We’ve been on a downward arc recently when it comes to trying to conceive our first little heathen. (I say this completely out of love for the unborn, truly.) I’ve been feeling like this whole mess is pointless, my body is broken, boo hoo, I’mma go cry in a corner. Then I pulled myself out of that hole and decided enough was enough. Gotta be proactive, right? Right. You all probably know by now that our insurance doesn’t cover squat when it comes to the “I’m having trouble making a baby” department. We are on our own. And fertility treatments are expensive. Really fucking expensive. And that’s not a cost we’re willing to justify at this point in our lives, because they aren’t a sure thing. Too many risks involved. We would rather adopt if we can’t conceive on our own.

So what’s a girl to do when she’s up a shit creek without a paddle? Spend a ton of money on Amazon for herbal remedies, duh. I purchased Goat’s Rue, which is supposed to help lower blood sugar levels. It has had success in trials with diabetics, and since PCOS has symptoms that closely resemble diabetes (insulin resistance), I thought it was worth a shot. I’ve read about Cysters (ladies w/ PCOS) having success with it and figured WHY NOT? I also purchased Shatavari. Shatavari has uses in all sorts of applications from diarrhea to menopause. It’s supposed to help regulate hormone production, and has also helped women with PCOS achieve pregnancy.

And then there’s D-Chiro-Inositol. DCI is a member of the B vitamin family, even though it’s not actually a vitamin at all. We’ll call it a nutrient. Apparently DCI is something all people take in through their food, but women with PCOS expel/excrete it 6-10 times faster than those without PCOS. And since it’s a main component in the regulation of hormones, not having enough in your blood stream clearly poses a problem. So taking a DCI supplement can tell your body to chill the eff out with the making of the hormones, regulate that shit.  There was a study done with 44 women, all with PCOS. Half were given DCI and have had a placebo. Within six weeks, 86% of the DCI group had ovulated, which is fantastic.

Now I’m taking these tinctures (liquid forms of herbal supplements. They’re more concentrated and are supposed to work faster.) that taste like fucking dirt that’s been pissed on. YAY. I just have to keep telling myself that it’s better than spending all our money on fertility treatments** and that it’ll be worth it in the end.

**I don’t mean to say that fertility treatments are pointless for everyone. They just don’t make sense for us, at this juncture in life, with our current financial situation/insurance. If there were ever a time where my husband had different insurance, or moved to a job that paid more than what he makes now, we might consider it. But it’s just not right for us at this time. Thank you, now back to your regularly scheduled blog post…

All this TTC talk has had me thinking about all the stuff I want to buy for our future kiddo. Baby wearing is something that is really awesome to me. It just seems like the smart thing to do, keep your kid close to you and all of the warm fuzzies. I have a Moby wrap, a ring sling, and a pouch sling/peanut shell. I really want to get a woven wrap, but they are hella expensive. I get the cost, really. They’re usually hand made by traditional native weaving experts in South America and places like that. Those women deserve to get paid well, because weaving that a strip of fabric that long probably takes days. That said, I can’t justify the cost for myself, as pretty as they are, because there’s no guarantee it’ll fit me correctly! My Moby fits fine, but it stretches. And I know I’m going to grow in the belly department while I’m pregnant (duh) and it’s not going to go away very fast, so I need something longer.

My plan is to buy a long bit of cotton twill and cut it in half to make 2 wraps. Most twills are 60″ wide, so I can get two 28″ wraps (accounting for the hem on either side) out of one 7 yard piece of fabric. In comparison, a Moby wrap is 6 yards. Most woven wraps are also six yards. I’m sure they’d probably be just fine, but I’d rather be safe than sorry. And if I go in with someone, we can each get a nice woven wrap for under $50. Not bad.

Questions for you: Ever tried an herbal remedy? How did it work for you, especially if it pertains to TTC/PCOS? Ever made a woven wrap? Are you a fatty like me? How did it work out?

Happy Memorial Day Weekend, everyone!

I was SO WORRIED that this wouldn’t turn out well, but it ended up turning out perfectly. Score one for me! You can use your crock pot to make like… a shit ton of things. Turns out pasta is on that list. SO. How do you do it?

