On Friday I woke up with some slight aches & pains, I just thought it was from hiking the day before. After running errands all day, around 2 pm I started timing these uncomfortable feelings. They were coming at a pretty consistent pace. I took a bath that night to help with the aches, I got out & went to go get dinner while my husband took care of our older 2 girls. When I got home I noticed the cramps were a little stronger, so I gave Mary Anne a call around 8 pm. She suggested that I call my mother-in-law to come to get my girls. So while we waited, my girls helped set up the birthing pool for me.

Around 9 I called again to confirm that the waves were getting stronger & closer together & they should head my way. Mary Anne, unfortunately, was unable to attend, but she sent Celesta who arrived at 9:50, then Holly at 10, then Isabella, & finally Jordan at 10:10.

A little time later I asked if I could get into the pool & they said yes. By this time, the waves were strong in my back & hips, so Holly gave me counterpressure. After about the 3rd time of counter pressure, I was in the process of taking my shorts off & felt the urge to push while the girls were getting things together. At this time it was 10:36, Celesta walked behind me & noticed that my baby was in the water. My husband picked her up as I finished taking my shorts off & got situated. It was the best birthing experience I could have ever had! I’m so thankful for Mary Anne & her team of amazing women.

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The post Lucy’s Birth, a Powerful Story first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

Around noonish I started to feel those cramps in waves. Matt had mowed the yard and he came in we were going to have lunch. I said boy these cramps are kind of intense when I do feel them! Since we were having a home birth, we had a list of supplies needed. We had gathered things and had everything in the back of the dining area. The cramping started to pick up how often they were coming, and I decided to start timing how often they were coming and how long with an app my midwife told me to use. At this point it was about every 20 minutes. (I still hadn’t acknowledged I was in labor, but I did realize they were indeed contractions) I then told Matt we needed to get the supplies and our bedroom prepared. As Matt was frantically getting things ready and tiding up the house, I continued to time the contractions.

Matt ended up picking up Greeah around 3pm, and the older girls got home around 3:30pm by that point the contractions were about every 7-10 minutes. They were really taking my breath away when I would have them and I really had to focus on breathing and not tensing up. (Note: It is indeed challenging to focus on breathing through contractions while a 2-year-old is climbing on you, telling a 9-year-old to get ready for practice and an excited 13-year-old is nonstop asking you if the baby is coming yet! ha-ha). By 3:45 Matt left with the 3 girls, dropped Hailey off at practice.

Since baby was past 40 weeks, we ate all of our “first meal post baby” food so Matt, Keaton and Greeah stopped at Costco before coming home. While at home I was having some pretty intense contractions. However, they were not the typical 1 min 30-second-long contractions. Some were lasting 45-30 seconds long.

I had never been “checked” so I had no idea how dilated I was. (With Keaton I got to the hospital at 4cm and 100% effaced and major contractions. With Greeah, my water broke and when I got to the hospital, I was 4cm dilated and 60% effaced. Based off my history, I just assumed I was around 4cm) I was very thrown off how much pain I was in so quickly as I had OVER prepared my mind and body for labor. I thought no way in hell I can do this all night long. I was really doubting myself.

