tenientemikepoetry.org

LOVE IS A PUZZLE

2011-11-25T11:26:00.000-08:00

I dreamt...

I said: Love is a puzzle!

She said: No, love is not a puzzle. It's simple!

I said: No, it's not simple. It's a puzzle.

She said: Why do you think that love is a puzzle?

I said: Because I can't figure it out.

She said: Good-bye!

I said: Don't go.

She said: I have to go now.

I said: Why?

She said: Because you need time to yourself to figure out your puzzle.

I said: The soul is far too complicated for simple solutions!

She said: I know you really feel that way; that's why I'm leaving now.

I said: What can I do to change your mind?

She said: Nothing! This time is over. This time has past.

I said: We'll never see it, again?

She said: Not with me you won't. Maybe with another, if you stop thinking so much and just accept life for what it is.

I said: What is the acceptance of life for what it is?

She said: I have to go now. Bye.

I said: Bye. Good luck. God Bless! -whispering to myself- I love you.

Then the dream disappeared, forever.
And it hurt to see the vision vaporized into thin air.

Awake, I thought to myself:
The day will come when I will write in the context of
the happiness of love
instead of these emotional disappointments.

Looking towards the Heavens...
I could feel the change in the air.
I must let it embrace me.
Without fight or anything to say.

Michael C. Teniente
November 25, 2011
Los Angeles, CA. 90004

THE TROUBLE IS, I KNOW WHY...

2011-11-23T00:15:00.000-08:00

If a man will not occupy himself with a task,
a life's task,
of course, he'll be depressed.

I know that.
I've known that for some time
and, yet, I fiddle with depression all the time.

Poetry really doesn't put an end to the depression.
It's a substitute for something else that I must do.

I take months off from writing...
It never fails!
Only when the depression kicks in
then, and only then, do I write the commandments.

Jesus is my savior.
He made me a writer.
I have no other salvation.

LOL!

Everything else is a pretense of life for me.
My task is to write what I've been given
and if I don't
the trouble is, depression;
and I know why.

Don't cry for me.
I'll get up, again -I've done it a thousand times-.
And I'll learn to focus -I do it now and then-.
on my life's task.

I'm just an undisciplined fool.

Right now, I'm depressed -My folly bites-.
I can feel it in my heart.
But, I also know how to fight it.
Find a task!
A meaningful task.
Or find myself a woman
and make her miserable.

I don't want to cheat her out of a happy life
just to avoid my spiritual responsibilities.

I need a help-mate.
The trouble is:
who's gonna believe what I have on my hands?
How do I share what I have with someone I'm interested in?
God needs to do his part, too.

By: Michael C. Teniente
November 23, 2011
Los Angeles, CA. 90004

LOVE re-visitied:

2011-11-22T07:48:00.001-08:00

Love,
to me, only to me,
strictly to me,
is a theory, an idea,
that I wanted so badly
that I convinced myself that I was in love
with a girl that represented that idea
in my head.

I don't blame myself
because I want to love,
and to be loved.

I just don't want the emotional mixture
that comes along with it.
I want peaceful love,
quiet love,
joyful love.
Passionate love?
Passionate yes,
volatile love...no!
I don't think so.

Damn, just the idea of holding hands
with someone that I'm attracted to;
that's all I really wanted to do.
It was only an idea.
A painful idea because she said no.

Allowing my mind to float, now,
I have to ask myself:
Are you happy?

That's my love's eternal question,
always...
Are you happy?

Everyday, in the morning,
wouldn't I have asked you:
Are you happy?

And if you would have said no,
wouldn't I have asked:
what can I do to make you happy?
It's a peaceful, idealistic, theory.
Are you happy?
I want to be happy, too.

God, where is my happiness?
I guess, if I smiled more
it would help.
I'm really not a bad guy,
but, I guess, no one really knows that.
I really should smile more.

