Teh Panis

Christmas Gift Guide - 2021

2021-11-25T16:46:00.001-05:00

ELECTRONICS

High-Pressure Duster

This amazing gadget replaces those cans of compressed air - which can be SUPER expensive. It's basically a reverse vacuum cleaner. It gently (or not so gently) blasts the dust out of your electronics. But you'll discover other uses all around the house. In addition to computers and electronics, this thing is great for dusting all kinds of furniture with intricate features or hard-to-dust crannies. A+ Highly recommend. Do yourself a favor, and buy one for yourself too. link here

Dusting Gel

Here's another product I recently discovered but now I can't live without. Just shove this slime into your cracks and crevices, and when you pull it out, all the dust comes with it. Just like the High-Pressure Duster above, you'll find TONS of uses for this around the house. This stuff is great for all those nooks and hard-to-dust corners where you can't quite get all the schmutz out. I use this goo on my computer keyboard AND my piano keyboard, my usb ports, the vents on the back of my tv, on my intricately carved mirror frames... just for example. Your dusty crevices don't stand a chance. link here

Wyze Cam v3

This little wi-fi camera has tons of features for a great price. It has 2-way audio, 1080p color night vision, and an easy-to-setup app for your phone or tablet. It's waterproof, so you can use it indoors or out. Best of all, it comes with FREE 14-days of video storage - meaning you can view all your motion/sound triggered videos for the past two weeks from your phone. And if you add the Cam+ subscription for only $15/year, you get TONS of other features including person/package/pet/vehicle detection and customizable alerts to your phone. This means, for example, you can tell the camera to alert you if your neighbor's dog gets into your back yard or when UPS drops off a package on your front porch. And because of the 2-way audio, you can use it to talk to someone in your house when you're away or you can use it to tell your dog to GET AWAY FROM THAT CHRISTMAS TREE! You do you. I have two of these, and they're fantastic - all for about $35 bucks. link here

JBL Flip 4 Waterproof Bluetooth Speaker

Do you have a bluetooth speaker in your bathroom? Because you absolutely need a bluetooth speaker in your bathroom. I use mine to listen to music, podcasts, and audiobooks while I'm in the shower. The Flip 4 is ipx7 waterproof, so you don't need to worry about dropping it in the bath. It has JBL's amazing audio quality. You can connect 2 phones simultaneously because sharing is caring. And it has 12 hours of playtime between charges. That's a lot of showers. And unlike the newer Flip 5, the Flip 4 has an integrated microphone which means you can answer/place calls while you're in the shower PLUS you can use Siri or Google Assistant too. I LOVE LOVE LOVE this feature because I can use google assistant to create a reminder or add an item to my shopping list while I'm in the shower. Makes me feel like a real Judy Jetson. link here

BAR

Weighted Boston Shaker

Listen. I went to bartending school. I worked as a bartender at a fancy hotel on Miami Beach. I should know about these things. And yet for years, I used some crappy cocktail shaker that I acquired randomly a billion years ago. Don't follow my example. Spring for a nice, weighted cocktail shaker. It makes a HUGE difference when you're building your cocktails. The weighted bottom keeps the tumblers from tumping over as you add liquids and ESPECIALLY ice. Unlike cheap cocktail shakers, these things are sturdy. Turns out, that's pretty important. Don't forget the Hawthorne strainer. Dishwasher safe. link here

Professional Citrus Press

Should you spend 80 bucks on a professional citrus squeezer? I mean, probably not. But if you have the room and the budget for this bad boy, you will absolutely love it. There's not much more to say. It juices citrus fruits and pomegranates like a boss. Can you use it to make non-alcoholic citrus drinks? I guess so, but you're asking the wrong person. Some parts dishwasher safe. link here

Luxardo Cherries

Are these things actually worth $25? OMG YES! Period. End of. link here

BATH

Foreo Luna Ultrasonic Face Thingy

I love this thing so much I wrote a whole blog post about it. It's pretty expensive, and I'm not convinced it cleans your face any better than using your boring old fingers. But damn, it sure does feel good. And it lasts for months on a single charge. I paid roughly $120 for the v2. This v3 is about the same price but it adds app connectivity. Do you need app connectivity for your vibrating face sponge? Fuck no. So if you want the no-app v2, you can get it for about the same price. Definitely not a necessity, but if you want to feel like a real fancy-pants in the shower, this is how you do it. link here

