Sushi, like the food

Oh, hi.

2011-01-19T07:16:00.001-08:00

This thing is too much pressure. I'm so bad at it. Watch me be bad at it here instead

"when i'm good, i'm very good. but when i'm bad, i'm better."

2010-07-21T09:05:00.000-07:00

For a multitude of reasons, not the least of which are:

1) She made Cary Grant look less than suave and completely confident (Fine, it was before he was super famous, it still counts damnit)

2) She always looked like a chandelier.

3) She always talked like a loan shark.

4) She pretty much wrote all her material - for a woman in the film industry in 1933 (hell, NOW) that's pretty fucking badass.

5) Why am I making this list? She's Mae friggin' West, it's self-explanatory.

And just because I am easily amused...by myself. I know, unfortunate, but it's going to come in handy when they put me in that padded room:

Me: on a sort of unrelated note

i've decided i'm going to be mae west when i grow up

Theresa: i support this

except

she was white

i think

being a citizen doesnt make that okay, sushi

Me: listen

i will be your dirty brown mae west and you will LIKE it

goddamnit

Theresa: oooh baby

that just gave me shivers

Me: damn straight

now fetch me my slippers

oh rats, wrong movie. i just turned into rex harrison instead

way to ruin the one good vampire movie

2010-07-21T08:21:00.000-07:00

So there's this movie, right? No, not that one. This one:

And it is perfect. And beautiful. And terrifying. And just all around a really fucking great movie.

It also happens to be Swedish, so there are subtitles involved. No big, right?

Oh, but wait. Then there's this:

Um, someone please explain to me what the fuck that's supposed to be because those do not look like the same movie to me. That looks like a Twilight movie for the pre-school crowd. Only with better acting.

All because some people are too lazy to you know, read. Words are hard, I get it, but this is just unnecessary, you Hollywood bums.

P.S. - I did not embed the second video at a smaller size because I think the trailer/movie is inferior (but it so is) - I'm just technologically incompetent.

an open letter to the second act of any script ever

2010-07-16T13:01:00.000-07:00

Dear Act II,
You suck. Possibly you suck worse than the dentist. Okay, that's not true, even you're not that bad. But the fact remains--you are the bane of my very existence.

I have a first act. I have a third act. What do you mean, telling me I need to have something linking the two together where the plot actually unfolds? Ludicrous.

And even when I have you mapped out in my head, you're still a tricky little fucker. Playing mind games with me as to where my scenes should actually go, confusing me as to how I'm going to fit everything in a manner that is cohesive and not total shit.

Second act, you're the goddamn devil.

But please be nice to me and cooperate so that I can some day hope to not live in a shoebox outside a Starbucks with a sign that says 'will write for coffee. or a cracker.'

Love always and never,
Sushi

rainbows and things

2010-07-07T13:07:00.000-07:00

Remember how I mentioned I'm consistently distracted by shiny things?

Well. That's what you get for reading things coming from a girl who has the attention span of a gnat.

I digress. I have some legitimate excuses, some lazy ones. Moving, work, writing (I swear!), and watching all the movies I can possibly get my hands on while my netflix account still loves me.

Planning several trips, in and out of the country. More on that later. It's all very hush-hush, you know. It's a wonder I don't work for the government, ain't it?

Well. I'll write when I have something interesting to say. Clearly not now. Right now there are many things on the internet way more interesting. Such as:

I finally identify with that "I'll have what she's having" line in When Harry Met Sally. Also, I wish this dude was my friend. My secret friend, cause it's likely he might scare people in public. Or himself. Either way.

Top 5 non-human things I miss about Monroe, Michigan

2010-03-30T09:44:00.000-07:00

In no particular order:

1. The creek. Specifically, being a nine year old and walking from my house to the field behind my subdivision that led to the creek so that we could catch frogs.

2. Tim Horton's French Vanilla Iced Cappucino. Better than Starbucks, better than Dunkin Donuts, better than any iced coffee drink I've ever had. Two points to the Canadians.

3. Frenchtown Mall - now the "Mall of Monroe" - where fourteen year old girls walk around attempting to look way cooler and far less awkward than they actually are and succeed in looking even more like awkward, awkward teenagers. I used to be one of those girls. I also used to work at Olga's Kitchen in the mall. That I don't miss so much.

4. The fact that on any given Saturday night, you will run into at least five people you grew up with/went to school with/generally haven't seen in a decade or more. And their conversations with you almost always start with "I had a baby! Don't know where that loser daddy a his ran off to, though..."

5. Monroe High School will always, no matter how it tries, look like a state prison.

I can't make this shit up, people.

riddle me this

2010-03-16T10:44:00.000-07:00

Why is it that people in movies always seem to fall in love within absurd time frames? It's always two days, or a weekend, or hours, depending on what you're watching.

Note to Hollywood - just cause your characters have been humping like bunnies for a few minutes does not mean they're in love.

I was watching Guess Who's Coming To Dinner and I don't have any real comment on its political message - it was liberal as fuckall for its time and it had good intentions, but watching it now with some of the obviously outdated terminology makes me wince through parts of it.

Whatever. The point is, these bitches have been together all of ten days and then spring their parents with the news that they're getting married. Fuck, if I was Spencer Tracy I'd be pissed too.

So says the cynic in me, anyway.

But when Tracy gives his big speech at the end (and if you've never seen it I'm probably spoiling the best part - not counting the half a second you get to see Sidney Poitier shirtless of course) I bawl my bloody eyes out. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that he died seventeen days after they wrapped filming, or the fact that he was so sick they used two shooting scripts, one with him and one without.

