Im prepared though

I have my wall chart

I have my gloryhunting Brazil Shirt

I have my Four Four Two World Cup edition ready to steal stats from

I have my Vuvuzela

I have my referee card sets for overexcited carding of players while watching matches

I have my Fifa World Cup game ready to play the matches after watching them

I have my desktop set ready

For the desktop background Im using click here

I have the fever.

Ive got World Cup Fever.

….And so does Chopsy

He even demanded a go on the Vuvuzela

And got stuck….

WORLD CUP BABY

“I’d love to work with Capello, but I’d say no. I read an interview with Alessandro Nesta who’s been asked to come back for Italy and he said he couldnt because he’d be taking someones spot who’d helped get them there. I feel the same. You can’t just walk in when others have put the graft in”

Jamie Carragher, FourFourTwo Magazine, April 2010.
May 2010, Jamie Carragher named in Englands 30 man preliminary World Cup Squad.

What a cunt

Whatsapp
Price – 59p
You can use this to send free text messages, even internationally if the other person also has Whats App. This application is also available for blackberry users, so you can also send texts to friends who buy it on that. For iPhone to iPhone messages you can also send pictures and videos for free to other users. I mainly use this to text a couple of international friends, as I have enough texts a month to send to Uk mates.

Around Me
Price – Free
Helps you find places around you such as bars, resteraunts, petrol stations etc. Gives you a list, and if you turn your phone sideways you can see it virtually using the camera. Pretty cool visually, as it uses GPS to find your location and the places around you and then gives you it in a visual form. Click the link to see some examples of this

Tesco Clubcard
Price – Free
Put in your name and your Tesco clubcard number. BOOM. Now when you shop you just open the app and they scan your phone rather than your card. Means you dont forget your clubcard. Some shops dont have scanners that can scan this and then you look like a twat, but who cares you have a mother fucking iPhone bitches.

Tweetdeck
Price – Free
A twitter interface. Is awesome if you use twitter. Of the apps Ive tried, I have to say this is the best twitter application

AA Route planner
Price- £1.79
A route planner, and it will also track you using GPS as you go on the route. Is like a much cheaper version of a tom tom, without the speaking bits. If you have someone with you when your driving its great, but if you want directions read out to you by the phone you’d need to spend £80ish on the Tom Tom app. Personally I cant justify that at the moment, and this app is a great alternative.

TuneIn Radio
Price – £1.19
Internet radio, needs a 3g or wifi signal to use obviously. Picks up a variety of channels, and you can also record.

Rooms
Price – £1.19
The best iPhone IRC application Ive found. Uses colours to distinguish between users. I tried a few free apps but this was by far the best.

Of the rest, iPint is funny the first time you use it and is a good way to show the iphone to old people who dont get it as you hilariously pretend to drink a pint (you so wacky). Lego Photos is quite a neat free ap, that turns your photo into a lego picture, I use the trainline ap for train times, bump lets you swap photos and contacts between iphones by just pumping them together,

GAMES

Yeah the important bit, for when you’re sat on the toilet.

Angry Birds
Price- 59p
You sling birds using a catapult to try and knock down walls of buildings holding pigs. It sounds rubbish but its amazingly fun and can be played as short bursts.

Labyrinth 2
Price – £2.99
One of those ball in the hole games. I really like this, and theres create your own and download for levels, so I guess you’ll never properly beat it, as you can always download things to extend it. I got this for free, but I think its worth the price.

Words With Friends
Price – theres a free or a £1.99 paid version
I dont think it matters which you get – the paid version may slightly better track your stats better. Scrabble for the cool kids. Play online against other people

Doodle Jump
Price – 59p
Simple platforming jumping. Is fun as hell. You tilt the phone to make your guy jump between various platforms to get as high as you can. Really addictive fun, and good to play as a two minute game.

You vs The Wall
Price – free
Is hole in the wall on your iphone, suprisingly fun to be honest. Its wacky as hell

Sporcle
Price – £1.19
This is one of those lists games. Basically gives you a subject and you have to get as many answers on that subject. For instance, “Stars of Friends” or “Teams to have played in the Premiership”. Really can be fun.