Cordless Scalp Massager

It's a rechargeable scalp massager. What else do you need to know? OH! It's waterproof, so you can use it in the shower. But personally, I think it feels better to use it dry. link here

Portable Bubble Spa

A few years ago, I bought this thing as a kind of joke. I thought there's no way it would actually work as promised. BOY HOWDY was I wrong! When you turn this baby up to full strength, it will beat the SHIT out of you, and I mean that in the best way possible. This thing feels BETTER than a built-in spa tub. It's worth every penny and then some. I love it so much. Or I should say I LOVED it so much. Because we moved a few months ago, and now we don't have a tub. And the first thing I said when we bought this place was OMG WHAT WILL I DO WITHOUT MY BUBBLE SPA?!? If you have a bath tub, you absolutely need one of these. Thank me later. link here

Silicone Back Scrubber

I've been using this silicone back scrubber for a few years, and it's great. It works way better than an impossible-to-clean back brush and it lasts a lot longer than those exfoliating towels I used to buy at my local Asian market. Makes a great stocking stuffer. link here

Silicone Foot Scrubber

I've tried quite a few foot scrubbers over the years, and this is my favorite. Suction cups hold it firmly in place, and after you rinse it off, you can stick it on the wall to drip dry. link here

Personal Care

Gillette ProGlide Shield Vibrating Razor

If you've never used a vibrating razor, you should give it a try. It reduces the likelihood of nicks, cuts, and razor burn. ProGlide razor cartridges have 5 razors which is TOO MANY IMO. But they also have a single razor on the reverse side for detail work. The cartridges are pretty expensive, but you can usually find them on sale. And if you dry them after use, they'll last a long time. This razor is specifically marketed to men, but WTF does that even mean? Women love this razor too. And for good reason. link here

Norelco OneBlade Trimmer/Shaver

I've used a OneBlade for the past few years, and it has seriously changed my life. It will give you an ALMOST razor-like shave. Or snap on one of the 3 included guards, and use it to trim your beard. I also use the biggest guard to trim my eyebrow hairs because I've apparently entered THAT phase of my elderly existence where facial hair just keeps growing and growing and I know I know, TMI. It's waterproof, so you can use it in the shower. I prefer to use it dry or in the shower with shaving cream. You can use the top or bottom blades for shaping the edges of your beard, which is super convenient. And the flat side provides a shave that's nearly (but not quite) as good as a razor. If you use an electric razor, you need to buy one of these immediately. If you use a conventional razor, this may not replace it completely, but you probably want one of these too. Bottom line - if you have facial hair, you absolutely want one of these. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED! link here

Norelco Bodygroom

OK, let's get real. For years, I tried to figure out how to trim the unruly hairs on my nutsack (I warned you we're getting real). After a bunch of research, I bought a Norelco Bodygroom. And let me tell you, this thing works like a charm. It has an adjustable trimmer on one end for chest hair, and underarm hair and, y'know, pubes if you're into that. On the other end, it has what seems to me a hybrid between an electric razor and a OneBlade (which I love, see above). It'll give you an ALMOST razor-like shave basically anywhere on your body - even on your dick and prune-like balls. (I told you we were getting real here. Don't judge me) Even on your saggy, craggy low-hangers, it'll give you a pretty close shave without drawing blood. The electric razor side is extra-wide so it's also great for your back or your chest, or your legs, or your GIGANTIC asshole (you know who you are). I feel like every man should own one of these. I can't recommend it enough. link here

Wahl Rechargeable Hair Clipper

If you know a guy who buzzes his own hair, a rechargeable clipper is a must. These are SO much more convenient than the corded version. And only 20 bucks! link here

The Best Hand Soap Is NO Hand Soap

2020-08-24T18:54:00.000-04:00

When I first started researching moisturizers a few years ago, the first thing I did was to put bottles of lotion beside every sink in the house. Every time I washed my hands, I followed up with some lotion. And HOLY COW, that made a huge impact on my fingees. It basically transformed my gnarled old claws back into dainty digits.

