Tara on the Wander

celebrate: may day with may baskets and war paint

2012-05-01T13:30:00.003-07:00

I had no idea how obscure May baskets are! I grew up celebrating May Day with handmade paper baskets full of flowers and treats. We played the game of delivering them to a doorstep, ringing the doorbell, and running so as not to get caught and kissed!

I introduced my boys to the tradition this morning. We painted and assembled our baskets all before 8am. We planned to deliver via bike in our little neighborhood. I had the boys buckled into the bike trailer and ready to go when I realized it was still 7-something am.

Stalling for time, I texted neighbors to see if they were awake. I added a little war paint to scare off any would-be kissers. Turns out, the warpaint was totally unnecessary because none of the boys' friends had ever played the May Basket game. But I bet they'll be ready for us next year...

pictured here: the rare family shot

2012-04-13T08:10:00.000-07:00

i am so so so grateful to the kind soul who snapped this with the ol' iPhone. surely he has no idea how few family shots of us looking in the same direction ...

pictured here: groupie

2012-04-12T14:05:00.001-07:00

the point of being in time out is utterly lost on dylan (which makes it also lost on jack in this instance) who thinks surely if his big brother is doing it, it must be fun!

pictured here: camera face

2012-04-03T08:31:00.000-07:00

Oh boy, here it is. *This* is his camera face, the one he dons whenever I ask him to look toward the lens. Isn't it darling?

pictured here: behind

2012-04-02T21:30:00.000-07:00

Photos like these are the reason I wanted to revive tarawanders.com.

celebrate: a baby shower set in paris

2012-03-31T08:10:00.001-07:00

Champagne and macarons, what more do you need to celebrate the pending arrival of a baby girl?

For this Paris-themed baby shower, we tried to keep it simple. The dinner menu was inspired by The Barefoot Contessa. She's all about quality ingredients and keeping things simple and fresh.

-Provencal Potato Salad
-Crudites Platter - so simple and fresh, served with a lemon vinaigrette
-Cheese Platter - be sure to find pregnancy-friendly (pasteurized) cheeses

I'd discovered a patisserie in town that makes delightful macarons and baguettes and I found yummy savory Tartes Francaises at Costco to round out the meal. I always tend to overdo the food at these sorts of events but really tried to restrain myself this time which meant I was terrified in the hours before that I'd not have enough food. (There was plenty, and even better, everything was ready when guests arrived so I was free to enjoy a glass of champagne or two.)

I found an Eiffel Tower teether and we decorated with fresh flowers from the garden, a simple bunting banner and an image of the Eiffel Tower. I made a playlist with music by Django Reinhardt, Carla Bruni, and from the Midnight in Paris soundtrack.

I dare say, this was my most favorite party to date!

pictured here: outdoor dining

2012-03-29T08:34:00.000-07:00

We've been eating lunch outside all week. I set their plates down and they drop what they're doing to sit down at their table. This never happens inside!

pictured here: under the table

2012-03-27T08:58:00.001-07:00

Since I've been devoting more time to Boots & Tea and Tara Romasanta Photography, I couldn't figure out what to do with this space. I didn't want to let it go, so I figured I'd just let it sit until I knew.

I think I know.

I'll be back soon! I promise.

and baby makes ...

2012-01-16T23:24:00.000-08:00

Puppy makes three, and soon there will be four. This puppy was hilarious. He ran right up her belly a few moments after this shot was taken.

And then two days after this photo was taken, baby boy made a much earlier than expected arrival. He's a preemie but is doing remarkably well.

words, words, words

2012-01-05T09:10:00.001-08:00

I chose the word breathe as my word for 2012. The next day I started getting itchy. Is this the right word? Shouldn't I be trying to do more? I saw all these other lovely, active words spiraling around me: soar, cultivate, connect, do, decide, focus ... and I loved them all.

Breathe feels decidedly unambitious. I mean, I do it without thinking, right? Except that's just it.
I don't want to take anything for granted this year. I want this to be a year of gratitude. Of being present. It sounds so simple and it is ... but it also isn't.

When I started working at Aveda, I loved the idea that I could attend a yoga session during my lunch hour. I had the hardest time, however, focussing my attention on the mat when my mind was buzzing from the go-go-go busy-ness of work. Many times I just couldn't do it. I'd show up with my mat but I just couldn't stay there, not when my to-do list was screaming at me. I felt like I was hyperventilating. Much later, I found that focusing on my breath -- being present on the mat -- was the single most important to-do of my day. On those days I returned to my desk focussed and refreshed and I was able to do so much more.

farewell 2011

2011-12-31T17:42:00.000-08:00

Farewell 2011. I can't imagine a year much better than you. I can imagine a year with more sleep, but other than sleep deprivation, I have very few complaints.

