The 30 Minute Gamer

Flash Game Review: Learn to Fly

2010-08-26T01:32:00.000-04:00

PENGUINS!!! That's right, in today's flash game review we take a brief look at a game called Learn to Fly. this game involves a bit of control, some timing, and a touch of intelligence... the perfect combination in my book.

The game, hosted on Kongregate, puts you in charge of a penguin who is trying to learn to fly I suppose... really the game plot is just a hilarious excuse to have a penguin with a glider and rockets strapped to it's back traveling at hundreds of miles per hour through the air. However, even with this fault, which makes no sense at all, the game still manages to entertain greatly... in fact it might top the charts with how hilarious it is to watch and play.

So the basic premise is you have a penguin traveling down a ramp of a given height, and once he reaches the bottom he will fly out into the sky and attempt certain goals. Goals correspond to the given level, so maybe it is a certain number of feet you must reach, or a speed or a height. Whatever the goal, each of the four stages has one.

Controls are fairly basic, once the penguin is in the air you use your controls to modify it's flight path, and the space bar triggers the rocket that might be strapped to it. The point in varying it's flight path is since once it hits the water it can bounce... it reminded of me and hitting the water with a skipping stone, the flatter the stone the better the bounce.

Items can be purchase at the store, with cash gained through achievements and how well you preformed during each jump. You can buy upgrades relating to lowering air resistance, or increasing rocket fuel and everything in between. And I mean the game, while not that hard is still fairly entertaining. Like tyhe penguin is hilarious to watch go off the ramp.

The goal in the game is of course to reach 6,000 feet traveled. This is most easily accomplished by just upgrading the hell out of everything that you have available, and then learning how to use your rockets. Since the game gives you a huge amount of data once you have an upgraded glider, try and minimize your wind resistance, while maximizing speed and elevation. If you do these few things your penguin will certainly learn to fly.

Again, this game isn't meant as a challenge, it shouldn't be hard, and won't take you three days. The graphics sounds and premise of a penguin who just wants to learn to fly will touch your heart... and well... hell just go out do what I say and play the game, it's fun you'll like it and enjoy wasting some time on it.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.0/5

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Flash Game Review: Achievement Unlocked 2

2010-08-25T01:02:00.001-04:00

The thrilling, and long awaited sequel, Achievement Unlocked 2 really does build on where the first game left off. With 250 achievements to unlock, you can spend hours and hours... and hours on it. Well, if you suck, it only took me 45 minutes.

Found on Kongregate, this little gem really is absolutely hilarious to play, the point of it is to satire and poke fun at other flash games. and games in general which give achievements for no real reason. This review covers some of the comical action of the tiny elephant, and will touch on a few of the more obscure achievements... and yes I really did the entire game in 45 minutes, but I mean hey... I'm amazing so whatever.

So to start, when the game first loads up you unlock about a dozen achievements instantly. and a bunch more are unlocked from not even moving... which is also one, not moving that is. The elephant is controlled via the arrow keys... or for another achievement use WADS. Of course tho, several tasks present themselves on your quest to unlock achievements, including running in your wheel, drinking some water, filling the levels and collecting coins. Coins are placed sporadically throughout each level, and as we all know when there are coins, you must collect them at all costs. However, instead of being highly visible, they are incredibly tough to see which forces you to really run EVERYWHERE in the levels.

Speaking of levels, more are purchased through the in-game store, don't worry to much about the cost as it is rolled into the coins you pickup in the game. In fact buying levels is quite humorous, as the game doesn't take itself very seriously and so includes several comments from random sources which are all false. As you purchase levels, go and collect coins to buy more until you get to the roof... and the manor in which you travel is quite unique.

You see, Achievement Unlocked 2 makes great use of launchers that move the elephant up and down, these may defy the laws of gravity, but they are essential to moving around. You do jump quite high, but not high enough... it's never high enough is it now? Also there are horrible stalagmites that kill you in various ways, and platforms that teleport you all around. There is a slot machine, and a full octave worth of keys on a piano... and that is just to start.

This game has a massive amount of content considering that the time trial mode only allows for the first four minutes of game play. Seeing the nonstop flood of unlocking things is quite rewarding, but at some of them you feel rather silly. This feeling only goes towards the real message of the game which is to make fun and laugh at games that do this in a much more serious fashion.

CONGRATULATIONS, YOU KILLED YOUR FIRST ENEMY!

How many of us have played a stupid flash game, or console game that spits this message out, and we think to ourselves... my god was I supposed to be glad for that waste of a message... it reminds me of WoW.

The sounds work nicely for the game, there is a handy mute button, but no volume control, it doesn't really interfere with the game seeing as I liked the music. In 30 minutes I did get a good portion of the entire game done, but of course that is the easy part. I would recommend this to everyone, I mean it isn't a huge game, it won't make you want to play it for hours but it is definitely hilarious.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.6/5

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Flash Game Review: Sonny

2010-08-23T23:09:00.000-04:00

Good flash game RPGs are few and far between, so when you stumble across a really good one, you simply have to share it with the world, no matter how much it has already been played. Sonny on Kongregate, has been a favorite for a few years now, and I have played it before, so I thought it was time for it's own flash game review.

A lot can be said about Sonny, it has a ton of things to offer, I mean it has a reasonable amount of length, and multiple characters to control. The graphics are fairly sharp, and the sound effects fit right into the game environment. However that are a few features that get me hung up on, and some areas that definitely could be improved. Now, don't get this game confused with the Mardek RPG style of game play. It doesn't make you walk around and discover things and have random encounters or any of that fun stuff. Sonny is a much more straight forward game that relies more on combat, and thinking and planning. However because this game does include a leveling system, multiple types of characters, and items to buy and sell it really does belong as an RPG.

The game begins with a few questions, whats your name and what type of zombie do you want to be (yes you get to be a zombie). It then puts you directly into combat fighting along side someone, but don't worry this part of the game is very simple. Actually the entire game is fairly easy, with only a few fights being difficult, but more on that later. So as you finish the fight, lots of plot details unfold, you don't seem to remember much and all you know is fighting. Actually, the real game is in the plot, the actual game itself is fairly easy.

Essentially, you can chose between 4 main classes, each being based on a certain combat style. I had chosen the assassin type, which basically just does absurdly high burst damage. After each battle, you can find items, get gold, and earn experience. Also, you are encouraged to pickup each and every item as these are used in the future either to sell or to give to other party members. The game does a fairly good job at explaining how combat works, so I won't go to far in-depth. Essentially, you have a combat bar that is in the form of a circle, and you add abilities to it prior to combat. These abilities can have several different ways to be used but the most common cost is focus. Focus normally starts at 100, and is reduced with most abilities. It does not have a natural regeneration rate during combat, but other abilities will boost it, and after combat it does get reset.

The game lets you do a lot of customization when it comes to your abilities, and what you want to do. Each time you gain a level you get an ability point, as well as an attribute point. These points are spent that will let you define how your character will function as well as unlock and give access to new techniques.

The game is played out in 4 zones, 3 of which make up the main game content, and a 4th that is open ended and meant only for the baring brave... and those with to much time on their hands. The first 3 are all basically the same, they are viewed on a screen and have 3 rotating... circles or something. Each circle allows access to either a practice fight for experience and gold, a story fight which advances the game, and the item store to shop around.

Zones are completed after enough story advancing encounters, however you will find yourself needing to do some of the training ones simply to gian some levels. While this might seem like a time waste, it isn't. Should you die, you will simply see a small sign, and restart from a previous save point. Normally the auto save feature will take care of everything quite nicely.

This game really gets hung up on the fact that no other party member is controllable other than Sonny. If you want to throw him a heal, you can't. If you want to give him a buff, you can't. If you want to do anything, yeah you guess it, you can't. That really pissed me off the entire time, I mean what is the sense in having all of these wonderful characters if they are set on autopilot.

However, despite that flaw, this game still manages to keep me entertained and have reply value. It shouldn't take more than 30 minutes to get through the initial game, especially if you hit space and skip the plot details. After that the value would be in trying another class, not in grinding in that 4th zone endlessly, that is just a giant waste of time.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.4/5

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Flash Game Review: Toss The Turtle

2010-08-20T21:35:00.000-04:00

TOSS THE TURTLE! Well, 'toss' is not a very accurate word, fire out of a grotesquely large cannon would probably be better. This game promises to entertain you in many graphically filled ways...

Found on Kongregate, this game really does push the bounds of this genre, there are a plethora of flash games out there that involve launching something out of something trying to get the max distance... this one does it very well. The little things in this game make it good, like the turtles hilarious faces as he plummets against the ground, the awards for getting impaled on spikes, and hitting goombas. The music fits the game well, and the sounds are hilarious and don't get overly annoying after 20 or 30 shots, however bot are easy to disable if you want to.

The goal of the game is to buy everything at the shop, and shoot the turtle as far as possible... well at least that is about the only thing I can get from it. You complete this task by upgrading between rounds and then during the main game, once you have fired, controlling the little shelled friend as he travels through the air is done with the WADS keys. Actually, the first thing I noticed when I hit play on this title is the way the tutorial is designed, it isn't interactive, or long or anything, two simple pictures explain the entire game, brevity is wonderful.

So, that being said this game obviously doesn't have a difficulty factor, the longer you play the more money you get the better the items and farther your launch. It is a pretty simple system that ensures people will want to keep playing to get everything, but I mean it really is THAT simple. I did enjoy tho the variety of stuff that is created and ends up in your way. Early on you will find yourself controlling your flight to try and hit certain objects that propel you farther and farther, lots of good fun.

Many different types of upgrades are available including better weapons and high powered jet packs... even mini nukes can be purchased to propel the turtle sky-high and over incredible distances. The variety of upgrades is appreciated, however once you get the golden gun with it's golden bullets, everything else seems kinda stupid. This gun will instantly, and with only a single bullet, shoot the turtle that max horizontal speed, and massive vertical gain. It kinda solves the game, and allows you to clear 3,000,000 million feet without any problems at all.

The extraneous features such as medals and things on the screen as you fly do actually add to the game. In order to pass the 3 million milestone you really need to play for a long time and accumulate those medals. They give bonuses to certain features and parts of the game, and are next to essential to get. However the problem is that they are purely random, as almost all of them involve what things you land on or hit, and since that has no guarantee... well I am sure you can see the point. This game while entertaining and fun, and graphically pleasing... just doesn't have any sort of difficulty associated with it.

And that's perfectly acceptable as overall, this game, isn't supposed to be a challenge, it is an exercise in repeated aggression against small shelled animals. This game does preform like you want it to, short fast and to the point. It is the way we want it to be, and does what it promises, and that promise is entertainment for about an hour. I would definitely recommend this flash game, but then I'd say to quit whenever you get bored.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.4/5

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Flash Game Review: The Company of Myself

2010-08-18T10:13:00.000-04:00

An eerie title that was produced in 2009, this game really does take on a mind of it's own. The Company of Myself is on of those games on Kongregate that you don't even notice you are playing until you get stuck, it's fluid filled with story and awesome...

First, to be frank, this game is shockingly fun, simple in nature, and devilishly complex. If you manage to wrap your mind around the concepts that it relies on, and the nature of the game, you will find it hauntingly beautiful, and irresistible to finish it. You traverse 20 levels as the sole character, at least for most of it. You don't seek the attention of others, nor their companionship, and you don't need it either. With the ability to help yourself in interesting ways, you manage to make due and complete the tasks required.

Ok Ok Ok I'll avoid the cryptic talk, you navigate progressively more difficult puzzles in an ever infuriating attempt to get to a green door. Upon reaching said green door, you press the space bar and poof you beat the level...

That's where the normal part ends and the plot picks up... you see the character you control use to have a love named Katelyn who he murdered... and well it gets even more complex, but lets just say you need to finish the game to get the amazing detail. Not only is the plot complex, but game play revolves around a style that is virtually 100% unique to this game. You see, when you press the space bar and you are NOT on a green door you die, and are reborn in a new life. At that point when you spawn, your copy and ever other copy you have created that level will play out its life in perfect replica and stop moving at the final position. It will trigger any leavers, cross any boundaries, and complete any tasks it was previously assigned.

This feature is so unique and incomprehensible that the first level where you actually need to use it could take you a few extra minutes... When you spawn as the version you are controlling that life, you can interact with the previous copies of yourself, and they can also interact with you. You can stand on their heads, they can stand on yours, and you can also jump off of them. These fundamental principles of the game essentially define it to be what it is. There are a variety of combinations with this principle that make the game complex, and the fact that you can do so many different things.

In addition to having many different iterations of yourself to use to complete goals, there are certain force fields which add more and more depth to the game. You see, pink force fields, only your previous copies can walk or run on, and green force fields on your actual self can walk on. This means that it can be required to imagine how your character might behave and preform that action, even tho you are actually seeing it happen. This leads to mind bending scenarios where you have to pretend you are jumping up stairs, or running even tho you are up against a wall.

This game also stretches your imagination for what is possible with clones... it might be required on some levels to stack them on top of each other and then run across something with the stack on your head. Other possibilities involved you standing on the copies head while you stand still... a lot of things happen.

I normally don't give hints, but the last level drove me almost to using a hint guide, so the trick is... remember that you have an unlimited number, and that you can jump off their heads.. in mid air.

But the real point to this game is the plot and overall, even with the amazing engine, that is still the best part. As an aside, the sound can be disabled by using "p" to pause and adjust, but you will see it really suits the game. Back to the plot, it really does make the game, the intriguing ideas it puts forth, and when you finish, to see the actual message... You should beat this game, go out and do it now.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.5/5

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Flash Game Review: Epic Coaster

2010-08-17T11:43:00.002-04:00

Another one of those trippy, music repeats, everything flashes, and the points go up way to fast games, Epic Coaster on Kongregate has just in along with the recent influx of games that serve up psychedelic graphics and sounds to match... but is it any good.

Well I mean it is difficult to say if the game is actually any good, but it isn't really all that bad. I mean compared to our favorite game of this genre, Robot Unicorn Attack, it is a little bit simpler, and there is a little bit less flash, and the music isn't as good... but that's a good thing. This game is very low key when it comes to this type, you only get 1 life, you have to try and get as far as possible on that 1 life, as well as get any achievements the game might have to offer.

More specifically, you are riding or driving an epic coaster down a track that is made up of broken pieces of track. The goal is... well there isn't really any goal, just don't fall off and get lots of points is really all there is. You hit space to jump, and get extra points at often seemingly random times, and there are like 80 achievements in the game, so you are unlocking something every few seconds when you first start.

Dieing happens quite quickly, with once you plummet over the edge, you start back at the main screen very fast, and since you can just keep hitting space to start the game becomes very fluid. It is easy to hammer off a few tries and runs, and not notice the fact that you did... I like that feature.

Music can be disabled if you want, and it does have a slightly short track, but it is bearable and I never turned it off once. The difficulty does ramp up eventually, and getting the 15,000 meter achievement is a tad tricky, but quite possible.

Overall I enjoyed this little game, it's small, lightweight, addicting and fun... everything that a flash game should be sometimes. I would absolutely recommend this game to kill a little bit of time during the day.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.5/5

Overall: 3.6/5

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Flash Game Review: Junk Battles

2010-08-17T00:47:00.004-04:00

Junk Battles, a game hosted on Kongregate, our favorite flash site, is a multi-player online game with very little actual good game play... honestly unless you are going to play for a few days, don't bother to.

You see, this game is focused around an RPG style adventure game that has you building various ships and contraptions to complete quests and battle other players in PvP format... I have to say, when I read the name I thought it was a short game based off the popular show called battle bots. Turns out I was totally wrong, the game is huge with tournaments, weekly and monthly awards, and absurdly long game play.

And it doesn't even do that part well. This game seems like a total failure, it has no addictive qualities, I forced myself to play it for nearly 6 hours just to see if it got any better and it doesn't. The sound is repetitive, the graphics aren't anything really special for this type of game, and the depth of character or story is nonexistent.

So this game, honestly, has no purpose in it's existence whatsoever, you are better off paying signing up for a 10-day free trial of WoW and playing that... However in the interest of flash game reviews, I must concede and still describe this game in it's fullest, the good parts, the bad, and just about everything else.

So to start off, you are a pilot or builder of some nature who must scavenge for parts by any means necessary in order to build a craft to fight. This craft is also your health, your special attacks, and your mode of transportation around the world. The game starts off fairly slow, and takes a while before there is any point in customizing a ride at all. The game is broken into several components: questing gets you packs of items as well as levels. There is a garage for both PvP and world use... certain items have restrictions in the world map and can only be used in controlled PvP. There is no global PvP in the sense that you can run into a person, it is all organized and you can never do it if you want.

You start off in a small town talking to a fellow named Rusty, this section helps with the tutorial, which is one thing the game does very well. It teaches the basics of both combat, as well as building a craft, and navigating the game. The music and sounds will drive you literally up the wall insane, and I suggest disabling them as quickly as possible... which is accessible from anywhere in the game.

After a brief time you will enter your first battle. The type of combat engine is similar to a Final Fantasy style with something like an attack timer. Instead of a bar that fills up before you can attack you have something called your piston. This is essentially the thing that "loads" attacks and into your bar, they then travel for a short time until exiting and actually going off. What this means basically is that when you click an attack it doesn't happen right away. You can also see your enemies attack bar, and can tell what attacks are coming. There is only ever one enemy doing battle with you at a time, so you can definitely focus during combat.

The average enemy will give you no trouble at all, however if you engage in PvP know this, everyone is better and will beat you. There literally are people who sit on this game for like 8 hours a day, and breath and sleep it... a serious waste of time if you ask me. The game deserves a few hours a day for a week at most, and honestly I'd stay away from it the same way you should stay away from rabid wolverines.

There is also an auction section to the game where people with smurf accounts buy and sell to get their under leveled accounts super good items so they can smash you in PvP when they are bored of smashing you with their regular accounts. This isn't actually an exaggeration, there was a group of people telling everyone to stay away from someone who was specifically doing it... even tho they all do it. The game develops more and more options with regards to combat, and a few new items and chassis types but I mean it never REALLY changes at all.

The game play will stay simple, you will always want to slice your throat open, and at some point you WILL rip your speakers in half, hulk style. I have to say, this game lacks a lot of effort and polishing, like you would figure the guys testing it would tell the lead designers how much the music SUCKS. All in all I am sure you can pretty well guess what I thought of this game... sorry Kongregate normally your stuff is awesome... but not here.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 2.0/5
Addictiveness: 1.5/5
Sound: 2.0/5
Simplicity: 2.0/5

Overall: 2.0/5

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Flash Game Review: Bloons Tower Defense 4

2010-08-05T05:20:00.003-04:00

The most recent in the Bloons TD saga, Bloons Tower Defense 4, claims to be the best, with new features and updated game play. As far as the others found on Kongregate, it really does hold true and does improve on the originals... but enough to warrant playing it, we will soon find out...

Low and behold it does! Yes the fourth installment of this title does actually have a reason to exist, and it isn't just a ploy by the author to make money... although you can be sure that he is sure trying to make a lot of money off of it. This site has a feature where you can purchase upgrades in game using cash, something I would never encourage... but if you want to I suppose feel free. However, even without any upgrades this game sure does take some metaphorical cake. It offers new towers, new levels, and all new pathing. The more options included in this version do make it better than the original. Some features that I noted specifically were the individual towers behavior such as which balloon to target, as well as a ranking system.

For those new to Tower Defense games, baddies travel along a predetermined path trying to escape and claim your lives, it's your job to stop them. To do so, a variety of towers must be employed... I do mean variety, this game is impossible to beat using only 1 or 2 types of towers. Personally I found that without the use of at least 6 or 7 different combinations it was extremely difficult to beat the medium and hard settings.

In any event, Bloons TD 4 has implemented two main features I want to comment on. Firstly is the ability to unlock new rankings. As you gain levels and rankings through killing massive numbers of Bloons you will gain new upgrades for your towers. These upgrades are what will allow you to supersede some of the more difficult stages. Upgrades range from missiles that deal extra damage to Bloons blimps to Super Monkey storms that clear all baddies from the screen. This I suppose could be labeled as an RPG style element, but I would call it more just a slightly more complex upgrade system that encourages users to continue playing. Essentially, you gain rankings and get new bonuses for existing towers, and in the first stage you actually have to unlock the towers.

More new features include the ability to save current games, so if you are currently working on a level and have something important come up you can save your design. Music and sounds can be disabled during the game without going to a menu, and the layout of the screen is fairly clean without alot of distractions.

There is also now a variety of tracks to chose from, also there is an upgrade pack you can buy, and even user designed tracks can be made. Another addition is sandbox mode, in which you have unlimited cash to do with what you please, and Armageddon mode, where once the Bloons start they never stop.

As far as difficulty, this version does step it up ever so slightly. No longer can you simply rush a super monkey and win the game. Now levels required more planning and a lot more creativity in defense. I found an excellent array of multi-directional towers combined with freeze towers, bomb towers, single dart monkey and upgrade towers works well. Finally Super monkeys do add that last bit of defense that just obliterates most things... but don't be fooled, those blimps will still stop even some of the most stalwart defense.

Overall I was quite pleased with this version of a TD game. It updates the older version, adds some new features, ramps up difficulty and doesn't ruin what it was doing well. I would encourage everyone to play this game, be it for 30 minutes or 3 hours you won't be disappointed.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.4/5

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Flash Game Review: UPGRADE COMPLETE!

2010-08-04T10:52:00.001-04:00

Nothing makes me more angry than a 14-year old typing in all caps when I am crushing him in a video game... what does this have to do with flash games you ask? Well, when a game has a title like UPGRADE COMPLETE! you can only guess the type of game it is...

Now, I don't mean to just bash another flash game for having a stupid idea for a game... but this one is just plain dumb. It can be found on Kongregate, and is very inventive in how it works. I mean don't get me wrong, it is also very stupid in how it works... but at least it is creative. I mean the premise alone is absurd, the opening of the game is a dead give away to how pointless this flash game will wind up being. You start off by having to 'purchase' a store that lets you upgrade your video game. The idea being that you need to upgrade everything completely in the game to finish it off. There is no skill at all involved in this game. Absolutely none, the levels even tell you that there is no negative repercussions for failing at a stage, like what the hell is with that.

The game has three main sections. In the first users upgrade the actual game itself, ranging from the graphics engine to the copyright information, it's all upgradable. This is the main feature of the game... I know what a feature right. Normally when I play a flash game, I want to actually play the game, not just click buttons to change the look.

The second stage is the ship builder, which I have to admit is kinda cool. You have a red box, and anything you add to this space will become attached to your ship. It doesn't need to actually be touching your ship, just inside the area. I would have preferred to see a bit more detail in that, but what can you ask for from a 13-year old who has caps lock on in the title. The ship builder allows you to upgrade the individual parts to your ship as well as reconfigure and sell parts.

The final section is what you could call the 'actual' game, at least in the usual sense. It is the part to the game where you collect money and advance to new levels of baddies. The game plays out like a space shooter in which waves of enemies descend from the top of the screen and move downwards, slowly, without shooting. Each time you kill one they drop some money, you get the money and can then progress your upgrades. If you fail on a wave... don't worry it doesn't matter, there is nothing negative at all for failing.

In fact, there is nothing negative anywhere in this entire game that can happen. You can never lose, never need to restart, never feel like you suck. This game has no competitive flavor at all. The only thing that monitors anything is a little game timer that checks how long you have been playing for. This game has sound that I could improve myself, and as far as graphics... well they change over time, but the end ones look pretty nice.

All in all, I don't see the purpose for this game, it is neither addictive and makes you want to play it forever or competitive and makes you want to win. Things that don't have a purpose usually have no reason for first being made. I feel like this game has several game play improvements that it would need before being very interresting at all.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.0/5
Interface: 2.0/5
Addictiveness: 1.0/5
Sound: 2.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 2.0/5

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Flash Game Review: Hello Worlds!

2010-07-29T11:09:00.001-04:00

Universities, good for more than just simple education. Hello Worlds! is the by-product out of the University of Washington, and is a flash game that is very unique, and reasonably damn fun. Granted it doesn't have THAT much replay value, and once you beat every level, there really isn't much else to it...

But my god this game is creative in every way you can imagine, from level design to extra features, it doesn't get much better.

The game puts users in control of.. well there are actually multiple characters to select from, so you can be everything from a turtle to a little dude to a crab, take your pick. Since you start off as a crab, and all characters have the same attributes, I'll just refer to you as a crab. Little crab guy is soooo cute... anyway on to the game.

So, Hello Worlds! is a flash-based [puzzle]/[adventure]/[omfg physics engine] hybrid hosted on Kongregate. It has no enemies in it, there is no REAL time limit on each level, and you can't really die. Sounds easy right? Think again.

Levels start off fairly easy, where your only objective is to get from your spawn to the red door and press the space bar to beat the level. However, along the way there are coins for you to collect, as usual, but the coins aren't essential to beating the level. You see for each level completed you can receive 1-3 stars, with certain levels having a special star that can add another, making the total 4. Stars are awarded for completing the level, collecting all the coins, and completing the level under a certain time. The first 15 levels or so are fairly easy to complete fully the first time through.

However, due to the complex nature of some of the levels, not all are completed that fast. You see... the levels are not as simple as you first think. Each level is comprised of as many as 4 separate screens at once. All environmental factors are always present, so if a wall exists in 1 world, it exists in all of the screens you can see. Pressing the 'C' button will merge all of the worlds so you can see how they interconnect better, however while they are merged you can't move.

Now, various other features play into the game, like green doors. Green doors will close the particular world that you are currently on, removing all of it's environmentals as well as any remaining coins. Often it is essential to collect certain coins in the red door world before closing off a green world door. This is because some platforms are required to get to certain places. However, if you screw up don't worry, there is always a rewind button.

Hold 'V' and you will immediately rewind the actions that had taken place. There is a decent amount of time for the rewind, and it doesn't run out if you use it repeatedly. Some levels make exceptionally good use of it, and others you will find you don't even use the feature.

Now there is a second type of door, it is silver with a hint of yellow in the middle, and these will switch or open new worlds. I personally have never seen a game that features this type of play, and it will be confusing to start for many, once you get used to it tho it is pure genius. Whoever wrote this game was insane one day when he came up with the concept. There are multiple groups of stages, each group having around 6 levels. Certain more advanced groups of levels can only be reached once you have accumulated a certain number of stars... This reminded me of Super Mario 64, where you could only open doors with the right number of stars.

Aside from the par time for each level, there is also a special speed run time that is given. This time is usually VERY fast, much faster than you would think possible, how each time is attainable and will increase your score dramatically

Now, as far as physics, the game is fairly flawless. I mean there is only 1 glitch I encountered that has to do with jumping and closing a world and getting caught in between two dividers... but you can always just rewind and fix the problem. This means that if any bugs do come up... just rewind.

Overall this game is simply amazing. It is a completely new take on puzzle games, and really does deliver a new type of flash game experience, something hard to come by these days. Since the author is said to be updating regularly, it might have some replay value, but once you've gone through every level, it loses it's entertainment a little bit. But trust me, the first 30 minutes is MORE than worth it.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.5/5

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Flash Game Review: MARDEK RPG - Chapter 3

2010-07-27T05:23:00.001-04:00

The third installment of the MARDEK RPG series of games, which is also the current one, is absolutely massive. I had to stop playing because it was suddenly 3 AM, and I have class tomorrow. MARDEK RPG: Chapter 3 on Kongregate, has to be the single largest flash-based RPG I have ever played... ever.

If you haven't taken a look at them, you can find reviews here for MARDEK RPG: Chapter 1, and MARDEK RPG: Chapter 2 on this site. It isn't required that you play through either chapter, but rest assured you will be missing out on valuable levels, equipment, and plot detail. These games, eventually there are supposed to be 8 chapters, have save game files that carry over from one to another. So as long as you manage to finish the chapter before it, your saved file will carry over.

Well for the first chapter, this wasn't bad. After 30 minutes you were done... the second chapter was significantly longer at close to 3 hours of game play available... And to give you an idea, I am nearly 5 hours into the 3rd chapter (the game play clock carries from one chapter to another), and I have only completed the first main story arc. Conveniently, the author has made a number of changes in game play to the third chapter, some good, and some bad.. still has no real music.

*Note, if you are unfamiliar with the majority of the game, I suggest you read over chapter 1 review, it will give you a brief understanding of the game.

The first thing that has been noticeably changed is the difficulty level. Boss fights have become harder, average monsters deal more damage, and maps are a lot larger. To stress that point, some maps have become so difficult to navigate they actually have a fog over them where you can only see immediately around you, and your overview map is useless. These few changes alone take this game out of casual gaming space, and thrust it into the hardcore flash game realm. This game is going to take an eternity to beat, I am sure I will log close to 50 hours of game play by the time the series is over... but mark my words I will play through it all.

Your party is also becoming more and more diversified. If you get all of the possible members to chose from you end up with a very respectable selection size. As far as party composition, I would recommend having at least an off healer besides Mardek, this will let him dish out some physical damage when he needs to. Aside from that, just tailoring the specific party to each zone is the key to winning. Since party members can be swapped out at save point crystals this is something you should never neglect just because of laziness. Having the right party composition will make or break your boss fights.

Another feature that is now more and more prominent is the reaction's portion of the game. If you are unfamiliar totally with this, check out the picture in this article referencing the character and skills screen. Reaction's are something that are used during combat, they can be passive offensive and defensive, and either magical or physical. When that little bar starts moving across the bottom of the screen, and hits the filled in portion press [X]. This will trigger the Reaction, and whatever it's specified effect is. Some reactions will increase damage output, some critical hit chance, and others have nothing to do with combat at all. Balancing which Reations to use is also an important feature, and since you are getting more and more available reactions, some will start taking priority.

Another change is the wide variety of environments. There are sand tunnels, dark temples, winding desert paths, even a port that requires you to answer a series of questions, prior to boarding the ship, designed to add some comic relief to the game. I have absolute faith that as the saga of Mardek progress' even farther, more and more detailed and content rich features will be added to this game.

Now there is a full walkthrough written, I assume it was done by the author himself because it can be slightly vague at times, but still good enough to help you out. Also, there is A LOT of bonus content in this game. I would say that nearly half of the overall game play is from bonus questing alone. That being said, you are not required to complete these quests, but they do award you achievements on Kongregate, as well as better gear in the game usually. This means that future chapters will be easier.

My only qualm was not knowing how much I would wish I would have kept different types of items. This game has a massive inventory system, and dozens of spots for save files. I would suggest making use of these features, or at least the inventory space. Never sell any weapon or piece of armor that has any future potential, I guarantee you will regret it... I know I did.

I am avoiding most of the plot for a good reason. This game is driven by plot, I mean the actual game play is fun, but nothing is more desirable than finishing a quest only to have something horrible happen, or a new piece of information come to light. This is how I can tell that this series will absolutely go down in flash game history. To date I have never played a game as large or as rich in content on the flash system. Nor have I played one that carries over so much information from one chapter to the next. It honestly feels like one flash game spread out over different chapters... exactly how it should feel. The author pulls off everything he is trying to do with a wonderful degree of seeming perfectionism.

Overall I have to say, I can't wait to get home tomorrow night and see how this story arc ends. I also can't wait to start the next installment of MARDEK RPG. I would recommend everyone spend the time to play through this game start to finish. However, if you are only into casual flash games, this title will not be for you. It will not be over quickly at all.

Rating:

Longevity: 5.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 4.1/5

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Flash Game Review: MARDEK RPG - Chapter 2

2010-07-25T20:23:00.002-04:00

The second chapter in an epic story of bravery and courage, MARDEK RPG: Chapter 2 builds takes off where MARDEK RPG: Chapter 1 ends... and it continues in the same good manor. Found on Kongregate, it incorporates exactly what you'd expect from a game of this nature, magic, levels, and plot development.

This will focus more on the second chapter itself, and the new features it brings... or at least the ones it expands on, for a review of the original game see the review of chapter 1 found here.

So, this second installment doesn't make any changes to the game engine at all, a brilliant move seeing as the first one was great as it was. This game is now plot rich, the previous game took a mere 30 minutes to beat, where as I am 2 hours deep and still am unsure how developed the game will get. That means this review is not based on the entire game, so I can't speak of somethings... the only thing I can say is that Mardek and his friends have their work cut out for them. As far as difficulty, it would seem the number of random encounters has gone up from the first, and the complexity of enemies has also increased.

Shops are found in the main town, and I am sure by now you have got lots of gold from your travels. Before buying lots of one item, make sure your characters can equip them as some items cannot be used by everyone. Also I would be apprehensive about selling off potions, you might not need them early on but speaking from experience, once you reach the caves... you really do need them.

Another expansion is that now inventory management is much more clear, and equipment does play a part. Your party begins to get expanded beyond the two friends that started off, and sometimes party members change regularly. You get a mage added to your party, who does no damage physically, but has devastating spells. In fact when you first get her your physical damage seems almost non-existent compared to her damage output. This changes however once you start to get some better gear for the main character and his best friend.

Save points work in a similar fashion, but now you will be glad for the healing properties they offer. Not only that, they also rejuvenate magic points, the currency for casting spells, and since potions for these are much more rare I'd save whenever possible.

When you pick up items keep an eye on which party member is selected, they do not share a common inventory. Even tho you might think when on the menu screen that the inventory you see is the only one... you are wrong. Each party member has their own inventory, which means that you will never run out of room, and everyone can carry a pheonixdown[used to resurrect dead members]. Stacks of items are split very easily, and items are swapped in a similarly simplistic manor.

Now, as far as plot goes you wake up a few years down the road, with Mardek and his friend joining the ranks of soldiers in an effort to fight evil, gain experience and become heroes. They are tasked with a simple quest to start, find and fight off some bandits, and some fellow recruits go with them. However things take a terrible toll when one of the recruits dies in a horrible accident. Everyone agrees to cover it up, and sure enough you are inducted into soldier hood. The next morning your quests take you to the far east of the global map, to a city plagued by more monsters. On the way is a side quest in a lake, worth the experience, and then off to the city.

Honestly, I don't want to give away the entire game, but it's a good play, and will take a reasonable amount of time to beat. I would not recommend this as a short and quick flash game, but rather something to spend the time to beat. The combat system gets more evolved in the second one as now you need to look at buffs and debuffs, as well as different creature types.

Overall, MARDEK RPG: Chapter 2 picks up nicely where the first one left off, I intend full to go now and finish this second chapter. I'd encourage everyone who played through the first to do the same, and keep your eyes and RSS readers open for the next chapter in the MARDEK saga.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.8/5

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Flash Game Review: MARDEK RPG - Chapter 1

2010-07-24T20:15:00.002-04:00

Sometimes you just need to bust out a classic, hammer out hours and hours on an old school NES until your fingers bleed... in this case tho there is now an online equivalent! That's right, MARDEK RPG Chapter 1 on Kongregate is in the same style of an old school RPG, and I love those.

Just to start off, I want to say that this game has 3 chapters currently available on Kongregate with a total of 8 being written by the author. This review only looks at the first of those 3 chapters, but you will find the next two chapters reviewed in the next two days. Let me also say, that this chapter can easily be beat in under 30 minutes. I had to save two or three times without need, and I could have skipped a few sections and still, as you will see later, I did it in just shy of 30 minutes.

So gamers take the role of the main character Mardek,you are an adventurer capable of slaying dragons and saving the princes. In fact that's exactly how this chapter starts out. You run around a castle, and fight a dragon and kill it. You start off at like level 50 or something, and you just annihilate it. The point is tho, the game teaches you a few things about reflex's and the controls get familiar in the few fights that you do. At that point in time you are warped back to your current existence or something, and you are level 1 again. Don't worry tho, levels are gained fairly quickly, and by the time the game ends I was around level 3.

There are two different main parts to the game. The running around, and the fighting. This is pretty standard for anyone who is used to these Final Fantasy style RPG games. This one, even tho flash games have made massive inroads into graphics, still insists on using an old school sprite based engine. Have to say, I really do love the choice of the author to do this. The maps are fairly detailed, and the shops are present which remind us greatly of Final Fantasy 1. In fact I honestly think some of the emblems and logo's for shops were lifted straight out of that game. Saving is handled not at an inn, but at blue crystals littered around the world, walk up hit activate, save and heal and you are off again.

The combat system is also very Final Fantasy 1, no attack timers just pure turn based combat. At the top of the combat screen you will see the order that the turns will occur in, something I've never seen before in this style of game. It helps quite a bit with the memory work since it means you don't need to memorize the attack turns of your characters. This will prevent you from forgetting that the monster attacks BEFORE your mage heals as opposed to after. While this does simplify combat, I don't feel it reduces the enjoyment of the game, hell this isn't ACTUALLY the original... and that game was brutally difficult.

The controls are handled like you are holding an old NES controller. You have movement keys for arrows, and [Z] and [X] are you accept and cancel buttons. However, the author was smart to know that computers have mice, and so for some more complex menus you will see a little mouse icon indicating that you should us your pointing device. Simple things that this are what I am sure will promise to make this a fantastic series of games.

Now to the meat of this one. once returning to your home town, and going to sleep for the night, you witness a flying object crash land nearby. Being adventurers of course means investigating this crash, and so you do. Encounters are handled randomly, with your character pausing an icon flashing and you being taken into the fight. I feel that there could have been a slightly higher number of random encounters, but that's just my personal feelings, and doesn't detract from the game.

Upon reaching the end of the forest, you must battle a mean bully that requires a touch of healing on your part. This is where your skills come into play. You have an attack type called 'imagination', which can be thought of like a type of magic. And inside this attack type you have two abilities to start, one heals the caster and one attacks the monster with more power but less accuracy. Now for this early on in the MARDEK series, I don't think either is really required, but it never hurts to play around with things so you can use them in the future.

After dispatching the big bad bully, you must venture forth into the downed flying ship where you discover the brutal corpse of... well... something. It then injects itself into Mardek's body, sharing his physical form with him.

This is where the massive plot dialogue starts. To warn you, this game is extremely rich in dialogue, it doesn't just have alot of it, it is also well written and slightly sarcastic. You can always skip through it if you want, but I suggest reading it, these types of RPG's are good because of their stories also.

Either way you chose, once you finish that sequence, you just go back home. Navigating larger sections of the world allow you to actually move freely between different parts. What I mean is, when you step on a little blue arrow, you can move as far as you have traveled previously... sort of like a warp gate that gets you to any destination you have been to previously. So once you warp back to the village, and get to your house and goto sleep, we get A MASSIVE amount of plot details, and then the chapter concludes with giving you the option to save.

I'd save now, the reason being is you can then load your save file from one chapter of this RPG to another, which is exactly what I will be doing.

Overall, the game play in this flash game is limited to start, however the game has a fantastic engine, and the start of a great plot. I can't wait to see the rest of this saga unfold as time comes, so I hope you join me and we can play through it all.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.8/5

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Flash Game Review: Epic War 4

2010-07-24T00:24:00.001-04:00

IT'S EPIC! Well at least, that's in the title, but to decide if Epic War 4 is truly epic, you need to play this title... hell this is the 4th installment of this game. It remains very popular on the flash game site Kongregate, and for good reason. At first glance you think this game is similar to a lot of other titles. You mass units across a horizontal battlefield, this is similar to a few titles.... only this one is better. The majority of games similar to Epic War 4 lack depth, they have a limited battlefield, or have a single dimension that you need to worry about like which of four units to deploy. Perhaps the title even has spells to manage... but the thing is Epic War 4 has depth, it has strategy, it has RPG elements, and it has a good deal of difficulty.

Honestly, this game really does roll a lot of things together. I mean hell, I discounted it at first glance, the first 2 or 3 levels played through like a breeze, but as I started having to forfeit levels, go back and get experience before progressing, I saw the difficulty. When I first won my battle by strategy instead of just pressing 'assault' I knew I had found a winner.

So to start, users are in control of heroes. These heroes have troops under their control, and you are trying to lay siege to individual castles on each stage. Every stage has different elements of difficulty, and need to be approached so. You start with only one hero, and only one unit type to go with your hero. This seems simple to start, and that's because it really is. The thing is tho, once you start to win battle's you accumulate gold. This gold is used for upgrades, as well as unlocking new units to deploy, new heroes, and upgrades to your own castle for during fights. Not only that, but you can only bring three heroes at a time, and those three have a limit of two unit types each during combat.

That sounds like a lot to think about, but it becomes very self-evident what types of units work well together. There is everything from pixies that will heal your troops as they press the war to succubi that fire flame jets that propel enemies upwards and deal massive AOE damage. Your hero options vary just as much, and they also need to be upgraded to make them live longer. Don't worry tho, if your hero dies in combat it does not spell instant defeat.

In fact quite the opposite. If and when your hero does die in combat, all it means is that the units he has control over can no longer spawn, and they can no longer be controlled until that hero has re-spawned. If a hero is not in combat he will regenerate health over time. This leads to battlefield tactics that imply both charges that spell certain doom for your hero in order to win the fight as well as intelligent retreats to mass more forces. Some heroes can attack from great distances, this means that holding a point close enough on the map to attack a castle but not to close allows an easy victory.

Did I mention you have control of devastating spells also?

That's right, you have control of spells you can purchase with gold and equip before combat. These can lead to devastation for your enemies. Everything is available from hails of arrows to temporarily invulnerability, it's all possible. This needs to be balanced in combat with the use of mana. Mana is regenerated over time, however at the start of a map you spawn with zero mana. Sometimes in order to push through enemy lines I had to sit back and defend until I had mana to cast spells of death and destruction over and over again.

If I seem like I am ranting and raving about how good this game is, it is simply because I am. It has a lot of features I really like, it has multiple levels of difficulty, and some stages required me to rethink what I was doing in order to win. The sound and music was well suited to the game, and it had a wide range of options and things to turn off or on accordingly. It got a little choppy when there were 50+ units all casting magic with full animations... but that can get turned down if you need it to be.

Overall I was very pleased with this game. Expect to get through at least 5 or 6 levels in 30 minutes, but then expect to put off whatever else you were doing to try and get through the rest of the game... A word of advice. When you reach the dragon and wooden horse respectively, take your time... it's not a race to win the map. Play smart and you can beat them.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.5/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.8/5

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Flash Game Review: Best Friends Forever 3

2010-07-22T23:57:00.001-04:00

They are hardy miners. They are stuck down there, trapped with seemingly no way out. They are supposed to be best friends, and it is your job to get them the hell out of there! Best Friends Forever 3 is a cool twist on the usual puzzler where you need to escape something. And I mean it isn't as bad as some games I've played. This one I even found while watching a friend of mine play it in class, I inquired as to what it was and decided I'd play it. To be quiet frank, he said it was a touch easy, and the puzzles were not very creative, and he happens to be right.

This game puts you in charge of 3 miners who are all trying to get home for various reasons.. one to his wife, another to some booze... you get the picture. The back stories are not as important as the control elements tho. You see you must control all 3 miners and make them work together if you are ever to get out of the cave alive. This can include everything from holding down switches for each other, using a pick axe to break through, even standing on each others heads is a potential technique.

This game does have a reasonable degree of complexity. Some puzzles require thought planning and execution. Also, when it comes to flash games, while the graphics weren't stellar, they fit the feel of the game nicely. Tutorials are delivered in unique fashion. Instead of being told things, you run across signage and some of it is helpful, while other signs will have you jumping into pits that you shouldn't jump into. You can clearly tell this was written by an author who likes gaming, it has a sarcastic wit to it that spells delightful. Even the very end is a joke.

The way you escape each of the 33 levels is by running your miners to the exit door, and simply have them all stand on or near it. That's it, and it really is as simple as it sounds. I mean when I say it has complexity, I mean a level might take you 2,3 maybe even 4 tries... but this is not the kind of game you will fail at beating. In fact I am fairly sure anyone can beat this game, and it doesn't take long at all.

It is so short in fact that some levels have timers placed in them where if you breath the noxious fumes for more than 30 seconds you die... you get the point about speed. For everything this game is, it isn't to bad. There is a hint of bonus content, but not much and it really doesn't give you a good reason to go and do it all. There isn't a timer for each level, and there isn't really a scoring system. Those two elements lacking means that this game has almost no replay value.

The sounds and music do fit the game, and they can easily be disabled from anywhere in the game, always a plus.

Overall I was pleased to have played this short little game, but I don't think I'll ever go back to it... just no reason at all.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 2.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.0/5

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Flash Game Review: High Speed Chase 2

2010-07-21T00:43:00.000-04:00

Today's review is brought to you by SPEEEEEED! ... No not the TV channel if you are familiar with it. I am talking about the noun. I had the pleasure of playing a game called High Speed Chase 2, and honestly, it isn't too bad. I mean it isn't god's gift to mankind, but it works... I suppose.

So, this flash game is good enough to play, good enough to want to beat, but simply to plain to ACTUALLY finish off. That's right, I will admit I never finished this game. Hell I really got past the 50% completed mark, once you try the game you will understand why. the game simply does not have enough variety in content to be any good. I mean it scales in difficulty, but you kinda feel like it doesn't take anymore skill, you feel you are just getting lucky.

You are in control of a car that is in charge of wiping out baddies in other cars. You get imported to a certain piece of track via helicopter, and then the game starts feeling a touch like GTA2 and burnout smashed together. You need to damage the enemy vehicles to a point at which they crash and burn, referred to taking them down... or a take down, not much of a stretch.

The game helps you along providing upgrades and actually has some sort of cash/upgrade system that feels a touch like an RPG but isn't really at all. You see instead of the upgrades being like, more vehicle health or higher average speed, the upgrades instead are stupid. They circle around the power-ups that you get dropped during the actual chases. I mean I suppose this makes sense, but it feels a little silly to drive around and pickup bullets.

Next comes the music, it gets VERY repetitive, VERY quickly. To the point where I wanted to just burn the speakers I have sitting on my desk. Luckily there is a way to disable music, buried in the main menu, can't be changed from the actual chases. However since there is no penalty for failing a chase other than a waste of your time it's OK. I mean you will fail a few of these chases. The bad guys shoot back, and cops are an ever present force to be dealt with, annoying, but still present. They are kinda like that in-law you HAVE to see during the holidays but don't really like.

The game does offer some ramps or something during every chase to propel you up and over cars, but it's a touch over the top, and wasn't really required in the game. Another thing is the author's desire to have people repeat chase's. You get a certain number of points during chases, and you have to get at least a bronze medal to proceed to the next mission. You can also always go back and upgrade your medals by doing better in chases... kinda a giant waste of time.

I have to admit that although my words sound trashy this game wasn't all that bad. It did help me avoid gouging my eyes out, and I never stabbed anyone with a fork during it, so it beats a few games I've had to play. Overall it was incredibly average and did not present me with any reason to ever play it again... ever.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 2.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 2.8/5

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Flash Game Review: Jail Break 3

2010-07-20T00:21:00.000-04:00

Spider-man 1... Awesome movie. Spider-man 2... Decent film... Spider-man 3... Gouge out my eyes please. To be honest, few trilogies live up to anyone's expectations, and usually aren't even worth watching or playing. And to be honest Jail Break 3, while mildly fun is fun in the same way stabbing a fork into your hand can be fun, painfully so.

It is basic, not long, not very challenging and VERY repetitive. Like... super repetitive. I actually managed to play through this game twice, the first time took 12 minutes as I was doing other things, the second took 7:15. The game is more of a speed run type game as opposed to one that is difficult.

Controls have arrows and a space bar for sprinting. The object is to run the little black circle to the exit of each level without walking into anything that will catch you. And honestly, the things that catch you are incredibly dumb, and very easy to avoid. The hardest task is remembering to not move on the red stuff.

The background music is weak at best, and there is no way to disable it so it gets really stupid after a short while. The game is fairly responsive when it comes to controls, but you will never be able to tell because once you are good with them the game ends.

It literally takes 7 minutes to beat this game... not even close to 30. However, it is a touch fun as a speed run type game. Actually in mid writing this post, I went back and managed to shave a few seconds off my run. However I won't go back again.

I would encourage you to try this game, play through it and see if you can get your time down to under 7 minutes. But other than that, go play another game. Something else will entertain you much much more.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.0/5
Interface: 2.5/5
Addictiveness: 1.0/5
Sound: 2.0/5
Simplicity: 4.5/5

Overall: 2.2/5

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Flash Game Review: GemCraft chapter 0

2010-07-16T01:57:00.000-04:00

Today's game is another Tower Defense styled flash game. However this one is incredibly unique in both it's extra elements as well as the way towers are actually built. I have to say, tho fairly complicated, GemCraft really does do flash games everywhere justice.

Man, what a game this is. Normally I never play through tutorials, but I opened a level almost right away to jump into what I thought was simply another defense game. Boy oh boy was I in for a huge surprise. This game revolutionizes TD games in a totally different way than anything before it that I have played. This game incorporates a totally new style of building towers, RPG elements that don't get in the way, and extra features galore that will make you want to keep playing. I really feel as if this is a game changer when it comes to TD games. After over 15 million plays, this game seems to still be going strong with regular updates from the author. You need to play this game, and I am about to tell you why.

Most tower defense games incorporate a few extra features, perhaps they have unique bosses, or the ability to sell towers. A few offer RPG elements and more than one map. Well this game has everything and more.

Users are to defend a wizards tower from various creatures that try and invade you. This is done by building or using towers. Towers can be used of course by adding gems into them to give them an attack as well as other important properties. Sounds complex? Well it is. This has to be the most in-depth game I have ever played. you see it takes Mana to do almost everything. From building towers to combining gems to make more powerful ones, everything takes mana. This becomes a very interresting balancing act.

Lets start at the beginning. Gems are of different colors, and can be created with varying degrees of strength. I won't discuss all combinations here, but there are gems that do everything from give you more mana per hit to poison gems. When a gem is created you have no control over the type it is... of course this is map dependent (only certain gems appear on certain maps), so you never know what you are going to get. This can become very frustrating at times, but adds a level of complexity that means you must be flexible. The next step is combining two gems of the same grade or level into one gem. The new gem will be one grade higher and have a combination of properties from the gems below it. This means the combinations can be huge.

Another interesting feature that is totally new is traps. Traps can be placed on the track of monsters, and then loaded with a gem. The gem trap will do a lot less regular damage, but will have an increased special attack. I tried never to use traps, I hate complexity for the sake of complexity, but found it was near impossible at certain levels to do that. Traps can make or break your entire defense.

The next feature this game has is small objects that control different features of the map. There are ones to prevent you from placing a turret in a given space, some will heal monsters when they reach a point. Other will discharge lightning when a gem is dropped into them. These are also very important to pay attention to as they can heavily influence the course of the game... Sometimes you can be about to face defeat and then release a static wave only to save the day.

And then there are the RPG elements. Upon completion of each stage, you gain experience towards a wizard level. Each level you get grants you more skill points to spend improving your abilities. Maybe you want more mana at the start of rounds, perhaps a cheaper way to build towers or better traps. The wide range of flexible skills really does lend the game to be multifaceted with play going a lot of different ways.

And this game gets challenging. Don't get me wrong, the first few levels and painfully easy. However after maybe 5 or 6 the game will get a lot harder and you might find yourself losing once or twice. If you get stuck on a level you can always go back and complete a previous stage over again for more experience. And most stages offer more than one mode, so for sudden death if you finish it you get triple the experience; however if one enemy gets to your tower its lights out.

Speaking of getting to your tower, that's another interesting feature. You see, instead of having a finite number of lives, this game is flexible in that each monster has an amount of mana to banish it. What that means is that when it gets to your tower, that mana is taken away from your pool and the monster cast back to where it came from. If you don't have the mana to banish it, then it is lights out.

Overall, this game has an insane amount of play depth to it. Something that can entertain for hours and hours, and with such complex play, it really is spectacular. I'd have to recommend this game to anyone, because if it's 30 minutes or 3 hours you will still enjoy the game alot.

Rating:

Longevity: 5.0/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 2.0/5

Overall: 3.4/5

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Flash Game Review: Lemonade World

2010-07-15T00:28:00.000-04:00

SELL! SELL! SELL! That is the mindset in this game. Lemonade World seems to be like every other 'tycoon' style game. Where you need to balance buying selling, price and recipe. Also it includes advertising and resources... sounds like a lot? Not quite, it's the entire game.

You see, usually in these reviews I find I have a lot to talk about, be it sound or graphics or game play, or who knows what... well this is not the case. This game is simply put, not very fun. You see, the game play is both confusing and at times pain painstakingly complicated.

To start, users are put in control of a lemonade stand. Your task is very simple, just sell some lemonade. However along the way you are going to need to do a few things that the average stand owner doesn't need to do. This includes chopping ice, growing and watering your own tree's, and even dealing with advertising.

The game has a 30-day cycle, inside of which you are trying to get as much wealth as possible. Oddly enough the meter displaying how popular your stand is has no bearing on your overall score. This means you can not worry about popularity, and focus just on saving cash and cutting corners.

The game does include the usual contenders such as having to buy cups and sugar and grow lemons and cut ice... and there isn't much else. I thought you might have had a mini-game for cutting ice, but no nothign at all.

A few things that pissed me off about this game were, you can't tell what they think of the lemonade, and you don't know how to change the recipe. The only thing is it shows you what temp it is, and you adjust ice accordingly. However there is no response guide for if you have to much sugar, or not enough. And I just don't get this.

Another thing is the tutorial. It explains what you are doing and where everything is, but never really explains how to succeed. It more or less leaves that up to the user to kinda fail at. However you never really fail, you jsut get a low score.

The sound is fine, I enjoy the chill relaxed music and everything is easy to turn off and on. But I have to say I was dissapointed in this game.

Overall, I have no drive and no desire to ever play this game again... and I won't. It really is a rather trash title that lacks the polish today's flash games have.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.5/5
Interface: 2.5/5
Addictiveness: 2.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 2.5/5

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Flash Game Review: Cursed Treasure

2010-07-14T02:30:00.001-04:00

Another game that brings a few different elements to the Tower Defense lineup of games. Cursed Treasure is a decent little title that does a couple things differently that you might enjoy.

First let me start out by saying, that after only 30 minutes of game play you won't be very far into the game... maybe to the 6th or 7th stage, but I highly doubt any farther. And for some that's enough, they don't need anymore. But not for me, I need to finish a game, it is something that will drive me into insanity if I don't get it done. But when it comes to this game, I hit the 2nd last stage (number 14) and I spent 4 or 5 attempts and just could not finish it... it really pissed me off actually...

Anyway, on to the game. So it is a very similar type of Tower defense game. Units will spawn from usually one or two locations, however the levels are varied enough to have up to 4 spawn points. Towers are purchased, with only 3 types being available. Once these types get upgraded through the standard process of having to have a certain amount of experience, and spend the required gold things change. You see each of the original 3 towers have 2 additional types once they reach the 4th level of upgrades. This adds for a bit of creativity and planning when building defense.

Now, as opposed to having a limited number of lives, and whenever baddies cross your line losing one, this game takes a different view on the subject. You see on each level you will have crystals that the enemies are trying to capture. Each time an enemy makes it to the crystal area he will pick one up and start moving it back to the spawn point. Users normally start with 5 crystals. As the enemy carries the crystal back to your spawn point, he can be killed. However this means he will drop the crystal where he is killed, closer to the spawn point and closer to where you will lose part of your life. This adds an element not seen in most Tower Defense games but it doesn't really re-invent the wheel.

There is a tutorial of course, and it isn't to hard to figure everything out on your own. Now once you beat a level you are awarded with experience points based on how well you did. These points can then be used to upgrade skills which will affect your game play. I do enjoy this type of RPG style element in a game type that you wouldn't expect it. However one thing I did not enjoy was the fact that once you confirm your skills, you can never go back and readjust them. This seems unrequired, and just complicates the game I felt.

Now another feature they added is that each type of tower can only be placed on the correct piece of corresponding land. This means you can't spam only one type of tower, and because of forest area, you can't just put towers anywhere. There is also a magic component with you having access to three separate spells. There is an ax which allows you to remove forest and build more towers. There is a fireball spell, and an ability that makes your towers shoot faster for a limited time. This is all fine and well, but I wish there was more depth in this area of the game.

The sound is a touch loud, and will probably get on your nerves after a short amount of time. But have no fear the mute button is here! that's right just click SOUND in the upper left at any point and the game is instantly on mute, a very nice feature.

So overall I have to say that as far as TD games go, it is a slight bit different, but by no means is it jaw-dropingly good, I wouldn't suggest this over any other mediocre defense style game.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 2.5/5
Sound: 2.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 2.9/5

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Flash Game Review: Amorphous+

2010-07-11T20:21:00.001-04:00

Come, the nests are expanding, and we need each and everyone to wield their buster swords to defeat the threat of invasion from the Glooples. Amorphous+ is a wonderfully simple game, that has complex elements woven into it.

I have to say, this game didn't seem like much at the start. With it's highly simplistic graphics, and repeated game play, I discounted as nothing more than a waste of my time. But such it is with things of beauty. You see this game is quite clever, and has a huge variety of play to offer the average gamer. It's levels are not that short, the enemies are extremely varied, and there is an extra rewards system you won't know exists until you read about it.

Gamers are put in control of a sword wielding man who must clear nests of creatures called Glooples... what an odd name no? I have to be honest. You will stand in the screen (the screen never moves), in a map where you can go anywhere and things will spawn at you. Now don't be fooled, they can spawn pretty fast, and are extremely varied in their type. The objective is the clear the entire nest and win. You move around by moving your cursor, this means you will usually be moving, always a good thing.

There is no gaining levels or anything, however you will find yourself earning random medals over the course of the game. Once you reach a certain number you are awarded a key. This key, on the main menu, will help you unlock a reward. These rewards will help you slaughter the enemies more and more. There are essentially 2 modes, Single Nest and Bounty Run. In single nest the goal is to wipe out a certain number of enemies, the number is determined by the seize of the next you tackle. I started off with a small nest, and I have to say taking out 200 of those things is more difficult than it would seem.

You see, there are a total of 17 different species, and each have unique features that separate them from the rest. There are ones that will do nothing but stun you, ones that will swallow you whole, even ones that explode when struck and leave behind an acidic ooze that will kill anything that touches it. This is where the game flourishes. Dealing with the huge variety is something that gets more and more challenging. Don't worry to much tho, you still just swing a sword and cut things apart.

But there is more... In Bounty Run you try and simply clear as many enemies as possible, and the difficulty slowly increases. The game has a lot of flexibility in that manor. It lets you change a lot of the settings from the menu including even the spawn rate; the number of Glooples that can be on screen at once. This ability to change difficulty adds an element that we don't see in most games, being user friendly. Nothing is more bothersome then when a game is so difficult you can even get started.

Then there is the work the author has put in. He has a fully functional bestiary in which all enemies you've encountered can be read about and their weakness's learned. This just goes to show the amount of work that has been put into this flash game. So even tho the graphics are a bit outdated, don't let that fool you, this one has some good potential to be taken to great heights.

So overall I have to say it's pretty good, but I mean it struggles to find it's place in the flash game market. You see it isn't short enough to be considered just a game you play over and over and over, and yet it is to short to take the time to play for a long period. So in the end I can't score this game that highly because while it does everything really well... it just lacks a reason to exist.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.2/5

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Flash Game Review: Protector

2010-07-10T02:39:00.001-04:00

Another tower defense game... another system of the same path, and one simplistic idea where you build the same as every other game and then you win... Well think again. Protector is a totally new form of tower defense. And let me tell you, it is hard, very full of depth, and will make you want to finish the game... if you can.

If you have ever played a TD game in your life, especially the original, you will know that a lot of them are similar and follow the same type of pattern. There are a number of waves, you need to build turrets and upgrade so that you defeat all the enemies. Well mostly these games degrade once you hit a certain level. The reason for this is you reach a certain upgrade level, and the enemies die so fast and the cash comes in so quickly that you can never lose.

Protector doesn't do that... ever.

This game instead puts users initially in the view of a map, and seeing this map you are encouraged to play through the tutorial. Well if you have played TD games before, I would not recommend the tutorial, it's a bit of a waste of time. If you haven't then that is the place to start for you.

After the tutorial you will realize that this game is almost an RPG tower defense game, and yet it's not quite that. So to start, there are multiple maps. Imagine you need to fight onslaughts of enemies on various different battlefields. to do so you need to enlist the support of various spell casters, as well as physical and spell units. These units will remain stationary on the battlefield and can never be replaced... a very important point I will discuss later on.

Units can only be placed on cleared and paved ground. This means that when the map starts, and the path units take is shown, you will have limited areas to put casters. In other words, you REALLY need to plan out ahead what your defense will look like closer towards the end of the map because once you set a caster you cannot remove him. However, areas around the map can be paved and allow you to place a caster there, but it will cost you valuable gold.

And there is more. You see certain waves will have resistances or immunities to certain caster types. Usually maps have a theme, so perhaps the majority of waves have resistance to ice, or fire. Also, some monsters will even adsorb certain attacks and they will get healed. This means you need to analyze the waves that will be coming at you on that map and plan accordingly.

Another interesting feature is the upgrade system that Protector works off. As opposed to the usual, you get gold and you upgrade idea, this game has a new system that is much more complex. Firstly, not only do you need the gold to upgrade, the unit you want to upgrade must have a certain amount of experience before it can get that upgrade. This means if you stack units at the very start of the map, when you place ones back more they won't be able to gain the required XP to get upgraded. This feature of course means inevitably your new units will be rendered useless when they are needed in later stages. The next feature in the upgrade system is that there are two different upgrades you can take. There is a general style, and a specialist style. The specialist one will upgrade the abilities of that caster, frost slows, fire splashes, poison is damage over time... that sort of thing. The second however will upgrade more the damage, range and attack speed of the particular mage. So this game really has a lot more than the average TD style game.

But wait, there's more... You see the final thing they implemented is a system in which after you complete each map you are granted upgrade points. These points allow you to boost specific traits that will affect you on the maps. These range from specialized new units to overall damage on certain casters. Planning for each map will be required.

... Honestly by the time I was doing medium difficulty maps I had to tailor my specific build order, placement and even upgrade point setup to win; you can reset your upgrade points whenever for no penalty. This should indicate that this game is no joke, it is hard. Damn hard.

Now for everything else. There is an auto-save feature, very useful, also you can control the sound easily enough to be good. The game is fairly simple to learn, and won't take more than a few minutes to pickup. Higher levels are a different story tho.

You will not get far in 30 minutes, I should warn. You will most likely finish two maybe three maps. That's it. There is a good chance I will end up going back to this game over and over again until I manage to beat it.

So my overall conclusion is, play this game if you want to spend the time to beat it. If you are looking for a quick fix, or a small tower defense game, this is not the game for you. However, other than those time feature... this game is wonderfully complex, deliciously sinister, and takes everything you will have as a flash gamer to beat it.

Rating:

Longevity: 5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.0/5

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Flash Game Review: Fancy Pants Adventures World 2

2010-07-09T01:27:00.001-04:00

Sequals! My word they seem to be all over the place of late. And let me tell you, The Fancy Pants Adventures World 2 (yes it's that long of a title) REALLY delivers as much or more than the original found here. It has a few more features, but a massive amount of more content.

You see the first Fancy Pants game is rather short. It did make me fairly giddy, but to be quite honest it felt like a game made to demonstrate a flash technique. Or something that was cooked up as a cool physics demonstration that turned into a game. This feeling of it never being made as a game really left me just slightly irked. I felt like the author had the opportunity to add a lot more depth to the game, and he just missed out.

Well, trust me, this version has enough depth for an olympic diver to jump into. There are a lot more levels, the nasty rabbit you have to fight at the very end for your awesome ice cream is fairly hard. Now that says a lot, because while the fight principles are simple, it was VERY tough to execute properly.

Overall game play is still the same, you still run around the world collecting little squiggles, you still jump on spiders and slide down hills. However, aside from just more levels, a few other touches have been made to the game. It handles nicer, with slides being smoother down hills especially on the new types of terrain. And originally wall-jumping was hardly used, well in this new world it is essential to be able to clear the levels. Not only that but now you can play golf!

That's right, the very start of the game has you teeing off on a turtles shell for a round of golf... this is a clue by the way for how to beat the last boss... that dastardly rabbit.

Everything is still fairly kosher. The menu's are still fully interactive, the music is still relaxed and fitting the game perfectly. You can disable it now, as well as being able to turn off stupid scrolling backgrounds if you find them distracting.

Now, it might sound like the game hasn't been updated much. But you'd be wrong. See, little things like your character taking a nap if you don't play much. Or if you pause the game you have the option of locking the keyboard preventing accidental continuing... a feature I've come to love. Also, levels have more detail in them. Trees are more artistic, the level design has more flow to it. It's like the original... only a batter newer and bigger version.

Overall I have to admit, this game simply makes me giddy everything I jump around. Honestly I spent 10 minutes in level select just sliding around on the platforms, it is ACTUALLY addicting... I had to remember to write this instead of just playing. This game might have you even come back a few times after you beat the nasty little rabbit. The trophies are worth collecting and a timer has been added for how fast the quickest time of completion you have is; Just another feature that makes it a little bit better than the original.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 5/5
Sound: 4.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.4/5

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Flash Game Review: Fancy Pants Adventures

2010-07-08T02:53:00.000-04:00

Squiggly lines, and colorful pants are what await you in today's fantastic game. Fancy Pants Adventures is one of those games that you will start to play, and after a few minutes notice yourself actually smiling more and more and more...

This game is simply delightful. No harsh comments about how insanely flashy it is... because it isn't flashy. Nothing about the amazing graphics... they all look quickly hand drawn. It isn't that long of a game... I went through it twice in 30 minutes, once for the review, once for the trophies. It won't have you come back more than maybe once or twice... In fact that is nothing alarmingly good about this game at all.

And that's why it's so wickedly fun. You see, the thing that makes a REALLY good flash game is the unexplainable force that makes you like it. The thing that makes you so giddy you jump around the menu for 5 minutes for fun. Oh yes, this game is entirely interactive... that means no mouse, ever.

You are in control of Mr. Fancy Pants... your job is to, well, the game doesn't really say but I suppose it's to run around and have a good time. There is an evil penguin at the end that needs vanquishing, but don't worry the good ol' 3 hops on the head works perfectly well; granted he has to get stuck to a wall first.

No, the thing that does it about this game is the physics, and the principles behind the design of this game. It seems very simple, very plain, but underneath the basic exterior is something that much more amazing.

A physics engine to blow the rest out of the water. You see it runs off of momentum it would seem. That and 'S' for jump. You open doors by pressing the up arrow, and run with left and right. Otherwise, there are no other controls at all.

To complete levels you only need reach the end and walk through the door. You don't need to collect the squiggles, but you will try. The damage you take from the few enemies that exist is minimal. And it is quickly healed from picking up those hand drawn shapes.

The thing is tho, you can do little back flips, and jump off bounce pads, and slide down ramps... this game makes me feel twelve. That really is the only accurate way to describe it. As for the rest, well the sound track fits the game nicely, although you can not turn off the music. Data is easily reset if you want to go through it all again... it doesn't really matter, but whatever. There is level select, so once you beat a level if you do die you can go back... but you will never die.

All in all I have to say this was one of my favorite flash games of all time. I have no idea why, there is just something about jumping around in a simplistic world that just makes you love everything about it. You need to go play this game. Right now... and tomorrow I will tell you to play the sequel even more.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.5/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.1/5

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Flash Game Review: Raiden X

2010-07-07T01:56:00.000-04:00

X's are a great marketing scheme we can do to make something seem edgy or better than the competition! Kids these days like things that end in X! It's Xtreeeeee (too many e's)me!!!one! Raiden X is no different, this game is a tribute to the arcade originals... and it does hold true in a lot of aspects.

It has the insane, over-crowded, visually assaulting graphics. It has the techno beat soundtrack that you simply never want to end. It has WAY to many enemies, and bosses that die WAY to quickly. The Heat-seeking missiles are as overpowered as always... Oh some of you might not know what the original arcade based Raiden games are.

Well if you are part of that crowd, the original arcade Raiden games are a series (They made I and II really) that was hugely popular in arcades around at least North America. This arcade classic had teenagers dumping quarters in it by the metric ton. It was released originally in 1990, and then there were a few updates and new versions...

Game play in the original and this tribute are pretty simple. You are in control of man-kinds last defense. A super sonic jet fighter that destroys and annihilates everything in it's path. It gets upgrades during the course of the game to a max weapon/missile level. Once you achieve this level you just get points for the upgrades.

Specific to the game you will be playing tho, the ship can only take a single hit. This means avoiding things at all costs... and there are lots of things to avoid. It means you will find yourself holding down the Z key for damn near the entire game. But that's fine, accuracy and ammo don't really play much of a part in the Raiden games. Bombs however do play a pivotal role. The type of bomb you send out will be based on your current weapon type at the time. They are massively destruction one-click wonders that will destroy damn near everything on the screen. Saving these for boss fights only speed them up quite a bit. However take note that when your screen is full of baddies, sometimes it is worth dumping one just to make sure you don't lose a life.

Speaking of lives, this game gives you enough... when I played it on medium I was given 15 to start with. This number might seem absurd, but it isn't uncommon to lose them on a semi-regular basis. I mean my word I can go through 4 or 5 before you manage to score the max weapon upgrade setup... but don't worry once you do that nothing will even appear on the screen for a while, it is dead before that.

This game will push you to move fast, and keep your hands super twitchy. It really does deliver a feel very similar to the original. One of my few complaints is that there is only one type of ship to chose from, in the newer arcade version you have multiple options. However, this flash version does improve on some user friendly features. Firstly, it has a save feature that you can use at the end of each stage. And it has 5 separate files, this means that you can save a level in a different location if you lose a lot of lives and be able to go back. Also pressing the space button brings you to a full menu, giving you sound options as well as current game info. Furthermore, it allows you to change the graphical nature of the game from being high to low quality. This would allow for much nicer game play on a choppy system, something you won't know until in the game... perfect.

In the span of about 30 minutes you can get through a decent chunk of the game, even starting over once or twice. I was really pleased with this title overall, and would suggest it's twitchy nature to anyone. Also it might pull you back for more, just like the arcade.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.8/5

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Flash Game Review: N

2010-07-06T02:03:00.000-04:00

The way of the ninja... N. One of the most widely known and played Flash games I can think of, this baby has been around for a while. It is a staple of the flash game archives and required playing for just about everyone. This game manages to incorporate stunningly good physics with addictive game play that makes you want to keep coming back for more. Honestly, aside from today's 30 or so minutes, I have played this game for hours and hours back in highschool, it was the easiest way to kill time in class. But enough about the past, it is time to talk about N.

Users are in control of a ninja. Simple. A ninja on a quest to complete the entire series of stages that lie ahead of him. Each stage getting more and more difficult. And there is a time limit! Complete all 5 levels of each section in only 90 seconds total! However, don't worry to much about time, for as we all know ninja's love gold and nothing more. So make sure to collect the little golden squares along the way, they will increase the amount of time you can spend navigating each level. Also be prepared to hit space.

N is a game that is legendarily difficult. It has driven some of the best gamers mad with the sheer frustration of playing a level 30 or 40 times before finally mastering it. And then you find out that the next level is even harder.

The flash version that can be found online is a mere 30 stages of 5 levels. The version that can be downloaded found HERE spans 99 stages. It has been around since 2004, and with 2 million+ downloads, I encourage you to spend the time to beat the game... If you have a few months.

But onward! In each level there is a door that must be opened by triggering a switch, step into the door and the level is over. Sounds simple right? Well there can be a few barriers that need to come down first, these take additional time. There is only ever 1 screen tho, and it isn't that large. However you will also need to navigate your way around mines lasers rockets machine guns and more. N will keep your heart racing and brain working.

You always need another path to take, and planning in each level is essential to winning. You can't control the sound, there is no music. The controls can be modified from the main menu, and there is a help section. But trust me you will want to simply dive right in.

Overall N is probably hands down one of the simplest games, and one of the most complex at the same time. It reminds me of chess in that it can take 5 minutes to learn but a lifetime to master. Download this game, and find your way of the ninja.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 4.5/5

Overall: 3.9/5

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Flash Game Review: Warfare 1944

2010-07-03T04:17:00.000-04:00

Warfare 1944! A game that promises to be a fantastically interesting, and devilishly complex title by Con Artist Productions totally and utterly fails in every single way... yes, we found a flop. And this really is a surprise, the other titles I've review by Con Artist Productions and Armor games were simply fantastic. However where they succeeded with intrigue and creativity, this game simply... well... doesn't.

And yet you would think it does! When the game first loads you are presented with options, you can continue a campaign, have a custom battle, the options are fantastic. I can turn off music and sound effects separately (a feature I am big on, and the title music doesn't loop in some stupid fashion every 10 seconds or something. No this game seems perfectly good at the menu.

Even after that it seems that it will deliver a good time. The first time you play it, it suggests to watch the clever tutorial training video... This would suggest complex game play that requires explaining ahead of time, and can't just be figured out on the fly. Well as I am a guy, and it's in my nature never to read instructions, I just simply skipped over the fancy flash video and dove right in.

Now essentially, you can control either the German or American army in 1944, I took the Americans of course. The game is split up into several different missions that attempt some sort of familiarity to world war II, however there is very little if any correlation. There are units which you deploy on the tiny battlefield down 1 of 3 lanes in an attempt to win the map.

That's about it. There is some silly nonsense about upgrades or something, but it turns out you can complete the entire game without them. Granted I did this on the easiest difficulty, but I don't see the game getting anymore complicated then counting to 10.

You have reinforcement supply that allows you to send out troops, and these troops travel down their respective lane-way till they reach some sort of barrier. This could take the form of a hedge or a brick wall, but they are usually fairly evident.

Now depending on the type of unit it was, it will continue advancing, maybe take up position at the wall and provide cover fire, or launch mortars down the field. then after you've launched lots of units and managed to get to the end of the field and flank the enemy, their morale or something goes down... I don't really get that part, but if you do it enough you win so whatever.

That's it. If you manage to do it 9 times, I think, you complete the campaign and are rewarded with a newspaper headline and your stats.

It took all of like 18 minutes, and half way through I felt like just closing the browser because it was such a waste of time. So much more could have been down with this game. They could have had a complex system involving having to siege various sections of the countries, and then when you have certain territories you get more support in others. They could have had an upgrade system that is useful. Perhaps a computer that isn't so dull witted and basic. They could have done something useful.

However, they did not. I have to say all in all there isn't much more to say about this game. It wasn't that fun, I doubt I would recommend it to anyone anyway... in fact don't play this (if you already have, sorry for your loss), go here instead and play The Last Stand... a Con Artist game that I enjoyed.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.0/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 1.0/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 2.0/5

Overall: 2.4/5

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Flash Game Review: Amatuer Surgeon

2010-07-02T20:05:00.000-04:00

The most played game on Adult Swim, Amateur Surgeon is the future of Operation! The classic game... but now it has been revamped to include everything from a pizza cutter to a chainsaw. Users take the role of Alan Probe, a pizza delivery guy who accidentally runs into an ex-surgeon with a dark past. As the game progress' we find more and more about these two, and the old surgeon who is guiding Alan more so. The plot definitely adds a little something extra to this unique game.

Clients will simply walk in off the street to lay down on your tool table and be cut open, but don't worry it's all for the sake of the community. The game escalates in difficulty quite nicely, and it starts off explaining things very smoothly. There are many different tasks a surgeon must preform, from simply cutting open a patient, to difficult brain operations and organ transplant procedures. Alan (the user) manages to do all of these with nothing more than the common things you might find in the back of any pizza truck.

This game really is something else. Normally this quirky games are simplistic, and require little to no skill. Amateur Surgeon is different, gamers will regularly run out of time, or have to try the same operation multiple times to get the timing just right. Patients have pulse rate that must be monitored, as well as a specific amount of time available to complete the operation. The patient does die more quickly also depending on what activities you are doing to him... cutting into a ribcage with a chainsaw does take it's toll. Don't worry tho, Alan has a secret weapon. A corkscrew with pain relief gel will give the patient a surge of vitality and allow Alan a few more precious minutes to be able to close him up and send him on his way.

There is a VERY large variety of procedures, and you never now what you are going to have to deal with until you are in the middle of it. This requires fast thinking and a very steady hand. For example, when removing the ribcage if your cutting is even slightly off you will have to start all over, and if you don't move quickly enough the same will happen. The creator really makes you feel like a real surgeon, having to move quickly and confidently.

The game is organized into 3 Files and 1 secret file. I managed to get through the first file in good time, but then stopped for the sake of time. The game seperates each file into location, so by the 2nd file You are now located out of the back of a shop, and into the back of an alley. But don't worry everything that Alan and the good doctor do is perfectly sanitary.

This game would be wonderful to be used to train mouse coordination, as well as speed. Furthermore, this game has a grading system for how well each operation was done. Also the game has total operating time taken, as well as a total score accumulated. Not only can surgeries be repeated and improved,due to the shear size of the game, it has great repeat value. Games can be loaded so you don't need to start over each time you play. This is the kind of game that I will go back to later and beat over a few hours just because it is so challenging and entertaining.

The sounds are required to play, and I never even checked to see if you could disable them, obviously this means it isn't important for this game. Hands go down to the author for thinking of damn near everything in this game.

One final comment, the details make this game what it is. From the cartoon characters that don't take themselves to seriously, to the fine points of surgery. Something like if your patient's wounds are cauterized but not sealed for to long they re-open. Something as simple as that makes you have to focus that much harder and balance closing him up as well as cauterizing wounds. The more open sores the faster he dies, so both are critical.

Overall I have to say I was very pleased with this obscure title. It is very obvious as to why this game has over 50 million plays. I encourage you to try this game out, but don't try and beat it in one day. Come back to it each night and do 2 or 3 operations until it's finished, it is worth the time.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 3.55

Overall: 4.0/5

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Flash Game Review: The Last Stand 2

2010-06-30T17:26:00.002-04:00

Sometimes sequels are good, ie. Boondock Saints... sometimes they aren't so good... ie. Spider-man 2. However in the case of The Last Stand, it's sequel, The Last Stand 2, really doesn't deliver anything more than the first, but don't get me wrong it does try. The new version, also by Con Artist Productions and Armor Games incorporates a wide variety of new features, heck they even added music... which ruins it. Honestly the new features are the biggest part of what I am going to talk about, so if you are interested in the game play more so, take a look at the first one here.

So to refresh your memory, this game is essentially separated into two parts: killing zombies at night, and searching for people and weapons during the day. Well they haven't really changed anything when it comes to those two main parts, only made them slightly more developed and content rich.

When searching for example, you now have to chose which buildings to look in, and each building requires a different number of hours to search. Also you now gather supplies, these are used to move from location to location. That's right, you are no longer stuck in the same field waiting for an airlift from the army. Actually The Last Stand 2 picks up right where the first left off. The helicopter had an infected person, and went down. Now you have to escape all by yourself to Union City. What this means is going through the connecting cities along the way, battling zombies and getting more supplies.

There are a few problems with this system. What it means is that you no longer have to deal with 20 days and nights of terror. No, actually you can do it in far less. However the maker does give you a total of 40 days with which to complete your task... I managed to do it in 14, and I think I wasted 1 or 2 days. Another silly thing that occurs is, if you hunt for supplies and find some, then manage to get yourself eaten on a wave, you simply press restart and you keep the supplies you found. What this means for the average gamer is that this game has become downright easy street. It is almost impossible not to beat this game, I managed to do it in 16 minutes, and there is nothing after that.

They added a few other things as well. Music plays a small role, however now the fact that you can't change the sound really affects my views of it. They also added items you can find called traps. these traps get positioned before you start the wave in the field in front of your barricade. There are mines, bear traps and what look like propane tanks. Each has advantages and disadvantages, but the thing is they aren't required at all, and are simply content for the sake of content... always a silly thing to do.

A nice feature they added tho, and I was wondering why the first didn't have it, is the ability to select which gun your survivor buddies are holding. This means you can load on the heavy artillery on one side, and not have to worry so much about it. It adds a small amount to the game, and considering the amount this game has lost I really don't think it makes up for it.

I mean the original appeal to me of this game was the attention to detail. Things like the sun rising over the course of the night, the fact that there was no music and the eerie calm you got from it. The fact that it was actually a hard game, and you could simply get stuck on a level and never beat it. But this watered down sequel really does not do the original game justice, it might even be a waste of your time.

Overall I would say it isn't that bad, but I don't know if I'd really suggest you play it, if you like zombie games this is another victory to add on your wall of wins... that's about it.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.0/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.2/5

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Flash Game Review: The Last Stand

2010-06-29T21:16:00.000-04:00

The apocalypse has hit... zombies are infesting the world... you, your barricade, and the rag-tag team of survivors you've found are being rescued in 20 days... can you make it? The Last Stand by Con Artist Productions is a fantastic zombie game that, while VERY lightweight, is perfect for it's size, and delivers in some areas that make it just better. Sometimes in life it's the little things that matter, and flash games are no exception. The little production values are what really matter in this game, and The Last Stand really does bring them to the table. It has everything from journal entries as the days progress, to an amazing menu screen and a changing background as the night ticks on.

This is a zombie game we can all relate to. You are put in charge of the defense of a barricade, and using your sidearm and a few survivors, you must fend off 20 waves of oncoming zombies. In between waves tho you have daylight, and you had better make the most of those 12 hours if you are going to survive each night. You essentially have 3 functions that need to be balanced. Those include fixing the barricade, looking for better weapons, and finding more survivors.

To get you in the mindset of this game, they have done a few things I really like... firstly it should be said the only option you have is the quality of the graphics. There is no music... now normally I would be upset and angry that there is no options for music or sound. However this game is done perfectly, it really gets you in the somber mindset of slaying zombies. I mean unlike Blade 3, if the zombie apocalypse did come I doubt we would all be listening to our Ipods while slaughtering them.

So the idea is simple, the night time sections, where you shoot zombies, is relatively easy. I mean you just plug away and aim for the head. Yes see what I mean by the little things? Head shots in this game are very effective, and for the last wave you need them. There are different types of zombies, none are identified by name, but you can tell from appearence. And the soldier zombies have kevlar body armor or something. This means you really do need to aim for their heads, that or risk losing since it will tkae nearly a full clip to put only 1 down.

Now, this game is hard. And not the kind of hard that you manage to beat after two or three tries. This game is the kind of hard where you might not beat it. Ever. The reason is that if you don't balance the time you spend just right you will lose very early on.

I personally lost on wave 3 four or five times. The reason is you need to balance searching for weapons and for survivors very well early on. Essentially it boils down to, survivors are the life blood of your defense. You might have a shotgun, but that shotgun doesn't compare to having 5 or 6 people shooting in addition to you.

Overall this game has no replay value, but you will want to beat it to see the ending, I'd recommend it.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 4.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.6/5

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Flash Game Review: Robokill

2010-06-28T23:05:00.000-04:00

I felt like it was back in 2002 playing Diablo 2, there was objectives, a store, a map, even way points! Robokill really brings a lot of elements to the flash gaming platform, combined with pristine graphics, the game simply shines.
The company called Rock Solid Games, who's arcade can be found here, really did step up with this title. It is a combination top down run and gun style shooter, that has some elements from GTA2. It also combines RPG elements such as level's experience and various weapons.

The objectives in the game are fairly easy, and quite similar to each other. You enter a room, and in this room you use the robot of death that you control to obliterate everything. At this point you say, oh great it's another one of "Those" games... you know the kind, where you just hold left click until you win. Well for some parts of the game you are right, however for others, simple run and gun tactics will absolutely NOT work.

I consider myself a pretty avid gamer. I play something for most of my day, be it the latest PC game I am into, an old favorite, or a flash game I am trying out to review it later. Well To be quite honest, this game tore me to shreds. a particular section I died maybe 8 or 9 times on one level before I could beat it. Granted this is still a rare thing even in this game, it should be said don't just run.

To start with there are a variety of enemies in each room to clear. Most have combinations of fast shooting tough robots mixed with tiny ones that try and suicide on you. There are a variety of turrets as well, and in some levels machines exist which spawn robots periodically. Those machines are the focus of one level in the first mission; destroying the factories is essential.

Speaking of levels and missions, this game is organized very well and in multiple stages...

I'm going to stop hear and give you some warning. There are 4 missions, and a total of 13 levels... I think. However after the first mission a little box pops up asking you to buy the rest of the game. Now I am a broke university student like the rest of us, so I definitely did not purchase this game, but let me tell you that you are probably better off going and buying a full scale game. I love flash games, but I do not think that their individual use should have to be payed for.

Moving on, there are 4 missions, each with it's only collection of stages. Now each level can be though of as a shift up in difficulty. Enemies will take more damage to kill, there will start being more and more of them. Level's themselves will get larger and larger. By that token, this game also has some similarities to and old school Zelda game. The reason is for the map design with rooms is extremely close to the one they used back on the NES. I really do favor this style, and it works quite well for the team that made Robokill. But every now and again you will come to a room that has a teleport pad in it. This will allow you to teleport back to your base of operations.

At this base there is a shop that will sell you a variety of upgrades to your little robo killer. These upgrades are interchangeable and can be described as either a weapon or an upgrade. You have to be a high enough level to be able to use an item, levels are gained as you progress through the game. There are a total of 4 slots for weapons, and 4 for upgrades.

Weapons range from slow firing shotguns and grenades launchers, to a variety of high speed rifles. There are also individual modifications that can occur on each weapon. This can be a combination of upgrades for a rare item, or just 1 upgrade for an uncommon weapon. Effects include knockback, freezing and even things as odd as bullet speed. There are good parts to each, and often a combination is best seeing as you have four slots.

Now as far as upgrades go I would only suggest 1 type. It is called a shield charger, and it is your friend. This will charge your shields slightly after each room that you clear. The advantage here is that some rooms are easy and so you can build back up your shields for those tougher levels.

Controls are good, with Q bringing up your inventory/character screen, and E bringing up the map. These are the perfect keys considering you should be using WASD to be moving.

However should you die you will be sent back in the direction of your base of operations with the store. And due to you being absent from the field of combat, a number of rooms will have been taken back over by the invading robots. Also you will have lost a certain amount of money, money you need for valuable weapon upgrades.

As far as everything else is concerned, sound and music are great. However they could be easier to disable from somewhere in the game itself. There are two different graphics settings; most computers can handle high, however if it is slow for you feel free to switch. The computer plays intelligently sometimes, and realistically the game puts out everything you could hope for from a game of this style.

There isn't much room for longevity since once you have beaten a level there is no point in going back to that level. however you will probably push yourself to finish this game... or at least the free part. But don't think you will do it in 30 minutes or under... By the 30 minute mark I was just starting the 3rd level, which is almost as large as the first 2 combined. It took me nearly 1:15 to beat this game.

Normally I stop at the 30 minute mark, which is exactly what I did... but then the game called to me in the middle of writing this and I just had to go and finish the parts that I could, even after I died numerous times.

Overall this is a fantastic game, exactly what a modern flash title should look and play like. The only things that bother me are the sound controls, as well as the fact that they don't tell you ahead of time you need to buy it.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.7/5
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Flash Game Review: IndestructoTank!

2010-06-27T22:05:00.000-04:00

A great little game for the average player, IndestructoTank! by The-EXP is a very low commitment game. By that I mean it won't suck you in for hours, and is easy to go back to. There isn't much to this little game. It actually reminds me a touch of the classic hit Dolphin Olympics 2. It is a game in which users control an indestructible tank, and the idea is to chain together combinations by hitting various planes that drop bombs. Sound simple? well that's because it really is. There aren't many controls, only needing the left and right arrows to play. Your goal is to get enough exp to reach the next level before your fuel (time) runs out. Each time you do reach a new level you will be given some options, as well as a refueling.

These options don't contribute that much to the game, however they do make it a touch easier to reach the final stage. The options involve which planes show up more frequently. There are a total of 5 types of planes including the default type. These 4 new types will each do something different so there is a touch of variety. However that is where it ends. There isn't much to the game, you simply rebound off planes and try to not hit the ground while doing so. The music gets very repetitive, and so does the game play.

As far as the quality of the game, the graphics are sub-par for today's games, and the music can't get turned off. There is of course a high score board, but I doubt anyone cares enough to get high up on it. I mean don't get me wrong, I beat the game... it's in my nature to beat everything I play.

And how do you beat a game like this you say? well all you need to do is max out the frequency of each plane. Once that is accomplished the games considers you a winner and rewards you with some congratulations and a special mode. The special mode of course is exactly more of what yyou have been doing the entire time.

You no longer has fuel, you can go for an unlimited period of time, and of course the goal is to get a super high score... that no one cares about.

Overall, once again, this game will beg you to beat it in 20 minutes.. and then never ever ever ever speak of it again. I'd suggest turning on some music before you play this...

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 2.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.0/5

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Flash Game Review: Trap Master

2010-06-27T02:08:00.000-04:00

Sometimes the bad guys just want to cause the end of the world... why can't we fight for them sometimes? Well in Trap Master by Berserk Studio you can! That's right, you are put in control of a vile and simply evil monster in his lair, protecting his doom chest.

I have to say I really was quite pleased with this game. To be perfectly honest the second it loaded up, within the first 15 seconds I remember hearing myself say, "oh yes this is gonna be awesome". However all good things must come to an end. And dear readers, they absolutely did.

You see, you can create the greatest flash game known to man kind. You can fill it with amazing wonders and addiction, and an awe inspiring sound track that makes Lord of the Rings sound like an bad highschool band. You can get the newest graphics and smoothest effects...

But none of that matters at all if on the 6th level it glitches out and is broken forever. Even after restarting the game it just wouldn't work properly anymore... sadly it was turning out to be VERY VERY highly addictive, until I broke it or something.

So I will give my review the best I can, and hope that when you play it it works for you, but it will never work for me again.

Users are put in control of a monster who has to guard his Doom Chest... one can only assume it will cause all sorts of destruction all over the earth. Warning however, for the chest is not safe. What must be the nearby villagers know of your lair's whereabouts and have come to destroy the chest.. don't worry about yourself they never attack you.

And alas! there would be far to many of them for you to defeat on your own little monster... so have no fear the traps are here! That is right this game takes no only the first player element of running around gobbling down men with pitch forks, it also is a strategy game!

After each wave of little men, you get to use your awarded cash to spend on traps to enhance your lair. This traps are subdivided into two categories, Contraptions and Devices. Contraptions are things that will last the duration of the game. They are very much permanent, so careful placement is essential to winning. Also they can be upgraded, and any hardcore gamer will tell you, always get the upgrades. Devices are more temporary. They can range from blocks that obstruct the path of villagers until they get destroyed, to exploding ladders and bridges. Both categories are highly suggested to make game play easier. Furthermore you can upgrade your monster giving it better killing attributes, or your Doom Chest, giving it more health and healing it.

I have to say, this game has a HUGE amount of depth to it. From key placement of traps, to monitoring your mini-map and watching when catapults are coming. Replay value on this game must be enormous due to the fact that there is more than one type of monster to chose from. And in addition there are achievements and two separate difficulties.

Now for the part I like best... The sound was amazing, this games sound track had me on the edge of my seat. And the effects were just as good, especially the gobbling sound as you ingest a nasty little pitch fork man. All of these setting and more are controlled via the menu, also easy to get to.

There is an auto save option that is handy, and there is a meter showing you how much longer the wave has till it ends.

Even boss waves are present in this game, simply again showing the kind of depth that it has to it. I honestly can say I was VERY pleased with the game.

Well... the game that I got to play, which again was HIGHLY limited. So as far as playability, well it is very simple. However, it might glitch out on your and ruin the experience... I hope it doesn't tho. Let me know how it goes for ya... ...I did some more poking around and the version I now link to might work a bit better for you.

I ended up playing through the entire game... after level 18 or so it becomes a cake walk.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 4.5/5
Simplicity: 2.5/5

Overall: 3.8/5
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Flash Game Review: Age of War 2

2010-06-26T00:05:00.000-04:00

Since yesterday I decided to do the "best" game on addicting games, today I did the highest rated ever... and I have to say, much much better. Age of War 2, by Max Games is worthy of its highest rated status as a flash game. It is a fantastic little title that does a few things quite well, and of course a few things terribly poorly.

First to the game. Users are in control I suppose of a "tower" and are facing an enemy... there is only one view, and you can see the entire battlefield by scrolling to the right using your mouse cursor... that's right this game is mouse friendly, meaning no keyboard required. The objective is to destroy the computers tower before it manages to destroy yours. This is accomplished by building units for assaulting your enemy, towers and turrets for defense. There are also more features that will be discussed that add to the definite complexity of the game.

First tho, a word on the various "difficulty" settings... This does not by any means increase the intelligence of the AI. All it does is give the computer more gold and XP at a faster rate than you aquire it. It reminds me ALOT of old school computer games where to make the computer harder they would simply give it an unfair advantage.

What do I mean by gold and XP? well as the game progress's both aer important to keep track of. Gold is what allows you to build offensive units as well as upgrade unit types for better use of funds when building them.

Next, XP gets used in two fashions. Firstly it can be used to rain destruction down on the battle field with a special attack. This attack will devastate the field and wipe out all enemy combatants. The more critical function however is advancing through the ages, a little bit like a civilization game. That said, there are very few, to nil opportunities to actually use the special because advancing is so critical.

The graphics in this game are about as good as you would expect, sound isn't terrible and it is easy to turn it off and on. Also there are more detailed controls for quality and even frame rate. This game can eat a lot of your computer power so turning it down might help on a slower machine.

Aside from that, once you master the concept of which of the 4 units to build and when and in what order the game becomes another title that will bore you. This effectively gives it very little replay value since the same ideas will work on each difficulty setting, with some minor tweaking.

Also if you seem to be having difficulty, try and keep gold and XP on hand... this will mean if the computer uses it's special to wipe your field, you don't instantly lose... and who makes turrets anyway...

Overall this game is a great use of time.. beat it on easy then on hard and then never play it again.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.2/5 Share

Flash Game Review: Potty Racers 2

2010-06-24T21:01:00.000-04:00

Potty Racers 2 is the current "hottest" game on Addicting Games... but I have to say, I was not to pleased with the latest release by Gonzo Games... If you ever played the original Potty Racers you will notice that the games are virtually identical, the only small differences being what your urinal car looks like...

However, considering this could be the first time someone has played it lets look at it from that perspective. If we do, we see a game who's objective is to travel a certain distance to complete each level, doing so by holding down the right arrow key, and once the craft leaves a ramp, using fuel.

That's really it... Rinse, repeat, and finish.

This game could have had so much more done with it to enhance the experience... choosing different types of vehicles for climates, or having to do certain tricks.. or traveling a distance while under a ceiling... so many options.

NONE of which exist in this title.

Not only that, a few of the features are implemented in terrible ways. Firstly the only way to turn the sound off is during the actual game play not from a menu. Also it doesn't actually disable all the sound, just the stupid music that plays all the time.

I suppose something they implemented that is good enough is the actual control of the racer. When you burn fuel with an engine, the direction the front of your car is facing really does matter. To high and you won't get enough distance to clear the gap, and to low and you won't go high enough.

However this really doesn't matter... you see the game lacks any concept of difficulty once you understand the trick.

Don't max your thruster... you have a capped top speed, and once you find it simply tap the thruster to keep yourself below that speed but not below 50% of it... tada you just won.

And the ending is just sad. Get lots of money do some tricks and here have a nice picture! I mean add something for the love of god... however I did appreciate that you can see Goku and Superman... atleast I think it was them.

All in all... play this game, beat it in about 12 minutes... then go find something better.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.0/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 2.5/5
Sound: 2.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 2.7/5

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Flash Game Review: wpnFire

2010-06-23T23:09:00.000-04:00

Another day another zombie game it seems... But this one has the perfect amount of controlled chaos and shear violence to keep anyone enthralled for a brief 30 minutes. wpnFire by the guys over at Stick Page really does take the zombie killing weapon wielding stick figure mayhem to another level. With their AMAZING graphical work, and beautiful sound track this game is about as good as they get.

Gamers are set to navigate a stick warrior through the few levels battling zombies and knights. That's right... god damn knights. The graphical work is just amazingly brilliant for a flash game of this size, including even motion blurs and camera shaking as you unload a barrage of fire on unsuspecting villains. There are a few modes to chose from, all of which I would encourage sampling, but first use the training level to get used to the controls... which are easy anyway.

Also, a great feature, fully customizable control setup, and you can make those changes during game play. Speaking of game play, if you are to die you don't restart the entire game. Just a quick restart at each level and you are off again, this makes learning to beat the games two bosses rather enjoyable. No more spending 15 minutes to get to the boss each and every time before you find that trick to let you win. And win you should, considering I beat this games main mode in about 12 minutes. The trick is balancing aggression against the enemies with guns compared to accurate shooting and precision jumps. There is a kick you can do... but it is a touch stupid compared to unloading your pistol into some zombie skull. But don't bother aiming for the headshot... it doesn't do anything.

The other modes are similar, being survival style modes where you are looking to clear as many levels as possible. One mode is against knights, the other zombies, and finally against both. I will say this... the zombie level is absurdly easy to get really far in. The knight mode... is not. It requires REALLY fast mouse work, and well timed jumps to keep you alive. There are some cheats as well, but who the hell uses those.

This game is yet another great example of why stick figures do it best. I am absolutely glad to have found this gem, and hope everyone gets as much out of it as I did. All in all, this game is highly addictive; and with over 10 million plays, it is hardly a surprise.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.5/5
Sound: 5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.4/5
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Flash Game Review: Last Airbender: Elemental Battles

2010-06-22T22:08:00.000-04:00

I actually spent more time thinking up a witty tag line for this game than playing it... and I couldn't. So the brunt of it is that this game is trash. Last Airbender: Elemental Battles is, I would assume, based on the upcoming movie, or maybe it was released.. who knows it really doesn't make any difference. If there was one thing we learned about bad American-made movies ripping off good anime it was Dragonball... and that was just a travesty. Now imagine that they made a terrible flash game promoting that terrible movie based off of something not from North America... YOU HAVE IT! That's this game.

Where to begin... ok well firstly you don't want to play this game because you might take a few months off your mouse. Essentially you don't even need your "powers" which are the exact same power but with a slightly different animation. You don't need timing, or good skill... you just spam left click and win. The level construction makes no real sense, with 2 obstacles: ropes and not ropes (aka the ground). There are a whopping FIVE levels to get through. But don't worry the 28 second sound clip that plays the entire way through is nice to listen to.

Physics? Who needs those! lets just slap on a hollywood name plate and SURELY it will do something useful! Actually, it doesn't. This game has seriously turned me off what could have been maybe a decent action movie, with cool effects. Well forget that.

You can't disable the stupid music either, there are no REAL save points. If you run out of lives, you start over again. There is no score, there are 2 baddies (generic, and last boss), and even the instructions suck.

However I did force myself to play this game until the end, and then had some fun with it. You can cause major glitches to the game if you use your right click and select the play option, and fool around. You start moving aroun at fifty times the speed of light, and you sound like Bugs Bunny on coke. After restarting and fixing the glitches, you then can spend goodtimes collecting baddies under ropes(no they can't jump up if you're on it, or cut you...

I can see the dialogue during the fight, "DAMN! We are in Flat world! WHERE DID HE GO! I SWEAR HE WAS JUST HERE BOB!". No they can't just look up, that would be to challenging... these are union fighters!

All in all this game was totally trash, really the ONE feature I liked was that if you bring a different window into focus it auto pauses the game... that's about it.Share

Flash Game Review: Isoball 2

2010-06-22T02:31:00.000-04:00

A new dimension in puzzling entertainment. Isoball 2 tries to incorporate the Isometric plane to is rolling mayhem... it sorta works. However the dilemma is that this release really gets confusing sometimes, but if you are looking for a small stripped down puzzler, look no further.

Essentially users are tasked with the objective of creating a path for a ball to travel from somewhere into a hole. This is done in a fashion that is reminiscent of lemmings (a great game that can be found here), but it has a slight twist. This addicting flash game works in an isometric environment. To those new to video gaming, isometrics was first popularized with a game called Runescape. This is the classic version, but essentially the idea is that the game isn't actually in 3D however it pulls off the look by using certain geometric shapes.

If that just confused you it doesn't really matter, the game is fairly easy to pickup, and each individual level goes by rather quickly. Gamers use customized pieces to build a path for the little ball to travel down; the farther the player progressive the more pieces usually available. What this means is tutorials were crafted to explain how to use each piece.

This is a small but fantastic feature in this title. The tutorials are actual gameplay that is simply scripted, this really helps with figuring out how everything works. Sometimes you need to be pretty damn creative, like sending the ball down and than up to kill time. Each level is giving a point total for the amount of time you use to build the track, but just getting through some is the challenge. I got roughly 35 levels in inside the allotted 30 minutes. But then again I am a professional =D.

But even with my skill level, we see the problem with Isometric games. You see this one takes it a bit farther, and because the game has a gravity type feel with the ball not being able to "fall" or it breaks, we feel like it is gravity. However this creates the sensation of each level having a theoretical bottom which would control the balls travel.

But this is wrong.

Since this feeling happens, levels such as this one can look perfectly finished, but then you realize that the ball and ramp don't line up. Even tho you feel the ball can fall down and it's on the ramp, it actually isn't and so the flaw is exposed.

Overall tho I don't mind the game. It does have some good and difficult puzzles, and the author went through with a good amount of creativity. Also the ability to mute the game from anywhere in it at anytime is REALLY nice. Selecting blocks and rotating them is fairly simple to do, however I found that sometimes I thought I was on a block but I wasn't. Also there is an erase tool and a clear tool, both of which will get ample use.

Overall I have to say ,while a few things bothered me, Isoball 2 definitely delivers the lightweight puzzler sensation that we all enjoy; also with 50 levels and a sandbox mode there is some room to keep playing.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.5/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.4/5

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Flash Game Review: Bazooki

2010-06-21T01:08:00.001-04:00

Another balloon clearing style addicting flash game, Bazooki by FlashChaz brings something extra to the plate. Instead of random luck, this game requires a high level of precision. Users are put in charge of a rather simple task: destroy all the... well I am not quite sure what they are, but it says bomb disposal on the side of your truck so clearly they must be that. The game actually has some cute video at the start that has a touch of back story for kicks. Great animation and great sound effects are all a part of this game. It never gets old, and the animations are clean crisp and good looking, obviously done intentionally. To start the levels are fairly easy as gamers get used to the controls and physics. There are a few special features that make this game great. from bounce platforms and triple shots to guided missiles and portals.

I found tho that the pace of this game is good. No long load times, no having to wait for anything really. The menu system is precisely how you would want it to be, and there is a time recorded for each level. Yes the author put a seperate page in the menu so you can view level times and trophies. A perfect idea.

As far as game play goes, a high degree of accuracy and a touch of skill is essential. Some games of this style can be boring and repetitive, but the author here has gone to great length to ensure that this is not the case. Creative level designs and VERY limited ammo help.

When I say limited I mean it.

Most levels (all?) can only be completed to the single shot. This means that you can't make a single mistake in any of the levels otherwise you have to restart. But don't worry to much, the most difficult levels will only required 3-5 skill shots. But it can still be incredibly infuriating to reach that last shot and miss... part of what makes this a great game. Each level is completed in about 15 seconds, however it can take 4 or 5 minutes before you finish it. This game is perfect to kill a 30 minute lunch break.

The sound is fully controllable from the menu, which can be accessed anytime. It has individual controls for SFX and music, however I would have liked seeing a global mute somewhere during game play, but I am picky.

Overall I was rather impressed with our return game, it was quite satisfying, and while the 24 levels aren't mind-numbingly addicting, they do help take the edge off a day.

Rating:

Longevity: 2.5/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 4.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.7/5

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Flash Game Review: Robot Unicorn Attack

2010-03-04T03:20:00.004-05:00

If you ever doubted that those 3 words would be strung together into one sentence, let your doubts be shattered like you will shatter stars in the epic minimalist title by Adult Swim.

Robot Unicorn Attack is awesome. I'm just going to start off by saying that. I mean I heard about this game from a friend, and normally those prove to be pretty good leads, the conversation went like this.

"Hey man, are you hooked on the latest game, Robot Unicorn Attack?"-him
"No never heard of it."-me
"It's this crazy flash game, you have to check it out... and you will love the music."-him

Those sorts of conversations are the things that make me keep doing this blog every single day. Let me tell you this game will not disappoint. It is of the genre that is sometimes called minimalist games, where you do as little as possible and the game takes everything else into its hands.

Essentially from the title we can assume several things. You are a unicorn bent on total annihilation of this world called... well lets call it 'Dream Land'. And in dream land, as a deadly killer robot unicorn... similar to The Terminator... it is our mission to have a strong a 'Wish' as possible. In fact we get three wishes, and the strength (score) of each is summed up to give us our final. I personally would like to think this is the amount of death and destruction we have caused, since if I was a Robot Unicorn, that would be my mission in life.

Essentially, the game plays like one of those helicopter games, where you are constantly moving in 1 direction, with no control over how fast you travel and all you can decide to do is jump or attack.

Z is jump and X is attack. These are the only controls you need.

You start off relatively slowly, and score is collected in 3 different manors. The first is simply the longer you travel the higher your score based solely on time. And of course the longer the time the faster the randomly pieced together level moves. Eventually it gets to such a pace that you actually have to get lucky to land some jumps. The second way to accumulate death and destruction points is by collecting fairy thingies... we don't really know what they are, but since we are a Unicorn we will address them as fairies... Seems appropriate. The third way is the most rewarding and most interesting.

Crash through Statically placed stars for huge points. You see the points on cumulative so you start off getting 100 for a star then 200 then 300... and you can do the math. However if you miss a star and happen to go over it, then your cumulative score will reset back to 100 for the next star.

Hint: Don't miss a star.

The physics, as simple as they are, allow for some interesting button glitching. Jumping while in an attack can actually get you over some ledges if you are going to hit them, so just always jump. Actually, you can double jump by pressing Z again while in the air, and if you attack, you can then jump once more. This leads to a scenario where you can actually stay air-born the entire game if you wanted to. I advise you to look out for low hanging walls, as they will obliterate you instantly. Also, don't miss a jump because the only thing that happens when you fall down a hole in wish land is you go back to reality, and logically since Robot Unicorns can't exist in reality, you die.

The music, oh the music. I don't think there is a way to disable it, but who cares. This stuff is so laid back and relaxing that it fits perfectly... if you imagine you are ravaging the hopes and dreams of all the world as a deadly robot unicorn on the attack.

I really have to say I was pleased with this game, it's a good waste of time, I just didn't like the fact that the website required me to register to get access to the high scores... I don't like registering...

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.8/5

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Flash Game Review: Dragon Boy

2010-03-03T20:29:00.001-05:00

My word, if you are looking for a small and short RPG style game that can turn into the thing that eats your entire afternoon, then Dragon Boy is for you... this thing can get so long, I doubt I would EVER finish it.

This review will encompass more then just the game play or the graphics. Here I will try and break down both how to play the game, as well as a few tips I have, and the point at which you should just stop playing the game because it gets ridiculous.

I suppose to start my general feeling with game would be one that is pretty good. Overall the game delivers a touch of graphics with a smidgen of creativity, and enough ripped audio to actually make me think I was playing Diablo 2...

That's right people, the only thing my first impression told me after 30 seconds was... wtf Diablo 2 ?!?1!?¿¿!one!?

This game sounds like it is trying to emulate Diablo 2, with the sound effects and the portal to each level, the shop; buying and selling from... At least I didn't see a boss named Andariel...

Anyway, the game is fairly self descriptive in how it works, but briefly it goes something like this: You are a warrior in a kingdom plagued by monsters and bandits (aren't they always evil), however this time with a twist. You, being a 'Dragon Boy' have to raise a pet dragon from the time it is a small egg, up until the time it hatches, and, well ... deals more damage and is way more bad-ass then you ever will be.

You also have another member in your 'party' who of course is a Mage of some sorts... well the character casts stuff so I think it was a Mage.

To be quite honest, I skipped past nearly the entire tutorial, it was WAY to long for my taste, but if you are looking for lots of information that's the place to be.

So essentially the game is broken down into 2 main sections, combat and shopping.

You first begin in a small circular city, with the walled in structure telling you something else is to be done besides run in a circle because you are amused at the fact that the game can combine both x and y axis movement to get a multi-axis vector! (Yeah I can use big words when the time suits) Once you discover you need to click the carpet you will soon find yourself clicking, and teleporting to the second section, combat.

This is primarily where you will spend all of your time, beating the baddies, slaying the innocent, and ... basically grinding for those nasty bosses you can't beat. This flash game ACTUALLY HAS A GRINDING ELEMENT, it isn't just the same action repeated over and over again, wait, that's what grinding is...

Your main hero upgrades when you gain a level, or can afford new equipment from the shop owner who CLEARLY doesn't understand we are in a depression, like, jeez. You regain health instantly when you finish a stage as far as I can tell, and the stages aren't very long.

Each battle area is subdivided depending on the level. They are essentially all the same, with the monsters being different, some are really easy some are really hard. Different stages required different approaches, be it just tank the boss, or let your insane area of effect (AOE) damage from your party help you destroy things REALLY fast.

You only really gain stats from items and levels, but your caster is a different story.

Firstly, all of their abilities are on auto cast, so you never need to worry about clicking another button. When you gain a level you have the option of leveling certain caster abilities ranging from an overall improvement on the spell abilities, to the individual spells themselves. To run them down quickly, there is an AOE nova ability (ripped straight from Diablo 2) a freeze, a weird orb thing that does damage, a heal, and then the general improvement. I would say leveling the AOE at the start proves the best, but closer towards the end of the game maxing the freeze and the heal become to most important.

The last of your party, a dragon egg, seems useless at first; and well it simply is. This little thing bounces around behind you and doesn't do anything. However it is your job to grow it, and the method in which you do that is simpler then raising a Tamagotchi. All you need to do is feed the little guy some type of plants... or any item that has a 'grow' stat included in the description. This will beef up your dragon who not only ends up having a nice melee attack, but also AOE splash damage for those huge waves of monsters later.

Eventually, after all the monsters have been destroyed you discover (quite naturally of course) that the king is the one who has become evil and must now be destroyed. This is a grueling stage in which much grinding is required before hand.

Actually to be truthful, the game had to glitch slightly before I could beat the final boss, it really is that tough.

Speaking of glitches, lets move on to the mechanics. The game is fairly smooth, however I would highly suggest reducing the overall quality simply by hitting the 'Q' button on your keyboard. Some levels later on have so much going on that you will notice the frames just drop off, and the game will give you some serious lag. Second, while the attack engine is decent, the game itself has a few minor glitches. Nothing major to mention, however if some enemies are off screen, they won't see you but your dragon can still attack them... that was my solution to the final boss. Also if your party is far away, and you pause and wait they will eventually appear next to you even tho the enemies did not continue moving towards you.

Now if you do manage to beat the final boss, caution, your game is not over. If anything the game only begins at this point. You enter into what is called 'hard mode'. This mode is essentially ever previous level, but like 10x harder.

The thing is, it isn't really harder at all. You see by now your heal ability is so high that you can heal through most fights, or you just learn to run around until you are full health, and if your caster dies don't worry you will continue getting healed. What this means practically is that you should win every fight given enough time.

Well this is when I quit. I don't enjoy that model of gaming very much so I just quit...

Now the game has a lot of built in functionality including an auto save menu, as well as several options for disabling music and changing quality.

Overall I was pleased with the experience, and would recommend everyone play through till the end... but hard mode is a waste of time.

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.5/5

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Flash Game Review: Bloons

2010-03-01T10:00:00.001-05:00

It's Bloons!!! This game is absurdly great, you will find yourself addicted to the complex nature that is popping balloons with darts. It is highly challenging to get through all 50 levels without just flipping on Unlimited Darts Mode and spamming...

This game combines A LOT of skill with a bit of luck, and some chaos. Bloons by: Ninja Kiwi Games really is the pinnacle of this type of game.

I am not sure what to classify it under, but we will call it puzzle just because, well, each level it its own little puzzle in itself. The game introduces A LOT of elements to it. Including a wide variety of special balloons that each serve unique functions. With 50 levels of game play this puzzler will keep you served for a long time.

The game is pretty user friendly, the 'How to Play' section is kept to 1 page, and the game really takes off quite fast. It starts relatively simply, shoot some balloons with a limited number of darts and move on the next level. But as the number of darts gets closer and closer to the smallest number possible, and as the game introduces more and more elements it gets fairly challenging. The hardest part is not just trying to shoot random darts to win. You can't, it doesn't work like that.

Careful planning, and taking note of all special elements in the level is the critical focus. These unique balloons can range from Ice balloons that will freeze balloons around it, making them unpoppable. Or even a Pac-man balloon that temporarily turns your dart into the memorable character from our arcade loving past. Control Pac-man with the arrow keys when the time comes.

The sounds take a bit of a back seat considering there is no way to disable or even turn them down, which started to get annoying once you reach later levels.

Especially level 50. With 250 balloons and the entire thing being set off with a giant chain reaction, you will really want to mute the sound for that one... In fact it is so bloated with effects your browser might crash... Mine did.

However, hands down the best features of this game are two important elements.

1. The fact that you don't need to pop every balloon on most levels. Moreover, this is a useful feature because it means some levels can have multiple approaches, or ones that look promising only to fail and make you search else where.

2. The aptly named 'Unlimited Dart Mode'. This mode will let you continue with your game having a limitless supply of darts. Now while this is cheating, the real help is being able to learn how to beat each level while not having to restart each level.

I have to say, besides the sound, and the lack of a 'Score', this game really does seem to be the crowning victor for its category... Puzzle shooty thingies.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.6/5

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Flash Game Review: An Agent of Change

2010-02-28T13:33:00.002-05:00

A helicopter, a man and a submarine, your alien entity must occupy and morph regularly between each of these states... It must be brutal to find a wardrobe to keep up, and when if is all said and done, in no way will you want to play again.

An Agent of Change is another run-of-the-mill flash game, with nothing special to offer, and no real redeeming qualities. The idea for the game is quite clever, but it is pulled off in a simplistic way, and is far to easy. This game has a challenge level of roughly 0. The 6 stages with 4 or so levels each took me roughly 15 minutes to work through, and I would have played more... but that's it, the game is over.

Users are put in control of an alien that has crash landed on earth, and must run around a few levels and collect the parts to his ship in order to flee this planet, and we can assume return home.

There are is 1 enemy, a little green dude that walks around on a couple levels that is more or less a joke. On some levels there are cannonballs... again, a joke. Most stages contain some sort of impassable terrain in certain forms, which means you must use the transfiguration areas to get passed it.

By transfiguration, I mean little round things that morph you into either a helicopter or a submarine. Don't worry tho, both use the exact same physics and both are equally as bad. Like really, this game is as obvious as Tetris... actually that's mean, Tetris requires a bit of skill... This game is just dumb.

Once you collect the part in the level, or if there is no part, once you get the door you press the up arrow and the level is over.

The sound in this game isn't as terrible as I would think, but it really doesn't do anything special. I did like the music, but again no sound effects, so really the only thing to listen to is the music.

Once you beat this game, which even the worst gamer could do, you click a button, and your space ship launches and congratulations you have won... Then the game does something REALLY dumb.

You don't get a score, you don't get a 'good' cut scene, you don't even get like a re-direct to the owners site.

You get the option to Play Again... Why the hell would I want to play as linear and simplistic of a game after I had just beaten it.? What purpose does that serve? Can I improve somehow? Maybe if the creators had given us something to work towards besides completion there would be some inspiration to go back and better my score or something... but no, there isn't

Overall I have to say I am VERY disappointed... and normally games with 'old school graphics' are very good. Not this one.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.5/5
Interface: 3.0/5
Addictiveness: 1.0/5
Sound: 2.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 2.2/5

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Flash Game Review: Man Hunter

2010-02-27T10:00:00.002-05:00

30 Days. The most difficult prey you can ever find. The most dangerous game you will ever play. To be the hunter, in Man vs Man... and to enjoy it. That is today's game.

Man Hunter by:Iron Zilla is one of those games you question whether it is 'right' or not... but at the end of the day, you are still just shooting things based on a skill system, that requires good reactions, and a high degree of understanding when it comes to prey.

Thats right, you are put in control of a hunter, a hunter in search of the perfect prey... a human of course, what else could be more difficult to hunt. This is the true 'ultimate sport' and as such, it is the true flash game. In reality the game principles on normal play are quite simple.

In 30 hunting days, you have to collect the highest number of points possible. This is done through endless mowing down of humans, high degrees of accuracy and good percentages.

Gamers start with almost zero cash, and have to begin the hunt immediately. You get no bait to start with, and have nothing more then a dagger to hunt with. However as the game progress' this becomes more powerful firearms, and more ammunition.

Different types of human prey are available, ranging from the Olympic runner to the steroid enhance bodybuilder. Stages are chosen at random during the equipment upgrade screen where you can purchase better weapons, more attractive bait, or better upgrades for your end result. The points matter in this one, and that is what will determine your overall score.

Addictiveness isn't too high, once you know how to hunt all th prey it becomes a tad repetitive, and if you ever enter 'Endless Mode' you will hate your life.

Essentially, you just hunt people with no care about accuracy or wasted bullets, or game missed in certain stages.

All in all I would recommend 'Man Hunter' as a great deterrent from everyday life, and an excellent way to waste the 30 minutes you dedicate to this website. However, the simplest features, like disabling sound are lacking... So I can't credit it that well...

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 2.5/5
Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.2/5

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Flash Game Review: Demolition City 2

2010-02-26T10:00:00.002-05:00

I was harmlessly browsing the flash game sites, trying to find SOMETHING that would catch my eye, when I started playing a few levels of Demolition City, I knew after 10 or 15 minutes I had found the perfect game...

This one definitely falls into the category of driving you to beat it, created by: Joey Betz, you really feel the urge to beat this game and see the ending.

And the great part is YOU CAN ACTUALLY BEAT IT!

Yes dear readers, you can actually finish this game in around 30 minutes, which in by humble (yeah right) opinion make it a great flash game.

These games are not meant to replace our PC games... simply serve as a brief interlude to that assignment you are working on... or project for your boss... or deter you from sleep, nothing more.

I can say for certain Demolition City deterred me from my sleep. The game play is fairly simple, and I don't even know if there are instructions... who reads those anyway? The premise is fairly simple, and similar to the Crush The Castle style of game play where a highly developed and open-ended physics engine controls all the action. In this particular flavor, you play the part of the demolition squad assisting various members of each city to demolish certain structures to make way for other things. Don't worry, no malicious activity here... Until the Aliens ask you to blow up earth, but don't worry you only see that if you manage to finish the game.

Essentially, each level has a height requirement that you need to get the building to drop below with the first few levels being easy and progressively getting harder. You have a limited number of 'Dynamite Points' for each level, and it is a fixed number so no infinite upgrading and just winning. In fact the only upgrades are more or less forced, and are used to buy different types of dynamite ranging from bundles of 5 to the ultra-super-fantastico-omg-I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-Butter 'experimental' dynamite... It's pretty awesome stuff when you get it.

There are virtually an infinite number of ways to beat each level due to the complexity of the physics engine. Sometimes the solution is MUCH easier then you would think.. Believe it or not all initial 5 stages can be beat using a single placement of dynamite, this is again due to the wonderful game engine.

Now the game does get more challenging, to the point where some stages give you as many as 300 'Dynamite Points'... And believe me sometimes you need it.

Added difficulty in some stages, besides getting the building under a certain height, is the addition of obstacles that are of value and shouldn't be destroyed. This can add greatly to the complexity of each job...

OK that is a lie, you never need to worry about cash so as long as you don't wreck EVERYTHING you are always OK... a bit of a useless addition to a good game.

I really was quite happy to play this through. There is just so much diversity in some of the level design that you develop interesting 'techniques'. My favorite would be featured here, and I call it 'Gibbing a building'. To Gib is of course taken from shooter games, but essentially you stack bundles of 1 dynamite EVERYWHERE, and the building essentially explodes from the inside out in every direction... Hilarious to watch.

The music and soundtrack fits the games laid back atmosphere, and while the sound does get bothersome at times, you can always disable it. Like I said, this game fits the flash profile perfectly. I encourage you all to try it.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.9/5

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Flash Game Review: The Worlds Hardest Game

2010-02-25T22:20:00.002-05:00

That isn't just my opinion, that's the name of the game. That is correct, this review is dedicated to quite possibly the hardest flash game in the entire world, definitely harder then anything else I have ever played.

You will slam your head against your keyboard and swear to destroy the creators of The Worlds Hardest Game over at Snubby Land, and probably quit by lvl 6... out of 30. And all you need to do is to navigate your little red box around the screen, collect the few gold coins, and get to the green square. Make sure you don't get hit by the blue circles or you need to start back over, either at a save point green box, or the start of the level.

Thats it.

And you will want to die.

This game comprises of fast reflexes, good planning, handy keyboard skills and a touch of luck... Wait, no no, no luck is involved the physics are exact and the collision is pretty damn good. Obviously the main point of this game is to avoid the little blue circles be they stationary or moving at a rather high velocity.

Level design varies immensely, and getting stuck on a level is not unheard of... You simply won't be able to beat it. And most levels are prefaced with an encouraging message... Not.

Even tho you have infinite chances.

That's right, this game is not about the fastest time, or getting through before you run out of lives. No.. you have an unlimited number of chances at every level. Score is determined instead by how many deaths you have, and the less the better. But trust me, you will not have only a couple.

As you progress through The Worlds Hardest Game, you will start to see patterns emerge, timing certain movements around certain blue moving circles, and levels will start to blur together.

But don't worry, I am not suggesting you try and beat the entire game. You probably can't, I know I never did.

Take each level one at a time, and see if you can get to level 10. If you can good work, that I think is the milestone for the average gamer in a 30 minute time window.

Careful tho, you might get hooked.

The addictive elements of this game are huge, from the catchy home made music track, to the simplistic nature of the game play and the basic controls it really will get you hooked.

The Worlds Hardest Game is definitely one that is tough to step away from, but eventually you will get so frustrated with one level you will probably just close the browser out of pure and total frustration. But once you are done with it, check out The Worlds Hardest Game 2.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 5.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.5/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.1/5

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Flash Game Review: Extreme Heli Boarding

2010-02-24T10:00:00.062-05:00

So due to the travesty I had to play yesterday, today I decided to see if the genre of mini flash snowboarding games could save itself from totally flaming... AND IT DID! Coming in at almost 14 Million Plays on one site alone, we bring you: Extreme Heli Boarding!

I was so relieved when I played this game after the first 30 seconds.

So, so so relieved. This game is absolutely fantastic! It encompasses all the elements that make a good flash game good, and it is HIGHLY addictive. Nearly every comment about this game is calling it addictive and fun to constantly play.

Users are in control of a snowboarder that dropped out of a helicopter onto a frigged mountain top. Your goal is to rack up point by collecting stars and pulling out sick aerial maneuvers. Also your run has a limited time, which can be increased by collecting the other kind of star and thus extending your run.

Avoiding wild animals, and downed logs are also important as these will detract from the amount of time when you wipe out. Runs being with only 30 seconds on the clock.

Now the actual run appears to be built from pre-designed segments of terrain which are supposed to fit together to create a randomly generated mountain. Now while for the most part this does work, sometimes you are given very odd scenarios with logs or animals that are impossible to get around... Luckily the unique physics engine is there to save the day, and let us jump REALLY high... oh 'space' is jump.

To be quite frank, the physics are manageable, and while CLEARLY not perfect... I mean you just hold the direction you want to g, Up is forward Down is reverse; reverse on a snowboard... it doesn't really matter, the game is fun as hell. And these tricks you pull out, guess what, no silly button mashing or trying to remember long combinations... nope just press the tilt buttons, do a full rotation and collect the points. Add more spins into a single air time and increase the points.

A scoring system that makes sense. Also, perfect landings will double whatever score you were going to get, encouraging you to not over rotate but instead be like an Olympic gymnast... Stick That Landing!

The music in this title really is catchy, there is no way to disable it but I actually enjoyed it... Probably because the games sound track was sampled by programmer, Martijn Kunst from the NES title 'California Games'.

A few things I would have wanted would have been a simple, restart level option, but instead you have to find your way back to the main menu and then start a new game... I am sure this feature would have been easy enough to do, and save end users ALOT of hassle. However I'm only being that critical of a small function because everything else about it really is good.

I Highly recommend playing this game... and not the other snowboarding one.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.5/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.0/5

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Flash Game Review: Supreme Extreme Snowboarding

2010-02-23T23:03:00.000-05:00

Normally when I am doing a review, I enjoy the games, I get caught up, I try and finish them and usually I stretch past 30 minutes. With this one I was watching the clock begging for that 30 minutes to be up.

Supreme Extreme Snowboarding by These Russians has to hands down be THE WORST game I have ever played... Ever. Yes this thing is worse then some of those stupid dating games that take 4 minutes. This game is so terrible.. and not terrible in the way that makes you laugh at the horror, like movies or funny YouTube clips. No this is the kind of bad that makes me embarrassed to call myself a programmer every now and then.

Lets start at the beginning. The premise of the game is to go down the hill on a snowboard, preform some tricks, try not to crash, and hope the judges give you a high enough score to move on.

I am pretty sure the judges scores are COMPLETELY RANDOM. Yes, they make no sense at all, whether you complete the tricks, add a dozen more or crash, your score still seems to get pulled from thin air. You can literally get two 10's and a 3. I love the effect of judges taking their time to score you, because CLEARLY they just pulled a random integer for the number of seconds before the judge rates you.

Now, assuming the judges score IS based on something real, like tricks, lets hit the slopes.

Well ok there are multiple hills... but they make no sense. I feel like this flash game had no level testing at all. When you go off some jumps, you land on the edge of others and just crash. The game will glitch you from being upside down to being right side up. You actually just bounce off the snow when you land, and the physics makes NO sense at all. The longer you hold the rotation button, the faster you rotate.

Yes cause humans can affect their rotational speeds in mid air with that amount of perfect control... Oh but it calls it 'balance'.

Balance would be if this game had balance. I mean the sound is even stupid with the idea that the music stops and starts everytime you go down the hill... Oh and by the way the runs last about 8 seconds, if you make it down. If you don't make it down, and you crash... Well every crash in the game uses the exact same animation, and it will end up looking like this.

These Russians REALLY screwed up this game.

I mean, I am not one to openly flame anyone, but I am fairly sure I could learn flash, and write a better game with my eyes shut. This thing doesn't have an interface, sometimes the space button to start doesn't work... the pause button in the middle of a run makes no sense considering it takes 8 seconds to get down the hill... All in all, this is probably the lowest score I have ever given a game on this site to date. I am not even going to describe how to do tricks because you SHOULDN'T PLAY THIS GAME

... Let me stress that again...

I would recommend NEVER playing this game

Go play this one instead. It's fun, and highly addictive.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.0/5
Interface: 1.5/5
Addictiveness: 1.0/5
Sound: 2.0/5
Simplicity: 2.5/5

Overall: 1.6/5

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Flash Game Review: Pandemic 2

2010-02-23T02:29:00.001-05:00

Infect mankind. Eradicate all life. Pray Madagascar doesn't close their port. These three things are the key fundamentals in the sinisterly infectious sequel, Pandemic 2.

After infecting the world with zombies in the non-stop entertainment game Infectonator: World Dominator I decided to take my devious intentions to the next level. Pandemic 2 sponsored by crazymonkeygames.com is an intelligent game based around the ideas of complexity realism and an added touch of darkness.

Plus it is REALLY fun.

My initial impression was 'Oh great another game that will suck 30 minutes of my life away and all it has is a cool sound track.' Well I was right about the sound track, but that's about it. This game really stepped up the to plate with the amount of ingenuity and creativity, bringing together several different elements incorporated with strategy games to produce a good product.

Two modes are available, one simplistic one, and one with more realism... Clearly only the one with more realism is worth your time.

Now because I knew this game would be complicated, I didn't bother with the tutorial and just stepped right in. I figure who needs tutorials right?

I was half right.

Users are put in charge of initiating, supporting, and evolving an infectious plague as it spreads across the world. Your first choice is the type of infection; Viral, Bacterial or Parasitic. Each choice has its benefits, be it a faster rate of infection or harder to detect globally, there are several options.

I personally went with the one more like a ninja, since I myself am part ninja.

The world map will jump up with navigation in the top left, under which is a live text box with global news and events. You can see planes flying and ships sailing, and users can also chose to speed up or slow down the rate of the game in the lower right.

There is an option on the first menu to disable music, but man the soundtrack is so perfect who would want to.

Play continues with something called 'Evolution Points'. These points are gathered over time, and the rate is determined by what type of infection you chose at the start. You can use these points to augment certain characteristics of your disease. Everything from whether people sweat when they have it, to if it is an airborne infection can be controlled.

More and more dangerous symptoms can be acquired through upgrading and unlocking with valuable evolution points. It should be noted, getting rid of a symptom also costs points, this is because it makes your infection less noticeable... which is VERY important.

Once you start to spread wide enough, and the death toll begins to climb the game begins to shine with realism.

Countries will start to close their airports. They will keep children home from school. Even go so far as to burn dead bodies, all to stop the spread of infection. Countering this is your primary objective, and as I found, can be accomplished most easily by having few or no symptoms, and being highly resilient to medication.

Just hope that Madagascar doesn't close their seaport before you infect them... it's the only way in.

After a period of time the global community will start to try and develop a vaccine to prevent against the spread of infection. The only solution to this is to be so infectious, and so deadly that you force countries to close hospitals and hope you don't eradicate them all.

But that is exactly what I did.

There is a top score, but considering I don't even know what generates points, it really doesn't serve a purpose. Infecting the world, and ending the human condition is all you should be worried about... that and stupid Madagascar.

Rating:

Longevity: 5.0/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 4.1/5

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Flash Game Review: Red Remover

2010-02-22T00:50:00.001-05:00

WE HATE THE RED!

Well OK this is not a post against communism, I've got no beef with those reds, this is a post against the miserable red shapes that must be removed from the pretty scenes in a VERY unique puzzler that we look at today.

Red Remover by: Gaz Thomas who runs The Game Homepage has created a beautiful little puzzle game with an extremely interesting take on physics.

Think gravity in 4 separate directions... more on that later.

So the game is a very simple puzzle game that becomes all that more complex, like most puzzlers. Users don't like the miserable red blocks, so they must be removed. This happens just by clicking on them.

We like the green blocks, so don't get rid of those.
And the innocent blue blocks... well those can go away or stick around, whatever.

That's it... and this transpires into mind boggling game play, the likes of which will drive the average gamer up the wall with frustration, however in about 30 minutes I hit level 36, but I am everything if your average gamer... I assume most will get stuck on level 29.

In any event, the reason this game possesses so much of a good feeling is one, there is a tiny soundtrack that plays at the start of the game, however that is it... feel free to right click to play it again, I know I did several times.

But the real catch is in the fact that once you pass level 10 the physics takes a change for the more... complicated.

4 directional physics is now a reality, with the direction the block is looking and smiling representing the direction it will fly...

This leads to some of the most creative, and probably difficult level designs ever. And really the physics engine is perfect, I mean it would have to be to allow for something like this.

Really you need to go and play this game, and when you are done if you want more check out the HUGE fan forum dedicated to it found, Here.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.5/5
Interface: 4.0/5
Addictiveness: 3.0/5
Sound: 3.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.5/5

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Flash Game Review: Recoil

2010-02-21T00:54:00.002-05:00

Taken straight from the games description: "Brave little cursor! Travel through a dangerous landscape with nothing but your cheery bounce. Avoid enemies and make for the exit!" And to be quite frank, that is exactly what I felt the entire time I was trying to get to that exit.
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Recoil By: Mirosurabu Games is a puzzle game that will make your fingers work overtime. With it's old school graphics, and classic simple controls this one really pulls it off and with 20 levels to beat, it is the PERFECT 30 minute game... granted it took me 40 minutes to finish it.

You literally control a coil that bounces due to gravity, and other objects.. and you can control only its direction with the left and right arrows.

The physics engine in this is beautiful, allowing for wall jumps and a plethora of other fantastic things. The controls take a little bit to get used to, and honestly the first 3 or 4 levels take ALOT longer then the next few as you get used to basic techniques like how to climb steps, and how to take 2 block jumps vs 1 block jumps.

The game introduces each element slowly, like blocks that break when you hit them once, and NITRO... the green stuff that makes your life miserable.

More variety in levels comes from features as I listed like wall jumps; those tricky maneuvers will put the casual gamer that is not committed to finishing to rest, but once mastered they almost feel natural.

And these blocks let you FLLLYYYYY!!!

No joke, they launch your coil into flight, with the trajectory being set according to that little white portion. Flight can be controlled with, again, the left and right arrow keys, and once you hit a flat surface you again have nothing but your cheery bounce.

Level design is very creative, ranging from levels where you start on bricks that only allow for 1 jump, to a level where you start falling into a pit.

Instructions for everything from how to move, to how to wall-jump are given at the appropriate level.

Now the sound track might not suit some people, its feeling of a cross between retro-electronica and what sounds like current bands can be jarring at first. If it doesn't suit your style just pressing 'M' will toggle it on and off, a handy feature.

Also handy is the fact that anytime you do anything outside the game's window be it alt+tab or just click, the game instantly pauses. Clicking back into the window will resume it, a feature I think every game should incorporate.

All-in-all I was impressed with the simplistic nature of the game. There is also a score system based on how many times you die on a particular level, and how fast you clear them... but who cares we are not looking to be the best, just to be entertained.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 4.0/5
Sound: 3.0/5
Simplicity: 4.5/5

Overall: 3.8/5

Flash Game Review: Infectonator World Dominator

2010-02-19T23:42:00.002-05:00

What do Ronald McDonald, Colonel Sanders and Micheal Jackson all have in common? THEY ARE ZOMBIES! Another zombie game, I can't help it, but this one... well... I guarantee if you start playing, you will finish.
Infectonator: World Dominator by: Toge Productions takes a slightly different spin on the classical zombie game. Here I can only guess we are scientists of epic proportions who's only goal is world infection and destruction!

And it is fun!

I was once again sitting in class when I heard a friend across say, "Stupid Sanders why can't you be more like MJ and infect better." Needless to say I was perplexed, and interested, so I investigated. Today's gem is what I found.

This game, I can almost assure you, you will finish. It isn't very difficult, you can't lose, and it becomes progressively easier.

Players control the spread of what is clearly a strain of the deadly T-Virus... don't know what that is? Just Google it.

They are in control of where the outbreak will start in each city, and players must try and infect more and more innocent civilians as the game progress'. Zombie upgrades are purchased along the way to make your little guys more infectious, faster, or even longer lasting once they become undead.

Once the infection starts there is no stopping it, and while the chaos is going on, and people are dying, children eating their mothers brains out... You pocket the cash.

That's right, while the infection is running its course you had better be fast, and drag your cursor over the cash that drops out of peoples pockets... And why do we need money?

To purchase more upgrades, and infect more and more cities across the globe. World Infection is the only solution to this problem known as humanity.

Once players reach certain key cities they get super zombies. MJ, Sanders and Ronald are but a few, and each have key traits that make them effective at spreading the deadly virus. Be it zombie chickens, or a following of zombies that appear with him, these super zombies will help spread the deadly disease.

The sound effects and graphics are wonderful, classic 8-bit suits the game perfectly, and trust me anything more would kill your computer.

Yes this game is processor intensive, I suggest turning down the setting to Medium or Low if it starts to get choppy, which at least you can do.

I have to admit I loved playing this flash game, nothing beats the endless waves of civilians waiting to get eaten.

You can always save your data if the game gets to long, and score isn't just... infect the world... no it is how fast you can do it.

That's right, speed is of the essence here, and I encourage everyone to play through it twice, once to get used to it, and the second to try and get a high score.

To begin, work through the tutorial, it is very fast and easy and you will start spreading the plague in no-time.

So what are you waiting for, go out and complete the mission that the Umbrella Corporation is paying you to do.

Infect and pillage!

Rating:

Longevity: 4.0/5
Interface: 4.5/5
Addictiveness: 5.0/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 4.3/5

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Flash Game Review: Bubble Cannon 2

2010-02-18T14:07:00.003-05:00

Yeah sooo... this was a mistake, I mean if you are looking for a quick thing to kill 20 minutes before class by all means Bubble Cannon 2 can provide that relief, but thats about it.

To quote a friend of mine who I was sitting next to, playing the same game as her, "They probably spelled 'Bleue' wrong because they are dumb." This definitly sets the mood for the entire game, and trust me I am not wrong.

However since I must be objective in my rating, and fair, Bubble Cannon 2 by Gaz had some up points. A new take on the classic Bubble Bobble [released circa 1986] which if you haven't played just hit Alt+F4 now... does have some interresting ideas.

Game play consists of using a cannon-type launcher to shoot bubbles at one another, and to begin, the game is fairly simple. Users get score for popping bubbles, which ingeniously is done everytime you hit a bubble with the same color.

Every level you go up another color is added.

There end up being alot of colors...

I do like the game physics, totally clean and doing exactly what you would want them to, and sadly I had no sound to speak of while doing this review, since I was sitting next to someone in class, and just needed to kill sometime. So if that is what you need to do, and nothing more, then by all means check out Bubble Cannon 2... otherwise, if you want a REAL flash game... don't.

Rating:

Longevity: 1.5/5
Interface: 3.5/5
Addictiveness: 2.0/5
Sound: 2.5/5
Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 2.6/5

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Flash Game Review: Crush the Castle

2010-02-15T20:29:00.002-05:00

Ye Siege Master! Thy King requires your assistance! Dispense with our enemies, let none survive, main and butcher then all!!! And Crush their Castle!

I apologize for the overzealous use of exclamation points, by my word what an amazing find.
Crush the Castle is pure unadulterated win. Produced in-house by Armor Games, this is one that you really do not want to pass up. Developed back in 2009 as a remake of a game called Castle Clout, Crush the Castle is everything you want in a flash game, and so much more.

The game play is precisely as it sounds. Your job as siege master is to use your Trebucet, and various types of projectiles, be they bundles of stone or explosive payloads, to destroy castles.

The game is broken up into levels where you have a limited number of shots in which you must kill all people... while laughing at their comical death sounds.

Speaking of sounds, this game really does fall well here. With a good sound base, and the ability to disable sounds at any point while playing, I don't see a way they could have been improved.

Now back to the game. Mechanics in this are well planned, and perfectly coded. You will feel like you are demolishing buildings in this flash title, while still being entertained. With 24 castles to crush, you would assume i would think much of this game past the 30 minute mark.

WRONG!

There is a MASSIVE online community around this game, so much so that they released a second updated version call the players pack with an expanded number of castles, and more diverse options.

While I am not one for level design, it is built directly into the game engine, and fully encouraged by armor games. This game has it's own dedicated forum found here.

The simplicity and surrealism of taking down fortified structures, medieval style, REALLY makes me want to go back and keep playing. I have to say, this is the most addictive game I have yet to review.

It takes the cake, and I can't stop talking positively about everything. The tutorial lasts about 8 seconds, and the game is so intuitive I don't even think they need it.

At any rate, stop reading and go play Crush the Castle NOW.

Rating:

Longevity: 5.0/5
Interface: 5.0/5
Addictiveness: 4.5/5
Sound: 4.5/5
Simplicity: 5.0/5

Overall: 4.8/5

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Ray - A name to be feared

2010-02-14T15:21:00.001-05:00

Remember back to elementary school, and those chose your own adventure books that we all loved and held so dear... Well I present a chose your own adventure game.

The Ray series of games are great. That about sums up everything in as short as I can put it.

Like really.

They are based on the idea of non-linear story line, in which users are put in control of something that is closer to a movie, with small mini games sprinkled throughout. Decisions are presented in a multiple-choice fashion, for example:

What should you do to this bum:
a)Nothing, just walk by.
b)Piss on him, that scum needs more filth.
c)Steal his coat.
d)Waste that POS

... For the back story, Ray is a local street thug and hitman, that roams the city doing deeds for his boss, pulling jobs and wasting mobsters. He has no regrets, and no problems blasting anyone or anything that crosses his path.

The animation in this movie-game is superb, considering the brunt of all the work that went into the game series is done by one guy: Phil.

Players throughout are given scores based on how good their decision making skills are, with a better score being awarded to how bad-ass you are.. killing is good.

If you make a bad decision, and get Ray killed in the process it's OK. The game has a friendly system to deal with death, getting caught, or killing the wrong person, you just get warped back to the decision screen that had that even occur, and you get to redo your option.

Ray 1 and Ray 2, definitely warrant the time to go through them both more then once, as each new decision can take you somewhere more exciting then the last, and the game boasts huge amounts of game play.

Ray 3-Introduction is more of a straight movie, it introduces elements that we are told will be present in Ray 3 when it gets released. And lets say I will be looking out for it. Boasting 60 minutes of game play, with multiple story paths from the start, and more of a free-roam type play, I look forward to more killing.

So while this game is not as interactive as some of the rest, maybe it doesn't have as much of an addictive quality, but everyone needs to play through it at least once.

Give Ray a chance... or else.

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5

Interface: 4.0/5

Addictiveness: 3.0/5

Sound: 4.5/5

Simplicity: 4.5/5

Overall: 3.8/5

More zombie fun for the whole family

2010-02-13T20:19:00.003-05:00

So I am on a zombie playing game it would seem, between my last post, and today's, I think enough carnage is enough carnage. Actually todays game wasn't REALLY a zombie game when it came to feeling...

It was more of a side scrolling styled shooter.

Actually that is exactly what it was. Zombieland by urbansquall is a mildly entertaining game. I say mildly only because i found the game EXTREMELY limited in how much fun it delivers, I mean the idea of skateboarding around blasting through zombies is fantastic, but when put into practice the game really falls short.

It is extremely sloooowwwww paced it feels like, and again, extremely limited everything...

On the bright side, Zombieland does have some redeeming qualities, like the fact that you get to mow down zombies in a Zamboni of death and destruction.

So, to begin players are using what I would say looks like a Nerf gun or something, however you get a new gun you just roll over a crate on the ground, and start shooting...

I really hated the weapon system in this game, I mean you have a timer that ends your ability to use that weapon, and you can't save them, you can't stock pile, you can't do anything but use the game you have to use. Really a terrible system for weapons, and also you can find health containers strewn about the ground at random intervals.

When you run into a zombie, or undead-thing, you take a point of damage, and to be honest the animations for that are mildly amusing, like being regurgitated.

Gamers advance to higher levels where the number of zombies on the screen coming at you will grow, and eventually you can fight mini bosses... these bosses basically are reliant on you getting a ranged weapon other then a shotgun... and killing them REALLY isn't hard at all. In fact they are easier then regular zombie waves.

Picking up the keys to your ride lets you mow down zombies in your Zamboni, and during regular play make sure you avoid the lady driving the yellow car. She spells instant doom no matter what your life total.

Overall, I had a friend REALLY hype this game up, only to be sadly let down...

Atleast it had a mute button...

Rating:

Longevity: 2.0/5

Interface: 4.0/5

Addictiveness: 2.5/5

Sound: 2.0/5

Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 2.8/5

All I wanted was a sword...

2010-02-11T23:11:00.002-05:00

At some point during the game I am about to describe... the only thought that went through my head was, I don't need to reload swords... why can't I get a sword.

Endless Zombie Rampage by Diseased Productions is precisely what you would expect. It is a bloody mess of bullets, corpses and non-stop violence... and non-stop sound considering there is no.. turn off sound switch.

Like... none.

At all...

Wtf is that shit...

Users are protecting a compound of some kind, and game play is REALLY REALLY simple... like, you click, things die. But don't get to cocky, when you first get started you will probably think it is easy, and it is, but difficulty scales well, and levels are challenging.

The game adds to itself with upgrades, and power-ups, and replenishing your health, and upgrades, and I actually played this for like 3 hours... and of course this is in defense mode...
In survival mode, you are given a set amount of experience to upgrade... and then see how long you can last. But more on that later.

The system works well, you kill stuff, you move through each wave and get exp which you then spend on upgrading to new guns, super human abilities, and various other things, this is done after each segment of time/wave.

There are a few problems with this system. Firstly, upgrade to soon, to the wrong type of gun and the zombies become unmanageable, even for the best gamer such as myself. Upgrade properly and get everything maxed out.. and well you end up in the position I was in last night...

Where you are using the highest upgrade of automatic shotgun... and you feel like you are erasing zombies instead of having to shoot them... and you have OVER 9000 health... and your base has OVER 9000 health... that's when you just go to sleep.

But getting there is no easy task. Pushing yourself to survive harder and harder waves to upgrade to better guns is critical, like I said, upgrading to early means you can't deal with certain waves, and try to upgrade 1 wave... and it is already to late.

Survival mode was quite the challenge. Which upgrades are the most useful, and what will allow you to survive the longest.. with the idea that you ARE going to die, and lose... so it is all about lasting, choosing a weapon is hard enough, but then do you get the speed upgrade, or just go straight pain inflicting potential! You the user decide!

All in all, I was quite happy slaughtering zombies, the graphical details, and the fact that the blood stays on the ground just made me want to keep playing :D.

If Any of you know of any other zombie games, I'd love to try them, so leave a comment and let me know your high score in this one too!

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5

Interface: 5.0/5

Addictiveness: 4.5/5

Sound: 3.0/5

Simplicity: 4.0/5

Overall: 3.9/5

Lemmings Lemmings Lemmings Lemmings Lemmings

2010-02-04T02:52:00.001-05:00

So today I decided to do a friend a favor. She had requested I put up a game dating all the way back to 1991. Lemmings games have been seen on almost all gaming platforms, from the original Amiga personal computer all the way to the PlayStation 3. This highly addictive game is what we will look at today.

While this version of lemmings isn't actually a flash-based game, it was the only version I could find that was a close port of the original.

And it is still just as mind-numbingly painful to play.

For those new to the genre it can be said that lemmings is the predecessor of the modern RTS(Real Time Strategy) game. Amiga Power said it best, "[Lemmings] was the first major game to introduce the 'indirect-control' concept", something common to almost all RTS's.

Indirect control is what Lemmings is built on. Once a level has been selected, game play begins with a trapdoor opening, and lemmings begin falling at a user-controlled rate.

An individual lemming will simply walk, oblivious to the dangers around him, until he hits a wall and turns around, reaches the goal and can return home, or finds his impending doom in one of the many traps that mark the landscape.

Players must save a designated number, sometimes as few as 1 to as many as 100, by brilliant creativity, ingenious planning, and nimble fingers.

The user can give each lemming an ability, be it tunneling through a barrier, or building a bridge across a gap, however each level places a limitation on the number of times you can assign the ability, as well as removes the use of some abilities altogether.

This makes you go insane.

Nothing is more devastating then planning a beautiful strategy to navigate the mindless lemmings home safely, only to realize you miscalculated and can't finish your bridge, and all 100 of the lemmings plummet to their doom, forcing you to restart the level and try again.

This version has options to disable sound and music separately, and saves your progress via a client side cookie. 40 levels are divided into the 4 original categories: Fun, Tricky, Taxing, and Mayhem.

And let me tell you, some levels are HUGE time wasters, spending an hour or more for a level that has a time limit of 4 minutes is not uncommon. And with at least half of the levels falling into that category, this addictive classic will make you want to go back for seconds...or thirds.. or fourths..

I encourage all of you to try your hand, play through a couple levels and see how fun a blast from the past can be, and let me know if you want me to review a specific game, or something from a particular genre.

Play Here - make sure you have java scripting enabled, as that is what the game is written in.

Rating:

Longevity: 5.0/5

Interface: 3.5/5

Addictiveness: 4.5/5

Sound: 3.5/5

Simplicity: 3.0/5

Overall: 3.9/5

Non-stop helicopter killing action!

2010-02-01T01:12:00.007-05:00

Due to yesterdays horrendous game found Here, I decided to take a safe route, and share with you a classic game that I've been playing since high school. Heli Attack 2 by squarecircle co. is an addictive, nonstop action game, that is really really addictive... like, I ended up playing not for 30 minutes, but for 2 1/2 hours.

So if you don't want to enjoy a highly entertaining game, just stop reading and go on to your boring mundane, non railgun-grapplehookusing-Abombs filled life.

Me, I'm going to swing back over to Heli Attack 2, and kill more stuff.

Firstly, this game is relatively simple. It's a 2D game where users control what I would call a super soldier, and shoot down an endless supply of helicopters. Power-ups and ammo allow players an easier time, and provide for a variety of tactics and technique to survive as long as possible.

The helicopters difficulty is directly controlled by how fast they shoot at you, and the level goes up every 1,000,000 points I believe.

You need to jump, move and duck, all in order to avoid the little red pellets that will sound your timely doom.

Oh, and you can also preform super jumps and distort time... Yes, Neo is making a come back!

Health power-ups also present themselves every 15 or 30 helicopters...you could literally continue until your keyboard snapped in half... then you wouldn't able to pause.

Speaking of pausing the game, lets talk features that are critical.

YES! You CAN change the controls. That's right, with this title you are not restricted to the preset controls that everyone hates and despises, also the sound can be disabled; I always find this a good feature...I'm sure Neo would have his IPod cranking techno if he ever has to take down an endless fleet of helicopters.

Also, having a top score submit screen adds to the competitive edge this game offers.
All in all... I'm going to stop writing now and go back to playing Heli Attack 2, join me and let me know what you thought down below!

Rating:

Longevity: 3.0/5

Interface: 4.0/5

Addictiveness: 4.5/5

Sound: 3.5/5

Simplicity: 3.5/5

Overall: 3.7/5

My space bar got hammered over and over...

2010-01-30T23:40:00.002-05:00

If you feel like wailing on your space bar to reset, and retry a level, then Max Dirt Bike by Max Games is the game for you. Based off a lot of similar trial-biking style games... this on has a few interesting... quirks, none of which are appealing to the user...

The first problem, and I know dear readers I comment on this a lot, but I just don't grasp how game designers miss it... is the inability to turn off the sound effects.

They have a quality setting, but I cannot turn off the annoying sounds... Anyway on to game play.

It is totally linear, users are in control of what seems to be some sort of motorized bike... it isn't on dirt, but apparently they think it is still a dirt bike... I was confused. Arrow keys control the movement, with up and down being forward and reverse, and left and right causing your rider to preform some interesting pelvic thrust maneuvers. These motions are "supposed" to rock the bike based on some fancy physics... however as we all know, flash games have the worst physics of all.

The reason I say you will hammer your space key is because it is the reset button for when you crash.

The most effective way of getting through harder levels was just press random buttons and you will get lucky eventually...

The entire game is timed, with an overall time based on every level... but since there is no score submit, and no tracking of any kind... who cares?
Overall this game might be worth 15 or 20 minutes of your time, but I struggled to make it the full half an hour. Once you finish the game, it sends you back to level 1 for who knows what reasoning.

Also for some odd reason the background and track color change every 5 levels... They are like an 80's hipster... trying to be cool.

Anyway, after this disappointment I'm looking for a good bike game with similar game play to this one to review, so if you know of any drop me the link!

Rating:

Longevity: 1.0/5
Interface: 2.0/5
Addictiveness: 2.0/5
Sound: 1.5/5
Simplicity: 2.5/5

Overall: 1.8/5
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