See? Not a claw.

After that, I wondered whether I could skip the lotion and just find a hand soap that was moisturizing on its own. So I tested all the hand soaps. And, spoiler alert, they all SUUUUUCKED. Cheap hand soaps sucked. Expensive hand soaps sucked. Hand soaps labeled "moisturizing" were invariably the OPPOSITE of moisturizing. Eventually, I decided to give up on hand soap altogether, and I suggest you do the same.

Instead, I wondered whether body wash might give better results. So I bought every kind of drugstore body wash I could get my hands on. And let me tell you, the results were nearly as tragic with the body wash as they were with the hand soap. In most cases, so-called "moisturizing" body wash was anything but. The vast majority of the body washes I tried were drying and overly fragranced. But one product worked like a charm.

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I Bought A $200 Vibrating Sponge, and I'm Not Even Mad About It (Foreo Luna 2 Review)

2020-06-10T12:20:00.003-04:00

A few years ago, I started seeing rave reviews for this contraption...

Foreo Luna 2 for Men

That's the Foreo Luna 2 Facial Cleansing Brush, and at the time, it was selling for around $200. Crazy, right? But the craziest part was that the reviews were AMAZING. Right now on Amazon, it has a 4.4/5 star-rating. People love this thing. So the first time I saw it on sale, I sprung for it. But I should probably explain WTF this thing does before I explain why you should buy one.

The Best Non-Greasy Spray Sunscreens for Body and Scalp

2018-10-10T22:11:00.001-04:00

I spent the last 2 months testing non-greasy spray sunscreens. I was looking for the best sunscreens that work well on the body and also on the scalp. I specifically avoided brands marketed as "sport" or "kids" because these products are texturally unsuitable for scalp use. Instead, I looked for brands marketed as "dry," "lightweight," "non-sticky," etc.

Are you looking for spray sunscreen to use on ur big bald head? If you just want to jump straight to my #1 pick, click here. Otherwise keep reading, baldy.

Here Are The Only Drink Coasters That Don't Suck

2017-12-13T06:30:00.000-05:00

These past few years, I've been on a mission to find the perfect drink coasters. Ideally, I wanted coasters that were absorbent, quick-drying, dishwasher safe, and heavy enough that they never stick to the bottom of your glass. I also wanted them to look nice, but I was willing to settle for an ugly coaster that just worked. And boy, did I try A LOT of coasters.

These coasters suck.

I bought every kind of plastic, rubber and silicone coaster I could get my hands on, but they ALL stuck to the bottom of my glass - even though a lot of them SPECIFICALLY said they wouldn't. That means condensation from your glass drips down and pools in the coaster (they usually have a rim to keep the water contained). So far, so good. But then randomly and inevitably, the coaster would stick to the glass which means all that water spills all over your table or your lap or whatever. And then after that water goes everywhere, the coaster falls off the glass and rolls across your floor and into that tiny space between your TV stand and the wall. Fuck these coasters. They suck.

Get Rid Of All Your Disgusting Kitchen Sponges - Here's How

2017-11-09T08:21:00.003-05:00

Y'all know I'm constantly researching random stuff like laundry detergent, pet treats, and blankets (just off the top of my head). Yes, I have spreadsheets for everything from blenders to sex toys (don't judge me!). You probably also know my memory ain't what it used to be. So I've decided to keep track of my most favorite products with a new feature I'm calling "Stuff I Like". Original, I know. For my first entry, I'm going to recommend something completely innocuous - but something I absolutely LOVE: Sinland Dish Cloths.

It's World BackUp Day, So Back Up Your Stuff! Here's How...

2017-03-31T15:44:00.004-04:00

Today is World BackUp Day. Which I'm convinced is just another fake holiday invented by Hallmark to sell cards. I'm still waiting for World BackDatAssUp Day.

No, but SRSLY. When's the last time you backed up your shit? Think about all those family photos stored on your phone or laptop. You know you're eventually going to drop those devices onto a hard floor. Or into the toilet. You're such a butterfingers! How will you feel when you lose all those years of precious memories?
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Shopping For A VPN? Tips and Recommendations

2017-03-30T20:05:00.000-04:00

What is a VPN, and why would you want one?