We welcomed a new baby into our life at the start of 2011. He's almost one and I can't imagine our life without his big-hearted, raspy-voiced happiness.

I started a photography business -- which has taken my energies away from this here blog. I've not yet decided what to do with this happy space, so it will remain as it is for now, if quietly.

The epic road trip to Minnesota and Chicago was both a highlight and something we'll never do again. (We will fly. The end.) The cherry on top was the promotion Julius received upon return.

I took and posted a photo every single day at Boots & Tea.

Camp Shutter Sisters still seems like a dream.

Dream was my word for 2011 and it was a good one.

camp shutter sisters was but a dream

2011-10-24T00:15:00.000-07:00

I sit here while my boys nap, my one daylit hour to myself, and wish myself back to Camp Shutter Sisters. I'm obsessively checking the Flickr stream, Instagram*, and Facebook for evidence it wasn't a dream, that I didn't make it all up.

When I got wind of the camp, I set an alarm so I wouldn't miss the chance when tickets went on sale. I knew I needed to attend. I told my husband I would sell my wedding dress to help pay for it. I put both boys in front of the t.v. (which I almost never do) so I could be online when the clock struck. Good thing, too, as it sold out in 15 minutes. Dylan was teeny-tiny when I signed up to go. By his 9th month, it was time. It wasn't easy physically (hello, pump) or emotionally (hello, sobfest) but definitely, it was time.

I'm still struggling with the words to describe what went on at camp. Holly described it as an "epic meeting of kindred spirits" and that comes pretty close. Debra talked about meeting the "photography people in her computer," and I love that too, especially now that I'll be able to hear their real voices in my head narrate their stream of online beauty.

I think my roomie Mae took this one of Holly and I.

I was most looking forward to uninterrupted time to play, think, talk, breathe photography in a way that never, ever happens in my daily life. With two little boys underfoot, I mostly shoot from the hip, without a chance to double check (or even check at all) my settings. There is no such thing as setting up a shot. The minute I get into an editing groove, I hear them wake from their naps. I do post at least one photo every single day but the scarce night time I do spend editing cuts into my time with my husband, my chores, and my sleep.

The camp fairies seemed to have read my mind. The formal sessions started at 9am which meant I had the choice (the choice!) of sleeping in, or of getting up early to wander with my camera in the morning light, of going for a run, of eating a leisurely breakfast, or, all of the above.

Everything about the event seemed similarly thoughtful and generous and welcoming and kind.

We didn't do cheesy icebreakers.
We did make s'mores.
We started our first day together with a silent photo walk.
We listened to beautiful stories told by the most beautiful hearts.
We gave ourself permission.
We didn't judge each other by the size or brand of her equipment.
We did try each others' lenses.
We took countless timer photos.
We saw the world through dreamy lenses (thank you Lensbaby!).
We put our fears - literally - on the shelf.
We didn't edit in solitude, but in the company of peers, drink in hand.
We printed our photos (thank you HP!) and gave them to each other like valentines.

And now I'm watching the same experience unfold again and again through each others' eyes and and I can almost hear the click of shutters and feel the sand between my toes again.

I sit here while my boys sleep, and wish myself back to that place. A place with no diapers to change, or toys to pick up, or tantrums to weather. A place where I had permission to fill my day as I chose, a place where people I admire gave so willingly of their expertise. A place where instead of editing quickly and in solitude against the clock, I did so in the company of others, glass of wine in hand, so happy to celebrate the beauty created by my new friends. (Can you all come over to my house and edit with me again tomorrow? I'll provide booze.)

My super ancient iPhone took this.

I don't have regrets, but I do wish I'd taken even more photos. I wasn't as social as I thought I would be, but I gave myself permission to embrace the quiet I clearly needed. (I also realized my social skills have taken a hit since one of my constant companions can't yet talk and the other jabbers incessantly about poop and cars.) My biggest dilemma at Camp was choosing between equally tempting sessions. More than once, I made a split second decision to attend a different session and found it was (indeed, and as promised) exactly where I needed to be.

As much as I needed to be away, I also needed to return to my loves at home. Time is time is time and you never have enough when you need it but later they will be big and I will wish them to be small again and I am so happy to be home again with my loves, and my camera, sometimes still struggling to be present, definitely wishing for more sleep (But, but, but! Dylan finally and at long last started sleeping through the night! It was his welcome home gift to me, the best ever in the history of the world.) but mostly contented knowing Camp was indeed a dream, the best kind that you find yourself wanting to fall back asleep for, the kind you close your eyes to see one last time.

