Sweet Grieve

My Little Brother Now

2011-09-13T00:15:00.000-07:00

This is how my little brother looks now after almost 7 months of going in and out of the hospital.

He lost lots of pounds and his hair are one by one falling apart..

We transferred him in one of the government hospital here in Philippines. My mama said, he is charge free on his stay on the hospital, doctors fee, and some medicines that are available. However, if there were no medicines available, my parents has to buy it outside drugstores. And if there's no money, my brother just took the pain by himself.

It happened most of the time because there were so many cancer children on the hospital. Some make beds outside the door. And the government has to be fair in each of them. I assumed the government funds are not enough to provide the expensive medicines each patients need.

Many says, almost everyday one cancer patient dies.. and almost everyday another new patient comes.

Nobody wants to get sick or have his loved ones on that situation. It breaks our hearts but we do not hold what tomorrow brings. A prayer for giving my little brother a normal life... a healthy life and then laugh and sing with us....... seems impossible.

Still we want to do and give what ever we can.

My faith faints slowly. Yet somehow I know, better things will come. I just now pray, that whatever happens, we may all dedicate to God lightly.

Please Pray for my little brother

2011-02-22T19:27:00.000-08:00

Bogz is my 6-year old brother. He has an Acute lymphoblastic leukemia (ALL) which was discovered last February 7,2011. He has also suffered hypertension while he underwent his first chemotherapy.

Last February 10, 2011 while in ward room of the hospital, he was rushed to Intensive Care Unit (ICU) due to hypertension. We presumed that his body reacted while injecting new blood on his streams and with the medicines for chemotherapy intake. He cried and cried saying his chest is painful and his head seems to explode. We could not understand his pain and the nurse will not give a medicine that would lower blood pressure because it’s still less 24 hours from previous intake and not prescribed by the doctor.

He vomited, pee, and waste. So that was then he was transferred to ICU.

He cried to papa saying “Papa, I am so tired. I want to go”. Papa said to him, “My son, if you are tired, just close your eyes and sleep because Jesus will go with you”. He gently closed his eyes and sleep. He snore and he would not response to our voices.

They say these were usually the signs of coming death. Then papa read the Psalm 23. In a moment we know God will take him and I know my papa is ready for it.

I did not know what to say how a child understands life and death. Outside the ICU room, we just cried. The doctor asked us if we agree to install the child a “life-saver” machine as they say and as standard operating procedure of the hospital. Papa felt so helpless because of the pain the child felt. If God will take him, please let the sufferings end. But we decide to give a try.

Inside the ICU, I saw my little brother with so many tubes inserted and electronic equipments around him. After an hour of waiting, Papa said that the vital signs of my brother has stabled. That then we prayed.we just cried.

By the next day, we have to transfer bogz to a government hospital. We don’t know where to get money to pay the bills. Mama went to many foundations to seek financial assistance and blood banks for platelets needed. However, financial lend was not enough.

We see my little brother is fighting to live. I do not know what the purpose of giving another life to him. All I know that time “Miracle truly works thru prayers”

Now, the tube in his mouth that provides oxygen was removed. He can lightly talk. But his platelets are decreasing every day. He is schedule for a CT scan to check if there were veins damaged during the hypertension attacked.

We pray that there is none single vein damage and his leukemia will be cured. I know God give this test to us, so I know He will touch my little brother. Soon he can run, jump, and laugh with us.

I see God works on my family especially on my little brother. It is with the power of prayers that God will hear and answer. It is on prayer that miracle moves. For we know that nothing is impossible with God.

Please my family need your prayers. Please pray for the total healing of my brother and let him live the life the way we enjoy. And that we can financially overcome all the medicines for his medications and chemotherapy.

Thank you so much and God bless us all.

For My Little Brother

2011-02-15T02:39:00.000-08:00

Hold on my little brother..

Wait till I come home..

I still wanna see you

and I wanna say how sorry I am

I pray that God will give me a chance

A chance to relieve you from the pain

A life full of acceptance and forgiveness

Please my Lord, not now.

Let it not be too late for my heart to cry.

Give me a day to stress out the pain

and let it bury with joy.

"My brother", i love you

The Most

2011-02-14T17:18:00.000-08:00

The most beutiful thing is so hard to see...

The most wonderful feeling is hard to touch...

The most awesome wonder is so hard to think...

And the one you love most, is beyond your reach.