You've probably heard the US Congress just voted to allow your ISP to track your online browsing details and to sell that data to 3rd parties (mostly advertisers) without your consent. If you're concerned about privacy or if you just don't want your ISP all up in ur biznass, you should consider using a VPN. In short, a VPN routes all your internet usage though a private server so your ISP can't see the web sites you visit.

Another benefit of VPNs is that you can trick some sites into thinking you're browsing from a different location. So if you want to watch BBC online, you can use a VPN to make the BBC site think you're browsing from London (assuming your VPN has an endpoint server in the UK - most do).

A third benefit of VPNs is that they make browsing on public WiFi much more secure. For example, if you're using the WiFi at Starbucks or Target, it's possible that someone could see your login information when you sign into web sites or use web services like email or instant messaging. If you use a VPN, it's nearly impossible to retrieve your personal data - even on publicly accessible WiFi.Because of the new congressional ruling, I know a lot of people are shopping for a VPN service, so I wanted to provide a few guidelines.

VPN Shopping Guidelines

1) Make sure your VPN is encrypted.

Most VPNs are encrypted. But if they're not, your ISP can still track your data, and hackers may still be able to view your sensitive data when using public WiFi.

2) Make sure your VPN doesn't keep logs.
Some VPNs don't keep any logs at all. That's the best option, but those VPN services may be more expensive. At the very least, your VPN should have a publicly available logging policy that specifies they do not log the sites you visit. If you're on a budget, you might choose a VPN that logs metadata such as bandwidth as long as those logs are purged after no more than 7 days. This does make your VPN connection very slightly less secure, but it helps VPN operators optimize their servers and reduce costs.

3) Do you need customer service?

Decent VPNs are available for only a few bucks per month, but don't expect much from their Customer Service departments. If you can install applications and follow a few technical instructions, you shouldn't have any trouble setting up your VPN service without support. But if you expect any detailed customer support, expect to pay (a lot) more for your service, and be sure to search the web for other customers' experiences with your VPNs Customer Service department before you agree to any long term contract.

4) How many of your devices will use the VPN?
Many VPNs place limits on the number of devices that can use the service. Generally, there are 2 kinds of limit - CONCURRENT devices and TOTAL devices. Concurrent devices means the number of devices using the VPN at any given time. If you're watching YouTube on your laptop while reading email on your phone, that would be two concurrent devices. TOTAL device limit refers to the number of devices on which you can install the VPN software. For example, you may be able to install the VPN software on 5 devices, but you might only be able to use 2 of those devices at the same time.

5) Which services does your VPN allow?
Some VPNs block specific protocols (e.g. bittorrent) either completely or on a subset of their servers. So if you're interested in using your VPN to download torrents, be sure to check the fine print. It's worth noting that many content providers (e.g. Netflix, Amazon Video, Youtube, etc) regularly block the use of VPNs to view their region-locked content. In many cases, VPN providers can bypass these blocks within hours or even minutes, but there is no way to guarantee you will always be able to bypass specific region locks via any given VPN.

Price

Consumer-oriented VPN services range from a few bucks per month on the low end up to maybe $20/month on the high end. Unless you have specific requirements, I'd recommend looking for a plan in the $3-$5 range. You may receive a discount for purchasing a year or more of service at a time. But if you want a real bargain, StackSocial.com always has VPN deals on sale - including lifetime subscriptions that range from about $20 up to about $100.

Further Research

It's pretty easy to research specific VPN services and providers just by googling. You might also want to visit TorrentFreak.com for detailed recommendations.

Fabric Softener 101

2016-08-16T06:59:00.002-04:00

So I'm looking into fabric softeners because of course I am. And it seems everyone agrees liquids are better than dryer sheets, and dryer sheets are better than detergents with included fabric softener. That's not exactly news. But in Consumer Reports' 2008 guide, they say most modern fabric softeners (Snuggle was an exception) do NOT actually make towels less absorbent. Good Housekeeping recommends using liquid fabric softener on towels at half strength, but only when needed. I'm gonna have to give that a try.

The more you know, bitches! Bing, BING, Bong, bing.

Beware Off-Brand USB Type-C Cables and Adapters

2016-07-05T01:36:00.002-04:00

This is a public service announcement. If you have a new phone/tablet/laptop that uses the new USB Type-C standard, use only the original cable/charger/adapter that came with your device. Using an off-brand cable can fry your charger. That means if you plug your phone into your computer, a crappy cable can permanently destroy all your computer's USB ports at once.

Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Laundry Detergent, Bleach, OxiClean, and Pre-Treaters

2016-05-22T03:52:00.002-04:00

DETERGENT

Today, I spent WAY too many hours researching laundry detergent and enzymes. I also may or may not have bought a $30 Consumer Reports subscription just so I could read their laundry detergent recommendations. I also may have ordered some chemicals from a bulk supplier so I can run some further experiments on my laundry. Yes, I have issues. But that's not what I'm here to talk about. I actually found out a few pretty important things about laundry today, and I know you're just dying to find out what they are. So here goes...

Mosquito Repellent Study Says Lemon Eucalyptus Oil As Effective As DEET

2015-11-11T20:10:00.001-05:00

A new study on mosquito repellent says Skin So Soft DOES NOT WORK. Like duh. But Victoria's Secret Bombshell does? Weird. I don't think that's a good fragrance for me though. Organic repellents don't last more than a few minutes. Those dumbass patches actually ATTRACT mosquitoes. As if. And most surprisingly, lemon eucalyptus works about as well as DEET.

I've always been a big fan of DEET. Sure, it might make you grow three heads with long-term use, but that's still unquestionably preferable to contracting West Nile virus or Lyme disease. But given these results, I'm probably going to try the lemon eucalyptus. HOWEVER, it's important to keep in mind that eucalyptus isn't necessarily safe just because it's a plant extract. Eucalyptus oil is a possible carcinogen and its toxicity is still unknown. Still, those risks seem WAY more acceptable than the risk of contracting west nile virus or malaria IMO.

Should You Buy Name-Brand OxiClean Or Bulk Sodium Percarbonate?

2015-07-04T07:26:00.001-04:00

Last year, I tested whether OxiClean is better than generic oxygen bleach. Somewhat surprisingly, name-brand OxiClean was the clear winner. Now, I want to see how OxiClean fares against sodium percarbonate (the active ingredient in OxiClean) I ordered from a chemical supply merchant (for ordering information, scroll down).

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Should You Buy Name-Brand OxiClean Or Does Generic Work Just As Well?

2014-10-16T06:28:00.002-04:00

At many dollar stores, you can buy LA's Awesome brand oxygen cleaner for $1/lb. OxiClean normally sell for about $7.50 for a 3-pound tub, so that works out to $2.50/lb. The dollar store version is significantly cheaper, but does it work? That's what I wanted to find out.

First, I added some blue gel food coloring into a jar of water and mixed it until the gel was completely dissolved. I filled two glasses with 50 g each of the blue water. Next, I added 2 g of OxiClean to the glass on the right and 2 g of LA's Awesome to the glass on the left. I stirred both mixtures for one minute, and then I waited to see which one neutralized the food coloring fastest. Below are my results.

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What's The Difference Between A Calendar Event And A Task?

2013-10-11T21:51:00.000-04:00

Okay, I WAS going to write something snarky about a famous celebrity or something stupid about tampons like I usually do. But then I remembered I have a computer degree and a background in project management. So why not post something informative and try to make this world a better place? Not that my tampon posts aren't informative, but you know what I mean.

So on most calendars, you have the option to create an event, and you also have the option to create a task. And sometimes, deciding which one to use is confusing because they're very similar. But here's the short explanation: events have a duration; tasks do not. You can have an all-day event like a birthday, or you can have an event with definite start and end times like a conference call. But the important thing to remember is that events have a duration. They last for a specific period of time.

On the other hand, tasks have no specified duration and are simply requirements that need to be fulfilled. For example, "Buy milk" is a task and not an event. It doesn't matter how much time you spend shopping for the milk. As long as you bring the milk home, the task is complete.