I’ve got games I paid more money for, like Fifa 10, Tiger Woods 10 and CM10 but I almost never play them, the above are much more quick play games

It was awesome.

We turned up semi late, and were worried we would have missed getting in there, but luckily there was a queue so no one had gone in yet. Theyd even set up a red carpet and there were a load of press photographers there. Exciting!

We were a little far back, and I saw some people getting photographed and sent Rach to look, but she didnt recognise anyone. The queue started to move slowly, as I started to get worried that they over allocated tickets and we wouldnt get in. It slowed down, and slower and slower, till there were just 8 people between us and the front. And the line had stopped

For 10 minutes we stood there, while they checked how much space was there. A few people walk up with names on the guest list as we stood there impatiently. Then they let in 2 people. Then another 4. Then the two in front of us.

Then us.

Then they stop the person behind us and say “Sorry, we’re full”

KICK ASS!

We got in and theres free popcorn on the seats. Double kick ass! They tell us to turn off our phones as theres going to be a special interview before the film, and any recording equipment or phones have to be off or they’ll interfere with the mics. Then they introduce two of the stars to do a quick Q+A session. The dude who plays Kick Ass (Aaron Johnson) and mother fucking McLovin (Christopher Mintz-Plasse).

This fucking rules.

McLovin is on top form, while other dude is a bit of a mumbler, almost Beckham esque with the amount of “you knows” and “umms” he drops into a sentance. They’re asked if Brad Pitt was on set much to which McLovin replies “Pitt doesnt give a fuck about us”. After a few more dumb questions and hints at a sequel they go off to eat having “seen the movie enough allready”

The movie fucking ruled, and I can see this being a great little series. And hopefully I can go to more previews in the future!

It Kicks Fucking Ass.

Super hero films have become a little too serious in recent years. The Batman series has made heroes moodier, darker, more mysterious. Less fun. Kick Ass is a film that puts the fun back into super hero films. Its what Spiderman could have been if Quentin Tarrantino got his hands on it.

One of the big worries about a super hero film is that you’re going to get bogged down in a long background setup story, but the story of how young comic book fan Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) becomes Kick Ass is pretty simple – its not about revenge, its not about dead parents, its about a kid who wants to be a hero.

“Fuck it. Im getting the Bazooka.”

Johnson is fine as Kick Ass, though does seem to be constantly doing his best Tobey McGuire as Peter Parker voice. He’s not the only one who seems to be doing an impression, as Nick Cage in the role that he as a comic book fan himself has been waiting for, does his best Adam West impression complete with short sentences… with pauses… in random places.

Cage plays Big Daddy, a hero who operates in the underworld and holds more than a passing resemblance to Batman. He’s after revenge on the man who ruined his life, with the backstory of this being shown in a neat 3D comic book sequence. Big Daddy is ably assisted by his daughter, Hit Girl

Hit Girl is the star of the film. You may be walking in to see Kick Ass, but you’ll be walking in talking about the performance of 11 year old Chloe Moretz. She’s a miniature ass kicking machine who racks up the biggest kill count in the film (including a great part thats shot almost first person shooter style) while swearing like a trucker.

Kick Ass – “How do I get a hold of you”

Hit Girl – “You just contact the mayor, he has a special signal he shines into the sky in the shape of a giant cock”

Hit Girl is amazing and Im shocked that the Daily Mail haven’t had a field day with her antics yet. Her relationship with Big Daddy is genuinely moving, and Moretz plays the role superbly. She’s like a miniature version of Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, though in a fight my money would be on Hit Girl.

Also popping up is McLovin himself, Christopher Mintz-Plass is again on good form as the nerd son of the crime boss, who gets to live out his fantasy and become a super “hero” himself. I don’t think Mintz-Plass will ever get away from McLovin, but this role is one that could become just as iconic over a film series, if it seems thats inevitable for such a strong first film.