Mostly it's that when he looks at Katharine Hepburn and says "The only thing that matters is what they feel, and how much they feel, for each other. And if it's half of what we felt- that's everything." And in that moment, when her eyes are completely welled up with tears, she's either the greatest actress in the world or she's not acting at all.

It's also the most clever way to sell the ludicrous notion that two kids who spent ten days in Hawaii are actually in love. By implying that twenty five years later they could maybe, if they're really lucky, turn into Tracy and Hepburn.

And if that doesn't make you cry, please continue on with your life of puppy kicking and soul killing.

i suck at this part 2.

2010-03-12T09:32:00.000-08:00

Well it's a little late to talk about Salinger now, isn't it? Procrastination wins yet again. Suffice it to say he's dead and I was sad and I spent a good portion of my formative years falling in love with Holden Caulfield every time I read Catcher in the Rye. But Franny and Zooey is still my favorite and I've spent my few adult years (obviously using the term adult in the loosest fashion possible) being in love with Zooey. So, whatever this says about me as a person, I don't know, but Salinger was one of the reasons I wanted to write when I was a kid and ten year old me, sixteen year old me and twenty-three on the cusp of twenty-four me is still recovering.

Speaking of writing - this is a terrible segue I know - I signed up for Script Frenzy, which as I understand it is the script equivalent to NaNoWriMo. It starts April 1st, so I guess I should probably finish that fucking outline, huh? Right.

Here's the thing. I detest outlining. Like, I'd rather be stuck on a desert island with Sarah Palin than outline. At least she'd have a shotgun. So I started outlining this script and then I stopped about halfway through, because it seemed like self-imposed torture. Unfortunately the idea itself is convoluted enough that it requires writing down, so, goddamnit about sums up my thoughts.

Oddly enough I do pretty well with lists (never said my logic was anything other than ass backwards) so, I'm making a list of shit I need to get done this weekend and the outline is going on the list. Only way it's gonna get done. I won't put the list here cause honestly I don't think anyone cares that I haven't done laundry in three weeks. If they do, bigger issues at hand.

So I will, in theory be babbling incoherently here more often. We'll see. I might just get distracted by something really shiny instead.

I am oh so bad at this game...

2010-02-02T22:49:00.000-08:00

long and unnecessary rambling about j.d. salinger, holden caulfield, and zooey coming soon.

consider yourself warned.

in which resa and i are bored at work

2009-12-23T08:48:00.000-08:00

me: hey shawty

it's yuh birthday

Theresa: we gonna party like its my birthday?

me: gonna sip bacardi like it's your birthday

Theresa: oh

those are the words?

me: no you had yours right

that's the line that follows

i think

me: oh here we are

Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go shawty
It's your birthday
We gon' party like it's yo birthday
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birthday
And you know we don't give a fuck
It's not your birthday!

Theresa: i know that song!

me: glad we figured that out. i don't know what i would have done with my life otherwise

it's FIDDY!

Theresa: MISTER FIDDY!

me: yup, it is most definitely the wednesday before break

2009

2009-12-23T07:47:00.000-08:00

In 2009 I:

Went to Lollapalooza for the second time (again with Jess, even though we now only get to see each other about once a year), went to Vegas for the first time, saw Justin Timberlake minus Nsync in concert for the first time, wrote a lot but finished little, stayed in the same apartment, got two lovely new roommates, celebrated my birthday twice in the span of a week, became an aunt, actually went OUT in Atlanta while visiting the 'rents for the first time, re-read Other Voices, Other Rooms, made fantastic use of my Netflix account, became addicted to SVU, got in the habit of taking vitamins and drinking tea, went to Florida for the first time (tomorrow!)

In 2009 I did not:

Quit smoking, finish a screenplay, sleep enough, see enough of my favorite people, buy a single pair of shoes (PROGRESS FUCKERS), save near enough money (or maybe not), make enough use of my guitar, travel outside the country.

Resolutions: Save money for Scotland, finish the romantic comedy script by April, sleep more and get sick less

Charade: Part One

2009-12-22T15:53:00.000-08:00

And the opening scene for "Charade" cause it's my absolute favorite. I wish I'd written it. Excuse the crappy youtube quality. You can watch the whole thing on Hulu if you feel so inclined. Which you should.

the 40s did it better

2009-12-22T15:44:00.000-08:00

After much careful deliberation (read: upon making some wise-ass remark that prompted Larke to ask what movie it was from only to find I made it up) I've decided (read: Larke said I should and I agreed) that I'm going to write a 40s style romantic comedy.

You know, the kind where both people are charming. After watching about 15 or so romantic comedies and outlining all of them, some of them great (Say Anything is a classic) some of them so bad I'm still not sure what the fuck they were intended to be (looking at you, Elizabethtown) I've come to the conclusion that according to modern-day romantic comedy rules, only one lead is allowed to be funny and charming. The other fulfills the uptight asshole who just needs to let loose role. And the charming one is generally free-spirited to the point of irresponsible.

I miss the days when romantic comedies had two leads who were both incredibly charming and fun and maybe irresponsible in doses, but as a whole fully-formed adults. They could keep up with each other without resorting to cheap slapstick jokes or degradation on someone's part. Plus, quick, fast-paced dialogue is my favorite kind to write and who was better at that than Cary Grant, Katharine or Audrey Hepburn, Rosalind Russell and basically everything Billy Wilder ever wrote even when it wasn't a romantic comedy?

So that's what I'm gonna do. A modern day 40s style romantic comedy. Now I just need to come up with a plot.

In the meantime, a few clips from one of my favorites:

New year, less procrastination...well, that's the idea anyway.

2009-12-17T13:27:00.000-08:00

Because in 2010 I plan to be productive or something. So, a few less whistling puppies and more writing-centric posts.

...

Oh who am I kidding? There will be puppies. There'll just be more writing, too.