Now, there are three main reasons why people get confused when deciding between tasks and events. First, they can both be attached to dates and times. Events always have start and end times, while tasks can optionally have a due date (or time). Just remember that events have a duration, but tasks do not.

The second main cause of confusion is that sometimes events and tasks can overlap. If I need to call my brother on his birthday, I would enter that as a task using his birthday as the due date. But once I schedule a call with him from, say, noon to 1pm on his birthday, it changes from a task to an event because it now has a specific duration.

Third, events can have tasks attached to them. For example, if I schedule a meeting with the sales department on Friday from 9-10 am, I would enter that as an event because a meeting has definite start and end times. But if I need to create a sales report to bring to the meeting, I would enter that as a task using the event start time as the task's due date.

See? It's so simple. You probably feel stupid for not knowing all this in the first place. But don't be so hard on yourself. I appreciate stupid people. I truly do. If it weren't for stupid people, no one would laugh at my jokes. Hell, no one would read my blog. So pat yourself on the back, dumbass. And take comfort in the knowledge that now you're just a TEENSY WEENSY BIT less stupid than you were before you read this post. Oh, and you're welcome.

Don’t store your cucumbers in the refrigerator

2012-07-13T19:03:00.001-04:00

Pfft. According to UC Davis, the optimum temperature for cucumber storage is 50-55°F (15°C=60°F).

I live on a freaking subtropical island. Where the hell am I supposed to put a cucumber where it will stay at 55 degrees? When you live at sea level, root cellars aren’t an option. Oh well, I guess the moral of the story is to eat them right away. Pfft again.
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Should I Make My Own Dishwasher Soap?

2012-07-07T06:04:00.000-04:00

This one is easy to answer… No. No, you should not.

I’ve experimented with lots of recipes…

with baking soda

and vinegar

and kool-aid

and kosher salt

washing soda, borax, blah, blah, blah...

THEY DON’T WORK. Don’t listen to anyone who says otherwise. They’re on crack. We tested many, MANY recipes for homemade dishwasher detergent, but the best result we got was a bunch of dirty dishes. Worse results included mineral films and sticky residues. But let me be very clear about this… NONE of the homemade dishwasher recipes actually cleaned the dishes. None. Not one.

Also, don’t believe anyone who says you can substitute vinegar for rinse aid. That doesn’t work AT ALL.

Oh and FYI – a few years ago, most detergent manufacturers removed TSP (Trisodium Phosphate) from their formulations because it’s bad for the environment. At the time, many people actually noticed a marked decrease in the effectiveness of their dishwasher detergent. The good news is that you can buy a box of TSP next to the paint thinner in any hardware store. When you have a really stubborn load of dishes, just throw in ½ tsp of TSP with your normal dishwasher detergent. Still better for the environment because you only use it when you need it.

Should I Make My Own Laundry Soap?

2012-07-06T03:24:00.001-04:00

If you’re the kind of person who likes to buy a very basic laundry detergent to which you add your own bleach/fabric softener/etc, then you should DEFINTIELY start making your own laundry soap. It could save you hundreds of dollars each year. And the homemade soap works just as well as the national-brand laundry detergents.

On the other hand, if you prefer to buy the super-fancy laundry detergents with built-in bleaches and brighteners, you will be disappointed with the homemade laundry soap. It’s just plain-old soap – which works well for normal laundering but won’t tackle set-in stains or strong odors. You also have to stir or shake the soap before each use because it tends to separate. That said, as long as you add your own chlorine bleach, color-safe bleach, and stain pretreaters (not all at the same time, OBVI!), you’ll have perfectly clean clothes, AND you’ll save a bundle.

Just for kicks, I stained 2 rags with a variety of messes and washed them in a national brand vs the homemade laundry soap. Here are the results.

(generic laundry detergent: left – homemade laundry soap: right)
BEFORE:
AFTER:

As you can see, the homemade soap held it’s own, but neither performed all that great. Fact is, if you have set-in stains or grease stains, it doesn’t matter what kind of soap you use – you need a pretreater, and/or you need to soak your laundry. That’s just a fact of laundry life.