Theres a love story that runs parallel to the main story that isn’t as strong as the rest of the film, but still provides a fair amount of laughs as the geek tries to get the girl. Even though she thinks hes gay.

Hit Girl – “Okay you cunts… lets see what you can do”

A great cast, a breakout performance from Moretz, and a number of moments that made me give tiny fistpumps in my seat. Kick Ass is the action film of 2010, and is a must see for anyone, comic book nerd or not.

5 Star Classic!

At Christmas I decided that the time was right to start running again. I do this every few months, get myself motivated and ready, and planned it out.

And then dont bother.

Early January I looked up the Couch to 5k guide. Its been reccomended me by a few people, but I’d always been put off by how overly simple it seems. I mean, Im a guy who used to be a champion triathlete.

(over a decade and a lot less inches on the waist ago now)

So I decided to stop being such a dick and printed it out. Then unhappy with the way it looked I resized it, reprinted it in colour, and printed it again. Then I still wasnt happy, so I redid it, putting in which days of the week I’d do the training, making sure the columns were all the right size.

Anything to stop actually training.

By the time I was happy with it, and had it printed out, it started to snow. So I couldnt train again. YES!!!

By the time it stopped snowing, I wasnt in the mood. Then 2 weeks ago we were in the Nike Outlet store, and I bought me and Rach new running trainers for less than£50 total. So now, we had to start running.

Fast forward to this morning tho, and we still hadnt started. I woke up at around 11 and thought fuck it. Time to run.

So I consulted the plan online (my printouts gone walk about) and the idea was

“Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.”

Piece of piss eh?

So we start walking to a park round the corner. Easy so far. Get in the park and start running, and immediately hit a hill. Oh well only 60 seconds, easy. We did circuits of the park, and after only our third running 60 seconds I was panting more than Tiger Woods in bed with a porn star.

When we hit the 15 minute mark I started to get confused, were we meant to do 20 minutes total including the warm up, or 20minutes plus the warm up.  The easy thing would have been to say the first option, but we said balls to that, and did a full 20 minutes of the run walk cycle, then an extra one for luck, then walked the five minutes home.

So I have to carry this on for 2 more times this week, for 9 weeks total.

How long before I quit?

Ive just finshed a book that I picked up on recommendation from a friend, who didn’t say anything major about it. Just a simple “this books pretty good”. Although the guy cant always be trusted (he recommended I buy the worst Xbox game Ive ever played once and even thinks Two and a Half men is funny), I generally trust him.

The book was Power Play by Joseph Finder. Before buying it I didn’t even read what it was about, but upon picking it up the front cover screamed “Moves like a bullet from a gun” – Lee Child. Being a name I recognise as a decent writer I thought this was pretty decent praise. On the back there was also a quote from the Guardian – “Read the first page and you wont be able to stop – you’ll be hooked”.

Hmm, sounds like some decent hype there, a big name fellow writer giving him props, and a promise of it being a page turner from the very first page.

So I open it up and the first page (as taken from Amazons look inside feature) is this

I’m not hooked. I’m not desperate to read the next page. Bullshit.

But fair enough, hooked from the first page could be a bit of a hype to make sure you get interested quickly. What about the “moves like a bullet” quote? I’d read another line on the cover that let me know this book featured a kidnap plot, so I was thinking I’d be thrust into the action quickly.

Nope. Wrong again.

The book takes about 150 pages to kick into full gear. I’m not saying this is a bad thing – the slow build before that is pretty awesome and fleshes out most of the characters so that you actually feel like you know them and care or don’t care about certain people by the time the book starts. But even after page 150 it doesn’t move like a bullet.

Its an awesome book, but I’m finding myself more pissed off by the hype than how good the book was. As soon as I saw the words kidnap plot I was worried the book would go into one of those typical action book plots of “the main character used to be a ninja assassin but quit it but now he has to use his skills again to save the world”, but it wasn’t, it was fantastically written and you felt like there was reason behind everything. I’d be quite interested in a film of this, but I imagine the slow build of the book would be cast away for explosions and gunfire.

On a happier note I picked up a book called World War Z based on a few friends raving about it, and the hype is fully deserved. It’s a book written as a kind of recap of the Zombie infection that plagued the world, looking back and interviewing key people from the times. So awesomely written and such a different style to anything Ive read.

HOLY SHIT I UPDATED MY BLOG

Plus my website I use for achievement tracking isnt showing some achievements properly. Ugh.

Fifa 10
Was on – 220
Now on – 270 (19 of 44 achievements)

Jesus, for how much Ive played thats shockingly low. The big problem is I am addicted to online team play. The other big problem is the team I platy for has some unbelievably shit players and Im considering looking for another team. I’ll be playing this for a long time so will defintely be racking up some points.

Lego Batman
Was on – 175
Now on – 495 (22 of 46 achievements)

Now standing at just off 50% of the in game achievements. Ive completed the story mode with Rach so now just have to go through and collect all the minikits. Its a fun game and I can see me hitting 100% in the next few weeks.

Fight Night Round 4
Was on 455
Now on 790 (26 out of 30 achievements)

I ended up going on a mad boosting session for this, taking my created boxer through the career mode and picking up all the available online achievements. I didnt enjoy this one and traded it in straight after I’d done that.

Smackdown vs Raw 2010
Was on 145
Now on 850 (23 of 25 achievements)

I traded this one in too, despite saying Id keep hold of it for a while. Im a bit sad to have traded it actually, I really enjoyed it and despite a lot of shit it got from “fans” I thought it was a top game. But I was going to pick up Left 4 Dead, and they were offering £25 exchange for SDvsR10, which is more than you can buy the game for these days. I’ll probably pick up a used copy in a few weeks.

Sonic 3
Was on 70
Now on 200 (12 of 12 achievements)

Was feeling a little nostalgic, so took on this. Great fun, and really took me back. I wasnt as familiar with this game as I was Sonic 2 though, which I took on next..

Sonic 2
Was on 155
Now on 190 (11 of 12 achievements)

One left to get on this but its an online one which I wont bother with. This really took me back, its amazing how I knew each level off by heart. Cracking little game.

1 vs 100
New Game!
Now on 80 (6 of 12 achievements)

I like the 1 vs 100 beta they did so had a go at the new full game, and suprisingly they added free acheivements. Managed to pick up half of them pretty easily, not had a proper look at the rest yet and I dont really play this too much, so I cant see any more coming in.

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2
New game!
Now on – 485 (25 of 50 achievements)

I wasnt going to pick this up, but ended up buying it on a whim. Ive played about half the story, a fair bit online and been through all the Special Ops on Veteran with a buddy. Jesus, some of those are a bitch. Its a decent enough game and a lot of my buddies have 1000 on it allready, but I dont have the patience to go through the vetran mode on single player.

Lips
New Game!
Now on – 490 (19 of 49 acheivements)

Picked this up for Rach and have been playing it a little. Its a fun kareoke game but little things annoy me. Like we have Lips, and the lips extension disk Number 1 hits. We had number 1 hits first, and played that fine, then went to play the older game. But it showed no songs. WTF. Turns out we have to play it through the new game, but swap disks whenever we want to play a song from the old game. Even if we set up a playlist of like 3-4 songs from the old disk it makes us swap disks between each song. So retarded, and as a result we tend to only play from the newer disk.

Lego Star Wars – Complete Saga
Was on – 20
Now on – 240 (12 of 42)

ARGGHHH FUCK THIS GAME. Gonna have to play it through 4 times to get the 100% and havent even finished my first playthrough yet. So fustrating. Rach refuses to play this with me now as its camera is shit and the game just isnt as good as the newer games.

Left 4 Dead 2
NEW GAME!
Now on – 280 (16 achievements out of 50 won)

Havent played this enough. The servers for the game are totally fucked and kick me out of games, even when it says my connection is great. Ive got a bunch of achieves allready, but will get more. Its a great game being ruined by bad servers.