The first thing I did was toss in 3 chicken breasts that were mostly frozen. I covered them with two jars of pasta sauce (I was being lazy. I usually make my own!) and turned the crock pot on high for like 5 hours. I don’t really pay attention to how long stuff cooks in this thing, so pardon my lack of proper instruction. Basically, I stuck them in and then took a very long nap to get rid of a migraine. When I woke up it was around 1:30am.

I checked the chicken around 1:45, poked it with a fork to see if it was done. It was, so I poured in a box of penne, making sure the sauce covered the pasta completely. Branden got home around 2:15, and I checked the pasta. It had soaked up all the extra water from the sauce (you know how jar sauces are kind of watery) so I added about 6 ounces of water and stirred it all around. About 10 minutes later, it was done! And don’t worry, the sauce was NOT watery once the pasta was all cooked.  I actually think I’m going to make pasta like this more often, if I use jar sauce. It really cuts down on the watery-sauce-y-ness.

I cooked everything on high, mostly because I was in a hurry and because my chicken was still mostly frozen. If you’re using raw, thawed chicken, you could cook on low or high, depending on how soon you want to eat. DO NOT ADD THE PASTA AT THE BEGINNING OF COOKING. You will end up with a goopy mush, and no one wants to eat that, ok?

Have any of you made pasta in the crock pot? What types of noodles have you used? Anyone tried spaghetti?! I’d be worried about those noodles sticking together. haha.

Ingredients

• 2 cooked, shredded chicken breasts (I cooked mine and then pulsed them in my food processor a couple of times)
• 1 8oz block of cream cheese, softened
• 2 cups colby jack, shredded
• 1 packet of Hidden Valley Ranch mix
• a few splashes of hot sauce
• 2 cans of crescent rolls

Mix the chicken, cream cheese, cheese, ranch mix, and hot sauce in a large bowl. Unroll the crescent rolls, and keeping the rectangles intact, separate the sheet into quarters. (Two triangles equal one rectangle) Lay the rectangle out on your baking sheet, and place about a quarter cup of the chicken mixture on and roll it up, sealing the ends when you’re done. Place seam-side down on the baking sheet. Repeat until you’ve filled all 8 rectangles. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes. Then flip the rolls and bake for another five minutes.

In a debate about this subject, someone brought up the point that marriage does need to be defined. And they’re correct! Marriage should be defined. Here, let me try this out…

Marriage: A legal union between two consenting adults who love each other and wish to show a greater commitment than just being ‘together.’

Oh man. That was so hard. Only not really. It’s incredibly EASY to not let my personal views cloud my better judgement. Why is it not easy for others? Specifically, why is it not easy for Christians, those who cite verses from the Old Testament as their reasoning for why gay marriage/marriage equality is wrong, to not let their personal opinions cloud their judgement?

And true, if we’re going by the bible, Leviticus 18:22 says that men should not have sexual relations with another man as he would with a woman. (Paraphrasing here, but you can look it up yourself.) But, and pardon me if I’m wrong here, the whole world does not live by the codes set in the bible. And not only that, but this is the old testament! I was under the impression that old testament laws were no longer in effect/valid since the ultimate sacrifice of Christ was supposed to essentially wipe your slate clean?

Can someone explain to me why it’s ok to cite this one verse from the old testament as the law of god, but then totally deny or go against the other laws in the old testament? Do you own slaves? (Leviticus 25:44) Did you sell your daughter into slavery? (Exodus 21:7) Do you and your husband not touch while you are menstruating? (Leviticus 15:19-24) Have you put your neighbor to death for working on the Sabbath? (Exodus 35:2) Do you eat pork? (Leviticus 11:6-8)

All of these things are defined as law in the first few books of the bible. Is it acceptable to vacillate on this only if you are a Christian?  Do the laws of the old testament only apply toward marriage? More specifically, do they only apply towards GAY marriage?

And then we get into the sheer ignorance of the marriage equality opposition. People like Doug Phillips, who accused the president of “fundamental treason to his countrymen” for supporting marriage equality. Or Jeffrey Kuhner, who claims Obama is attempting to end “traditional” marriage to align himself with the “homosexual agenda.” Can someone please tell me what the homosexual agenda is? Is it some day planner that I’m missing out on? Is there a heterosexual agenda as well?

Then there’s Bristol Palin. You might remember her as crazy Sarah Palin’s unwed, teenage daughter. She made a statement recently in response to president Obama…

While it’s great to listen to your kids’ ideas, there’s also a time when dads simply need to be dads. In this case, it would’ve been helpful for him to explain to Malia and Sasha that while her friends parents are no doubt lovely people, that’s not a reason to change thousands of years of thinking about marriage. Or that – as great as her friends may be – we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home. Ideally, fathers help shape their kids’ worldview.

There are also those who claim that children can not possibly grow up to be well adjusted, kind, caring, intelligent, hard working members of society of they have two mamas or two daddies instead of a mama and a daddy. Well what about children of single parents? What about foster children in group homes? Are they doomed to live a less than stellar life because they don’t have a mom and a dad?

I guess my main question is- why does it matter so much to you what two consenting adults do in their personal lives? Also, does it really effect your marriage so negatively to have other married couples around you? Do straight couples effect you the same way gay and lesbian couples do? Someone please answer, because I’m trying to understand, I really am.

But to make a point- you’re entitled to your personal opinions and beliefs, just like I am. However, when your beliefs start infringing upon the rights of other human beings- I take serious offense to that. We are a country founded on the freedom of religion, and also the freedom FROM religion. No law with a religious intention should be passed to govern the general populace. Why is that so hard of a concept?

If you haven’t heard about Fifty Shades of Grey, well, that’s probably a good thing. Just in case, here’s a little run down:

When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.

Shocked yet thrilled by Grey’s singular erotic tastes, Ana hesitates. For all the trappings of success—his multinational businesses, his vast wealth, his loving family—Grey is a man tormented by demons and consumed by the need to control. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian Grey’s secrets and explores her own dark desires.

This book started out as a Twilight fan fiction. The fact that it even got through publishing surprises the hell out of me. This book REEKS of Twilight, it is essentially the same story. What? Don’t believe me? Let’s take a look at the basic plot of  the Twilight saga, shall we?

Mysterious, wealthy man with dark secret evades the advances of plain Jane, clumsy brunette girl, all the while secretly wanting to be with her. After a short time, they fall for each other. She gets into dangerous situations. He rescues her and admonishes her for being reckless. Dude drives a Volvo. Eventually, he decides to leave, thinking she is better off without him. There’s a lot of crying and heart ache, and eventually they get back together. Defeat bad guys. Get married, honeymoon, unexpected pregnancy. Fight about baby. Baby is born by emergency c-section, mom almost dies. Baby looks just like daddy. They live happily ever after.

And now, the basic plot of  the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy…

Mysterious, wealthy man with a dark secret wants to be with plain Jane, clumsy brunette girl. After a short time, they fall for each other. She gets into dangerous/unexpected situations, he rescues her, admonishes her for being reckless. He is controlling. Drives an Audi. Eventually, she decides to leave, thinking she is better off. There’s a lot of crying and heart ache, and they eventually get back together. Defeat a bad guy. Get married, honeymoon. Have an unexpected pregnancy. Fight about baby. Baby is born by emergency c-section, mom could have died. Baby looks just like daddy. They live happily ever after.

Let’s look at Bella’s family: Charlie. He’s a quiet man, a police officer. In to sports and fishing. Kind, but not one to often show his emotions. Divorced from Bella’s mother, who is remarried to someone younger. Renee is wishy-washy, starts projects but doesn’t often finish them, but loves her daughter very much. Lived in Arizona before moving to Florida for her husband’s career.

And Edwards family as well: Carlisle is a doctor, married to Esme. They “adopted” Edward into their family. Emmett, Edwards brother, is playful and loving. His sister Alice is fun and meddling.

And now a look at Ana’s family. Ana’s father died when she was very young, so her mother remarried Ray, who Ana considers her father. Ray is a quiet man, ex-army. In to sports and fishing. Kind, but doesn’t often show his emotion. Divorced from Ana’s mother, who is remarried. Carla is wishy-washy, starts projects and moves on from them fast, but loves her daughter very much. Lived in Nevada, but moved to Georgia with her current husband, Bob.

And finally, Christian’s family. His mother, Grace, is a doctor and is married to Carrick, a lawyer. They adopted Christian, as well as his older brother Elliot and younger sister Mia. Elliot is playful and loving. Mia is fun and meddling.

