The Tacky Museum

HOLY TOAST!

2018-09-30T22:46:00.001-05:00

Well, we found it. The perfect way to cause a world wide religious event. They will come from all over the world to see this. Stamp this into your bread just before dropping in the toaster and serve it up and watch the miracle unfold.

Enjoy!

Birthday Gift

2018-08-19T10:37:00.001-05:00

Well, I know what your thinking. This looks like an ordinary coin bank. In fact, we find it quite delightful. That's the problem. I got this (actually this is not the exact item. I found it in a thrift shop) for my 7th grade birthday from my best friend. He was so excited to give it to me. I felt bad and played along like I was excited for the gift. There were a half dozen other kids there that had given me cool / normal toys for a 7 year old. I put it on a shelf, forgot about it and played with other toys that day. Until now, I found it again in a thrift store. So on this particular piece, I strongly believe my attitude and actions were simply...........TACKY.

Solved Mystery

2018-08-16T21:33:00.001-05:00

Solved Mystery. Dinosaur extension. Yes we found out. We uncovered this teenage T-Rex close to Glen Rose Texas. Turns out they were driven into extension by cigarettes. They were all chain smokers!

Bling Bling

2018-05-06T17:05:00.002-05:00

Got these beautiful pieces on a recent trip to New York City. China Town is the best if you are looking for high fashion jewelry. After some serious negotiations, and by offering up a volume purchase scenario, we were able to pick these up on the cheap, and I mean cheap.

Enjoy!

Classic Whoopie Cushion

2018-02-18T08:15:00.000-06:00

My all time favorite practical joke. And who says we don't have a sense of humor? Here is a great gift idea for you. Put one of these in a birthday card and write in "Hey..... you really are a GAS!" Enjoy!

Pink Flamingo Air Freshener

2018-02-18T08:12:00.002-06:00

Brought to you again by those creatively innovated people who make the little tree air fresheners. We love these little guys..................

Large Mouth Bass Air Freshner

2018-02-13T06:19:00.002-06:00

Brought to you by the creative folks that make the tree air freshers. What could say I'm a Bubba more clearly than a large mouth bass hanging from your rear view mirror. How creative! I can see and hear Jimmy Houston now wearing his old folks wrap around shades and goofy laugh saying - Wow I have one just like this in my truck! The fresher wore out but the fish is still standing tall and proud. I just throw a couple of Vanillarama's under the seat and we are Good to Go!

First Couple Shot Glass

2018-02-11T12:20:00.000-06:00

Well, does it get any better than this. Imagine taking a few shots with the former first couple.......... Well, Yes We Did! TM.com Disclaimer - We are not taking a political position with this post. Just trying to point out - OMG is there not anything sacred anymore. A shot glass with the first couple. I love this great country of ours!

Busy Little Beaver - A realistic charmer!

2018-02-11T12:13:00.002-06:00

Leave it to Beaver. This little guy is one of my favorite shelf top items. We brought him down to proudly feature him this month. He has a couple of nicks here and there, but nothing to hinder the long term value of this piece. (Notice price tag still on ridge. This adds value on resale. Not that we would consider parting with this little guy)

Elton John - Screaming Outfit and Sunglasses

2018-02-11T12:08:00.003-06:00

What can I say.

Most people like his music. We like his taste in clothes and fashion. We think this style came in and out, about as fast as the 8 Track Player. Enjoy!

No Tear Toilet Paper

2018-02-11T12:05:00.002-06:00

Fun Yet Practical Joke - One for the whole family

You ask, and we deliver. No shortage of potty humor around the office here. This classic is one of my personal favorites. There is no way to tear off any toilet paper from this role. Its solid, much like the museum staff. We constantly bring you the widest selection of Tacky from around the globe. Please remember this, if you don't take anything away from this website - The job isn't finished until the paperwork is done!

Christmas Story Leg Lamp - It's ''Fragile''!

2017-11-26T08:07:00.000-06:00

What says Christmas more than a genuine leg lamp direct from the house in Ohio where the movie was shot. What I like most about this particular artifact is its multi-position functionality. It can be off. The top light can be on. Both the top light and the leg can be on, and you can have just the leg on. We have found the top light on position is great for reading, while the leg on feature provides great mood lighting. The leg lamp is also very portable, by simply unplugging and moving to your favorite front window to display for all of the neighbors to enjoy..............like at my house. This is one of the few pieces that we actually keep in our home, outside of the museum itself. (Yes, we have special insurance) This item has one small defect, otherwise it would be perfect. The cat decided to play with the fishnet hose, and a small section is torn just around the ankle. (Not illustrated in the website photos, but can be seen if you visit the museum) We have found through the years its almost impossible to prevent damage to rare articles of excellence. Enjoy...............We still say Merry Christmas here at The Tacky Museum. So, Merry Christmas!

John Wayne Toilet Tissue

2017-11-05T22:11:00.002-06:00

It's from the DUKE himself. (Duke?) It's the real deal. Reminds me of the ole saying...........The job isn't finished until the paperwork is done! One of my concerns about toilet paper in general is this - Is it really recycled? We here at the Tacky Museum think that is a bit extreme this whole notion of recycling toilet paper. So we want to go on record to that effect. Well back to this fabulous subject we are enjoying - This here is genuine John Wayne Toilet Tissue. It's Rough, it's Tough and it Doesn't Take Crap Off Anybody! In case you are curious what brand we use here at the museum..........well Charmin of course. Don't squeeze the Charmin!

Genuine Flamingo Hilton Ash Tray!

2017-11-05T21:58:00.002-06:00

Can you even image the excitement this ash tray has seen in its years of service? This is a genuine hard plastic black ash tray from the Flamingo Hilton casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. It was probably used by one of the members of the Rat Pack, or perhaps all of them. Also, the nerve of whoever took this from the hotel! The security guards are still talking about this caper. I'm pretty sure the statute of limitations has expired, so I'm comfortable sharing this rare treasure with you, without any real risk or repercussions. Please note the price tag in the center of the ash tray. The glare faded it out somewhat. It's true to its vintage and has a slight purple pinkish hew. The price is not visible; however our appraisers estimate that it would have traded for somewhere between $10 and $15 thousand dollars.

Totally Realistic Ceramic Alligator

2017-10-15T22:18:00.001-05:00

Can you believe the creativity and true artistry exhibited with this piece? What says a Cajun Ayeee louder than a ceramic alligator. Our expert staff believes this was originally used to hold pens and pencils, or perhaps a tooth brush (assuming the previous owner had teeth). So sorry we did not get a close up shot of this particular aspect on this item................YES it still has part of the original price tag on the back! Get out of here you say. Double down situation with this item. It also has the second hand shop price tag on the bottom. What's your best guess on what we paid for this piece and what its worth? We are so so happy to have it in our collection. So much so, we took this shot on top of our metal high security official Tacky Museum documents and artifacts briefcase, with a file folder in the background so as to display this in a more natural office setting. ENJOY!!!!!

Wooden Hands

2017-10-15T21:56:00.003-05:00

Check out the realistic detailing of this particular piece. You ask - Well, where did you get such a high quality piece? Perhaps I should not say, but I will. Got this at the Salvation Army Thrift store on Inwood Road, Dallas. It's next to the original Sonny Bryan BBQ. We enjoy placing various objects in the hands. Estimated value on this piece could well be in the high thousands, perhaps millions. Its currently out for appraisal. (There is a wooden hand expert we are consulting with. Hope to have a better idea of its true value in 5-8 weeks. Stay glued to this site for more updates)

Awesome Tiki Man - Natural Wood Carving - Closely Resembles Real Simulated Wood

2011-08-14T22:53:00.000-05:00

Check this out. Oh my. This used to be in somebody's house somewhere. Sticker on back says made in Indonesia. The upper photo shows this awesome guy in a stately pose on top of his throne. The lower photo shows he is approachable. This is one of our favorite pieces in the Home Furnishings Wing. Enjoy.

Lava Lamps

2011-08-07T22:40:00.000-05:00

Classic Americana at its finest. Here are two Lava Lamps in our vast collection. One works pretty good, except it was burning a hole in the table. Perhaps the bulb is too big. We will have to keep an eye on this one. Check out the detail shot of this blue gem above. It's simply magnificent. I could stare at this one all day. The other one is made out of cheap plastic. Some say it's the better of the two. We do get a lot of positive feedback about the orange glow at the base. Does any body know what that goo is inside?

Chia Head - Bill Clinton

2011-07-30T08:56:00.000-05:00

Who has time for this stuff? Another gift. Probably Christmas. One of my relatives feeling guilty unable to find the perfect gift picked this up on the clearance table. "Oh, he'll love this" they said as they scampered out of the store........... This Bill Clinton look alike caught their eye and won me over. It's all we can do here at the museum to preserve the integrity of the unopened container. Clearly it will loose significant value if we make the magic happen.

Here are some interesting tidbits on on the box:

Handmade Decorative Planter
Easy To Do........Fun to Grow!
The Chia Head is handmade by artisans using techniques passed down from the Indians of ancient Mexico. Each head is sculptured from rich terra-cotta clay that is kiln fired.
FULL COAT 1-2 WEEKS
EASY TO GROW - HERE'S HOW:
A. Soak clay head in water overnight
B. Spread water-soaked chia seeds on head. Fill water hole.
C. Keep full of water. Moist seeds should sprout in 3-5 days.
D. Grows quickly to full coat.
Reuse your Chia Head indefinitely. Simply replant with chia (extra seed included) or similar herb seeds, such as basil, timothy, marjoram or thyme.

Suggestions & tidbits curiously missing from the box:
Can raise money faster than Washington can print $100 bills
Can talk out of both sides of its mouth
Likes Cigars, Interns and White Water
Rambles something to the effect of....... "Thanks Ross Perot" "Thanks Ross Perot"

Click here to buy a Chia Head!

Turkey Foot - Professionally Mounted

2011-07-30T08:34:00.000-05:00

My Mother in law gave me this for my birthday. It's one of my older pieces. Based on its gesture, I think she was trying to tell me something. What do you think?

Here is the inscription on the back: "This is what happens to all those turkey feet. Did you ever wonder what happened to the feet from all those turkeys we eat? I ran across a taxidermist (with a sense of humor) who decided to put 'em to good use. This is a preserved turkey foot mounted on a 4x6" panel. Hang one up for those "special visitors""

Frogs Playing Dominoes

2011-07-15T07:47:00.000-05:00

What could be more fun than drinking a cold one and playing dominoes you ask? Watching two frogs...........
Enjoy!!!!!!!

Pink Flamingos (''A Flock'') in Natural Urban Setting

2011-07-02T11:18:00.000-05:00

What could be more natural than a flock of beautiful pink flamingos congregating around two bowling balls? This exhibit has created a great deal of controversy among the staff. As your Curator of The Tacky Museum, I don't believe these are tacky and worthy of entry. However, under extreme pressure of loosing my volunteer position, Senior Management required me to display these fine birds in all of their glory. ;o(

The King of Pop Catrina Doll

2011-07-02T10:40:00.000-05:00

Wow - Check out this rare find. From "The King of Rock and Roll" posted in June 2011 to "THE KING OF POP"!!!! All in one visit. We uncovered this treasure in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico right after his untimely death. Yeah Yeah....... we know....... we know. We know we previously represented that we are into Classic Americana. Since this is........"THE KING OF POP", we thought an international import / addition to the Tacky Museum would work well with our other pieces. Enjoy...........and remember.........No touching!

The King on Velvet in Hand Carved Wooden Frame

2011-06-02T22:04:00.000-05:00

My first piece. Yes..........It's....... "THE KING OF ROCK AND ROLL"!!!! This wonderful acquisition started my quest for Classic Americana artifacts. Take note of the extraordinary detailing on the wood frame. It's simply exquisite.