Viva Pinata: Trouble In Paradise
NEW GAME
Now on 440 (26 of 50 achievements)

ARGHHH FUCK THIS GAME EVEN MORE. Sent to me by a buddy for Rach, so I decided to have a quick go and stupidly picked up an achievement. This meant I had to play it, because now it would be ruining my percentage. Luckily I found you can cheat by scanning stuff with your camera by looking it up online so sat round for a few hours scanning shit till I got above 50%. Fuck you piniata.

I also picked up single achievements on Scene it, and two from Top Spin (lost the case so cant trade it in and now on 6/11)

So with over a month since an update where do I stand. I was on 21905 and 43.58%. But Ive got a few new games and managed to get some high achievement scores in some game Ive had for a while

So Im now on

FUCK YES

Almost 4 k in a month. Lovely stuff. And the percentage?

46.36 FUCK YES.

Job done.

Only joking of course

I dont have a strict guideline for what you need – basics are enough potatoes for chips for everyone, enough chicken for everyone. 2 eggs, some flour, bread, parmesan, and garlic.

Chop up some potatoes into chunky chips, like so. You can peel them first if you like, but I just wash the outside.

Put a pan on the hob, fill it with water, and put on the boil. When its boiling add the chips, then bring it back to the boil. Once its boiling again, cook them for approximately three minutes then drain them. Then put the colunder youve boiled them in back over the now empty pan, and put it on the heat for about a minute. This will help dry off the chips.

Pop your oven on to about 220degrees

Take the colunder out of the pan, and put to the side. Add a glug of oil and some salt and pepper to the pan, and heat up till you can see it sizzling.

Toss your chips into this, till they are coated, then transfer them to a baking tray.

I threw a few chilli flakes on top of mine at this stage to spice them up a little.

Pop them in the oven now, they’ll take approx 30 minutes to cook.

Now you can start on the goujons. To be honest this was the first time I’d tried these, so I didnt take pics at the start as I wasnt sure how they’d look

I bought some mini fillets, but you could cut some chicken breasts into strips. We had approx 335g of chicken which was way too much

Grab three slices of bread, throw them in a food processer. Add a handful of parmesan, a teaspoon of parmesan and 2 cloves of garlic. Whizz them up until fine.

Now get three bowls. In the first put some flour, the second an egg youve beaten, and in the third your breadcrumbs. Dip the chicken in the flour till covered, then the egg, then finish off with the breadcrumbs. This bits a little messy

When you’re done pop them all on a plate, and put them in the fridge for 10 minutes. This’ll help the breadcrumbs stick

Get a frying pan and cover the bottom with a good glug of oil. Then pop your goujons in

Heat them for three minutes on each sides. If you arent sure if they’re cooked then take one and slice it in half.

I did mine a bit too soon and my chips werent done, so I popped them on a baking tray and put them in the bottom of the oven.

And you’re done. Serve up

Fucking delishous.

First time I’d tried these and I’ll definately be doing so again. With the breadcrumbs you could throw whatever you like in there, I looked througha  ton of recipies and everyone does different. I liked the idea of the parmesan, and it went really well with the garlic.

Heres some pics!

It was absolutely freezing, we walked up and followed my pre match tradition of having fish and chips. I had curry sauce, and Rach only wanted chips – is it only Welsh people who like curry sauce?

We met up with someone I had to give some tickets to pre match, and he said “enjoy the prawn sandwiches” as we were sitting in the exec area. This made Rach think we got free food, unfortunately not her silliest comment of the night.

We did get a free program as we walked through the fancy exec area, and Rach prepared herself for the cold

The match itself, well Spurs battered us in the 1st half, but somehow we came into half time 2-0 up, thanks to two fantastic goals from Darron Gibson. We had pretty awesome seats with arm rests and cushions almost on the halfway line!

Rach was more excited though that at half time in the exec seats we got free tea and coffee. We warmed up, then afterwards went back for the second half. About 15 minutes in I realised I wasnt talking too much, turned to Rach to check if she was bored to be greeted by this

Oh Ayresy.

On the pitch we ran out the 2-0 win easily, me enjoying every minute

After the match we wandered home. A good night!