Ask me, now:
Are you happy?
And I will answer truthfully.
To be by myself?
Not really.
But, I'm not depressed, either.
But, I think I could cry.
Yes, let me cry for a little while.
Because it is painful.

OK, that was short but thunderous!
I had to do it.
OK, now let me dry these tears from my eyes.
Let me breathe a little easier.

Now, let me ask:
God, Jesus,
am I not your child?

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find;
knock and the door will be opened to you.
For everyone who asks receives;
he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks,
the door will be opened."

Father, God, Jesus...
Please,
I'm asking for my happiness
manifested in my theory of love.

I want to be happy, too.
I don't want to cry, anymore.
Won't you save me from this painful heart?

Who'll ask me...
If I'm happy?

Damn, just the idea of holding hands
with someone that I'm attracted to;
that's all I really want to do.
It's only an idea;
hopefully, a happy idea.

By: Michael C. Teniente
November 22, 2011
Los Angeles, California 90004

Where Art Thou, Mine Fairest Beloved

2011-02-13T23:08:00.000-08:00

O' thou wile-est Cupid

how is it that thou hast fastened thine attention

upon the arrow,

it seems, that thou whittle out from

the stem of a rose red flower?

Aimed from thine o' so mysterious dwelling,

targeting mine heart,

to pierce mine very own soul.

Falling, in obeisance,

wherein is all for me but to

close mine eyes

envisioning the grace of which is the throne of Heaven,

from whence I shouldest submit in supplication

but for a path, should it be difficult or nay,
to follow,

wherein I shouldest encounter

mine own heart’s one desire;

victim of that o' thou wile-est Cupid

and the bow.

Opening mine eyes,

to mine feet arise,

humbly dignified by Heaven’s grace,

looking to the ground; what is this

that I shouldest cast mine eyes upon?

Couldeth it be?

A bestowed upon petals rose red trail,

which I shouldest travel, with mine companion faith,

that it shouldest lead to the heart

of mine fairest beloved.

Where art thou, mine fairest beloved?

WORDS ARE A DIME A DOZEN

2011-01-30T02:45:00.000-08:00

Because, all I really want to say
is that I love you.

To Be Continued!

2009-07-06T02:30:00.000-07:00

O' thou paradigm;
what is it that compellest thee,
that thou should seek to speak
in vanity?

Far be it from my soul
that I should adhere to such an urge.

© Michael C. Teniente July 4, 2009. Los Angeles, CA.

TENIENTE...isms

2009-03-22T00:00:00.000-07:00

It’s deep into the night
And I really don’t feel bad at all.
I’m not drunk, high
Or anything else and
I’m alone.

There is no drama
In my soul…
That means I’m feeling content.
I’m at peace,
While I’m all alone.

I want to keep it that way.
To be at peace, I mean,
not to be all alone.
I wonder if that’s something that I can really control
being constantly at peace with myself
Or if the right string is pulled
I’ll tumble into a theatrical drama,
performed by me.

Why does the soul have to suffer
to write interesting poetry?
The world is wrong!
The world is wrong!
Didn't you hear me ring the bell?

There is no more fight
for me to engage along my journey.
There is only peace.
It will have to suffice.
Such a strange thing to experience,
this feeling of peace,
after all these years of tears.

After all these years of seeking “truth”
my reward is peace?
I could have had that a long time ago,
in the arms of a beautiful woman.
The only “truth” that truly matters
is to be loved.

She has passed me by…
and all I have left
is acceptance.

That is the truth!
That is the hardest "truth"
I've ever had to accept.

© Michael C. Teniente March 22, 2009 12:00 a.m. Los Angeles CA.

TALKING TO JESUS II

2009-03-16T23:12:00.000-07:00

Wait?
I am waiting
to hear,
understand
the sound
of the voice,
of your spirit in my life?

When I do
hear
and understand
it,
I’ll respond
so that the day will come
that I can hear it, again
and again.
It’s what I live for.