Except when it is a camp full of photographers, you can open your eyes and see it again and again and again.

Thank you, Tracey, thank you Myriam and Jen, thank you Shutter Sisters. You have no idea. Or maybe you do. I think maybe you do.

*I'm late, so very late to the Instagram game. This new-at-long-last addiction is worthy of its very own post.

embrace the camera: october

2011-10-13T07:08:00.000-07:00

Jack was so bummed that his mama was going to a party without him. I promised there would be no balloons at this party and that it wouldn't be very fun. And then I asked if he'd like to be in a photo with me and that helped a little...

p.s. I'm still rocking a broken finger and typing is more like pecking with lots of typos. Sorry for the quiet over here!! This shot was taken more than a week ago, I hope that is okay?

smells like maple syrup

2011-09-21T06:10:00.000-07:00

I started taking fenugreek supplements to improve my supply of breast milk. Within days, my supply had noticeably improved. As an added bonus, I started smelling maple syrup wherever I went. Perhaps this explains my sudden craving for pancakes. And ice cream. And chocolate chip cookies. And the five pounds I gained in one week, eek!

There is always a flip side, isn't there? Weight gain is only a minor bummer because a) I'd just finally lost all the baby weight b) enough so to purchase a brand new swimsuit (a two-piece even!) but 5 pounds is 5 pounds and no-way, no-how am I going to wear it in public until that 5 goes back where it came from! Also, I have a ball (!) to attend this weekend and my dress would look better if I weighed what I did when I bought it ... oops!

But I've been pumping more and Dylan seems more satisfied at every feed so definitely the extra padding is worth it. Dr. Google instructed me to take fenugreek only until the supply is (re)established, so we'll see what happens in week 2, after the supplement.

i take photographs

2011-09-13T08:38:00.000-07:00

so, i decided to make it official!

do stop by and say hello to my newest baby.

and here's the facebook link - help me kick this thing off right!

the one about breastfeeding

2011-09-12T07:08:00.000-07:00

Gosh, it has been a long time since I've written an actual, honest-to-goodness post.

But I really feel the need to talk about breastfeeding. I'm just so right in the thick of it.

For starters, I'm exhausted. Dylan eats every three hours, night and day. If you're doing the math, that is eight months of no sleeping through the night, for me or for him.

Probably he's old enough to be sleeping through the night and I could cut out a feeding but (isn't there always a but?) his lack of weight gain is a pretty big concern. He did fine until his 7 month (as in a one-month late 6 month) check. He'd gained a measly 1/2 pound since his 4 month check. Granted, we'd been travelling for an entire month, during which time he'd cut two teeth and started eating solids, all capped off with a two-week bout of all sorts of bugs, but still.

We went in two weeks later and he'd gained a 1/2 pound which was good but not great.

I love that his doctor was not at all pointing at fingers at my breast milk supply at that 7 month appointment (even though I was). By the second appointment though, we talked about whether or not I was producing enough. I'm definitely not overproducing. When I pump, I'll get 3oz, or maybe 5oz on a really, really good and well-hydrated day.

I bring water with me everywhere. (We do live in the desert.) I'm eating whole grains. I've started taking Fenugreek. We've also tried supplementing with formula but so far, he's not a taker.

Dylan has another weight check tomorrow.

I nursed Jack for almost exactly one year but we had to supplement with formula for him, too, by 10 1/2 months. I'm not sure why this is stressing me out so much except that I don't intend to have another baby and I want to nurse him as long as he remains interested (and nourished!) and I'm definitely not ready to be done but ... I'm also really tired.

And I hate, hate, hate the thought that he might not be getting enough. Probably the solution is obvious but I'm not there yet, I'm just right here.

i heart faces :: white

2011-08-28T21:00:00.000-07:00

i heart faces :: pet

2011-08-21T21:05:00.000-07:00

I had the toughest time trying to decide between these two from a newborn photo shoot last week. Destin is the sweetest, most gentle dog ever and I literally hoisted her up onto the bed so I knew she wasn't going anywhere anytime soon (or we wouldn't have propped baby T up on her).

http://iheartfaces.com

h + b = baby m

2011-08-21T12:37:00.000-07:00

I was beyond excited to take photos of Baby M. I'd been able to sneak a quick glance of her a few days earlier when I stopped by their house. All that gorgeous hair had me excited with posing possibilities. I brought baskets and headbands ... and I had a grand plan in my head of how this newborn shoot was going to go. Well, you know what they say about making plans.