I went to the bathroom & lost my mucus plug with a good ole bloody show. I called Matt and said get home now!! I called my midwife shortly after I called matt~ around 4:15pm. I sent her my contraction log I had been using. I had two contractions on the phone with her and I could talk through the first. They were ranging 3-6min apart and a lot lasting 30 seconds. It wasn’t your typical 5-1-1. She advised me to drink more water as it could be why they were so inconsistent. I started to cry a little, she asked what was wrong and I told her I was scared. I was just scared of the unknown and I was home alone. She was so supportive and sweet to me & stayed on phone just before Matt got home. He got home and we asked Keaton to help watch Greeah. I was really struggling and starting to doubt myself. (Again, in my mind I was a four and was thinking I had a LONG night ahead of me) I told Matt I made a huge mistake & I don’t want to do this. He told me I was so strong; I could do this, and I would regret this forever if I gave up. I told him, “No I f-ing won’t!” (Hahaha). I was having contractions it felt like every 3-5 minutes and they were so irregular with their duration. In between contractions I remembered Hailey!! I told Matt to call Cheris to have her pick up Hailey from practice. (Us moms never stop worrying about our kids!) Poor Matt. He was still tiding up and making our bed, hitting the timer on our app to record them every time I yelled “another one!” I was on the toilet laboring, just sitting helped me. I asked Matt to fill the master bath. As he was filling it up, he starts trying to clean off the bath bomb residue. I nicely (ha-ha, not) yelled “I don’t give a DAMN how clean this tub is! I need to get in NOW!!” LOL. I had a little regret getting in as my midwife had told me she waits until transition to have the moms get in. I didn’t “think” I was at that point, but as soon as I got in it was a little relief.

Midwife called back around 5:20pm to check in and Matt spoke to her. She told him she was going to come by to check on me. It felt like eternity waiting on her. I had Christian Hypnobirthing app playing and that plus Matt’s counter pressure on my back was helping me get through each contraction. I literally felt like I was getting a beating and I felt like I was not getting any relief or a break before the next one started. She arrived around 5:50pm. I remember looking up and telling her I was sorry. She said for what? I said I know you want your mothers to wait until transition to get into the tub. She laughed and said oh honey, I think you are further along than you realize. She asked if I wanted to be checked. I told her yes. Her and Matt helped me out of the tub and while walking over to the bed I fell to the ground and had two more contractions. Matt was literally planking on my back and the pressure was helping. When we got on the bed, she checked and said you are a 9cm and there is baby’s head! I felt relief. And shock!! She immediately calls her team. Tells Matt to get me back in tub. Matt said should I fill up the birth tub? She said we do not have time. At 6:10pm an assistant arrives.

I’m laboring in bath, leaned over & grabbing Matt’s arm. I told Midwife I don’t want to do this & I am scared. She told me suck it up buttercup, you don’t have a choice. Thousands of women have given birth before. Ha-ha. I asked how much longer. She said very soon. She told me the hard part was over and I would meet my baby very soon. She told me pushing would feel better. At about 6:15pm the second midwife/assistant arrives. My body started to push on its own. I was trying so hard to relax. I felt a pop. My water broke. I felt a burning sensation. I thought I was tearing. (Found out later I did not) Midwife then tells me when I feel the need to push, just push. I was confused what that meant, but then it just came so naturally.

My body was pushing on its own! (Here to say that Fetal ejection reflux is very real!) She was telling me to push when I felt the need. I started to, but my pushes were weak. I just felt like I had no strength. She said you have to push a good long push for her to come down. The next contraction I did just that. I felt her head going further down. I think maybe two more times I did those pushes. By the 3rd time I knew this was it. I just pushed with all I could and felt her head come out. I waited another second, or minute- I have no idea. (Keaton later told me she heard me screaming & it sounded like I was being stabbed. She said Greeah kept saying “Mommy hurt, Mommy hurt.” Keaton told her Mommy is having her baby & she said Greeah started to giggle! “But I gave another push, and her body was out at 6:27pm.

We got out of the tub, and I delivered the placenta shortly after on the bed. We had our “skin to skin” alone time while they cleaned up & helped get my first meal.

Despite the chaos, it was incredibly peaceful and intimate. If I could’ve done it all over again- I would have had all my girls at home. I’ve never felt safer and more comfortable in my home with my incredible Midwife. It wasn’t how we “planned.” We didn’t get to use the birth tub we rented with the pretty curtain lights behind it. But it was perfect the way it was!

The post Fast and Furious Birth! first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

About 10:30pm I noticed contractions started like they had been doing on and off for about a week and were uncomfortable again (which aided to the “I’m so ready to have this baby” feeling) so I got in a warm bath to try to relax and then get some sleep. I relaxed and was drowsy, but the contractions just kept coming and seemed infrequent to me….not consistent, but definitely persistent, so I reluctantly called Mary Ann about 11:30pm and asked if it was true labor or not since my first was an induction and I had not been through going into labor naturally before. I could not give her concrete answers and was very unsure if it was true labor, so she had me time them for an hour and call her back to let her know.

They were about 4.5-5 minutes apart! It was now about 1:00 and she was on her way, and we were having a baby!!!! When she arrived, I was walking around and just working on relaxing and bending or squatting through each contraction and then preparing things between or answering any questions. Soon after, the contractions got a little more intense, so I got in the shower and let the warm water run over my back and “woa” through each contraction. Since it was early in the morning, I was getting a little fatigued, so I got out and sat on the birth ball and leaned/laid over onto the side of our mattress and almost “napped” between contractions.

When those just got too intense for me to rest between, I made my way back to the shower to help with calming my body to be able to work through the labor. I was in the shower when I really started that feeling of, I need to go #2 and involuntarily started a short push! I heard MaryAnn tell my husband and Holly ” That sounded like a push…was that a push? Yea she is pushing…we need to get her in the tub.”

I had already asked to get in the tub a few minutes earlier, so it was already prepped for me, and I made my way into the tub! *RELIEF* (I HIGHLY recommend a birthing tub – while in a big warm bath, you don’t have to use any energy to support your body. You can work on nothing but relaxing your body and your body pushes the baby out) I already had two short pushes in the shower and my body kept wanting to push in the tub, so I just followed it and pushed when my body wanted to and worked on relaxing in between.

About 7am and in just a matter of minutes, my water broke, and baby Neal was out and laying on my chest. I kept hearing “you made it look easy,” but I promise you it was not me at all. My body took over the labor and I just used my mind to calm myself, listen to my body, and listen to my husband, Holly, or Mary Anne to coach me through. Oftentimes you’ll hear “I wish I would have” or “next time I will” with birth stories, but with this home water birth with Mary Anne and Holly, it was beautiful. I wouldn’t change a thing and I hope to do it over again as many times as the Lord allows me to. 

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By 4:30PM rushes had gotten pretty uncomfortable – I had to really breathe through them – but they weren’t very consistent. I called Baby + Co & Mary Anne & they both told me to try to relax – make dinner – watch a movie & go to bed – baby would probably come in the middle of the night.

Baby had other plans – by 5:30PM we started the 1 hour drive to Baby + Co because I knew baby was really making his way down. We got to Baby + Co at about 7:30PM. The midwife checked me… only 4 cm. I was so sad. We (me, husband, Mary Anne) went to the birth suite where rushes officially started coming every 5 minutes – active labor! I labored on the birth ball, toiled, in the bed & tub.

Ate a snack – threw it up – then transition came. Oof. I was checked one more time at 7cm. I labored in the shower during transition. I sat under the rain shower head & Mary Anne ran the other shower head up & down my back. My husband and Mary Anne were there through every contraction. I had THE BEST support team. Eventually I requested to get back in the tub. Just a couple of rushes later and it was time to push. Yay!

After only 45 minutes baby made his grand entrance. My team was perfect – baby was perfect – all was well. Praise God for midwives, doulas, supportive husbands, and a perfect baby!

Birth is amazing!!!

The post Reid’s Birth Story: Doula Client first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVX2BhyBu4

The post Dr. Josh and Dr. Chelsea Axe Birth Story! first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

At around 9:45pm while I was snoozing away I felt a little pop, and I woke up very suddenly sure that I had just peed my pants. I went to the bathroom, peed and pooped and inspected my underwear, it looked like clear fluid with white flecks in it. I drink so much water that my pee is usually clear anyway so I was not convinced this was amniotic fluid. But when I stood up from the toilet more fluid came out and dripped down my leg and that’s when I knew it was my water that had broken.

There were a lot of emotions racing at that moment. It was a week before my due date and I was so convinced I would go late, with it being my first baby, and because I’m generally an impatient person I expected God would use this opportunity to teach me patience. I was shocked and excited, I was scared and nervous. I felt so peaceful and calm for all that was happening, I was so sad my mom and Michaela weren’t there and knew there was no way they could make it. We facetimed my mom and saw the disappointment on her face as I told her the time had came and she realized she was going to miss the birth. The same thing happened on our FaceTime with Michaela. There were so many things I was going to do before I went into labor! Padsicles and affirmation cards and labor aid and snacks for the midwives and I really wanted banana bread. I was so thankful Val was there. Daniel had a friend flying in that he was supposed to have some writing sessions with the next three days. I wanted to clean our bathroom it was so dirty.

I had been having contractions in the evenings for quite a few days and I wasn’t having more than normal at this point. I knew it could be a loonnggg journey ahead of us so I hopped in the shower and had Daniel clean our bathroom and Val drove James back to their house. I decided to try to rest and get some sleep. Val came back from dropping James off at some point during my rest and began helping Daniel prepare things. I tried to rest for probably 2 hours but the contractions were pretty regular, so after a while I had to find a new position because I was really uncomfortable. I went into the living room and alternated leaning over the birthing ball and the couch.

The midwives arrived while I was in the living room, I remember answering a call from Mary Anne (I don’t know why I answered the phone) and her asking to have one of our cars moved and I had a contraction and basically threw the phone. When they came in they used the Doppler and took heart tones for probably 10 mins, honestly throughout my entire labor the times they needed to use the Doppler were the most uncomfortable and frustrating for me. I remember asking her “when is this going to be over?” She thought I was talking about labor but I was just ready to not have the Doppler on me anymore, later on I remember looking at the other midwife taking the tones and saying “I REALLY HATE THIS!” they were so kind and gentle about the Doppler, I think it was just the only times during labor that I was kind of pulled out of my zone and focused on the contraction and not my breath.

When the midwives got to the house I think they sensed things were happening kind of quickly and they got Daniel and Val busy doing all the things to do to get ready. Daniel was in charge of filling up the birthing tub and Val was running around getting everything else ready. I was pretty oblivious to all this as I focused on each wave as they grew more and more intense.

As soon as the tub was almost full Mary Anne said I could get in and I remember being so relieved that I didn’t have to wait! I got in and felt some sweet sweet relief. The contractions were still tough but the water was sooooooo helpful. Val held one of my hands and Daniel held the other and a midwife would sometimes pour water on my back or hold my hand while Daniel was behind me and encouraged me. Things really started to heat up, I felt the waves getting stronger and more serious. Daniel answered a phone call from my mom and put her on speaker phone, the labor felt really really intense right then. My mom prayed for me and said the most encouraging beautiful words at the most perfect time. I wept and I think everyone in the room did too. It was exactly what I needed in that moment, to have that encouragement from my mom and then the release of a good cry.

After a while they asked me get out to pee and just as I was about to get out I got a big contraction and felt a wave of nausea. Val furiously scooted the garbage can over just as I started puking. (Val told me later that Holly, one of the midwives could sense I was going through transition and had literally just said to her “she’s going to vomit soon and went t find a proper bowl for me to throw up into) Then they had me go to the bathroom and tested my pee. They said my ketones were high and I was dehydrated, so Val handed me my water or a glass of orange “recharge” after every contraction and they fed me some of the date bar I had made. I remember Mary Anne being very adamant about getting food and drink in and saying if I didn’t get hydrated I would need an IV, which sounded terrible so I gulped and gulped and forced myself to eat the date bar that I did NOT want and some pieces of pineapple I think too.

They asked me if I was starting to feel pushy with my contractions and I said I thought so. They said I could try pushing if I felt like it with the next contraction. I was shocked at how hard it was to push. One of the midwives, Jessica asked if I felt any pinching or anything like that and I said I thought it might have been feeling some pinching. She asked if I wanted to be checked and I said yes. They hadn’t done any checks or anything aside from the Doppler up till now. She said I was 9.5cm with just a little cervical lip left. She said she could push the cervix out of the way with the next contraction if I wanted her to, and I said yes. So she did, that wasn’t really the most fun but it wasn’t as bad as I expected. I had been on my hands and knees a lot in the water and swinging my hips in a figure 8 motion. They said I needed to turn over onto my butt/back so baby wouldn’t push on my cervix anymore. I flipped over and with each contraction I planted my hands on the bottom of the pool and pushed my belly and butt up onto the air and breathed deeply, these were a new kind of contraction and I could tell we were getting close.

I remember vividly having one moment of frustration, I thought it still felt pinchy and gave myself over to worry for a moment that maybe I was pushing on my cervix and it was going to swell up. It felt like I was fighting my body for a moment like my whole pelvic floor was so tight. I said no no no way. But then with the next couple of contractions I felt the peace again and got back into my breath and breathed through the pushing and the burning. I’m pretty sure my eyes were closed for almost the entirety of my labor. The contractions started to slow down a little bit here giving me a bit of time in between them. I was still arching my whole torso and butt into the air with every wave.

Jessica asked if I wanted her to put pressure to direct where I needed to push with her fingers and I said yes. It was a pressure that I didn’t love but did feel helpful. She reached in and felt baby’s head and told me and I felt a rush of electricity. I knew I was about to meet my baby. That gave me a burst of energy that I channeled into the next push and his head moved down further. They put the Doppler on my belly again though this time I didn’t even notice. They said baby’s heart was dipping a little and wanted to give me some oxygen while I pushed. So they put the hose in my nose then the next wave came and I pushed with everything in me, there came his head with his hand held next to his cheek so sweetly.

The midwife said “push the rest of your baby out!”, and Daniel quickly moved from behind me to the other side of the birth pool and reached down into the water and pulled out our sweet boy and handed him to me.

He was born at 7:20am on 2/20/2020 and was 20” long, a little mystic for sure.

I said “oh my God! Oh my God oh my God we did it baby! We did it!”! The Daniel came back to my side and said, “is it a little boy?” I said “I think so, as I checked between his legs and confirmed, boy”

The midwives gave us warm towels to wrap baby in and we just stared at him. They asked if I wanted to stay in the tub to deliver my placenta or if I wanted to move to our bed, I said I didn’t care so we got ready to move to the bed but then I felt a pushy contraction and delivered the placenta in the birth tub.

Then we moved to our bed and the midwives palpated my belly which sounds like as much fun as it was. They checked to see if I tore and found one spot that was maybe tiny tear and we all debated if it was worth it to stitch it up or not. We decided not to. Then My friend Steff arrived with breakfast burritos that were the best thing I’ve ever eaten and the midwives gave her so much information and they weighed baby and measured him. 7lbs 6oz. And 20 inches long.

We all got to have a nap in our bed and it was quiet and calm and so peaceful.

The post What a Birth Date 2-20-2020!! first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

At 41.5 weeks pregnant I chose to use MaryAnne’s castor oil smoothie recipe to get labor moving. Mary Anne was on call and was vigilant in checking on me and my progress. I was having regular contractions by the late afternoon and felt bad asking MaryAnne to come because I didn’t think I was very far along, but MaryAnne listened to me go through a couple contractions over the phone and she said, “You’re farther along than you think you are. I’m coming over.” She got to the house and checked on me and I was so glad she was there because I was very much in labor and couldn’t move or talk during contractions. She and Josh (my husband) went to work with the birthing pool – Josh and I had already fixed the bed with the birthing sheets.

The rest of the team arrived about 6:00 and I was able to get in the pool. I melted as soon as I got in and felt so much relief. This was a really intense labor – I was more aware of my body in this labor than I was with any of the other labors. I could feel my body changing and after about two hours and 20 minutes, I felt things shift and felt like I needed to poop so bad. I even yelped out, “Oh no I’m pooping!” MaryAnne and Maggie all got down and checked but said, “Nope! No poop! You’re body is getting ready…not long now strong mama!” Hearing that was a breath of fresh air. I was ready. Josh wouldn’t leave my side except to get more liquids for me to drink, and if he was doing that, either MaryAnne, Maggie, or Jessica immediately took his place so I wasn’t alone. He and the midwives got along so incredibly well and they were so supportive of each other. MaryAnne was so calm. They all were. They let me do my thing but supported me in ways I didn’t realize I needed. MaryAnne was very strong, which I needed – “You got this Ashley! You’re doing it!” Maggie was soft spoken and prayed over me and rubbed my hands gently, which I needed. They all kept reminding me to take deep cleansing breaths after each contraction, keep my shoulders down and relaxed, and keep my hands and jaw relaxed. They were just amazing. Transition hit at 8:20 and for the next 25 minutes I pushed/breathed baby down. Josh was Hercules and was leaning over the edge of the pool to squeeze my hips. If he let go for even a second I let out a little whimper and said, “No! No! Go back!” It brought so much relief for him to squeeze my hips. Van’s head was born and I kind of just let my body do the rest – I gave one more half-hearted push and his body just slipped out. The greatest relief in the world. Literally.

They put him on my chest and I just laid my head back and closed my eyes. I looked at him for a little bit and took him in then closed my eyes and laid back. I just couldn’t keep my eyes open. He wiggled and started crying and turned his head and looked up at Josh and me. Sweet Josh was crying and kissing both of us. He was such a rock. I sat in the pool for a little bit and then they got me onto the bed and started trying to expel the placenta – it came out just fine…all intact. They said my placenta was absolutely beautiful and very robust – that made me happy. I created a good home for my baby. I just laid there with Van on my chest with my head back and eyes closed – it felt so good to finally be on my back just closing my eyes. I couldn’t believe it was done.

The midwives went around cleaning up and getting things organized again. I was so quiet Mary Anne finally said, “Ashley – you’re pretty quiet and you’re not smiling. Are you okay honey?” I told her I was great and was grinning on the inside – I was just so exhausted and relieved. Josh brought me some avocado toast and some of my healthy rice pudding to devour. I was so hungry. Then Van was ready to nurse and we started a beautiful nursing relationship right there. He figured it out so quickly. Nursing with Van has been the easiest of the four kids. They took Van to lay next to me for his check up and then we just sat and talked for a little bit. Josh and I thanked them for such a beautiful, perfect experience.

MaryAnne asked if they could leave us with a prayer and asked Josh if he would say it. Josh gave a beautiful prayer of gratitude for these amazing women – it was SUCH a perfect way to close such a sacred experience, and I’m so grateful to MaryAnne for suggesting it. We named my son after my brother who passed away two years ago, and I know my brother was there supporting me and making sure his little namesake made it earth side okay. It truly was an incredibly beautiful, sacred experience, and MaryAnne and her team helped me, and Josh, create that in more ways than one. If, IF, I get pregnant again, I hope it is while we are still living in Tennessee so I can use MaryAnne and her team again. Wouldn’t want anyone else helping me bring my babies into this world.

The post “An Incredibly Beautiful, Sacred Experience” first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

We lay in bed and I struggled to fall asleep for the first time. Felt my first REAL pressure wave at 10 p.m, immediately followed by a pop feeling. I got up to use the restroom and realized I had lost my plug, thus beginning the labor process. Contractions continued at 10 minutes apart for the rest of the night. I listened to my “easy first stage track” and slept through the night

July 30, Tuesday

Andrew got up and went to work at 4:15. I couldn’t go back to sleep so I got up and started working around the house. I prepared my home for the birth of our firstborn. Pressure waves were coming all day and progressed to every 8 minutes by early afternoon. When Andrew got home at 6, they immediately progressed to 5 minutes apart. We contacted Kate (best friend + photographer) to come out. My parents also came out to keep the mood light, and pray with us as we began our journey into parenthood. I eventually felt the need to rest so we laid down hoping to get sleep before they progressed. Pressure calmed down and went back to 10 minutes apart. I rested for several hours.

July 31, Wednesday

Andrew stayed home from work today. Kate, Andrew and I went to the river walk to try and get things going again. We walked for 30 minutes while I did squats, stairs and side lunges every 10. When we went home, Kate left, and I started a 90 minute stretch session called Miles circuit. I listened to my fear clearing track and slept while holding each position. For the last several hours of the day, the pressure waves varied between 4-8 minutes apart. I tried to stay awake but felt too tired to continue. Andrew and I laid down, hoping to get some rest before they progressed. Waves kept coming every 5 minutes. Andrew slept while I labored through the night.

August 1, Thursday morning

Got up at 7 to a text from Mary Anne asking me to call her. She asked how I felt. At this point, I was pretty discouraged because I felt I hadn’t progressed. She expressed concerns of exhaustion causing me to hemorrhage afterward or stall in the final stage and told me what options I would have if I hadn’t progressed. She offered to come and check me. I prayed as soon as we hung up to please be at LEAST 6 cm and that I will be able to continue at home. I called my mom for encouragement. She prayed over me as I cried. As Mary Anne made her way to our home, Andrew filled the birth pool for me to relax. It felt amazing. I continued to pray for progress and to be at peace with whatever outcome brought us our precious girl. When she arrived, around 9 a.m, I moved to the bed and she checked my progress. “Oh wow! You need to get back in that pool, you’re fully dilated. We might be helping this baby out on our own” she said. A HUGE wave of relief hit me and Andrew and I both became very excited. They quickly started to prepare the space as I relaxed in the birth tub, moving through pressure waves to help bring comfort. The birth assistants, Maggie and Jessica, arrived. Maggie put a port in my hand because I was at high risk for hemorrhage. Kate arrived right before I started pushing. Andrew stayed by my side the whole time. . Giving me water, popsicle and love with every gaze and touch. He helped me to feel relaxed and breathe through each surge. My midwives encouraged and kept me informed and COVERED in positivity and oils 

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Hannah was closer and closer with each surge! I continued to put all of my strength towards pushing, working to bring her down. I panted during the final stretch to ease her head into the world. Andrew switched with Mary Anne to catch our daughter and place her on my chest. One more push and into the world she came! Instant joy, overwhelming love, + gratitude for the process washed over my body. I hemorrhaged as I stood to move to the bed. The team quietly started giving me fluids in the port in my hand to stop the bleeding. They had it under control and allowed me to completely relax while I welcomed my precious babe. Hannah instantly latched to my breast and Andrew and I gazed at her in excitement and love. Kate captured every precious moment.

Hannah Belle Anne Smith She is a strong and joyful powerhouse. She will show grace and kindness to those who need it most. She is joy. She is grace. And she is ours

The post The Birth of Hannah Belle Anne first appeared on Tender Beginnings.

My friend told me about her water birth and she explained that Mary Anne was one of the most requested midwives in Nashville so if I wanted to have a home birth with her then I needed to call as soon as I found out I was pregnant! So I did exactly that! I called Mary Anne as soon as I found out I was pregnant – my parents didn’t even know yet! (My husband, Stephen, knew but we weren’t telling anyone yet).

Stephen was so supportive throughout the whole process and I didn’t even realize how much I would depend on him throughout labor! This was our first baby so neither one of us really knew what we were getting into!