Take my ear,
and cause it to hear.
Take my heart,
and cause me to obey,
even unto death.
Take my mind
and cause me to visualize
your will,
your will
in my life.

Take my life
and cause me to praise
your holy name.
As I do
wait…
on thee.

© Michael C. Teniente 1997. California Department of Corrections-New Soledad

IS THIS STUFF REAL?

2009-03-16T23:10:00.000-07:00

Tell me
who cares
anymore?
If you are
or aren’t there anymore.
Because all we can believe
is in that which we can see.

Tell me
who cares
anymore?
If you are
or aren’t there anymore.
Its all about the sense of a touch
which stimulates us
so very much.
Is it because we or I
lack understanding?
Or is it because;
until I die and go to heaven
I have to learn to live
with my physical and mental
shortcomings,
while my soul and spirit
long,
in this present day,
to please you...

Such is my self imposed confliction.

© Michael C. Teniente 1995. California Department of Corrections-Corcoran

TALKING TO JESUS!

2009-03-16T23:07:00.000-07:00

Where art thou?
Thou, whom my soul loveth.
Passing nights
quench not
this desire
of my longing soul
to see thee
face to face.

Beyond my reasoning
are my affections
towards thee
with the only certainties
of this-these
dramas
are the sureties
of the existence
of my need to see thee
face to face.

Where art thou?
Thou, whom my soul loveth.

Here am I,
beckons
the Spirit.

© Michael C. Teniente 1997. California Department of Corrections: Chino-East

THE TWO SIDES OF A COIN (1982)

2009-03-16T22:47:00.000-07:00

‘A’

The world so tough.
The world so cold.
Just twenty-three years
but I feel so old.
I feel so bad.
I feel so blue.
I hate this world.
I really do.
I really don’t want
I don’t want any part
‘cause all it does
is hurt my heart.
I wish I could die.
I sometimes do.
But I know that’s just…
not the thing to do.
Forgive me dear Lord,
for feeling this way.
But it’s the truth.
What can I say?

‘B’

No more party.
And no more hate.
Just wait for my Lord…
to open his gate.
No more lies.
And no more pride.
Time to show some love
and think why my Lord died.
No more memories…
of what life has been.
I just have to stop
thinking of all that sin.
Time to serve the Lord
and with a joyful heart.
Like it should have been
from the very start.
Time for me to start
to praise the Lord.
For unto this old sinner
was his grace poured.

© Michael C. Teniente 1982. Blythe California

BEAUTIFUL WOMAN III

2009-03-12T12:08:00.000-07:00

He closes his eyes...
and he dreams of her,
because his conscience demands
that he should always have the hope
for love.

He awakens...
and his heart is beating passionately
as he whispers her name into the empty air.

He closes his eyes...
and he dreams of her, again,
because his conscience demands
that he should believe.

He is designed fragile towards the woman that he truely loves...
but his conscience is structured powerful.

He awakens...
and his heart is beating passionately
as whispers her name, again,
while he ponders the concept of his daily destiny.

Beautiful woman,
Tell me,
just what is it
that you think you need to prove?
And is it to yourself,
to me,
or to your friends and relations?

Tell me,
how would it make you feel
to know,
if you wanted me to,
that I would literally
crawl
to you? (Undignified man that I am towards you.)

And how would it make you feel
to know
that you have the ability
to make me
cry? (Fragile man that I am towards you.)

Simply put,
you hurt me.
Which tells me that
I
am
alive,
and twisting in the fluids of the human condition.
(Who doesn't need to be loved?)

I'm thinking that you might have the ability
to make me smile, too. (Quenching the fire that I breathe.)

I want to smile and to jump for joy.

I guess, if I have to, I can find a way to smile
without you.
But it would be a forced and empty smile
that I would impose upon the world.
And I, certainly, would not jump for joy
or anything else,
and I would continue to breathe fire.

Is this the appropriate condition
that a man must experience,
when he is being denied the company
of the woman that he dreams of?

© Michael C. Teniente. 2004 Los Angeles, CA.

BEAUTIFUL WOMAN II

2009-03-12T12:03:00.000-07:00

Beautiful woman,
do you not
stir
my heart to beat
with a passion
unresolved? (I have to do something about it)

Isn’t it
my secret wish,
my wildest dream
to casually run into you?

Hey!
Just passing by
just
so that I can see you.

Meeting
eye to eye
smiling
just
to tell you
Hi!

Does she smile?
She who makes
my heart
beat
with a passion
so unresolved. (it hurts!)

O my Father
God!
She makes me
…feel
like
coming down to earth (off my lonely mountain)
just
so that I can have a chance
to hold her hand
she makes me
…feel
so alive.

© Michael C. Teniente. 2004 Los Angeles, CA.

BEAUTIFUL WOMAN

2009-03-12T11:39:00.000-07:00

Beautiful woman,
I have a Christian
crush
on you.

It’s simple.
It’s pure.
It’s true.
But still
here I stand, after all these years,
feeling
unsure
about you.
What you might be thinking
feeling,
if anything.

Is there anything,
a flicker of hope,
to explore?
And what are the do’s and don’ts
of what I must do.
Even if it’s an absolute
impossibility,
in your mind,
that we could somehow share
a moment or two
of peaceful bliss
or maybe be involved in
a chaotic fusion
that would eventually be the makings of
the moments that would cause us to reminisce.

All I can really say to that is
hey…
it’s cool. (It's the only way I can play it...it isn't cool.)
You’ve got to do
what you must do.
Just let it be known
That on this day
I did say
That I have a Christian
crush
on you.

© Michael C. Teniente. 2003 Los Angeles, CA.

THE LOOSE CHANGE OF MY THOUGHTS

2009-02-09T21:57:00.000-08:00

I am,
a true conservative.
Although, my face may not be white;
a true philosophy has no face.

I do believe in morals absolute,
tied to a feeling of peace;
for my actions,
which is my reward.

Ideas, beliefs and convictions
fighting against the wind,
of modern practical thinking,
it’s like a backward theory, I know,
fighting to take a step forward
in this evolutionary state of mind.

I sometimes wonder
just want is missing,
in this conservative philosophy.
Is it a true definition,
lost, somewhere, in the sea of hypocrisy?

The foundation of a nation
is being shaken
for the sake of a philosophy
that has no true face.

You're age is showing,
beyond your years.
Years of spiritual hard living will do that to any
idea
that isn’t true to itself.

Hypocrisy and Idolatry are an offense
to the ever increasing -
educated - uneducated -
common man.

But, still, don't think that I want
someone - else
to do me any liberal favors,
please!

I am a man
who has two feet,
and I don’t need or want your help
to stand upon the ideas, beliefs and convictions
that I find and believe to be true.
Despite the direction that the winds,
of modern practical thinking,
seem to be blowing.

© February 09, 2009 Michael C. Teniente: Los Angeles, CA.

FLEE IN A WISH

2009-01-02T19:13:00.000-08:00

I wish I were a simple minded
fool.
That way I could just accept things
for the way they seem to be.

I wish I were a snow flake
that somehow, without melting,
drifted, drifted and drifted into the sea.
That way I could be one thing one moment,
and another thing the next.
It's called the great escape.

I wish I had her here with me,
that way I wouldn't have to wish...
anymore.

Isn't it funny how she
has the ability to twist my soul?

p.s. I don't like it.

© January 02, 2009 Michael C. Teniente: Los Angeles, California

IN THE BEGINNING...

2008-11-16T22:29:00.000-08:00

I’m on a path,
a journey,
looking for the meaning of life,
only to find myself looking
into a mirror.

And the refection I saw,
in my eyes,
was far from satisfying,
so I projected it on you,
my dear.

I guess it's how I deal with pain.

Moving forward...

And when I try to conceptualize
the voice of God in my life;
I’d have to say that it’s not
as prestigious as that.
It has more to do with the structure of my soul
or so my conscience said
something like that,
or maybe it's something like this:

In the beginning,
God created Heaven and Earth
and I, graciously,
received my birth.

But the Earth was without form
and, so, I travailed,
what I thought to myself,
as a worthless worm.

But God said: “Let there be light!”
And, so, now I stand
somewhat dignified. (I want to learn how not to hurt you.)
But I still don’t know,
I just don’t know
how to communicate these thoughts to you personally,
without losing you
to the fancy and powerful roar…
of the seas.

© 2004 Michael C. Teniente: Los Angeles, California

THE OPTIMIST

2008-11-16T22:09:00.000-08:00

I.

Wishful thinking…
I think that
a poem of love
should be recited
daily,
so that the depth of understanding
may prevail
against that maddening adversary
who toils
daily,
for acceptance.
I
AM
a shade of
amatory!

II.

And rainbows
represent
the beauty of
…diversity.
I
AM
comprehension!

III.

And schools of thought
are out to teach
that the wind and man-kind
are out in search
of inspiration.
Inspiration, I say!
A notch above yesterday's
conquest.
I
AM
innovation!

IV.

And sunsets represent
the coming of
a new era.
I
AM
benevolence!

V.

And so I say…
that a poem of understanding
should be recited
daily,
so that the depths of love
may prevail
against the maddening adversary
who toils
daily,
for acceptance
against
wishful thinkers.
I
AM
Utopia!

© 1995 Michael C. Teniente: Corcoran State Prison

THE HARDCORE (1984)

2008-11-16T21:57:00.000-08:00

Sometimes this life
isn’t all you hope.
Sometimes it’s hard
for you to cope.

So don’t push your life
into my world.
Because you don’t understand
the circumstances
of where I stand.

And when I come
it’s only to share a moment.
But you turn the table
and make me your opponent.

Just to add a line
to your witty witty conversation.
And when you turn your back
you leave a cold vibration.

So you wonder if?
And who you are.
But you play it like
you’re a fallen star.

But don’t you worry
about any old thing
because your just a puppet
controlled by string.

And when it pulls
to speak of me,
is it really me
that you think you see?

Because time does start
when you open your eyes,
and all you know
is what your mind thinks of.

So, have you ever been to the moon?
Or into the land of Egypt?
Well it’s a short trip
that will end soon.

So, you get on the nightrain.
You hear the thunder
of a bird.
You the commotion of
a blackball bust.

It doesn’t really matter
what cards you deal.
But when you lay them down
make sure that you’re for real.

Hey, I’ve never said
that you weren’t right.
But I never said
that I was wrong.

And when you hear the words
to this song.
You’ll probably wonder
was it an answer or a question
that I failed to mention.

Then a midst came down.

Hey, sometimes its you.
Sometimes it me.

So,
it has been said.

p.s. This poem was written upon request by a house full of heroin addicts. I had just written Another Time, Another Zone and I recited it to them. Then they said: Write a poem about us. So, I wrote the Hardcore.

© 1984 Michael C. Teniente: San Jacinto, California.

BETHEL (THE HOUSE OF GOD)

2008-11-13T23:04:00.000-08:00

Two souls
reaching out…
connected,
under the happened stance
of a galaxy’s fixed equation.

Memorize it.
Repeat it.
For soon you’re bound to need it.
When paths cross
and possibilities
collide
wheresoever they might meet,
under the influence
of a galaxy’s fixed equation.

PROCEED WITH CAUTION!

Potentially,
highly explosive
are the works
that do ignite
a fires light,
under the determination
of a galaxy’s fixed equation.

One heart
steadily beats…
under the roof
of collected
and connected souls.
The wind blows
and spirits flow
to wheresoever they must go,
under the blessing
of a galaxy’s fixed equation.

Etched in the blood
of our destined road.
And this is nothing more
than an experience…
…gone by.

p.s. So don't you mess with me!