The funny thing is, I have a feeling her parents might say something similar about the circumstances surrounding her birth. (Her birth story is not mine to tell but I will say I get teary-eyed every time I hear it. Suffice it to say Daddy and Baby M had some serious bonding time right from the get-go but everyone is more than fine now and that is all that really matters.)

I just love these intimate shots. Maybe even more so because they aren't according to plan. They're just real. And beautiful, just like baby M.

Baby M knows what she likes. She likes to be cozy and bundled. (Can't you just feel the love?)

Or in her parents' arms, as she should.

Congratulations, again you guys. I feel so lucky to have spent this time with you and Baby M. Thank you for opening your home and sharing your heart, your gorgeous baby girl with me.

And really, who needs a headband when you're dealing with this much perfection?

Destin + Tate :: destined to be best friends

2011-08-16T13:08:00.000-07:00

My beautiful friend Karen wanted photos of brand new baby Tate with her first baby, the furry and most lovable Destin.

Destin isn't quite sure what to think about the new (and sometimes noisy) baby but she could have posed for the camera all day and she took quite a liking to the prop blanket I brought with me. She also, apparently, really likes carrots and if we wanted her to change position, we'd tease her with the prospect of carrots. She is quite possibly the most gentle dog on the planet. Once she settled in, she didn't move an inch and we got braver and braver placing Baby Tate near (and even on!) her.

This is just a quick preview of the session; some of my favorites are yet to come. Karen, congratulations again on your little bundle of sweetness. I so enjoyed spending time with you yesterday. Motherhood looks very good on you.

i heart faces :: beautiful eyes

2011-08-14T21:22:00.000-07:00

He was a somewhat reluctant model for me this morning, stingy with the smiles, but just when I was about to give up he told me, "Mama take eyes," and I realized he wasn't being reluctant at all. This is who he is.

camera face

2011-08-11T12:54:00.000-07:00

I've never, ever seen him squint before I gave him this toy camera today. I guess I know where he learned to make this camera face. Monkey see, monkey do.

herding rabbits

2011-08-09T10:21:00.000-07:00

My mom *really* wanted her grandkiddos to have matching shirts so we could get a nice (ha!) photo of them, together, on our vacation. So, she got the shirts, and even ironed on their names. Alas, the day was a rainy one and we were stuck indoors which meant these four were even more wound up than usual.

Breezy Point Resort, Minnesota

i heart faces: friendship

2011-08-08T07:25:00.000-07:00

On day two of our four day drive to Minnesota, Jack told me he wanted to, "Go home, see Tucker, best priend." I placated him on the long drive with lots and lots of prizes and while he was fairly easy to distract along the way, ("Look Jack, a BULLDOZER! ... COWS! ... MORE COWS! ... HORSES!) he never stopped talking about his beloved best "priend" the entire month we were gone. When it was time to say goodbye to his cousins and grandparents, we told him we would be going home to see Tucker, and he made a beeline to the car. I didn't need nearly as many prizes on the drive back, because the biggest prize was waiting for him at home!

Can you imagine the tragedy then, when we arrived home at a bleary-eyed 4:30am, to an empty house, no Tucker in sight? (Tucker was staying with family.) We thought we'd be able to potato sack Jack off to his room for a few hours of shuteye, but no. Jack cased the joint, in search of his friend, and then had a meltdown as only two year olds can.

Tucker and Jack were reunited just a few hours later. Tucker showered Jack in wet doggy kisses and Jack reciprocated in delighted giggles and all was well and good in our world again.

we're home!!

2011-08-07T12:03:00.000-07:00

hi friends,

we're home! i had no idea how much i'd missed the desert. i have so much to tell you about our month away, other than the little teeny bits and pieces i may (or may not?) have posted. the drive back was even more epic the drive there because instead of biting it off in small 6 hour pieces, we decided to gulp it down whole, all 24+ remaining hours of it.

i've missed posting here. one of the good things about long drives? plenty of thinking time! look for more from me soon...

seeing double - on our last day in mankato

whatever - dylan is a little trouble maker!

sweet - we missed tucker so much! (jack especially missed his best "priend")

bright - iPhone sunset in ND from at the start of the grueling 24+ hour drive home

space - a iPhone sunset in WY from the same day on the super longest drive home

Go see more weekly winners at Lotus' or photo scavenger hunters at: