Congrats, Bob!

- PAUL REVERE’S MOTHER: “I don’t care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight is past your curfew!”

- MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY’S MOTHER: “I don’t mind you having a garden, Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?”

- MONA LISA’S MOTHER: “After all that money your father and I spent on braces, Mona, that’s the biggest smile you can give us?”

- HUMPTY DUMPTY’S MOTHER: “Humpty, if I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!”

- COLUMBUS’ MOTHER: “I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You still could have written!”

- BABE RUTH’S MOTHER: “Babe, how many times have I told you-quit playing ball in the house! That’s the third broken window this week!”

- MICHELANGELO’S MOTHER: “Mike, can’t you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?”

- NAPOLEON’S MOTHER: “All right, Napoleon. If you aren’t hiding your report card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!”

- CUSTER’S MOTHER: “Now, George, remember what I told you-don’t go biting off more than you can chew!”

- ABRAHAM LINCOLN’S MOTHER: “Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can’t you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?”

- BARNEY’S MOTHER: “I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but you’re starting to look a little purple.”

- MARY’S MOTHER: “I’m not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you.”

- BATMAN’S MOTHER: “It’s a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?”

- GOLDILOCKS’ MOTHER: “I’ve got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?”

- LITTLE MISS MUFFET’S MOTHER: “Well, all I’ve got to say is if you don’t get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there’ll be a lot more spiders around here!”

- ALBERT EINSTEIN’S MOTHER: “But, Albert, it’s your senior picture. Can’t you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something …?”

- GEORGE WASHINGTON’S MOTHER: “The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!”

- JONAH’S MOTHER: “That’s a nice story, but now tell me where you’ve really been for the last three days.”

- SUPERMAN’S MOTHER: “Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we’ve decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?”

- THOMAS EDISON’S MOTHER: “Of course I’m proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!”

I’ve had a rotten week, mostly, as I’ve had a nasty digestive condition which caused sudden, unplanned dashes to the bathroom. So I kept in close range and even moved some furniture around so as to have unimpeded access. Girl Next Door (GND) whispered a palliative in my ear & even drove to the pharmacy to get the needed tubing and stuff for me. So, twice a day, I did the simple procedure, and it made life a lot more convenient – no more unplanned dashing off when calling a client or engrossed in complex code!

Sunday rolled around, and as I felt better, I decided the cleansing events didn’t need to be so close. I also needed to prune some dead branches from the palm tree out front, twenty or so feet up. So I got my twenty-four foot extension ladder out (exactly the same climbing equipment used on Everest expeditions!), extended it all the way, and climbed up the ladder carrying a saw. When I had almost finished trimming, two things happened: I leaned out too far & barely saved a nasty fall by grabbing a branch. Then that awful feeling of pressure hit! I slid down, jumped the last few feet and rushed inside. Thankfully I made the Thunder Bowl!

We should learn something from each new day. Today I discovered that it is good to keep your fronds close and your enemas closer.

Dave.

PS. This story was posted on the Whitney Zone, then a friend sent it to another acquaintance who is climbing Mt. Everest. So it is probably all over Base Camp, where they are probably easily amused, having nothing to do, no palm trees, but plenty of ladders and…