© 1996 Michael C. Teniente: Chino, CA. Chino-East

THE MARRIAGE POEM

2008-11-13T22:55:00.000-08:00

Love is a commitment
sealed
by the bond of trust.

Trust is the silent action,
which brings peace
to those who share it.

A tornado cometh
twisting and turning
and always learning
about each others comforts,
needs,
and even wants.
And finally coming to the realization
that what we see
in each others eyes
is all we have.
The trust of a commitment
sealed
by the bond of love.

Love is a blessing.

Sweetly given
is the command,
when male and female,
walking hand in hand,
finally
becoming one,
called…
to be a man.

CHILD CARE FROM CONCEPTION

2008-11-13T22:44:00.000-08:00

Without a face.
Without a body...
I AM frail.

I AM
an active energy.
I AM
ready to absorb.

I hear the sound of your voice.
It touches me to the core.
Your words embrace me!
Your thoughts are invested
into my being.

I AM
fitted.
I AM
ready.

With a body.
With a face.
As a human being
I AM
MIGHTY!
I AM
Alive.
I AM
ready.

Simply,
to be loved.

WATER

2008-11-13T22:38:00.000-08:00

Ocean.
River.
Lake.
Spring.
Love!
Life.
Thirst!

Refresh…
…I pray,
my soul,
with a small drink
from thy well.
Thy sweet…
…sweet smelling
well.
I faint!

Refresh…
my soul.
So that I may live,
once again,
when I taste of…
thy sweet,
sweet smelling…
well

O
life
giving
well.

My Confession in Faith

2008-04-25T21:42:00.000-07:00

Yes,
it’s true,
I do confess
that I am weak.

I’ve been awakened
from a deep slumber
and I’ve been dressed
in this attire
of human frailty.

This flesh and bone.
This river of blood.
This canvass of dust.
Gathered together unto one place
and called
Earth.

Yes,
it’s me
and I think I see
that the universe is one,
disconnected
by human perception,
perceptions.
Yet, still,
it absorbs
this mindless abuse
for it,
in and of itself,
will have the final say.
When
all is said and done,
and can be done,
in and of ourselves.

Then we can look
to the shining Son
and ask
to be re-graffed
into the ordinances
of the universe
to again,
be as one.

O' it’s coming
that radical change,
that paradigm
…shift!
By commandment
from up on high.
I said…
O' Paradigm:
You shall surely shift!
And then
this materialistic
illusion
will be put into its place.
Not completely destroyed,
mind you,
but its relevance will be reduced
to that as of a humorous
tale
that existed
once
a long time ago.
When
and where
the memories of our shame
burdened,
blinded our need
to seek
and be at peace
with truth!
Hard truth!
Compassionate truth!
Healing truth!
Embracing me in
this my weakness.
This attire
of human frailty!

© 2004 Michael C. Teniente in Los Angeles, CA.

No Mirages to Sell!

2008-04-24T03:44:00.001-07:00

Within my soul
I have no mirages to sell.
Because on the day that you left,
you left me standing alone.
I said, on the day that you left,
it was just me and my soul.

And so I say:
within my soul
I have no mirages to sell.
Where there was once brightness,
I’m now standing in the dark.
Where there was once was hopeful existence,
I’m now standing in distress.

And so,
within my soul
I have no mirages to sell.
Where I once had flowers to pick,
I’ve only the dust to kick.
Where I once had love to share,
it’s now just me and despair.

Oh!..
Within my soul
I have no mirages to sell.
Where I once had I all
within the structure of my plan.
I now have the air...
Good God I, I, I just don’t understand.
That within my soul
I have no mirages to sell.

p.s. This is my Terence Trent D'Arby influenced poem. Not the lyrics but how it I see it being performed on stage. It has TTD written all over it. LOL! Here's to you Sananda Maitreya! Long live the Spirit!

© 1992 Michael C. Teniente, California Department of Corrections: Folsom Prison