (temp, consultant, etc.). You really need to accessorize that cubicle and make it your own. These accessories range from the mundane and practical to the crazy and weird, but hopefully not the "get you fired kind of crazy and weird."

You need office accessories to organize your work, keep you organized, personalize your cubical space and help you have some fun. Work cubicles, when you first move in, are devoid of personality. It is as if they were designed to break your spirit. The cubicles are usually some version of industrial grey/gray, green, tan or blue. Blank walls, empty desk, empty shelves and a standard Windows desktop theme. Maybe the office or overhead lighting is adequate; maybe not.

One of the great things bout accessories is that they can totally accommodate your taste. They can be any number of colors or materials (wood, plastic, chrome, etc.). They can be conservative or totally outrageous. They can be purely decorative or completely utilitarian.

Practical cubicle accessories help to keep your office space and cubicle in working order. They help you to maintain your sanity. They keep your pens, paper clips, and cables together. The practical cubicle accessories include desk calendars, wall calendars, in boxes, file organizers, desk sets, desk blotters (for those who still use traditional writing instruments), letter trays, cable managers, etc. There is some office tool out there for almost anything you need to do, and for many things you can get along perfectly without doing. Cubicle accessories help to keep your office space and cubicle in order. Keep errant pens, memos, paper clips, and cables together with office cubicle accessories.

However, neither man nor woman lives by the practical alone. The more personal accessories help you stay human. Remember, the office cubicle (cubical?), has as its main purpose to turn you into a piece of office equipment. Don't let it!! This is where pictures, photographs, slogans, plants, themed calendars, holiday decorations and your children's creations come into play. My desk has mini-figures of animated characters I enjoyed, and the wall have my daughter's personalized gifts and creations. It's not corny to put up pictures of spouse and kids. They are the ones for whom you are selling your soul (16 tons and what do you get...). Also, one of the more amazing ideas I've seen on the web is from a company called CubeSkinz. They provide wallpaper for your cubicle that can make you think you are anywhere but in your cubicle. Check out their website.

Then there are the truly strange, the funny, and (hopefully) "just-under-the-wire-and-won't-get-you-fired" accessories. Things like pencil sharpeners shaped like robots, USB plasma balls, dinosaur-shaped lamps, funny takes on motivational posters, personal fans, personal heaters, personal humidifiers, etc.

Remember, they are out to depersonalize you. They want a worker that serves them like a laserjet. Let your cubicle (with your office cubicle accessories) tell them to "stick it" so you don't have to.

Unemployed in a recession - what to do?

2009-03-21T19:19:00.007-04:00

I left a company I was employed with for a dozen years back in June. I knew I wouldn't starve to death. I had taken early retirement and I thought I would be taking on a new career (teaching middle school science). I did the whole transition to teaching thing and was ready for my placement.

I lasted 6 days in front of the "little darlings." This was an inner city middle school. I never gained control of the classroom. After two weeks (6 days in front of students), I resigned rather than have a nervous breakdown.

I was out of work just as the worst economic downturn in 70 years was just hitting its stride. I started looking for a job, and I also started looking for a way to supplement a very meager early-retirement stipend. I explored many make money online (MMO) schemes. Some seemed better than others. One scheme that looked promising was "Site Build It." They offered to hold your hand and walk you through the whole process of creating a site and earning money online. However, I'm the world's greatest procrastinator, and a cheap bastard to boot. I decided to investigate a lot of other options before shelling out any money.

Here is what I believe from my research. "To thine own self be true." If you need the level of hand holding Site Build It offers, go for it. But understand, you are paying $300 per site, and if you are willing to do some homework, you can accomplish the same thing for much less. Several recent on-line reviews of "Site Build It" put things in better perspective than I ever could. One of these, Site Build It Scam Review, asked a number of important questions about this product. If this is such a great product, why are the people using it in such a snit about a negative review. If your site is making money (enough to offset the $300 per your paying), why do you care about a negative review. Unless, of course, the money you are making is from the "Site Build It" affiliate program.