When I first started having contractions it just felt like I needed to poop – which I did – three different times in the middle of the night. The fourth time I just sat on the toilet and then thought to myself “I must not need to poop” and as I stood up – my water broke! After that I started timing my contractions which were not painful at all at this point so I thought I had at least another day before Liam would be born but God had other plans!

I was so relieved when Mary Anne arrived – her calming yet assertive presence was very reassuring to this first time mom. I never felt like I was a patient the entire time that I was in labor. I just followed the lead of my body and Mary Anne kept on telling me that I was doing such a good job – those simple, positive words had a powerful affect on me!

When the contractions started getting a little more uncomfortable, I made a “nest” in the bathroom floor, covering it with layers of blankets and pillows so I could rest between contractions. I wasn’t sleeping at this point – just resting my eyes and my body. When a contraction would start, I would get on all fours and roll my belly on the birthing ball and this provided a lot of comfort.

Once the contractions started getting more intense I actually vomited three different times. I was trying to drink lots of water to compensate for that but that just made me have to pee all the time so I ended up just sitting on the toilet with my arms around Stephen’s neck while he sat across from me on the birthing ball. I actually think he might have used the birthing ball more than I did during labor!

It was so wonderful just to have him there supporting and encouraging me the entire time. If he had been the slightest bit worried or questioning I would have doubted my ability to have Liam at home. Just having him there for me to physically lean on (basically trying to pull his neck off) or to rub my back and squeeze my hips during contractions felt so good! For me – it was very strenuous for him. I actually told him at one point that he would be sure the next day! And he was!

I did not get into the birthing tub until I reached transition (so it wouldn’t slow my contractions) and once I stepped into the water it suddenly dawned on me that baby Liam was about to be born! It wasn’t just a dream anymore! At this point I not only had Stephen, but my mom in the birth room as well. We chose to set up the birthing tub in the baby’s room and it was perfect. It was big enough for everyone who was not in the tub to be able to walk around the room but it was very intimate and cozy.

I had created a playlist of worship songs on YouTube and we started playing it once I got into the birthing tub. It was amazing how many of the songs coincided with the moment! I did not hear the music most of the time because I was concentrating on remaining calm and diffusing the pain with techniques that I learned from Hypnobabies. But sometimes I would hear only one or two lines at just the right time. At one point, Stephen was pouring warm water over my back and I heard: “Oh your grace so free… washes over me…” the same song also says “life begins with you” and Mary Anne took a photo of the TV screen when that line played. I also remember hearing “I lift my eyes up to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord – the Maker of heaven and earth.” I don’t think that I have ever relied on God more than when I was in labor!

At first, I was not really pushing with the contractions – I was letting my body (and gravity) do the work on it’s own. But after almost and hour of sitting on my knees in the tub Mary Anne suggested that I try a squatting position. This helped so much and when he started crowning I got to reach into the water and feel his furry head and that is when I realized that this baby was coming out right now! It seemed very surreal until that moment. Then I knew that we were going to get to hold our baby in our arms in a few minutes. And after a few more minutes of pushing (and yelling) he was out!

I don’t even have words to describe the feeling of holding him on my chest for the first time.

We were still both in the warm water and I felt like Stephen, Liam, and I were the only three people in the whole world! Stephen actually got to “catch” the baby (which he describes as “fishing”) and hand him to me. I was so emotional I couldn’t even say anything except for “Liam” while patting his little fuzzy head. He was so snuggly and soft and sweet. I couldn’t believe that he came out of me – he looked so big! He was eight pounds which was such a surprise to me! I don’t know where he was hiding because my belly never really got very big! It was such a precious moment when Stephen cut the umbilical cord. I didn’t feel any pain at this point – I just kept getting wave after wave of joy and love. I have never felt anything so strongly and purely before. I am so thankful to be able to have this experience at home for my first baby! I wouldn’t want it any other way!

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