My favorite recipe is listed below. It stores easily in a 2-gallon bucket. The cost of the cheapest generic laundry detergent is about 14¢. The cost of this homemade laundry soap is less than 2¢ per load. Keep in mind that you’ll still need to buy additives like bleach and pretreaters – but in the end, it’s WAAAAAY cheaper to make your own laundry soap. Each 2-gallon batch costs about 75¢ and will clean 64 loads of laundry.

Homemade Laundry Soap
⅓ bar soap, grated (Fels Naphtha or Zote - Ivory works too) [35¢]
½ cup washing soda [20¢]
½ cup borax powder [20¢]

Add the grated soap to 6 cups water. Stir occasionally over medium heat until soap dissolves. Add the washing soda and borax. Stir until dissolved, and remove from heat. Pour 10 cups hot water into a 2-gal bucket, and then add the soap mixture. Stir. Finally, add 1 gallon of cool water. Stir before each use, and use ½ cup per load.

This soap is also a terrific general-purpose cleaner. Great for concrete and brick.

Fruit Shrub - the best drink you've never heard of

2012-01-13T18:40:00.001-05:00

It's official. I've declared my delicious and easy fruit shrub recipe to be The Drink of 2012. And once you've tried this recipe, you'll see why. If you don't know (and you almost surely don't), the word shrub derives from the Arabic word for drink (so does the word sherbet). Shrub is basically a sweet-and-sour fruit syrup that you mix with water or seltzer to create a refreshing drink. You can also add vodka or rum if you're trying to get someone liquored up. The drink's tartness really masks the taste of any alcohol (but you ain’t heard that from me).

My Instant Fruit Shrub recipe is cheap and incredibly easy to make. You probably already have the ingredients in your pantry. And considering the health benefits of drinking vinegar, it's much better for you than most other sweetened drinks. The traditional method requires macerating fruit in vinegar for 24 hours or more, but I've simplified the recipe. My version goes from pantry to glass in less than ten minutes. You can use any kind of jam, jelly or preserves, but if you don't want pulp in your drink, use clear jelly or you can filter the finished syrup through a sieve lined with a coffee filter. Any kind of vinegar works too, so go crazy. Here are a few suggestions to get you started.

Instant Black Raspberry Shrub (microwave method)

Ingredients
¾ cup apple cider vinegar
½ cup black raspberry jelly

In a microwave-safe, glass or ceramic bowl (DO NOT USE PLASTIC!), combine the ingredients and whisk thoroughly. Cover with a damp paper towel, and microwave on high for about 8 minutes or until the mixture reaches a syrup-like consistency. Remove from heat.

**Add about 2 tbsp of the shrub syrup to a glass of water or seltzer. Stir, and enjoy.**

tip: Dip a spoon into the syrup to see how thick it is. Your shrub syrup is ready when it coats a spoon. Keep cooking until it reaches the desired consistency.

Instant Ginger Shrub (stovetop method)

Ingredients
¾ cup white vinegar
½ cup sugar
¼ cup fresh ginger – sliced (no need to peel it first)

Combine all ingredients in a small saucepan. When the mixture comes to a boil, reduce heat to medium-low, and simmer for about 5-10 minutes. Remove from heat and strain.

**Add about 2 tbsp of syrup to a glass of water or seltzer. Stir, and enjoy.**

As a half-joke, I made some green olive shrub the other day. To my surprise, it was actually delicious and refreshing. Sweet, salty, and sour - very interesting. This is a FANTASTIC and surprising party drink if you make it with vodka instead of water.

Instant Olive Shrub (stovetop method)

Ingredients
¾ cup white vinegar
½ cup sugar
¼ cup sliced olives (any kind)
a few dried, hot peppers (definitely optional)

Combine all ingredients in a small saucepan. When the mixture comes to a boil, reduce heat to medium-low, and simmer for 5-10 minutes. Remove from heat and strain.

**Add about 2 tbsp of syrup to a glass of water or seltzer. Stir, and enjoy.**

If you can get your hands on some guava paste, that makes a TERRIFIC shrub. And this is a great way to get rid of over-ripe bananas. Experiment! Try different vinegars and different jellies/jams. I’ve tried making this at least a hundred different ways, and I’ve loved them all.