For those, like me, who have been investigating other means of making money online, there are a number of sites that provide quality info for free, and the resources you need cost less than $300 per site. For those really willing to make a go of it, try Court's make money site the "Keyword Academy," or Griz's make money and adsense for beginners sites.

If you need hand holding, and don't have the cash, another possibility is the "Thirty Day Challenge." They tell you how to get started with minimal (or no) investment, and the support, in the way of forums, etc., is impressive.

All I'm saying, is don't shell out a lot of cash without doing your homework.

Surviving your office cubicle, revisited

2009-03-07T16:03:00.004-05:00

I have been very negligent about updating this blog. It is hard to write about office cubicle survival when you are not actually in a cubicle, or even in an office. I was out of work between the middle of September 2008 and mid-January 2009. Happily, I am now gainfully re-employed. Something to really cheer about in this economy.

In my new position, I actually have an office. It is actually not much bigger than my old cubicle, and the air circulation is worse. However, IT IS MINE.

I still appreciate some of the sites that helped me survive cubicle life in the past. I still enjoy Dilbert and Kim at Cube News 1. Of course, if any of the very few readers of this blog have suggestions on surviving cubicle life, they would be greatly appreciated. PLEASE COMMENT.

I will try to be more diligent about posting. Any suggestions for this blog?

When pigs fly!

2008-12-15T17:28:00.004-05:00

This is an expression that I use too much. I was playing around with Squidoo and decided to create a lens about the expression "when pigs fly." I thought it would be fun, and might even help a worthy charity.

Fred Hill's Dream Team

2008-12-03T18:00:00.004-05:00

Is this scary or funny? You tell me!

All of the uniformed services, both military and civil service, march in uniform in parades across the nation. Why shouldn't office workers also do the same? We have our uniforms: the navy blue or black) power suit (never brown), shined black leather shoes (preferably oxfords), the conservative school or rep tie, short, ell-groomed hair, and, of course, the leather briefcase.

Be proud of your office uniform, and get out there and march in those parades.

Great advice for cubicle survival

2008-11-04T15:30:00.003-05:00

NetEffects' tips for surviving in a cubicle world.

Cubicle decoration: Some people have waaaay too much time on their hands.

2008-09-25T14:53:00.004-04:00

I have no idea where these people work. Any place I ever worked, if you decorated your cubicle, or someone else's, in this manner, you could find yourself out on the street.

I will admit, however, I'm impressed by the level of imagination needed to decorate (sabotage?) these cubicles. The uses of mice and post-its are amazing.
Take a look!

I'm baaaaaaaaaack! and What was I thinking?

2008-09-24T18:03:00.003-04:00

OK, I got the whole teacher thing out of my system. With the minimal amount of training I received and a huge pair of blinders that I was wearing that prevented me from seeing even myself, I found I was totally unsuited for teaching in an inner-city middle school. I couldn't handle the disrespect, the violence (not students on me, but students on each other), the outright hostility. I was intellectually prepared for major difficulties but not emotionally or psychologically ready. I lasted 6 days in front of 4 classrooms of 7th and 8th graders (~110 students).

Now, I am 55 and without a plan. What do I want to be if and when I ever grow up?

This particular experiment in my life is now in my file cabinet in a folder labeled "What the hell was I thinking?"

Where were these people 90 days ago?

2008-05-27T19:15:00.003-04:00

I announced 90 days ago that I was taking early retirement and I was going into teaching. The senior director, someone I've known for twelve years, now takes an interest in what I'm doing. It is only eight days before I leave. I have had more communications with this person in the last two days than I've had with her in the last 4 years. She wants to be brought up to speed on everything I've worked on. I'm at a point where I just want to say "bite me," but I don't want to get my ass fired in my last eight days.

Aarrrh!!!!

2008-04-24T22:33:00.002-04:00

I like the music.

Gleamin' the cube!

2008-04-13T16:26:00.001-04:00

What the wheels on your chair are really for!