Christian and Edward both play piano, have dark pasts, and are controlling, wealthy men. Bella and Ana are both self-deprecating brunette women with subtle beauty that apparently goes unnoticed by each girl, but attracts the opposite sex like flies. Bella’s best male friend, Jacob, is tall, dark and handsome. Edward disapproves of their friendship because Jacob is attracted to Bella. Jacobs father is friends with Bella’s dad. Ana’s best male friend, Jose, is tall, dark and handsome. Christian disapproves of their friendship because Jose is attracted to Ana. Jose’s father is friends with Ana’s dad.

The stories are both set in the Pacific Northwest. Bella works for a family-owned sporting goods store. Ana works for a family-owned hardware store. They are both hit on by coworkers or someone tied to the business in some way. Bella drives an old Chevy truck. Ana drives an old Volkswagon Beetle. Both ladies have a personal scent that attracts their men to them.

If they made a Fifty Shades of Grey movie, they could use the same cast, the same locations, and some of the same filler. E.L. James, the author of this shit storm is riding the coattails of Stephenie Meyer’s success. The writing is incredibly juvenile. (In both books, quite honestly.) There’s a serious overuse of certain adjectives (“delicious” springs to mind) and nouns (“foil packet”). There’s a sex scene every twenty pages or so, though, so if your thing is erotica, this is probably a good trilogy for you to check out.

I honestly kind of liked the book, crappy as it was. I must have a thing for badly written books with boring heroines, because I liked Twilight too. Then again, me liking Twilight completely explains why I’m fond of Fifty Shades of Grey.

Fifty Shades of Grey… Mommy porn.

defer:

To submit to the opinion, wishes, or decision of another through respect or in recognition of his or her authority, knowledge, or judgment.

When my husband and I got married, I did not promise to obey him. He did not promise to obey me. In fact, our vows had nothing traditional in them at all. (One day I’ll post my wedding vows for you all to see, but suffice to say that I promised really silly things because that’s how our relationship is.) We vowed to love each other through all things, and that’s really it. That’s all you need, love.

Ok, so it’s not all you need, you need communication and loyalty and honesty. But having a whole lot of love sure helps.

My point is- I didn’t sign up to be his subject. I signed up to be his partner. His equal. And that’s exactly what we are. Yes, he’s the one who works. It’s still our money. Yes, I’m the one who stays home. He still helps me clean the house. We make decisions together, about everything. Neither of us decides to do something without consulting the other first.

As I said on my Facebook page and my Twitter- marriage is a partnership, not a dictatorship. Neither of you can or should hold all the power.

So knowing these things about my own marriage, it really pains me when I see other women who constantly defer to their husbands. There’s no way that this can lead to a healthy relationship. Just because you got married doesn’t mean your decision making power is gone.

Why do women submit? Why do they not feel worthy of being an equal partner in their marriages? I really do not understand it.

Mother’s Day is almost here and we are celebrating with our love for cloth diapers!

Welcome to the Mother’s Day Cloth Diaper Giveaway Hop hosted by Daily Mothering! Nearly 100 blogs have linked up to bring you dozens and dozens of exciting cloth diaper giveaways. Enter my giveaway below and then hop to the other blogs listed at the bottom of this post to enter their fluffy giveaways too! Each blog has a cloth diaper prize valued at $15 or more, and many blogs have prize packs worth over $100. And, don’t forget to enter the GRAND PRIZE giveaway at Daily Mothering for your chance to win this amazing $1300 Cloth Diaper Prize Pack!

In honor of my FIFTH blogiversary and Mother’s Day, I wanted to bring you a fun giveaway. As you may know, Branden and I plan to cloth diaper our children from birth. Cloth diapering is not only inexpensive (saving you an average of $1500 per year, per child!), and better for the environment (drastically reducing the amount of waste your family contributes to landfills), they’re better for your kiddos AND they’re super cute!  There’s not much better than a chubby baby with a fluffy bum, am I right? :D

So today I’m bringing you a beginners cloth diapering kit. Even if you only replace a few changes per day with cloth diapers, you’re significantly lowering your waste output. One cloth diaper per day adds up to 365 diapers that won’t be in the landfill at the end of your child’s first year.

The prize:

• SIX BumGenius 4.0 cloth diapers (gender neutral colors)
• One Kissaluvs Wet bag in purple swirl
• One 2oz tub of Earth Mama Angel Baby Bottom Balm (cloth safe)
• Five sample packs of Rockin’ Green (3 Classic rock, 2 Hard Rock)
• One Dozen flannel wipes

                                          

How to Enter:

Follow the directions on the rafflecopter form below. Complete as many of the entries as you’d like. A blog post comment is MANDATORY. If you do not comment, all other entries will be void. All entries WILL be verified, so please be honest!

***If your comment does not show up right away, please do not panic. All new comments are held for moderation by WordPress. I’ll approve your comments when I can. :) ***

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Please be sure to check out all the other AWESOME cloth giveaways happening this week! And definitely stop by Daily Mothering to enter to win the grand prize, worth over $1300!

Things haven’t been much better. I’m not worried, though. I cut my dad out of my life completely that day, and the only way I’d let my mom back in is if she stops drinking and divorces my dad. (Both of which are highly unlikely.) My sister has had more contact with either of them than me, but she owes them more money than I do. A couple of years ago, my parents put a down payment on a lawyer so my sister could finally start the adoption process with my nephew. (We were also battling his bio-mom for custody, but she went back to jail.)

When all this went down, my sister said she wasn’t paying them another dime, and I don’t blame her at all.

Let’s visit the department of back story for a moment, shall we?

When I was in elementary school (third or fourth grade) my great grandpa sent a check to each family member on my dads side. So every one of my aunts, uncles and cousins got a check for $10,000. He even sent one to my sister, even though most of my dads side of the family chooses to ignore her existence. So what’s a third grade kid supposed to do with $10k? Apparently nothing, if you ask my parents. that check was written in MY name. If nothing else, it should have been stuck in a savings account until I graduated to help me pay for school. (That didn’t happen, just so you know. I’m almost $14k in debt over school.)

I was allowed to spend $100, and so was my sister. The $19,800 left over, that went to whatever my parents decided to spend it on. They didn’t pay off our house, I know this because when we moved out of it my senior year of high school, they were having trouble making both the old house payment and the new one. They didn’t pay off their cars, because my dad has an obsession with leasing new cars, and my mom always gets his leftovers.

So when my dad texted me today to tell me I still owe them $800 for helping me buy my camera… It took everything I had not to tell him he owed me $9000.

Monica Leonelle is a well-known digital media strategist and the author of three novels. She blogs at Prose on Fire (http://proseonfire.com) and shares her writing and social media knowledge with other bloggers and authors through her Free Writer Toolkit (http://proseonfire.com/free-writer-toolkit).

Ima would give anything to escape The Dome and learn what’s beyond its barriers, but the Chicago government has kept all its citizens on lockdown ever since the Scorched Years left most of the world a desert wasteland. When a mysterious group of hooded figures enters the city unexpectedly, Ima uncovers a plot to destroy The Dome and is given the choice between escaping to a new, dangerous city or staying behind and fighting a battle she can never win.

I REALLY enjoyed this book. It’s written well, and is in my favorite genre- young adult. In general, I love anything geared toward teens that also involves sci-fi action adventure and some sort of romance. Socialpunk does all of that, with a little bit of mystery and intrigue thrown in for good measure.

This was a pretty fast read. I’m not someone who usually finishes books very quickly (I’m still reading The Help, It’s been about 3 months.) but I had this done in two days. I just could not put it down! It really pulls you into the story and makes you want to find out what’s going to happen next.

The story reminds me of the Uglies trilogy mixed with The Matrix, but still unique in its own way. One of the best things about the book is that it seems so plausible, like there’s a chance that some day in the distant future, this might actually happen. It’ll take a lot of technology though. ;)

All in all, I would definitely recommend this book. I’m really looking forward to the next installment of the story, and I can’t wait to find out what happens!

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I figured I’d show off some of my most recent layouts. I’m not that great yet, but I’m getting inspiration from other scrappers. :D

One of the bad things about digi scrapping is realizing that I haven’t been taking nearly as many pictures as I used to. I guess it’s time to really pull out my camera again and start taking it everywhere with me like before.